


Blackout

by King Baka (kingbaka22)



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: Complete, F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-12-25
Updated: 2015-09-03
Packaged: 2018-01-06 00:35:46
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 48
Words: 328,561
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1100382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kingbaka22/pseuds/King%20Baka
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>*COMPLETE*  A night of celebration yields life-altering consequences for Inuyasha and Kagome.  Can they weather the storm, or will the consequences of their actions prove too much to handle?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Blackout: Anatomy of a Lost Evening

**Author's Note:**

> A/N – Hello, everyone! It’s been quite a while since I wrote a major project. But I got to thinking about how in all of my previous works, Inuyasha and Kagome only have sex after their feelings are realized and revealed. But sex doesn’t always happen that way. Teenagers are prone to irresponsibility and lapses of judgment. And let’s face it, even though Inuyasha is apparently many years older than Kagome, physically and emotionally both of them are teenagers. 
> 
> As to the setting, this story is written as a divergence from the anime/manga. It takes place soon after Naraku’s defeat at the hands of Inuyasha and his Red Tetsusaiga. So the Band of Seven arc has not yet taken place, and Kikyou has not been saved by Kagome’s healing touch. She is still wandering the earth, bound to her artificial body by hatred and bitterness. Inuyasha and Kagome have grown closer in their time together, but they are not nearly as close as later in the canon. All of that, however, is about to change in a way that neither expected. Enjoy!

Inuyasha sat up with a groan, and immediately regretted it.  His head was pounding, his temples throbbing angrily.  Either a giant oni was bashing his skull repeatedly with a rock, or there were a thousand tiny Sesshoumaru whacking his brain with miniature Tokijin.  Or he was just hung over. 

 

He would guess the latter, considering the residue of alcohol he could still taste on his breath.  But since he had never been hung over before, he wasn’t sure what to expect.  He opened his eyes to gather his bearings, but quickly slammed them shut again.  Even inside this strange room he was in, with the mat covering the door, the morning light was still entirely too bright.  His poor retinas screamed as if they’d been scorched, but his tear ducts lacked any spare moisture to generate tears.  His throat was parched as well, and he knew the first order of business once he rose would be to find something to drink.  Something without alcohol in it.  His stomach churned at the thought of drinking any more of _that_ stuff, though thankfully he felt no urge to vomit.  As his memories of the previous evening came back to him, he began to piece together exactly how he had wound up in this sorry state. 

 

It had started out ordinarily enough, with him and his friends rescuing a damsel in distress from the clutches of some rogue youkai or another.  It just so happened, however, that this damsel was the only child of the wealthiest man in one of the largest and richest human settlements he had ever come across.  Their exceedingly grateful host had thrown them a rather lavish celebration, complete with musicians, serving girls, and plenty of sake.  Inuyasha had wanted to refuse the invitation, but Miroku was inside and flirting with the serving girls before he could get the words out of his mouth.  Then they were stuck, especially because Kagome cared more about propriety than he did and didn’t want to be rude to their host.  Judging by how Sango had been fuming by that point, she’d just wanted to make sure Miroku didn’t get into too much trouble. 

 

“We’ll just stay at the party for a little bit, and then go to bed,” Kagome had whispered to him.  “You don’t even have to drink if you don’t want to.” 

 

He might have laughed at that thread of memory if he didn’t feel so miserable.  If only he had taken her advice.  But then, Kagome hadn’t exactly taken her _own_ advice, either.  Their host had been so keen to give them a toast, and had seemed so dejected when Kagome initially refused to drink, that she caved without too much of a fight.  And when she picked up the sake cup and turned to him with a wry smile, what did she say? 

 

“Well, I guess one little drink won’t hurt, right?” 

 

This time he did laugh, and again, immediately regretted it.  The sound of his own voice sent a fresh shockwave of pain through his head, even though his ears had already been plastered to his skull.  He couldn’t even stand the sound of his own heartbeat right now, and was desperately trying to avoid breathing through his nose.  Add scent to the list of hanyou senses he really didn’t want right now, and his overloaded brain might explode.  If there was ever a time to be rendered human, it was now. 

 

But the Kami showed him no such mercy, just as they had shown him no mercy last night by not making hanyou alcohol-resistant.  He was resilient against many things; stick a sword though his belly, and he’d pull it out and laugh at you.  Try to get him with smoke or miasma, and you’d be dead long before he even had to cough.  But alcohol…alcohol kicked his ass.  There was just something about the stuff that slipped past his youkai defenses and hammered him like any average mortal.  He would liken it to ink or other extremely smelly substances, but those affected him _because_ he was part-youkai, not in spite of it.  Alcohol was probably unique in this regard.  Maybe part of the problem was how little he had been exposed to it in the past.  From what he could gather, people who drank more often built up a tolerance to it. 

 

Tolerance be damned.  After last night, he was _never_ drinking again.  The next time someone tried to give him a jug of sake, he was going to shove it where the sun don’t shine.  If only that had been his attitude the previous evening…but _no_ , he just had to have a couple cups because Kagome asked him to.  And then he just _had_ to accept when the host’s younger brother challenged him to a drinking contest.  A ‘mighty hanyou’ couldn’t back down from such a challenge, especially when Kagome and the others were watching.  So even though he could already feel the alcohol getting to him, and even though he knew he was going to make a fool of himself, he still went drink-for-drink with the guy.  And won.  He had felt on top of the world, though perhaps that was because he’d been doing a victory dance on top of the table.  As much fun as he’d been having at the time, he was not enjoying the fruits of his victory very much now. 

 

In short, he was an idiot.  And now he was paying for it.  He wanted to lie back down, but didn’t dare.  He was in a strange place, and needed to get up and make sure Kagome and the others were okay.  He didn’t even remember if they’d gotten drunk or not.  His memories of last night were fuzzy, and at a certain point they cut out altogether.  He had probably passed out shortly after winning the drinking contest and been dragged here to sleep it off.  If a little harmless teasing was the worst that came of this, he would be happy.  Hopefully nothing bad had happened to his companions while he had been too inebriated to protect them.  He trusted his friends, but people did stupid things when they were drunk.  His rogue mind conjured possibilities which made him grit his teeth.  If someone had taken advantage of Kagome in some way, that person would be lucky to make it to midday with his cock attached.  Sango would take care of that herself if she was the victim, and Miroku was far more likely to be on the ‘giving’ end of dubious-consent drunken sex.  If the monk had somehow managed to get the slayer in bed, then Inuyasha was _sure_ he would be minus a cock within two minutes of Sango’s awakening.  But Kagome wasn’t like Sango.  If something had happened to her…he didn’t want to think about it. 

 

And so, because he suddenly found himself very concerned about Kagome’s well-being, Inuyasha forced himself to rise into a full sitting position.  His body protested, and it took several moments of holding his temples to get his head to stop spinning.  Finally, he was able to blearily blink his eyes open and tentatively raise his ears to listen to his surroundings.  He was in a single, medium-sized room, which appeared to be part of a larger complex.  Most likely, this was one of many guest rooms in the rich man’s home, clustered around a central courtyard.  On either side he could hear people snoring in adjacent rooms.  It would be as good a place as any to start searching for his missing companions. 

 

He was about to start the arduous process of rising to his feet when a flash of crimson caught the corner of his eye.  It was a clump of fabric crumpled into a ball where it had been haphazardly discarded.  In fact, it looked suspiciously like his—

 

Inuyasha looked down at himself and nearly choked.  Why the hell was he naked?!  He quickly scrambled on hands and knees toward his hakama, which he slid on and fastened without bothering to look for his fundoshi first.  Walking around sans undergarments was the least of his worries right now.  His head was spinning again, and now he was genuinely concerned about what _he_ might have done last night after his memory cut out.  If some poor girl woke up and realized that she slept with a hanyou…that was the sort of thing that could ruin a girl’s life in most villages.  Not to mention the fact that Kagome would ‘osuwari’ him straight to hell; he’d spend about a week climbing out of the crater.  Silently praying to every Kami he knew, he slowly turned back to face the futon he’d been sleeping in. 

 

Why did the Kami never listen to him?  Sure enough, there was a girl in his bed, naked judging by the extent of her bare back revealed by the sheet.  Yep, Kagome was going to kill him.  On principal alone, he was going to have to castrate himself.  Unless of course Kagome did it for him.  And depending on what this girl said about how exactly how they’d come to lie together last night, that seemed like a startlingly likely possibility.  He was not optimistic that she’d be understanding and admit to ‘mutual mistake.’  She’d probably cry rape to lessen the shame upon herself for sleeping with a hanyou.  He could only hope that Kagome and the others would believe him.  Nobody in the village would.  Hopefully the girl would stay asleep long enough for him to gather his companions and make a quiet exit. 

 

She chose that moment to stir, and Inuyasha held his breath.  But she only shifted slightly before settling down, somehow managing to slide the sheet even lower so the top of the crack of her backside was visible.  Inuyasha allowed himself a moment to peruse her form, then looked away.  She was very attractive, with a shapely body and long, raven hair that would probably be very pretty when it wasn’t so matted and tangled by nightly activities.  A normal human male would be thrilled to wake up next to such a beauty, even if she was a total stranger.  It would be something to brag about with close friends.  But hanyou were not permitted to enjoy such things.  He was lucky to have one male friend, and he could certainly not expect the girl’s reaction to be mere upset over her night of irresponsibility.  No, this girl would scream to high heaven and bring the wrath of an angry village down upon him.  It was time to go.  As soon as he found his haori and kosode. 

 

Find them he did, in the opposite corner of the room.  He tip-toed past the sleeping girl on shaky legs, gathering up his clothing—and Tetsusaiga—before turning to sneak past her and out the door.  He would finish dressing outside, where the rustling of his garments was less likely to wake her.  After a brief mental debate, he allowed himself a glance at her face, wanting to know what she looked like at least. 

 

And just like that, Inuyasha’s entire world came crashing down around him. 

 

This couldn’t be.  It wasn’t possible.  It was totally, completely, utterly _impossible_.  But unless his eyes were lying to him, the impossible had become reality.  Unless his mind was playing tricks on him, and he was somehow projecting the girl whose face he had memorized down to the finest detail onto someone else…  He was running around in circles, chasing his own tail with these denials.  There was one very simple way to know for sure, as much as he dreaded it.  So he gritted his teeth and breathed slowly and deeply through his nose. 

 

A veritable explosion of scent buffeted him, a cacophony of olfactory information which caused his head to throb with renewed vigor.  But though his nasal passages burned and the tiny abusive Sesshoumaru were back inside his skull, there was no denying what he smelled.  Four scents in particular stood out to him: the girl, sweat, blood, and most damningly, sex.  Just because he had never had sex before did not mean he was unfamiliar with its very particular aroma, produced by the various associated bodily fluids and secretions.  Sex had definitely occurred in this room very recently…on that futon…with that girl…  And judging by how his own body smelled upon closer inspection, combined with their sleeping arrangements and lack of clothing…Inuyasha had a feeling he knew exactly who her partner had been last night. 

 

In that moment, there was only one word to sum up precisely how Inuyasha felt about this revelation, one singular syllable which could encompass the totality of his emotions in all of their nuanced intricacy. 

 

“Shit.” 

 

 

A/N – Isn’t “shit” a great word?  Especially when you’re too hung over to think of anything more sophisticated.  This chapter is dedicated to everyone who has been where Inuyasha (or Kagome) is at one time or another.  We feel your pain. 

 

I don’t really have much of a basis for my theory that Inuyasha is not alcohol-resistant.  I remember there was an anime episode where he got tipsy, if not drunk.  Not sure if that was canon or one of those “anime-only” episodes.  At any rate, I don’t think it’s too much of a stretch, especially because he has built up absolutely no tolerance for the stuff.


	2. Morning-After Anxiety

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I did some research (or rather, Splendentgoddess helpfully reminded me), and it turns out that Inuyasha is affected by alcohol in the manga. It’s during chapter 486, where Sango talks to that sage guy about fixing hiraikotsu. Inuyasha gets repeatedly dunked in jars of sake and gets pretty tipsy, even though he couldn’t have ingested that much of the stuff. The sake affects Shippou too, so evidently alcohol is the great equalizer between humans and youkai! 
> 
> And someone asked about the length of this story. Hard for me to guess at this point, but I’m expecting maybe 20 chapters? Like Entrapment length, not Metamorphosis length.

Morning-After Anxiety

　

The first thing Kagome became aware of as she floundered back to consciousness was the rapid pulsing of her heart.  Every beat reverberated through her cranium, like a giant amplifier blasting a bassline at 150 decibels.  Her involuntary groan came out as a weak cough, a consequence of a parched throat.  Her mind was trapped in a haze of pain and lethargy, and she struggled to get her bearings.  Through fluttering eyes she glimpsed an unfamiliar wooden wall before she was forced to shut them again by the abnormally blinding light.  She could gather that she was lying on a futon in an unfamiliar room, but anything beyond that was more than she could manage.  That, and the disturbing queasiness of her stomach. 

Some instinct or thread of decorum drove her to seek a more appropriate place to expel the vomit she knew was coming.  She rolled into an unstable crouch, the resulting dizziness causing her belly to roil even more intensely.  Half walking, half crawling, she stumbled through the doorway and leaned over the edge of the wooden platform she could just barely make out through slitted, teary eyes. 

What followed was misery, pure and simple.  Where often times, expelling whatever was creating a disturbance in the stomach would bring some relief, by the time Kagome was finished she felt even more terrible than when she had started.  Not only was her throat dry, but now it stung fiercely as well.  She still could not open her eyes more than a fraction, lest her retinas set to burning.  And her stomach was still rumbling as well; she had a feeling that she was not yet finished with her gastric exhumation.  She certainly was not done with headache and soreness in seemingly every major muscle in her entire body. 

The one thing that made this small eternity of torment bearable occurred during, when a familiar item of cloth was draped over her shoulders.  Even in her cloudy mental state, she recognized Inuyasha’s haori when she felt it.  His action did serve to reveal that she was naked, but that only caused her to be doubly grateful for his consideration.  The hesitant yet comforting stroke of his hand as it rubbed her back was also appreciated.  His presence put her at some level of ease; she could at least know that she was safe, except from whatever curse was wracking her body. 

His hand left her back when she stopped vomiting, but she could still sense his presence behind her.  When she felt up to it, she sat back on her heels and leaned bonelessly into him.  He stiffened, but made no move to withdraw.  He also did not put his arm around her shoulder, as she had hoped that he would.  But she would content herself with the contact he permitted, glad that he was here with her in her time of suffering.  Here, with him, she could allow her mind to wander and try to figure out how she had ended up in this sorry state.   

She remembered sake—far too much sake, apparently.  Their host had been unusually gracious with his drink and gold, which he had used to bring together a celebration the likes of which Kagome had never seen in the feudal era before.  This was probably due to a combination of many factors, among them the rescue of his only child whom he doted on constantly, the fact that he was by nature a drinker and a ‘partier’ by the standards of the time, and the simple fact that he could afford it.  She had thought it too rude to refuse the invitation, especially when Miroku was already inside enjoying himself.  She had also seen the irritated look on Sango’s face and hoped, perhaps naively, that Miroku would show some restraint in the taijiya’s presence.  She knew Sango secretly liked the lecherous houshi.  How the evening had gone for either of them, Kagome could not say.  She could not even remember how her evening had ended. 

What she did know, was that she had dragged Inuyasha into the party with a promise that they could stay a little while and then go to bed.  Shippou and Kirara had done just that moments before, since it had already been fairly late.  They were the smart ones.  The dummies, i.e. the mature adults of the group, joined the celebration and were soon swept up by the festive atmosphere.  Even Kagome, whose tongue had never touched a drop of alcohol in her life, found herself unable to resist that first toast.  She groaned as she remembered her words, one of those incredibly foolish phrases which one looks back on later with contempt and dismay.  ‘One little drink’ had indeed not hurt, but the unknown quantity of alcohol she had consumed later certainly did. 

But why had she drunk so much in the first place?  Maybe it was because Inuyasha was pounding back sake like an alcoholic after a long dry spell.  Miroku and Sango were off doing their own thing, and she had been stuck carrying on an unwanted conversation with some of their host’s male relatives, who were clearly interested in her uncommon looks and strange clothing.  It was a difficult task trying to be polite enough not to offend, but not _too_ polite to give any of them the idea that they had any chance whatsoever of getting ‘lucky’ with her tonight.  Adding to her stress, she had to worry about Inuyasha going into a jealous fit and causing a scene.  That concern at least was unwarranted; the hanyou had quickly become so wasted that he would not have noticed if she had hopped into some stranger’s lap shouting ‘take me!’ 

Eventually her male suitors got the message and wandered off to find more enjoyable company.  So Kagome was left alone, growing more annoyed by the second.  Why should she be the only one at the party having no fun at all?  What was she, Inuyasha’s personal chaperone?  Her rising temper caused her to do something foolish.  All at once she downed a whole cup of sake, sidled up to one of the handsome gentlemen she had talked to previously, and started a whole new conversation.  This one was decidedly more ‘polite’ than before, and as she became more and more inebriated, he probably thought he had a very good chance of getting laid. 

Kagome gasped and sat up straight, an act which caused her head to swim and the bile to rise in the back of her throat.  Thankfully she was able to keep it down this time.  But of far greater concern was what she may or may not have done with any number of the interested males at the party.  Dreading what the action might reveal, she shifted her weight slightly from one thigh to another.  To her infinite dismay, there was a definite discomfort down there, unlike the general muscle soreness gripping the rest of her body, which was almost akin to the early onset of the flu.  The ache between her legs, on the other hand, was more localized, a sharp pain from unused muscles and untouched parts of her body which had dulled over time.  That, and the disquieting stickiness of her inner thighs, left no doubt as to exactly what had occurred last night. 

Tears sprung to her eyes, and she struggled to avoid collapsing into a pitiful ball of sobs.  That would come later, when she was alone in her room back home.  She did not want to show such weakness in front of Inuyasha; she was sure he already felt terrible for allowing this to happen to her.  It would be easy to blame him and their other friends for not staying with her at the party, or stopping her from getting so drunk.  But she wouldn’t do that either; in the end, this was her fault.  She had behaved incredibly irresponsibly, and this was her punishment. 

It seemed a harsh penalty.  She felt empty inside, like someone had stolen something from her, something she could never get back.  There was something missing now, a part of her which she had valued, how much she never realized until it was torn away from her.  Maybe it was the knowledge that she was a virgin, that she had never caved to peer pressure and was saving herself for love.  Maybe it was her private fantasies that one day she would give her purity to the man sitting right behind her.  That was probably what hurt the most.  Even if her wildest dreams came true, and she and Inuyasha married and raised a family together, she would never be able to give him her most cherished gift, the one the Kami gave her as a woman.  She didn’t think Inuyasha was the kind of guy to care about such a thing, not really, but both of them would always know that she in her foolishness had deprived them of a wonderful experience.  Was it a blessing or a curse that she did not remember the unfortunate event?  She couldn’t even remember who the lucky suitor might have been; her memories of the evening stopped with her still at the party, tipping back the last dregs of a jug of sake. 

For the sake of her lover—she blanched at that word—she hoped that Inuyasha was unable to either remember his identity or figure it out through scent.  Though she felt violated, the man had done nothing wrong by the standards of the time.  She could not hold him to the consent laws of the modern era; that wasn’t part of his moral code and it would be unfair to enforce it against him.  Especially when Inuyasha’s brand of ‘justice’ would probably involve some sort of dismemberment, most likely of the body part which had violated her the most. 

She spared a glance over her shoulder to gauge Inuyasha’s mood, and was surprised at what she saw.  She had been hoping not to have to ‘osuwari’ him to save the life of her lover—there was that awful word again—but that appeared to be a baseless concern.  Inuyasha’s head was turned away, his eyes gazing forlornly at the ground.  His countenance spoke of heavy remorse and a healthy amount of self-loathing, but was astonishingly lacking in anger or desire to maim.  Did he feel so guilty himself that he was letting her lov— _consort_ off the hook?  That did not sound like him at all.  The Inuyasha she knew let his guilt turn into rage, fueling him to a frenzy which was woe to anyone else who had wronged her.  So why wasn’t he contemplating the most gruesome way to kill the man who had taken her virginity last night? 

She could admit that she was a little irritated by his lack of spirit.  Perhaps it was shallow, but she wanted him to be pissed off.  She wanted fury to be exuding from every pore in his body, even though she would not let him act on it.  She almost _wanted_ to have to use the ‘osuwari’ command to keep him in check.  At least that meant he cared.  This sad, whipped puppy Inuyasha was disconcerting, like he didn’t give a damn about who she slept with.  Like he was only remorseful because her hangover was so bad.  She was just about give voice to her displeasure when another idea occurred to her.  She had woken up alone on the futon, but Inuyasha had been right there with her.  So either he had already left her consort decaying in a pool of his own blood, or…

She didn’t think it was possible, but her mouth became even drier.  Her stomach roiled fiercely once more, bubbling with conflicting emotions.  She found herself praying with her heart that the answer to her next question was ‘yes,’ and with her rational mind that it was ‘no.’ 

"Inuyasha," she croaked.  His eyes rose to meet hers for the first time, and she gulped at the intensity of his gaze.  "Did we…did we…"

She couldn’t finish.  But fortunately, or unfortunately, he seemed to understand.  Reluctantly, he nodded. 

Kagome leaned forward and heaved what was left of her stomach onto the grass. 

* * *

Inuyasha trudged along at the rear of the group, staring at the dirt road in front of him.  He did not feel up to assuming his normal role as leader of the pack, physically or emotionally.  His hangover was still affecting him, though thankfully its severity had subsided fairly quickly since the morning.  He was still uncomfortable in his own skin, with a strong headache as the primary culprit, but at least he was not too incapacitated to walk or fight if need be.  The weight of his conscience, however, had only grown worse as the day progressed.  He cringed as he recalled the events of the morning. 

The other four members of the group had arrived just as Kagome finished retching for the second time and collapsed into a miserable ball.  Sango and Miroku took one look at them and instantly knew what had happened.  If their state of dress wasn’t indication enough—Inuyasha’s kosode was hanging open at the front and Kagome was still clad in only his haori—the look on the hanyou’s face told them everything they needed to know.  Fortunately, neither had said anything, either in reproach or teasing.  Both would come later, Inuyasha was sure.  But Kagome’s condition had at least put those inevitable conversations on hold.  As for Miroku and Sango, both were slightly pale and appeared a little worse for wear, but otherwise they seemed normal.  Inuyasha didn’t know if anything had happened between or to either of them, and he didn’t ask.  He had more pressing concerns at the moment. 

It absolutely killed him that there was nothing he could do for Kagome.  Even when he had run to the village well and brought her water, she had drunk it too fast and wound up puking again.  Afterwards they had forced her to drink more, over her protests, and she had managed to keep a little down.  He was sure she was still quite dehydrated though.  So was he, for that matter.  But he was hanyou, and could handle it.  Humans were so fragile, and dehydration could quickly become a big problem for them.  He would have to be on high alert to make sure Kagome’s hangover didn’t develop into something worse. 

She was sleeping fitfully now, which was probably the best thing for her.  Sango had helped her clean up a bit and change into a fresh set of pajamas.  They had wanted to let her rest at the village for the day, but Kagome was adamant that they leave immediately.  The thought of remaining there for another second seemed repugnant to her.  As they tried to persuade her and her temper rose, she began to border on incoherency, and none of them wished to push her over something so small.  So they agreed to leave on the condition that Kagome be carried.  Everyone expected her to ride on Kirara, including Inuyasha.  So he was understandably shocked when Kagome instead looked to him and asked if he would carry her.  She probably felt so terrible that she didn’t care that the act of riding on his back should be incredibly awkward right now, for both of them. 

Somehow it wasn’t, at least for him.  Even now, having her nestled against his back, her thighs in his hands, felt amazingly natural.  He would have to savor the sensation of having her so close, because this was probably the last time it would ever happen.  Once she recovered from her hangover, she would likely never permit this level of physical proximity ever again.  And he wouldn’t blame her.  He was a dirtbag, pure and simple.  He deserved whatever punishment she chose to mete out, and more.  Not only had he failed to protect her from drinking herself ill, but he had violated her trust and taken her innocence.  ‘Taken’ wasn’t even a strong enough word for what he had done; he had essentially stolen her virginity like a thief in the night.  And if he hadn’t raped her while she was passed out, then he had almost certainly pressured her into unwanted sex when she was too drunk to refuse. 

That was a very dismal way of looking at things, of course.  He hoped that making such assumptions would prove rash in the end.  In the best case scenario, his and Kagome’s tryst had been an accident in the purest sense of the word, with no greater portion of fault to either side.  He prayed that the truth was close to that extreme, rather than the opposite one.  If his worst fears turned out to be valid…he didn’t know what he would do.  But perhaps his lack of memory was simply causing him to panic and conjure irrational thoughts.  He had never believed himself capable of taking advantage of someone like that.  Could alcohol magically make a person behave in such a way if he had no predispositions toward such behavior while sober?  He knew the mystery surrounding the event was getting to him; he could not help but consider the possibility that deep down he was the monster everyone assumed him to be.  Everyone before Kagome, that is.  The beautiful girl with a bigger heart than anyone he had ever met.  The pure soul he had spoiled with his drunken lust. 

There was his guilty conscience running away with him again.  It really would make more sense to wait and see how Kagome felt about all of this before condemning himself.  But couldn’t help it!  His imagination would not calm until he had talked to her.  He was probably reading too much into the horrified expression on her face as she realized what they had done.  Did that look stem from losing her virginity in the first place, losing it to him, or just because she was about to be sick again?  Afterwards, fatigue had been the primary emotion he could pick up from her.  She had not seemed angry, per se, just exhausted.  And despite the fact that she knew what had happened, she had still asked him to carry her.  That had to mean something, right? 

He sincerely hoped so.  He didn’t want this to be the last time he held her, her body nestled against his own creating the feeling in his heart that all was right with the world.  In the quiet moments they periodically shared, he could forget about Naraku, the Shikon no Tama, and his promises to Kikyou.  He could forget everything except Kagome, her face, her scent, and the knowledge that her desire to be there with him was as strong as his own to have her close.  As he had told her before, he needed her by his side.  ‘By his side,’ not merely meaning a companion on their mission, but someone who would literally stand beside him.  Someone who would take on any challenge with him, support him physically and spiritually, and place more faith and trust in him than he could place in himself.  And he needed the casual physical contact, the seemingly innocuous unnecessary touching that backed up her words—that she did not care if he was a hanyou, that she liked him for who he was.  He trusted Kagome when she told him that, and would always keep those words close to his heart.  But he had been living so long with the beliefs that had been beaten into him as a child—at times literally—that he sometimes found himself doubting the words anyway.  Her touch always reminded him that Kagome was special in this regard; her heart reflected exactly what she said.  No one would allow a hanyou to carry her, or embrace him out of relief, or cry for him, or do any of the hundred other things which were uniquely ‘Kagome,’ unless she truly and completely accepted him for who he was. 

If he lost that, if he lost what made her _Kagome_ …he would lose the best part of himself. 

If there was one thing to regret about last night, this was it.  He was not remorseful for his own sake; he did not feel like he had lost anything by having his first sexual experience be with Kagome.  Who else should he have given his virginity to?  Kikyou?  Having sex with his former love had never been an immediate possibility.  Fifty years ago, he had known better than to even entertain those thoughts until they were both human and wed.  And now, even if she could physically have intercourse in her current body, she would still never lower herself to lying with a hanyou.  Since he wasn’t about to become human for her now, the odds of him and Kikyou ever having sex were miniscule, whether he went to hell with her or not.  He could not say he was disappointed.  He would have loved her in every sense of the word had they been married, but even back then he had never really viewed Kikyou as a potential sexual partner.  He had not been allowed to, not by the world around them, and not by Kikyou herself. 

Beyond all that, what truly shocked him was that he felt no remorse for _Kikyou’s_ sake.  Rationally, even though he and Kikyou were never intimate, he was promised to her and by all rights he should feel guilty for betraying her with Kagome.  Only it didn’t feel like betrayal.  The trust between them had already been broken, in part by Kikyou’s own actions both before and after her resurrection.  Or perhaps it had never been strong to begin with. 

So ultimately, his greatest fear—aside from being revealed as a rapist bastard—was not how Kikyou would react if she ever found out about last night.  It was that he would lose Kagome, _his_ Kagome, his best friend, closest companion and greatest opponent all wrapped into one.  Their relationship would surely change after this; how could it not?  But if she drifted away from him, if she blamed him for this, if she realized that a filthy hanyou with nothing to his name but a rusty sword and the clothes on his back was unworthy of her affections after all…  If she became like Kikyou…

He shuddered, causing the girl on his back to stir slightly.  He tightened his grip on her thighs as she settled back down, drawing courage from the way she muttered his name in slumber.  He resolved to do everything in his power to make sure he and Kagome did not drift apart.  He would fight for her, against her if needed.  If he had to get down on his hands and knees and beg for forgiveness, he would damn well do it.  And if things were awkward between them for a time, that would be no less than he expected.  Slowly but surely, however, things would go back to close to the way they were before that fateful night.  Perhaps they would even be better. 

Now he was being overly optimistic, but it was much more pleasant than his earlier pessimism.  He spent most of the morning and much of the afternoon brooding in silence, arguing with himself in this back-and-forth fashion.  Finally, as the sun was perched about halfway between its apex and its setting place in the western skyline, Kagome lifted her head off his shoulder and groaned.  Without turning around, he could picture her holding her head with a pained grimace marring her features.  His ears swiftly lowered in renewed guilt. 

"Kagome!" Shippou yelled as he came barreling toward them, the first of their companions to realize she was awake thanks to his youkai hearing.  Kagome cringed at the volume of his shout, and Inuyasha would have bopped him if it didn’t mean dislodging his fragile cargo.  Shippou clambered up and perched atop his shoulder, blissfully unaware of the hanyou’s ire, but thankfully he did keep his voice down from then on. 

"Are you okay, Kagome?" 

"A little better, Shippou-chan," Kagome responded after taking a few moments to assess her condition.  "I think I might be done throwing up at least." 

Inuyasha was obviously relieved to hear this; getting covered in Kagome’s vomit was no less than he deserved, but he still hoped to avoid it if he could.  She still sounded pretty miserable though.  He imagined her head was throbbing fiercely, and he knew she was dehydrated and possibly malnourished.  The last thing she had eaten that had actually stayed down had been a rather early dinner last night.  Perhaps it was time to try to get her to munch on something, just to keep her strength up.  She _had_ to drink fluids; there was no arguing that.  He would force her to drink even if she used ‘osuwari’ a hundred times.  Hopefully that could be avoided too.  He was contemplating the best way to approach this delicate issue when the conversation turned in an unfortunate direction. 

"You were asleep for a long time, Kagome," Shippou told her worriedly.  "I thought you were really getting sick." 

"I don’t think so, Shippou-chan.  This is just me recovering from all of that cursed alcohol.  Plus, I guess I didn’t get very much sleep last night." 

Inuyasha stiffened and felt Kagome do the same.  Both immediately blushed hotly, realizing how that comment could be taken by one so inclined.  And unfortunately, they did know someone so inclined.  Apparently now that Kagome wasn’t in such bad shape, she and Inuyasha were ripe for some fully-justified teasing.  But an unexpected savior came to their rescue, with a well-timed elbow under the ribs.  Miroku put on a sheepish grin and shrugged.  He could afford to bide his time.  Sango favored both of them with a look that clearly said ‘you’re welcome’ and changed the subject. 

"Do you think you could eat something, Kagome-chan?  You might feel better after you get some food in your stomach." 

Much to Inuyasha’s surprise, Kagome agreed easily.  They paused in their trek long enough for her to down half a bottle of water and munch on a few crackers from her bag.  Once she was finished, Inuyasha knelt down for her to mount up again, but she expressed a desire to ‘stretch her legs.’  The hanyou shrugged nonchalantly to cover his concern, hoping that the only reason for this change of heart was because Kagome felt guilty for making Miroku and Sango take turns toting her bag around.  When she went to pick it up, however, he quickly snatched it from her grasp and slung if over his own shoulder.  The shy smile she favored him with had him flushing all over again, and he swiftly turned away from her.  He was grateful for the embarrassment, however; that smile had eased the fears of rejection which had arisen after she turned down his offer to carry her. 

A few minutes later, Inuyasha found himself walking at the rear of the group with Miroku, who had drifted back to join him.  Kagome and Sango strode side by side ahead of them, Shippou and Kirara perched atop their respective shoulders.  Inuyasha had taken up the rear position so he could keep an eye on Kagome and make sure she wasn’t wobbly on her feet, but he suspected that the bouzu had less honorable motives.  An intuition confirmed when the monk opened his mouth. 

"A lovely sight, is it not?" he asked quietly, grinning cheerfully with just a hint of lechery. 

Inuyasha rolled his eyes.  He was not in the mood for this, as the bouzu found out when he received another elbow under the ribs for his trouble.  After that, Miroku left him alone.  This was not to say that Inuyasha disputed the man’s point—Kagome and Sango walking in front of them _was_ a rather lovely sight.  He would die before he admitted that aloud though.  This of course did not stop him from admiring the comely vision in passing.  Not staring, certainly not staring.  Was it a blessing or a curse that he could not remember what Kagome looked like during carnal acts?  It was not as though he had failed to appreciate how pleasing to the eye her lithe form and short skirt were before today, but now his attraction seemed stronger somehow.  Another change that should come as no surprise, he supposed.  There was no way in hell he was going to start behaving like the bouzu, so he figured it was nothing to worry about. 

A couple hours later, as Kagome’s pace slowed and her shoulders began to slump, Inuyasha called a halt.  There was still some daylight left, but the ‘weak humans would be no good tomorrow if they didn’t get enough sleep,’ as he so eloquently put it.  For half a heartbeat he feared Kagome was about to ‘osuwari’ him for that, but she swallowed the word and looked away uncomfortably.  That was a little disconcerting to him; it was proof that she was still uncertain about the status of their relationship.  Normally she would use the rosary when he made a thoughtless comment like that, to remind him not to be such an ass all the time.  _Some_ of the time he could admit that he deserved it. 

Kagome went straight to bed after cooking up a light dinner.  For once she joined Inuyasha in eating ramen, since the noodles and broth would be easy on her stomach and she didn’t feel up to chancing anything more substantial yet.  The result was a very quiet campsite, gripped by a subdued sort of silence.  Dusk turned to night, and barely a word was spoken.  The humans and kitsune found ways to keep busy, but Inuyasha merely resumed his earlier brooding.  The darkness seemed to bring out his more negative emotions, his deep-seated insecurities, and his mood soured quickly.  Finally he could stand it no longer.  He rose and stalked out of camp, to relieve himself and perhaps vent his frustrations on a few unfortunate trees along the way. 

He left a trail of scratched bark and scarred trunks in his wake, but he felt no better for it.  He was almost finished emptying his bladder when he sensed a presence approaching behind him, and stifled a snarl.  Briefly he considered simply bolting, but that would be the cowardly way out.  No doubt the bouzu just wanted to tease him a bit.  Inuyasha would put up with it now that they were alone, within reason.  If Miroku pushed him too far, he would regret it. 

"Whaddya want, bouzu?" he demanded impatiently, fastening his hakama and turning to face the lecherous houshi. 

"Hmmm," Miroku considered, frowning in mock concentration.  It was all an act, Inuyasha knew; the jackass had already come up with his first line long ago.  Sometimes he hated being right. 

"Well, first I suppose I should congratulate you," he replied, with a tone that Inuyasha could almost believe was serious.  "Our little Inuyasha has finally become a man." 

"Keh!  I was already twice the man you’ll ever be!" 

"Not in the strictest sense, I’m afraid.  Lying with a woman is something of a rite of passage for boys." 

"Not for me it ain’t," Inuyasha spat bitterly.  "You’re a moron if you think any girl would want to lie with a hanyou." 

Miroku blinked, seemingly surprised by the dark turn in the conversation.  His smile faded, to be replaced by an expression which was all sincerity and friendly concern.  Now Inuyasha really wanted to run away.  A ‘heart to heart’ with Miroku sounded even less appealing than being the butt of his perverted jokes. 

"I must be a moron then," Miroku said quietly.  Inuyasha growled in annoyance as his meaning sunk in; he couldn’t believe the monk was making him explain what should be obvious! 

"Kagome was drunk, you dumbass!  She didn’t know what she was doing.  She…probably thought I was someone else." 

Miroku shook his head and smiled wryly at this.  "Inuyasha, your features are rather…unique.  It would be difficult to confuse you with anyone else.  Besides, you were just as drunk if not more so than she was.  Did you imagine her to be someone else?" he asked, his voice raised slightly in genuine concern. 

"No!" Inuyasha replied vehemently, sickened by the thought of using Kagome in such a way.  "I mean, I don’t think so.  I don’t really…remember what happened," he finished shamefully. 

"You don’t remember?" Miroku repeated.  "Ah…that complicates things." 

"Tell me about it." 

"What do you remember?" 

"I was still at the party, but then the next thing I can remember is waking up this morning next to Kagome." 

"And you’re absolutely certain the two of you…ah, of course, that sensitive nose of yours." 

Inuyasha, whose finger had been tapping said nose meaningfully, now moved the same hand to rub the back of his neck. 

"We definitely ‘did it,’ bouzu.  No freaking doubt about that." 

Miroku couldn’t resist.  "Well, again, I’d like to offer my most heartfelt congratu—"

"Would you shut the fuck up already?!" 

"Oh, lighten up, Inuyasha.  I did not come out here merely to poke fun at you.  I also wished to make sure that your head was in the right place.  Clearly I was right to be concerned." 

"And what the hell is that supposed to mean?" 

"It means, my friend, that you are looking at this all wrong.  What happened last night was clearly a mistake, but it is not something you should torture yourself over.  Do you honestly believe that Kagome-sama will wake up tomorrow and be angry with you?" 

"She should be." 

"That is her decision to make, is it not?  I for one do not believe that she is upset for her own sake.  I am sure she is simply worried about what this means for you and her, and how _you_ feel about it."

"Then she’s a moron, too!" 

Inuyasha knew he was being confrontational, but he didn’t care.  He could hear voices from the past, condemning him, denouncing him as unworthy of love and companionship.  Why couldn’t the monk just give up and leave him alone? 

Miroku sighed and put his head in his hand.  "It would be wise if you did not repeat that in her presence." 

That sent Inuyasha over the edge.  How could Miroku treat him like _he_ was being the foolish one?! 

"Dammit, bouzu!  Don’t you fucking get it?  I took her innocence!  I can never give that back to her!  She should hate me right now!" 

Miroku gazed at him sadly, with a hint of pity.  "Has Kagome-sama not given you so much already?  Do you have any reason to doubt that she will regard her innocence as freely given as well?" 

Inuyasha opened his mouth to retort and shut it just as swiftly.  It was true, he realized; Kagome was incredibly generous.  She had already given him everything he had ever asked of her, even those requests he never gave voice to.  And somehow, she always forgave him no matter how he wronged her.  Would this be any different? 

Seeing that he was getting through to the hanyou, Miroku continued.  "Look, Inuyasha.  Kagome-sama…cares for you.  Very much.  She will not blame you for what happened, nor will it change the way she feels about you.  She values your friendship too much to allow this to ruin it." 

Inuyasha closed his eyes in contemplation.  He wanted to believe Miroku’s words, so badly.  At various points in the day, he had almost believed them.  But the doubts always returned, the haunting memories, the knowledge that he was unworthy of her friendship, no matter what anyone said.  But Kagome didn’t see things that way; her view of the world was downright bizarre.  Perhaps that was why she could accept a lowly hanyou as much as she did.  He wanted to believe Miroku, to trust what he thought he knew about Kagome.  But faith did not come easy for him, and still he wrestled with it. 

"How can you be so sure?" he asked hopefully. 

"Because I know Kagome-sama," Miroku answered resolutely, without a trace of uncertainty.  "And because ever since I have known the two of you, I have observed the growth of your relationship from the outside.  Being in the middle of a relationship can be blinding, but watching from out here is often quite enlightening." 

His words were a soothing balm over Inuyasha’s heart, and the hanyou felt much of the tension ebb from his body.  But there was one stubborn fear that still gripped him. 

"But I don’t remember what happened.  What if I…you know…"

Miroku could guess what the hanyou was thinking from the devastated expression on his face, and had to forcefully suppress the desire to whack him over the head with his staff.  Inuyasha had a good heart, but sometimes he was so damn foolish. 

"Inuyasha," he began with forced patience, "would you take advantage of Kagome-sama in such a way if you were sober?"  His only response was an appalled look from the hanyou.  "Of course not.  In my experience, alcohol does not make one do anything he would normally consider repugnant.  Under normal circumstances, you would rather kill yourself than force Kagome-sama into anything against her will.  Drinking too much alcohol would not magically turn you into a rapist." 

Inuyasha could hear the frustration in Miroku’s tone.  _He really thinks I’m a baka for asking that question._   Maybe he was.  The monk certainly had more experience with alcohol than he did.  Perhaps it was okay to trust Miroku’s judgment on this one, until he was proven incorrect?  Finally, Inuyasha relaxed, all of the air leaving his lungs in a huge sigh.  He was emotionally drained, and more than a little embarrassed by his behavior.  Not to mention grateful to Miroku, who had gone above and beyond the bounds of friendship to talk some sense into a stubborn hanyou. 

"Besides," the monk stated in an amused tone that had Inuyasha tensing all over again.  "Kagome-sama was probably just as into the act as you were." 

As if hearing Miroku make that statement wasn’t shocking enough, he delivered it without any indication that he was joking.  But he couldn’t possibly be serious…could he? 

"K-Kagome’s not like that!" 

"Like what?  There is nothing wrong with sexual desire, Inuyasha.  Kagome-sama may seem innocent, and in many ways she is.  But she is also a rapidly maturing young woman.  Trust me, at that age, she has had those kinds of urges before.  Perhaps even concerning a certain handsome hanyou I know…" 

"S-s-shut up!  Don’t bullshit me!" 

"Do I look like I am anything less than completely serious?" 

"You’re gonna look black and blue in a second!" 

That retort sounded lame even to Inuyasha’s ears, but Miroku let him off with a light chuckle.  "Well, it is good to see you acting like your old self again." 

"Keh!" 

With that, Inuyasha strode past Miroku back in the direction of camp, leaving the monk to hurry in his wake. 

"Just one last piece of advice, Inuyasha."  The hanyou grunted but didn’t move to physically injure him, so Miroku continued.  "Talk to her.  I mean _really_ talk to her.  The two of you desperately need to clear the air." 

As daunting as that prospect was, Inuyasha knew he was right.  The only way to know for sure how Kagome felt was to ask her.  He gulped.  At least he could put that off until tomorrow.  What he couldn’t put off was the expression of gratitude he knew Miroku honestly deserved.  So just before they returned to camp, he stopped and spoke softly over his shoulder, without turning around. 

"Oi, Miroku." 

"Yes, Inuyasha?" 

"Thanks." 

The monk chuckled.  "Any time, my friend.  Any time." 


	3. Clearing the Air

Kagome sat up and stretched, extending her arms above her head with a small squeak of satisfaction.  She rolled her head from side to side, working the stiffness from her neck.  Finally she looked around the campsite, blinking the sleep from her eyes.  She was surprised to learn that the sun had not yet risen; the pre-dawn morning still lingered in shades of gray.  It was odd for her to be awake at this hour, and even more unusual for her to be relatively alert rather than lethargic.  But given the amount of time she had spent sleeping over the past thirty-six hours, she supposed it should come as no surprise. 

She was exceedingly grateful to feel like her old self again.  Yesterday had been awful, plain and simple.  Even near dusk, as her headache started to fade away, her exhaustion had penetrated to her very bones.  Apparently a long, peaceful night’s sleep had done wonders for her hangover.  That, and a lengthy nap during the day, courtesy of Inuyasha’s tender care.  Inuyasha…just thinking of him threatened to turn her insides into a jumbled mess.  He was up there in the canopy somewhere, she knew.  Probably awake, though no one else was.  Resolved not to rouse her other friends, Kagome settled back down into her sleeping bag.  She had plenty to occupy her thoughts. 

Once again she drifted back to the events of two evenings prior, trying to remember what had transpired after she and Inuyasha went off together.  No such luck; the recollections she sought had either been wiped out by the alcohol or locked away very tightly.  It was incredibly disappointing.  Whereas yesterday morning she had experienced a sense of emptiness when she thought she had given her virginity to another man, now she felt a certain void within her for an entirely different reason.  Whether or not their tryst had been a mistake, whether or not one or both of them regretted it, she would have loved to be able to hold the memories of her and Inuyasha’s first time together.  She was missing out on something she would have cherished, and it weighed heavily on her heart. 

At least, she thought she would have cherished it.  She couldn’t imagine the sex had been very elegant with as drunk as they were, or physically pleasing, but neither of those things mattered to her.  The closeness was what would warm her heart, the way he stared adoringly down at her as he moved within her, the sound of her name upon his lips as he became immersed in his pleasure.  At least, that was what she dreamed it would be like—like making love, rather than simply having sex.  In her fantasies, Inuyasha was gentle, calm and composed, and passionate…so passionate that even the slow, languid lovemaking drove her to dizzying heights of ecstasy.  Given the amount of alcohol involved, reality was probably a far cry from her imagination.  Still, even if he had gotten caught up in the moment and simply taken his pleasure, in a matter of seconds rather than minutes, she wouldn’t hold it against him as long as his heart belonged completely to her in those moments. 

The obvious extension of this thought was rather depressing—what if his heart had _not_ belonged to her?  But she shook those gloomy considerations away.  The Inuyasha she knew and loved would never knowingly use her as a replacement for Kikyou, and he had not mistaken her for the other miko since the day they first met.  Still, Kagome could not banish the persistent doubts completely, especially because alcohol was involved.  If Inuyasha became intoxicated enough, he probably could have imagined that he was sleeping with Kikyou.  But ‘probably could have’ and ‘probably did’ were two entirely different things, and she would not assume the latter where the only evidence at hand pointed to the former.  She had always tried to give Inuyasha the benefit of the doubt where Kikyou was concerned, because she was his first love, one of the few lights in an otherwise dark and tragic past.  The once bright gleam of their love had dimmed through mistrust and betrayal, but Kagome had long ago accepted the permanent place Kikyou would always hold within his heart. 

This of course was another source of concern for the young miko.  Inuyasha took his responsibilities toward Kikyou very seriously, as evidenced by his spotless record of going to see her whenever she was near.  Even when presented with evidence of the undead miko’s bitterness and malicious actions, he always defended her.  Inuyasha was honorable to a fault when it came to his devotion to Kikyou, and that was what frightened Kagome.  Would he feel that lying with another, Kikyou’s own reincarnation no less, had besmirched the honor he held so dear? 

If the answer was ‘yes,’ then everything was about to change.  If Inuyasha felt that he had betrayed Kikyou, he would push the catalyst for that betrayal away.  The gradual growth of their relationship would come to an abrupt halt, the casual ease of their interactions of late to be replaced by uncomfortable formality.  He would never again open up to her, or share some hidden piece of himself which he kept concealed from the rest of the world.  In essence, the close friendship they had painstakingly built would be crushed; they would be reduced to nothing more than mere traveling companions. 

Obviously, Kagome would be beyond devastated if this ever came to pass.  She blinked back tears, resolving again not to jump to conclusions.  Inuyasha had surprised her in the past with the depth of his heart.  She had come to cautiously believe that there was room in there for both her and Kikyou.  Inuyasha was not a man to wear his emotions on his sleeve, except during a confrontation.  But he was a deep individual, capable of a wide range of feelings and more than able to love, with an intensity which probably frightened him.  She would have to put her faith in him, to trust that he valued their friendship as much as she did.  Perhaps he was dealing with the same inner conflict as she was, more worried about her reaction than his own.  If so, she knew they could work this out.  Things would never go back to exactly the way they had been, but they could be best friends again. 

And perhaps more?  Kagome sincerely hoped that her fantasies could remain within the bounds of possibility.  If anything, the knowledge that she had slept with Inuyasha only made her love him more intensely.  Even if the circumstances were less than ideal, one of her private dreams had been fulfilled.  Indeed, her heart rejoiced uninhibitedly; it was only her mind which hesitated.  And that solely because she worried about how he would feel.  She would never regret sharing her first time with Inuyasha for her own sake. 

Smiling softly, she pushed aside her fears and allowed herself to slip into sweet daydreams. 

* * *

Kagome frowned at Inuyasha’s back for the umpteenth time since they left camp.  Something was…off with him today.  It was now early afternoon, and the hanyou hadn’t said more than five words to any of them since daybreak.  This was decidedly antisocial behavior, even for him.  It would make sense if he was mad at her for the other night, but Kagome could detect no anger from him.  Rather than cold, he seemed merely distracted.  Whenever someone tried to talk to him, it would take him a couple seconds to realize he had been spoken to, and even then he would only grunt a monosyllabic response.  He seemed, for lack of a better phrase, like a man on a mission.  Kagome was more than a little curious as to what exactly his objective was, but since he appeared to be in a decent enough mood she left him alone. 

Suddenly he stopped dead in his tracks, head turned to the side and nose sniffing deeply.  The victorious smirk he adopted next was a little scary. 

"Heh, I knew I remembered there being one around here!" he muttered to himself.  Then he turned briefly to the rest of the group, leaving them with a "wait here" command before launching himself into the forest which began several meters off the road.  The other five members of the Inu-gang could only look at each other in confusion. 

"Nobody has any idea what he’s up to?" Kagome tried, though she thought she knew the answer already.  She got the response she expected, with the rest of her companions shaking their heads. 

"I haven’t the foggiest idea," Sango declared. 

"Perhaps finally being with a woman has left him mentally unbalanced in some way," Miroku speculated, throwing Kagome a wink.  The miko immediately blushed as red as a tomato and covered her face with her hands.   

"Houshi-sama!" 

"I am being completely serious, Sango," Miroku assured, backing away from the outraged taijiya with raised hands.  "When a man abstains for so long, then releases all of that pent up sexual energy at once, there have to be some unexpected consequences." 

Sango hesitated; his words did make sense in a perverse sort of way.  For just a moment she considered the possibility that he was being genuine.  She should have known better. 

"Or perhaps he’s snapped completely and turned into a sex fiend.  Kagome-sama, we may need you to—"

*Bonk*

"Ah, Sango…I was only giving my professional analysis of Inuyasha’s mental state." 

Sango scoffed.  "You were being a hentai.  Stop teasing Kagome-chan." 

"Yes, my lady." 

"And don’t call me that!" 

Kagome, who had been silently willing the ground to open up and swallow her throughout this conversation, finally relaxed once the topic shifted away from her sex life.  It seemed pretty ludicrous to her that Inuyasha was suffering from anything akin to ‘blue balls withdrawal syndrome.’  She was not, however, able to resist imagining what the hanyou would be like as a ‘sex fiend.’  A delightful shiver passed through her body, from her head down to her toes.  She was sure she would enjoy a hentai Inuyasha very much. 

Fortunately, said hanyou returned to them moments later, before she could delve too deeply into the fantasy.  So to her eternal gratitude, no one ever noticed her distraction or guessed the reason behind it. 

"This way, you lot," Inuyasha proclaimed excitedly, setting off at a brisk pace into the forest.  His friends had to hurry to keep up with him, and before long Kagome felt her ire rising.  Whatever he was leading them to, it had better be worth all this aggravation…

The sight which greeted her when Inuyasha finally brought them to a halt stunned her into speechlessness.  It was a small hot spring, the steam beckoning seductively as it floated off the clear, gently bubbling water.  _This must be what desert travelers feel when they see an oasis.  Not quite sure it’s real…but_ really _wanting it to be._  

There was no way she could imagine the look of pride and self-satisfaction on Inuyasha’s face though.  Nor the exquisite feeling of the warm water when she knelt down and slipped her hand in.  Eventually, she sat back on her heels and gazed wordlessly up at him, tears shining in her eyes.  For him to go out of his way to do something nice for her, after what had happened, was truly touching. 

He seemed to lose all of his bravado when he met her gaze.  He stuttered awkwardly, shifting from one foot to the other, eyes skirting everywhere except her as he rubbed the back of his neck anxiously.  Kagome beamed at him.  _Typical Inuyasha.  He’ll do something nice for you, but when you thank him or ask him to explain, he’ll get all embarrassed._   She found his discomfiture incredibly endearing.  He hadn’t sought out this hot spring to win her gratitude, or the admiration of their friends, or for any other selfish reason.  He had done it solely because he wanted her to be happy.  He would never know how much that meant to her. 

Finally, he managed to find his voice.  "I, uh, thought maybe you could use—I mean, I thought you might _want_ a bath." 

Kagome’s smile widened at his shy admission.  She didn’t even mind his near slip.  She certainly did want a bath, and she most desperately needed one as well.  Sango had helped her clean up yesterday morning, but nothing but a true bath could completely cleanse the sweat and lingering stench of vomit from her skin.  Maybe Inuyasha had caught her sniffing herself or sighing wistfully this morning as she thought about a long soak in her bathtub at home.  The hot spring would be even better; if there was ever a time for ‘girl talk’ with Sango, it was now.  So she knew Inuyasha had not been driven by a desire to improve her body odor.  If that were the case, he would have tossed her in that pond they had walked by this morning.  That non-steamy, _cold_ pond.  This hot spring, on the other hand, was something she would enjoy immensely, which she was confident had been his goal the entire time. 

In a flash she was up and pressed against him, her arms wrapped around his back in a tight embrace.  He sucked in a full lungful of air in shock, and for a heartbeat Kagome questioned the wisdom of her action.  But when he relaxed somewhat and hesitantly held her to him with one arm draped loosely over her shoulders, she was reduced to burying her face in his haori and holding back joyous tears. 

"Wow, Inuyasha, I’m impressed," Sango observed.  "How did you know this place was here?" 

"Keh.  I passed this way a few years before I was sealed, and I thought I remembered bathing in a spring.  I’m just glad the spring didn’t dry up after fifty-something years." 

"Indeed, Inuyasha, it was incredibly kind of you to seek out this spring for Kagome-sama," Miroku remarked with a teasing air.  "But lest we forget, ‘there’s a lot of daylight left.’  You wouldn’t want us ‘lazy’ humans ‘taking half a day off,’ now would you?" 

Kagome giggled at that, pulling back from Inuyasha enough to tilt her head and peer up at him with one eye.  She knew Miroku was just parroting back at Inuyasha some of the very phrases the hanyou had used against them in the past.  Evidently Inuyasha got the joke as well, because he took it in stride. 

"Shut up, bouzu.  We can stop early this _one time._   Tomorrow we’re back to normal." 

With one final squeeze to show him that she didn’t mind this arrangement, Kagome released Inuyasha and hopped over to her bag to gather her bathing supplies.  She hummed softly to herself as she went about the task, practically giddy with excitement. 

"I think you boys had better leave before she starts undressing," Sango told them jokingly.  She had meant it purely as a jest, but quickly realized how even that comment could be taken by one so inclined.  Inuyasha’s small gasp and the lecherous smirk Miroku shot her certainly helped in that regard. 

"Don’t say anything, Houshi-sama!" she ordered, and this time the monk wisely complied.  Lost in her own world, Kagome fortunately missed the entire exchange.  She did not, however, miss Shippou’s surprised yelp as Inuyasha grabbed him by the tail and began carrying him away from the spring. 

"Put me down, Inuyasha!  I wanna take a bath, too!" 

"Nope, you’re coming with us, runt.  I’m sure the women want to talk about _female_ stuff.  That’s shit no guy needs to hear." 

He said it with a healthy helping of disdain, but Kagome was in too good a mood to ‘osuwari’ him for it.  And he was right; she did want to discuss certain things with Sango that Shippou should not hear.  As soon as the guys were out of sight she began removing her clothes, tossing them into a pile instead of neatly laying them out or folding them as she normally would.  She was anticipating the sensation of that glorious water enveloping her skin too much to bother with such niceties. 

It was as delightful as she imagined, and she closed her eyes and sank into a brief state of heavenly bliss.  What little soreness remained in her muscles was quickly banished.  Eventually she knew she would have to retrieve her soap and shampoo and actually bathe, but for now she just wanted to soak.  She heard Sango sigh in contentment as she lowered herself into the spring across from her, and flashed the taijiya a wry smile. 

"We should do this more often, Sango-chan.  It’s nice enjoying a hot spring in the middle of the day." 

"Tch.  Don’t get used to it.  Inuyasha will never let us do it again," Sango replied light-heartedly, but Kagome’s mood turned contemplative.  What had Inuyasha said?  ‘Tomorrow we’re back to normal?’  _If only that were true._   Inuyasha had only meant that their traveling schedule would return to its customary routine, but there was one big elephant in the room which still needed to be addressed.  Somehow, Kagome couldn’t quite believe that things would ever be truly normal again. 

"Kagome-chan?  Are you okay?" 

Sango’s query startled Kagome from her musings.  "Huh?  Oh, I’m fine, Sango-chan.  The hangover has basically worn off." 

"Well, I’m glad, but that’s not what I meant.  Are you okay…with Inuyasha?" 

Kagome bit her lip.  That was a much more complicated question; she had been thinking about it all morning and still had no answers. 

"I don’t know, Sango-chan.  I hope we are, but that’s kind of up to him." 

"Because you don’t regret it," Sango replied.  It was not a question, but Kagome confirmed with a shake of her head.  "And you’re just worried about how he’ll feel about it."  At Kagome’s nod, Sango sighed.  "You know what you have to do now, right Kagome-chan?  Inuyasha’s too much of a coward to ever bring it up, so if you want to talk to him about it, you’ll have to start the conversation.  I would do it soon.  The more you let this drag on, the more awkward it will get, and the more we’ll all have to deal with Houshi-sama’s antics." 

Kagome cringed; none of that sounded pleasant.  She knew Sango was right.  She and Inuyasha desperately needed to talk, and the hanyou had never shown the intestinal fortitude to initiate this kind of conversation before.  She recalled the time not so long ago, when she had nearly stopped journeying to the feudal era altogether.  The only reason they were still together was because she had put aside her feelings of jealousy and asked if she could remain by his side, despite his commitments to Kikyou.  And those same commitments were one of the primary reasons they needed to talk in the first place. 

She heard Sango muttering under her breath.  The slayer’s irritation was palpable, and Kagome was unsure whom it was directed toward.  A rather disturbing thought occurred to her. 

"Sango-chan…you don’t think I _should_ regret what happened, do you?" 

Sango blinked at her, seemingly surprised by the question.  Then she shrugged casually.  "Not really.  It’s not like you had…relations with some random guy.  Inuyasha is special to you.  Doing that sort of thing with a man before marriage is frowned upon in this day and age, but it happens.  Even in a very traditional village like mine, I remember growing up and hearing rumors about what older boys and girls would sometimes do.  So it’s probably a temptation that most young people have to deal with at one time or another.  And _then_ you have charming lechers roaming the countryside, preying on unsuspecting girls!  Makes me glad I didn’t have time for any of that nonsense.  Training to become a taijiya was hard, but it had its advantages." 

Kagome, though immensely relieved that Sango apparently did not think less of her for her indiscretion, could not fail to notice the direction in which the slayer’s speech had turned.  She never did find out how Sango’s evening had gone…

"So you think Miroku-sama is charming now?" she teased. 

Sango choked and sputtered, blushing deeply.  "I-I never said that!  I…uh, what I meant was that naïve young girls might _think_ a lecher like him was charming only because they don’t know any better." 

"Ohhhh, I see," Kagome drawled, smiling knowingly. 

"It’s the truth!" Sango exclaimed, more than a hint of desperation in her tone. 

"Oh, of _course._   I believe you, Sango-chan." 

The slayer harrumphed at this and crossed her arms over her chest.  Kagome had to giggle; her friend did not pout often, but this was definitely one of those times. 

"You know, Sango-chan, you never told me what happened that night with you and Miroku-sama." 

Kagome did not know what reaction she’d been expecting from Sango, but it was not the soft smile the other woman couldn’t quite manage to hold back.  And when she spoke, her excitement also shone through despite her best efforts.   

"Well, it was…interesting, I’ll say that.  You _know_ he surrounded himself with a small harem of serving girls.  But then, he didn’t really _do_ much of anything.  He flirted quite a bit and propositioned some of them.  But even then, I never felt like he really wanted to take a girl to bed with him.  It seemed like he was just enjoying himself at the celebration.  He kept his hands to himself, and—"

"What?!  He didn’t grope anyone?!"  Kagome found that nearly unbelievable.  But she had no doubt that Sango had been watching the wayward houshi like a hawk, so it must be true.  _Hm, maybe alcohol has the reverse effect on Miroku-sama.  He’s already a lecher when he’s sober, so maybe drinking makes his behavior_ less _perverted?_   More likely, and much more appealingly to Kagome, the monk had simply not wanted to hurt Sango by engaging in such behavior in front of her.  She knew they cared for each other, but to what extent was a frustrating gray area.  For example, if Sango had been leagues away and knew nothing about the celebration, would Miroku’s attitude have changed?  Would he have bedded one or more of the girls, assuming they were willing?  When push came to shove, Kagome hoped the monk would choose Sango, but temptation was a strong force—obviously—and she honestly was not sure how that situation would play out.  For now, she was glad that Miroku had at least shown some sign of curbing his bad habits in Sango’s presence. 

"I know, I couldn’t believe it either," the slayer told her eagerly.  "But he really didn’t grope anyone.  Well…not until we were walking to our rooms to go to sleep…and I let my guard down." 

Kagome laughed merrily at this, and even Sango had to chuckle.  Miroku had groped her literally dozens of times since they first met, but still the monk managed to catch her by surprise almost every time.  For once, Kagome was glad he had done it.  Rather than contracting some sort of strange temporary illness which completely shut down sexual libido, this indicated that Miroku had truly restrained himself in a situation in which he would certainly have _not_ done so before meeting Sango.  The fact that he could keep his hands off of other women was not something to be lauded, but it was a step in the right direction. 

"That’s great, Sango-chan.  I’m glad…"  _I’m glad that night was a positive development for at least one of our relationships._

Sango, sensing the abrupt shift in her friend’s mood, lowered her head in shame.  "Kagome-chan, I’m really sorry." 

"Huh?  For what?" 

"For not sticking by you that night," Sango told her.  When Kagome opened her mouth to protest, the slayer cut her off.  "No, please.  I knew you and Inuyasha had too much to drink, but I was too worried about Houshi-sama and myself to consider what might happen.  Us women have to watch out for each other in situations like that.  I was a terrible friend.  I’m _really_ sorry." 

"Don’t blame yourself, Sango-chan," Kagome replied, feeling genuine sympathy for her guilt-stricken companion, who appeared to be on the verge of tears.  "I knew it was a bad idea for me to start drinking, but I did it anyway.  If this turns out to be a total disaster, then it will be totally my fault." 

"Ch-cheer up, Kagome-chan!" Sango tried, seeing that the younger girl was about to start crying herself.  "It will work out!  Maybe this will knock some sense into Inuyasha.  Maybe he’ll realize that he’s in love with you." 

Kagome didn’t think that even Sango truly believed Inuyasha would have that sort of magical epiphany, but she appreciated the sentiment nonetheless.  Sniffling, she dried her eyes and managed a watery smile. 

"Thanks, Sango-chan." 

Sango nodded.  "And if Inuyasha _is_ mad about what happened, just tell me and I’ll beat some sense into him.  It was more his fault than yours.  He must have drunk enough to kill three grown men." 

Kagome grinned at the memory.  "How did that poor man ever think he was going to beat Inuyasha in a drinking contest?" 

"Tch.  Men don’t use common sense, Kagome-chan.  They’re hyper-competitive, and they like to come up with excuses to drink too much and make complete asses of themselves.  The fact that Inuyasha was a hanyou probably made that fool want to beat him even more." 

It was true, Kagome reflected.  Even in the warm and welcoming atmosphere of the celebration, no one could ignore the fact that Inuyasha was not human.  She had learned that prejudice against hanyou took a variety of forms, and could lurk under the surface even within seemingly kind and open-minded individuals.  This thought brought a disturbing doubt to her mind, and she gazed at Sango thoughtfully.  She was almost positive she knew the answer to her next question, but she had to be sure. 

"Sango-chan, you don’t have a problem with me being with Inuyasha like that, do you?" 

Sango glared at her.  "Of course not!" she snapped, her tone indicating that she was mildly offended.  "If I did, I would have told you long before you developed strong feelings for him.  Growing up in my village and living with Kirara, I learned not to judge anyone by how much youkai blood they have.  Inuyasha is a good man, for the most part.  You know, aside from being a two-timing jerk." 

It occurred to Kagome that of all the times Inuyasha had been accused of two-timing, this was the first time he was actually guilty of it according to the truest definition of the phrase.  And if anyone in their twisted love triangle had a better case to argue that she was being two-timed, it was now Kikyou.  That Inuyasha would realize this and feel remorse for Kikyou’s sake was one of Kagome’s greatest fears.  But for now, her primary concern had to be the fact that Sango was annoyed with her. 

"I’m sorry, Sango-chan.  That was insensitive of me." 

The slayer sighed.  "It’s okay, Kagome-chan.  You were right to worry.  It would be best not to tell a lot of people about this.  Those who know the two of you well will understand, but others…  At first, they’ll think that Inuyasha forced you or put a spell on you, but once they realize neither of those are true, they’ll think you’re a…uh, well…"

"A whore?" Kagome finished.  Sango’s grimace confirmed her guess.  Kagome felt her skin flush, a righteous anger rising within her.  _So in this world, anyone who sleeps with a hanyou is automatically a whore?_   What a cruel, unfair place to live.  And Inuyasha had been dealing with this garbage his whole life?  Her ire only grew as she considered what her hanyou must have been through. 

"R-r-relax, Kagome-chan!" Sango soothed, knowing how formidable her friend’s temper could be when she lost control of it.  "Don’t worry about those ignorant people.  No one whose opinion you care about thinks less of you and Inuyasha for loving each other." 

Kagome took a deep breath, forcing herself to calm down.  Inuyasha had always been surrounded by prejudice on all sides, but no longer.  One of the things she was most proud of was that she had never rejected his youkai half.  Now he had her by his side, and other friends who accepted him for who he was.  He had people he could turn to when the bigotry of the world became too much, people who would make him feel better about himself even though he would never admit he was hurting.  Kagome had vowed long ago to be his rock, as long as he needed her.  It was a vow she kept to this day.  And with that comforting thought, her fury finally left her. 

For the next few minutes the two women settled into companionable silence, as they took turns using the soap and shampoo to wash up.  Sango seemed to be deep in contemplation, so Kagome left her to it.  Finally, when both of them were clean and sitting quietly in the spring once more, the slayer spoke up. 

"Kagome-chan…w-what’s it like?" 

Sango was sporting a healthy blush, and Kagome felt her own cheeks heat to match.  But instead of stuttering in embarrassment, she simply sighed miserably.  There was nothing to stutter over, after all. 

"I really wish I could tell you, Sango-chan.  But I don’t remember any of it." 

"You don’t?  Wow…that’s—"

"It sucks, Sango-chan." 

"Well, maybe you’ll remember eventually.  Memory loss isn’t always permanent." 

Kagome nodded; that was her only hope of ever remembering her and Inuyasha’s first time together.  If they became a couple and had more intimate moments, she wouldn’t care so much about not remembering that night.  But if that proved to be the only time she and Inuyasha ever shared themselves with each other in such a manner, she knew the blackout would haunt her until the day she died. 

They spent a few more quiet minutes in the spring before Sango got out and began drying off. 

"Are you coming, Kagome-chan?" she asked, noticing that the miko seemed to be considering something. 

"No, I…can you do me a favor, Sango-chan?"

The slayer grinned.  "Want me to ask Inuyasha to come see you?"

Kagome nodded nervously.  "Thanks, Sango-chan." 

"Sure thing.  I’ll tell him not to procrastinate either." 

Sango waited until Kagome was dried off and in the process of dressing herself before departing.  The last thing she and Inuyasha needed right now was another awkward moment.  When she was fully clothed, Kagome sat down on a flat rock at the edge of the spring, facing the flickering glow of the campfire.  Trying to slow the rapid beating of her heart, she waited. 

He did not take as long in coming as she had anticipated.  But when he emerged from behind a tree and stepped into the clearing, time itself seemed to freeze.  His appearance was the same as always, from the tips of his ears to his bare toes.  Kagome had never seen him carry himself in this manner, however.  The best description she could come up with for his demeanor was that of a condemned man walking to his own execution.  His expression was guarded, giving nothing away.  But his eyes, always expressive, spoke of veiled fears and stubborn hope.  It gave her courage, the way he held himself.  She imagined her own eyes reflected the same emotions back at him. 

Silence reigned for long, uncomfortable moments.  Kagome scrambled for something to say, anything to break the oppressive mood.  The soft bubbling of the hot spring behind her provided inspiration for a safe icebreaker. 

"So…I never formally thanked you for leading us to this spring.  Thank you, Inuyasha."

"K-keh," the hanyou muttered, looking away from her in embarrassment.  "It was nothing." 

Once again, silence settled over the pair.  Kagome grimaced.  _Nice icebreaker, Kagome.  We managed to talk for a whole five seconds.  Now what?_   Should she just jump right into the crucial topic, the one which was clearly on both of their minds?  Inuyasha had come at her behest, but she didn’t want to scare him off by bringing up the other night before he was ready.  If he got anxious, he might close himself off and they would accomplish nothing.  So then should she try to make more small talk?  Inuyasha was not a huge fan of talk in general, never mind small talk.  Was there even a right way to approach this, or was she simply searching for the best of a bunch of bad options? 

"Kagome…"

His voice startled her from her musings, and she glanced up to find him staring at her intently.  She held her breath, entranced by the intensity of his gaze.  He swallowed hard, a great inner battle waging in his golden orbs.  But whatever he glimpsed as their gazes were locked together seemed to give him courage.  Finally, after a small eternity of delay, he cleared his throat and spoke. 

"Kagome, about the other night…uh…"

His fragile courage deserted him after that, but it was enough.  Those four simple words told Kagome everything she needed to know.  He was ready to talk about what had happened; he wouldn’t back down or run away.  It was time.  She knew exactly what she needed to say, and now she had the confidence to do it. 

"Inuyasha, I’m so, so sorry.  I never meant to put you in that position.  I never—I shouldn’t have—ugh, I’m such a baka.  I’m really sorry." 

Kagome sniffled, annoyed with herself for crying so easily.  But the act of apologizing to Inuyasha had brought all of her insecurities to the surface again.  Her heart was lying on the ground between them; it was up to Inuyasha whether to pick it up and return it to her, or stomp it into mush. 

For half a heartbeat, Inuyasha had been absolutely crushed.  Kagome regretted it after all, that she had gotten drunk and slept with a hanyou.  In that moment, his strongest desire had been to crawl into a cave somewhere and die.  But then she kept talking, and his sorrow dissolved in favor of confusion.  If she was merely expressing her regret over sleeping with him, then the rest of her statement made no sense.  And now that he thought about it, her tone of voice was all wrong as well.  And were those tears?  Why on earth was she crying?  None of this made any sense! 

Gradually, the pieces came together for our bewildered hanyou.  Kagome’s behavior still made no logical sense, but it fit perfectly with her personality.  Even so, this was beyond anything he could have imagined.  He knew Kagome was selfless, but to this insane degree?  To only worry about how he felt about what happened, never mind that it was his damn fault to begin with.  For her to care so much about him, and so little about herself.  It was incredibly humbling, and an indescribable warmth blossomed in his chest.  But still, this could not stand.  Kagome’s feelings on the matter, while truly generous and noble, were absolutely ridiculous.  And he knew they would make no progress whatsoever until he corrected her misunderstanding. 

"Kagome, why the hell are _you_ apologizing to _me_?" 

She looked at him like he had two heads, as though she was shocked that he needed an explanation.  That was perhaps the most amazing thing of all.  She wasn’t even trying to be selfless; it was just who she was. 

"B-because, I made you do something you didn’t want.  I…I made you betray Kikyou." 

Inuyasha nearly toppled over in shock.  _What?!  Where the fuck did she get that idea?!_   And why did he suddenly feel so guilty?  Deep in the most remote corner of his mind, a voice whispered.  _Because you make her feel so insecure about Kikyou, you ass._   In the blink of an eye, his guilt turned to irritation.  It was mostly directed inward, but he certainly had no problem venting it outwardly. 

"First of all, wench, you didn’t _make_ me do anything.  It was me making you do something that _you_ didn’t want." 

As it always did, Kagome’s ire rose to match his own.  "You’re wrong," she told him firmly, drying her eyes furiously with the back of her hand.  "It was my fault." 

"No, it was mine!" 

"I said you’re wrong!" 

"Why, do you remember?" 

"No, do you?" 

"No!" 

The combatants froze mid-utterance at this revelation, both recoiling contemplatively.  Each had wondered privately if the other retained a memory of the event, so neither was too surprised.  For Kagome, his insistence that he was the aggressor meant nothing.  Whenever any harm came to her, Inuyasha always blamed himself.  And he took it hard.  He was just falling into an old pattern here, without really thinking his words through.  And she was tired of fighting with him on this. 

"It doesn’t matter," she said quietly.  "Whether you started it or I did, I still made you betray—"

"Don’t say it," he ordered, stunning her into silence.  He couldn’t stand to hear her give voice to that idiotic assumption again.  Especially because said idiocy was entirely his fault.  No matter what else took place this evening, he had to remedy this one insecurity above all else. 

"Kikyou…has nothing to do with this," he declared resolutely.  Kagome gasped but said nothing, so he continued.  "I owe Kikyou my life, but that doesn’t mean I can’t _live_ while I’m alive.  I…I didn’t make that promise."  He had said what he needed to say, but he plowed on, driven by the awed expression on her face and the swelling of his own heart.  "I don’t remember that night.  But, I know I wasn’t thinking of Kikyou.  And I didn’t want to.  Kagome, you’re not Kikyou.  I don’t _want_ you to be Kikyou.  Kagome is Kagome, and no one else." 

He nearly choked on his own graceless tongue toward the end, but somehow managed to finish.  He was gratified when Kagome burst into tears and leaned forward with her face in her hands.  He was by her side before he even realized it, pulling her to him.  She leaned bonelessly into him, burying her face in his chest as sobs wracked her thin frame.  He rubbed her back, much as he had done two mornings prior.  And as her tears subsided, her sobs winding down to occasional shudders, all of the tension left his body.  He tilted his head back, grinning up at the heavens.  It was in this wonderful moment that he finally knew they would be okay. 

That said, they weren’t done talking, not by a long shot.  He was still in awe of her, the generous spirit which had captivated him long ago.  And as happy as he was, he didn’t hesitate to let her know it. 

"I still can’t believe you’re not mad at me," he told her, a hint of wonder coloring his tone. 

"Why would I be made at you?" she asked, looking up at him with genuine confusion. 

Inuyasha shook his head and wondered how a worthless hanyou had gotten so lucky.  _She doesn’t even consider the possibility that I took advantage of her_.  Was her faith in him that strong, or did she have another reason for her belief?  Miroku’s words came back to him: ‘Trust me, at that age, she has had those kinds of urges before.  Perhaps even concerning a certain handsome hanyou I know…’  He blushed at the memory.  He hadn’t really believed it at the time, but maybe the lecher was right.  Perhaps Kagome did find him attractive in more than a passing observation kind of way.  Perhaps she even desired him.  He found these thoughts to be disturbingly pleasing, and not in a purely physical sense.  I was never purely physical with Kagome.  She could make his heart beat quicker than any enemy alive with just a smile, but she also warmed him in an entirely spiritual way.  She was the balm that healed his wounded heart, the only one who could soothe his rebellious soul.  She was his first true friend, the one he still relied on above all others.  And it was truly amazing to know that despite what had happened, their relationship was not going to deteriorate.  It was, as far as he was concerned, just another miracle stemming from the greatest miracle of all—Kagome herself.

"What are you thinking?" she asked curiously, startling him.  But for once he didn’t stutter, as serene as he felt.  He did not, however, answer her question truthfully.  He was definitely not ready for that. 

"It’s nothing.  _Still_ can’t believe you’re not mad, is all." 

She chuckled.  "For the last time, you have nothing to be sorry for." 

"But how can you—  I mean, I did take your…virginity." 

Kagome sat up and took his hand, holding it in both of her own upon her lap.  She stared into his eyes, wanting there to be no misunderstanding.  He had opened himself up to her tonight in a new and profound way, washing away her fears with heartfelt words.  It was the least she could do to reciprocate. 

"Inuyasha, you didn’t take anything.  I don’t remember that night either, but I know that I gave myself to you willingly." 

He stared at her, mouth agape, then abruptly broke off his gaze and took to intensely studying a tuft of grass by his leg. 

"S-s-still though," he tried, unwilling to give up on this line of apology.  "To have your first time be while you were too drunk to even remember…it shouldn’t have been like that.  Sorry it wasn’t ‘romantic’ or ‘magical,’" he finished quietly, ears drooping.  He had overheard her and Sango talking about a ‘girl’s first time’ one day, and those two adjectives had definitely come up repeatedly.  Kagome’s first time, however, was probably nothing of the sort.  For her, reality must be about as far from her girlish dreams as rationally possible. 

"That’s okay," she assured him.  "I’m…I’m just glad it was you, rather than some stranger from the village." 

Inuyasha inhaled so sharply that he nearly blew a lung.  He was actually grateful for the ensuing coughing fit, however, since it gave him time to process her words without gaping at her like a fool.  She _preferred_ him.  A hanyou.  Over other humans.  He knew he shouldn’t have such a hard time wrapping his head around that, but it went against everything he had thought he knew about the world.  Even a few short months ago, when they had known each other for a while and gone through some difficult times together, he never would have imagined her sleeping with him and being _happy_ about it.  And she was happy, her smile radiant and uninhibited, her eyes shining like stars.  It was as though she honestly regretted nothing.  Or that her dreams had in fact come true, simply because she had shared herself with him. 

The floor dropped out from under Inuyasha suddenly.  He was in freefall, clutching at something to grab onto but finding only uncompromising void.  If what he had just imagined was true, then Kagome was in love with him.  But she _couldn’t_ be in love with him…could she?  Yes they were friends, and yes she cared about him, perhaps even as more than friends.  But love?  He tried to convince himself it wasn’t true.  What was love, anyway?  He wasn’t even sure he knew what it felt like.  Logically, what love meant to him was commitment, wanting to give one’s life to another and receive the other person’s life in return.  It wasn’t about financial stability, or even having children; love to him was a burning desire to be with someone else, forever.  And ‘forever’ was the crucial word.  He now knew that Kagome did not mind sharing her body with him at least once.  He had already known that she wished to remain by his side for the time being.  But she could not possibly want to live with him for the rest of their days; she could not possibly feel that burning desire to stay by his side until death parted them.  It made no sense, whatsoever.  It was impossible. 

And yet, a stubborn part of him pointed out that Kagome never made any logical sense.  She was a great enigma, and if anyone could truly love him, it was her.  All of this was to say nothing about his own feelings, perhaps an even greater enigma.  Did he, by his own definition, love Kagome? 

"Was it…your first time also?" 

Her soft voice brought him back to the present, for which he was eternally grateful.  Contemplating his feelings was hard; putting it off for another day was easy.  He did, however, wish that she had asked a less embarrassing question.  But given the conversation they had been engaged in, he could not deny her the truth. 

Kagome beamed brightly at his curt nod.  "I’m glad," was all she said, but it was enough to set his heart racing all over again.  _Me too._   His eyes widened at the revelation.  He was glad that his first sexual experience had been with Kagome; there was no one on this earth whom he would rather share himself with.  The obvious ‘why?’ question which followed scared the hell out of him.  The answer could change everything.  Suddenly his head hurt; he was tired of thinking.  He and Kagome were going to stay friends and continue on their journey together.  He had plenty of time to sort himself out, to discern what Kagome was to him and where she fit into his future.  Right? 

And so, in part because of his emotional fatigue, and in part because he wanted to steer the conversation away from awkward topics, Inuyasha sat up straight and faced Kagome head-on. 

"So…still friends?" he asked in a tone which spoke of both confidence and finality. 

If Kagome noticed his clear attempt to abort the discussion, she took no offense to it.  Instead, she chuckled and shook her head wryly, before leaning forward and enfolding him in a warm embrace.  He wrapped his arms around her, both cherishing the closeness.  But the moment passed quickly, and Kagome soon pulled away. 

"Of course, baka," she told him in answer to his question.  "Come on," she said, rising and offering him a hand up.  "Let’s go back to camp." 

He accepted her offer and pulled himself to his feet, but then released her hand and stepped away, wearing an amused smirk. 

"Keh.  You go ahead.  I’m gonna take a bath.  I stink too, you know." 

Kagome put her hands on her hips and flashed a mock glare.  "Oh, so I stink, do I?" 

"You did, but not anymore," Inuyasha replied easily, surprised by the effortlessness of their banter. 

Kagome sighed in an attempt to portray misery.  "I knew you had ulterior motives.  You were just trying to make me smell better." 

"Keh.  I could’ve just thrown you in that pond we passed this morning, wench.  I brought you here instead ‘cause I’m such a nice guy." 

"You just didn’t want me to say ‘it.’"

Inuyasha shrugged, but did not deny it.  Still, Kagome saw right through his nonchalance.  She had already come to the conclusion that Inuyasha had brought her to this hot spring because he wanted to do something nice for her, and their discussion this evening had done nothing to disprove that notion.  In fact, this evening had gone about as well as it possibly could have.  She would say that the air was _fully_ cleared between them; there was literally nothing left that needed to be said.  With that in mind, she decided to leave him to his bath. 

"Enjoy your bath, Inuyasha." 

"Keh.  Don’t get lost on the way back, wench." 

"I can see the glow from the fire!  Ooooooh!  Baka!" 

Inuyasha snickered as she vanished from sight, feeling freer than he could ever remember.  He almost couldn’t believe that things had gone as well as they had.  Their friendship was stronger than he had dared to hope.  Was there anything they couldn’t weather? 

* * *

Days passed, and life returned to normal for our hanyou and miko, with some slight differences.  Awkward moments became more common, but they were almost more a source of amusement to the pair than they were embarrassing.  Their companions noticed that they talked to each other more, not significantly so, but enough to be noticeable.  The lightheartedness which had characterized their interactions on ‘good days’ in the past now seemed to be the rule rather than the exception.  The real source of change was Inuyasha, who appeared to be secure in his own skin in a way never seen before.  Overall, it appeared to every member of the Inu-gang that not only had Inuyasha and Kagome overcome their ill-advised night of drunken passion, but that they had grown closer because of it. 

They all should have known that those blissful days were too good to be true.   

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Sorry about that last line, folks, but I had do to it. Couldn’t have you thinking that the rest of this story is all sunshine and flowers, now could I?


	4. Side Effects

"Kagome, run!" 

The voice was Inuyasha’s, his normally gruff tone inflected with desperation.  She didn’t need to look at him to know that his eyes were wide with fear.  But Kagome had no intention of obeying.  This battle had seen too many close calls already.  Inuyasha, Miroku, Sango—all had come within a matter of centimeters of death in the past few minutes.  She, Kagome, was the only one who had the luxury of staying back and out of danger. 

But no longer.  Their enemy was charging at her, its powerful arm prepared to smash her into pulp.  It was underestimating her.  For this mistake, it would pay with its life.  She would end this battle with one shot, and the lives of her friends would no longer be in jeopardy. 

Exhaling slowly and calmly, she readied her arrow. 

* * *

It had been a little over a week since Inuyasha and Kagome talked things out, and the Inu-gang had settled back into a routine.  Wake up, eat, travel, eat, travel, make camp, eat, and sleep.  Rinse and repeat.  And if the hanyou and miko were acting slightly nicer to each other than usual, then that was most certainly a good thing.  There had been no youkai attacks to speak of, and they had not come across another village to check for rumors of Naraku.  Normally a stretch of boredom of this length would frustrate Inuyasha, but the hanyou showed no signs of grumpiness.  Beyond his customarily gruff demeanor, of course.  But even that had been noticeably softer as of late.  He had more patience for everyone, particularly Shippou.  At one point, the fox kit had commented that Inuyasha must be trying to set a new personal record for most days in between dirt tastings.  The streak ended later that evening when the two of them squabbled over the last fish, but instead of letting Shippou have it as she normally would, Kagome gave it to Kirara.  The message was clear: Inuyasha wasn’t allowed to bully Shippou, but the kit wasn’t allowed to instigate either.  The next night the two of them silently agreed to split the last morsel.  So Shippou avoided another lump on the head, and Inuyasha did not have to chase his meal down with dirt. 

Overall, things were going incredibly well.  Too well, as it turned out.  Periods of peace seldom lasted long, and they were often followed by times of turmoil.  All of the tranquility came to an abrupt end one sunny afternoon, along a quiet country road running through a forested valley. 

Inuyasha’s announcement that he smelled a foul scent on the breeze signaled the beginning of the trouble.  At first Kagome thought he might have been referring to Kouga, but the hanyou’s grave expression quashed that idea.  His hand came to rest on Tetsusaiga’s hilt as he turned to the north, a cold, sinister southerly wind whipping his hair. 

"Get back, all of you," he ordered, and everyone obeyed.  They were not afraid to fight, but they would defer to Inuyasha’s judgment, at least until it became clear that the hanyou needed assistance.  Shippou was already shaking like a leaf, and Kirara hissed furiously.  Whatever scent Inuyasha had detected was spooking them as well. 

Their enemy came into sight at a distance of several hundred meters, emerging from behind a small rise.  At first glance, Kagome thought it looked like a run-of-the-mill oni, perhaps toward the larger end of the spectrum.  But as it came closer, she began to second-guess her initial assessment.  It was a huge creature, its shoulders swollen hideously with muscle to support two massively powerful arms.  But the skin was a dark tan, and even at a distance the texture didn’t seem quite right—it looked softer, more like human skin.  Coupled with the armour it was wearing, complete with massive chest plates and shoulder guards, this thing looked nothing like any oni Kagome had ever seen. 

An opinion confirmed as it came to a halt a few dozen meters away, sizing them up with a fanged grin.  In fact, the mouth seemed frozen in a perpetual sneer, baring interlocking rows of pointed teeth.  Black pupils studied them, a certain level of intelligence reflected back.  They were ridiculously small for a creature this size, practically drowning in bleach white, bloodshot sclera.  Painted blue markings under the eyes and spiky green hair standing atop its head like writhing flames completed the maniacal look. 

Kagome turned to Inuyasha to gauge his reaction, and found him gazing at her questioningly.  Instantly she knew what he wanted to know.  She shook her head, unable to detect even a trace of the Shikon no Tama on the creature’s body.  Whatever this thing was, it was this large and powerful on its own. 

"Hm, just as the kid said," the creature declared smugly in a low, sinister voice, talking to itself.  "A pathetic-looking hanyou, three humans, and a neko-youkai.  The neko might be good roasting over a spit, the humans I’ll just eat raw.  The hanyou looks bony and unappetizing, maybe I’ll just kill him.  Or I could boil him in a pot with the humans.  Hm…" 

Kagome was not surprised that the creature could speak, given its vaguely humanoid appearance.  It was, however, more than a little disturbing to hear it ponder aloud the most delicious way to devour her. 

"Oi, oi, oi," Inuyasha interjected, his voice fierce but calm.  He slowly drew Tetsusaiga from its sheath, transformed it, and leaned it against his shoulder.  "What the hell are you going on about, bastard?  If you wanna fight, just say so." 

The creature glanced at Inuyasha and laughed, much to the hanyou’s ire.  Then it focused its malevolent stare directly at Kagome, who shrank back under the malice in its gaze. 

"A girl wearing clothes the likes of which you’ve never seen carries the shards of the Shikon no Tama," it stated, as if quoting from memory.  "That must be you, girl.  Tell me, will you hand the shards over in exchange for a painless death, or do I have to make this messy?" 

"Oi!" Inuyasha yelled, concealing none of his anger as he placed himself in front of Kagome, cutting off the creature’s line of sight.  "Don’t fucking talk to her!  You so much as look at her again, and I’ll rip those ugly-ass eyeballs of yours out of your skull!" 

The creature chuckled again, as if genuinely amused by the threat.  "You can’t beat me, hanyou.  That sword of yours, help from your humans, none of it will make any difference.  I’m invincible.  If you don’t believe me, come at me and find out." 

Inuyasha looked like he wanted to do just that, but he held himself back.  "Answer me one question before I slaughter you.  You mentioned a kid before.  Tell me, was this kid wearing taijiya armour?" 

Kagome had wondered the same thing and was glad Inuyasha had asked about it before charging in.  She glanced over at Sango; her friend was stone-faced, but her eyes gave away her emotions.  If the child the creature had mentioned really was Kohaku, then they could be one step closer to finding Naraku and freeing the lad. 

But their adversary only shrugged.  "Maybe he was, maybe he wasn’t.  Could be that he’s already in my belly." 

"Bastard!" 

"You lie," Sango accused quietly.  The creature only looked at her and sneered.  Growling to herself, Sango reared back and prepared to throw hiraikotsu.  Inuyasha’s cutting voice stopped her. 

"Wait, Sango!  This thing…something’s not right.  It doesn’t smell like a youkai or a human.  Instead, it reeks of a corpse and graveyard soil!" 

Kagome gasped.  _Not human or youkai, but dead?  That means, this thing is like Kikyou?_   Only to a certain extent, she realized.  Kikyou was cruel and bitter, but this creature was pure evil in a way the dead miko had never been. 

"Just what the hell are you?" she heard Inuyasha demand. 

Their enemy chuckled darkly.  "Isn’t it obvious?  I’m human." 

Kagome could only shake her head.  _But how can that be?  How can this huge, hideous thing be human?_   And that wasn’t even considering Inuyasha’s claim that it smelled like a walking corpse.  Just what was going on here?  There was a piece missing, and for the life of her she couldn’t solve the puzzle. 

Evidently, Inuyasha reached the same conclusion.  "Kagome," he asked her urgently, "are you _sure_ this bastard doesn’t have a jewel shard?" 

She looked for a second time, but once again could detect no telltale light from a piece of the Shikon no Tama.  Whether pure or tainted black, she had always been able to see the subtle glow emitted by jewel shards.  There just simply wasn’t any such indicator on this guy’s body. 

"I’m positive, Inuyasha," she told him confidently.  He nodded once, then turned back to their opponent. 

"All right, then.  Prepare yourself, asshole.  I’m gonna put you back in the ground where you belong!" 

He charged forward, intending to close the distance and blow this abomination away with a Kaze no Kizu at point-blank range.  At times, he would admit to purposely extending fights just to get some enjoyment out of them.  But that was against weak opponents, when he knew exactly what he was facing.  Not here; he didn’t know what this thing was capable of, or even what it was.  Reanimated corpse or no, the mystery factor meant that he would not take this opponent lightly.  Especially with Kagome and the others far closer to the combat zone that he would have liked. 

The enemy lurched into motion, bringing its hand down in an open-hand smash.  It moved quicker than Inuyasha would expect for a creature its size, and as a result the hanyou did not have enough time to unleash any of Tetsusaiga’s stronger attacks.  Instead, he settled for dodging to the right, landing gracefully on the balls of his feet as the impact sent chunks of dirt and rock flying in all directions.  Then he executed a swift change of direction and neatly severed the arm at the wrist with one swing of his sword. 

Now normally, when a living being loses an appendage, the natural reaction is to recoil in shock.  This enemy did no such thing.  Instead, it suddenly swept the now hand-less arm laterally along the ground, catching Inuyasha by surprise.  The hanyou managed to twist his body to avoid taking the impact directly in the chest, but it still threw him a fair distance and jarred Tetsusaiga from his grasp.  He rolled as he hit the ground, until his momentum ceased and he was able to pick himself up, swearing and shaking his head to clear the dizziness.  Again the creature behaved in an unexpected manner; instead of pursing him, it had retrieved its lost hand.  The stump of its arm, Inuyasha observed, was not bleeding nearly as profusely as it should be.  Then it held the two disparate parts together.  A chorus of gasps rang out as hand and arm fused into one, flawlessly reconnecting skin, muscle, and bone.  The arrogant sneer reappeared, and the creature turned to face the hanyou again, flexing its reattached fingers menacingly. 

Inuyasha grimaced and scanned the area for his sword, spying it a fair distance away.  His opponent also noticed the weapon, lying approximately halfway between them, perhaps slightly closer to the latter.  Both combatants moved simultaneously, Inuyasha racing to reclaim his sword and the creature trying to prevent this.  It became clear to the hanyou that he was going to lose this race, but he determined to slice his way through with his claws even if he got there last.  If this thing could regenerate, he would need Tetsusaiga’s higher attacks in order to defeat it.  Total obliteration was the only way to go in a situation like this. 

Just before they clashed, a swirl of motion soared in from Inuyasha’s left and took out a chunk of his opponent’s shoulder.  It was hiraikotsu, now coming back around to return to its wielder.  He heard the sound Kirara always made when she transformed, and knew that his taijiya backup would soon be airborne.  The creature, however, was barely fazed by this turn of events; indeed, the wound in its shoulder started to heal almost instantly.  Then it was upon him, one clawed hand swiping at him from the side and the other raised to strike from above.  Inuyasha somersaulted over the former and sidestepped the latter, always cognizant of where the prize lay less than a dozen meters away.  But his enemy was aware of this as well, and was careful not to overextend itself.  It was clearly not swinging as hard as it could, but one hit would stun well enough, allowing a death blow to follow immediately thereafter. 

Still Inuyasha continued to dodge, not wanting to risk counterattacking with his claws now that he knew this bastard could regenerate.  One misstep now could mean the end of him.  But after a minute or two of this monotony, he decided to try something different.  He leapt back out of range, then turned and bolted in the opposite direction, encouraging the creature to follow him, which it did.  After a few long strides, Inuyasha leapt and planted his feet against a tree, intending to launch himself off of it and use the sudden change of direction to surprise his enemy and get past it to Tetsusaiga.  It probably would have worked too, if the damn tree had not been so weak.  Oh, it seemed perfectly normal on the outside, a young tree growing toward maturity.  But on the inside, it had been eaten away by insects of some kind, deteriorating its structural integrity.  Thus, when a hanyou moving at great speed tried to use it as a springboard, said hanyou’s momentum cracked the trunk near the base.  As a result, the springboard gave way, and the hanyou’s powerful leap was reduced to a feeble flop. 

As soon as Inuyasha heard that snap and felt the tree give way under his feet, he knew he was in trouble.  Much of the mighty thrust of his legs was spent in pushing the tree over, rather than launching himself off of a stable platform.  As he plummeted to the ground in a short arc, he saw his enemy closing in.  He dove to the side as soon as his toes touched the ground, but the massive hand still caught him with a glancing blow, one of the claws raking a deep gouge in his back.  He flew through the air until he struck another tree, this one unfortunately much sturdier than the last.  He sank to the ground on unsteady feet, supporting himself against the trunk and shaking his head to clear it.  Through blurred vision he saw the creature’s closed fist approaching impossibly fast, obviously intended to leave him as nothing more than a dark red stain on the bark.  Inuyasha gritted his teeth and raised his claws.  It was time to see which was stronger—this creature’s flesh and bone, or Sankon Tetsusou. 

Perhaps fortunately, the opportunity to find out was averted at the last moment.  The creature suddenly cried out in agony, and its fist vanished from view.  Now seeing the world clearly again, Inuyasha once more glimpsed hiraikotsu returning to its owner, now soaring above on her fire-cat companion.  Their enemy was crouched on one knee, facing away from the taijiya and perpendicularly to Inuyasha, holding its hand over its eye.  The hanyou was simultaneously grateful and impressed.  To hit a moving target in a very small vulnerable area required an excellent shot.  The eye itself would probably regenerate, but striking it there might have been the only way to get this thing to actually react to an injury.  It didn’t even seem to feel attacks directed at the rest of its body. 

"Inuyasha, are you okay?!" Sango called down to him.  He started to wave to her in the affirmative, but movement off to his right drew his attention.  The creature had wrapped both enormous hands around the tree he had cracked earlier.  From her vantage point, Sango could not possibly see what it was doing, which Inuyasha knew was extremely dangerous as soon as he deduced his opponent’s intentions. 

"Sango, look o—"

But it was too late to warn her, as the creature spun and flung the tree through the air with all of its considerable might.  Kirara’s quick reflexes allowed her to dodge the trunk, but she could not completely avoid all of the smaller branches and leaves, which tore at her fur and tangled around her.  Sango, already thrown off balance by her companion’s sudden dodge, could not hold on as the passing tree pulled Kirara back.  The fire-cat freed herself, leaving chunks of skin and fur behind, but not in time to save Sango as she plummeted toward the ground.  Fortunately, Inuyasha had already set himself in motion, anticipating that something like this might happen.  He caught Sango easily and set her on her feet. 

"Go!" he told her, shoving her toward where hiraikotsu lay in the grass several meters away.  Mostly he just wanted her away from the battlefield.  She could reenter the fray if she wanted to, after she had recollected hiraikotsu and checked on Kirara.  A quick glance assured him that Miroku, Shippou, and Kagome had also managed to escape the careening piece of timber.  The twigs and leaves stuck to the monk’s clothing indicated that it had been a close shave for him.  He had probably rushed in when he saw Sango in peril, and been left directly in the tree’s path once its trajectory descended.  Kagome and Shippou had been far enough back so that getting out of the way was relatively easy for them. 

Even so, the two near misses pissed Inuyasha off.  He rounded on the enemy, glaring and growling.  The creature did not seem pleased either, probably from having its eye pulverized by hiraikotsu.  It had indeed healed, but it still must have hurt like a son of a bitch.  Both antagonists comprehended the situation at the same time.  Their positions had shifted during the battle, taking them away from Tetsusaiga and leaving both at approximately equal distances from it.  Their eyes met once, and then the race was on.  Inuyasha was just a fraction of a second quicker on the takeoff this time.  But that advantage did not guarantee that he would win the prize.  His opponent’s attack range was obviously much greater than his own.  And as they converged inexorably to a single point, he prepared himself for a strike. 

His foresight was rewarded; for once, the creature behaved exactly as predicted, sending a backhand swipe his way as soon as he was within range.  Inuyasha planted his foot and leapt inside the radius of the swing, once again severing hand from arm, this time with Sankon Tetsusou.  Continuing on his course, he did the same to a massive leg, leaving his enemy stumbling to a halt.  Yes, it could reattach the limb, but it would be hobbled for a few crucial moments.  That was all the time Inuyasha needed to reach Tetsusaiga.  With a mighty cry he spun and unleased the Kaze no Kizu.  At such short distance, the result was never in doubt.  Blades of youki tore through muscle and bone, rending flesh and scattering the creature into hundreds of bloody pieces. 

But Inuyasha did not allow himself to enjoy his victory just yet.  He watched and waited to see if this thing could still pull itself back together from such a dismembered state.  The first sign of movement was a twitch by the left half of the lower jaw, which had been separated from the rest of the face.  The face…most of the head was still intact, Inuyasha saw.  And those eyes were far from lifeless.  Sure enough, the disparate pieces of the creature’s body began to converge with an ominous radiance, pulled inexorably toward the head.  So that was the focal point of this thing’s regeneration ability, rather than the heart.  That was useful information, but Inuyasha still found himself stumped by this turn of events.  Everything about this thing screamed corpse reanimated by a shard of the Shikon no Tama.  He trusted Kagome when she said there was no jewel shard involved, but everyone made mistakes sometimes. 

And how would they destroy it, with Tetsusaiga ineffective?  The obvious answer was Miroku’s kazaana, but that course posed dangers as well.  If Kagome was wrong, and there really was a jewel shard inside this youkai’s head, what would happen if the monk tried to suck it up?  He doubted a piece of the Shikon no Tama would simply fall quietly into the void.  Something would happen, and it would not be good for Miroku.  And even if Miroku could suck in a shard, how would they ever accomplish their mission of completing the Shikon no Tama then?  Still, there had to be a way to use the kazaana to defeat this bastard.  Inuyasha grinned as the answer came to him. 

"Miroku!" he called.  "When I tell you to, open your kazaana."  He heard footsteps coming closer, meaning the monk was getting into position. 

By this time, the creature had nearly fully reformed.  It saw Inuyasha raise his sword, and knew what was about to happen.  In desperation it flung its left hand, which had yet to reattach, toward the hanyou.  The tactic worked, as Inuyasha was forced to sidestep before he could launch another Kaze no Kizu.  In the single second it took him to set his feet again, the creature was on the move.  Inuyasha paused mid-swing as his opponent placed itself between him and Sango and Miroku, knowing that the hanyou would not use that attack again with his friends in the line of fire.  But the monk and taijiya were not the creature’s targets this time.  When Inuyasha saw who its fury was focused upon now, he felt his blood run cold. 

"Kagome, run!"

But she was not running.  Instead, he watched in horror as she drew an arrow from her quiver.  _Dammit, wench!_   How could she even be sure that her arrow would stop this bastard?  If it was really a reanimated corpse, it stood to reason that a surge of pure energy would do _something._   But would the arrow purify it like a youkai?  If not, would the resulting damage be enough to stop the creature in its tracks?  The uncertainty caused Inuyasha to slide into a state of near panic.  But there was nothing he could do; he clearly was not going to make it to Kagome in time to save her, and he could not use the Kaze no Kizu for fear of accidentally hitting her.  His mad dash to reach her was further slowed when the creature’s left hand nearly took his head off returning to its body.  All he could do was resume his desperate sprint, careful to give Kagome a clear shot with her arrow.  That, and pray. 

His prayers were answered.  Kagome notched the arrow, drew and aimed all without the slightest falter.  She had ample time to charge the projectile and release it before the creature was upon her.  But from this moment of optimism, things went horribly wrong.  Kagome’s eyes widened, as if she was some virgin to combat losing her nerve completely.  The arrow slipped from her grasp, the bow lowering to her side.  She stared at her right hand, her gaze unfocused, as if she was not even aware of the towering mass of muscle and savagery bearing down on her.  The creature’s hand reached for her; no doubt its intention was to devour her and her jewel shards whole, in one massive bite.  Inuyasha’s heart stopped, his own arms reaching out for her helplessly.  If there was anything he could have done to save her life, including sacrificing his own, he would have done it.  In that moment when it appeared he was going to lose the one person who made his life worth living, he knew true despair. 

Salvation came in an unexpected form.   A large, googly-eyed pink balloon appeared in a puff of smoke, a child’s high-pitched cry emanating as it smashed into the huge outstretched arm.  The force of the impact was just enough to knock the appendage off of its intended course.  Instead of grabbing Kagome, the questing digits just barely missed her, the pressure wave ruffling her clothing like the passage of a high-speed train.  In frustration, the creature swatted the balloon away.  Fortunately for Shippou, he was still viewed as more of an annoyance than a threat.  But the kit’s bravery had bought Inuyasha the time he needed to catch up.  The hanyou did not even have to alter his course to snatch the fox out of mid-air.  And by the time the creature made another grab for Kagome, she was no longer there, borne away instead to safety. 

Inuyasha set her down a hundred yards away from the spot where her life had almost ended.  She still looked like she had no idea what was going on, but he would deal with that later.  Right now, he had a battle to finish.  The enemy was charging toward them, its massive footfalls sending vibrations through the earth.  Sango and Miroku were hot on its heels atop Kirara.  As for Shippou, Inuyasha deposited him atop his own shoulder.  The dizzy fox kit had earned the right to be a part of this.  Satisfied that Shippou had a good grip on his haori, he turned to face the enemy. 

"Nice work, Shippou," he declared sincerely.  "But we’ll take it from here!" 

The Kaze no Kizu Inuyasha unleased was larger and more ferocious than the first, and it sliced the creature into twice as many pieces.  But even so, it refused to die; already the head was reforming.  Inuyasha leapt into the midst of the carnage, snatching the severed head with one hand and carrying it away from the rest of the body.  The bloody pieces started to pursue him, but it was too late. 

"Now, Miroku!" he yelled as he passed under Kirara.  The monk did not need to be told twice.  Within a matter of moments, nothing remained of the creature’s once formidable body, courtesy of the kazaana.  And that infuriating sneer finally vanished for good. 

"No, my body!" it cried pitifully.  "My body!  Give it back, give it back, give it ba—"

"Shut up!" 

Inuyasha punctuated his demand by smashing the head against the ground, feeling a perverse satisfaction at the telltale snapping of its mandible.  No doubt that would heal, but at least it would buy them a few moments of peace.  At the very least, it should not be able to recall its body back from the abyss.  Now, they could get to the bottom of this bothersome regeneration ability.  But first, he had something important to check on. 

He approached Kagome intending to first inquire as to her well-being, before reaming her out for nearly getting herself killed.  But the faint smell of her blood blew away any self-restraint he might have possessed.  He could see the cut from here, just a small scratch on her forearm from where the creature’s claw had grazed her.  But it really brought home the reality of how close he had come to losing her.  A few centimeters deeper, and they would be scrambling to try to prevent her from bleeding to death right now.  A fraction of a meter deeper still, and she would already be dead.  And all because she been so fucking _stupid._   All because she hadn’t fucking listened to him. 

"What the _hell_ were you thinking, Kagome!" he bellowed harshly.  Finally she started, emerging from her stupor and meeting his irate gaze with wide, shocked eyes.  If anything, this only made him angrier. 

"Dammit, wench!  You’re fucking helpless enough when you’re actually paying attention.  Don’t try to fight if you can’t even keep your head on straight!" 

Now, there were several ways in which Kagome could react to this.  She could get pissed at him, and the resulting massive argument would likely end with him eating dirt.  She could try to calmly explain why she had frozen up, attempting to keep her cool because she knew he was in the right.  Least likely of all, she could apologize and take his criticism contritely.  He did not, however, expect her eyes to suddenly tear up.  The hardening of her gaze caught him completely by surprise, despair swirling with righteous fury in her chocolate pools.  The anger he expected, but not this sort of raw, unfettered rage, fueled by desperation.  It caused him to recoil, to open his mouth to attempt to retract some of his harsher words.  But it was far too late for that. 

"Well, Inuyasha, I’m sorry I’m so _helpless_ and useless and every other insult you’ve ever thrown my way!  I’m sorry I’m not _perfect_ like Kikyou!" 

"Kag—" he tried, but she cut him off. 

"No, you know what?  I’m done!"  She sobbed and shook her head, her tears spilling onto her clothes.  "I’m done," she repeated quietly, gritting her teeth. 

"K-Kagome, I didn’t—"

"Osuwari!" 

*Thud*

"Osuwari!  Osuwari!  OSUWARI!!!"

*Thud Thud THUD*

Moments later, Inuyasha sat up with a groan, holding his aching head.  His ears told him that Kagome was already gone.  Sango had chased after her, so at least her epic storm-off hadn’t left her completely unprotected.  He was now even more concerned about her state of mind than he had been after her colossal slip-up.  Just what the _hell_ was all that about?  Maybe his words had been crueler than they needed to be, but his anger was fully justified.  He would dare anyone to say otherwise.  And why the hell did she bring up Kikyou’s name?  She _never_ brought up Kikyou, for anything.  What the fuck did Kikyou have to do with this?!  And what did she mean by ‘I’m done?’  Done with what?  Done being a miko?  Done shard hunting?  Done…with him? 

A soft moan from below him broke his gloomy train of thought.  Inuyasha couldn’t help but crack a small grin at the sight.  Shippou had clearly not managed to remove himself from the danger zone before Kagome said ‘the word.’  The kit had experienced the ‘osuwari’ command for the first time, and obviously not enjoyed it.  Inuyasha had not landed on him, but his rapid descent to the dirt had propelled Shippou into a nice face-plant of his own. 

"Ow…" came kit’s muffled voice. 

"Heh.  Hurts, don’t it, runt?"  Nevertheless, Inuyasha gingerly peeled Shippou from his tiny crater and placed the kit on his shoulder once more. 

"You okay?" he asked, more referring to the battle than the ‘osuwari.’  Shippou shook his head, and Inuyasha rolled his eyes.  "Well, is anything broken?" 

Shippou flexed his arms and legs, then gave the answer Inuyasha already suspected.  "I don’t think so." 

"Then you’ll be fine by morning," he declared, reaching up and ruffling the kid’s hair affectionately.  "You’re pretty tough, for a little squirt." 

Shippou could only sputter incoherently at the praise, and try not to let Inuyasha know how much it mean to him.  The two of them often did not get along, but obviously the hanyou was seeing him in a new light.  If this was the treatment he was going to get, he would have to save Kagome’s life more often.  He did hope that she would not _need_ saving in the future, but somehow that never seemed to be the case. 

"Oi, Shippou," the hanyou said suddenly, his tone serious.  "You have any idea why Kagome got so pissed?" 

"No," was the kit’s immediate reply.  "You were just being your usual self." 

In the past, Inuyasha might have taken offense to that statement, but it was completely true.  Under normal circumstances, Kagome could see through at least some of his gruffness and insults, and not blow a stack when he called her helpless.  She would understand that he was only mean to her because he had been worried about her.  She would certainly not react in the way she had this afternoon, which was way over the top.  It comforted him to know that Shippou felt the same way, but it also brought him no closer to solving the mystery.  Fortunately, he had another friend who was more observant than both of them. 

"I believe I may be able to provide some insight," Miroku stated quietly.  His tone immediately put Inuyasha on edge; more than anything, the monk seemed sad. 

"Well, out with it!" the hanyou demanded impatiently. 

Miroku sighed.  "Did you see what happened, Inuyasha?" 

"Of course I did.  She went to fire an arrow, then totally spaced out and dropped it.  The baka would’ve gotten herself killed if it wasn’t for Shippou." 

"That’s all elementary, Inuyasha.  I mean, did you see why she ‘spaced out,’ as you put it?" 

"Obviously, I didn’t.  Can you just fucking spit it out, bouzu?  I ain’t got all day." 

Miroku glared at him, but continued anyway.  "Kagome-sama tried to charge the arrow with pure energy as she always does, but was unable to do so." 

Inuyasha’s lungs seized up, unable to draw breath.  He gazed helplessly at Miroku, silently pleading for confirmation that he’d just misheard him.  But the monk only regarded him calmly, with suddenly sympathetic eyes.  Then he uttered the words Inuyasha least wanted to hear. 

"She has lost her spiritual power, Inuyasha." 

The hanyou clenched his hand into a fist and pounded it into the dirt.  It all made sense now—the shock on her face, the way she stared blankly at her empty hand, and her fierce response to his words. 

"How?" he choked out through gritted teeth, though he already knew the answer. 

"From losing her virginity, I assume," Miroku answered simply, though there was a hint of confusion in his tone.  Inuyasha latched on to that, redirecting his fury.  With all of the guilt and bewilderment and anger churning inside him, it was nice to have a convenient outlet. 

"Why the fuck didn’t you say anything before?!" he demanded, rising to his feet and pointing an accusing finger at Miroku.  "You knew this could happen!" 

"We _all_ knew this could happen, Inuyasha," Miroku responded firmly, unwilling to sit back and take the hanyou’s unjustified ire.  " _You_ were the one who spoke to her about that night, so I assumed that you discussed it with her." 

Seeing the hanyou’s ears droop, Miroku took a deep breath and composed himself.  He knew where Inuyasha was coming from; if he had lain with a woman and made her lose part of herself, other than her physical virginity, then he was sure he would feel incredibly guilty as well.  In this case, Inuyasha really didn’t deserve his own condemnation. 

"I honestly never expected this to happen, Inuyasha," he told the hanyou.  "Before I met you and Kagome-sama, I too subscribed to the commonly-held belief that a miko must remain physically pure to maintain her spiritual power.  But traveling with the two of you, and getting to know Kagome-sama, have enlightened me as to what I now believe to be the truth.  Purity comes in many forms; the corporeal body can be but one vassal.  But emotional and spiritual purity, I believe, are much more important indicators.  Kagome-sama has always been the purest person I have ever met, in all three respects.  Now, this is no longer the case for one of them.  But her heart and soul have not changed.  I cannot make sense of a world where a good, kind-hearted woman loses her spiritual power simply because she lies with a man." 

It occurred to Miroku that the words he had just uttered would be considered heresy by some, perhaps even a majority of the population.  But the widely-accepted worldview was not logically sound.  Why should monks be allowed to marry and have children, while miko must never know physical intimacy?  Sex could in itself be an act of absolute purity when enjoyed by two people who loved each other, as Kagome and Inuyasha did.  Miroku himself was no virgin, but his own spiritual power had never weakened even though he had slept with several women he had never seen afterwards.  Surely the Kami would not condone such a perverse double standard. 

The more he considered it, the more he thought that the common belief had originally arisen to prevent youkai-stricken human populations from losing invaluable miko.  It was not the act of making love that could cause a miko to lose her abilities, but what could follow.  Nothing could ruin a heart or blacken a soul like love gone bad.  Even the untimely death of a husband or child could send a person spiraling into despair.  And unlike loss of physical purity, such emotionally destructive changes would logically have in impact on spiritual power.  Perhaps people thought that women of holy ability would be unable to handle all of the highs and lows which came with love and parenthood.  Men, on the other hand, could weather stronger emotional storms because they were naturally more level-headed and intelligent.  That was a load of rubbish, but then so were a lot of things people believed. 

So things were relatively straight in Miroku’s head, though he hoped he would not have to explain his belief to Inuyasha in great detail.  Fortunately, the hanyou seemed more interested in the implications rather than his reasoning. 

"So then why did she lose her power?" he asked, his tone noticeably calmer than before. 

"There must be some other explanation," Miroku told him.  "Unfortunately, I have no theories at this time." 

Inuyasha grimaced, but didn’t say anything in response.  He stared off into space, clearly trying to come up with a theory of his own, one which would unquestionably relieve much of his guilt.  But Miroku knew this was futile; emotions were too raw, anger and hurt too fresh.  They needed time to calm down and think about this logically, detached from emotion.  And that was not going to happen until Inuyasha and Kagome had once again talked things out.  Now, how to convince the stubborn hanyou that such a discussion was necessary…

"It was not exactly the best time to call Kagome-sama ‘helpless,’ my friend," Miroku observed, careful to keep his voice devoid of censure. 

Inuyasha reacted defensively as anticipated.  "W-w-well I didn’t fucking know!" he sputtered. 

"I am aware of that, Inuyasha," Miroku replied patiently.  "But you still must make this right.  You must apologize to Kagome-sama." 

"Why the hell should I?  She’s the one who overreacted!" 

"Perhaps that is true, but it makes no difference.  She would not have ‘overreacted’ if you had not insulted her in the first place." 

Inuyasha grumbled, but he couldn’t really argue the point.  He was about to mutter something petulant when shouting from across the battlefield drew everyone’s attention. 

"Oi, what are you doing?!  No!  Don’t take—aaaaaahhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!" 

"Shit!" Inuyasha cursed, sprinting toward where the forgotten creature’s severed head lay in the dirt.  As he watched, the flesh disintegrated leaving nothing but bones.  The reason for this was the saimyoushou rapidly gaining altitude overhead, carrying a tiny glimmering object which could only be a shard of the Shikon no Tama.  He continued his pursuit until the insect rose above the tree line, painfully out of reach. 

"Dammit!" he cried, furious that Naraku’s servant had gotten away with the prize.  Kirara had gone after Kagome and Sango, and on foot he simply couldn’t keep up.  The saimyoushou had waited until they were suitably distracted before making its move, reclaiming the jewel shard its master had obviously provided.  Worse than that, it had eliminated their opportunity to question the creature and perhaps get some answers as to its identity and Naraku’s location.  All they had to go by now was the fact that it had approached from out of the north. 

"So it seems you were right to suspect that the creature we fought had a shard of the Shikon no Tama in its possession," Miroku observed gravely as he approached.  "Kagome-sama must have lost her ability to sense the jewel as well." 

"Great, just fucking great.  This shit keeps getting better and better." 

Miroku sighed.  "It would be wise to change your attitude before you talk to her." 

"Keh." 

"Oh, don’t be so negative, Inuyasha.  Losing Kagome-sama’s spiritual power hurts us, but we will adjust.  On the bright side, this is the first lead we’ve had on Naraku’s location since he disappeared.  We shall simply have to travel north and see what we can find." 

Inuyasha felt his resolve returning, and pounded his fist into his palm.  Miroku was right—they would adjust.  Just as they would adjust if Tetsusaiga broke again or the bouzu found a way to cure his kazaana.  Most importantly, they would stick together and continue on their mission. 

"Yeah, and if there are any more of those undead bastards running around, I’ll wipe ‘em all out."     

"I would not be surprised if there were.  Naraku seldom does things small." 

That comment reminded Inuyasha of one ‘small’ thing Naraku had done.  "Oi, do you think that bastard really ate Kohaku?" 

Miroku considered that for a moment.  "The saimyoushou was only carrying one Shikon fragment, correct?" 

"Yeah, just one." 

"Then I doubt Kohaku is dead.  If the creature had eaten him, it would have had another shard, most likely in its belly.  And if I had sucked in a piece of the Shikon no Tama, I would probably be dead right now." 

Inuyasha nodded, relieved that at least Sango would not have to deal with her brother’s death.  They had enough problems at present, and he honestly hoped the boy could be saved in the end.  Speaking of problems…

"So Inuyasha, shall we?" Miroku asked innocently, failing to hide his amusement.  He motioned in the direction where Kagome and Sango had run off to. 

Inuyasha glared at him.  "You just don’t give up, do you?" 

Miroku regarded him seriously.  "No, not for something like this." 

"Keh." 

"Relax, my friend.  I am sure Kagome-sama will not hold it against you.  She probably feels badly for using the subduing spell so many times." 

"Keh, not fucking likely," Inuyasha muttered, but his eyes spoke of cautious hope so Miroku let the remark go. 

After a few more moments of hesitation, our reluctant hanyou set off.  He was absolutely not looking forward to facing Kagome again, but the bouzu was right—it had to be done.  He just hoped Miroku was also correct about there being another explanation for the loss of Kagome’s spiritual power.  If this was not something they could remedy, then they were about to face a whole host of problems.  Kagome’s miko abilities were a crucial part of their group’s offensive and defensive fighting strength, never mind the obvious emotional effects losing them was already having on her. 

Who knew one night of drunken foolishness could have such severe consequences? 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – In case you haven’t guessed it, that creature was Kyoukotsu of the Band of Seven. A large portion of this story will revolve around a modified Band of Seven arc. Instead of creating my own villains, I decided to play with the ones that Rumiko Takahashi already created. They are freaking awesome, after all. The characters will be the same, but the plot will be significantly different, as we’ve already seen. 
> 
> And I know that Kyoukotsu was a relative pushover in canon, but that’s only because he blabbed about the location of his jewel shard. So Kouga was able to yank the shard out and kill him just before being devoured. Without that knowledge, wolf-boy probably ends up as a furry turd-pile on the ground. Since the Inu-gang has no idea of the location of the shard (or even if Kyoukotsu has one), he’d naturally be a more difficult opponent for them.


	5. Make-ups and Missed Opportunities

"Kagome-chan, wait up!" 

But Kagome did not want to wait.  If she slowed her pace by even an infinitesimal amount, her fragile resolve to hold herself together would dissipate, and she would collapse into an inconsolable girl-shaped blob.  So she kept marching forward, ignoring Sango’s pleas.  Part of her just wanted to be held right now, but she had to be strong about this, didn’t she?  If she surrendered to her friend’s comfort, it would only prove that she was as weak and useless as everyone secretly thought.  In her mind’s eye, Inuyasha’s visage twisted, shifting from concerned anger to a cruel, taunting sneer. 

"Damn, bitch,"

he stated derisively, eyeing her with contempt.  _"You were helpless enough as a miko.  Now what the hell good are you?"_  

The visions continued.  Miroku, Sango, and Shippou were kinder about it, but in the end they all agreed.  She was dead weight, and could no longer travel with them.  She slowed them down and could now contribute nothing to the group.  She was to be left in her own time, never to return.  Her friends would seek out Kikyou to help them complete their mission, and when the Shikon no Tama was banished from this world, she and Inuyasha would journey to hell together.  And as they sank into the earth, they would share a sweet kiss, and Inuyasha would smile…

An unfortunately-placed tree root caught her foot and jolted her back to the present, as well as sending sent her sprawling face-first into the leaf litter.  Her knee stung where it had scraped against a stone on, and her palms were chafed from breaking her fall.  She cared about none of this.  All she knew was that she lacked the willpower to rise to her feet again.  Finally, she gave into the despair welling up inside her, curling onto her side and weeping bitterly. 

This was the sight which greeted Sango when she caught up a few moments later.  Initially, the taijiya could only stare in shock; in all the time she had known Kagome, she had never seen the younger girl cry anywhere near this uncontrollably.  It reminded her of the time soon after the battle inside Naraku’s castle, when she had stolen Tetsusaiga and tried unsuccessfully to kill the dark hanyou.  At that time, her emotions had been so disjointed, her grief so palpable, that she had been ready to burst at any moment.  The revelation that Kagome and the others still wanted her to travel with them was the tipping point, and she had given in to her tears and the miko’s comforting embrace.  The funny thing was that she hadn’t really felt much shame for her pitiful display afterwards, despite her warrior’s upbringing.  She had known then that these people would become more than just traveling companions.  True to her prediction, all of them were now the closest of friends.  And one of them was hurting.  Sango had no idea what had caused Kagome so much anguish, but she would do what she could to console her. 

Kagome dimly felt warm arms come to rest around her shoulders, and allowed herself to fall into them without resistance.  And when a small furry creature nuzzled close and began licking her face, she took it into her arms and squeezed it like a lifeline.  Kirara could probably not breathe properly, but she made no sound of complaint.  And so, cossetted and comforted, Kagome finally began the long and arduous process of pulling herself back together. 

The astonishment at losing her spiritual power had still held her in its icy grip when Inuyasha started yelling at her.  And when the word ‘helpless’ passed his lips, something inside her snapped.  She had always taken pride in the fact that she was a miko.  Perhaps she was not as skilled or well-trained as Kikyou, but in terms of raw power she could _compare_.  Even if she was inferior to Kikyou in every other way, no one could say that she was weaker in this one regard.  She was not completely useless, and had in fact saved the lives of all of her friends on several occasions.  But that word, spoken in that furious tone…it had made her realize exactly what she was without her power.  A clumsy, useless girl devoid any special characteristics to speak of.  A burden. 

She had lashed out defensively then, taken her despair and turned it into a weapon, directed at the man who had made her feel so heartbroken.  A man who, in retrospect, had not deserved her ire.  He certainly had not deserved to be subdued four times.  This realization only made Kagome feel worse, if that was possible.  As she accessed her memory, she finally saw Inuyasha’s outburst for what it was—the angry reproach of a man who had been extremely worried about her, and had used rudeness to try to conceal his concern.  As he always did.  He probably had not even comprehended the loss of her power yet. 

Kagome suddenly felt incredibly foolish for her behavior.  Now that the shock of her discovery was wearing off, and she was thinking clearly again, she looked back on her panic-clouded thoughts with disbelief.  Even in his cruelest moments, Inuyasha never turned into the evil bastard she had conjured up.  He didn’t measure a person’s worth solely by strength or fighting ability.  That was how full-youkai Inuyasha viewed the world, but the hanyou was much deeper and more compassionate.  And had she really thrown Kikyou in his face?  She groaned mentally.  Bringing up their greatest shared insecurity in the midst of an argument had not been smart.  But it had also been no less intelligent than the rest of her actions. 

She did stand by one thing, however—she really was useless now.  This changed everything; now, no one could fire purifying arrows or more importantly, detect the Shikon no Tama.  Miroku could take over the spiritual duties, but the ability to sense shards was essential to their mission.  One by one, her friends would arrive at the same conclusion—that all of them would be better off if she stayed behind on her side of the well from now on.  Oh, they would send Inuyasha to retrieve her when they returned to the village, and they would all remain friends, but they would never let her travel with them again.  The reason would _not_ be because she was useless.  The prohibition would instead likely arise out of concern, whether because she could no longer defend herself in the slightest, or because they needed Kikyou’s help to complete the mission and didn’t want to put her through that.  But her banishment would come all the same, whether any of them, including Inuyasha, really wanted to replace her with Kikyou or not.  Simply put, they had no choice; it was the only option left open to them. 

So despite the fact that the end result would be the same, she still felt bad for taking her misery out on Inuyasha.  He had never seemed particularly eager to ditch her in favor of Kikyou; in fact, she had come to cautiously believe that he preferred her company most of the time.  But again, he had no choice.  Kikyou was the only other person they knew of who could sense the Shikon no Tama.  And she could not fault him for setting off down a path which fate had already dictated for him.  Just as she would not blame him for taking her virginity that night, the obvious cause of the loss of her miko abilities.  She bore a greater share of the responsibility for their tryst and all of its consequences.  And when the time came for Kikyou to take her place as the miko of their group, she would do her best to smile and see them off.  Because there was nothing for him to apologize for, nothing for her to forgive.  Above all else, she hoped they could remain friends. 

These thoughts, while somewhat uplifting, did not make Kagome feel much better.  Her tears did wind down, however, until finally she was just lying limp in her friend’s embrace, mentally drained.  After a time, Sango pulled back and helped Kagome settle with her back against a tree so they could talk.  The former miko kept her gaze downcast, refusing to make eye contact, though she did continue petting Kirara in her lap.  Sango felt her concern deepen; Kagome looked utterly defeated, as if she had given up on something very important to her.  She had to get to the bottom of this. 

"Kagome-chan, what on earth is the matter?" she asked urgently, though still managing to keep her tone fairly mild. 

Kagome shook her head.  "Ask Miroku-sama.  I’m sure he figured out what happened." 

Sango gritted her teeth and forced herself to remain calm.  Part of her wanted to smack Kagome and tell her to snap out of it, but she didn’t think tough love was the right way to approach this.  Whatever was going on inside that pretty little head of hers, Kagome thought she knew exactly how everyone would react once they found out what had happened back at the battle.  And it wasn’t good.  But that was foolish; it couldn’t be anything that would jeopardize their friendship, right? 

"I’m asking you, Kagome-chan.  Tell me what’s bothering you.  Please," she added, not caring that she was practically begging.  Kagome heaved a long-suffering sigh, but she did finally meet Sango’s gaze. 

"When I went to fire that arrow, I discovered that I couldn’t use spiritual energy anymore."  With an emotionally detached air, she removed the bottle of shards from around her neck, holding them out in front of her.  Then she casually tossed the bottle to the shocked taijiya, who barely caught it. 

"I can’t even sense those damn shards anymore," Kagome declared quietly, once again taking to staring at the ground. 

"Kagome-chan…" Sango breathed, wanting to say something but having no idea as to what. 

"It’s okay, Sango-chan," Kagome assured, mustering a painfully fake smile.  "We both know what has to happen now.  I’ve made peace with it." 

And instantly, Sango knew what had her friend so upset.  She had been partially wrong; this would not jeopardize their friendship, but it would threaten everything else about Kagome’s relationship with the group.  Or so the miko obviously thought.  Her initial reaction was to take offense that the woman she considered a surrogate sister would think so little of her.  But that wasn’t fair to Kagome, who was likely drawing much of her angst from a very complicated relationship with a certain hanyou.  Still, she should have known better.  She was thinking so selflessly right now that she drastically underestimated her own worth.  It was a misunderstanding that required immediate correction. 

"And now you think that you can’t travel with us anymore," Sango stated, this time not restraining the censure in her tone.  Kagome could be left with no doubt as to what the taijiya thought of her cockamamie ideas. 

The former miko blinked in surprise, then rolled her eyes in annoyance.  "Think about it, Sango-chan.  What am I going to do now, beat youkai to death with my bow?" 

"You don’t have to do anything.  Just let me and Inuyasha handle the fighting." 

"Tch.  Yeah, that’s real helpful.  ‘Kagome, you just sit back and do nothing while we risk our necks.’  Face it, Sango-chan, I’m just dead weight now." 

"You are _not_ dead weight!" 

Sango’s irate response caused Kagome to swallow her next words.  For half a second, she feared that the older woman was about to slap her.  But Sango clenched her first and took a deep breath, then spoke in a low, fierce tone which carried the full force of her conviction. 

"Kagome-chan, whether you realize it or not, all of us need you.  Who does Shippou turn to whenever he has a problem?  You’re the only one he really looks up to as family.  And I—what would I do without you?  You’re like a sister to me.  Who else can I talk about Houshi-sama with?  Shippou’s too young and talking to Inuyasha about anything emotional is like conversing with a stone.  And forget about Inuyasha.  He’s a wreck when you go to your time for a few _days_.  He’d probably sink into depression or lose his bloody mind if he had to leave you for any longer." 

Warmth bubbled in Kagome’s heart at her friend’s words, but she did her best to quash it.  Sweet words were nice, but reality was sour, and Sango evidently hadn’t tasted it yet. 

"You’re just saying that to make me feel better." 

"No, I’m not!  It’s true, and you damn well know it!" 

"It doesn’t matter," Kagome declared, tired of the argument.  "Even if you guys do need me, you need someone who can sense the Shikon no Tama even more.  If that’s not me, it has to be Kik—"

"Don’t say it!" Sango interrupted, but Kagome was not backing down on this. 

"It’s _Kikyou_ , Sango-chan.  You need to get Kikyou to join you.  Only she can do what needs to be done.  I can’t help you anymore, and I can’t travel with her.  I won’t put Inuyasha through that.  It…has to be this way." 

Sango shook her head in disbelief.  How could such an intelligent person be so wrong? 

"Kagome-chan, do you honestly believe that Inuyasha is capable of letting you go?" 

"He did before," Kagome replied, knowing Sango would understand what she was referring to.  One evening in a hot spring, she had told the taijiya about how Inuyasha had sent her home and sealed the well after his second battle with Sesshoumaru. 

"Before, he wasn’t in love with you," Sango retorted. 

"Inuyasha’s not in love with me," Kagome told her dejectedly.  "That’s just wishful thinking." 

"It’s not!  Trust me, Kagome-chan, he loves you even though he doesn’t realize it.  I see him when he’s with you, and when you’re gone.  There’s no doubt in my mind.  So even if he wanted to replace you with Kikyou—which he doesn’t—he wouldn’t be able to.  He’s not going to let you go.  He needs you more than anyone." 

Kagome gazed into Sango’s eyes, searching for any sign of uncertainty.  She found none.  Her friend honestly believed everything she was saying.  It was incomprehensible to her, that the woman she trusted with her closest secrets could have such a different opinion of her circumstances.  Did she dare to hope that Sango was right, and she was wrong? 

"You…you really believe all that?" 

Sango nodded firmly, overjoyed that she was finally getting through to her stubborn friend.  She reached over and took both of Kagome’s hands in her own, leaning in close. 

"Look at me, Kagome-chan.  I believe every word from the bottom of my heart." 

In the next moment, Sango found a crying former miko wrapped around her shoulders.  This time, however, her tears were born of relief and happiness.  Sango blinked back a few of her own as she returned the embrace. 

"Face it, Kagome-chan," she declared light-heartedly.  "You’re stuck with us." 

Kagome made a noise that was half laugh, half sob.  "I was so s-s-scared.  I d-don’t want to leave." 

"Shhh, it’s okay.  You don’t have to.  Maybe your power is just dormant.  We should ask Kaede-sama about it the next time we return to the village.  And if it’s gone for good, then we’ll figure something out.  We always do.  The last thing we want to do is replace you.  You hold us together, Kagome-chan.  Without you, we’d fall apart." 

Kagome pulled back and dried her tears.  She was absolutely sure that Sango was overstating things, but she appreciated the sentiment.  If a battle-hardened taijiya believed that her importance to the group went so far beyond combat prowess as to warrant being lugged around feudal Japan, then it must be so.  And if Sango felt this way, then she couldn’t imagine Miroku or Shippou having a drastically different view.  Inuyasha was the one person she still couldn’t figure out.  Sango thought he would want her to stay, but then Sango also thought that he was in love with her.  So the taijiya’s analysis of the hanyou’s state of mind was not always right on target.  Kagome knew that Inuyasha enjoyed her company, most of the time, but he was also exceedingly concerned with her safety.  And if Sango was also wrong about Inuyasha being incapable of letting her go, especially if it was for her own well-being… 

Kagome didn’t know what she would do if that were the case.  What would happen if Inuyasha wanted her to leave but everyone else wanted her to stay?  Would she give in?  Or would she refuse his demands and deal with the consequences?  Either way, their relationship would take a major step back.  She would be left with only bad options: stay and have him be angry with her, or leave and surrender him to Kikyou.  It was a true no-win situation. 

But no, she couldn’t think like that.  Not yet.  Not while she was still unsure of Inuyasha’s intentions.  Her hanyou had surprised her before; perhaps he really would wish for her to stay.  He didn’t like it when she fought anyway, much preferring her to stay back and out of harm’s way.  The only difference was that she would be incapable of protecting herself in an emergency or lending support when needed.  Maybe Inuyasha too thought she was crucial enough to the cohesion of their group to ask her to stay.  And there was always the slim chance that he needed her as much as Sango believed.  If his need for her was even a fraction as compelling as her need for him, then that was a real possibility. 

So Kagome resolved to try to remain upbeat about her prospects.  Until Inuyasha flat-out told her to go home, she would uneasily assume that he wanted her to stay.  Maybe they could talk about it tonight; she already knew that she needed to apologize for subduing him undeservedly.  She gulped at the idea of asking him directly, but it was undoubtedly the best way to go.  An honest and open conversation had worked wonders after their night of intimacy, and so it could in this situation as well.  All she had to do was gather the courage to get said conversation started. 

She tried to work on that as she and Sango made their way back to the battlefield, but her mind was finally registering the stinging in her knee and palms, not to mention the cut on her arm, so concentrating was difficult.  Any artificial bravery she might have constructed would have been thrown to the winds regardless, as soon as she laid eyes on Inuyasha again.  They both froze in mid-step at exactly the same moment.  It appeared that he and Miroku had just started on their way to come get them, which made her nervous because she knew exactly what they must have been talking about all this time. 

Little did she know that the subject of whether or not she would stay had never come up; the affirmative answer had simply been accepted by both males as a foregone conclusion.  Had Kagome been aware of this, it might have saved her and Inuyasha quite a bit of mental anguish. 

"Come on, Kagome-chan.  Let’s get you bandaged up." 

Kagome started at Sango’s voice, having been caught staring into Inuyasha’s golden eyes.  They were darkened with remorse but still maintained their shine.  What exactly did Inuyasha feel guilty about?  With this question dancing upon her consciousness, Kagome broke off her gaze and trudged over to where Sango was kneeling with the first aid kit from her bag.  With practiced ease, the taijiya cleaned, disinfected, and bandaged her various cuts and scrapes.  It was all fairly unnecessary, with how minor her injuries were, but at least now no dirt would get into the healing tissue.  When her friend was done, Kagome continued to sit with her hands folded in her lap, thumbs fidgeting nervously.  The uncomfortable atmosphere prevented her from raising her eyes, let alone say anything.  She hoped someone else would tell the group what they were going to do next; otherwise, they might be here all night. 

Although, maybe the awkwardness was all in her head.  Sango stood easily, dusting her hands off as she turned to Inuyasha. 

"You’re wounded too, right Inuyasha?" 

The hanyou seemed surprised by the question, and stuttered before answering.  "N-no, it’s just a scratch." 

"Well, let me take a look at it anyway." 

"I said I’m fine, taijiya," he retorted firmly. 

"Inuyasha…" Sango ground out, annoyed by his stubbornness.  Why did he have to make everything so damn difficult?  She opened her mouth to deliver a piece of her mind, but a soft voice cut in first. 

"Can I…do it?" 

Inuyasha gasped, beyond astounded to hear such an offer.  Kagome’s head was still downturned, but her eyes panned up to gaze at him shyly.  She looked nervous, uncertain that he would accept, and he got the distinct impression that there was something deeper going on here than the fallout from their fight.  A feeling reinforced by Sango’s glare, which spoke of copious amounts of pain if his answer was not the correct one.  Fortunately, he had no thoughts of refusing.  If Kagome was willing to start along the path to forgiveness, then so was he. 

His short nod earned a timid smile, which caused a light flush to creep along his cheeks for some reason.  As he sat in front of her and allowed her to go to work on his back, he realized that this would be different from the other times she had mended his wounds.  His disrobing, normally done with calm efficiency, took on a sensual nuance as she ever so slowly drew his robes off his shoulders and down his arms.  Her touch was soft, almost reverential, as if savoring the moment.  The fleeting sensation of her breath on the back of his neck sent tingles down his spine and caused heat to burgeon in his chest.  Whether it was simple happiness or born of something more carnal, he could not say.  What he did know with absolute certainty, was that this was the single most intimate moment he had ever enjoyed with someone.  Well, at least that he could remember.  He couldn’t explain why he felt that way; they weren’t even hugging, and she had bandaged him up dozens of times.  But whether it was something in the air or his mind playing tricks on him, her every innocent touch felt like a sinful caress, her delectable scent setting his olfactory system aflame.  His heart raced in his chest, sweat beading on his brow.  And yet, he felt no anxiety nor any desire to move away from her.  It was as though he belonged here, in this moment, in a way that he had never belonged anywhere else.  It felt like home. 

She worked in silence, only gasping once when she first saw the injury.  He could tell that it was a diagonal slash across his back, perhaps half a meter in length, running from his left shoulder down to his right hip.  A serious wound for a human, but not for a hanyou.  Nevertheless, he was glad to have it taken care of, if only because of the presence of the girl doing the mending.  At last the final bandage was taped into place, and her hands departed from his flesh.  He mourned the loss, suddenly aware once again of the unresolved tension, the imperceptible divide between them.  His dejection was fleeting.  In the next instant, he felt Kagome lean against him, her breasts pressing against his back as she draped her arms loosely around his neck and rested her chin on his shoulder.  It was a gesture of contrition, a wordless plea for forgiveness.  It was also incredibly intimate, but that did not bother him in the least.  He leaned back just slightly, then grasped her right hand tightly in his own and held it close to his chest.  She could probably feel the rapid thumping of his heart. 

"I’m sorry, Inuyasha," was all she said, but that was all that was needed. 

He nodded.  "Me too." 

He looked over at her, expecting to see a smile, but instead she was biting her lip nervously.  It appeared as though she wanted to say something, but was contemplating whether it was wise. 

"Kagome?" 

Her eyes flicked over to his, then she shook her head and put on a radiant smile which did not seem in the least bit forced.  Whatever had been bothering her, she had apparently decided not to bring it up.  That was fine with Inuyasha.  If it was truly important, he was sure they would end up discussing it eventually.  He was in too bright a mood right now to press her on it. 

It occurred to him that they had just resolved a major fight with a grand total of five words.  That might have seemed impossible before, but not now.  He sensed a sort of unspoken communication humming between them.  He had never felt so close to her.  No matter what obstacles awaited in the future, no matter what evil tried to drive them apart, they would persevere.  Together they would destroy Naraku and banish the Shikon no Tama from this world.  Together, they could conquer anything.  It made little difference whether she was a miko or not, for her true strength lay not spiritual prowess, but in her loving heart, a heart which could make even an orphaned hanyou feel at home.  She drove way his loneliness, made his soul feel whole again.  He needed her.  And in the deepest reaches of his heart, he hoped that they would never be parted. 

The sensation of warm breath caressing his lips broke him from his musings.  Kagome had moved closer during his distraction.  _Much_ closer.  Now she gazed at him from a scant distance, her chocolate pools uncertain, seeking permission.  He was powerless to deny her.  He licked his lips, casting his eyes down to her rosy petals.  Subconsciously he shifted closer, his eyes remaining locked with hers as they lazily drifted shut. 

"Aack!  Miroku, what are you doing?!" 

"Be quiet, Shippou.  This is not something children should see." 

Those voices cascaded over Inuyasha like a bucket of ice water, instantly shattering the cocoon he and Kagome had cast around each other.  She pulled back so quickly that she fell flat on her rear end with a muffled thump.  Inuyasha clenched his fist, irrationally irate at being interrupted.  Had he been in the right frame of mind, he might have wondered why he was so disappointed at not being able to kiss Kagome.  But as it was, it was far too easy to give in to fury and leave such difficult questions for another day. 

"You bastards…"

Miroku and Shippou took that as their cue to make a hasty exit.  Not hasty enough, as it turned out, for both would go to sleep that night with lumps on their heads.  And if Shippou had been expecting Kagome to use the ‘osuwari’ command to rescue him, he was disappointed.  All things considered, the two of them had gotten off easy.  They should have quietly crept away as soon as things became more intimate, as Sango had done.  The taijiya had watched from afar, to be sure, but at least she had not inadvertently stomped all over the moment.  Perhaps the lumps would prove a valuable lesson for the future. 

Besides, Kagome was more than a little disappointed by the missed opportunity herself. 

* * *

Kagome breathed deeply of the crisp, clean air, tilting her head back to bask in the sun’s radiant caress.  She grinned and sighed in contentment.  It had been five days since her and Inuyasha’s near kiss, and things had more or less returned to normal.  They were journeying north in the hopes of catching wind of Naraku or more shard-animated walking corpses.  They’d had no luck in either department so far, but the group seemed to be in good spirits.  Nothing else had been said concerning the loss of her miko power, but Kagome took it as a very good sign that they were not heading directly for the well.  If Inuyasha intended to make her go home, why would he lead them on this potentially dangerous detour?  So now she was fairly certain that the hanyou shared Sango’s opinion on the matter.  She did, however, wish that she hadn’t chickened out the other night when she tried to ask him directly.  As a result, the persistent doubt swam continuously in the back of her mind and refused to go away. 

She was happy to note that she still retained the group’s piece of the Shikon no Tama.  Miroku had studied it and declared that he could sense no trace of impurity, so it was decided that it should remain in her care.  The monk would keep an eye on it and take it from her if necessary, but all believed that her pure heart would be enough unless an evil force began to work on it actively.  So far, that had not occurred.  The only time a youkai had attacked, Inuyasha and Sango had gone off to fight, with Miroku standing close by her side with his kazaana at the ready.  This was apparently how battles were going to go from now on, by unspoken agreement.  It was understood that Miroku was not to leave her side for any reason.  In turn, Inuyasha and Sango had appeared to fight more carefully than usual, probably because they did not want to present Miroku with the difficult choice of protecting Kagome or going to their aid.  In the end, the youkai had presented little challenge to the taijiya and hanyou.  Though Kagome did wonder how well this arrangement would work against stronger opponents. 

But that was a worry for another time.  For now, she just wanted to enjoy this beautiful day; one never knew when the next one would come along.  So she strolled down the path, not really paying attention to anything around her, until the small kitsune boy on her shoulder began to sniff furiously. 

"Kagome, you smell different." 

Had Kagome been paying attention, she might have noticed the hanyou at the head of the group freeze in his tracks and go rigid, even his ears standing erect.  But as it was, she only turned to the young fox and blinked at him. 

"Hm?  I do?"  At Shippou’s nod, she queried, "Is it a bad smell?" 

He shook his head.  "No, it’s just…strange." 

"Oh.  Well, I didn’t use a new shampoo or anything.  I wonder what it could be?" 

"Feh," came Inuyasha’s gruff voice.  "Any youkai with half a nose could tell you that you smell exactly the same.  The runt doesn’t know what the hell he’s talking about." 

Kagome glared at his back, since he hadn’t even bothered to turn around to throw insults at Shippou.  "Inuyasha!  Don’t be mean," she ordered, her tone carrying a threat of imminent dirt tasting.  "Shippou-chan has a good nose.  He just hasn’t learned how to use it fully yet.  He’s just a kid." 

"Keh.  Even a kid should know how to smell properly.  Any time he wants to learn, he can ask me." 

Kagome’s retort died on her lips as she and Shippou exchanged a look.  Had she really heard Inuyasha correctly?  Never in a million years would she expect him to offer to teach Shippou anything, let alone how to use his heightened senses.  She got the sneaking suspicion that something else was going on here.  Inuyasha’s offer was too out of the blue, too out of character for him.  But she also saw the hopeful light in Shippou’s eyes, and knew how much the offer meant to him.  If she questioned Inuyasha about his motives, it would be tantamount to looking a gift horse in the mouth.  And the opportunity for some quality bonding time between him and Shippou would be lost.  So whatever Inuyasha’s ulterior motives for this unusually generous proposal, she decided not to press him.  As long as he taught Shippou as promised, he could keep his secrets. 

"Go ahead, Shippou-chan," she said to the fox kit, who immediately jumped down from her shoulder and ran excitedly ahead to join Inuyasha.  Kagome watched them closely, keeping an eye out for any funny business. 

"Will you really teach me how to smell?" Shippou asked hopefully as he settled on the hanyou’s shoulder. 

Inuyasha sighed, not really looking forward to the task but knowing he was stuck.  Making that offer had been the only thing he could think of that would get the kit away from Kagome, so the two of them could talk, man to man.  A discussion made necessary because the idiot loved to blurt things out without thinking through the implications. 

"Will you shut up about Kagome’s scent?" Inuyasha demanded quietly, so only the kit would hear. 

"Oh, so she—" Shippou began, cutting himself off at the hanyou’s glare and continuing in a whisper.  "So she _does_ smell different." 

"Keh, ‘course she does." 

"Why?" 

"You gonna keep your damn mouth shut this time?" 

Shippou nodded vigorously, holding both hands over his lips to show his commitment.  Inuyasha sighed again, but there was nothing left to do except confess. 

"Kagome’s pregnant." 

Inuyasha was very glad that Shippou had covered his mouth, or the whole countryside might know by now.  As it was, the fox kit was able to contain himself—barely—though his eyes did widen like saucers.  Eventually he got over his initial shock and removed his hands. 

"From that night at the village?" he asked.  Inuyasha glanced at him, wondering how much the kid knew about sex.  Apparently enough to realize that it created babies.  You know, if the parents were really, _really_ unlucky. 

"Must be," he responded noncommittally. 

"Wow…that complicates things." 

Inuyasha grimaced.  _For once, kid, you and I are in complete agreement._  

"You know you have to tell her, right?" Shippou inquired dryly, as if speaking to a child. 

"Of course I know that!" the hanyou retorted irritably. 

"I could tell her for you if you’re too much of a coward," the kit teased. 

Inuyasha’s arm twitched as he fought the urge to reach up and pound a couple lumps into the little snot’s conceited skull.  But that would only send him running back to Kagome, which would likely result in two things: the ‘osuwari’ command, and far worse, Kagome learning of her ‘condition.’  Until he figured out when and how to tell her, he was going to have to be _nice_ to Shippou.  And the smug little shit knew it, too. 

Taking a deep breath, Inuyasha channeled all of his frustration into a little Shippou figurine he created within his mind.  He imagined placing his own special rosary around the haughty little face, then shouting the command over and over again until the runt-shaped crater extended about a kilometer down and the kit had ingested so much dirt that he had worms crawling out his ears.  That made him feel much better. 

"No," he told the kit, in a tone which indicated that the latter should stop his teasing or risk shattering the hanyou’s fragile restraint.  "It’s my responsibility.  I have to tell her." 

"So why not just do it now?" Shippou asked, honestly confused. 

"I-It’s not that simple!  Something like this, you have to find the right time.  You’re just a runt, so you wouldn’t understand." 

Shippou rolled his eyes.  Inuyasha was right; he didn’t understand.  Why did adults make things so complicated all the time?  If you knew something that someone else should really know, then you should just come right out and tell the person.  Procrastinating only made things worse. 

"Okay," he told Inuyasha uneasily.  "Just don’t wait too long.  You know she’ll find out on her own pretty soon." 

"Keh.  What am I, stupid?" 

* * *

**One Week Later**

Kagome knelt in the dirt, retching up her breakfast for the second time in as many days.  Yesterday, she had felt more or less fine for the rest of the day, so she thought it was simply a light case of food poisoning.  But now it was back, and her initial diagnosis was in doubt.  In her experience, food poisoning didn’t go away for twenty-four hours and then return with a vengeance.  There was something else going on here.  As soon as she was done vomiting, she would try to figure out what was wrong with her. 

"Sorry, Kagome-chan," Sango said from behind her as she rubbed her back.  "You’ve been sick on two straight mornings.  I wonder what kind of sickness that is."   

There was something about Sango’s statement which caused alarm bells to start ringing in Kagome’s head.  _Sick on two straight mornings…some kind of sickness…sickness…morning…sickness…_

She sat up suddenly with a gasp.  _Oh, no, it can’t be that._ Please _don’t let it be that_.  But the pieces were falling into place now.  Her _sickness_ in the _morning_ , her change in scent, how Shippou had never mentioned it again since Inuyasha had talked to him that day, and most damningly, her late period.  Now, her period had been late in the past on several occasions, so she hadn’t thought much of it this time either.  That was the naïve little girl in her, not considering that the explanation this time might be because she had sex with Inuyasha at exactly the _wrong_ time of the month. 

Slowly she turned to face the hanyou, whose eyes she was displeased to note were downcast and guilt-ridden.  Off to the side, Shippou could be seen shaking his head in exasperation.  But Kagome’s focus was on Inuyasha, his entire demeanor speaking of a man resigned to his fate.  She was petrified to ask the question, but desperation enabled her to push through her fear. 

"Inuyasha, am I…p-p—"

"Pregnant?" he supplied, his tone and refusal to make eye contact telling her everything she needed to know. 

The bile rose in Kagome’s throat once more, and this time when she heaved, a few rogue tears joined the contents of her stomach pouring out onto the grass. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Well, there you have it. I know many of you expected this. The original title for this chapter was “Unexpected Discoveries,” but that just didn’t seem to fit after half of the reviews predicted pregnancy, LOL. I knew it would be hard to make it a surprise, but I’m sure you noticed that I didn’t make any mention of possible pregnancy in the previous four chapters. Remember that just because I didn’t write about it doesn’t mean the characters didn’t consider the possibility. They did, but I left it ‘off camera.’ More explanation next chapter.


	6. Betrayal

Kagome sat with her arms wrapped around her raised knees, staring into the flickering flames.  It was not even noon yet, but Sango and Miroku had decided to set up a quick campsite.  They were preparing a hot lunch for everyone from Kagome’s bag, but she suspected that their real motive was to buy themselves some time to gather their thoughts before the impending group discussion.  The one where everyone decided what the hell they were going to do now.  That sounded like so much fun, she could hardly wait.  She had no idea where Inuyasha was.  Probably loitering around camp, just out of sight.  She was tempted to yell ‘osuwari’ and listen for the thud, but then she didn’t really want to see him at the moment. 

Kagome was _not_ happy with him.  He had obviously known she was pregnant for at least a week, since the day Shippou said she smelled differently, and probably longer.  And in all that time, do you think he could have done her the small courtesy of manning up and telling her?  _No_ , she had to find out _during_ her freaking morning sickness.  How could someone as valiant and fearless in battle be such a coward?  It wasn’t as though keeping silent was going to make this little problem of theirs go away!  Just how long did he think he could keep this from her?  Did he think that in a little over eight months the baby would pop out and she’d stupidly say ‘oh, look, a baby’?! 

The ‘osuwari’ was on the tip of her tongue now, but she managed to hold it back.  She was sure Inuyasha hadn’t intentionally left her in the dark.  It had probably been a case of procrastinating until it was too late.  That didn’t make it excusable, but it did limit his offense to simply being a baka.  Oh, yes, he was definitely a giant baka. 

But then, so was she.  Had Sango not suggested taking precautions against pregnancy the morning after she slept with Inuyasha?  Inside the hut, as she was helping her clean up, the taijiya had mentioned a special tea that could be brewed which stood a good chance of preventing pregnancy.  Unfortunately, Sango could not remember the exact recipe, and didn’t want to accidentally poison her friend.  That meant going to the village healer or flying back to Kaede’s village, either to talk to the old miko or obtain contraceptives from the modern era.  None of which appealed much to Kagome, in her hung-over state.  She had been so incredibly miserable that she rejected all proposals out of hand.  In doing so, she brushed off the very real possibility of pregnancy with an ‘it won’t happen to me’ attitude.  Now she wished that Sango had insisted, not that she blamed the taijiya.  She hadn’t exactly been pleasant to deal with at the time. 

By the time she felt like herself again, it was too late for any feudal era contraceptive to work.  That meant getting a morning-after pill from the modern era.  But she was pretty sure that required some sort of parental involvement since she was only fifteen—not a discussion she wanted to have with her mother.  So instead of doing the responsible thing, though difficult and awkward it might have been, she had taken the easy way out, falling back on her brilliant ‘it won’t happen to me’ idea.  She had never felt more like a dumb, naïve teenager than she did right now. 

That was what the teacher always said in health class, she reflected.  ‘It _can_ happen to you.  If you’re going to have sex, use protection.’  They had also discussed the various potential consequences of unprotected sex, principally STDs and pregnancy.  While Kagome wasn’t worried about the former given the identity of her partner, she was definitely concerned with the latter.  The phrase ‘ruin your life’ had been tossed around, mostly in the educational context.  Essentially, the responsibility of being a parent meant you couldn’t finish high school, go to college, or get a good job.  Your chances of marrying a halfway decent man apparently went down the toilet as well.  To say nothing of how it would affect one’s ability to traipse around feudal Japan, fighting youkai and collecting pieces of a pain-in-the-ass ancient jewel. 

This line of thought of course brought her around to the only preventative strategy left open to her: abortion.  She considered that for a few moments, then firmly rejected the idea.  It left a queasy feeling in the pit of her stomach which had nothing to do with morning sickness.  There was now a tiny future person growing inside her womb, and she didn’t think she could bring herself to snuff out its life just so hers could be better.  She hadn’t been raped, and the baby’s father wasn’t some stranger or a casual romantic interest.  It was Inuyasha, the man she loved and hoped to marry and raise a family with someday.  Besides, if those dreams came true for her, then she likely wouldn’t even need the higher education or well-paying job that this child would supposedly prevent her from obtaining.  Would her life really end up being ‘better’ without this child?  Would it bring her and Inuyasha closer together, or drive them apart? 

That was the million-dollar question, and of course she had no concrete answers at this stage.  The upcoming group discussion should at least tell her whether everyone was still willing to let her travel with them.  They had all agreed, explicitly or implicitly, that she could continue to do so despite her uselessness as a miko.  But if anything, pregnancy only made her _more_ helpless and vulnerable.  Later on, it would render her slow and clumsy, and probably pretty miserable to have as a traveling companion.  She would likely have to remain in her time for at least the third trimester, but the next four or five months were still up in the air.  If it was left to her, she would choose to stay with them and try to help accomplish the mission in any way she could.  But it really wasn’t her decision, since it would be their responsibility to take care of her as she grew bigger, moodier, and less mobile.  She would not force that burden on them against their will. 

Kagome continued to brood in silence for a few more minutes, feeling as though she was stuck in some sort of pseudo-reality.  This probably wouldn’t seem real to her for some time, maybe not until she saw the ultrasound or felt the first kick.  Part of her wanted to sink into denial, but that would just be foolish.  When had Inuyasha’s nose ever been wrong about anything?  And if her period failed to come and she _wasn’t_ pregnant, then there was potentially some other scary medical issue.  So no, she wouldn’t even entertain the possibility that Inuyasha was wrong.  That would be counterproductive; instead, she should focus on what do to moving forward.  As no doubt her friends were preparing to do. 

At last the food was ready.  Kagome gratefully took her cup from Miroku, practically drooling at the aroma.  She was ravenous after so violently losing her breakfast, but forced herself to eat at a steady pace.  Fortunately, her stomach accepted the nourishment happily and without complaint.  She knew that morning sickness could strike at any time of the day, but evidently hers was of the ‘classic’ variety.  At least that would make it easy to plan around if it kept up. 

"Inuyasha!" Sango called.  When said hanyou did not appear, she growled in frustration, not happy about being stuck holding his food.  Plus, they definitely needed him to participate in their dialogue.  "Where is that baka hanyou?" 

"Hold up a sec, Sango-chan," Kagome told her.  She inhaled deeply, then released everything in an ear-splitting shout. 

"OSUWARI!!!" 

The shocked masculine cry, immediately followed by a heavy, painful-sounding thud, was immensely satisfying to Kagome.  She didn’t bother to hide her pleased grin as she returned to her meal. 

Sango chuckled quietly to herself for a moment.  "Inuyasha, you’d better come quickly or she’ll probably do it again!"  Evidently, that would not be necessary.  "Oh, here he comes." 

"I might do it again anyway," Kagome stated, only half joking.  She was somewhat disappointed that Inuyasha had given in so easily. 

"I wouldn’t blame you," the taijiya told her.  "I’d probably give him at least one for every day he held out on you." 

Kagome found that idea very interesting.  Maybe she would try to get him a handful of times over the coming days.  It would be sweet indeed to elicit some more reactions like that, to catch him when he least expected it…

Miroku and Shippou exchanged a look, both shrinking back slightly from the sadistic glint in Kagome’s eye.  They naturally empathized with a fellow male, but Inuyasha was on his own for this one.  His action—or _in_ action—was pretty indefensible.  Besides, there are times in a man’s life when he knows that no good whatsoever will come from opening his mouth.  This was one of those times. 

Inuyasha plopped himself down at the campfire in a huff, as far away from Kagome as he could manage.  She didn’t particularly care if he was upset about the ‘osuwari.’  As far as she was concerned, he could take his indignation and shove it.  Fortunately, Inuyasha refrained from saying anything that would make matters worse.  Instead, he snatched the cup from Sango and inhaled the contents in about twenty seconds.  Then he tossed the cup into the fire, belched, and crossed his arms over his chest petulantly.  He looked every bit the teenager dragged somewhere he didn’t want to be, compete with upturned nose and snooty glare. 

All Kagome could do was shake her head and massage her temple.  _This_ was supposed to be the father of her child. 

Really? 

She could almost see them now, Inuyasha and a little miniature version of him, sitting and pouting at her with that exact same ‘why is Kagome so mean’ expression.  And suddenly she wondered if this experience would be like raising one child or two.  But she pushed away the sudden anxiety and tried to think positively.  Inuyasha was capable of acting like an adult; he just chose not to do so much of the time.  Hopefully fatherhood would speed up his incredibly sluggish maturation process. 

Besides, her little vision was likely more fantasy than reality for another reason.  This child was quarter-youkai, probably the first in history.  No one had any idea what it would look like.  Would it inherit Inuyasha’s ears, his looks, his claws, his unnatural strength?  What would its lifespan be?  It would certainly make sense that the human side would show through more than it did for Inuyasha, though the hanyou’s youki was so strong that she had a feeling the little one would be _very_ different from a normal human baby.  Her best guess, if she had to speculate, would be that the child would resemble a hanyou, only less powerful.  Its features would perhaps be less exceptional, and its time of vulnerability when the youki receded would probably be longer.  None of that truly mattered to Kagome; all she really wanted was a healthy, happy baby boy or girl. 

And when she began thinking about their baby, holding it in her arms for the first time, her heart swelled.  Despite the various threads of anxiety winding inside her head, on a purely emotional level her imagination left her solely with a feeling of warmth.  This was a product of her and Inuyasha’s love, after all.  Even if said love remained forever one-sided, and their relationship did not work out as she hoped, she and this child would have a future.  It would not ruin her life, though it would certainly set her off down a different path.  She knew she could always count on her family’s support.  And if she was never able to attend advanced schooling or land a lucrative job, there was always the shrine to fall back on.  The Higurashi family had a legacy, of which she was the rightful heir.  She could live at the shrine and work a menial job just to pay the bills, as countless single mothers had done before her.  Most importantly, her child would grow up safe and happy, knowing that it was loved by family members from three separate generations. 

And if the father was not in the picture, then that was a void she would just have to have work extra hard to fill.  She would tell her child stories of its father, his bravery and courage, and his caring heart.  And someday, when the child was old enough, she would tell the true tale of love and heartache, betrayal and healing that was Inuyasha’s past.  How that story ended remained to be seen.  Kagome certainly hoped for a happily-ever-after.  But it was comforting to know that even if her and Inuyasha’s relationship never bloomed to its full potential, she and her child would have a bright future. 

Her mood improved, she dared a glance at Inuyasha, whom she was surprised to find gazing at her contemplatively.  A moment later he noticed the eye contact and looked away, blushing lightly.  Kagome was more than a little perplexed by this behavior, and wondered what he had been thinking about.  But she didn’t way to pry.  He had apparently left his unjustified irritation behind him, and she did not want to inadvertently cause a relapse. 

Miroku too apparently sensed that emotions had settled, for he cleared his throat and spoke up. 

"Well, first of all I suppose congratulations are in order," he declared, somewhat hesitantly.  "Congratulations, Inuyasha, Kagome-sama," he said, bowing to each of them in turn.  Sango and Shippou nodded their agreement, but both looked fairly uncomfortable while doing it.  Inuyasha merely grunted but Kagome returned the bow.   

"Thank you, Miroku-sama." 

"Don’t mention it, Kagome-sama.  I meant what I said; even here, I believe we all feel a certain sense of joy at the conception of your child.  However, I believe that you will all agree with me when I caution that this situation is…complicated."  Of course, no one disagreed.  "So the question which confronts us is this: where do we go from here?" 

Silence reigned for several moments, as each member of the Inu-gang reflected privately.  Eventually, Miroku resumed his role as leader of the discussion. 

"The way I see it, we have two options.  First, we could continue on our quest as if nothing has changed, heading north in search of Naraku.  Or second, we could return to Kaede-sama’s village for a short while, to allow Kagome-sama to consult with her family." 

To Kagome’s surprise, no one objected or complained that there should be a third option—namely, her staying in her time for the foreseeable future.  Even Inuyasha’s facial expression indicated complete agreement with Miroku as to the decision to be made.  And she knew that the monk’s phrase ‘to consult with her family’ was not a polite euphemism for ‘remain behind.’  Miroku honestly thought she might want to discuss this matter with her family, which she realized was probably a good idea.  But crucially, he was leaving it up to Kagome to decide what _she_ wanted to do, after talking about it with all the people who mattered to her.  Including the individuals sitting around this campfire right now. 

Kagome blinked back a few tears, sniffling once.  No one questioned the reason for her display of emotion, not even Inuyasha.  Shippou hopped into her lap, and she hugged him gratefully.  This show of solidarity was nothing short of amazing to Kagome.  Her friends all valued her company so much, that they would be willing to throw rationality to the winds just to keep her by their sides.  As long as she wanted to stay, she was welcome.  She loved them all, so much. 

"I would like to stay," Kagome stated, softly but with conviction.  "I want to help all of you for as long as I can." 

Miroku and Sango smiled in relief, and Shippou hugged her arm tighter.  Somewhat disconcertingly, however, Inuyasha kept his expression stony and neutral, giving nothing way. 

"I’m glad, Kagome-chan," the taijiya told her.  "The pregnant women in my village could continue about their daily lives without a problem for most of the term, but none of them ever left the village.  There will come a time when it will be too uncomfortable for you to travel.  We probably have four to five months left before that happens.  We’ll just have to make sure we kill Naraku in that time," she declared firmly, pounding her fist into her hand. 

"Agreed," Miroku interjected.  "So then the issue becomes whether we return to the village now, or continue heading north." 

Kagome shrugged.  "I’d like to see my family, but it doesn’t have to be right now.  Do you think we’re close to finding a lead?" 

"It’s impossible to know for sure," Sango replied.  "We could find something tomorrow, or not for a whole lunar cycle." 

"Let me ask you this, Kagome-sama," Miroku said.  "What would the average pregnant woman be doing right now in your time?" 

Kagome considered that for a moment.  "Probably trying to set up her first prenatal appointment."  When all she got was blank looks, she hastened to explain.  "Prenatal care is special medical care for pregnant women.  In my time, there are doctors that specialize in it, and they say every pregnant woman should see one.  I guess it makes the pregnancy run smoother and helps to detect problems ahead of time." 

Miroku nodded.  "I expected as much.  And your time also has advanced medical care to help with the delivery as well, correct?" 

"Yeah.  Most people nowadays go to the hospital to deliver, so they can get good treatment quickly in case there’s an emergency." 

"So would you like to return to your time now so you can start getting this ‘prenatal’ treatment, Kagome-sama?" 

Kagome’s first thought, oddly enough, was to wonder whether her mother’s health insurance covered prenatal care for a dependent.  She was sure her mother wouldn’t care either way; she would want her daughter to have prenatal care, even if they had to dip into her college fund to pay for it.  Now that she thought about it, she definitely wanted modern medical care throughout her pregnancy, a decision which Miroku had obviously been trying to lead her into.  But that didn’t answer the question of _when_.  Should they head for the village now or spend some more time looking for Naraku first?  The answer came from a most unexpected source. 

"Let’s head back now." 

To the speaker all eyes turned, wide with shock. 

"What?!" Inuyasha demanded defensively.  Miroku was the first to recover from his astonishment. 

"I-it’s nothing, Inuyasha.  We were just surprised to hear that from you." 

"Keh," the hanyou answered gruffly, re-crossing his arms over his chest.  "Do you people have any idea how dangerous it is to get knocked up?  Women die in childbirth all the time!  I bet a lot less people die in Kagome’s time, right?"

Kagome nodded, still not quite believing her ears.  "T-t-that’s true.  Mortality rates among infants and mothers are much lower in my time." 

"There, you see!  Kagome should have the best medical care from start to finish." 

The way he said it, with absolute conviction and not even attempting to hide his concern, left Kagome truly touched.  He didn’t care how much of an inconvenience it was, or how many times she would have to go back to her time.  He just wanted the best for her and their baby.  This was the Inuyasha she wanted to father her child, the confident man who was not afraid to show how much he cared, and knew exactly what his priorities were.  He didn’t even spare a relatively minor concern like catching Naraku a second thought.  It was truly amazing how quickly Inuyasha could shift between the two extreme versions of himself, child and adult, or to something in between. 

"Thank you, Inuyasha," was all she said, but her adoring tone caused his cheeks to color, and he seemed to lose some of his confidence.  An observation confirmed when Miroku spoke up next. 

"Yes, Inuyasha, a very wise and considerate decision." 

Inuyasha reacted to praise as he always did, with embarrassment and a hasty attempt to cover his true motives. 

"K-keh.  We ain’t likely to find Naraku if we keep going, anyway.  That bastard hides until he’s ready to be found." 

That was true enough, but nobody was buying his excuse, least of all Kagome.  But since he had made such a mature, thoughtful decision, they would let him off the hook. 

"Then it’s settled.  Shall we get started heading south again?" 

"One moment, Miroku-sama," Kagome interrupted reluctantly.  There was one little issue she feared that Inuyasha had not thought through yet.  "Inuyasha, you know that going back to my time means telling my mother about what happened, don’t you?  And don’t even _think_ about saying that I have to tell her myself.  This is your responsibility too." 

The sheepish look which briefly passed over the hanyou’s features indicated that he would have told her exactly that.  And likely earned himself a nice ‘osuwari’ for his trouble.  Escape route firmly closed, he next tried to convince himself that his newfound ‘responsibility’ wasn’t so bad. 

"Might as well get it over with, I guess," he declared with a sigh.  "She would figure it out pretty soon anyway.  And it’s not like your mom will disown you." 

"No," Kagome answered after a brief hesitation.  "She probably won’t even get that mad.  I just know she’ll be extremely disappointed in me."  And that would be worse than all the anger her mother could possibly conjure up.   

"W-well, just tell her it was all my fault.  I’m tough.  I can take it."

Kagome had to crack a smile.  Here was her selfless Inuyasha again, willing to throw himself under the proverbial bus for her sake.  She wouldn’t allow it, but appreciated the offer nonetheless. 

"No, I don’t want that.  If I lied to save face, I’d just be disappointed in myself.  We’re in this together, Inuyasha.  Okay?" 

His eyes widened at her statement.  Perhaps he realized that she was referring to much more than dealing with her family.  She would probably never know exactly what was going through his head in that moment.  But when he nodded resolutely, with an air of solemnity, she felt that he was making a promise, to her and to himself.  Now, if only she could have plucked up the courage to ask what it was. 

But the moment passed quickly.  Miroku and Sango stood to break down camp, and Shippou asked if he could have a stick of pocky.  She considered refusing, but gave in.  It wasn’t Shippou’s fault that Inuyasha had procrastinated, and it really hadn’t been the kit’s responsibility to tell her.  Given what she had learned about the hanyou this afternoon, however, she knew that she had already forgiven him.  He would not be receiving any retaliatory ‘osuwari’ in the coming days.  Instead, she would see if she could rekindle the relationship they’d enjoyed before the mysterious creature’s attack a week ago.  If they could go back to being happy and carefree, even for a short time, it would do wonders for both of them.   

* * *

A couple days later, Kagome was forced to come to terms with the reality that she wasn’t going to get her wish.  Apparently, being carefree and being pregnant did not mix, for either parent.  She certainly would not characterize herself as ‘free of care.’  Her emotions were still chaotically mixed, an amalgam of regret, excitement, and worry.  She could never seem to settle on one before another reared up and sent her off on a whole new mental tangent.  As a result, she had been distracted and less sociable than usual, though at least her other friends seemed to understand. 

Inuyasha had been the same way, to an even greater extent.  Withdrawn to the point of barely saying a few words to anyone over the course of the day, he seemed to be merely going through the motions of reality.  He was probably even more conflicted and confused than she was.  She would have given anything to have to break up a fight with Shippou, or ‘osuwari’ him for being a jerk.  Anything to prove that he still possessed his old brash confidence, one of the things which had drawn her to him in the first place.  As she got to know him, of course, she discovered how insecure and sensitive he was under that hard exterior.  That had only pulled her in deeper.  And just as she had been closer than ever to solving the complex emotional puzzle that was Inuyasha, the consequences of one night of recklessness sent them back to square one.  Or so it had seemed for the past two days.  Once Inuyasha had gotten his head around their mutual predicament, he would open up to her again.  She hoped. 

That evening, she decided to do something to get Inuyasha—and herself—out of their respective funks.  The other day she had discovered a set of _hanafuda_ cards in a hidden pocket of her bag.  How they had gotten there, she had no idea, but the game would hopefully provide a welcome distraction for the group.  _Hanafuda_ cards were old, but probably not old enough so her friends from the past would have seen them.  But if she and Souta could learn as kids, then so could these adults from the past.  She had no concerns whatsoever about Inuyasha’s ability; he was more intelligent than he let on.  Shippou was young, but she was confident that he would get it too.  Once she had retrieved the cards, she clapped her hands together brightly, startling everyone. 

"Okay, gather around!  I’m going to teach you guys how to play a game." 

Shippou perked up immediately.  "A game from your time, Kagome?" the kit asked, tail twitching with excitement.  Kagome could see the wheels turning in his head; he didn’t even know what the game was yet, but he already wanted to beat the pants off everyone.  Under other circumstances, she might have expected the same type of reaction from Inuyasha, who was also highly competitive.  The hanyou did not react that way this time, but he was eyeing her with mild interest.  She would take it.  It was a damn sight better than brooding in sullen silence. 

Her friends formed into a circle and she dealt the cards, face-up so she could describe the rules and the significance of each card.  She was just explaining the difference between normals and special cards when everything went to hell. 

Her breath caught in her throat.  _No, please, not now.  Why now?!_   But the shinidamachu circling overhead was not going to vanish into thin air, no matter how much she wanted it to.  If only Kikyou had appeared later, or even before the discovery of her pregnancy.  In either case, Inuyasha might not have been such an emotional wreck.  And neither would she, for that matter. 

"Go," she told him, voice cracking with the effort.  She stared down at the grass, knowing that if she looked into his eyes, staring sadly back at her, she would lose her resolve and beg him to stay.  The naïve little girl in her wilted, the part of her which had believed her pregnancy would change their relationship for the better.  A fool’s hope.  Truly, the only constant which had ever existed between them was Kikyou.  She was always there, even before her resurrection, preventing Inuyasha from moving on and acting on the feelings Kagome still hoped were in there, somewhere.  And here she was again, once more pulling Inuyasha away, physically and emotionally.  Kagome accepted the place Kikyou would always hold in his heart, but that did not make her visits any easier to deal with. 

Eventually, she heard the soft, unhurried footfalls indicating Inuyasha’s departure from camp.  When he was gone, she heaved a broken sigh and dried the few tears which had escaped past her eyelids. 

"Um…you know, Kagome-chan, I’m kind of tired tonight," Sango declared, trying and failing to keep her tone casual.  "Maybe you could teach us this game another time?" 

"Yes, it is fairly late," Miroku observed, looking around and blinking as if he was having trouble seeing in the barely-fading light.  Even Shippou nodded, scooting closer to her with wide, concerned eyes. 

Kagome managed a sincere, sad smile.  "Thanks, guys," she said, genuinely grateful.  The last thing she wanted to do right now was play a game.  In fact, she considered asking Kirara to take her home.  But she knew that she would never be able to sleep unless she saw Inuyasha return to camp.  How long would he and Kikyou stay together?  Would he be able to look her in the eye when he returned?  These questions and more taunted her, luring her in like a moth to flame.  And though she knew she would burn, she had to stick around for the answers. 

* * *

Inuyasha trudged through the forest, feeling thoroughly sick to his stomach.  This was quite possibly the most guilt-ridden he had ever been in his life.  He had gotten a girl pregnant, his best friend no less, and was now strolling off to meet another woman.  A woman his pregnant friend was deeply insecure about.  Yep, he was dirt, plain and simple.  He would do Kagome the courtesy of trying to keep his rendezvous with Kikyou short.  It wasn’t like they had much to talk about these days, anyway.  And Kagome had been barely holding herself together back at camp, unable to even look at him.  He knew he was dragging her feelings for him—whatever those might be—through the mud, and felt terrible for it.  But the trouble was that if he refused to go see Kikyou, then he would feel guilty for an entirely different reason.  Whatever might be said of the dead miko, he had to go to her when she called.  He owed her that much at least. 

He found her reclining upon the low-hanging bough of an ancient maple tree, her vivid red hakama standing in stark contrast to the soft, pinkish hues of the fading leaves.  She opened her eyes as he approached, and slid down to land softly among the leaf litter.  He drew to a halt before her, keeping his expression guarded as she regarded him silently.  Then she looked away, revealing a small, sad smile. 

"Inuyasha…you came," she observed quietly, with an air of astonishment. 

"Don’t I always?" he replied, bewildered.  His heart thundered in his chest.  But Kikyou could not possibly know the reason he had considered refusing her summons this evening.  And whatever the cost, he had to prevent her from finding out.  Eventually he would have to tell Kikyou about Kagome’s condition, the child he had sired, but not tonight.  Now was not the right time.  If the secret was revealed this evening, the only thing he could foresee was disaster. 

"Indeed, you do," she admitted.  "Though as of late, my doubt grows stronger each day." 

"I will always come, Kikyou," he told her sincerely, in a clipped tone tinged with annoyance.  Had he given her any reason to doubt his loyalty in the past?  Even now, he was here when he really didn’t want to be, when every thread of conscience he possessed was telling him how much of an ass he was for leaving.  Kagome was likely growing more depressed by the second back and camp.  He hoped they could wrap this up soon. 

Kikyou nodded, but otherwise ignored his words.  "So, have you had any fortune in discovering Naraku’s location?" 

"No," he replied quickly, grateful for the change of subject.  He considered telling Kikyou about the animated corpse they had fought, but decided against it.  The explanation would take too long, and he didn’t really want Kikyou to find Naraku anyway.  It would be better for her, and for his peace of mind, if she stayed as far away from the dark hanyou as possible. 

"I see.  So you have no leads at all as to—"

"We don’t, Kikyou." 

She narrowed her eyes, and Inuyasha realized his mistake.  There was a fine line between surreptitiously moving the conversation along, and making it too obvious that you were doing so.  Evidently, he had inadvertently crossed that line. 

"You seem anxious tonight, Inuyasha," Kikyou observed with an edge of suspicion.  "I trust all is well?" 

She took a step closer to him, peering into his eyes, and Inuyasha had to fight the urge to fall back.  Instead, he met her gaze straight on, willing his expression into neutrality. 

"Fine, Kikyou.  I’m…I’m fine.  Nothing’s wrong." 

"Really?" she asked, her tone indicating disbelief.  "And how fares my reincarnation?" 

"K-Kagome’s fine, too." 

"Fine?"

"Yeah, she’s…fine." 

For several heartbeats, Inuyasha feared she was going to press him further.  But after studying him intently for what seemed a small eternity, she turned away. 

"Very well, then.  I shall take my leave.  Until we meet again, Inuyasha." 

In moments, she was gone, borne off into the night by her shinidamachu.  Inuyasha released the breath he’d been holding, tilting his head back and rubbing his neck as relief flooded his system.  Kikyou had apparently bought his lame-ass attempt at covering up his earlier anxiousness, a miracle as far as he was concerned.  Kami, he was a moron.  But then, conversation had never been his strong suit.  Evidently, lying wasn’t either.  But Kikyou had accepted his words, which was all that mattered.  That, and the fact that it hadn’t taken very long.  Hopefully, Kagome would not be too upset with him. 

Still, he couldn’t shake the feeling that something was amiss.  The answer struck him as soon as he turned to make his way back to camp.  The direction in which Kikyou had soared off…was the same way he was now facing. 

"Shit!" he cried, sprinting through the trees as fast as his legs could carry him.  But with a sinking feeling in his gut, he knew he would be too late.  He had failed.  The confrontation he dreaded above all others was about to take place, and there was nothing he could do to stop it.   

* * *

Kagome stared transfixed, her gaze drawn inexorably to the twin pools of swirling blackness no matter how strongly she wanted to look away.  Those eyes, darkened with malice, seemed to probe deep within her.  It felt as though her very soul was on display, exposed to that cruel gaze, an icy wind which cut her to the bone.  The pure, unadulterated hate sent shivers coursing up and down her spine, goose bumps rising on her bare skin.  At times in the past, those eyes had reflected only sorrow and emptiness, as lifeless as the body housing them.  Now, however, they burned with loathing, an unquenchable firestorm of rage.  Powerless before such fury, Kagome gulped and waited for the licking flames to reach her, like a maiden bound at the stake. 

"So, Kagome, this is how you seek to replace me." 

Her voice was just as frightening.  Low and steady, but resonating with the same intense hatred, it shook Kagome to her very core.  She could barely muster the mental capacity to breathe; her words utterly failed her.  Kikyou waited a few moments for an answer which was not forthcoming, then smoothly drew and nocked an arrow, aiming it squarely at her reincarnation’s chest. 

"I should kill you now," she declared, voice rising with unrestrained emotion.  "It was a mistake that I did not end your miserable existence and reclaim my soul as soon as I was revived.  A mistake I should rectify." 

But though her eyes narrowed, her grip on the arrow remained firm.  The string was drawn taut, but the projectile was not released.  The silence crawled on, broken only by the growing sound of hurried footfalls.  This was the scene which greeted Inuyasha as he burst onto the scene a few moments later.  Kikyou with Kagome dead in her sights and intent to kill oozing from her being.  The rest of his companions frozen off to the side, afraid to move.  The hanyou did likewise, lest he cause the infinitesimal amount of muscle activity required to release that arrow.  It was all on Kikyou now; the decision was hers and hers alone. 

She lowered the bow.  In an instant, Inuyasha had placed himself protectively in front of Kagome, shielding her from any further threat.  He growled low, but resisted the urge to draw Tetsusaiga.  Even now, Kikyou was quietly returning the arrow to its quiver and slinging the bow over her shoulder.  Much of her violent aura had diminished, replaced principally by sorrow.  Finally, head lowered, whether in sadness or shame, she spoke. 

"I could not do it," she whispered.  Then her head came up, fire once more burning in her eyes as they seemed to bore straight through Inuyasha to glare at the quivering girl behind him. 

"You deserve to die!" she exclaimed vehemently.  "But…I cannot bring myself to harm an innocent."  Her last words were delivered with equal parts regret and disappointment. 

At last, Inuyasha found his tongue.  "Kikyou, wha—"

"Do not take me for a fool, Inuyasha," the miko snarled, spitting out his name as though it tasted foul on her tongue.  "That twinge of youki in her belly does not lie.  Nor does it seem unfamiliar.  At least do me the courtesy of admitting to what you have done." 

Inuyasha fumbled for a response, in large part because he had never seen Kikyou this furious before.  Even her voice and expressions as she sealed him to the Goshinboku and immediately after her resurrection could not compare to the wrath currently rolling off her in waves. 

"Nothing to say?" Kikyou demanded.  "I should have expected as much from a creature without any shred of honor." 

Inuyasha flinched as if struck, head snapping to the side.  He could almost feel the stinging slap against his cheek.  He shrunk back, like a beaten child.  If anything, his reaction only goaded Kikyou further. 

"Was it nice, Inuyasha?  Having a young, nubile body to keep you warm at night?  A wet, willing cunt to sate your animal lust upon?  Did you even try to make love as a man, or did you simply rut her like a beast?" 

Kagome gasped, her innate protectiveness of Inuyasha welling within her.  It was one thing for Kikyou to threaten her, or condemn her as deserving of death.  It was another to demean Inuyasha’s hanyou heritage, which never failed to boil her blood.  Especially when such degradation was completely unjustified. 

"K-Kikyou," she said quietly, having not quite found her voice yet.  "It’s not what you—"

It happened so fast.  With Inuyasha dumbfounded into a stupor, all Kikyou had to do was take one step to the side, nocking an arrow as she went.  The projectile impacted the tree less than half a meter above Kagome’s head, pulling a shocked squeak from the girl, her temporary bravado driven to the winds by the murderous intent raging from her opponent once more. 

"Do not _lie_ , you shameless slattern!" Kikyou snarled, the last of her composure seeming to desert her.  "Do not think that I am ignorant of one truly responsible for Inuyasha’s betrayal.  When a pretty girl dresses like a whore, she must be advertising herself as such.  And when a pretty whore spreads her legs, what man can resist?  You lured him in with your body, then attempted to snare him with the one thing this cursed form of mine can never produce.  But you will fail.  Inuyasha will remain loyal to me!

"Inuyasha," she pleaded, a clear attempt at sweetness which instead came out painfully coarse.  "This fallen woman sought to deceive you, to trap you by becoming pregnant with your child.  But she has miscalculated.  She thought she was pure enough to defy the laws of nature, but she was wrong.  Now her power as a miko must surely have deserted her, rendering her as useless as any common harlot with a whelp in her belly.  Do not fall into her ploy.  Come with me.  We shall complete the Shikon no Tama, destroy Naraku, and journey to the afterlife.  We shall be together, as we were meant to be." 

Kagome’s world narrowed, shrinking to the two individuals directly in front of her, the miko and the hanyou.  Nothing else mattered.  She waited with bated breath, staring at Inuyasha’s back, trying to read his body language for any clue as to what is answer might be.  The signs were not encouraging.  His shoulders were slumped, his posture depressed, lacking in any sort of conviction.  His hands, often clenched into fists during times of tension, instead hung limply by his sides.  No matter how Kagome looked at it, his bearing was one of surrender.  Her heart grew heavier with each passing second, as more and more doubt took hold in her consciousness.  Then, at long last, he spoke, without raising his head. 

"I…I can’t do that, Kikyou." 

The miko scoffed, covering fresh hurt with renewed aggression.  "Of course you can’t," she repeated in a mocking tone.  "Not when saddled with your pregnant whore." 

Since Inuyasha’s back was to her, Kagome missed the way his eyes widened at Kikyou’s statement, or how he opened his mouth to protest.  As it was, Kikyou resumed speaking before he could find the words, and all Kagome could gather from the exchange was more passive acceptance on his part. 

"I do understand your position, Inuyasha," Kikyou told him, a small amount of respect taking the edge off her harsh tone.  "You have enough honor to take on this burden, at least.  Very well, then.  I shall take my leave.  I will even be generous.  Feel free to continue your fornications.  They do not matter.  Just remember, Inuyasha, each time you find yourself fucking your little paramour.  Remember that your life belongs to me.  When Naraku is defeated and all things which should not be in this world have vanished, you and I will join one another in the afterlife." 

Then, she was gone.  Kagome watched until the glow of the shinidamachu vanished overhead.  Silence returned to the camp, the most oppressive stillness she had ever known.  She closed her eyes, oddly wishing for the thing which had first set her down the path to this moment of utter heartbreak.  Sake would numb her pain, give her a dreamless sleep, and perhaps even make her forget this horrible night.  What she wouldn’t give for another blackout.  But that would be too easy; the nearest drop of alcohol was likely kilometers away.  And she simply did not possess the energy to accomplish the movements of her legs necessary to walk, or even to stand.  Instead she crawled listlessly over to her sleeping bag and lay down upon the soft fabric. 

She sensed Inuyasha’s eyes upon her, but the only sound he made was a soft curse.  Then he too was gone, storming noisily into the forest. 

Kagome stared blankly into the fire, feeling nothing. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Wow, I kind of surprised myself with how vicious Kikyou was. If she seemed to be behaving irrationally or contradicting herself, it was intentional. I think that’s what most of us do when we’re crazy mad/hurt, lash out at everyone regardless of how much sense we make. Kikyou is only human, after all. 
> 
> Also, please note that I am not trying to make a pro-life statement with this chapter. Leaving my own personal beliefs completely out of it, I just think that Kagome is the type of person who would choose to have the baby, especially since Inuyasha is the father. 
> 
> Finally, a side note on abortion in Japan. According to my limited research, it is officially illegal, but there are several broad exceptions that make abortions fairly common and more or less socially accepted. So it’s reasonable for Kagome, who doesn’t really know the laws, to think that she could get an abortion if she wanted one.


	7. Promise

Inuyasha swore colorfully, his claws tearing through bark and wood. He had exhausted his extensive vocabulary of obscenities long ago and was starting to repeat himself. Over a dozen relatively young trees lay freshly mangled, dying in his wake. The larger ones had escaped with deep gouges, though whether they would survive the damage he neither knew nor cared. Finally an exceptionally old, broad trunk loomed up before him. Snarling, he closed his hand into a fist and threw his full weight behind the strike. Again and again he punched the hapless inanimate object, until a dark stain of blood sat in the center of a crater of splintered, pulverized wood. Finally, instincts of self-preservation forced him to stop. Some of his fingers were surely broken, but no lasting damage had been done. The pain felt good. He deserved it.

It did not, however, do anything to alleviate his shame. He was ashamed of Kikyou, of the cruel witch she had become, but mostly he was ashamed of himself. Why had he stood feebly by while Kikyou spouted such hurtful, piercing drivel? Why hadn’t he put a stop to it before his sweet, innocent Kagome had been so brutally wounded? He hadn’t even prevented Kikyou from firing an arrow in her direction; Kagome could have been _killed_ , with her protector standing not two meters from her. When had he ceased to be a man? Where on earth had he left his manhood? He had eventually tried to get a word in, but Kikyou interrupted him. And instead of telling her to shut up for a minute, he had allowed her misinterpretation of his words to go uncorrected. His lack of testicular fortitude was nothing short of disgusting.

And now here he was, taking his self-loathing out on innocent trees when he should be trying to find his fucking _balls_ or bash some sense into his brainless skull. Or better yet, apologizing to Kagome and explaining that what she thought she knew was dead wrong. He shuddered involuntarily, recalling her appearance afterwards. Her body, limp as it lay on her sleeping bag, her breathing slow and deep. Her eyes, normally bright, shining not with anger or even sadness, but reflecting only a terrifying void. They had been _empty_ , of all emotion or care. He had never seen her look so completely crushed, so utterly defeated.

He slammed his fist into the tree again, just to feel that satisfying surge of pain once more. He knew what he had to do now. A sense of desperation took root within, a need to forever banish that terrible emptiness from her expression and return Kagome to being _Kagome_. He only hoped that it was not already too late. She possessed a remarkable capacity to forgive, but even she would have difficulty healing from this.

He took his time meandering back to camp, desperation temporarily restrained by fear, fear that she would reject him or that he would screw this up. Heartfelt conversation had never been his strong suit. He had done it after that cursed night in the village, but the stakes back then seemed to pale in comparison to what they were now. But as he had told himself that evening, it had to be done. And eventually, he gathered up the willpower to overcome his dread and gingerly creep back into camp.

Evidently, he had been gone longer than he thought. Everyone except Kagome was sleeping, which he decided was a good thing. He guessed that the others had tried to make her feel better, but had eventually given up. Even now, she was simply lying on her back, gazing vacantly up at the canopy. But perhaps what scared him most of all was the disturbing absence of the scent of her tears in the air. Kagome had always cried when she felt sad. What this suggested, instead, was the inability to feel anything at all. His Kagome was fading before his very eyes.

He barely managed to restrain himself from charging over and shaking her fiercely. But the only thing that would accomplish would be to wake up all of their friends. And if he had any chance of fixing this, he needed it to be just the two of them. So he settled for a quick tip-toe across camp, then quietly knelt beside her. She made no move to acknowledge him, even when he whispered her name and waved a hand across her vision. Next he moved to gently shake her shoulder, but gasped as soon as his fingers came into contact with the distressingly cold fabric of her blouse. Alarmed, he grasped her hand and felt that her skin was just as chilled. A sudden gust of wind blew past, causing the fire to hiss and flicker in protest. Fresh goose bumps rose on Kagome’s bare legs, and a shiver passed through her. There was a blanket lying to her side, probably courtesy of Sango or Miroku, but it had become dislodged somehow and she had made no effort to replace it.

He nearly cried out in despair when her hand withdrew from his own, but she had only brought both arms to huddle against her chest. She gazed at him now, her expression one of discomfort due to the cold but otherwise maintaining its neutrality. Her eyes revealed neither gladness to see him nor loathing. Torn between berating her and running off to the woods for some more self-inflicted punishment, Inuyasha instead snatched up the discarded blanket. Rather than covering her with it, he folded it over a couple times. Then he gingerly picked up the fox kit sleeping at Kagome’s side and deposited him into the hastily-made bed, covering him with the top half of the blanket. To Inuyasha’s endless relief, Shippou stirred but did not wake. Then he slid his arm under Kagome’s shoulders and lifted her gently, like the precious being that she was. In a matter of seconds he had her inside the sleeping bag, zipped to the top so only from her nose to the top of her head was showing. Still she watched him, revealing no emotion.

Inuyasha wanted to pull his hair out. These blank, un-Kagome-like looks had to _stop!_ They were going to drive him insane if they continued for much longer. But they were his fault, and his responsibility to cure. To do that, he needed to find a quiet place where he would be comfortable talking to her. And the direction which he finally chose was not north, south, east or west, but one which had always brought him safety and comfort, starting when he was a mere child. It was _up._

He thought he heard a soft intake of breath from Kagome when he picked her up bridal-style in his arms. She made no other sound as he made his way up a tall tree overlooking the campsite, leaping from limb to limb with practiced ease even burdened with his precious cargo. Finally, he settled with his back to the trunk on the highest branch capable of supporting their combined weight, and placed her in his lap. He clutched her closely to his chest, more tightly than he intended. But there was something soothing in the feel of her in his arms, especially her lack of protest. She gazed at him now with confusion swimming in her dark orbs, but even that was a vast improvement from before. He swallowed nervously, but knew it was time. He opened his mouth to say what he needed to say…

And failed. He tried once, twice, thrice, but each time his tongue faltered. He growled inwardly, wanting to slam his head against the trunk. Why did her eyes paralyze him so? Why couldn’t he utter the words he felt in his heart? Why did he have no idea where to begin? Finally he gave up, looking down at the darkness below as he tried to gather his thoughts in preparation for another attempt.

"I’ll go home."

He jolted at the sound of her voice, nearly sending both of them toppling from their perch. He looked at her, and was both pleased and dismayed to find her gazing at him sadly. But this was real, crushing sadness, and at first he found himself unable to process her words. Then the wheels began turning. She would go home. The rest was unspoken, but clear as day. This would not be a short visit with her family, or even a longer stay because she was upset. This would be permanent, final. If he assented to her declaration, he would watch her vanish at the bottom of the well and never see her again.

"The hell you will!" he growled, surprising both of them with the vehemence of his response. His breath came in short, shallow bursts, as he fought against the rising panic within him. He could not let Kagome leave. It didn’t matter why he needed her so badly, but he felt it down to his very soul. If he let her go home, never to return, the best part of him would wither and die. He would regret it to the end of his days.

For Kagome’s part, she had initially shrunk back from his fierce tone and the fear in his eyes, but this was not a decision she took lightly. She had danced around it for a long time, ignoring her friends as they tried to cheer her up. Ignoring even the cold until Inuyasha snapped her back to reality. But inexorably, she had come to the correct conclusion. Kikyou had not been right about everything, but the older miko’s words carried profound truths. Regardless of whether she had intended to ensnare Inuyasha by becoming pregnant, regardless of whether she had ever advertised herself for him or anyone else, the end result was exactly what Kikyou had professed. She was nothing but a useless, soiled woman now. And Inuyasha would be better off without her, despite his initial resistance to said truth.

"Please, Inuyasha," she pleaded, not wanting one of her final memories of him to be a terrible fight. "You have to see the truth. Kikyou was right. You should let me go home and complete the Shikon no Tama with her. Then you—"

"Stop it," he demanded, voice cracking with desperation.

"No! You need to listen to reason. I’m just a burden now, and—"

"So what if you’re a burden!"

Kagome gasped, suddenly unsure how to feel. Her chest throbbed with a fresh pang of anguish, but she was glad he had admitted the truth. Or had he? His words and expression were at odds, and all she could do was wait for him to clarify.

Inuyasha groaned, knocking the back of his head against the trunk for real this time. How was it that he could consistently say the right thing in a way which was so appallingly _wrong?_ Did it even count as ‘saying the right thing’ anymore? Probably not, he reflected, which is why his tongue set to hastily fumbling over itself to explain.

"Kagome, that’s not—I mean, you’re not…" He trailed off. What good was it to deny his statement? It was true, and they both knew it. But that didn’t make it _right_ , either.

"Ah, screw it. Yes, Kagome, you are a burden." He almost faltered at the hurt which materialized in her gaze, but pressed on. "You…you really _are_ a burden sometimes. All of you are. I can’t travel as fast as I could by myself. I end up having to rescue one or more of you in just about every battle. And we have to stop every fucking night to fucking _sleep_. So. _What?_ I don’t give a flying shit about all that. It doesn’t mean I don’t want you guys with me! I need you!"

Here he paused, as if realizing what he had just admitted. But it was true, and with the hurt gradually receding from her expression, her beautiful eyes softening in understanding, he saw no reason to deny it.

"I need you. You, Kagome. You most of all. If you left me…I don’t know what I would do. Please, _please_ don’t go!"

He realized he was begging like some pathetic fool, but he didn’t care. It didn’t matter that this was the most vulnerable he had ever allowed himself to be. The only person to bear witness was the one who held his absolute trust, the one he needed more than any other. If he failed to convince her to stay, nothing else mattered. Maintaining his foolish pride would be no consolation at all, so he threw it away along with anything else that had kept him from being truly honest with her before. It was freeing in a way, to see his distraught, pitiful visage reflected in her moistening brown orbs. The scent of her tears wrapped around him like a soothing blanket, and his heart jumped with every quiver of her bottom lip. And as life returned to her face, as Kagome became _Kagome_ again, he felt the icy grip of despair finally leave him.

In the next moment, her lips were pressed against his. Inuyasha responded subconsciously, applying gentle pressure as his eyes slid shut. Higher thought switched off, he acted solely on emotion, the desires of his heart. The lip lock remained chaste, but as a first real kiss, it was everything that either of them could have hoped for. When Kagome pulled away, Inuyasha followed her briefly out of reflex, reluctant to relinquish the contact. When he opened his eyes again, he found her gazing at him with an indescribable expression, adoration warring with nervousness in her dark pools. It was the latter which caused his higher brain function to restart, and as the possible implications of what had just occurred sank in, he too withdrew to put some distance between them.

"I’m sorry," she whispered. "I shouldn’t have done that."

"S’okay," was all he could manage in response. He knew that she was worried that he would be upset about the kiss, which she had initiated. In reality, however, nothing could be further from the truth. He forced himself to look away from her, because removing his eyes from her face, her lips, was a real challenge. A delightful warmth surged through his veins, his chest throbbing with longing. Part of him desperately wanted to kiss her again, regardless of where that could potentially lead them. And that scared him. His logical mind told him that it was a bad idea, but his heart didn’t care. Fortunately, he was now thinking clearly. Giving in to passions had gotten them into this mess in the first place, and he was not about to exacerbate the situation by repeating past mistakes.

He sensed Kagome shifting to move further away from him and tightened his hold automatically. Her eyes were downcast, her lips turned in a dejected frown. She was probably getting the wrong idea about his reaction to the kiss, and he couldn’t have that. Not now.

"Kagome," he called softly, allowing the easy smile which came naturally simply from being with her to show on his features. She blinked once, seemingly surprised to see such an expression, but soon the melancholy had vanished from her visage and she was cautiously returning his grin.

"So you’ll stay?" he asked, knowing the answer but needing to hear her speak it aloud before his fears would completely subside.

She nodded happily. "For as long as I can." When he quirked an eyebrow at her in confusion, she elaborated. "You heard what Sango-chan said. Eventually I’ll get too big and unwieldy to travel with you guys. You’ll have to leave me behind."

Inuyasha nodded in relief. "That’s fine. As long as I can come back to you."

Kagome pondered that statement. On one level, she was ecstatic about everything he had revealed to her this evening. But there was just enough ambiguity in his words to make her wonder what they really meant. And since this affected not only her future, but that of their unborn child, she had to know.

"Inuyasha, when you asked me to stay…how long did you mean for?"

Inuyasha instantly realized what she was really asking. _How long do I intend to stay with her?_ That was a question he had never held a real answer to, even before Kagome became pregnant. In the past, he would have deferred to Kikyou’s judgment in the matter. If after Naraku was defeated, she demanded that he fulfill his promise and go to hell with her, he would have done so. Kagome could return safely to her world, and none of their other friends would truly need him anymore. But now, everything had changed. Even if all of that came to pass, there would still be one person who _did_ need him. Namely, the innocent child which even Kikyou herself, in all of her hate-fueled rage, had spared. The child had not asked to be born. It had not purposely caused a rift between him and Kikyou. And it could not be punished for it. If he went to hell with Kikyou, that was exactly what he would be doing. This was to say nothing of the intense revulsion which gripped him when he thought of abandoning his flesh and blood for any reason. For once, his decision was both abundantly clear and easy to give voice to.

"I grew up without a father, Kagome. I know what it’s like. And it’s not going to happen. Our child will grow up knowing its father. I promise you that."

When she did not react with immediate delight, he knew what her next question would be. He was not disappointed.

"But what about Kikyou?"

He grimaced. This answer, while no more difficult to arrive at, did fill him with guilt. But he could no longer place Kikyou above all others on his list of priorities. He was going to be a father, and therefore had to place the needs of his child above all else. That was what good parents did. He didn’t know a thing about parenting, but he was damn sure going to be a good—no, _great_ father. He could not rescind his promise to Kikyou, but he could assign it a proper position of importance in his life.

"Kikyou…will have to wait. If she hasn’t found peace and released me by the time our child is an adult, then I’ll go with her. But not before."

This response put an understandable damper on Kagome’s mood. _Oh, Inuyasha…_ He still thought that he owed Kikyou his life. Why couldn’t he see that he owed her nothing? That he had already given her everything she deserved? His life did not belong to her; she had given that up when she betrayed him fifty years ago, when she so readily fell for Naraku’s ruse due to mistrust and selfishness. The bitter, hateful Kikyou which had been so cruel to her this evening…how much did she even resemble the woman Inuyasha had fallen for all those years ago?

Despite her reservations, there was a silver lining. Inuyasha was promising to stay until their child was an adult. In this time period, that was what, another fifteen years? Fifteen years for her to convince him that he did not owe Kikyou his life. Fifteen years for Kikyou to find it within herself to forgive him. Fifteen more years with Inuyasha…the thought brought a brilliant smile to her face. It was not the lifelong promise she desired, but it was incredibly heartening nonetheless. She could picture them now, living together and raising a son or daughter, laughing, crying, and yelling as all parents did. Finding their way through the complicated maze of parenthood and watching their child grow into a fine young man or woman. Even with the prospect of Inuyasha’s departure from this world hanging over their heads, they would be happy. Kagome had come to terms with the reality of raising their child by herself, but having Inuyasha in their lives seemed like a fantasy come true.

There were, of course, unanswered questions. Primarily, what would this arrangement mean for their relationship? Would they be a couple, enjoying everything that status entailed, or merely two friends raising a child together? She would sincerely hope for the former, but even if they never evolved beyond friends, she would cherish their time together. As she had been doing ever since they first met.

Finally, the joy which had been bubbling deep within her burst forth. She yanked her arms out of the sleeping back, kissed Inuyasha on the cheek, and enfolded him in a warm embrace. The hanyou reciprocated immediately, and soon jubilant laughter was escaping from Kagome’s throat. Inuyasha could not have stopped his contented grin even if he had wanted to. This moment, this promised future, was yet another reason why he was the luckiest hanyou who ever lived. All because of this amazing girl in his arms, this exceptional soul who somehow wanted to raise their quarter-youkai child with him. Fifteen more years with Kagome…the prospect seemed surreal. But thanks to the child in her womb, this was his future. He had never been so happy. And if Kikyou forgave him, if she found peace without claiming his life, then he saw no reason why he would ever leave Kagome’s side.

Unbeknownst to either, both Inuyasha and Kagome shared the same thought. For the first time, they considered that perhaps their ill-advised night of passion was meant to happen. Perhaps this child was destined to be conceived, to bring together two individuals who were close but inexorably separated by circumstances. More than ever, the conception seemed a blessing in disguise. And they knew that, no matter what befell them, they would always treat their child as such. They would love it with all of their hearts, without question.

After a time, Inuyasha pulled away from the embrace, still grinning. "Now put your arms back in the sleeping bag before you get sick. You’re still human, wench."

"Yes, yes," Kagome agreed sarcastically, obeying nevertheless. She was still quite cold, now that he reminded her. She snuggled close and rested her head against his chest, enjoying the feel of his body heat seeping through the fabric.

"Just don’t start yelling at me for not covering myself before," she told him sleepily, stifling a yawn. "I know it was stupid."

"Keh. That—that was my fault," Inuyasha replied guiltily. Kagome sensed the shift in his mood, and waited for him to continue.

"Kagome, I—what Kikyou said before…"

"It’s okay," she interrupted, not wanting to dredge up old pain, not when she was still on such an incredible emotional high.

"No, it’s not!" he growled, softening his tone immediately thereafter. "Some of what she was saying…I don’t know how she came up with that bullshit. Like you getting knocked up on purpose, just to make me stay? I know you’d never do something like that."

"How do you know?" Kagome asked. She was completely innocent of that allegation, to be sure, but how would Inuyasha know that? To be honest, his total lack of suspicion regarding any of the accusations Kikyou had made was somewhat surprising.

"I trust you," he responded instantly. Kagome gasped, gazing up at him with wide eyes. The way he said it, without any hesitation or doubt. The way his eyes shone with absolute faith. She felt honored. Her hand once more emerged from the sleeping bag, trailing up his chest to tenderly cup his cheek. He leaned into the touch, never breaking eye contact.

"I would never do anything to hurt you, Inuyasha."

"I know that," he replied, tone overflowing with gratitude. "And I—I’m sorry I let Kikyou hurt you. What she said was unforgivable. I won’t ask you to forgive her."

Kagome gave him a smile to let him know she wasn’t upset, but otherwise made no response as she settled down in his embrace once more. And as she drifted off to sleep minutes later, lulled by the soothing beat of his heart, she made her decision. _It’s okay, Inuyasha. You won’t ask me to forgive Kikyou, but I will anyway. Because you need me to._

The two of them stayed that way long into the early hours of the morning. Inuyasha remained awake, alternately contemplating the life ahead of him and watching Kagome sleep. Sometimes he would catch her smiling in slumber, the serenity of her expression warming his heart. She gave not a single sign of a nightmare. At some point, he heard something shuffling around camp. He had not sensed any unknown entities approaching, so he took a guess.

"Oi, runt!" he called, as softly as he could so that youkai ears would still hear it. "That you?"

"Inuyasha?" came the tentative response. The hanyou sighed in relief, glad that he would not have to leave his perch after all.

"We’re up here, Shippou. If you can make it, you can join us."

Afterward, as Shippou made his noisy—at least to hanyou ears—way up the tree, Inuyasha pondered what had possessed him to extend such an invitation. It was likely just his good mood. But also, Kagome was very important to Shippou. Did he see her as a surrogate mother? Probably not, but maybe as an older sister or some other sort of guardian. What was undeniable was that he felt closer to her than anyone else, as evidenced by the fact that he went to her with every little problem and shared her sleeping roll each night she was in this time. And now that his conversation with Kagome was long over, he saw no reason to deny Shippou the privilege he had grown accustomed to.

Eventually, the kit finished his clambering and plopped down tiredly on the branch directly in front of Inuyasha. The hanyou felt his cheeks pink slightly at the appraising look in those perceptive green eyes. Shippou glanced down to Kagome, then back up to him, and Inuyasha nodded curtly. In moments, the fox was snuggled inside Kagome’s bag, his head resting next to hers. Inuyasha would have been satisfied with that exchange, but of course it couldn’t be quite that easy.

"So you made up with Kagome?" Shippou asked. All he got in response was a noncommittal grunt. "Is that a yes?" Another grunt. "Inuyasha! Did you apologize to Kagome or not?"

"Keh. Would she be up here if I didn’t, baka?"

"If you kidnapped her and she didn’t want to fall, then yes, she would. Baka."

Inuyasha growled. "I didn’t _kidnap_ her, runt. And yes, I did apologize. Happy?"

"So she’s not going home?" the kit demanded, tone colored with worry.

"Not permanently," Inuyasha told him, realizing for the first time just how much anxiety Shippou had suffered through. Cracking a smirk, he added, "She’s staying with us, Shippou."

The kit sighed in relief. "Good."

Within a few minutes, Shippou had joined Kagome in dreamland, leaving Inuyasha once more alone with his thoughts. He passed the remainder of the night in silent reflection, until the first rays of sunlight began peeking over the eastern horizon. Then, reluctantly, he carefully made his way down the tree and returned Kagome and Shippou to their usual resting place around the fire. He allowed himself a lingering look at her peaceful face, and gently brushed aside an unruly lock of her hair. If anyone had been awake to observe him, they would have glimpsed an expression of profound longing play across his features as he forced himself to part from her. Then he found himself a much lower perch in the tree, to continue his watch.

When Miroku and Sango woke an hour or two later, they found Inuyasha rebuilding the fire in preparation for cooking the morning meal, an unfortunate squirrel which had blundered too close to camp. It was not much, but it would be enough to tide all of them over until later. Far from being appreciative, however, the two humans were understandably upset with the hanyou. Even Miroku, normally more supportive than Sango since Inuyasha was a fellow male, refused to speak to him. Inuyasha pretended not to notice the oppressive silence or dirty looks, but anyone who really knew him could see that they were bothering him. Finally, Shippou decided to say something.

"You know, you guys probably shouldn’t be looking at Inuyasha like that. I think you should wait until Kagome wakes up."

"Why, Shippou?" Sango asked, genuinely surprised to find the kit standing up for Inuyasha. "Did he talk to Kagome-chan?"

"How ‘bout all of you mind your own damn business," the hanyou interjected gruffly, but somehow his words lacked their usual bite. Miroku and Sango shared a look, but they silently agreed to stop giving Inuyasha the cold shoulder.

Until Kagome woke up, at least.


	8. Facing the Family

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I wasn’t surprised to get a few reviews expressing frustration with Kagome for being so happy about Inuyasha’s promise to stay with her until their child is grown up. I completely understand that point of view; this is definitely unfair to Kagome, though she doesn’t see it that way. But I do think she’s in-character here because she’s so naturally selfless. I will say that this type of arrangement is a very weak foundation for a relationship. If you’ve read my work, then you know this won’t last. And that’s all I can say without giving something away. 
> 
> On another note, I remembered that in canon, right after Naraku’s defeat by Red Tetsusaiga is when Kagome goes home and we have all the shenanigans with Inuyasha bursting into her room naked and sleeping on her bed. This story diverges from canon before that point, so none of that happens. Instead, the group continues hunting Naraku immediately after his disappearance. Chapter 1 takes place no more than a few days after the battle. So Kagome has not been home in at least a month and a half by the start of this chapter.

Inuyasha yawned again, baring his fangs and blinking the fatigue from his eyes. Not for the first time, Kagome wondered how much sleep he had gotten last night. From her place by his side, close but not enough to infringe upon either of their personal spaces, she had observed his occasional yawning all morning. She, on the other hand, had slept like a baby and had not risen until several hours after dawn. Even her morning sickness had apparently decided to take a day off. All in all, she felt spectacular. The sun was shining brightly without a cloud in the sky as they made their way back to Kaede’s village, balanced perfectly by the cooling breeze which tickled her skin and prevented it from becoming too hot. It was truly an amazing day.

At least, for one of them. After his yawn, Inuyasha returned to the pastime in which he had been engaged all morning—brooding in silence. That somber look in his eyes meant that he could only be contemplating one thing. This observation did not bother Kagome as much as it normally would; it was natural for him to think of Kikyou after what had occurred yesterday. Inuyasha had made it pretty clear that he was ashamed of Kikyou’s actions. That did not mean, however, that he could forget her. Kagome understood that. She did hope that perhaps Kikyou’s behavior would cause him to take her down from the lofty pedestal he had placed her upon. Last night, Kikyou had proven something that Kagome had known all along, but Inuyasha had been resistant to: she was only human. Like anyone else, she could fall victim to her own emotions when they ran away with her. In part because of that inherent imperfection shared by all humans, Kagome had resolved to try to forgive Kikyou. She could not blame her for being upset, after all; she could only imagine how she would feel if their situations were reversed. But the emotion and its physical manifestations were two entirely different things. Even if she caught Inuyasha and Kikyou making love, Kami forbid, Kagome knew that she would never demean his hanyou heritage or insult Kikyou. She would cry, go home, and cry some more. But she would keep her pain to herself, rather than transforming it into a weapon to hurt others. And she would never try to cause a schism between Inuyasha and Kikyou, as long as he was happy and truly wanted to be with her.

That was a crucial element, of course. And after last night, Kagome had a much better idea of how she fit into Inuyasha’s happiness. He had promised to stay with her long enough to raise their child to adulthood, a thought which still filled her with an insane amount of giddiness. What was more, he had not made that decision because he felt obligated to. Well, not solely for that reason. It was true that caring for a child he had sired was an obligation, a burden even. But as Inuyasha had made clear to her last night, just because something was a burden did not mean that he was loath to do it. Some of his burdens made him happy. _I need you. You, Kagome. You most of all._ And then he had begged her to stay, more desperate than she had ever seen him. His heart and soul had been completely bared to her in those moments. She would never forget the tightness of his arms around her, the way his eyes burned with fear and yearning. For Kagome, to finally know how much she meant to him was pure ecstasy. And when she kissed him, she swore she felt something pass between them, something transcending their physical bodies and even their chaotic emotions. She had felt so incredibly close to him, in every sense.

That all-encompassing sense of intimacy had worn off over the minutes and hours which followed, to a degree. His vow to stay with her had sounded vaguely like a proposal, but she knew that to identify it as such would be a mistake. Marriage meant for life, which was not a promise he could make right now even if he wanted to. He hadn’t even told her that he loved her, though she did not think that she had imagined the unspoken love he had conveyed to her last night. But unspoken love was just that: unspoken. And therefore, vulnerable to misinterpretation. But she had fifteen years to explore his feelings for her, which were perhaps growing stronger by the day. As hers were for him.

So despite the reservations and uncertainty, Kagome was still pretty much floating on cloud nine, as Miroku and Sango had discovered when she woke up. The two of them were probably still in shock back there, since Inuyasha usually did not make up with her so quickly or without plenty of prodding. But given how close they had come to never seeing each other again, the hanyou’s unusual behavior made perfect sense. If he had not approached her last night, and had instead allowed her wounds to fester…would she have even listened to him when and if he did finally talk to her? She shuddered at the likely answer, and was again grateful that Inuyasha had comprehended the gravity of the situation.

Ultimately, the only one who had not been surprised to learn of her jubilant mood was Shippou. She had been delighted to learn that Inuyasha had invited the kit up to sleep with them, and even more so at the stunning revelation that the hanyou had kept her in the tree for most of the night. It was as if he had been afraid to let her go. Even after she woke that morning, he had always been nearby. She wouldn’t term it ‘hovering,’ but it had been close, to the point that she had to check over her shoulder to make sure he wasn’t following her when she went to relieve her bladder. All things considered, she didn’t mind any of this. She did hope that he would continue to remain physically closer to her in the future, not because he was insecure about her leaving, but because he felt comfortable doing so. And because he wanted to. She would certainly relish any amount of closeness, even it if was only a gentle touch on the shoulder to get her attention instead of an ‘Oi, wench.’ She had no illusions about shared sleeping arrangements going forward; it simply wasn’t going to happen. Even if they were alone, she sensed that Inuyasha’s customary shyness was firmly back in place now. She would have to hope that her night of deep and satisfying sleep was not solely the result of being in his embrace. Insomnia would not be good for her or the baby. But she was probably worrying too much; the peace of knowing how strongly Inuyasha felt about her would be soothing enough.

There was something else which was not good for the baby, she reflected shamefully. Something that she in her grief had longed for last night. If there had been a jug of sake in her bag, she would have drunk it without hesitation, regardless of the potential harm it could do to the fetus inside her. She would need to remember this in the future. There were no guarantees here. If Inuyasha broke her heart again, whether by his will or by falling at an enemy’s hand, she would need to show more restraint. The needs of their child had to come first, and if that meant she couldn’t numb her pain with drink, then so be it. It was a bit of a wake-up call for Kagome, since a few days ago she had been mentally complaining how immature Inuyasha was. It was clear she had a bit of growing up to do herself before becoming a mother.

But there was plenty of time for that, for both of them. About eight months, to be exact. She was approximately three and a half weeks along by now, and so far the morning sickness was the only symptom of pregnancy she had noticed. Her tummy was as flat as ever, she was pleased to note. She might even have lost a pound or two, but that was probably nothing to worry about at this stage. She would need to make sure she got enough food and ate healthy. That could be a challenge in the feudal era, especially on the road, but fortunately she had a superhuman partner whom she could count on to carry extra food for her without complaint. Or maybe with a _little_ complaint.

She suddenly felt a burning tingle in her nose, and sneezed six times in rapid succession. When she could open her eyes again, she found Inuyasha gazing at her with a mixture of worry and annoyance. She smiled and shook her head, silently brushing off his concerns. She had probably just gotten pollen or something in her nostrils.

By that evening, she was singing, or rather sneezing, a different tune. Her head ached, her sinuses felt clogged, and chills had driven her to change into her warmest set of pajamas while they were still on the road. Inuyasha insisted on carrying her after that, which she didn’t mind. He also insisted on taking her home, but this she protested. They were still four days or more walking distance from Kaede’s village, and Kirara could not carry two humans that far without rest. That meant leaving Miroku and Sango by themselves, which Kagome was reluctant to do, especially after the recent attack by that animated corpse. The monk and slayer were strong, but Kagome still worried for them. Eventually she got Inuyasha to relent and agree not to run her to the well unless her condition worsened.

Fortunately, it turned out to be nothing more than a minor head cold. After a couple days of runny nose and coughing, whatever germ had caused the sickness worked its way out of her system. But of course there is no rest for the weary. Her morning sickness, which had subsided while she was battling her cold, returned with a vengeance once she was well again. For the first time, Kagome found herself vomiting in the afternoon or evening rather than just the morning. She ended up eating most of what remained of Inuyasha’s stash of ramen, since on some days that was just about the only thing she could keep down. To the hanyou’s credit, he neither ate any ramen himself nor complained about the loss of his favorite snack. Kagome determined to let him eat as much has he wanted while they were in her time, and to bring extra along with her on their next trip.

She had never been so happy to see Kaede’s village. It had only taken them about a week to make it back, since instead of zig-zagging around searching for leads, they could walk in a more or less straight line. A fact for which Kagome was exceedingly grateful. Tired, consistently nauseous, and generally sick of travelling for the time being, all she wanted was a hot bath and a long sleep on her cozy bed at home. But they had been gone for a while, and it would be rude to not check in with Kaede before leaving. They found the old miko in her hut, sorting herbs while cooking a stew for the evening meal. It took only one look at them for Kaede’s brow to furrow.

"Kagome, child, you seem pale. Are you ill?"

Kagome laughed uneasily. "In a manner of speaking."

And so began an extremely awkward and embarrassing conversation for the two original members of the Inu-gang. Kagome had not initially intended to tell Kaede everything, but once she started there was no reason to stop. She would view it as a nice dress rehearsal for tonight, because her mother would surely demand details. Besides, the old miko’s advice had never led them astray, and she was sure Kaede would have some helpful or encouraging words of wisdom. For some time, the old miko simply listened in silence.

"Does my sister know of this?" she asked quietly during a pause. At Kagome’s affirmative nod, she sighed. "I see. That is unfortunate. I am certain that Kikyou-onee-sama did not take the news well. My apologies, Kagome."

"It’s okay, Kaede-baa-chan. Inuyasha…helped me understand."

Kaede looked between the pair, from the mildly blushing schoolgirl to the hanyou glaring at the floorboards with a guilt-ridden expression. Both she took as positive signs. She did not know exactly what had transpired between the two of them, and she did not feel it was her place to pry, but evidently they had come to some sort of understanding regarding the future. This was wonderful to see; maintaining harmony between them would be crucial in the difficult times ahead.

"I am glad to hear it," she said, favoring Inuyasha with an approving smile. The hanyou snapped a ‘keh’ and crossed his arms over his chest, but his spirits did seem to raise somewhat. Then she turned back to Kagome.

"The two of you will need to cooperate more than ever now. Should you require anything of me, you need only ask. I have guided many women through this phase of motherhood. I cannot imagine that carrying a quarter-youkai child will be much different from carrying a human one, but there may be unforeseen variations. You will need to significantly alter your diet, Kagome. If you wish, I can prepare a ginger tea which will help to settle your stomach. Though there may be medicines in your time which are more effective."

"Thank you, Kaede-baa-chan," Kagome breathed, sincerely grateful. She had been mildly concerned that Kaede would be angry or even shun them, given her status as a miko and her relationship to Kikyou. But any miko who would welcome a hanyou into her hut was progressive by the standards of the time, and Kaede had always been of the opinion that her sister should return to peaceful rest in the afterlife, without dragging Inuyasha down with her. Kagome did appreciate the offer of assistance, and was sure that she would make use of Kaede’s knowledge in the future, but for now she felt obligated to give her mother the first crack at taking care of her.

"A wise choice," Kaede declared when Kagome told her, nodding in understanding. "Your mother has the benefit of experience. She has borne children before, whereas I have not. I hope that between the two of us we can guide you through a healthy pregnancy, on both sides of the bone eater’s well."

"Thank you, Kaede-baa-chan." "Thanks, babaa."

Inuyasha and Kagome looked at each other, having spoken at the same time. But while one expression of gratitude was certainly more polite than the other, both were equally sincere. Kaede gazed at Inuyasha contemplatively.

"Inuyasha, how much do you know about pregnancy?"

"Keh. Why the hell would I know anything about that, babaa?" he retorted defensively.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome snapped. "Don’t be rude. She’s offering to help you. Though to be honest, Kaede-baa-chan, I really don’t know that much about it myself. I’m sure my mother will give me more information than I’ll ever need."

"That is good," Kaede told her. "One can never know too much. And indeed, I was offering to help. Inuyasha, I am going to tell you the same thing I tell all of the husbands who come to see me. This is your pregnancy as well. You must educate yourself so you understand what your wi—Kagome is going through, and so you can help her as much as possible. If you would like to expand your knowledge on the subject, you know where to find me."

Inuyasha considered that for a moment. It was true that he needed to learn about pregnancy, if only to keep Kagome comfortable and safe. Would getting lessons from Kaede be awkward as hell? Definitely. But given the lack of available alternatives, it might be his best option. And he certainly appreciated the offer; Kaede’s generosity had already gone far above and beyond his expectations.

"I’ll think about it, bab—Kaede. Thanks."

Kaede sighed and shook her head, but she supposed that being called by her name, with nothing rude tacked on, was an improvement of sorts.

"You are welcome, Inuyasha. I sense that you will make a good partner and father if you put your mind to it. But make no mistake, both of you. Your lives have been changed forever. Sometimes these things are destined by the Kami, and other times they are merely products of chance. Only time will tell, and what you choose to make of it."

Both Inuyasha and Kagome nodded at the wisdom in those words. Fate or luck had dealt them a hand, and they needed to embrace it and move forward. Looking back and wondering what might have been would only lead them astray. But this advice did remind Kagome of one thing she definitely regretted. And in this case, there was likely no person alive more qualified to answer her question than Kaede.

"Kaede-baa-chan, I…I can’t use my power anymore. I’m no longer a miko."

"Being a miko means more than wielding power, child," was Kaede’s immediate response, but afterwards she fingered her chin and closed her eyes, pondering silently. After a moment, Miroku spoke up.

"I found it surprising that Kagome-sama lost her spiritual power, Kaede-sama. Despite what happened."

"You do not need to explain your reasoning to me, Houshi-dono," Kaede told him. "I understand well. But spiritual power is a fickle thing. It is sensitive to many changes a person may undergo, even those which seem insignificant. It is possible that Kagome’s power has not vanished, but is merely dormant. Allow me to think on this. We will talk again when you return from your time."

After a brief exchange of goodbyes, Inuyasha and Kagome departed for the modern era. Both were feeling understandably anxious. Staring down into the darkness at the bottom of the well, Kagome took a deep breath to steady her nerves. If she was already getting the jitters, what would she do when facing her mother? Inuyasha stood silently beside her, but she could sense his apprehension in the rigidity of his back, and the frown on his face. She reached for his hand and found it easily, as if he’d had the same idea and was only waiting for her to make the first move. A gentle squeeze from him did much to slow the pounding of her heart, and she managed a hesitant smile.

"Are you ready for this?" she asked.

"Nope," he replied honestly.

"Inuyasha!" she groaned. "You’re supposed to be trying to comfort me!"

He scoffed at her. " _You’re_ the one who should be comforting _me_. If your mom comes at me with a knife, I’m outta there."

"Oh, don’t be so dramatic. Mama wouldn’t attack you with a knife…maybe a frying pan or a broomstick," she teased. "But then your head is hard enough to take it."

"Keh. Wench."

Kagome giggled at his typical gruff response, but was glad to see a hint of a grin on his lips. The humorous moment had done wonders to lighten her mood. Now she felt ready to face her family.

"Come on, let’s go," she declared, stepping up onto the side of the well and jumping in. Inuyasha followed her as expected—to a point.

"Inuyasha!" she called, half yelling and half laughing. She gazed up at him from inside the well, suspended only by her outstretched right arm, which he held effortlessly while straddling the opening of the structure above her. The look on his face was priceless, and would perfectly fit the caption ‘do I really want to go through with this?’

"You know, Kagome," he said, his tone and expression so peculiar that she couldn’t tell whether he was joking or being completely serious. "We don’t have to do this. We could come back in eight months and say ‘here’s your grandchild.’"

Now Kagome did laugh. "We’re not doing that! Now, come on. Don’t tell me the _mighty_ Inuyasha is afraid of a little middle-aged Japanese lady," she scolded lightheartedly.

Inuyasha scowled, and then suddenly Kagome was falling, shrieking in surprise as she plummeted into the time slip. She was ready and waiting when Inuyasha emerged into the modern era a second after she did.

"Baka!" she shouted, playfully slapping him on the shoulder. "You could have warned me before you dropped me!"

He smirked as if to say ‘where would the fun be in that?’ Then abruptly his smile faded away, his expression hardening with grim determination.

"Inuyasha? What’s wrong?"

She gasped as his hand came to rest on her shoulder, holding her close, enough so that their breath mingled in the scant space between them. And then she was paralyzed, both by the feel of him so near and the solemn look in his eyes, twin amber orbs shining like beacons in the darkness.

"Seriously, Kagome," he stated at last. "If your mother loses it, I’m grabbing you and taking you back. I’m going to protect you and the baby, above all else."

Kagome heard what he didn’t say—he was not going to allow _that_ to happen again. That being her treatment by Kikyou. If her mother could not keep her cool, she had no doubt that Inuyasha would follow through on his threat. Too much stress was not good for the baby, but more than that, she saw a silent vow reflected back at her as she gazed up at him. This was not a one-time promise. He would never let anyone abuse her like that again, no matter who her attacker was.

Kagome’s breathing faltered. Though she was truly touched, the reminder of Kikyou’s cruel words still brought her to the brink of tears. Inuyasha accepted her into his embrace, holding her as a few rogue droplets flowed down her cheeks and were absorbed by the fabric of his haori. But though Kagome relaxed and recovered her composure very quickly, Inuyasha’s body remained tensed.

"Are you…" he mumbled, his voice barely above a whisper. "Are you sure you still want me to stay?"

Again, Kagome heard the words he failed to utter. _Are you sure you want to be with me, a hanyou who can’t even keep you from getting hurt? Do you really want me to be the father of your child?_ Kagome pulled back to look at him, taking in his downcast expression and ears drooped with shame. Evidently, he had yet to forgive himself for what had happened with Kikyou, though she had forgiven him days ago. He could no more control Kikyou than she could. And she truly believed him when he said that he would never allow anything like that to happen again. The next time they met Kikyou, if the dead miko’s attitude had not changed, she had no doubt that Inuyasha would do something.

"Inuyasha, look at me." He did so, hesitantly, and Kagome smiled sadly at the hint of moisture in his eyes. _He is so hard on himself. If I told him I didn’t want him, he would leave, even if it killed him._ He didn’t realize how much this would hurt her, as well.

"Inuyasha, I have never been more sure of anything in my life. The other night you said you needed me," she reminded him, beaming at the sudden tinge of pink to his cheeks. "Well…I need you too. I can’t do this without you."

"You could," he retorted, once again breaking eye contact. Despite his response, however, Kagome could see that she had gotten through to him. So she waited patiently for him to finish speaking, sensing that there was something else on his mind.

"Dammit, Kagome," he growled in frustration. "You don’t need _me_ to raise a kid. You’ll be a natural mother. Me, I don’t have any fucking idea how to be a father."

He had been thinking about this a lot lately. On the night he had promised to stay with Kagome, he had also vowed to be a good father to their child. But that was easy to say, and exponentially more difficult to actually achieve. Every time he thought about the ‘how’ factor, his mind went blank. The fleeting sense of confidence he had felt that evening had vanished without a trace and never returned. The closest he’d had to a father growing up had been his human grandfather, who hadn’t said five words to him the whole time he’d lived at the village with his mother. And then as soon as his mother died, he’d been chased out of the village with weapons and torches to fend for himself in the wilderness. How could anyone with that sort of background turn out to be anything other than an absolutely _terrible_ father?

Kagome shook her head and favored him with a soft smile. "Inuyasha, you’re going to be a wonderful father."

"Tch. Bullshit," he snorted dismissively.

"It’s not," she replied, more firmly this time. Seeing that she had his attention, she lightened her tone once more. "Inuyasha, the most important thing to being a good parent is caring. You would go to the ends of the earth for this baby, and it’s not even born yet. You care, more than you know. The rest of it we can figure out together. Okay?"

He gazed at her, hope and self-loathing warring in his golden orbs until finally the former won out. He nodded once, the left side of his lips quirking up in a relieved grin. Kagome embraced him again, and this time when he hugged her back, all of the tension left him. She breathed deeply of his scent, finally able to simply enjoy the sensation of his muscular body pressed against her own. She felt so serene; she knew she could remain like this all afternoon. But alas, all good things must come to an end. So, with a regretful sigh, she reminded him of the task which still awaited them. She felt him nod, and then after a breathtaking flurry of motion she found herself standing unsteadily on the dirt beside the well. Inuyasha waited until she regained her balance, then released her, though he still remained close by her side. His expression was guarded now, an obvious attempt to conceal his nervousness. Kagome did not bother trying to hide hers; instead, she grabbed his hand and pulled him up the stairs, out onto the shrine grounds, and up to the front door of the house. To his credit, Inuyasha offered no resistance.

Now normally, she would barge in without knocking and announce her presence with a loudly-exclaimed ‘Tadaima!’ Feeling more subdued today, she instead knocked twice. Then, after one final confidence-affirming deep breath, she cautiously opened the door and poked her head in. In the foyer she immediately spied her mother, who had already been on her way to answer the door. The older woman froze in her tracks and blinked in surprise.

"Kagome? You know you don’t have to knock when you come home. Is something wrong?"

Kagome could see the worry in her mother’s eyes; she probably thought that she and Inuyasha had fought again. In a few minutes, she would likely wish it was that simple.

"Hi, Mama," Kagome greeted quietly, pushing open the door so her mother could see Inuyasha as well. "Can we…talk to you?"

Mrs. Higurashi stared a moment at their still-joined hands, then briefly locked eyes with each of them in turn. Her brow furrowed in confusion and concern, but she held her questions. Nodding, she turned and led them into the kitchen. It was a good place to talk, since Souta had not yet returned from school and Kagome’s grandfather was in the shed. Inuyasha had sensed this on the way in, and was glad that he and Kagome had managed to sneak past without the old man noticing them. This was going to be hard enough with one Higurashi family member.

The three of them sat around the table, Inuyasha and Kagome on one side and Mrs. Higurashi facing them from the other. Kagome’s hands fidgeted in her lap, her eyes darting anxiously about the room. She could only stand to make eye contact with her mother for the occasional split-second. Inuyasha had more success in that regard, though it did help that Mrs. Higurashi was not really looking at him. She sat motionless in her chair, back straight, studying her daughter with real apprehension coloring her features. Kagome, on the other hand, could not seem to keep still. While it appeared that Inuyasha was by far the more composed of the two, in reality he was just better at hiding his nerves. He was sure the fact that this was her mother and not his own also had something to do with it. He was considering whether he should take on the burden of spilling the beans himself when Kagome finally took a deep breath and spoke.

"Mama…I’m pregnant."

Mrs. Higurashi’s eyes widened, but overall she did not seem as surprised as Inuyasha might have expected. Evidently, pregnancy was one of the possibilities she had been turning around inside her head for the past few minutes. She also reacted in an unexpected manner. Instead of yelling or immediately demanding details—or attacking him with some sort of household weapon—she merely pushed back from the table and strode over to the counter. Once there, she took a cup from the cupboard and began preparing herself some tea. He did notice the way her hands shook slightly, but other than that she made no outward show of emotion. She gazed out the window, apparently lost in deep contemplation.

Inuyasha took all of this as a good sign. Kagome still squirmed fretfully at his side, probably more unnerved by the silence than anything else, but Inuyasha allowed himself to relax just a bit. Mrs. Higurashi was already taking this better than Kikyou had; she was actually willing to stop and think about it for a minute before throwing a tantrum. But the seconds continued to tick by, until three or four minutes had passed. Finally and with a roll of his eyes, Inuyasha decided to do something about Kagome’s fidgeting. With a bit of hesitation, he placed his arm around her shoulders. She froze, glancing left to where his hand rested, then slowly panned her gaze to the right with a dumbfounded expression. He favored her with what he hoped was a confident smile, suddenly feeling more nervous than he had all day. Kagome blushed and whipped her head back around to stare down at the table, but she did at least stop fidgeting.

Inuyasha returned his gaze to Mrs. Higurashi, who he found leaning back against the counter, her expression unreadable. He wasn’t sure how much of that exchange she had seen, but she made no comment as she reclaimed her seat at the table. She took a moment to savor the first sip of her tea, letting out a soft, blissful sigh with eyes closed. When she opened them again, both Inuyasha and Kagome could tell that her brief period of silent reflection was over.

"So," Mrs. Higurashi began, calmly but firmly. "How did this happen?"

It was a legitimate question, Kagome reflected. By now her mother must have realized that her pregnancy had not resulted from a mutual confession of romantic feelings. If she and Inuyasha had been planning a wedding or something, the mood at this table would be entirely different. She would have confronted her mother with more of a ‘this is how it is’ attitude, rather than the vaguely apologetic one she now wore.

So, slowly and with plenty of stumbling over her words, Kagome related the tale. There was not much to say, fortunately, but she didn’t expect to get away with ‘we got drunk and slept together.’ As she spoke, she surreptitiously emphasized details which could at least provide a small amount of justification for her behavior, as people are wont to do when making a confession. Her mother did not say anything, nor make any sound of disapproval, but her eyes spoke volumes the few times Kagome dared to meet them. Her mother was incredibly disappointed, and the fact that Kagome had expected this did not lessen the sting of shame.

At last she finished, and a brief silence settled over the kitchen until Mrs. Higurashi spoke.

"So what are you going to do now?"

Kagome blinked in surprise. Of all the responses her mother could have started out with, she never would have expected that one. It sounded like she was honestly asking her, one adult to another, rather than a parent asking what a child wants so she can decide whether to approve or not. It was very strange, and more than a little disconcerting.

"Mama?"

"You heard me, Kagome."

"B-but, I…I mean, I thought you would…"

"Yell and forbid you from going back to the past ever again?" At Kagome’s nod, Mrs. Higurashi laughed dryly. "It was certainly my first instinct. Why do you think I made tea? But you appeared to be suitably remorseful about it. Both of you seem to realize how big a deal this is. So yelling would do absolutely no good, would it?" She paused a moment, waiting for Kagome to nod her head in agreement. "And as for forbidding you from going back, that wouldn’t do much good either. If I told you that you could never see Inuyasha or your friends from the other side of the well again, would that stop you from going back?"

Kagome considered this a moment. She had been mentally prepared for her mother to make such a prohibition. Obviously she would have tried to persuade her to reconsider, but if her mother remained unmoved, what would she have done? Would she have relinquished the life she enjoyed in the past, with her friends and the man she loved?

"Probably not," she admitted sheepishly.

"So it was never a matter of me letting you go back," Mrs. Higurashi stated. "You want me to approve of you traveling in a dangerous era while pregnant, with the man who made you that way in the first place. I can’t do it! I just… But then, it doesn’t really matter. If you’re looking for my approval, you won’t get it. But I know I can’t stop you. So I’ll ask again, what are you going to do now?"

Kagome was left cringing from the bitterness in her mother’s tone, but she understood where the older woman was coming from. Her mother really _was_ treating her as an adult, instructing her to make her own choices and deal with the consequences. Kagome found that she was ready for the responsibility; she knew without a doubt what her decision was, but she feared the repercussions. For months she had maintained strong relationships on both sides of the well, and she prayed that this would not change. That part of it at least _was_ up to her mother.

"Mama," she began, somehow mustering the courage to keep her voice level. "I have to go back. My friends…I know from your perspective they died hundreds of years ago, but they’re _real_. They want to settle down and live normal lives too, but they can’t. Not until Naraku is defeated and the Shikon no Tama is purified. I need to help them…in any way that I can. I love them. But I love my family too. You, Jii-chan, Souta…I don’t want to lose any of you either. Please…"

Kagome’s voice cracked at the end, the tears she had been holding back finally pooling in her eyes. She knew what she was asking: _please don’t disown me. Please don’t tell me that I can’t see my family._ It was a truly horrifying thought. But if forced to choose between her two families, old and new, she would choose the latter. Inuyasha, Sango, Miroku, and Shippou needed her in a way that Mama, Jii-chan, and Souta did not. Even if she never got her spiritual power back and was useless in combat, her friends in the past relied heavily on Inuyasha, who she was sure would remain by her side, whichever side of the well she chose. She was also forced to consider which era would provide a better environment to raise their quarter-youkai child. If it had Inuyasha’s ears or any other outwardly inhuman trait, the answer was obviously the feudal era. Prejudice against nonhumans would be infinitely better than the treatment their child would receive in the modern era if he or she could not pass as a normal human. And growing up in Kaede’s village, there probably wouldn’t be much prejudice to speak of at any rate. Most of the people who could remember the brash, violent Inuyasha who had stolen the Shikon no Tama fifty years prior were dead. The current generation more or less accepted him as one of the village’s protectors. It would be no different for his offspring.

All of this logic did not make the thought of being disowned by her natural family any more bearable. If her mother told her to leave, it would be worse than anything Kikyou could ever do or say. Inuyasha would have to carry her, because she would be reduced to an inconsolable mess. She held her breath, waiting for her mother’s response.

Finally, Mrs. Higurashi’s glare softened. She reached for her daughter’s hand and Kagome desperately grasped the offered appendage in both of her own, clinging to it like a lifeline. And in those tired eyes, from beneath all the disappointment and frustration, a mother’s love shone through.

"Kagome, you know you will always be welcome here. And I…understand why you need to go back. I just hope you’ll be _careful._ I don’t want to see you hurt anymore."

Mrs. Higurashi nodded her head just slightly in Inuyasha’s direction, and it became clear to Kagome that her mother was not referring merely to physical pain. She opened her mouth to deliver assurances that Inuyasha wouldn’t hurt her in any way, but an unexpected voice cut her off.

"She will," Inuyasha declared resolutely, drawing the surprised gazes of both women. But after letting Kagome handle things for a while, he knew it was time for him to do his part. He and Kagome were in this together, after all.

"I’ll make sure Kagome’s careful," he continued. "She won’t take part in any battles unless absolutely necessary. Either me or Sango or Miroku will stay by her side at all times."

He paused, and Kagome reflected that none of his words were all that surprising. All of it made perfect sense, and would pretty much go without saying in the feudal era. What really shocked her was what he said next.

"Kagome said we could get really good ‘pre-naytal’ care here. Any time she needs supplies or has to see a doctor, we’ll come back, no questions asked. If she needs me to carry her all day, I’ll do it. I’ll take care of Kagome and the baby. I’ll do what’s best for them, no matter what."

Mrs. Higurashi studied the pair across the table from her, her daughter and this man she loved. Inuyasha, resolutely meeting her gaze without flinching, despite the embarrassed flush to his cheeks. Kagome, regarding him adoringly, a brilliant smile adorning her features. This man—he was the only one she looked at that way. He had always held the tremendous power to make her smile, or cry. She loved him with all her heart. And looking at him now, Mrs. Higurashi thought that perhaps he loved her too. If so, she knew she could not ask for better in a son-in-law. She had always heard that sometimes things happened because they were destined by fate. She didn’t know if that was true, but what she did know was that she wanted her daughter to be happy. And if being with Inuyasha, if raising a child with Inuyasha would make her happy, then she was willing to give their love a chance. She only hoped that Inuyasha would do the same.

But as she considered his words, she did wonder where he stood on that front. Kagome had essentially described a one-night stand between friends. So what were they now? Just friends? Friends with benefits? Friends with a hidden, unspoken romance between them? Mrs. Higurashi quickly decided that she needed more insight on this subject, and the only way to know for sure was to ask.

"What are you to each other now?"

She almost laughed at the way Inuyasha tensed up, breaking eye contact immediately and taking to studying the microscopic imperfections in the nearest wall. Kagome managed to appear only slightly more composed, but she did at least retain the ability to speak.

"Mama, Inuyasha promised to stay with me and help raise our child. We’re going to be parents together."

Mrs. Higurashi knew an evasion when she heard one. But while Kagome had certainly avoided giving a real answer to her question, she had also revealed a great deal about the current state of their relationship. Mrs. Higurashi looked to Inuyasha for confirmation and received a firm nod. And for the first time that afternoon, she felt her lips part in a sincere smile. So the two of them were obviously not a couple yet; it didn’t mean that it wouldn’t happen. Inuyasha had clearly not made that promise simply because he felt obligated to. Kagome seemed deliriously happy with the arrangement at this point, though it was obviously not everything she hoped for. On the other hand, Mrs. Higurashi had the sneaking suspicion that her daughter was not telling her everything. But there would be plenty of time for the two of them to speak privately over the next week or two. Oh, yes, Kagome and Inuyasha were going to stay that long. So they wanted modern prenatal care? That was great, but they were going to take advice from the woman who had been through it twice before. They were going to do it _her_ way. She didn’t think she would have to put her foot down too hard, but it would be a nice test of Inuyasha’s vow to do what was best for Kagome and the baby, ‘no questions asked.’

"I’m glad," she answered honestly. "It’s wonderful that you’re going to raise the child together. Children always benefit when there are two caring parents in the picture…"

"Mama…"

Mrs. Higurashi shook her head, chasing away her brief melancholy and moving on to another question on her mind.

"So…you’ve definitely decided to have the baby, correct?"

"Yes, Mama," Kagome replied meaningfully.

Mrs. Higurashi nodded in acceptance. She didn’t have a problem with Kagome rejecting abortion, as long as she had considered it as an option. She knew many Japanese parents would have actually pushed their daughters into abortion, to avoid ruining the girl’s future or bringing dishonor on her and the family. But then most Japanese parents would not have allowed their daughters to travel back in time in the first place. And most girls did not have the option of seeking a future that was not actually _in_ the future. If Inuyasha came to openly return Kagome’s feelings, there was a good possibility that the two of them would take up residence in the feudal era, and this whole ‘family honor’ concept would be moot. So Mrs. Higurashi knew that even if she wanted Kagome to abort the baby, she could no more force her into it than she could force her to remain on this side of the well. Most daughters didn’t have a powerful hanyou to take care of them if the only alternatives were to listen to the parent or get kicked out onto the street.

Neither woman caught the look of confusion which passed over Inuyasha’s features at this exchange. But he kept his puzzlement to himself, and the moment passed.

Now that the truly serious subjects had been dealt with, what followed was a discussion of some of the finer details of how things would be handled going forward. Kagome announced that she still planned to attend school, which caused a bit of an argument. Inuyasha insisted on going with her, as in _inside_ the building. While his concern was endearing, this level of paranoia was too much. Eventually she negotiated him down to remaining on one of the neighboring rooftops, and described to him the location of her classroom so he could look in through the window. She did make him promise to remain concealed so she wouldn’t see him and be distracted from her studies.

It was at this point that her mother ‘helpfully’ suggested that Inuyasha walk her to and from school, instead of trailing her from the rooftops as Kagome had imagined. Of course Inuyasha agreed, not realizing the significance of the action in this time period. But when Kagome glared at her, Mrs. Higurashi merely smiled innocently. And when she cleverly retorted that Inuyasha drew too much attention in his fire-rat robes, her mother replied that they would simply have to buy him a couple sets of modern clothing. At last, Kagome admitted defeat. This was made easier since she was secretly delighted to be on the losing end of this one.

They discussed several more relatively minor topics, avoiding making plans for too far ahead. They had plenty of time to talk about how to handle the delivery, late-term prenatal care, and the like. For now, no one felt up to a protracted conversation about things which would not take place for months, including Mrs. Higurashi. She had just found out that she was going to be a grandmother, after all, and was probably still in a little bit of shock. That, and she would need some time to truly move beyond her disappointment and frustration to be the loving, understanding mother that Kagome needed her to be.

Eventually the conversation wound down, and Kagome started thinking about the other members of the household who had yet to learn of her pregnancy.

She sighed. "I guess we should go tell Jii-chan and Souta about this. Although…" She looked to her mother, silently pleading.

Mrs. Higurashi favored her with a breathtakingly warm smile. "Kagome, would you like me to inform your grandfather and brother about this?"

Kagome nodded happily, and was just about to express her gratitude when her mother’s expression suddenly shifted.

"Not a chance, dear," she said firmly, still smiling, but more in amusement than warmth this time. "You are very _clearly_ an adult now. You’ll have to tell your grandfather and Souta yourself. Preferably in that order, so your grandfather doesn’t have to hear about it from a…shall we say, second-hand source."

Kagome grinned sheepishly, suddenly understanding the meaning of the phrase ‘tough love.’ But it was love nonetheless, and her mother was right. She was an adult, and that meant doing what needed to be done without complaint. As she led Inuyasha from the kitchen in search of her grandfather, her mother called after them, still sounding fairly amused.

"It is a good time to be glad that the current Higurashi priest’s sutras don’t work, ne Inuyasha?"

"Keh."

In the end, Kagome sincerely wished she’d had the foresight to talk to her grandfather alone. Not because he flung sutras at Inuyasha—he didn’t. In fact, rather than attempting to drive Inuyasha away, her grandfather had done just the opposite. It should have set off alarm bells. She had forgotten that the old man grew up in a time when having a child out of wedlock was far more socially stigmatized than it was today. So the natural solution when presented with a pregnant, unwed female family member was to invite the male responsible into the family. ‘Invite’ being a generous term. In reality, what transpired was a none-too-gentle demand to ‘do right by my granddaughter.’ And since Inuyasha didn’t seem to immediately understand _exactly_ what that meant, her grandfather endeavored to explain, poking him in the chest all the while. Kagome just _barely_ managed to interrupt before the dreaded M-word was uttered—the one her mother had been tactful enough not to mention in Inuyasha’s presence. But tact had never been her grandfather’s strong suit. He was actually similar to Inuyasha in that regard, but good luck convincing either of them that they shared a character trait.

Kagome was mentally exhausted by the time that little discussion was over. Inuyasha hadn’t appreciated her grandfather’s implications, and her grandfather hadn’t appreciated him knocking her up in the first place. Or her shushing him when he tried to tell Inuyasha to marry her. Fortunately, Inuyasha in his anger had actually responded in a way which seemed to somewhat mollify the old man, paraphrasing the promise he’d made to her mother in the kitchen. The two of them had parted on relatively good terms, an uneasy truce in place between them. The peaceful resolution did nothing to alleviate Kagome’s sudden headache or that hint of nausea she could feel brewing in her belly. And to top everything off, as she dragged Inuyasha back toward the house, she saw Souta coming up the shrine steps.

She groaned. "You tell him," she ordered, essentially throwing Inuyasha at her brother. The hanyou turned as if to protest, but took one look at her and apparently thought better of it. A wise move.

She became more than a little annoyed when Inuyasha beat around the bush for the better part of five minutes, making pointless small talk. She was just thinking that perhaps a nice ‘osuwari’ would loosen his tongue when he finally quit stalling. Souta’s positive reaction did much to improve her sour mood. There was something contagious about his youthful exuberance, his excitement at the prospect of being an uncle so young. The fact that he idolized the father was also a huge part of it, Kagome had no doubt. Unfortunately, though the reactions of Jii-chan and Souta had been at opposite ends of the spectrum, they did share one common thread. And this time she wasn’t quick enough to prevent it from being voiced.

"So are you guys getting married or something?"

Was it possible to hear one’s own veins popping in one’s forehead? Kagome felt her face turn several shades of red. If looks could kill, she would be an only child. Souta, sensing her murderous intent, made a beeline for the house and slammed the door behind him. _Damn, damn, damn!_ She had wanted to avoid having her family delve too deeply into her relationship with Inuyasha. She knew where she stood in that regard. Inuyasha had given her all he felt free to give, and that was enough for now. All talking about marriage would do was make him guilty and uncomfortable.

That much was true, she realized as she looked at him. But again he surprised her. Rather than appearing ready to close himself off emotionally, he simply stood and gazed at her with a sad expression.

"Kagome, you can stop trying so hard. I’m not stupid. I know what the jijii and even your mom were talking about. I just…can’t think about that right now."

His eyes begged her to understand, to forgive him for not being able to give her what her family wanted. Kagome felt her heart melt as she made her way over to him. She took his hand and squeezed it lovingly as she smiled up at him.

"I know that, Inuyasha. That’s why I tried to keep them quiet. I didn’t want you to feel bad."

"I appreciate it, but don’t worry about me. I’m tough. I can take it."

And just like that, he was back to being his confident, slightly arrogant self. How much of that was illusory in that moment, Kagome would never know. But she was so ready to move away from this topic of conversation that she didn’t dwell on it.

They went back into the house only to find her mother absent. According to a note left on the kitchen table, she had gone to the store. Kagome wondered what she was buying, but idle curiosity was very far down on her list of priorities right now. Recently moved up to the top was a hot bath. She swore she heard glorious classical music playing as she sank into the steamy water. Then a few minutes later, the imaginary music abruptly stopped and she had to leap out of the tub to be sick. But her stomach seemed to settle soon after, so her excursion to the toilet did not detract too much from her enjoyment of the bath.

Forty-five minutes later, feeling completely refreshed and clad in a clean, comfortable set of flannel pajamas, Kagome made her way downstairs. She found Inuyasha watching a baseball game with Souta, the latter rooting for one team or another and the former simply taking it all in. She snickered under her breath; Inuyasha was probably just glad not to be the center of attention for a change. She entered the kitchen looking for her mother, and found her there, but the first thing she noticed was the large bottle on the counter. They were prenatal vitamins, she learned upon further inspection. And not store brand either. Kagome groaned mentally. _Let the spending begin…_

She was of course grateful for her mother’s thoughtfulness. Even more so when she was informed that her first prenatal appointment had already been scheduled, though not so much when she learned of the actual date.

"Next Friday?! But Mama, that’s over a week away!"

"Is that a problem?" Mrs. Higurashi demanded with a frown.

Kagome grimaced. _She_ didn’t mind the long stay, but it wasn’t her opinion which concerned her. As it turned out, she needn’t have worried about her partner either.

"It’s fine!" Inuyasha called crankily from the other room. "Do what your mom says, wench."

Kagome blinked in surprise. "You’ll really let me stay here for more than a week?"

"Keh! I already said it, didn’t I?"

Kagome quickly decided not to press Inuyasha any further. He was definitely committed to honoring his word, but that didn’t mean he was happy about the delay. Pleased or no, however, his answer did satisfy her mother, who Kagome hugged and thanked for the help she had already provided, not two hours after learning of her pregnancy. Then she pushed the older woman out of the kitchen, promising to make dinner for the family. Her mother could use a break, and giving her an opportunity to spend time with Inuyasha was also a positive outcome. And if the meal Kagome prepared was not quite up to the usual standards of the household, no one dared to complain.

After such an eventful day, Kagome expected sleep to come easily. Yet later that night, she found herself lying on her back, staring up at the ceiling. The problem was not the mattress, which was as comfortable as ever. Nor was she feeling ill. No, there was just something bugging her, something about Inuyasha’s words earlier…

She sat straight up in bed with a gasp. Her gaze panned over to him, finding his eyes glowing back at her from his place under the window, silently asking if she was okay. She managed a shaky nod and settled down again, raising the covers up to her nose in an attempt to conceal her blush. Still she sensed him watching her, which raised delightful goose bumps on her arms. Her mind raced now, repeatedly running over his words.

"I know what the jijii and even your mom were talking about. I just…can’t think about that right now."

The last part of that statement was what quickened her heartbeat, the end of the phrase which seemed to leave tantalizing possibilities hanging in the air. He could not consider marriage _right now_ , but perhaps later? For instance, if Kikyou forgave him and found peace? And Kagome didn’t think he was talking about marriage for the sake of duty, either. She had initiated a kiss in the tree after Kikyou’s appearance, and they’d also had a near miss before that. In her more optimistic moments, she thought that at least part of him wanted to be romantically involved with her, but there was something holding him back. It didn’t take a genius to figure out what that was.

Of course, there was still the disappointing possibility, even probability, that she was reading too much into his words, inventing meaning and significance where there really was none. Still, she could not stop her mind from turning, from imagining what could be. She and Inuyasha, wed and basking in each other’s love, raising a child together.

With a sigh, Kagome rolled over and drifted off to sweet dreams.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Am I crazy? For some reason, I picture Jii-chan sitting on his porch, wearing blue overalls with a gun on his lap and a stalk of hay in between his teeth, waiting for Inuyasha to show up. That would be the American version of a “shotgun wedding.” I’m sure the Japanese have their own version, LOL. 
> 
> And thanks again to SplendentGoddess for answering my question about the various honorifics people use for Kaede. I believe it’s done correctly now. I like to use some Japanese in my fanfics, but not incorrect Japanese.


	9. A Much-Needed Break

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Thanks to knittingknots for alerting me to an Americanism I was using. It seems that the Japanese have a much harsher attitude toward teen pregnancy than we do here in the States. Some changes were made to this chapter before posting, and I made a small alteration to chapter 8 as well. If you saw Mrs. Higurashi’s brief reflection on abortion in the large paragraph right after she asks if Kagome is going to have the baby, then you read the updated version.

Kagome took a deep breath, willing herself to relax. This was a standard thing many pregnant women went through. Of course, most pregnant women weren’t unwed teenagers. But Mama had set this up, and her mother’s judgment had certainly never led her astray before. Still, she couldn’t shake the jitters. The two of them had just boarded the subway en route to the doctor’s office. It was about a twenty minute ride, and in that time Kagome hoped to get her heartbeat to slow down. Fortunately, it early afternoon, so the train was not crowded. No one else was sitting or standing within a few meters of them.

Her mother patted her leg comfortingly. "Relax, dear. This is all normal."

Kagome managed a tense smile. "I know, Mama. It’s just…" She stopped, just before saying something foolish. _I wish Inuyasha was here._

That he was not was of her own doing, of course. When she had learned two days ago that Miroku and Sango were heading out on a youkai extermination requested by a neighboring village, she had insisted that Inuyasha go along with them. One never knew when Naraku would show up, and if he or another strong opponent appeared, the monk and slayer would stand a better chance with the hanyou present. Inuyasha protested, clearly wishing to go to the prenatal appointment with her, though he never said as much. Convincing him required some pleading, but eventually he relented. She also made him promise not to come back without Miroku and Sango, or to run Kirara into the ground in his haste to return on time. There would be other appointments, and she would not risk the lives of their friends, or the lives of the villagers needing assistance just so he could come to the first one.

This did not change the fact that she would feel much more comfortable with him here. It seemed like every time she had to wade into an unfamiliar and frightening situation in the feudal era, Inuyasha was by her side. She hadn’t realized how much she had come to rely on that until now. But her mother was the next best thing, she supposed. They weren’t likely to run into any truly dangerous situations in modern Tokyo at any rate, especially at this time of day. It was enough that Inuyasha wanted to be here, and was absent for a good reason.

Mama took her hand and squeezed it reassuringly. She probably knew what was troubling her, but didn’t comment on it, for which Kagome was grateful. She had been feeling a lot of gratitude over the past week. Her family had been remarkably supportive, especially her mother. Sure, Kagome occasionally caught looks of disappointment and worry from her, but they were fleeting and were not reflected in her mother’s behavior. Her grandfather had maintained his uneasy truce with Inuyasha, though it was clear that their ‘partnership’ arrangement was far too unofficial for his liking. Jii-chan still wanted her married before she gave birth, though at the moment he appeared willing to bite his tongue. How long that would last was anyone’s guess.

So overall, it had been a great week, a lengthy and much-needed break. Their little group would set out again as soon as Miroku and Sango returned, possibly as early as tomorrow morning. And when they did resume their quest, Kagome knew she would feel completely refreshed and ready to take on the feudal era again. Inuyasha had enjoyed the break as well, she suspected, though ‘break’ to a hanyou meant a day of rest and a really good night’s sleep. Achieving that, the remainder of the week probably seemed like a colossal waste of time to him. But to Kagome’s endless amazement, he never voiced that thought. He would occasionally let her clearly know that he was thinking it, with some impatient behavior or general grumpiness, but this she could ignore because it was nothing unusual for him to be bit surly. It helped that he had plenty to keep him busy, such as checking the lands around the village for signs of youkai, helping Jii-chan in the shed, and of course, watching television. Kagome cracked a smile at that. Inuyasha looked so incredibly adorable sitting in front of the TV. Legs crossed, back straight, ears perked up at attention, he looked like a dog watching a squirrel. Whereas for modern humans television was a comforting, predictable distraction from the real world, for Inuyasha almost everything he saw was completely new, and often fascinating.

It was because Inuyasha was well-occupied that this week had been productive for Kagome. She knew from experience that studying just did not work with him bothering her every ten minutes. She had been unable to go to school last Friday or this past Monday due to potential morning sickness. Normal school policy was to send students home after vomiting, which would defeat the purpose of going in the first place. And she was not yet ready to make her pregnancy public knowledge. She wasn’t even sure the school would allow her to continue to attend if they found out. And beyond that, she didn’t feel like dealing with the ridicule. Teenage pregnancy was extremely rare in this country, in this time, and she didn’t want to take any crap from a bunch of naïve girls who hadn’t _done_ anything with their lives. She’d slain dozens of youkai, mended wounds so severe that normal people would faint at the mere sight of them, and repeatedly faced down one the greatest evils the world had ever seen. What had her schoolmates done? Play sports and go on dates, nothing even remotely dangerous. Which was exactly why she didn’t feel like hearing it from them.

Instead of going to school, Kagome spent those two days plus the weekend catching up on her studies from the quiet interior of her bedroom. It was the most productive she had been in terms of schoolwork since first falling down the well on her fifteenth birthday.

Her mother’s prediction that her morning sickness would soon subside, based on how far along she was, proved to be correct. On Tuesday, after two straight days with no vomiting, she had finally gone to school with all fingers and toes crossed. There had been some nausea that day, as well as the next two, but nothing had come up. Her mother’s ginger tea was probably a big contributing factor there. She kept a thermos of it with her at all times, and drank some whenever she felt a little queasy. Her teachers had been fine with her keeping it on her desk during class; none had pressed her for details since they all thought she was naturally sickly.

School had been interesting for another reason, namely the exotic-looking young man who walked her there in the morning and met her at the gate in the afternoon. This arrangement had only continued for a day and a half, since Inuyasha had departed with Miroku and Sango after dropping her off on Wednesday, but she could only imagine the gossip going around. From the snippets she’d overheard, the general theme was about the Higurashi girl, always absent with mysterious illnesses, now coming to school with a handsome, silver-haired gang member. Oh, the scandalous possibilities. Kagome would admit that Inuyasha _did_ look like a gang member. With his hair dyed silver, or so they thought, his baggy clothes, and his hat worn backwards—a ‘helpful’ tip from Souta—he looked every bit the disgruntled youth rebelling against society. You know, the kind of boy that good girls were supposed to stay away from, but who sometimes proved irresistible.

Kagome didn’t know about that, but she definitely agreed that the modern clothing her mother had purchased looked good on him. But they were baggy, consisting mostly of loose-fitting jeans and slightly oversized t-shirts. As she had told her mother, ‘Inuyasha doesn’t do tight.’ Kagome quickly found that she didn’t care if he looked like the founding member of one of the strangest gangs in Tokyo. It was nice to have him with her, to be doing something that only couples did in this era, even something as innocent as him walking her to school.

She should have expected some fallout, of course, especially from her three girlfriends at school. That conversation at lunch on Tuesday with Eri, Yuka, and Ayumi had been _interesting_ as well. Perhaps ‘interrogation’ would have been a more appropriate term. Yes, that’s the violent jerk I told you about. No, he’s not full-blood Japanese. No, he’s not two-timing me anymore. Reluctant yes, when asked if we’ve kissed. Embarrassed stutter, when asked if we’ve done anything more. Desire to jump off the roof? Definitely yes.

Okay, so maybe it hadn’t been _that_ bad. Her friends were honestly glad to see her working things out with the boy she liked. They met him officially later that day at the school gate. Inuyasha had been civil, if not overly sociable. But she thought he’d made a decent impression on the three schoolgirls.

"Feeling better, sweetheart?"

Her mother’s voice broke her from her musings, and she realized she was still smiling. She nodded.

"Yep. Just thinking…"

Mama chuckled. "You always smile like that when thinking about him. Well, usually."

Kagome briefly considered what an open book she was, but her mother’s last two words threw her for a loop. She frowned contemplatively. Mama had seen her sad, angry, and even heartbroken because of Inuyasha, but had she ever been informed of the reason behind those emotions? Looking back, Kagome didn’t think so.

"Mama, did I ever tell you about Kikyou?"

"Is this ‘Kikyou’ person the reason you come back depressed sometimes?"

And there was Kagome’s answer. It was time to remedy that oversight. Now that she had moved into a sort of committed relationship with Inuyasha, her mother deserved to know about the ‘other woman’ in his life. Maybe it would help her to understand exactly what she and Inuyasha were to each other now, and why it had to be that way.

So Kagome told the tale, from Kikyou and Inuyasha’s budding relationship fifty years prior to her arrival in the feudal era, all the way through to Kikyou’s hurtful words a couple weeks ago. Her mother’s reaction shifted several times during the story, from initial sympathy, to sympathy mixed with annoyance, and finally to righteous indignation.

"I can’t believe she accused you of…of…ooh! That makes me so mad! And that Inuyasha! He’s getting a stern talking to the next time I see him."

"Mama, wait," Kagome pleaded, wondering if she should have omitted some of the less savory details. "Inuyasha was just in shock, the same as me. He apologized later. That night was when he promised to stay with me."

"For how long? Until your child is grown up?" her mother demanded incredulously, reading from Kagome’s reaction that she had hit the nail on the head. "And then what? Will he go to hell with this Kikyou witch?"

"I…"

"That’s terrible, Kagome! You need to set him straight. He either needs to commit to you or go with Kikyou. Tell him to quit stalling and just pick one of you already!"

"It’s not that simple, Mama!" Kagome retorted fiercely. She grimaced, seeing her mother’s point but knowing in her heart that it wasn’t right. Inuyasha had grown close to her _because_ she had never forced him to choose between herself and Kikyou. She had allowed him to become her best friend and possibly more without giving up his relationship with his former love. Without that concession, he would have kept her at arm’s length, because he had never been ready to move on from Kikyou even before her resurrection. Giving him that ultimatum now would only drive them apart, and potentially ruin any chances of him choosing her, Kagome, over Kikyou later. Now, how to explain that to her fuming mother…

"Mama, Inuyasha isn’t like most guys. He’s honorable to a fault, and he takes it really hard when he feels he’s let someone down. He feels responsible for Kikyou’s death. He thinks he owes her his _life_ , and no one is ever going to be able to tell him that he doesn’t. He has to figure it out on his own. All I can do is be there for him, try to show him what love and trust are really like. I…I love him, Mama. Please, _please_ don’t say anything to him."

Her mother studied her for several long moments, her gaze softening with understanding. Finally she leaned back in the seat with her eyes closed and heaved a frustrated sigh.

"Well, I’ll give you one thing," she conceded. "It’s really not simple at all. To have your old love interest come back from the grave and blame you for her untimely death…I really can’t imagine what that’s like."

"It’s hard even for me, and I’m Kikyou’s reincarnation," Kagome told her. "But I understand why Inuyasha feels the way he does. I accept him for who he is now. Don’t get me wrong; I _wish_ he felt differently. But, all I can do is be there for him," she repeated.

Her mother sighed again. "I hear you, Kagome. I don’t like it but…I hear you."

Kagome grinned and hugged her mother, exceedingly glad that she had come around, albeit grudgingly.

"Look at the bright side, Mama," she proclaimed cheerfully. "Inuyasha promising to be a parent with me is probably the biggest commitment he’s ever made in his life."

"Hm, that is something," her mother admitted reluctantly. "I suppose that the promise he made you was the most he felt able to give."

"Exactly!" Kagome exclaimed.

Mama put her face in her hands. "Ugh. My little girl is stuck in a love triangle," she lamented, only partially in jest. "With a hanyou from the past and a crazed undead witch, no less."

"Mama," Kagome scolded, "don’t be so hard on Kikyou." She immediately blanched, not quite believing that she had just gone to Kikyou’s defense. She mostly just wanted to soothe her mother’s indignation. But though Kikyou had done a lot wrong in both of her lives, she was not completely undeserving of sympathy.

"Her story really is tragic, Mama. When she found out that I was pregnant with Inuyasha’s child, I’m sure she was really hurt. I can only imagine how I’d feel if I found out that Inuyasha slept with Kikyou. And he and I don’t even have the history that the two of them do."

"I would say that you and Inuyasha are making your own history," her mother observed sagely. "May it be long and prosperous."

An awestruck "oh" was all Kagome could manage in response to her mother’s sincere well-wishing. That, and a watery smile which brought tears to both of their eyes. Kagome was suddenly very glad she had shared the complexities of her and Inuyasha’s relationship. Her mother did not like his informal and open-ended commitment to her, any more than her grandfather did. But she did make an effort to understand, and most importantly, she trusted Kagome to make her own decisions.

The remaining few minutes of the train ride passed in companionable silence. They arrived at the doctor’s office ten minutes early, and the doctor saw them on time, much to Kagome’s surprise. She was still nervous going in, despite her mother’s reassurances, but the doctor’s friendly demeanor—and the fact that she was female—did much to put her at ease. The doctor was clearly somewhat uncomfortable with Kagome’s age and marital status, but she promised that she would adhere to the privacy laws and not inform anyone, including her school. She was also pleased to learn that the man who had impregnated her was in the picture, but had been called away on ‘urgent business.’ Obviously, the doctor was thinking that a marriage during a pregnancy was vastly better than having a child out of wedlock. Kagome did not bother to elaborate on her and Inuyasha’s actual circumstances. Despite a certain amount of judgment, the doctor behaved with a high degree of professionalism, so the interview was fairly comfortable.

After the interview, the doctor performed a thorough physical examination which, while intrusive, was not as uncomfortable as Kagome feared. And what came afterwards completely chased all of her anxiety away. The ultrasound done at this early stage of pregnancy did not reveal much, mostly just a black void containing a tiny blob. The fetus appeared only vaguely humanoid. But it left Kagome utterly awestruck nonetheless. For within that tiny blob, pulsing with rapid, microscopic beats, was a newly-formed heart.

To wrap up the appointment, the doctor gave her advice regarding nutrition and what new developments she might expect in the coming weeks. Twice Kagome caught herself daydreaming, and was glad her mother was there to pick up the slack. She felt badly for Inuyasha, since she knew it would have been even more amazing for him to see the ultrasound. Growing up in the modern era, she at least had some idea of what to expect. Inuyasha would have been the first man from the feudal era to see his child’s heart beating in the womb. And if another ultrasound could be taken before fetal development had progressed far enough to reveal any youkai features, he still would be. Kagome just hoped he wouldn’t be too disappointed today.

She left the doctor’s office in high spirits, which rose even further when her mother declared that they were going to lunch at one of her favorite restaurants. It was a little café on this side of Tokyo that made amazing oden, but was out of the way so she didn’t get to eat there often. It just so happened that the restaurant was only a dozen or so blocks from the doctor’s office, as Kagome was thrilled to learn.

After their meal, the two of them went shopping, again at Mrs. Higurashi’s suggestion. Kagome did protest that her mother was spending too much money, but of course the latter brushed her off. Her exact words were, ‘What good is having money if I can’t spend it on my children and grandchildren?’ Among the items purchased were a book about pregnancy, a moisturizer for dry skin, a few bras without underwire—her mother guaranteed that she would soon be grateful for those—and a few sets of looser, more comfortable outer clothing. Kagome questioned the need for the clothing at present, but her mother responded that she had no idea what awaited her on the other side. There was a chance that unforeseen circumstances would prevent her and Inuyasha from returning for several months, by which time her school uniforms would cease to be wearable attire. Kagome shuddered at the mental image that little thought conjured up, and gave no further resistance about the clothing. She did persuade her mother to drop her body pillow idea, since that would be too big and bulky to take back with her. They were already going to be pushing the limits of what Inuyasha could tote around; strong as he was, he still only had two hands and one back.

They didn’t return to the shrine until late afternoon. Kagome was pleased to see a red-clad figure drop from the Goshinboku as they ascended the last few steps. Evidently Inuyasha had been waiting for them, and none too patiently.

"How’d it go?" he demanded as he walked over to meet them, utterly failing nonchalance. He seemed both worried and curious, and equally determined not to show it. Anyone with a set of eyes could see right through the charade, but Kagome decided to have some fun with him.

"Fine," she answered simply with a shrug, responding to his ‘casual’ question in kind. "How was the extermination? Tell me _everything._ "

Inuyasha growled in frustration. "Not much to tell," he snapped quickly. "Sango flushed it out easily, but then the bast— _youkai_ ," he corrected, glancing at Mrs. Higurashi. "Then it ran and I had to track it for half a day. Pain in my a— Ah, I mean, it was annoying as h— Ah…"

"Yes, Inuyasha, we understand," Mrs. Higurashi told him, sounding genuinely amused.

"Keh."

Kagome had to wonder if he was attempting to curtail his potty mouth for the sake of the baby, or because he didn’t want to swear in front of her mother. Probably the latter, she reflected. She would have to work on that over the next eight months, if he didn’t correct the problem on his own. Better to break the habit early and not slip up when the child was actually old enough to understand, and repeat, swear words.

"So how was the doctor’s visit?" Inuyasha asked again, more irritably this time. "And what the hell is all that?" He motioned to the bags the two women were carrying.

"Mama and I went shopping for some pregnancy-related items," Kagome answered matter-of-factly, half expecting him to be upset that they hadn’t come straight home from the doctor’s office. He might’ve said something along those lines, but Mrs. Higurashi broke in.

"I’ll take them inside, dear," she said, shifting her bags to one hand so she could take Kagome’s as well.

"Keh. I’ll take ‘em," Inuyasha declared, quickly snatching the bags from both women and huffily carrying them into the house. Kagome and her mother shared a look, each knowing that Inuyasha taking the bags was a way for him to express his gratitude without really saying ‘thank you.’ But Kagome figured she had thanked her mother enough for the both of them.

She had Inuyasha leave the bags on the kitchen table, promising to return and unpack them later, and led him upstairs to her room. Depending on how much detail he demanded, she might want parts of this conversation to be private.

"Okay," she began cheerfully, "what would you like to know?"

"Everything."

"Everything? Inuyasha," she teased, "I don’t think I can remember _everything_."

"I don’t care. Just tell me everything you can remember."

And for the first time, Kagome realized that he was being completely serious. His eyes bore a hardened edge of annoyance, but beneath swam frustration and guilt. Kagome felt her amusement evaporate, to be replaced by genuine warmth. It was heartening to see him so determined to be a part of her pregnancy. He had nothing to be sorry for, obviously, but it would do no good to tell him that. She had said it was okay if he missed the appointment before he left. While she would convey this message to him again nonverbally, the most effective way to make him feel better right now would be to comply with his request and tell him everything about her day.

Well, maybe not _everything_. There were some details about the appointment that no one with a Y chromosome needed to know about, especially one from the past with little knowledge of modern medical practices. And of course, she kept her conversation with her mother on the train to herself. But other than that, she was happy to share her experience with Inuyasha. He listened attentively, asking questions when he didn’t understand something, thought for the most part Kagome was able to anticipate the things he couldn’t comprehend and explain them. He seemed especially interested in the doctor herself, and how she had treated her, probably because she was a stranger and he hadn’t been there to protect her. He nodded in relief at Kagome’s positive review of the doctor’s demeanor and advice.

She skipped over the ultrasound altogether, not wanting to make him regret his absence even more. But her mind kept going back to it, wondering if it was the right choice to keep it from him. Finally, after a lengthy mental argument, she decided that he deserved to know. In retrospect, however, she should have prefaced her statement that she saw the baby’s heartbeat with some explanation of modern technology.

"You WHAT?!!!"

His panicked reaction took her aback, until she realized what he must be thinking. From his perspective, the only way to view a fetal heartbeat would be to cut the mother open. She could have kicked herself for her foolishness.

"Don’t worry, Inuyasha," she pleaded, holding both hands up to placate him. He looked like he was a hair’s breadth away from ripping off her shirt and inspecting every centimeter of her stomach for incisions. "They don’t actually cut you. Here, we have what’s called an ultrasound. It’s a special machine that can look inside you just by putting it on your belly. And it’s _completely_ harmless."

She could see the wheels turning in his head, his face sporting a confused frown as he tried to make sense of this entirely foreign technology. Finally, he crossed his arms over his chest and glared at her sternly.

"Is this something most women in your time have done?" At her vigorous nod, he relaxed visibly. "And you’re _sure_ it’s harmless?"

"Yes, Inuyasha. Would I do anything to hurt our baby?" she demanded, a little miffed by his lack of faith.

He grimaced at her tone, snorted as if to brush off her indignation, and swiftly changed the subject.

"So…you really saw the heartbeat?" he asked, his tone now one of wonder. Kagome smiled and nodded, her irritation forgotten. He stared down at her belly for a few seconds, then turned his head to the side and took to gazing out the window. The hint of jealousy in his expression came as no surprise, but the way his cheeks tinted pink in embarrassment was unexpected. He seemed to be mentally debating something, and Kagome couldn’t imagine what it was. Finally he spoke, bringing her curious ponderings to an end.

"Do you think…I could try to listen?"

Kagome stifled a gasp. Now she understood why he was embarrassed, as his proposal would require him to place his head against her stomach. Innocent physical contact, to be sure, but still certainly beyond his normal comfort zone. Kagome wasn’t sure it was within her comfort zone either, but she had no problem acquiescing to his request. She just didn’t want him to hear nothing and be disappointed. She would try to temper his expectations and keep him from getting his hopes up.

"S-sure, Inuyasha. But do you really think you’ll be able to hear anything? The heartbeat seemed so faint on the ultrasound."

He managed a semi-confident smirk. "These ain’t just for show, wench," he declared, wiggling his ears.

Kagome grinned despite her reservations. She would just have to hope that his faith in his hearing ability was not misplaced. Seeing her acceptance, Inuyasha knelt down before her and tentatively leaned his head against her stomach. Kagome nudged him lower, knowing the fetus was fairly close to her hips at this stage. He plastered his right ear against her shirt, covering his left ear with his hand and closing his eyes tightly, brow furrowed in concentration.

After about thirty seconds of this, Kagome could tell that it wasn’t going well. Inuyasha was starting to make little growls of frustration. Before he gave up and went into pout mode for the rest of the day, Kagome decided there was one thing left to try. She hoped her slightly elevated heartbeat would not interfere with his hearing. At least she had gone with jeans and a blouse today due to the chill in the air, rather than a dress.

"Here, try this," she told him, gently pushing him away. The annoyed look he shot her turned to shock when she lifted her shirt, baring her midriff. Kagome felt a small thrill at the way the sight of her still-flat stomach captivated him for a few moments. When he caught himself staring, he blushed hotly and glanced cautiously up at her, as if to ask if it was really okay. Her encouraging smile confirmed that it was, and he gulped, then slowly placed his ear to her navel.

She shuddered at the contact, tickled by his hair. Misinterpreting her involuntary movements, he began to pull away, but she caught him with her free hand and guided him back to his previous position. She moved him lower again, pulling down the waistline of her jeans just slightly to give him better access. She was flushing fiercely by the time all of this was accomplished, but was satisfied that she had done all she could to help him. Now she concentrated on breathing steadily and slowing her racing heartbeat.

For several moments, Inuyasha had no more luck than he had with the added barrier of her shirt. Then suddenly a gasp tore from his throat, his hands coming up to grasp her hips as he pulled her closer. Kagome held her breath, surprised by the increased pressure on her tummy but not worried; it was not nearly intense enough to hurt the baby. Mostly, she was simply ecstatic that Inuyasha was able to share this small moment with her, this first sensory affirmation of their parenthood. She had glimpsed their child with her eyes, and he with his ears. The look on his face was absolutely priceless; the word awestruck did not fully do it justice.

"Wow," was all he could manage in terms of speech. He stayed that way for several long moments, which felt like a small eternity to Kagome. Finally he seemed to realize that something was off with her, as he pulled back enough to gaze up at her face.

He smirked in amusement. "You can breathe, wench."

Kagome let out the breath she’d been holding in one huge whoosh. Inuyasha shook his head at her antics and went back to his new favorite pastime. Now one of his hands rested at the small of her back, holding her in place, all traces of his customary shyness temporarily gone. Kagome couldn’t blame him for that; seeing the heartbeat had been emotionally overwhelming for her as well. And she was glad to learn that Inuyasha could apparently still hear it even over her quiet breathing. She was sure this wouldn’t be the last time he asked to listen to the baby, and not having to hold her breath would make the experience much more pleasant for her.

At last he pulled away for good, still wearing an expression of wonder. He stood, grinned warmly at her for a moment, and enfolded her in a heartfelt embrace. Kagome could feel the gratitude rolling off him in waves. She laughed happily and hugged him back, closing her eyes and enjoying the moment.

"It kind of brings it home, doesn’t it?" she said. "We’re really having a baby." Here, in Inuyasha’s arms, it was easy to focus on the positive feelings that statement brought up, rather than fears and insecurities.

Inuyasha tensed, and Kagome wondered if she had said something wrong. But when she pulled back and gazed up at him, she found that he did not appear upset. He was frowning, but seemingly in contemplation, his eyes unfocused as if reliving a memory.

"Inuyasha?"

He jumped at the sound of her voice, but his frown did not go way. Instead, he focused his attention on her, as if she was the source of his confusion.

"I meant to ask," he began, speaking hesitantly. "The other day when we first came back here, your mom asked if you’d ‘definitely decided to have the baby.’ As if…as if there was another option. What did she mean?"

Kagome cringed at the question. What Inuyasha was referring to was when her mother had surreptitiously asked her if she had considered getting an abortion, a topic she had been hoping to avoid ever discussing with him. Perhaps that was foolish of her. Ultimately, it was her body and her choice. But they were partners in this, and as such Inuyasha probably deserved to know all of their options. But she dreaded what he might say. If he told her to abort the baby, what would she do? It would be a terrible situation to be in, since she wanted to keep it. If she gave in, she would never be able to look at herself the same way again. And if she refused, her relationship with Inuyasha would suffer a serious blow. But there was nothing for it. Now that he had posed the question, he wouldn’t let her get away with anything less than a straight answer.

"Mama was asking me if I’d thought about getting an abortion," Kagome admitted miserably.

"What’s that?"

"It’s a way to…terminate the pregnancy."

His eyes widened, but otherwise he made no overt reaction. "So…the baby would die?"

"Yes, it would."

"And you…thought about it?"

"I did," Kagome stated firmly. "And I decided that I didn’t want to do it."

Inuyasha digested that information silently, his neutral expression giving nothing away. Kagome began to fidget, literally itching to know what was going on inside that head of his. Finally, she could take no more of the silence.

"Inuyasha, you don’t think…I should get an abortion, do you?"

"No!"

The immediacy and forcefulness of his response surprised both of them. He drew back, sinking once more into contemplation. This time Kagome was content to give him time to fully gather his thoughts. There was no misinterpreting his one-word reply; he wanted to keep the baby as well. It filled her with warmth, and a desire to hug him again. But he looked like he wanted to say more, so she determined to wait patiently for him to speak.

"No," he repeated at last, "I don’t want you to get an abortion. I just…I’m surprised, is all."

"About what?"

"That you…I mean, you had a way out, Kagome. And you didn’t even think enough of it to tell me about it."

"Well you feel the same, so what does it matter if I told you or not?" she demanded defensively.

Inuyasha shook his head. "That’s not what I meant. You had a way out, Kagome. You could have escaped the burden of bearing my child. Me, some poor hanyou who can’t pass as human or even marry you like your family wants. There’s not another woman alive, now or in the past, who wouldn’t have leapt at that chance. And you…you probably didn’t even think about it for very long before deciding to keep our baby instead. That’s…"

His words failed him at this point, but the few tears pooling in his eyes spoke volumes. Kagome moved close and took his hands, holding them against her chest as she gazed up into his eyes, those breathtaking orbs of molten gold.

"You’re right, Inuyasha," she told him lovingly. "I didn’t think about it for very long. I didn’t have to. I…I would not have chosen this path two months ago. But now that I’m on it, I don’t want to go back. I want to bear your child. I want to live with you and raise our child together. And that’s really all there is to it."

Inuyasha closed his eyes and smiled, just a tiny upward curve of his lips. When he opened them again, Kagome gasped at the intensity burning within. There it was again, the unspoken love she thought she had glimpsed in the tree, the night he promised to stay with her. She remained frozen in place, captivated by his gaze, unable to move or speak. Fortunately, Inuyasha did not make her wait.

"That’s the most amazing thing," he declared, his tone soft and awestruck. "You don’t even seem to realize how special you are."

Then he was leaning toward her, his eyes sliding shut as he closed the distance, his lips pursing slightly. His arms slid around her, pulling her close, his hold loose enough so she could pull away if she wanted to. But Kagome had no thoughts of withdrawing. She took one step forward, allowing him to draw her in, standing on tiptoe as she leaned up to meet him.

They came together much as they had on that night almost three weeks ago. Their dry lips pressing chastely against each other, but creating so much heat that it felt like they might burn. But unlike that evening, Kagome was not satisfied. Inuyasha had probably intended the kiss as a sweet expression of gratitude, but this was not enough for her. And when he moved to pull away, she acted on her desires without thinking. She quickly looped her arms around his neck, pressing her body more fully against his while maintaining contact with his lips. Then she parted her lips and smoothly slipped her tongue inside his mouth.

She swallowed his shocked gasp, her body questing, seeking something of its own accord. His hands rose to her shoulders as if to push her away, but in the next moment a hungry growl emanated from his throat and his arms wrapped tightly around her. His tongue rose to duel passionately with hers, until finally Kagome gave up and allowed herself to be dominated. One of his hands slipped down to cup her denim-clad backside possessively, drawing a needy mewl from her as she realized that mere kissing was not enough either.

Inuyasha evidently reached the same conclusion. How they made it to her bed, Kagome would never know. One moment she was standing in his passionate embrace; the next she found herself sandwiched deliciously between the soft mattress and the intoxicating hardness of his body. Even more impressively, he had somehow executed the entire movement without breaking their lip lock. A pleasured groan escaped her throat as a clawed hand slipped under her shirt, leaving tendrils of flame dancing across her stomach. She arched her back, pressing her breasts against the hard planes of his chest, silently begging for more. He obliged, his hand moving slowly upwards, until the tips of his claws brushed the underside of her bra. She moaned into the kiss, throbbing with anticipation, losing control for just a split-second and accidentally biting his tongue.

And then her arms were empty, the heat which had enveloped her body torn cruelly away from her. She shivered at the sudden loss of warmth, or perhaps it was a shudder of unfulfilled need. When she leaned up on her elbows and opened her eyes, she spied Inuyasha squatting on the floor across the room. He was panting, staring at her with heavy-lidded eyes, his lips swollen and his cheeks flushed. It was then that higher brain function began to come back online for Kagome. She could see awareness returning to Inuyasha’s amber orbs as well, as both pairs of eyes widened impossibly. Inuyasha was the first to look away, but Kagome followed suit immediately thereafter. She found it nearly impossible to believe what had just occurred, but the tingling in her lips and the gradually receding heat in her body provided ample evidence. She supposed she should try to break the awkward silence, since she was the one who escalated the encounter from innocent to sexual. She shuddered again at the memory. She had never known that her body was capable of such passion. And Inuyasha had barely touched her.

She wondered how far they would have gone if she had not bitten his tongue. For once she was grateful for her inexperience with kissing, since it had provided a fortuitous interruption of their activities. The awkwardness they were now feeling would have grown exponentially worse the more intimate their encounter became. Still, a rather influential part of her was drowning in disappointment.

"Inuyasha." "Kagome."

Their eyes met briefly after their simultaneous utterances, then immediately broke off again.

"Go ahead," Inuyasha told her.

"N-no, please, you go ahead."

He grimaced. "I was just going to ask when your next appointment was."

"Oh. It’s, um…four weeks from yesterday. So twenty-seven days."

Inuyasha nodded. "I’ll go tell the others that we’re leaving first thing tomorrow." He rose to his feet and stalked toward the door.

"Wait!" Kagome cried, wobbling slightly as she stood. Her hand had reached out for him automatically, but she dropped it to her side. He had paused on his way to the door, and though his eyes were trained straight ahead, his left ear was turned in her direction.

"I’ll go with you," she said, almost pleading. "If that’s okay…"

He studied her for a moment, disparate emotions warring in his gaze. He looked like he simultaneously wanted to go back to making out and run away with his tail between his legs. She was glad when he instead chose a middle course, nodding in acceptance and exiting the room. She followed him downstairs, taking in his stiff movements and how tense his shoulders were. When she asked him to help her unpack the shopping bags, he complied without comment. As she removed the tags and folded her new clothes, Kagome kept glancing at his face, but she couldn’t get much of a read on his emotions. At the very least, he did not seem upset with her. Shocked and a bit scared maybe, but not angry.

Task completed, she led him out to the well house. They jumped into the time slip one after the other. In the feudal era, Inuyasha leapt out first and offered her a hand up, rather than simply grabbing her and carrying her out as he might have done normally. Kagome tried not to be too disheartened; it was natural for him to be somewhat edgy around her after their little make-out session. She just hoped he wouldn’t withdraw too far away from her emotionally.

They found Kaede’s hut empty save for the elderly miko. The rest of the Inu-gang was out doing various things, and Inuyasha immediately volunteered to go find them, leaving Kagome behind before she could even propose accompanying him. She got the feeling that what he really wanted was some time to himself. He probably wouldn’t even look for the others right away. She heaved a miserable sigh, now more worried than ever about what her impulsiveness had caused. Being with him like that had just felt so natural, so right, that she hadn’t thought of the consequences. She blushed lightly at the memory. With Inuyasha kissing and touching her like that, she hadn’t been thinking much of anything.

"You seem upset, child," Kaede observed. "Did something happen between you and Inuyasha?"

Kagome plastered on a fake smile. "No, Kaede-baa-chan. Everything’s fine; nothing happened." _You know, aside from me nearly taking Inuyasha to second base._

Kaede frowned but made no further comment on the subject. Instead, she walked to the center of the room and removed the pot from over the fire, adding wood and kindling to enliven the blaze. Then she sat down before the fire and motioned to the spot opposite her.

"Please sit, child."

Kagome moved closer to the fire, her curiosity peaked. "What’s this about, Kaede-baa-chan?"

Kaede shook her head. "You must trust me, child. Do as I say and ask no questions."

Now Kagome was officially weirded out, but she did trust Kaede, so she nodded her assent and did as she was bid. The old miko smiled reassuringly at her, then closed her eyes and began breathing slowly and deeply. Kagome found herself mirroring this behavior automatically.

"Good, child. Breathe deeply. You must clear your mind of all negative thoughts. Gaze into the fire, allow the flames to soothe you and bear your concerns away."

Idly, Kagome reflected that this was similar to what a modern hypnotist might say to put someone under. She was fairly certain that Kaede was not trying to hypnotize her, so she followed her instructions. Surprisingly, they seemed to have a significant effect. There _was_ something mesmerizing about the undulating flames, the reds, oranges and yellows dancing together in harmony.

"Good, child. Breathe deeply. Relax your muscles. Allow the tension to flow from your body. Breathe deeply."

She did, over and over again, the repetitive, calming action lulling her into a state of profound serenity.

"Good, child. You are at peace. Now, close your eyes."

She did.

"Good, child. You are at peace. Now, focus on the unborn child within you. Think about your love for this child, the strength of your desire to protect it from all harm, your hopes and dreams for the bright future it will have. Think only of your child. Breathe deeply."

Kagome felt a smile come to her lips. Pure warmth burgeoned in her chest, unadulterated love swelling her heart. In this state of absolute tranquility, she had never felt so happy to be pregnant.

"Now, child," Kaede stated, her voice carrying a sense of urgency this time. "Reach down within yourself. Find your spiritual center, and call upon the power you once wielded."

The old miko’s voice continued to repeat this message, seemingly growing farther and farther away until Kagome lost it altogether. For several moments she felt nothing, only a dark void surrounding her. Then, below her feet, a light appeared. Gradually she descended, the light continually growing brighter and larger until it enveloped her entire being. The light was her, and she was the light. It felt like meeting a long lost friend. And with a mother’s unbridled love warming her heart, she embraced the light with everything she was.

"Now open your eyes, child."

The proximity of Kaede’s voice surprised her. When her eyelids struggled open, still weighed down by her trance-like state, she found the old miko grinning broadly at her from across the fire. The firelight danced across her wizened visage, but there was something else, another source of illumination which cast a pinkish glow entirely unlike the fierce flames. It took Kagome a moment to realize that the source of this otherworldly aura was her.

She gasped, her whole body seizing up at once and dropping her roughly back into reality. She ran her hands all over her body, but the mysterious glow was already gone. There was no mistaking its identity, however. Even now, she could feel the residual tingle of her spiritual energy on her skin, sense the power resting deep down inside her as it used to. Light had replaced the void which had gripped her ever since her child’s conception. Too stunned to rejoice, she instead turned to her mentor.

"How?" was all she could manage.

"Do you know why most of the people in this world would say that you lost your spiritual power, Kagome?" Kaede posed sagely. She waited a few moments for a response, but none was forthcoming from her dazed pupil. "Most would blame the loss of your purity as the culprit. They would be correct…and entirely wrong. It was not the act of having relations with Inuyasha which caused your power to become dormant, but the child he left in your womb. In terms of raw power, you rival my sister. But you are untrained, and do not possess the experience to fully control your abilities. Had you been able to access your spiritual energy before today, you would likely have accidentally purified the quarter-youkai child within you. For a creature so small and fragile, this would surely have resulted in death. Spiritual power flows from a person’s soul. Even though you did not realize you were with child, your soul instinctively comprehended the danger and rendered your spiritual energy dormant.

"And now, you have reestablished the connection with that part of yourself once more. You have learned how to channel your energy around your child so that it will not be harmed. As long as you fight with a mother’s love in your heart, you will be able to fight as a miko."

As the import of Kaede’s words sank in, Kagome’s stupor subsided. Excitement rose within her, threatening to boil over into celebratory cheers. The burden of helplessness, which had weighed so heavily upon her, was finally lifted. She could protect her friends in battle again. In a way, now that she had her power back, she was glad that she had temporarily lost it. Absent that turn of events, she might never have learned how much they valued her company. Still, to be whole again before resuming their quest was a greater gift than she could have ever hoped for.

She ran around the fire and nearly tackled Kaede with an exuberant embrace.

"Thank you! Thank you so much, Kaede-baa-chan!"

The old miko chuckled, as much as she could with her lungs compressed as they were.

"Think nothing of it, child. I am glad my hunch proved correct."

"Your hunch?"

"Aye, child. ‘Twas only a hunch. I was not certain it would work."

"Well, I’m _so_ glad that it did. Thank you."

"You are most welcome, Kagome. Now, go find a quiet place and practice summoning your power until it becomes second nature to you. In the heat of battle, you must be as quick as you ever were."

Kagome nodded resolutely, and after a few more expressions of gratitude thrown in for good measure, left the hut to find somewhere to practice her newly rediscovered abilities. Somewhere she felt comfortable, somewhere she could focus… She knew the perfect spot.

* * *

Inuyasha took a deep breath in an attempt to calm his raging blood, and immediately regretted it. He had thought that spending a little alone time in Goshinboku would help him relax, but the front of his clothing still smelled very strongly of Kagome. And not her typical sweet, innocent aroma either. No, this one was far more sensual, calling out to the lustful, animalistic side of him. He shook his head to banish the memories, but they were persistent. A minute later he caught himself daydreaming with an appreciative growl rumbling in his throat. He glared down at the tent in his hakama as if it were the source of all his problems, and adjusted himself to make it more comfortable. The damn thing had been going up and down ever since he’d escaped from Kagome’s clutches.

Yes, he’d escaped all right…after getting himself into trouble in the first place. He was an idiot; he should have put a stop to their hot and heavy lip lock immediately. He’d almost managed it, right after she deepened the kiss, but then his brain had switched off with a resounding ‘ah, fuck it.’ And the rest, as they say, is history.

The unfortunate thing about history was that it could never be undone. There was little point in second-guessing himself now, but he was damn sure going to do it, if only to give himself something to feel guilty over. He was a man, and as such he should be in control of his urges at all times. But on the other hand, he was a _man_ , and how the hell was any man supposed to resist when a beautiful girl threw herself at him like that? What was that saying Miroku liked to use? ‘Shame on a man who does not accept a woman’s proposition.’ That had always seemed like a flimsy excuse when the bouzu used it, and it felt the same now. He was just grateful that Kagome had bitten his tongue when she did. The sudden pain woke him up to exactly what they were doing. And where his hand had almost been.

It was scary how passionate they had become so quickly, and how easy it was to fall under Kagome’s spell. Not that her enchantment had been intentional; she had honestly seemed to be simply reacting to touch and taste, the same as him. And it was abundantly clear that she had enjoyed everything he’d been doing. She had wordlessly begged for more, and he had been only too happy to oblige. Again, he was glad it had ended before they went too far.

That of course begged the question—what was too far? His preference in women certainly wasn’t the problem; he did not regret anything they had done for his own sake. And as he’d previously concluded, nothing he did with Kagome felt like a betrayal of Kikyou. But there was a big difference between an accidental drunken tryst and knowingly engaging in sexual activity while sober. Kikyou had told them to feel free to continue their ‘fornications,’ but that didn’t mean anything given her state of mind at the time. So the question was whether he betrayed Kikyou by partaking in those activities with Kagome now.

The answer was unclear, his conscience muddied. Logically, he _should_ feel bad for what he did, for surrendering to Kagome’s loving embrace while he was still promised to Kikyou. But again, it didn’t _feel_ like a betrayal. Either his conscience was broken, or it was trying to tell him something.

His conscience did choose that moment to hit him with some guilt, so maybe it wasn’t broken after all. But the source of said guilt was surprising. It wasn’t Kikyou he felt bad for, but Kagome herself. After all, men and women from his time normally only fooled around when there was at least a promise of marriage in place. What could he promise Kagome? That he would stay with her until their child was an adult. And that was it. Fifteen years tops, less if some unforeseen tragedy struck. Hell, he couldn’t even guarantee that their child would make it out of the womb alive. And on this lamest, flimsiest of promises, Kagome was willing to let him kiss her, hold her, touch her in places no one else could. She would have given herself to him completely this afternoon, had their encounter been allowed to progress to its natural conclusion.

Clearly, this was not fair to Kagome. And she obviously could not be counted on to correctly judge what was fair, since she been the one who escalated their contact from innocent to sexual. If he pressed her on it, she would probably say something like ‘Why don’t you let me decide what’s fair.’ Her heart was that big. If she wanted to be with him in that way, she would push toward that goal without reservation. Because she clearly didn’t care if she was getting the raw end of the deal. Otherwise, she wouldn’t be carrying his child right now. She would have gone to get an abortion the minute she came through the well.

He shook his head, still not quite believing that Kagome had rejected such an opportunity. She had _chosen_ to bear his child, when no one would have thought less of her for choosing otherwise. It was beyond incredible to him. And that was why he needed to control himself around her, why what happened this afternoon couldn’t happen again. She was an amazing person, and he didn’t deserve her. She deserved someone who would cherish her for the rest of her days, who could be there for her until his last dying breath. And he could not make either promise. If there came a time when the situation changed, and he was free to give his life to her, then he would revisit his decision. But until that day, he would keep his distance. It would be hard, on both of them, but it was for Kagome’s own good.

And if things didn’t work out, he hoped she would find love with someone else. He didn’t want her to be lonely for the rest of her life, despite how jealous the thought of her being with another man made him feel. But he didn’t get to keep her for himself and not give himself to her in return. It didn’t work that way. And someday, she would understand that. She might even thank him for it.

Someday. She would certainly _not_ thank him for his discretion today, or anytime soon for that matter. There were times for being open and honest with her, and there were times when she just didn’t need to know everything going on inside his head. This was one of the latter. So when her scent wafted to him on the breeze, he didn’t panic. Whether she was out here looking for him or on her way back to her time, he would play it cool.

She jogged into view a few moments later, excited and breathless. Inuyasha swallowed hard, imagining that she might look much the same in the afterglow of making love. After mentally beating his perverted imagination senseless, he leapt down from the tree to land a few meters in front of her. Watching her secretly from above would only make encourage his wayward imagination.

She gave a little cry of fright at his appearance, and stumbled back a step while holding a hand over her heart. To his horror, this action also struck him as oddly erotic. He groaned internally. It was hopeless. Completely fucking hopeless.

"What’re you doing out here, wench?" he demanded, crossing his arms over his chest. He didn’t like her wandering off on her own, no matter how close she was to the village or the well. Plus, feigning anger was a nice way to cover those other, unmentionable feelings.

She brightened immediately, which surprised him. And when she sauntered over to him with an eager grin and a mischievous glint in her eye, he seriously considered bolting. But as it was, her presence and scent rooted him to the spot. He stood there helplessly as she grabbed his hand, then closed her eyes and concentrated.

"Aack!" he cried, yanking his hand away from the stinging sensation. "What the fuck was th—"

He froze, suddenly understanding why Kagome was so happy. She was literally bouncing with excitement. His reaction was more muted, but a genuine smile came to his lips. With issues seemingly piling up between them as of late, it was nice to put one in the ‘solved’ category.

"So you got your power back, eh wench?"

"Yep! It was because I didn’t know how to channel the energy around the baby, but Kaede-baa-chan showed me. I was going practice under Goshinboku, but I guess I could do it in my time…"

He shrugged. "Practice here. It don’t matter to me."

"Are you sure? You don’t mind?" she asked, her tone doubtful. She probably thought that he wouldn’t want to be around her right now, he reflected. Understandable, given how he’d ditched her earlier. But honestly, once he’d had some time alone to think, he’d found that nothing was further from the truth. Perhaps it was the sudden good news, but much of the awkwardness between them had already worn off. And when he’d sworn to himself to keep her at arm’s length, he’d only meant in the physical sense. Talking to her and just spending time with her in general—these he could handle. If he were being truly honest, he would admit that those times were often the highlight of his day. The last thing he wanted was to lose them.

But obviously, he wasn’t ready to admit any of this aloud.

"Keh. Someone has to keep an eye on you, wench."

Without further comment, he leapt up to his previous perch. He’d meant his statement as playful, and Kagome appeared to take it as such. She settled down underneath him, and he observed her casually as she practiced summoning her spiritual energy. By the end of the session, he could tell she was quite satisfied, and he felt a surge of pride. She had come so far since those early days, transformed from ditzy schoolgirl to confident miko and mother-to-be. He knew he had done some growing up as well, mostly thanks to her. He thought back to that afternoon in the well, the day they’d returned to the modern era. It was solely due to her unwavering faith that he held out hope that he could be a decent father. Because she believed in him, he could believe in himself.

She clapped her hands together and stood, turning to gaze up at him.

"I’m going to go have one more hot bath before we head out tomorrow. Want to come back with me? I’ll make you some ramen."

He snorted, secretly amused that she still thought she had to bribe him with ramen. He had planned to go with her anyway, but there was no way in hell he was going to turn that offer down.

Grinning, he vaulted down from the tree and moved to join her.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – If you were wondering, I had always planned to have Inuyasha decide to keep his distance. From my read of him in canon, he seems to understand how Kagome gets a raw deal. But of course he’s too attached to her to refuse when she offers to stay with him anyway.


	10. Of Wolves and Monkeys

A rabbit darted across the path, paused to eye them cautiously, then hopped into the underbrush and disappeared from view. Kagome thought Inuyasha might go after it, as it was getting late in the day, but aside from the casual flick of an ear the hanyou showed no interest. That probably meant he wanted ramen for dinner, which was fine with her since they hadn’t eaten it since starting this expedition. They were four days out from Kaede’s village and making good time, heading for the approximate area where they had previously turned back in order to resume their search for signs of Naraku. Inuyasha was pushing them, but not as hard as he could have.

Kagome glanced at him from her place by his side, perhaps a meter or so separating them. Normally she would walk with Sango, but lately she had been spending a portion of each day with Inuyasha. He didn’t seem to mind. In fact, ever since they departed, his demeanor had been one of quiet contentment. Maybe he was just glad to be on the road again, but Kagome liked to imagine that it was at least in part because of what their encounter in her room must have revealed to him about her feelings. Whether that was true or simply a pipe dream, she couldn’t say. But surely he didn’t attribute her passion that day solely to pregnancy-related mood swings. She had learned that Inuyasha had in fact been speaking to Kaede about pregnancy, but the old miko refused to divulge any details about what they had discussed. In the end, Kagome decided to respect his privacy; she was simply grateful for his level of interest.

There was, however, one thing which she was not so pleased about. For as contented as Inuyasha seemed to be, he was also keeping his distance from her. It was subtle, so much so that the rest of their friends had probably not noticed it. But it was clear as day to Kagome. For example, if she tried to close the distance between them right now, he would slowly move away from her over the next several minutes. It didn’t interfere with their mobility; on the couple occasions when he’d had to carry her, he’d shown no hesitation in doing so. But the rest of the time, when there was no danger to be found, it seemed that he didn’t want to get too close. It had bothered her on the first day, and she had nearly called him on it. But in the end she bit her tongue in the interests of avoiding a fight. And eventually she had accepted that this was how it had to be for now. If he wanted a little more personal space, she would give it to him. At least he wasn’t pushing her away or withdrawing emotionally; when they talked, she didn’t notice any change in him at all. It was just the physical contact which seemed to worry him.

Understandably so, given recent events. Locked in their passionate embrace, neither of them would have noticed if the freaking house had come down around them. She wasn’t surprised that Inuyasha was a bit spooked by the whole thing. And she couldn’t really stay disappointed for too long, not when he’d been so incredibly sweet as well. She smiled at the memory.

The night before their departure from the modern era, and possibly because of what had happened the last time she was in the past, Kagome had woken up at about three o’clock in the morning with nightmares. Or rather, Inuyasha had woken her up. Judging by his guilt-ridden expression, he’d known exactly what she’d been dreaming about. She didn’t remember all the details, but Kikyou and Inuyasha had featured prominently. Enough said. She tried to go back to sleep afterwards, but the nightmare had left her too shaken.

Later that morning, as she was changing into the clothes she would wear in the feudal era, she pulled out a school uniform and stared at it. The garments looked so innocent, but all her fatigue-clouded mind could think about was what Kikyou had said. _When a pretty girl dresses like a whore, she must be advertising herself as such._ And suddenly she couldn’t stomach the idea of wearing that short skirt anymore. Whatever validity Kikyou’s comments might or might not possess, Kagome had to admit that her choice of garb was, by the standards of the age, very revealing in the leg for an adult woman. And in the eyes of the feudal era, she was an adult.

She opted instead for a sun dress which flowed almost down to her knees, with a long-sleeved blouse worn over it. She didn’t really like how the outfit looked on her, but that was probably because she was so used to wearing her uniform. She would get used to it, as would everyone else. She just hoped that nobody bugged her about it. This was, of course, a fool’s hope.

"What’re you wearing, wench?" Inuyasha asked when he saw her, openly curious. At this stage, Kagome thought she imagined the twinge of disappointment in his tone.

"Something different," she answered curtly. At his questioning look, she groaned and muttered an excuse. "I’m pregnant, Inuyasha. I can’t be running around in my school uniform anymore."

"Oh," he replied somberly, leaving no doubt this time that his displeasure was real. "But you’re not big yet."

"So?"

"So, uh…"

"Inuyasha, why do you even care what I wear?" Kagome demanded irritably.

"I don’t!" he retorted automatically, and for a moment Kagome thought he was going to throw an insult her way and storm off like he usually did in this sort of situation. Instead he bit his lip, rubbed the back of his neck with his hand, and spoke hesitantly.

"I mean, I…uh, I kinda like your uniform. It…suits you."

Kagome’s jaw dropped; she was left utterly speechless. Her mind worked overtime to discern the meaning behind his statement. His desire to see her in the uniform could naturally be taken as lecherous, but no matter how hard she looked she couldn’t detect any hint of playfulness in his expression or tone. Nor was this about keeping her from looking like Kikyou, since their style of dress was still completely different and she wasn’t wearing red or white. No, he appeared to simply be offering his honest opinion, without any motives behind it except his personal preference. It took her a long time to come to terms with this, since that sort of statement was so unusual for him. All the while, she stared at him. But eventually, as his cheeks flushed and he started to fidget nervously, she could reach no other conclusion.

"F-forget it," he told her gruffly, turning his back and crossing his arms over his chest. "Wear what you want."

Still Kagome stared, taking in his slumped posture and drooped ears. Finally, she turned and walked back upstairs without a word. She sat on her bed, studying the uniform again. So innocent, yet so revealing. It was easy to forget the latter point at school, since every girl wore the same outfit. It was not so in the feudal era; to many, her choice of attire must seem rather scandalous. But was that truly important? Her friends didn’t think she dressed like a whore. _Inuyasha_ didn’t think she dressed like a whore. He _preferred_ to see her wearing the uniform, not because it was revealing but because he honestly liked how she looked in it. It suited her.

When she jogged down the stairs minutes later, her footsteps were light and practically whimsical. Inuyasha did not smile when he saw her, but his eyes glowed with relief. And later, when he thought she wasn’t looking, he grinned happily.

So that was the story of how Kagome had come to still be wearing her school uniform, short skirt and all. With her friends, she was as confident and comfortable as ever. She would have to see how it felt the next time they were around strangers, or Kikyou. But no matter what, she would draw her self-esteem from the people most important to her from now on. She would wear her uniform for as long as it looked and felt okay. Then Inuyasha would just have to get used to sweatpants and oversized shirts. But for now, she was happy to honor his preference.

She wasn’t really sure how long that would last. She was just starting to show now, her belly no longer completely flat. Her breasts were swelling as well and were sometimes quite tender, causing her to stuff her old bras into the bottom of her bag in favor of the new ones her mother had bought for her. Morning sickness was becoming more sporadic now, but she still carried a thermos of ginger tea at all times, making more as needed. The prenatal vitamins and healthy food options brought from her time aided with the maintenance of good general health. She had noticed a little moodiness at times, but nothing to write home about. Plenty of rest helped with that, which Inuyasha always made sure she got. On the first night in the feudal era, he’d let her sleep in a bit to catch up on sleep lost due to her nightmare the previous evening. He’d offered to carry her a couple times as well. So far she’d politely declined, but fairly soon she knew she’d be literally jumping at the chance to get off her feet for a while.

Overall, things were going very well. Aside from the physical distance Inuyasha had imposed, she had nothing to complain about. But somehow, even when the outlook seemed so positive, trouble was never far away.

She and Inuyasha froze and looked at each other simultaneously, one alerted by scent and the other by approaching shards of the Shikon no Tama. Both knew this was going to be unpleasant. Inuyasha placed his hand on Tetsusaiga, but left the sword undrawn.

"Kagome," he stated seriously. "Whatever you do, don’t ‘osuwari’ me."

Kagome didn’t have time to contemplate his meaning before the telltale whirlwind belonging to their unwelcome guest appeared on the horizon. Inuyasha moved to intercept, but Kouga dodged right around him and skidded to a halt in front of Kagome, grabbing her hands with an easy, confident smirk as he always did.

"Hey, Kagome."

"H-hello, Kouga-kun."

Even before the greeting was fully out of her mouth, Kagome knew the pleasantries were over. Kouga grabbed her upper arm none too gently, pulling her close so he could furiously sniff her neck. Then he stumbled back a step, still maintaining his harsh grip, and stared at her, his vivid blue eyes impossibly wide. His fanged lower jaw moved soundlessly, the muscles in his neck tensing repeatedly. Kagome stifled her sudden spike of fear, revisiting her belief that Kouga would never truly hurt her. She still adhered to that theory, but was disturbingly not as confident as she used to be. Inuyasha too seemed to sense the danger in the air.

"Let her go, wolf," he ordered, voice low and hard as iron. That seemed to snap Kouga out of his trance. Kagome gasped at the way his jaw clenched in fury, the sudden glint of murderous intent in his eyes.

"Inu-kurro," he snarled, rounding on Inuyasha. "What did you do to _my woman?!_ "

"She ain’t your woman, bastard. And she never will be."

With a sound that was half growl, half roar, Kouga charged, his form shifting into a sharp blur in a fraction of a second. Fortunately, Inuyasha was ready for this, and managed to dodge to the side. But even so, there wasn’t much room for error. The wolf’s ire had not slowed him down; if anything, the rage pumping through his system had made him faster.

"Kouga-kun, stop it!" Kagome cried, quickly seeing that it was no use. At least now she understood why Inuyasha had asked her not to ‘osuwari’ him; being subdued by the rosary now would spell disaster. Kouga was going all out, making full use of his claws. He was unlikely to be able to kill the tough hanyou in one strike, but a blow from claw or fist could do serious damage. Inuyasha was staying on the defensive, mostly dodging and retreating. Kagome realized that this was for her sake, as Inuyasha would never fight this way otherwise. He would go toe-to-toe with his enemy, willing to trade blow for blow and count on his body to hold up. And he might have drawn Tetsusaiga by now as well.

So clearly Inuyasha was holding himself back because she valued Kouga as a friend. That meant it was up to her to stop this. But how? A purifying arrow would get Kouga’s attention, but the two of them moved so fast that she didn’t trust herself to fire one between them. Kami forbid she hit Inuyasha and turn him human, or Kouga and kill him outright. If she was forced to choose between the two of them, she knew who she would save. And what she would have to do. But that was the last resort; she would exhaust all other possibilities before striking down a friend, even one crazed with anger and grief. But what else was there? How on earth could she get through to Kouga?

"Dammit!" she swore, beyond frustrated at her lack of ideas and general sense of helplessness. Then something magical happened. At her cry, both Inuyasha and Kouga turned to gaze at her for just a split-second, as if checking that the object of their dispute was okay before resuming the battle. And suddenly, Kagome had an idea. It was sneaky and underhanded, but she would use against them the one thing both antagonists shared—their concern for her.

"Oh, my head," she announced, swooning. "I think I’m gonna faint."

Then she closed her eyes and flopped onto the ground on her backside, seemingly on the verge of losing consciousness. And when she opened her eyes, she found both Kouga and Inuyasha kneeling before her side by side. They gazed at her with uninhibited worry, all thoughts of maiming each other temporarily forgotten. If there was a feudal era acting award, she was a freaking shoe-in.

She lunged, snatching one of their wrists in each of hers, and wedging herself between them. It was a snug fit at first, but both males backed up a bit so they could see what was going on. Kagome faced Kouga, both because he was the aggressor and she wanted him to see that she was willing to defend Inuyasha. But she didn’t need to look at the hanyou to know that he was just as pissed about this turn of events as the wolf prince. Thinking quickly, she put a small amount of spiritual energy into her hands, just enough to get their attention.

"I’m not letting go," she declared resolutely. "If you pull away now, you’ll rip my arms off."

It was a bluff, to be sure. She had no idea what affect the little bit of power in her hands would have on the strength of her grip, if any. But as long as Kouga believed her, or even had some doubt, he would not pull away. Or so she hoped.

"Let me go, Kagome," the wolf prince snarled. "I’m gonna kill that bastard!"

"No, you’re not!" Kagome retorted before Inuyasha could butt in. Kouga appeared temporarily taken aback; this was the first time since they became friends that she had raised her voice to him. Seeing her opportunity, Kagome went on the attack.

"Kouga-kun, please," she cooed, using every ounce of charm she possessed. "Calm down. Let me talk to you."

"There’s nothing to talk about," the wolf ground out. "I know what he did!" he yelled, raising his free hand to drive it through Inuyasha’s skull. Kagome reacted automatically, driven by the instinctive desire to protect a loved one. She pushed against Kouga’s chest with both hands and called upon her spiritual energy. And with Inuyasha’s life at stake, her execution was perfect, right down to remembering to channel the energy around the baby.

Kouga screamed in agony as pure energy crackled around him, but the contact lasted only a fraction of a second. The momentum of her shove and a spasmodic firing of his leg muscles launched him into the air to land on his back with a dull thud a half dozen meters away. For several moments he lay still, the only movement the wisps of smoke rising from his chest, and Kagome thought she had killed him. Then a miserable groan escaped his throat, and he began to stir. Kagome stood, pure adrenaline surging through her veins. Yet her hands were steady, her eyes steely, utterly devoid of their usual compassion. This youkai had attacked the man she loved. He would not be allowed to do so again. Kagome nocked an arrow, drew back her bow, and waited.

It took Kouga almost a full minute to find the strength and coordination required to lean up on his elbows and gaze blearily at them. When his vision finally cleared, words failed him. He appeared understandably shocked to be staring down the shaft of Kagome’s arrow. Her expression left no doubt that she would fire if she had to, that slight quiver of her bottom lip notwithstanding. Inuyasha stood behind her, his hand on her shoulder providing silent support. His glare was angry as expected, but also accusing as if he, Kouga was the cause of this entire mess.

Kagome could tell when the wolf prince began to second-guess himself, when blind rage gave way to observation and reason. He sat up and leaned his elbows on raised knees, resting his forehead in his hands. When he eventually lifted his head, his expression was hard, guarded. But it could not completely conceal the hurt. Kagome felt a flash of sympathy, but did not lower her bow.

"He didn’t…force you, did he?"

Part of her wanted to smack Kouga for that comment. The very notion was ludicrous. Inuyasha was as sexually repressed as they came; he didn’t have it in him to rape anyone, least of all her. Not to mention the fact that he just wasn’t like that. Deep down, Kouga probably hadn’t even believed it; he had just needed an excuse to attack Inuyasha because the hanyou had taken ‘his woman.’ It pissed Kagome off to no end, but she reigned in her ire. Kouga had lost his cool, as everyone did sometimes. The difference was that as a youkai he was incredibly dangerous at those times. As was Inuyasha. Would the hanyou have reacted much differently if their situations were reversed? She wasn’t sure. But the bottom line was that she was willing to cut Kouga a _little_ slack because no harm had been done thus far. If he was ready to be reasonable, then she would let him live. Whether their friendship would ever recover was not her primary concern at the moment.

"No, he didn’t," she answered curtly, leaving no doubt as to what she thought of his question. She was satisfied at his flinch, but knew that this wasn’t the end of the inquiry.

"So, you chose him over me?"

There was that pesky sympathy again. Kouga looked and sounded so pathetic, like a lost puppy. If Kagome regretted one thing, it was allowing the wolf prince to think he had any chance with her. She should have set him straight months ago; that would have saved both of them a lot of stress and heartache. But as she could not change the past, the only thing to do was move forward. So despite her guilt, she would not sugar coat this for Kouga. There would be no misunderstandings this time.

"Yes, I did."

Kouga frowned in consternation. "Why?"

It was a one-word query, but Kagome sensed so much meaning in that single syllable. There was old youkai prejudice rearing its ugly head. After all, why would anyone, including a human, choose a hanyou over a full-blood youkai? To a man like Kouga, raised to believe that youkai, and ookami in particular, were superior to all other races, it must have been quite a shock. Especially losing to a hanyou, who might be regarded as even lower than humans. Beyond the race issue, his unflattering opinion of Inuyasha as a person was clearly on display here as well. Some of the criticisms that Kouga could make of the hanyou were surely valid, but the wolf had also seen only a small part of the man Inuyasha was. He had not glimpsed the loving, caring side of the hanyou she had come to love. On the surface, Inuyasha was foul-mouthed, thick-headed, and often insulting. Kouga probably didn’t think that he treated her as she deserved to be treated. Again, that was because the wolf prince was only privy to a superficial fraction of their relationship. He didn’t know how Inuyasha treated her when they were alone, or with trusted friends. He had only observed their behavior when they were in danger or when a rival male was present.

In this case, Kagome found it hard to blame Kouga for his lack of insight. Most youkai looked down on hanyou, and Inuyasha only revealed his softer side around people he trusted. She herself was the only one who had ever glimpsed some of the true depths of his heart. And since the hanyou was naturally jealous and hostile when Kouga was around, what chance did the wolf have of seeing his good side?

So again, she would refrain from snapping at Kouga or chewing him out. He had asked a simple question, and it had a simple answer. Her dilemma was whether to reply with complete honesty. She could conjure up some rationale that would make sense to Kouga; for example, because Inuyasha protected her and provided for her better than she thought anyone else could. Or perhaps because he had grown so powerful and was well on the way to mastering Tetsusaiga, the strongest sword in existence. She could even confess the true circumstances of their child’s conception and explain their somewhat committed relationship as a product of bad luck. Ultimately, however, all of these options left a sour taste in her mouth. She wanted to do none of them. But she also was not comfortable being truly honest with Kouga, or Inuyasha, about the real reason she had chosen the hanyou. Their relationship was still too unsettled, too ambiguous, and she didn’t have the nerve. So she settled on a compromised approach, one which would hopefully satisfy Kouga without revealing too much about her feelings.

"Inuyasha is the only man I’ve ever seen in that way, Kouga-kun."

A disturbing noise came from behind her, sounding like a barely-stifled gasp, and Inuyasha’s grip on her shoulder tightened. And suddenly Kagome was very glad she had decided against openly declaring her love, as she’d contemplated. If Inuyasha was shocked by her actual statement, he probably would have keeled over if she’d fully bared her heart.

In the end, Kouga’s facial expression seemed to indicate that he might actually have understood what she was really talking about. If so, all the better. Love was irrational, and a predominantly human emotion. Kouga could blame her decision on the unrivaled sentimentality of human females if he wanted to. But he would accept it as something he could never change, even if he couldn’t understand it.

Slowly and without further comment, the wolf prince rose gingerly to his feet. He turned his back to them, as if unable to stomach the sight of her and Inuyasha standing united any longer. Now that the danger had passed, Kagome felt her compassion swell. She could only imagine how hard this was for Kouga, in part because she had led him on for so long. She only wished she could make it right.

"Kouga-kun, y-you don’t have to leave," she told him, her tone slightly pleading. "We can talk."

"Like I said," he replied sadly as air and dust began to swirl around his feet. "There’s nothing to talk about."

In moments, Kouga’s whirlwind had disappeared over the horizon. It had moved significantly slower than normal at first, likely a result of the lingering effects of her purifying energy, but it seemed to be picking up speed as it vanished from view.

The strength in Kagome’s legs deserted her abruptly, and she collapsed onto her backside, this time unintentionally. All of the rampant emotions which she had held back in front of Kouga burst forth, no longer restrained by raw adrenaline and determination. She curled into a ball and rested her forehead on her knees, expecting to cry for a few minutes in solitude, or perhaps with Sango attempting to give comfort. When a hard male body settled behind her instead, she sobbed and threw herself into the owner’s chest. Inuyasha’s arms settled around her, his chin resting on the top of her head as she cried. Where his policy about personal space had gone, Kagome couldn’t say. But she was grateful that he had decided to grant her an exception in this instance.

Comforted by the fact that Inuyasha was still willing to comfort her, Kagome regained her composure fairly quickly. Mostly her tears were borne of guilt and sympathy, she reflected. Kouga was far from perfect, but he didn’t deserve to have his heart broken. She had taken enough damage to her own heart in the past to know what it felt like. Hopefully the wolf prince would heal in time, and would come to regard her as the friend she had always believed him to be.

Eventually her sobs wound down completely, and she lay limply in Inuyasha’s embrace, lulled by the gentle rise and fall of his chest. She did not expect him to speak, so when he did it took her a moment to comprehend his words.

"Why…why didn’t you tell Kouga what really happened that night?"

Kagome leaned back to look up at him, finding his gaze downcast and unreadable. She could understand his confusion, she supposed; from Inuyasha’s perspective, it must have seemed entirely possible for her to more or less continue the status quo with Kouga. All she would have needed to do is inform the wolf of the accidental nature of her pregnancy, thereby leaving her feelings completely out of the equation and opening the door for her to actually become his woman later. Instead, she had burned any romantic bridges which could ever potentially exist between them. To a hanyou unused to being chosen by anyone, it must have seemed a bold and reckless move. But ultimately, it came down to not letting anyone think for a second that she was only with Inuyasha because he had knocked her up. That was her choice, long before she became pregnant.

"He didn’t need to know," she answered simply. This was true, and Inuyasha seemed to accept it. He nodded and took to gazing contemplatively over the horizon. Kagome settled down in his embrace once more, intent on enjoying every moment she could spend in his arms.

"Thank you."

His soft words caused her breath to catch. He wasn’t looking at her, but she could see how much her discretion in front of Kouga meant to him. Or maybe it was the simple fact that she would tell a rival male without hesitation that she had chosen him.

"Y-you’re welcome," Kagome stuttered, her cheeks heating for some reason. The solution was to duck her head and snuggle just a little closer to his chest. Inuyasha didn’t seem to mind in the slightest.

"Sango," Miroku whispered in the taijiya’s ear, sidling up to her. "I believe they have forgotten that we are here."

"Shh! If you bother them again, Inuyasha will give you another lump on your h—ack!"

A resounding slap rang out, followed by the sound of irritated footfalls and a helpless masculine chuckle. None of which bothered the hanyou and miko currently sitting together a few meters away.

"Dumbasses," Inuyasha snorted, more amused than annoyed.

Kagome giggled. "Sango-chan should know better than to ever let her guard down."

"Damn bouzu. We got rid of one letch, but he’s still here."

"Kouga-kun isn’t a letch. Although…I guess you don’t have to worry about him saying I’m ‘his woman’ anymore, ne?" she teased.

"Keh! I never worried about that."

Kagome laughed; he almost sounded completely serious. She might point out that Inuyasha got jealous _every_ time Kouga came around. But why would she, when his embrace was so soothing and the sunset so beautiful?

They stayed like that, gazing together out to the western horizon, until the last sliver of the setting sun sank below the tree line.

* * *

"Oh, quit pouting already, Inuyasha. So you got tricked by some monkey kids. It’s not a big deal."

"Little bastards," the hanyou muttered, continuing to stalk forward with an annoyed scowl contorting his features.

Kagome sighed, disappointed but not surprised that he couldn’t quite let this go yet. Ultimately, no harm had been done by the monkeys’ deception, other than the couple ‘osuwari’ he’d had to endure for threatening the village. But Inuyasha _hated_ being made a fool of, even if was just by a few impish children. Even reminding him that they’d gotten a good lead from Sarugami-sama wouldn’t alleviate his bad mood, she knew. He would just have to cool off on his own. _A great evil passing over the village in the direction of Ushitora, then vanishing without a trace…it has to be Naraku. But what enemies will we face as we get closer to discovering his hiding place?_

"Don’t be mad at them, Inuyasha," Shippou told him with mild indignation. "Little youkai have to be good at tricking bigger youkai in order to survive."

For a moment, Kagome thought an argument was about to break out, but Inuyasha just snorted, apparently not in the mood for conversation either. Though he did turn to her and bark out a brusque command.

"Wench, you just make sure our kid never pulls any shit like that."

Kagome rolled her eyes. He probably wanted her to tell him that their child would be the most well-behaved offspring in the history of reproduction. Yes, and while they were being completely delusional, he could promise her that her delivery would be quick and painless.

"Kids are mischievous, Inuyasha," she told him sagely. "When it’s your own, you won’t mind so much."

"Keh," he snorted, but he didn’t argue with her. Instead he briefly got a far-away look in his eyes, which seemed to take the edge off his sour mood. Seeing this, Kagome dared to sidle up to walk beside him, so they were almost touching but not quite. He glanced at her but made no attempt to move away.

Kagome grinned softly to herself. Since Kouga’s appearance, Inuyasha had stopped imposing so much distance between them. She hadn’t held his hand or hugged him or anything like that, but he didn’t seem to mind walking with her now. What had done it, she wondered? Her willingness to present them as a happy couple to Kouga, or simply time removed from that afternoon in her bedroom?

Whatever the reason, she was happy with the decisions she had made with regards to Kouga. Inuyasha had been grateful, and even the wolf prince would be better off. Yes, he was hurting now, but in the long run he would benefit from no longer entertaining romantic thoughts about her, thoughts which would never be reciprocated.

Still though, she wondered which encounter would be less pleasant: the next time they met Kouga or the next time they ran into Kikyou.

* * *

Two days later, not much had changed. They were still heading northeast; a forested mountain had come into view in the distance, so they were making for it. There were no other visible landmarks to speak of, and even from afar the mountain seemed unusual somehow.

Their route brought them close to a small village, and they decided to take a slight detour to check for rumors of Naraku and possibly get a refreshing night of sleep indoors. They were nearly on the outskirts of the settlement when a gust of wind blew into their faces, and Inuyasha froze in his tracks, sniffing furiously.

"What is it, Inuyasha?" Kagome asked.

"You sense a jewel shard, Kagome?"

She focused her senses for a moment. "Yes, over there," she answered, pointing to the village.

"It’s the same scent as before," he declared with a smirk, cracking his knuckles. "A corpse and graveyard soil. We found another one of those damn zombies!"

Swiftly the Inu-gang prepared for battle. Sango donned her taijiya armour, and each human plus Shippou mounted their respective charges. Kagome felt a thrill of exhilaration; it had been a long time since she’d rode into battle on Inuyasha’s back. She gripped her bow tightly and drew an arrow, taking a steadying breath and finding her reserves of spiritual energy deep within.

"You ready, Kagome?" he asked quietly.

She nodded firmly. "Let’s go, Inuyasha."

With a final fanged smirk, Inuyasha kicked himself into the air, Kirara following close behind. And woe to whatever enemy awaited them.


	11. The Mysterious Doctor

The Inu-gang’s entrance into the village caused quite an uproar. Children ran for their mothers, and men hurried to retrieve weapons or stood eyeing the strangers warily. Their suspicion was understandable; it was not every day that a hanyou carrying a young girl, and a neko-youkai bearing a monk and a taijiya charged into your village like they owned the place. Normally, the Inu-gang would move into a settlement slowly on foot so as to reduce the disturbance, but the warmness of their welcome was the least of their concerns at the moment.

Inuyasha moved swiftly and efficiently, tracking the scent of corpse and graveyard soil without even needing to put Kagome down. The miko focused her senses and was able to confirm that they were indeed heading in the right direction. There was something odd about the rapidly approaching light of the Shikon no Tama, but she couldn’t quite put her finger on it. And she had precious little time to reflect. Within a minute or two of first entering the village, Inuyasha led them to a medium-sized hut near the opposite end, from which apparently emanated both the foul stench and the jewel’s aura. He set Kagome down and stood in front of her, hand gripping Tetsusaiga’s hilt and every nerve primed.

"Whoever’s in there, get your ass out here!" he demanded. There was the sound of shuffling inside, and the reed mat covering the entryway rustled. Inuyasha liked to think he was ready for anything at this point, but nothing could have prepared him for what actually emerged from the hut.

It was a little girl, no more than five or six years old. She stared at Inuyasha with big, frightened eyes, stumbling to her hands and knees in the dirt outside the hut. Both palms and one knee came away with scrapes, and she sat back with her bottom lip trembling, continuing to stare at Inuyasha as if he was the single scariest thing she had ever seen. The hanyou found himself at a loss.

"Aya?" came a gentle masculine voice from inside the hut, the owner emerging a moment later. He knelt down and picked the girl up, studying her injuries. "Had a fall there, little one? Go back inside and I’ll clean those up for you." Then he set the girl back on her feet and gave her a gentle nudge toward the doorway.

"Now," he said brightly, standing to face the Inu-gang. "How can I help you fol—ack!"

In the blink of an eye, Inuyasha had the man pinned against the wall of the hut, a clawed hand around his throat. The hanyou heard gasps and cries of outrage from the handful of onlookers who had followed them, but he paid them no mind. His full attention was on the quivering man-shaped mass before him, the one who positively _reeked_ of death.

"Inuyasha!" Kagome whispered urgently, in that special pre-osuwari tone of hers. "What are you doing?!"

"Well," he demanded irritably, "this is the guy with the shard, isn’t it?" Her silence told him everything he needed to know.

"Any last words?" he asked the man, hoping to see some sort of anger or defiance in his eyes. Instead, he glimpsed only terror.

"Wait, Inuyasha!" Kagome ordered, moving forward to place a restraining hand on his shoulder.

"Why?" he snarled, turning his head to glare at her.

It was a good question, Kagome reflected. Stopping Inuyasha had been a knee-jerk reaction, but as she thought about it her reasons became clear. And she finally understood why the jewel shard in this man’s possession had seemed odd to her before. It was pure. Whereas the shard possessed by the other creature they had encountered had been corrupted, this one contained no darkness at all. The man’s behavior, his seemingly kind nature, could be faked, but the purity of the shard could not. That was why she had to stop Inuyasha from killing him, at least for now. Because however mysterious this man might be, his kindness to the child was not an act, nor was he pretending to be ready to piss himself under Inuyasha’s claws. He was what he appeared to be. Kagome could think of no other explanation for the purity of the shard.

"Let him go, Inuyasha," she told him firmly. The hanyou narrowed his eyes, stepping toward her so their noses were practically touching, though he still kept his victim pinned against the wall with his right hand. Kagome met his irate gaze unflinchingly.

"Have you lost your mind, wench? This guy is fucking _dead._ "

"And his shard is pure."

That seemed to surprise Inuyasha, and he backed off a few centimeters. But then he recovered and was right back in her face.

"It doesn’t matter. He has a shard and he smells just like that other bastard. That means he’s working for Naraku," he ground out, enunciating every word as though she was barely intelligent enough to understand them.

"It _does_ matter," she growled, hands fisting at her sides as she fought against her own rising ire. "It means he’s not faking. We can’t kill an innocent man!"

"You’re a moron if you think he’s innocent! He’s one of Naraku’s lackeys. Now tell me where the fucking shard is!"

"I won’t!"

"Stupid bitch!" Inuyasha swore, turning back to his helpless quarry with claws raised. He clearly intended to slash the man into a hundred pieces and collect the shard without her help.

"Osuwari!"

*Thud*

Sometimes Kagome hated having to subdue Inuyasha, but not this time. Part of her wanted to deliver a few firm kicks to her stubborn hanyou’s head as he lay there cussing her out. She had been somewhat concerned that he would drag the ‘dead’ man down with him, but that didn’t happen. Instead, the hapless fool tripped over himself trying to make a run for it, then began shuffling away on his backside.

"P-p-please!" he called at her, pleading shamelessly. "I’m only a doctor!"

"Don’t you fucking go anywhere!" Inuyasha growled viciously, paralyzing the man with fear. The hanyou fought against the spell, until finally it wore off and he was able to lurch to his feet. When he turned to face her, Kagome felt a twinge of fear herself, despite her anger. She had never seen Inuyasha so furious before. He glared at her, his eyes hard, as if he wasn’t sure whether she was ally or enemy.

"Bitch," he snarled, in a low tone which sent a shiver down her spine. "What the fuck is wrong with you?"

Kagome suddenly didn’t want to argue anymore. Even now, she was not afraid that Inuyasha would hurt her. But backing down was easier than seeing him like this, confronting him when he so strongly adhered to the opposite opinion. She could see little droplets of blood dripping from his clenched fists, from where his claws had punctured his palms. Suddenly she questioned whether this man, this total stranger was worth all the trouble of trying to save his sorry behind. But it didn’t matter. She couldn’t take the easy way out. Because no matter what Inuyasha said or did, she couldn’t live with herself if she condoned the execution of an innocent man. And until it was proven otherwise, this self-proclaimed doctor was innocent. The presence of the jewel shard and the scent of death were immaterial.

Though she was firm in her resolve, Kagome was nevertheless extremely grateful when she was saved from responding by an unexpected exclamation.

"You lot, leave Suikotsu-sama alone!"

This was followed by many similar cries; unbeknownst to hanyou or miko, an angry mob had formed during their argument. The villagers had turned out in force to protect one of their own, most wielding sticks or farming implements as weapons, though some bore old swords. As a group, they appeared an edgy and undisciplined forced, prone to rout. But they drew courage from their numbers—well over three dozen men of all ages—and their leaders. One such man stood at the head of the group, apart from the rest. He was middle-aged, with a pockmarked face and a fearsome scar running vertically from his jawline up through his ruined left eye. Notably, he wore no eye patch, and his left arm had also been amputated just above the elbow. In his right hand he carried the best-looking sword in the village. The blade had seen some battle, but appeared sharp and well-cared for.

None of which seemed to impress Inuyasha.

"Get the fuck out of here, all of you!" he barked, his tone indicating exactly what he thought of the ragtag group of humans who dared to challenge him.

"Leave this village and do not return!" the disfigured leader shot back. "We will not let you harm Suikotsu-sama!" He raised his sword in the air, and a cheer went up behind him.

Inuyasha took several steps toward the mass of humans, cracking his knuckles and baring his fangs. Some of the men began to lose their nerve at this, but the majority remained defiant. Seeing that his unspoken threats were not working, Inuyasha tried something more direct.

"You think I’m scared of you weaklings? I’ll raze this whole fucking village to the ground!"

"Osuwari."

*Thud*

With Inuyasha once more reduced to a madly swearing, hanyou-shaped lump on the ground, Kagome stepped up to address the villagers. It was time to end this.

"I apologize for him," she declared, bowing to the leader. "We will leave now."

"The hell we will!" Inuyasha snapped, glaring up at her and fighting the spell with everything he had.

"Osuwari!" she cried, with a little more force this time. Inuyasha did not fall silent, but he did stop struggling. Kagome knelt by his side, but did not move to comfort him. Now was not the time; she had to get her message through that thick skull of his first.

"Inuyasha," she said quietly, her fierce tone demanding his undivided attention. "I said we would leave. I _didn’t_ say we would go far. I know we can’t just let this guy run away with a jewel shard. But we need to talk about this, see what our friends think, and come up with a plan. If we stay here, someone’s going to end up getting killed. Maybe even one of us."

She didn’t really believe that; her friends were all excellent fighters, and Inuyasha was fiercely protective of her. Even Miroku and Sango could probably make short work of this rabble mob. But doing it without employing lethal force would be a much greater challenge. And these villagers were just as innocent as the man they were trying to protect. From their perspective, it must seem that some violent outsiders were threatening one of their own without provocation. And because the conflict had progressed nearly to the point of physical combat, they wouldn’t listen to a word any of the outsiders said about the doctor’s smell or the shard of the Shikon no Tama embedded in his neck. The only option left open to the Inu-gang which would avoid violence was to make a strategic withdrawal and regroup.

Inuyasha didn’t say a word as he rose to his feet, nor did he look at her. But she could tell that his primary concerns had been placated. The argument was far from over, and the sniveling worm of a doctor was not going to be allowed to escape.

"Oi," he called, voice dripping with malice as he eyed the doctor cruelly. "If you set one foot outside this village, I’m going to hunt you down and butcher you like a fucking rabbit."

The doctor curled into a ball and began weeping uncontrollably. Inuyasha snorted in disgust, then stormed off in the direction of the nearby forest. Any villagers hiding along his path gave him a wide berth, and no member of the Inu-gang was harassed as they departed. Kagome paused at the tree line, looking back to see men already helping the doctor to his feet, women and children emerging from their hiding places and see if he was okay. _They really do love him,_ she reflected with a sigh. _What are we going to do now?_

They walked for another minute or two, moving deeper into the forest so as to be out of sight of the village. But she knew Inuyasha would stop before they went too far, and sure enough, she found him in a small clearing, waiting for her with arms crossed over his chest and a foot tapping impatiently. Kagome crossed her arms as well and adopted a matching frown, the adrenaline of confrontation giving way to irritation at _his_ irritation.

"Took you long enough, wench," he snapped petulantly.

Kagome rolled her eyes. Count on Inuyasha to completely ignore the fact that the rest of their group had stayed with her and traveled at her pace, or that he’d had to wait thirty seconds for her at most. It wasn’t important enough to bring up. She just wanted to get to the point so they could get this over with.

"Well, maybe if you had taken the time to look back, you would have seen how much those villagers care for the doctor."

"Keh. I don’t give a shit. He still needs to die."

"Inuyasha, how many times do I have to tell you? He’s _innocent._ The jewel shard in his neck is pure!"

"How many times do I have to tell _you?_ He’s fucking _dead._ He’s only tied to this world by the shard. Do you think Naraku’s gonna let him live? If we kill him now then at least the shard doesn’t get used for that bastard’s sick plans."

"I’m glad you used the world ‘kill,’ since if you pull that shard out, that’s exactly what you’ll be doing. You’ll be a murderer, and I’ll be an accessory to it."

"What the fuck is an access—never mind, it don’t fucking matter. And it wouldn’t be murder, ‘cause he’s fucking _dead_ already!"

"Oh, and would you say the same about Kikyou?!"

As soon as those words passed her lips, Kagome regretted them. Inuyasha flinched as if struck, and she knew that she had made this far too personal, for both of them. But before she could attempt to retract her statement, the hanyou glared at her with real hostility in his eyes.

"That’s different," he snarled. "Kikyou’s life isn’t tied to a fucking jewel shard, and you damn well know it!"

"No, but Kohaku’s is."

That quiet declaration brought the argument to a grinding halt. Inuyasha and Kagome turned toward the source of the voice, to find Sango seated on a convenient log, staring at the ground with a despondent expression.

"S-Sango," Inuyasha stuttered, "I wasn’t talking about Kohaku."

"Weren’t you, though?" the taijiya asked, gazing at him with vacant, haunted eyes. "Kohaku’s life is also bound to a jewel shard. For all intents and purposes, he is dead too. And he’s probably done far worse in his borrowed life than that doctor has. So if you’re condemning the doctor as deserving of death, then you’re condemning Kohaku too."

Inuyasha opened his mouth to respond, but ultimately could find nothing to say and shut it again with a muttered ‘keh.’ Kagome felt a grim sort of satisfaction at how uncomfortable he looked, but also sympathy. She knew what he was thinking, that the difference between Kohaku and the doctor was that Kohaku was Sango’s brother. Because of that relationship, they were willing to go the extra mile to try to save Kohaku instead of killing him, a fact which Naraku had used against them on several previous occasions. But this reason for the vastly different treatment must have sounded lame to even Inuyasha’s ears. Innocent men should be treated the same, regardless of who was related to whom. Perhaps Inuyasha was starting to see that now.

Or perhaps not. He certainly didn’t look ready to concede. Kagome sensed that round three of the argument was about to start. This time, however, she would avoid bringing Kikyou up. She didn’t want to hurt Inuyasha; she just wanted to convince him that he was wrong. Fortunately, the member of the group who considered himself the most level-headed chose that moment to speak up for the first time.

"It appears we have reached an impasse," Miroku observed. "For my part, I agree with Inuyasha in the pragmatic sense. But my conscience is with Kagome. I do not believe continuing this right now will be productive. Let’s make camp and sleep on it. I don’t think the doctor will be going anywhere in the meantime."

One by one, the other members of the Inu-gang nodded their agreement. It was too early to make dinner; Inuyasha wouldn’t want to hunt in case something happened at the village, and modern food didn’t take long to prepare. There was about an hour of good sunlight left, so Kagome decided to take advantage of it and do some studying. She quickly found it to be futile; there was too much on her mind to focus on schoolwork. She nevertheless tried gamely at it for a good fifteen or twenty minutes before giving up. She glanced around camp to see what the others were doing. Miroku and Sango had finished setting up the fire and were now sitting together and talking quietly. The taijiya seemed to be keeping a close watch on the monk’s wayward hands. Shippou and Kirara were playing together in the surrounding woods, and Inuyasha…

Kagome’s eyes softened. Inuyasha was sitting by himself with his back against a tree, arms and legs crossed, staring solemnly into the flames. He seemed so lonely, that she found herself moving to him automatically. She knew his earlier anger could resurface at any moment, but she decided it was worth the risk.

He didn’t notice her approach until she sat down beside him. Then he leaned back and stared, as if he couldn’t believe she was really there. Kagome smiled gently at him, hoping to convey how much she loved being here by his side, despite their argument. Inuyasha frowned and looked away, but crucially he straightened his back so their bodies were almost touching again. The pair settled into companionable silence, and Kagome for one was simply grateful that they could sit together without being at each other’s throats.

"Is…the baby okay?"

His soft-spoken question caught her by surprise. He seemed guilty, but she couldn’t figure out why.

"Why wouldn’t it be?"

  
"Kaede-babaa said that too much stress can be bad for the baby," he admitted shamefully. "And for you."

"Oh," Kagome breathed, the pieces finally coming together. "Inuyasha, a little fight isn’t going to hurt the baby. He was a bit distressed before, but now he’s calm again."

"He?" the hanyou repeated, gazing at her with an unreadable expression.

Kagome shrugged. "I can sense his aura." This was an ability she had discovered a few days ago. She could not communicate with the child or examine him in any detail, but it was enough to get a general idea of how he was feeling at any given time.

"His aura feels like a ‘he’ to me. I can’t explain it."

Inuyasha nodded, digesting that information in silence. "A son," he mumbled a few moments later.

"Is…that okay?"

"Keh. I just want a healthy kid. I don’t care if it’s a boy or girl."

Kagome grinned. "It’s okay to have a preference, Inuyasha. I hope it’s a boy who looks just like his handsome father."

Inuyasha snorted and looked away to hide his blush. He probably had a few things to say about her opinion of him as handsome, but knew that she would scold him if he tried to self-deprecate. She liked him for who he was, hanyou ears and all. It was something which would never cease to amaze him. Perhaps more amazing was how she was willing to spend time with him after he had been such a jackass to her this afternoon.

"Tomorrow," he mumbled, "we’ll talk…no yelling."

Kagome found him gazing at her, remorse and absolution shining in his golden eyes. Matching emotions shone back at him from her own dark orbs. They both had something to be sorry for, and were both forgiven. And tomorrow, when it came time to resume the debate, they would approach the matter with level heads and open minds.

"Deal."

The comfortable silence resumed, and Kagome found her eyelids drooping with fatigue. Figuring he wouldn’t mind, she dared to lean her head on Inuyasha’s shoulder. The hanyou stiffened briefly at the contact but made no move to dislodge her. It probably helped that Miroku and Sango pretended not to notice, bless them. Kagome was just nodding off to a nice power nap before dinner when Inuyasha shook her urgently.

"Wake up, wench," he ordered, rising swiftly to his feet as soon as she raised her head. Kagome didn’t like the grave expression on his face, or the way his ears swiveled like little radar dishes in the direction of the village.

"The village is under attack," he declared. The Inu-gang were still fully prepared for combat from earlier, so within ten seconds they were on their way back to the stricken settlement.

It was a horrific scene. At least twenty men lay dead, sliced into dozens of separate pieces. Blood spattered all over the ground and the walls of huts near the killing zone. The rest of the villagers were fleeing in terror, their screams resounding through the late afternoon air. Inuyasha knew what had happened; the villagers had rallied to defend themselves again, but this time the enemy had massacred them without mercy. And it appeared that the culprit was one man. He stood surveying the carnage with a gleeful grin twisting his features. Despite this, the deep blue teardrop markings under his eyes and the intentionally wild way his hair was kept made him seem very feminine. The rest of his body added to that impression, clad in a light purple yukata with green floral print, which was worn so that it revealed a disturbing amount of leg.

As he approached, Inuyasha caught some of the stranger’s conversation with the doctor Suikotsu, who was lying curled up on his side, covered in the blood of his former neighbors and shaking uncontrollably.

"So wake the hell up already, Suikotsu! I hear the people I’m supposed to fight are finally in the area, and I’d much rather meet them than be stuck babysitting you."

Inuyasha set Kagome down a safe distance from the battlefield, Kirara landing beside them. "Does that guy have a jewel shard, Kagome?"

"Yes, in his neck."

Inuyasha nodded, not surprised. He could smell the distinctive scent of graveyard soil from here, and he didn’t think it came solely from Suikotsu. One thing was for sure—no one would object to him wasting this guy, even if he wasn’t a reanimated corpse.

"Stay back," he ordered, stalking calmly toward the enemy. He hadn’t gone two steps before the stranger noticed him. His eyes lit up with genuine excitement, and if Inuyasha hadn’t been creeped out before, he definitely was now.

"Oh! Could it be that you’re Inuyasha?"

"What the— How do you know me, bastard?!"

"Oh, you _are_ Inuyasha!" he exclaimed, holding his hands to his chest like a love-struck teenager. "You’re even cuter than I dreamed!"

Inuyasha was suddenly gripped by the very powerful urge to vomit, but settled for a low growl of annoyance.

"Cut the crap! I just have one question before I slaughter you. Where’s Naraku?"

"And those ears!" the stranger cooed, completely ignoring the hanyou’s question. "They’re _adorable!_ I think I’ll take them."

Inuyasha felt his thin thread of patience snap, and he would have charged headlong into the fight if Miroku had not restrained him with a firm hand on his shoulder.

"Hold up, Inuyasha," he said. "Let me try. You there! Where did you get that jewel shard? Are you working for Naraku?"

The stranger just stared at him, and Miroku suddenly felt a thousand invisible insects crawling over his skin. Is this how it felt to be ogled?

"The houshi is sexy too!" the stranger declared happily. "I’d love to see his agonized face!"

It took all of Miroku’s control not to go after the perverted bastard himself. But he had a feeling that Inuyasha would need to handle this one. The hanyou was chomping at the bit anyway.

"I wish I could just suck him up," he observed, beyond disappointed that Inuyasha would get the satisfaction of wiping that ridiculously adoring expression off their enemy’s face.

"Oooh, the houshi is so forward!" the stranger shouted scandalously. "Already wanting to do naughty things to me. You can suck me up anytime, houshi-kun!"

Miroku closed his eyes and tried to go to a happy place, but all he could see were horrible, unspeakable images. What he wouldn’t give for a stiff drink and a couple willing girls to prove his manhood with right about now.

"Oi, bouzu," Inuyasha called, freeing Miroku from his mental torture.

"Y-yes?"

"I’m gonna kill this bastard, and then we’re never going to speak of this again. Agreed?"

"Agreed."

With that, Inuyasha whipped out Tetsusaiga and held it menacingly in front of him.

"All right, you bastard! Prepare yourself!"

"Oooh, that’s a nice sword you’ve got there," the stranger observed, voice dripping with insinuation. "I wonder which is better, yours or mine? Let’s find out!"

Inuyasha had intended to blow his opponent away with a Kaze no Kizu, but the cutting edge of a sword blade came out of nowhere. It was all he could do to block it with Tetsusaiga.

"It’s a concealed sword!" he heard Miroku shout. "Everybody back!"

Inuyasha barely had time to contemplate the meaning of the monk’s words before the mysterious, serpent-like weapon was on him again. This time it seemed to fold over itself one more time when he blocked it, catching him in the back of the shoulder. He cried out, more in shock than pain, and freed himself with a shove from Tetsusaiga. The wound was superficial, thanks to his fire-rat, but would he be so lucky next time? The strange sword had already retracted to its owner, appearing as a single curved blade again.

"You’ve already lost some of your confidence, Inuyasha," he observed. "I like it. Sink further into despair!"

The sword came on again. Inuyasha parried the blade in a manner which would have defeated the first two strikes, but at the last instant the sword suddenly changed direction. Only lightning reflexes saved his life and limited the damage to a raking graze across his forearm.

The enemy cackled gleefully. "Feel the bite of the Shichinintai’s attack captain, Jakotsu-sama’s Jakotsutou!"

Tired of defending, Inuyasha smashed the next strike away with Tetsusaiga, but the blade recoiled and caught him on the thigh. The following attack he simply dodged, and nearly lost his head for his trouble. It was extremely difficult to either dodge or defend when you couldn’t tell where the blade was coming from. Inuyasha cursed, but forced himself to keep moving.

This pattern continued for several minutes, with Jakotsu sending an unceasing frenzy of attacks at Inuyasha, who dodged or parried every single one. Not all cleanly; several strikes snuck past his defenses and left him with cuts all over his body, all of them relatively minor at this point. Still, he was amazed at the stamina of this human, who hadn’t even given him a moment to breathe, let alone launch one of Tetsusaiga’s stronger attacks.

Hiraikotsu soared in, catching Jakotsutou on its way to him and fouling up the blade. But its owner barely missed a beat, using the sword to hurl the boomerang back at Sango with an enraged shriek. Inuyasha heard her cry out, but couldn’t afford to look to make sure she was all right. Sango had afforded him this one opportunity, and he couldn’t miss it. He raised Tetsusaiga over his head to launch the Kaze no Kizu.

But Jakotsu was faster. Inuyasha was forced to block the serpentine sword once more, as it forced him back. His arms, heavy with fatigue, caved in just slightly under the pressure and earned him a neat slash along his cheek. This time when Jakotsu retracted his sword, he held it back. Inuyasha, exhausted and disheartened, simply stood with Tetsusaiga raised, breathing heavily.

"That expression is wonderful, Inuyasha," Jakotsu declared, a crazed light in his eyes. "Show me more! Show me—ack!"

Jakotsu barely managed to block the arrow which came flying straight for his chest. Inuyasha hoped Kagome’s purifying arrow would have some effect on the sword, but Jakotsu swatted it aside like it was nothing. He knew why; as formidable as Jakotsutou was, it was not a youkai sword. Logically, spiritual energy would be useless against it, and the arrow itself wasn’t strong enough to even make a scratch. But Jakotsu didn’t seem to care about that; he turned and regarded Kagome with a hateful glare. Inuyasha hurried to put himself between the enemy and his friends.

"Your fight is with me, Jakotsu. Leave them out of this."

"Then tell them to _stay_ out of it!" Jakotsu snarled, renewing his attacks. Inuyasha was satisfied that he had his opponent’s undivided attention once more. His friends were strong, but none of them could handle this type of opponent, whose strikes were so quick and unpredictable. The battle resumed in much the same manner as before, and Inuyasha began to wonder if he should try something risky to end it. But gradually things began to change. At first Inuyasha thought Jakotsu was finally tiring, or that he was getting better at reading the sword’s movements. Neither of those seemed right; the strikes were as vicious and unpredictable as ever. They were simply less accurate, a defect which seemed to grow worse over time. It was not until Inuyasha noticed his opponent squinting that he comprehended the reason.

The sun. It was setting, partially below the horizon already, the sky darkening rapidly above them. And Jakotsu was human. Inuyasha hadn’t noticed the waning daylight at first because he could see fine in the dark, but humans didn’t have any night vision to speak of. Feeling a rush of confidence, he smacked away a particularly clumsy attack and leaned Tetsusaiga on his shoulder. Jakotsu, taken aback by his prey’s sudden cocky attitude, did not follow up immediately.

"Heh, having trouble seeing, Jakotsu?" Inuyasha taunted. "Just a human after all, eh?"

 

Jakotsu’s eyes widened, and he stared at the western horizon in disbelief. It was as if he’d been so focused on the battle, and the faces his opponent made, that he hadn’t realized why his eyesight was failing him. _Tch, not an especially bright one, this guy._ But he understood the peril he was in now; for the first time, there was real fear in his eyes. Inuyasha smirked. He was going to enjoy this.

The sound of terrified screams drew his attention to the right, where a few villagers who’d stuck around to see what happened were now fleeing in terror from something. He saw one woman stumble in her panic. She made it halfway to her feet again before the wave of smoke rolled over her, choking off her agonized shriek and dissolving her flesh even as her heart still beat within her chest.

"Bye-bye, Inuyasha!" Jakotsu called, already retreating as quickly as he could, an unconscious Suikotsu slung over his shoulder. "Next time, we’ll have to meet earlier in the day!"

"You’re not getting away, you bast—aargh!"

Then his feet were burning, and he leapt back to safe ground out of reflex. Looking out over the rapidly expanding area covered by the noxious smoke, Inuyasha was presented with a decision. He could go after Jakotsu; the human could never hope to outrun him, even if he had to go around the smoke. But that would mean leaving his friends alone, in the dark, with whoever had deployed that smoke in the first place.

"Fuck!" he swore, turning and sprinting back to his companions. He picked Kagome up bridal style and carried her out of the danger zone, waiting just long enough for the rest of them to mount Kirara. He led them back to their former campsite, where they packed up their things and moved to a new location deeper in the forest, ten minutes further as the neko flies. Only then did he begin to try to calm his racing blood.

Kagome’s first order of business was, of course, to check on their injuries. Sango had suffered a shallow cut on her forearm from when hiraikotsu had been thrown back at her. Kagome bandaged it as a precaution against infection. She found Inuyasha a less cooperative patient, as the surly hanyou seemed perfectly willing to take out his frustration at Jakotsu’s escape on her. A threatened osuwari fixed that, at least enough to get him to reluctantly remove his shirts so she could check his wounds. The one in his shoulder was the worst, but none require more than cleaning and light bandaging thanks to his youkai blood. Inuyasha knew he’d gotten lucky; Jakotsu had probably been toying with him a little in the very beginning. That was what irked him so much about letting the bastard get away; now he was likely going to have to face that damn sword again, in broad daylight. And he had a feeling that there would be no playing around next time.

As sour as his mood was, it surprised no one that he didn’t say much during the group’s customary post-battle discussion. Jakotsu had referred to himself as the attack captain of the Shichinintai, or ‘seven-man band.’ Given his possession of a shard of the Shikon no Tama, it was safe to assume that the zombie they had killed previously was also a member of this group. That meant there were probably five additional members roaming about, including Suikotsu and whoever had deployed that cloud of poison. Jakotsu had completely ignored their questions concerning Naraku, but no one doubted that the Shichinintai were working for him. Quite simply, they could not have obtained the jewel shards from anyone else, not to mention the fact that a Saimyoushou had made off with the shard from the Shichinintai member defeated several weeks ago.

But this new information also brought new questions. Chief among them was an explanation for Suikotsu’s strange behavior. No one disputed that he was a member of the Shichinintai. Inuyasha made one smarmy, ‘I told you so’ type of comment, but saw Kagome flinch guiltily and quickly decided to shut up. Suikotsu’s association with the Shichinintai did not, however, explain why he had been reduced to whimpering ball of flesh on the ground. Then Kagome informed them that she had noticed the shard in his neck repeatedly fluctuating between pure and polluted, as Suikotsu lay there holding his head and staring at the bodies of his neighbors. Finally, he had passed out during the battle with the shard mostly pure, and it had remained that way even as Jakotsu carried him off afterwards. The final piece of the puzzle was put into place when Inuyasha recalled the words he had overheard from Jakotsu, telling Suikotsu to ‘wake up.’

It was Sango who first raised the possibility of a man possessing ‘two minds within one body.’ Kagome confirmed that this was possible; in the modern era, they called it multiple personality disorder. It was the only theory that made any sense. Suikotsu’s ‘good side’ had been in control today, and during the battle his ‘evil side’ had tried to emerge, corrupting the shard in the process but ultimately failing to take over. This would explain why the shard had been pure in the first place, and how the doctor had managed to convince an entire village that he was a good man. As Kagome had stated when they first met him, it wasn’t an act. Suikotsu really was a gentle soul, at least while his benevolent personality was in control. Kagome for one hoped that they would never meet Suikotsu’s other personality, but had a feeling that this prayer would go unanswered.

Dinner was a subdued affair, as each member of the Inu-gang contemplated the road ahead of them. If the four members of the Shichinintai whom they had not yet met were as strong as Jakotsu, getting past them and finding Naraku was going to be a real challenge. Only a couple months ago, the dark hanyou had been so close. If Sesshoumaru had not interfered, Inuyasha thought he might have killed Naraku with one more attack from Tetsusaiga that day. Now he had hidden himself and marshaled new minions for his protection, potentially more powerful than any of his incarnations. It seemed a daunting task, and a poor start achieved on this day.

Normally, Kagome might have attempted to lighten the mood, but tonight she remained quiet and withdrawn. Inuyasha eyed her warily from across camp. Oh, she hid it well, but from the benefit of scent or perhaps from knowing her so well, he could tell that she was feeling remorseful about something. So he was not surprised that she found falling asleep difficult later, or that she rose from her sleeping bag with a miserable sigh a little before midnight. From his perch in the tree above, Inuyasha watched her trudge dejectedly out of camp. Rolling his eyes, he leapt down and followed. He found her barely a dozen meters from the fire, sitting on a partially collapsed tree and gazing up at the moon through a gap in the canopy.

"You shouldn’t be out here, wench," he snapped, harsher than he meant to.

She gazed at him over her shoulder, favoring him with a sad smile. "I knew you’d come," she said simply.

"Well, come back then. Or are you gonna make me stay out here all damn night?"

Again, Inuyasha cursed his incredible ability to speak before thinking. Kagome was hurting, and he was making it worse. Perhaps he was subconsciously trying to get a rise out of her, even if it was borne of anger. In this he failed; Kagome simply went back to staring at the moon.

"It’s up to you," she told him. "I won’t make you stay."

Okay, now Inuyasha knew something was seriously wrong. His heart thundered in his chest, and he tamped down on his rising panic. He was having flashbacks to that night in the tree, after Kikyou’s appearance, when Kagome had seemed empty inside, devoid of everything which made her _Kagome._ And like that night, he determined to do something about it.

Walking over and sitting next to her was not difficult. It was not even that hard to place his hand atop her own in an attempt at comfort, though he did blush at the contact. What he found truly challenging was actually looking at her and forming the words he wanted to say. Finally, he lapsed back into old habits out of frustration.

"What the hell is the matter with you, wench?"

She flinched at his tone, pulling her hand away. Without thinking, he snatched it out of the air and held it tightly in his own, unwilling to let her withdraw. And as he stared down at their joined hands, he realized that perhaps the key to communicating with Kagome was simply to act, and not overthink his words. So, swallowing nervously, he finally managed to say something with the level of kindness and respect she deserved.

"Kagome…tell me what’s bothering you."

She regarded him with surprise, having rarely heard him use such a pleading tone. But it did not have the desired effect, as her gloomy expression returned. She turned away and shook her head.

"Seriously, Kagome, tell me…please."

Even using that word didn’t help, Inuyasha found. Kagome bowed her head and closed her eyes, apparently intent on ignoring him. This obviously did not sit well with the hanyou, who decided to throw niceties out the window.

"Dammit, wench—"

"I killed them."

Inuyasha blinked at her, briefly unsure if he had heard her soft-spoken admission correctly. But his ears were sharp, and that intense remorse suddenly clouding her eyes would certainly comport with her words.

"Keh, that’s stupid. You didn’t kill anybody."

"I did. Not directly," she said, cutting off his protest. "You were right, Inuyasha. I should have let you kill Suikotsu. Instead, those villagers died trying to protect him. All of them died…because of me."

Inuyasha’s jaw dropped. Normally, he might feel quite ecstatic to hear Kagome tell him that he had been right about something, but he felt no joy now. Frustration and more than a little awe, yes, but no joy. How could anyone in Kagome’s shoes blame themselves for the deaths of those villagers? _Because she’s Kagome._ That was a simple answer, but it was all the explanation required. _I should have known._

Growling in irritation, he took Kagome’s hand and held it up in front of her face.

"This hand don’t have any blood on it, Kagome," he declared, shaking it a little for emphasis. "You wanna see a hand with blood on it? Look at this one!" His own larger hand moved in front of hers, deadly claws glinting in the moonlight.

"That was different," she retorted immediately, a bit of fire in her eyes. Inuyasha was glad to see it, even though it was only because his condemnations were directed inwardly. He supposed he would always carry some guilt with him for his actions on that day, but Kagome had helped him forgive himself and move on. Now he had to do the same for her.

"Keh. ‘Course it was different. I _actually_ killed those bandits. You didn’t fucking do _anything_ today."

"I did. If I hadn’t made you spare Suikotsu, maybe Jakotsu wouldn’t have killed those people."

"Yeah, and if I hadn’t been such a jackass, maybe we could’ve gotten Suikotsu to come with us willingly."

Her retort died on her lips; she had obviously never expected him to give such a negative assessment of his behavior. But he had spent a good deal of time this evening considering the events of the day, and in the heat of the moment his conscience had shone through. Sometimes speaking before thinking turned out for the best.

"T-that’s—"

"Bullshit?" he finished for her. "Hell yes it is. You think I feel responsible for those peoples’ deaths? I wish we had saved them, but they made their choice when they chased us out and tried to fight Jakotsu. It’s their own fault. Anyone who blames you or me is a moron."

Kagome frowned, clearly not in agreement. "But you told me not to let Suikotsu go! You were right about—"

"No, I wasn’t."

Kagome gaped at him, her jaw moving soundlessly until finally she gave up and waited for him to elaborate. Inuyasha sighed heavily.

"You were right, Kagome. I don’t care how it turned out. You were right to try to save Suikotsu." He paused, eyes glazing over with remembered past. "The way I grew up, I didn’t always have the highest regard for human life. I never went around killing people, but I didn’t give a shit about them either. There were times when people were in trouble and I could’ve helped them…but didn’t. I just _hated_ the world so much… Sometimes, like today, I go back to being like that. I…I rely on you, to help me remember not to be such a heartless bastard."

"You’re not heartless," she replied automatically.

"Today I was," he muttered sadly.

"It doesn’t matter. You’re a good person, Inuyasha. If someone needed help, you’d help them."

"Keh," he snorted dismissively, turning away from her. Why did receiving praise from her always quicken his pulse? Why did her absolute faith in his character make him feel so warm inside? Perhaps it was simply validation. He had tried to be a better person, a better man since meeting Kagome. Yes, he complained about helping random strangers, but he had never ignored a person in need since Kagome came into his life. She had changed him, just by being his friend. And in that moment, with Kagome still appearing torn between guilt and absolution, he was able to muster the courage to tell her.

"It’s because of you, you know," he mumbled, just loud enough so she could hear. "That I’m a better person."

"Inuyasha…"

He met her ardent gaze for a moment before looking away, allowing her to see the sincerity in his eyes. Silence settled over the pair for several long minutes. Kagome’s scent was still muddled by remorse, but gradually it cleared. Inuyasha didn’t realize their hands were still joined until she gave him a gentle squeeze. It was odd, how natural it felt to hold her in such a manner.

She was not beaming at him as he’d hoped, but she was smiling softly. And with genuine happiness, still tempered by traces of guilt. It would have been unreasonable to expect her to forgive herself completely in just a few minutes, but she was well on her way. Inuyasha grinned in relief. Everyone carried around little pieces of decisions gone bad. He knew he did; if he wasn’t careful, they could overwhelm him. But being with Kagome helped him move forward. She had rescued him from his past more than once, and now he hoped he could do the same for her.

These inspirational thoughts dispersed to the winds when Inuyasha saw Kagome’s tongue dart out and lick her lips. It was then that he noticed several other startling details: she had leaned closer to him, and her eyes were starting to periodically pan down to his lips before moving back up. A new fire kindled in her dark depths, threatening to consume both of them if only he would step into the flames.

It would have been so easy, to surrender to the passion burgeoning inside him, to take her in his arms and kiss her until she moaned for more. Especially after what she had said to Kouga. But he fought hard against the temptation, forcefully reminding himself that this was not fair to Kagome. She would give him everything, and he could offer her little in return. Nothing beyond a flimsy commitment and a veiled hope that he would be granted his freedom, to live his life as he wished. He had quickly seen that physically keeping his distance from her was foolish. She was far too perceptive, and would eventually have called him on it, exactly what he didn’t want. His restraint had to be subtle, reserved for moments like this, where giving into temptation would put him in so deep that he would be unable to pull back without severely wounding her. If he eventually had to join Kikyou in hell, he didn’t want to break Kagome in the process. That meant looking away from those beautiful eyes, keeping his hands from her silky skin, and his tongue from her sultry mouth. It meant following the will of his head, rather than that of his cock. Or his heart.

So he did. Afterward, he stood facing away from her, heaving shallow breaths through gritted teeth, less certain than ever that he was making the right choice. Her disappointed sigh nearly shattered his resolve; he had to literally bite his tongue to keep from spinning around and shoving it into her mouth. But he kept his composure by repeating the same mantra in his head over and over again—what was best for Kagome, what was fair to Kagome. So why did he still feel so uneasy, like he was missing something?

Kagome walked past him toward camp, and he hurried to catch up with her. He dared a sideways glace at her face, and was relieved to find her wearing a predominantly contented expression, though she still seemed disappointed.

"Goodnight, Inuyasha," she told him, her tone indicating that she wanted to ask a question, one he was not ready for. He grunted in response and leapt up to a very high branch in the tree, prepared to ignore her if necessary. Fortunately, Kagome let the matter go. And minutes later, when he glanced down to find her sleeping peacefully with that same contented smile on her face, he finally allowed himself to relax.

Not that he expected to get much sleep tonight. How could he sleep, when all he could think about was what might have been?

* * *

In the morning, they journeyed back to the village to check on the survivors. Since most of the buildings remained intact, the inhabitants had returned sometime during the night, after the smoke had cleared. Now they were setting about the grim task of collecting the remaining pieces of their dead and removing the bloodstains from the walls of the huts. They were, of course, still on high alert, though the welcome the Inu-gang received was not nearly as chilly as they expected. Men came running and weapons were raised, but were then lowered again as soon as the villagers recognized them. The disfigured man who had confronted them the day before strode up to them and bowed deeply.

"I fear we may have misjudged you," he said. "Please, accept my apologies. If there is anything you wish from us, please ask, and we will to our best to grant it. We owe you that much for saving what is left of our village from that monster."

"Just tell us whatever you know about him," Inuyasha replied, knowing that none of his friends would want to take anything from these people, not even a free meal. They would have enough trouble managing as it was, now minus about half of the adult male population.

The villager nodded. "Please follow me. I will tell you all I know." He led them to a small hut away from the battle zone, and once everyone was settled, began the tale.

"I am called Yuu. I do not know the name I was given at birth. I grew up an orphan, a servant to the local daimyo. As soon as I came of age, I joined the daimyo’s army. It was there that I first heard of the Shichinintai, a band of mercenaries who were quickly becoming infamous. Though only seven strong, it was said that they could perform the work of a hundred men or more, and possessed superhuman skill in battle. I must confess that I did not believe this talk…until the day came when the daimyos allied together to destroy the Shichinintai before they became too powerful to control.

"I fought at the battle where the Shichinintai were finally cornered and killed. It was slaughter; there is no other way to describe it. That monster, Jakotsu, slayed dozens of men by himself. There was also a Shichinintai member named Suikotsu, who fought with long metal claws and had markings on his face. It was those claws which took my eye and my arm, and gave me this scar," he said, pointing to the left side of his face. "But I was one of the lucky ones. I survived, and eventually came to live in this village. When Suikotsu the doctor first arrived here, I had my suspicions. There were rumors spreading that the Shichinintai had been resurrected. But the good doctor was so different from the man I fought all those years ago… I convinced myself that his name and the timing of his arrival were just coincidences. What a fool I was. To think that we have been harboring a member of the Shichinintai all this time…" He barked a dry laugh. "Now it seems that the rumors are true. The Shichinintai walk the earth once more. Another chance to indulge their lust for killing, and to have their revenge upon the daimyos who betrayed them."

The Inu-gang thanked Yuu for his information and departed shortly thereafter. It had been a stressful and sad twenty-four hours, but they felt much better now that they knew exactly what they were up against. Yuu had been able to give a general description of each member of the Shichinintai and his fighting style. Kyoukotsu was already dead, and the acrid smoke had likely been deployed by Mukotsu, the poison user. And as they pressed on toward Mount Hakurei, the site of the Shichinintai’s grave, they were confident that their next encounter with the band of mercenaries would not be long in coming. With every step, they drew closer to finding Naraku.

* * *

Jakotsu slid open the door of the hut and tossed Suikotsu in. The landing was less than graceful, and sounded like it would leave a few bruises. It served Suikotsu right for weeping so damn much, ever since he regained consciousness a little while ago. As far as Jakotsu was concerned, seeing a man cry was no fun unless he was _actively_ causing the tears. It had taken him all night to reach this place, the moon being bright enough to travel by at least. But the journey would prove well worth the effort. The sky was already starting to lighten; the other objects in the room were just becoming visible if one looked carefully. A fact which thus far had escaped Suikotsu’s notice.

"Please! I’m just a doctor," the pitiful man begged from his knees. That was Jakotsu’s favorite position for a victim to be in, but again, since he couldn’t entertain himself with Suikotsu, this was no fun at all.

"No, you’re Suikotsu of the Shichinintai. We left you alone for a while, hoping you would wake up on your own. But now our enemies are here, and Oo-aniki said to collect you. So I prepared this special place that’ll wake you up for sure," Jakotsu told him sadistically. "Look around."

It was then that Suikotsu noticed the sounds of this room. Soft groans, choking gasps, bitter weeping and lamentations…all the sounds the dying make as they slip closer and closer to oblivion. The doctor stared and started to shake, curling in on himself as he had done back at the village.

"What’s the matter, Suikotsu?" Jakotsu taunted. "You look like you’ve never seen blood before. You are a doctor, aren’t you?"

When the sun came up, the full extent of this room’s cruelty would be revealed. When Jakotsu had attacked this village yesterday, he had been careful not to kill everyone outright. At least two dozen he left mortally wounded, but bleeding out slowly. Those unfortunate souls he dragged into this room, to perish gradually in despair and agony. It was beautiful. Some were surely dead already, but enough survived to accomplish his objective. Perhaps Suikotsu would simply wallow in sorrow until his true self emerged. Perhaps he would try futilely to save the survivors, and give in to his darkness as they slipped away one by one. There were a couple children in here, if Jakotsu remembered correctly. He hoped they were still alive; watching them die would be especially hard for the ‘good doctor’ to take.

Snickering softly to himself, Jakotsu left the hut and barred the door behind him. He stuck around until the sun was peeking halfway over the eastern horizon, and the light of day had fully illuminated the carnage of this horrible, beautiful place.

Then the screaming began.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Whew…I creep myself out sometimes. I suppose I should mention that the village from the first part of this chapter is not the one where Suikotsu took up residence in canon. That village was closer to Mount Hakurei. In this story, the Inu-gang took a lengthy detour before arriving at Mount Hakurei, so the members of the Shichinintai have had more time to spread out away from the mountain. The decimated village at the end is probably that canon village, actually. It doesn’t really matter. All you have to know is that Jakotsu took Suikotsu to a place very close to Mount Hakurei.


	12. The Poison User

Mukotsu grumbled to himself as he mixed his potions. He was still a bit peeved about the events of the previous evening. _I should have been able to spend the whole night with that cute young girl, the one with the Shikon fragments._ Instead, Jakotsu had taken so bloody long to finish Inuyasha off, that the sun went down and he nearly wound up getting himself killed. _He’d better be damn grateful that I saved his foolish ass._

He had done it without hesitation once he saw the trouble his comrade was in. There were practical reasons, but he also genuinely liked the guy. Jakotsu was a bit dim-witted, but was a decent enough traveling companion as long as you weren’t an attractive male, which unfortunately Mukotsu was not. Most of the time he preferred to be alone, but he had worked with Jakotsu a couple of times since their resurrection, and the results had been most profitable. At least he never had to fight with Jakotsu over a woman, a conflict he would invariably lose to any other member of the Shichinintai. His and Jakotsu’s interests were pretty much mutually exclusive that way.

So he had saved the perverted baka, and was glad for it. He sensed another opportunity for mutually beneficial cooperation here, and hoped to enlist his ally’s aid. He had told a Saimyoushou to inform Jakotsu that he wished to see him. Another Saimyoushou was keeping tabs on the Inu-gang as they moved closer to Mount Hakurei. The insects were creepy, but quite useful. Mukotsu was keeping pace with the Inu-gang as they traveled, Naraku’s spies allowing him to stay close but far enough away to avoid detection. Now, if he could just get Jakotsu to cooperate with him, then they could both end up with the victim they truly wanted. _Or perhaps_ victims _. That other woman was cute too. I would love to watch the fire go out of her eyes._

Suddenly he sensed a presence behind him, and grinned happily. At last something was going according to plan!

"Hey, Jakots—ack!" The garbled end of his greeting came courtesy of Jakotsu’s foot being planted firmly in his face.

"You bastard," Jakotsu complained. "What’s the big idea with breaking up my fight with Inuyasha?"

Mukotsu growled in annoyance and smacked the foot away. "Did you forget, you imbecile, that Inuyasha was about to slaughter you?!"

Jakotsu scratched his cheek and pouted like a child. "I hate having my fun interrupted…"

Mukotsu knew that this was as close to an acknowledgement as he was going to get, so he changed the subject. They had much more important matters to discuss, after all.

"Anyway, Jakotsu, what would you say if I told you I could arrange a battle for you and Inuyasha, just the two of you?"

"Really?!" Jakotsu replied, perking up immediately.

"Indeed. All you need to do is keep Inuyasha busy while I kidnap the girls. You can have the houshi too if you want."

"REALLY?!!! Inuyasha AND the houshi!!!" Jakotsu clapped his hands together, appearing ready to start jumping up and down at any moment. "When, when, when?!"

"Today, I think. I know the perfect place for an ambush. Just let me finish my poisons, and we’ll go make our preparations."

"Okay!"

Then Jakotsu was off, prancing around with bouncy steps and humming softly to himself. Mukotsu shook his head. He didn’t care what that pervert had planned for Inuyasha and the houshi. As long as he had those girls to keep himself well entertained.

* * *

Inuyasha cursed under his breath, sprinting as fast as his legs could carry him. Kagome gripped his shoulders tightly, her scent speaking of frustration and anger. He knew the feeling. It seemed that the events of yesterday were repeating themselves. The scent of blood, and lots of it, had reached his nose only moments ago. The group had set out immediately to investigate; Sango had not even taken the time to change into her taijiya armour before she and Miroku mounted Kirara.

It certainly appeared that their haste was warranted. They crested a small rise and spied a medium-sized village laid out before them, a profound sense of déjà vu settling over them. Panicked humans fleeing in every direction, others lying dead or dying in pools of their own blood. And in the center of it all, looking quite pleased by the slaughter, stood Jakotsu. He spotted the Inu-gang a fair distance off, as if he’d been looking for them to appear in that direction. Instead of preparing himself for combat, as Inuyasha would have expected, the mercenary took off in the opposite direction.

"Son of a bitch!" Inuyasha swore, skidding to a halt and setting Kagome down. He had every intention of pursuing Jakotsu, but he wasn’t going to take Kagome into danger. Jakotsu’s retreat was highly suspicious, since the pervert had seemed so keen on fighting him yesterday. And it was broad daylight right now. Something else had to be going on for him to run away so quickly.

"Take Kagome," he told Miroku and Sango as Kirara landed beside him.

"You do realize that this is likely a trap, Inuyasha," Miroku posed.

"I know that! But how many more will die if we don’t kill that bastard now?"

Miroku nodded, then scooted back and helped Kagome settle in front of him. Nobody liked this, but there was nothing for it. Unless they wanted more innocent people to die by Jakotsu’s blade, they had no choice but to run into whatever trap awaited them. Or rather, Inuyasha had no choice. He made the others agree to hang back and support him from a distance. He was fairly certain he could deal with whatever the Shichinintai could throw at him, but he wasn’t so sure about his human companions. They were strong fighters, but humans in general were physically vulnerable. A hanyou could take a few severe hits and recover. For a human, one mistake could mean death.

The others reluctantly agreed to this plan, at least until their enemies had revealed themselves and they knew what they were up against. Without further delay, they set off in pursuit. Their pace was slower than before, with Kirara bearing extra weight now, but was still far faster than a human could run. Inuyasha was careful not to get too far ahead of his companions, as frustrating as that was. But soon enough, Jakotsu came into view up ahead. He was entering a narrow canyon, carved into the land by some ancient river. The ground sloped upward on either side of the entrance before leveling off on a high plateau. The canyon loomed like a giant gash in the earth, bordered by sheer, massive walls almost a hundred meters high. Inuyasha could see that it continued in a more or less straight line for several hundred meters, then cut sharply to the right. And whatever surprise lay in store for them probably lurked around that bend.

Inuyasha determined not to let Jakotsu make it that far. He accelerated, leaving Kirara behind as he charged up the slope. Soon he was sprinting along the top of the canyon, drawing abreast of and then overtaking Jakotsu. When he judged his lead was great enough, he turned and slid down the steep wall of the canyon, skidding to a halt at the bottom. Jakotsu was forced to stop as well, now faced with an angry hanyou directly in his path.

Disturbingly, the mercenary did not appear worried in the slightest to find his way barred, even after Inuyasha drew Tetsusaiga. In fact, he wore a confident, shit-eating grin, as if he knew something that the hanyou didn’t. Inuyasha was just about to ask him what the hell was so funny, when movement over Jakotsu’s shoulder drew his attention.

It was Kirara and the others, entering the canyon the same way Jakotsu had. Inuyasha’s eyes widened in alarm. Sango had probably seen what he was doing and directed Kirara that way to trap Jakotsu between them. It would have been a decent plan, but for one crucial defect. The first part of the canyon, which Kirara was now flying through, was uncharted territory. Inuyasha had skirted that area in order to cut in front of Jakotsu; he didn’t have a real good idea of what was over there. And suddenly, he had the sneaking suspicion that this trap the Shichinintai had orchestrated wasn’t really for him after all. He filled his lungs to shout a warning, but it was too late.

A blast came from the canyon wall directly to Kirara’s left, spewing blue-black smoke into the narrow space. It was of a different shade than the smoke from yesterday, but Inuyasha still held his breath until Kirara emerged from the cloud a moment later. He felt elation until her transformation suddenly reversed in mid-air. She plummeted lifelessly toward the earth, leaving her human charges to free fall. It was truly fortunate that the fire-cat had only been flying a few meters above the ground. Inuyasha saw Miroku grab Kagome and swing her so he bore the brunt of the fall. The hanyou felt a surge of gratitude that the monk would think of Kagome and the baby first even at his own peril. Kagome rose to her knees, but Miroku remained prone and unmoving, possibly unconscious. He would obviously be quite battered and bruised, at any rate.

Sango was the only one who managed to descend gracefully, landing feet first and rolling to lessen the impact on her legs. She had just finished strapping her taijiya mask to her face when the expanding cloud rolled over her, obscuring all of them from view.

"Kagome!" Inuyasha yelled, moving toward her automatically. He raised Tetsusaiga just in time to block a savage strike from Jakotsutou.

"You should really worry about yourself, Inuyasha," Jakotsu purred. "You’re _mine_ now."

"Get out of my fucking way, you bastard!"

"Oh my, so _furious!_ Your angry face is sexy too."

"You sick fu—"

The sound of another blast silenced him, and the smoke roiled out even further behind Jakotsu, a new, darker shade swirling with the old blue-black.

"Your friends are done now," Jakotsu observed, licking his lips and staring in ecstasy at Inuyasha’s panic-stricken face. "But don’t worry. Mukotsu doesn’t like to kill quickly, especially young girls. You have time to save your friends, but you’ll have to get through me first. You’d better hurry though, before something _terrible_ happens to them. So come at me, Inuyasha. Come at me with everything you’ve got!"

Inuyasha tightened his grip on Tetsusaiga, fighting to remain in control. He wanted nothing more than to give Jakotsu exactly what he asked for. But that was not an option; with the mercenary standing directly between him and the cloud of smoke which still might contain some of his friends, he could not risk using the Kaze no Kizu.

Inuyasha growled, realizing how perfectly they had fallen into the enemy’s trap. The Shichinintai’s goal this entire time had been to separate him from his friends, and pair him with Jakotsu while Mukotsu ambushed the rest of them. They had chosen the terrain perfectly; the only way for Inuyasha to get to his friends quickly was to go through Jakotsu. He could not hope to scale the sheer canyon walls without being torn to pieces. Nor could he flee in the opposite direction and circle back without wasting precious time, time Kagome and Sango likely did not have.

His blood boiled at the thought of what Mukotsu probably had planned for them. But despite the rage coursing through his veins, his head remained clear. So he had fallen into an enemy’s trap. That was nothing new. He would do what he had always done in the past—turn the situation on its head and make the enemy’s machinations backfire. The Shichinintai would regret the day they ever crossed him.

Inuyasha sheathed Tetsusaiga. Jakotsu seemed surprised by this, but the hanyou’s reasons were sound. For all its power, Tetsusaiga was somewhat unwieldy. It slowed him down, and mobility would be the key to this battle. He couldn’t get into a sword duel with Jakotsu, since not only would that take far too long, but it would naturally favor his opponent because of Jakotsutou’s much longer reach. No, Inuyasha knew he needed to close the distance and find a way to slip past Jakotsu. It was an extremely dangerous course of action, and he knew he would not escape injury, but his friends were counting on him. He was the only one who could rescue them from a horrible fate. Nothing else mattered.

Inuyasha took advantage of his enemy’s bewilderment to make the first move. But Jakotsu recovered quickly, the snake-like sword lancing out and forcing the hanyou to dodge after only a couple steps. He darted to the right, maintaining his forward momentum as the sword came at him again. This time he failed to correctly predict the blade’s trajectory, and had to bow his back and suck in his stomach to avoid having his intestines spilled out all over the ground. Jakotsutou’s next strike caught him off balance and left a deep gash in his thigh. With no alternative, Inuyasha leapt back out of danger and readied himself for another rush, ignoring the stinging pain which came whenever he put weight on his leg. His injuries didn’t matter. He would push his body to its limits and beyond if he had to.

Inuyasha’s next attempt ended in much the same way as the first, with two more lacerations on his back and upper arm. It became exponentially more difficult to dodge the sword the closer he got to Jakotsu. And the close confines of the canyon limited his options while still giving Jakotsutou plenty of room to come at him from unexpected directions. But he persevered, as the minutes ticked by and his wounds multiplied, until finally, he was forced to withdraw after an especially nasty slice to his shoulder.

Inuyasha stood just out of Jakotsu’s range, his posture slumped, breathing heavily. The bone at the front of his shoulder had been cut partially through, and everything above that was a bloody mess. He doubted if he would have full use of his left arm for the time being. His clothing was drenched in blood; his youkai healing abilities could not keep up with the dozens of lacerations and gouges in his flesh. If he continued like this, his fighting abilities would slowly deteriorate until Jakotsu landed a truly severe blow and finished him. He would die knowing that he had failed everyone he cared for.

"Oooh, that face is so exciting," Jakotsu cooed, eyeing him ravenously, spittle dripping from the corner of his mouth. "That’s it, Inuyasha. There’s nothing better than watching a man slowly lose all hope. Show me true despair!"

Inuyasha shook his head against those words, baring his fangs and renewing his resolve. It couldn’t end like that, for him or his friends. There had to be a way. And if it was truly hopeless, he would still fight with all of his being, until his body gave out. The poison smoke still lingered, obscuring the area where his friends had fallen, so the Kaze no Kizu remained off the table. But he did have another trump card, an ability linked to his own youki which Jakotsu did not know about. The trouble was coming up with a way to use this technique for maximum effect, because he only got one chance to surprise his enemy with it. If he failed, he would be back at square one.

He had conjured an idea several minutes ago, but thought it too reckless at the time. Not anymore. With his body weakening, he was ready to try something desperate. Especially given the ever increasing amount of time his friends were spending in the clutches of a depraved enemy.

The next time Jakotsutou came at him, Inuyasha stood his ground. Gritting his teeth, he dug into the wound in his left shoulder and flung the blood out in a wide arc. The droplets shifted into the blades of youki he knew as the Hijin Ketsusou, his hidden attack. He had discovered it as a child, quite by accident. An oni had wounded him and backed him into a corner. He had been holding his wound, because it hurt like hell, and when the oni attacked he had felt the call of his youkai blood and swung his arm out or reflex. The strange power had saved his life that day, and it had never failed him since. This, however, would be its toughest challenge. For unless the crimson blades managed to deflect Jakotsutou, the sword was going to tear him to pieces.

The scene seemed to play out in slow motion, as the youki blades soared past Jakotsutou on both sides. One struck the sword, and was dissipated. The next two were defeated in the same way. But finally, one of the crimson projectiles impacted the sword at just the right location and angle. Jakotsutou howled, shifting violently off course and embedding itself in the ground a half dozen meters in front of Inuyasha.

"What the—"

It was a momentary hesitation, a split-second of bewilderment from Jakotsu before he regained his composure and pulled back his sword. But it was all the time Inuyasha needed. In a flash he darted the short distance, then in a graceful full-body motion, threw everything he had behind a closed-fist strike which impacted the sword just above one of the swivel joints. Jakotsutou shuddered with the tremendous impact, cracking and creaking. And when its wielder raised his arm to retract it, the snake-like body shattered into at least four pieces.

Jakotsu swore aloud, but prepared to continue the battle with the approximately half-length sword still remaining to him. It would have been a tough battle too, though Inuyasha was confident he would have won. But the hairs on the back of his neck were standing on end. Whether it was purely his imagination, or some strange sixth sense, Inuyasha knew he could not afford to waste any more time on fighting Jakotsu. He could almost hear Kagome calling out for him. She needed him, _now_.

Quickly judging the distances involved, Inuyasha settled on a course of action. He leapt back a few meters, then took a running leap which would carry him up and over Jakotsu’s position in a long arc. The mercenary’s half-sword flashed harmlessly underneath him as he passed by, close enough so he could feel the displaced air. But he had calculated correctly, and as soon as he landed he took off at hanyou speed. His ears scanned behind him for sounds of pursuit, but evidently Jakotsu was smart enough not to follow. For the second time in as many meetings with Inuyasha, he had narrowly escaped death. Next time, the hanyou vowed that he would not be so lucky.

Inuyasha stopped only to see if any of his friends remained on the battlefield. The smoke had dissipated enough so that visibility was decent at close distances. Fortunately, the wind had blown the bulk of it deeper into the canyon, so that it hadn’t been hovering over his friends the whole time. His father’s youkai blood made him resistant to poison, but that stuff was acrid enough to make him cough heavily. He was not surprised to find Miroku, Shippou, and Kirara lying on the ground incapacitated, the latter two out cold and the monk barely holding onto consciousness.

"Inuyasha," Miroku rasped weakly, "he took them. Leave me…go save…Kagome and Sango."

"Shut up, bouzu."

That was the end of that little proposal, as feeble as Miroku was at the moment. Yes, carrying the monk would slow him down slightly, but he could never leave a friend behind. Especially not with the Shichinintai and Naraku’s own incarnations potentially roaming around. He shuddered to think what Jakotsu would do if he found Miroku lying there, alone and helpless. So deserting him was not an option; Inuyasha would just have to hope that the small delay in his arrival would not cost Kagome or Sango dearly.

He quickly stuffed Kirara and Shippou into the front of his robes, then hoisted Miroku onto his back and launched himself into a full sprint. The monk did his best to hold in his pained groans until he finally passed out ten seconds in. Inuyasha hated to jostle the man so much with the poison in his body, but he simply could not slow down to smooth out the ride. They had no time left. Kagome needed him, _now._

So he followed the scents, moving at a pace which would soon leave even his resilient body breathless. His wounds reopened with the violence of his motion, but he paid them no heed. The pain he channeled into desperation, fueling his exhausted muscles to further impossible feats. His heart pounded in his chest, both from physical exertion and the premonitions of imminent disaster running through his mind. He was close now, so close. He prayed he would not be too late.

* * *

Mukotsu whistled jauntily to himself as he ambled off to his temporary lair. Really, what was there to not be happy about? He had a pretty girl under each arm, and his ally was taking care of the one meddlesome male capable of ruining his fun. The only reason he was moving his victims away at all was to get out of earshot. Hearing any of the screams Inuyasha made as Jakotsu tortured him to death would put quite a damper on his mood. No, he wanted to focus exclusively on those delightful, involuntary sounds his girls would soon be making.

He briefly tightened his grip on the taijiya’s waist, just to get a weak cough and a muffled curse out of her. He was going to enjoy playing with this one especially, seeing as how she’d nearly killed him. The initial ambush had gone exactly according to plan. He had pulled the cord which set off the container he’d embedded in the side of the canyon at exactly the right moment. The poison released would have little effect on humans, but would knock weaker youkai unconscious for quite a while. Any youkai-specific poison with stronger effects than that would also kill humans very quickly, and that was no fun at all. The poison he himself had shot at the group a few moments later was designed for humans, on the other hand. It quickly incapacitated all of them, entering through the eyes and skin so even the taijiya with her gas mask went down. But not before she’d flung that cursed bone boomerang at him. She’d been unable to see him clearly through the smoke, but she obviously heard his approaching footsteps. And she aimed low too, as if she’d known how short he was. If he hadn’t stumbled over a fortuitously placed rock at exactly the right moment, he’d be dead right now. As it was, the boomerang whizzed over his head, close enough to take off his head covering. That had pissed him off; he _hated_ when people saw how bald he was. He’d given the taijiya a few good kicks for the trouble. At least none of the people who’d seen him today would live to see the sunset.

One nice thing about being one of the undead, he’d noticed, was that his body was physically stronger than before. Whereas while he’d been alive, carrying two girls would have been somewhat of a challenge, now he found it relatively easy. So he made good time, and in just a few minutes the hut he’d chosen as his den came into view. He hopped over the ditch he’d dug, then kicked over the bucket containing the reactant and smirked as a thick screen of poison rose up around the hut. The defensive measure was probably unnecessary, but one could never be too careful.

Chuckling gleefully, he dropped his girls on the floor and stood back to admire them, fingering his chin thoughtfully. _Hmm…which one shall I play with first?_ The taijiya was scared, but she hid it behind a mask of defiance. The other one had fear written all over her face, but he sensed that she too had some fight in her. Either one would be highly enjoyable. But the taijiya had pissed him off, so should he turn his attentions to her first, or make her watch as he toyed with her friend? Decisions, decisions.

Kagome lay there helplessly, her skin crawling. She tried to steady her heartbeat and calm her mind, to think of a way out of this. It helped to look at Sango, whose gaze reflected grim encouragement. _No matter what happens, be brave,_ the taijiya seemed to be saying. Kagome tried, she really did, but inside she was absolutely petrified. There were a very limited number of reasons why a man such as this would take two incapacitated women into his private lair. The general vibe she was getting off him seemed to confirm her fears. And beyond that, the poison coursing through her body was a major concern as well. True, it had only paralyzed her and Sango at this point. She didn’t feel like her life was in immediate danger from the toxin, but that could be misleading. Her body throbbed with dull pain, which she believed was only bearable because the poison was suppressing her nervous system. Was that the poison working to end her life, or merely a side effect of the paralysis? Their captor, whom she assumed to be Mukotsu of the Shichinintai, didn’t seem like the type of person to keep his victims alive for any significant length of time. Just long enough to satisfy his base urges, most likely.

What worried her most of all, however, was the threat to the baby inside of her. She had become cognizant of this danger almost immediately after picking herself off the ground at the battlefield. Or rather, off Miroku, who had so bravely taken the brunt of their fall for the sake of her and Inuyasha’s unborn child. She had seen Shippou lying in a heap a few feet away, and gathered him up in her arms, fearing the worst. But the kit appeared to be simply unconscious, sleeping soundly. It was then that she realized what had happened. The purpose of the poison which had been shot at them was to disable youkai, without harming any humans who happened to be in the area. It burned her throat when she breathed, but the sensation was no worse than having mild strep throat. Other than that, the poison didn’t affect her at all. But she had breathed it in, inadvertently taking it into her bloodstream. And if it could knock Shippou and Kirara unconscious, what could it do to a tiny quarter-youkai fetus?

That question had terrified her. She knew that her body formed a natural barrier between herself and the fetus, namely the placenta. But while the placenta was effective against most harmful diseases and toxins which occurred naturally, it had not evolved to combat manmade pollutants. This was why most physicians advised against smoking or drinking during pregnancy, because those toxins could make it through. So would Mukotsu’s poison penetrate the placental barrier as well? And if so, could she do anything to prevent this?

Nothing came to mind. Unlike Naraku’s miasma, Mukotsu’s poisons were not youki-based, and therefore could not be purified. But her spiritual energy was the only thing she could rely on, so she summoned it, not really knowing what she was doing but aware that she had to do _something_. Even if she had known how to create solid barriers, forming one around the baby was not an option. It would die without the oxygen and nutrients carried by her bloodstream. But she hoped, perhaps naively, that she could provide some assistance to her own body’s efforts to filter the toxins before reaching the baby.

Up to now, the baby seemed to be doing fine, even with the second, human-specific type of poison pervading her body. He was highly distressed due to her condition, but his aura had not diminished at all, which she would have taken as a sign of his tiny body succumbing to the toxins. Whether his apparent good health was her own body’s doing or her spiritual energy had made a difference, she might never know. But one thing was for certain—she couldn’t truly save the baby without also protecting herself. He was not nearly mature enough at this stage to survive on his own, quarter-youkai or no. If she died, then he died with her.

And this was the greatest reason she feared for her own life. Yes, she was terrified of the things Mukotsu likely had planned for her, but she would bear it all if only she could survive, so her and Inuyasha’s child would also survive. Thinking of Inuyasha gave her strength, enough to turn her attention to what _she_ could do, rather than what Mukotsu was going to do. Her hanyou was likely fighting for his life at this very moment, desperately battling Jakotsu in an effort to break through and come to their aid. _I’ll do what I can, but Inuyasha…please hurry._

"I sure am a lucky guy," Mukotsu declared, sauntering over to her. Every thread of sanity in Kagome screamed at her to run away, but her muscles remained unresponsive. She could only watch helplessly as Mukotsu knelt next to her and grabbed her chin, roughly turning her head from side to side.

He chuckled darkly. "Such a pretty girl. And I can do whatever I want with you." He shifted to lean over her, and Kagome screwed her eyes shut in revulsion.

"Open your eyes!" he snapped, slapping her lightly on the cheek. She reluctantly complied, sensing the threat in his tone. Steeling her resolve, she looked directly at his hideous, misshapen face, starting defiantly into those huge, bulbous eyes. She hoped to glimpse some trace of humanity within those milky white depths, but instead saw only cruelty.

"Good," he spat, apparently satisfied. "With this face, I don’t seem to be very popular with the ladies."

If Kagome had been paying attention, she might have reflected that the most repulsive thing about this man was certainly not the appearance of his face. But while Mukotsu had been talking, she had surreptitiously focused her spiritual energy and located his shard of the Shikon no Tama. It was in his neck, exactly where Jakotsu’s had been. The poison held her mostly immobile, but she did retain some motor control. If she could just find a way to remove the shard, then Mukotsu would die.

"What’re you thinking about, I wonder?" her captor pondered, eyeing her critically. Then he shrugged. "Eh, it doesn’t matter. I’ll make sure that you’ll be thinking only of _me_ from now on. Let’s make a fond memory before you die, girl."

He leaned over her again, and Kagome felt a surge of panic run through her. His face hovered over hers as he grinned down at her, saliva dripping to land on her chin before he licked his lips lasciviously. When he leaned down to kiss her, she managed to muster the muscle coordination to turn her head aside. This process repeated itself several times in rapid succession, until Mukotsu growled in frustration and grabbed her around the throat.

"Oh, hold still already," he snarled, whatever playfulness he had exhibited earlier suddenly replaced by old pain and anger. Now he shifted position again, as if to hold her down as he ravaged her face. His free hand shoved her shoulder to the floorboards, and his leg swung over to plant his knee firmly in her belly.

Kagome reacted instinctively to the pressure on her womb. Logically, Mukotsu probably couldn’t hurt the baby with his body weight alone unless he actually stood on her stomach. But her protective reflexes made no such distinction. It took a herculean effort, but she was able to twist her body to the side, so that Mukotsu’s knee slid off her belly and clunked painfully against the floor.

"Ow!" he cried, drawing back and rubbing his bruised knee. "What the hell is wrong with you, girl?" He glared at her, baffled by the way she curled in on herself and wrapped her arms around her belly.

"My knee couldn’t have hurt that much," he observed thoughtfully. "Do you have an injury or something?" A quick lift of her shirt revealed that she didn’t. "No, that’s not it. Then why are you so protective of your be—"

He froze, eyes going impossibly wide. He studied her, somehow finding his answer in the way she glared defiantly back at him. Then his bottom lip quivered, and tears pooled in his eyes. Far from inspiring sympathy, the sudden show of emotion filled Kagome with dread. Perhaps her instinctive reaction had not been wise.

"You…you…you WHORE!!!"

He reared back and punched her in the face, so hard that her teeth chattered and her body was flung to the side. When she opened her eyes again, she found Sango gazing at her, no longer concealing her fear. Kagome was suddenly very afraid. The single greatest thing keeping her baby alive was Mukotsu’s ignorance of its presence. Now he knew it was there, and he could do anything he wanted. There was little she could do to stop him.

He yanked her back by the hair and proceeded to slap her across the face a few times, shouting insults all the while. Finally, he dropped her and began to pace around the hut, talking animatedly.

"I can’t believe it. My rare beauty, knocked up by some jerk! The bastard’s probably a lot more handsome than me, too. It was that damn hanyou, wasn’t it?" he demanded, pointing an accusing finger at her. Again, he inferred her response from her silence, closing both hands into fists and growling furiously. Then his face lit up, as if he’d thought of a wonderful idea. His eyes scanned the hut, then settled on something which was out of Kagome’s line of sight. His lips twisted into a vicious smirk as he stalked over and picked up whatever object had caught his attention.

"No…please don’t."

The soft, desperate plea came not from Kagome, but from Sango. Evidently, the taijiya could see what had interested Mukotsu so, and had discerned his intentions. The horrified expression on her face made Kagome’s blood run cold.

Mukotsu cackled cruelly. "I can’t have any fun with a woman knowing she’s carrying another man’s brat. So the natural solution, I suppose, is to remove the brat."

He appeared in front of her, and Kagome’s heart nearly stopped. There, held in his hand like a weapon, were the pokers from the fire pit. The black metal seemed to glint evilly, perfectly illustrating how sharp they were. And suddenly she knew why Sango had been so horrified.

"Come on, girl. Let’s get rid of that hanyou taint in your belly."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Ick, two creepy chapter endings in a row. The pokers are those two little chopstick-like metal things connected by a ring, that Kagome tried to stab Mukotsu with in canon. This is supposed to conjure up thoughts of coat-hanger abortions. I’m assuming that something similar was done in Japan in the feudal era. Their culture doesn’t seem very forgiving of pregnancy outside marriage, so I think it’s a pretty safe assumption. Again, ick. I will try to be a little quicker with the next chapter this time.


	13. Sacrifice

WARNING – this chapter contains non-consensual sexual content. Nothing overly graphic is portrayed, but the content is there.

　

Sacrifice

　

Kagome could only stare at her captor in horror, as he turned the pokers over in his hands and fingered his chin contemplatively.

"I suppose there are two ways to do this," Mukotsu muttered. He held the poker vertically like a knife, subconsciously making small stabbing motions as he continued to think out loud. "This way is easier, I suppose, but then you’d bleed out pretty quickly. It’s hard to have fun with a girl who’s half-dead from blood loss. I like ‘em to be fully aware, at least until the poison kills them.

"The other way of course is more difficult," he observed thoughtfully, "and if I mess it up, then you’ll likely bleed out anyway. Hm…what to do, what to do…"

"Go fuck yourself…that’s what you can do," Sango ground out, the poison in her system making coherent speech a real challenge.

Mukotsu ignored her. "I did get to observe the procedure once, but it was so long ago that I don’t know if I remember." Finally, after several more moments of deliberation, he shrugged. "Eh, what the hell? Let’s give it a try. And if I accidentally kill you prematurely, then at least I’ll have the chance to get intimately acquainted with that not-so-virgin flower of yours."

Kagome paled visibly, grisly stories of back-alley abortions and women killed or scarred for life running through her mind. Such practices were on the decline in the modern world as abortion became more widely legalized, but she knew that women still became victims every day, especially in the third world. It would be terrible enough to lose the child inside of her, but to be rendered incapable of having children in the future was an unfathomably dreadful thought.

Mukotsu grinned, drinking in her fear. The girl didn’t know it, but in his younger days he’d actually trained to be a healer. Part of mastering the craft was learning what substances could kill you, a subject he’d always found to be far more fascinating that actually healing people. Eventually, he’d discovered his true calling, and by the time the Shichinintai had recruited him he’d already been a master poison user. But in his youth, he had indeed observed his master’s attempt to terminate a pregnancy. The luckless girl had been barely out of puberty, and was carrying a rapist’s child. She’d tried every herbal remedy available, but nothing worked. Finally, his master had attempted to remove the brat manually. But something went wrong, and the girl started bleeding internally. It had taken her three days to die; he could still hear her delightful groans of agony and despair. But at least she hadn’t been pregnant anymore. And since his current victim was likely going to die soon from the poison anyway, what did he care if he injured her? As long as that hanyou’s whelp was no longer alive in her belly.

"You bastard…leave her alone!"

"Now, now, taijiya," Mukotsu scolded lightly, quite amused by her feeble outbursts. "Wait your turn. I’ll be with you soon enough." He strolled over to Kagome and wrestled her knees apart with his hands, taking a moment to admire her panty-clad womanhood with an appreciative whistle.

"Those are some strange smallclothes. But I like ‘em!"

"You ugly…son of a bitch!"

Mukotsu’s hand had been reaching to tear off Kagome’s panties, but it froze at Sango’s words. It was just a momentary hitch, but it was enough to let the taijiya know that she’d finally found a sore spot. Sometimes, she reflected with a victorious smile, it was best to just go with the obvious.

"You’re nothing but…a hideous freak."

"Shut up, taijiya," Mukotsu growled, finally turning his full attention toward Sango.

"With that revolting face…have you ever found a woman…willing to share your bed?"

"I said shut up!"

"When you came out…your own mother probably…wanted to kill herself."

"Don’t…"

"If she saw you now…she’d throw herself off a cliff."

"Don’t!" Mukotsu shrieked, his already disfigured face contorting with uncontrollable rage. "Don’t talk about MY MOTHER!!!"

In a flash, he rose to his feet and pounced on Sango like a predator. The taijiya raised a hand as if to ward him off, but the poison in her body rendered the attempt useless. Mukotsu snatched her wrist out of the air, slammed it against the floor, and stabbed the pokers into her palm so viciously that they passed completely through her flesh and embedded in the wood underneath. Sango squealed in pain, and received a backhand across the face for it.

"So bitch, I’ve never had a willing woman, have I?" Mukotsu snarled. "So what?! I’ve had _plenty_ of women, and I don’t _care_ if they’re willing or not. I’m about to have _you_ in the same way. I’m going to teach you a lesson for insulting me."

Most women might have been frightened into submission at this point. Not Sango. She leaned her head up as far as she could and spit at Mukotsu’s face. Only one droplet of saliva actually made it to the target, but Mukotsu was obliged to wipe it off of his cheek with a finger. He stared at it in disbelief, then turned his irate gaze to Sango, as his eyes became bloodshot, tinged with insanity. He threw his head back and let loose an inhuman wail, and when he turned his attention back to her, Sango knew that she had achieved her goal.

His fist snapped her head around and caused her skull to smack against the floorboards, leaving her lightly dazed. She wished the blow had knocked her unconscious. The next few minutes of her life would be much less unpleasant if she was not awake to experience them. She knew her choice was correct, and if she had the chance to go back, she would do the same thing over again. She only hoped that the consequences would not be too much for her to bear.

Kagome came out of her stupor at her friend’s cry. Maybe she had gone into a bit of shock, from the poison and from seeing Mukotsu standing over her, about to kill her baby. She remembered everything that had transpired since then, but it had seemed surreal at the time, as if it was happening on some other plane. After all, why on earth would Sango intentionally provoke Mukotsu like that? Then the answer came to her, and she gasped, turning to observe her friend’s plight.

Sango coughed, spitting blood out onto the floor. The entire left side of her face was swelling up into one massive bruise, courtesy of the series of slaps and punches directed there. Kagome swallowed a scream as Sango’s crazed attacker wrenched open her robes, then punched her hard just below the ribs. Several more fevered blows left her gasping for breath, even as Mukotsu’s hands began to maul her breasts. His nails tore at the cloth binding, scraping her tender flesh raw. Mad laughter escaped his throat as he sought to inflict more and more pain. Sango held in her cries and remained mostly silent, but her bravery only seemed to incite her attacker to heightened brutality.

It was then that the two women locked gazes. Sango stared into her friend’s horrified, tearful eyes, and drew strength from them. Seeing Kagome reminded her of why she had chosen this path in the first place.

For Kagome, the message her friend relayed back to her was nothing short of staggering. It was as if Sango was telling her that everything was okay, that she had wished for this. And finally, the full import of the taijiya’s sacrifice became clear. Sango had intentionally drawn Mukotsu’s attention and driven him into a rage, to save Kagome and the tiny life growing inside her. She was willing to give up everything, and endure a terrible experience, to buy Inuyasha more time to arrive and rescue them. It was amazing, such courage and devotion. Simply amazing.

But Kagome’s heart cried out in protest. She could not lay back and allow Sango to be raped, no matter how noble her intentions were. She had to do _something!_ Unfortunately, there was only one way out of this. With their bodies crippled by poison, neither she nor Sango stood any chance of overpowering their captor. The only way to kill him and end this torment was to remove his jewel shard. But how? Even if she could manage to get over there, her chances of yanking the shard out with her fingers were slim to none. She needed a weapon, but Mukotsu’s hut seemed to be hopelessly bereft of anything usable.

A glint of metal caught her eye, dark and sinister. It was the pokers from the fire, still embedded in Sango’s right hand. With every involuntary movement the taijiya made, her hand shifted up and down. About half the length of the pokers was stained red with blood, the constant friction on the wound surely adding to her misery. Suddenly, Kagome knew what she had to do. Even if this failed, she could at least take away a small portion of Sango’s pain.

Mustering every ounce of strength she possessed, Kagome attempted to roll onto her front. Her first effort failed, but she tried again, refusing to give up. Her muscles screamed in agony, but it was nothing compared to what Sango was feeling right now. Finally, she managed to flop gracelessly onto her stomach. Even that small move exhausted her, but there was no time for rest. Sango was still in peril. Mukotsu had grown bored with her chest and was now fumbling with her skirt, trying to remove it so he could throw open her kosode and have his way with her. Fortunately, in his frenzied state of mind, he was having trouble with it, but Kagome knew that would not last for long.

The next ten or fifteen seconds seemed to take hours, as she crawled across the floor. Finally, she drew directly abreast of Sango’s injured hand, and began to pull out the pokers. For once, luck was with her; the metal had not penetrated deeply into the wood, so even Kagome in her weakened state was able to yank them out. Sango yelped in surprise and cradled her hand against her chest, both of which served to draw Mukotsu’s attention.

"What the hell are you doing, girl?" he snarled, seemingly more annoyed than concerned. "Trust me, that little pinprick in her hand is the _least_ of your friend’s worries. Once I get this damn skirt off!"

Kagome felt a surge of relief. Mukotsu did not yet comprehend what she was really up to; he thought she had just wanted to ease Sango’s suffering. And as he became engrossed once more in his vile task, Kagome made her move. Somehow she forced herself into a half-sitting position, leaning heavily on her left arm as she focused her mind and located the jewel shard in Mukotsu’s neck. Then with a silent prayer for accuracy, she drove her right hand forward and stabbed the pokers into his flesh.

Time seemed to stand still. Mukotsu’s jaw dropped in shock, and for a brief moment Kagome thought she had been successful. Then his eyes hardened and the truth hit her, almost as hard as the fist which sent her sprawling to the floor. She had missed.

"Hmph, it seems that both of you girls wish to die first," Mukotsu declared, flinging the pokers away to clatter against the nearby wall. "Very well, girl, I’ll grant your wish."

Mukotsu’s body settled on top of her, but it was her heart which felt truly heavy, the crushing weight of her failure. Now her baby and her friend, the woman who had tried to sacrifice herself for her, were going to die because she had choked in the crucial moment. Was that not what she always did? There was a reason Inuyasha had to constantly save her. She had been a fool to believe that she could help anyone, pregnant or no.

Mukotsu’s hands closed around her neck, cutting off her air supply. Despite her sorrow and guilt, Kagome found it within her to struggle. But it was futile; she could no more pull his hands away than she could go back in time and shift her aim a couple centimeters higher. Finally her lungs began to burn, and her head swam, her consciousness wavering. Perhaps that was a blessing.

"I’m going to kill you, girl," Mukotsu told her. "And then I’m going to make what’s left of your friend’s life a living he—ack!"

Suddenly the pressure on her neck was gone, and Kagome inhaled a shuddering breath. Mukotsu had probably intended the remark as a final dagger through her heart, but in the end, her heart remained unpierced and the dagger proved to be not as figurative as he intended. As Kagome discovered when she opened her eyes and saw Sango’s hidden arm blade passing entirely through his forearm. Mukotsu did not bleed as a living human would, but he evidently felt pain just as strongly. He wrenched the blade from his arm, threw his head back and screamed. For all the pain this wretched man liked to inflict, he apparently did not have a high tolerance for it himself.

Kagome reflected morosely on the uselessness of Sango’s action. As soon as he recovered, Mukotsu was going to carry through with his plans. At most, the taijiya’s bravery had bought them a few extra seconds. The odds of Inuyasha actually being able to take advantage of that sliver of time were astronomical. Then she felt it—a warm hand grasping her own, cool metal placed into her palm.

"Do it, Kagome-chan," Sango rasped, her voice weak but carrying absolute faith.

Buoyed by Sango’s confidence, Kagome buried her despair, drawing conviction from the warmth of her friend’s touch, the hardness of the metal in her hands. She had failed once, but not this time. This time she would save their lives.

Mukotsu looked down, his eyes crossing as he studied the pokers protruding from his neck, and the arm attached to them. His gaze panned over to the girl who had stabbed him, and for the first time since his resurrection, he felt genuine fear. With an expression fiercer than any he had ever known, his rare beauty wrenched the pokers from his flesh, tearing out a chunk of his neck in the process. A tiny pink object fluttered in the air for a moment, glittering exquisitely as it fell to the floor and bounced across the wood.

"No way…"

Those were his final words. Within moments, his body had turned to dust, leaving only his clothing behind.

Kagome passively watched him disappear, allowing herself to indulge in some sense of relief. But there was no thrill of victory; the cost had been too high. Sango lay limply on her right side with eyes closed, her breathing shallow and haggard. As Kagome watched, she coughed and spit out more blood. Tears pooled in the miko’s eyes as she gazed at her friend, beaten to the point of merely existing, unable to muster the strength to even close her robes. How much pain was she in? The thought of Sango’s suffering tore a sob from Kagome’s throat. The knowledge that she could do nothing about it threatened to make her physically ill.

No, she could not relieve Sango’s pain. She couldn’t heal her, apply a soothing salve to her wounds, or even fetch water for her. Their exertions had accelerated the spread of the poison coursing through their bodies, further weakening both of them. Kagome doubted she could make it out of this hut, even if she tried. But despite her helplessness, she vowed to provide Sango whatever comfort she could. Slowly, painfully, she scooted over next to the older girl, lifting her head to pillow against her shoulder. Sango slumped bonelessly into her, and Kagome began to rub her hair soothingly, as the taijiya imagined the mother-to-be would do for her upset child one day. Sango smiled at the thought.

"Sango-chan," Kagome whispered, voice overflowing with raw emotion. "I’m so, so sorry. I…don’t know how to thank you."

"It’s okay…Kagome-chan. You would have…done the same…for me."

Kagome digested those words in silence, knowing they were true but still in a state of awe. "You’re the best friend I could ever ask for, Sango-chan. Like the sister I never had."

"Kagome-chan…"

"How badly are you hurt?"

"I’ve been…in worse shape."

Kagome questioned the truth of that statement, but kept her doubts to herself. Between her physical wounds and the poison, Sango was in rough shape. If she survived this, her worst scars would perhaps be emotional. As a woman, she had been violated, plain and simple. She had not been raped, but it had been a near thing. Even a woman as strong and brave as Sango would surely suffer some emotional consequences from this. But that was a worry for another day. Because if their bodies gave out, their psychological health wouldn’t matter. If someone did not arrive soon to take care of them, they were both going to die here.

As if on cue, Kagome heard the sound of the tatami mat being torn asunder, casting bright sunlight into the room. When she looked to the source, her breath hitched.

"Inuyasha…"

He stood in the entryway, breathing heavily with exertion. He was battered and bloodied as well, and appeared to be favoring one leg. But to Kagome, with the light shining behind him like a divine halo, he was nothing short of a blessing from the Kami.

Inuyasha noticed several things immediately, some of which filled him with dread. But the one which stood out the most, that chased away the crushing fears which had gripped him during his mad dash, was Kagome’s face. She was smiling, albeit hesitantly, her eyes shining with gladness. He gathered that whatever negative emotions she was feeling were regarding Sango’s condition, rather than her own or their child’s. But he wasted no more time in darting to her side, needing to be sure.

"Are you okay, Kagome?"

He touched her face, where it looked like she had been struck a couple times. But those were relatively minor, and in fact she didn’t appear to have suffered any significant injuries. Aside from the poison, of course, which in itself was life-threatening.

"I’m okay. Just, the poison," she told him, as if reading his thoughts.

"Is that bastard Mukotsu dead?"

Kagome nodded in response.

"What about the baby?"

She closed her eyes for a moment, focusing inwardly. "He’s okay too. Somehow, the poison isn’t affecting him."

Inuyasha sighed in relief, but took a moment to lift Kagome’s shirt and place his ear to her belly. He believed her, but he needed that sensory confirmation. Kagome seemed to understand, and made no protest. Upon hearing the child’s heartbeat, Inuyasha turned his attention to the other woman in the room.

"Sango…shit."

He realized how insensitive that was, but the taijiya only grinned wryly. She still had her eyes closed, and when she spoke it sounded as though she was hovering on the border of unconsciousness. Perhaps it was better that she was somewhat out of it, because her injuries looked like they would _hurt_. She was leaning up against Kagome, but he could see a portion of one of her breasts, which looked like an animal had been at it. That, and the disheveled nature of her clothing clued him in as to what Mukotsu had been doing.

"That bad…huh?"

"N-no, it’s not that bad. You look fine," he lied. Sango snorted but made no further comment. ‘Was she…’ Inuyasha mouthed at Kagome, who shook her head. The hanyou nodded, grateful for the good news. Sango had apparently been molested, but she was the toughest human he knew. If he could help her survive the poison, then she would be back to her old self in no time. He knew what the first step on that road to recovery was, and hoped it wouldn’t be too awkward.

"Sango, can I…help you up and fix your clothes?"

Her smile vanished, but she nodded, so he set to work. He gingerly helped her into a sitting position, supporting her so she didn’t topple over. Closing the kosode properly without jostling her injuries was a real challenge, but he took his time and managed to get it done. And he certainly did not take any liberties with his eyes or his hands. Sango for one seemed to appreciate his consideration.

"Thanks, Inuyasha," she said as he laid her back down. "Better you than…Houshi-sama, I suppose," she joked, before her expression turned serious once more. "Where is Houshi-sama?"

"I left him right outside. There’s a ring of poison around this hut. I gotta get you two outta here."

"Is he okay?"

"Keh. That idiot’s too stubborn to die so easily. He got poisoned though."

Sango digested that information in silence, and Inuyasha turned to his next task. He quickly came up with what he hoped was the best way to carry the two women without making the experience miserable for them.

"Kagome, can you hold onto Sango?"

The miko nodded, and Inuyasha positioned them so that Kagome was essentially spooning Sango. Then he slid his arms underneath both of them and lifted, supporting them at the ribs and under the knees. Sango rested partially on Kagome, but not uncomfortably so. He had to grit his teeth against the fresh pain in his left shoulder, but his own well-being was a secondary concern at the moment. Gingerly, he carried the two women out of the hut and leapt over the billowing wall of poison. Then he laid them down next to Miroku, Shippou, and Kirara, and turned to gaze out over the horizon, wondering what the hell he was going to do now.

* * *

Sango woke to the pleasant sensation of fingers running gently over her cheek. For some reason, she thought this should probably hurt. Then as her memory returned, she recalled the severe beating she’d taken to that side of her face. But the touch was so soft and reverent, that only a tingling warmth emanated from the affected area. She opened her eyes, expecting to discover Kagome or perhaps Shippou caressing her like that, but instead found herself face to face with Miroku.

She gasped at the expression on his face, the haunted look in his eyes. As if seeing her in such a pitiful condition was incredibly painful for him. She saw guilt, irrational to be sure but still present. And beyond all of that, there lurked other emotions which she dared not name, one in particular which caused her heart to swell. In her semi-delirious state, she could not be completely sure what was real and what was a figment of her imagination.

"Sango…are you all right?"

"F-fine, Houshi-sama."

"Are you certain?" he asked, his tone doubtful.

"Y-yes. Just a little beat up."

He still didn’t look like he believed her, so she did something to distract him. Something which she would normally never do, yet seemed oddly appropriate in this situation, with both of them so weak from the poison. She reached up with her uninjured left hand and removed his hand from her face, squeezing it reassuringly as she brought it down to settle between them. Miroku squeezed back, and finally the doubt left his expression, replaced once again by worry and that other emotion she was probably imagining.

A shiver passed through her suddenly, courtesy of a cool gust of wind. Idly she wondered how nice it would be to lie in Miroku’s embrace, how warm it would feel in his arms. A bit of color returned to her cheeks at this thought, but again, her condition gave her courage. What did she have to lose? If she was going to die, what better place than the arms of her beloved?

Too embarrassed nevertheless to tell him outright what she wanted, and too weak to move to him, she had to resort to repeatedly tugging on his hand until he got the message. It took a substantial feat of will for the monk to move his exhausted body, but there was no way he was going to miss out on this opportunity, even if the exertion killed him. Sango let out a contented sigh as she settled against him, her head resting on his arm. She felt him place a tender kiss to her temple as she drifted off to sleep.

Inuyasha snorted and shook his head at the pair. _It figures that those idiots would need to be on the verge of death to have a ‘moment.’_ Mildly amusing as the notion was, it also carried a dark truth. Kagome, Miroku, and Sango were all on the verge of death. It would not be immediate, unless their conditions took a dramatic turn for the worse, but all of them were spiraling down into the abyss. It was happening before his very eyes, even in the ten minutes he had taken to come up with a plan. He had been hoping that Kirara would wake up, but the fire-cat was still hopelessly unconscious. And that meant moving his friends would be a real challenge.

He didn’t want to move them, to be sure, as that would only quicken the effects of the poison. But they desperately needed treatment, and he couldn’t do anything here. Their bodies couldn’t fight the poison on their own. Kagome had some medicine in her bag that might help, and he thought he knew a few herbs which when mashed into tea and drank could counteract certain poisons. Not to mention the stab wound in Sango’s right hand, which needed to be cleaned and bandaged lest it become infected. Unfortunately, all of the supplies which would enable him to take any of those measures were back at the battlefield. And he didn’t dare leave his friends alone for any length of time; they had tempted fate enough for one day.

In addition, he needed to find a safe place for them to recuperate, out of the mercy of the elements. Weakened bodies fell ill much more easily than strong ones. Even a simple cold could be enough to kill any one of them at this point. Also, it was fairly obvious that Naraku, and by extension the Shichinintai, knew where they were and what shape they were in. A Saimyoushou had flown away with Mukotsu’s jewel shard a few minutes ago while he wasn’t looking. The best remedy for avoiding further trouble would seem to be staying on the move. It was a no-win situation, really. Move too much, and you accelerate your friends’ deaths. Move too little, and some bastard with a jewel shard tries to kill you. Not that he would ever shy from combat, at least for his own sake. There was always that savage part of him, lurking deep within, that just wanted to hunt down and slaughter every single one of these bastards. But his friends had to come first, and if taking care of them meant running away from his enemies, then so be it.

He rolled his left shoulder experimentally and bit back a curse as fresh blood leaked from the wound. If he found Kagome’s bag, he would have to bandage himself as well, just to try to conserve as much blood as he could. Every drop lost could mean the difference between life and death, if an enemy found them. But for now, all he could do was groan miserably, knowing what he had to do and how much it was going to suck.

He allowed himself to indulge in self-pity for all of two seconds before setting about his task. Miroku and Sango were already nestled together, so all he had to do was carry Kagome over and set her down so that she rested halfway on top of the monk. After placing Kirara and Shippou on Kagome’s lap, he knelt and picked everyone up in the say way he had carried the two women before. The load was heavier this time, and more awkward, but he managed to get to his feet even as his leg and shoulder screamed at him. After checking to make sure Miroku could still breathe with Kagome and Sango lying on him, Inuyasha decided that the humans were as comfortable as he could possibly make them. _Keh. If the bouzu was conscious, he’d be having a field day right now…damn, that fucking hurts!!!_

A determined growl rumbling in his throat, Inuyasha hobbled back toward the battlefield, careful to keep his pace slow. He didn’t want to jostle his precious cargo or aggravate his leg injury. He just prayed that their supplies were still there, or this would be an exhausting and potentially costly waste of time.

* * *

Inuyasha’s ear flicked, dislodging a pesky biting insect. The damn thing had been bothering him for a few minutes now, but he didn’t have a free hand to swat it away. So he had to settle for growling in annoyance and flicking his ear periodically as he trudged up yet another wooded hillside.

Aside from the fly, things were going about as well as he could have reasonably hoped for. His friends had not awoken since they departed Mukotsu’s hut a few hours ago, but they were all breathing steadily. Shippou and Kirara were starting to show signs of coming around as well, which would be a big help. Fortunately, that simpleton Jakotsu had not thought to make off with any of their supplies. Arriving back at the battlefield after an arduous trek, Inuyasha had given his friends the medicine from Kagome’s bag and made his own batch from various plants and water from one of her bottles. He wasn’t completely sure that he had remembered the recipe correctly, but there wasn’t much he could give them that would make their condition worse, so he decided to chance it. They had seemed to breathe a little easier after ingesting both medicines, so perhaps he had gotten it right after all. When Shippou woke up, he would ask his opinion; the kit might have better knowledge of poison antidotes than he did.

Inuyasha had also tended to Sango’s hand and bandaged his own shoulder, which by that point was oozing fresh blood with every step he took. His leg received similar treatment, and he felt much better to at least have something covering the wounds to control the bleeding. Another thing that helped was remembering how useful hiraikotsu could be as a tool for carrying people. Currently the boomerang was suspended behind him by both his hands, the three humans sitting on it and leaning against his back. The addition of Miroku made it much more awkward than it had been all those months ago with just Kagome and Sango, but he was managing. If he traveled slowly, he had no problem maintaining balance. This arrangement had the added bonus of being more comfortable for his friends and was easier on his shoulder.

There had been no way to carry Kagome’s massive bag, so he’d buried it under a fallen tree. He knew he could find it again if they decided to go back for it. If his friends recovered, of course. Getting a roof over their heads and a fire to keep them warm at night would help with that, he knew. He looked up at the sky and saw that the sun was somewhat west of its apex and was starting to make its way down toward the horizon. There was still plenty of daylight left, but soon the air would begin to cool. He had all senses tuned for signs of human habitation, but had found nothing so far. He’d thought about going back to the village Jakotsu had attacked earlier, but that would surely be the first place the Shichinintai would look for them, even if the traumatized villagers didn’t try to kill him on sight. Ideally, he would find an abandoned hut or cave somewhere, but if he had to go into a human settlement, he hoped the residents would at least allow him to stay the night since he had sick humans with him. And if not, a little show of force could do wonders.

So despite the dire situation, there was cause for optimism. Still, Inuyasha couldn’t help feeling like things were going a bit _too_ well. Given their recent track record, something was bound to go wrong very soon. So he was not surprised when that telltale scent of corpse and graveyard soil reached his nose. Cursing under his breath, he gently set his friends down and leaned them up against a large tree. He nudged Kirara, but the fire-cat only stirred slightly and did not wake.

"Shit," he growled, baring his fangs and drawing Tetsusaiga. His dark lurker rejoiced at the opportunity to shed an enemy’s blood, but the dominant hanyou part of him was anything but pleased. Nonetheless, he vowed that whoever this bastard was would dearly regret picking a fight.

Senses primed, Inuyasha watched and waited.

* * *

"Oh, would you hurry the hell up already?!"

"P-p-please! I’m going as fast as I can. I beg of you, don’t hurt my family!"

Jakotsu rolled his eyes and resumed his pacing. He was more annoyed at that damn Renkotsu than anything else. He had sent a Saimyoushou to his aniki, asking where he was and whether he could fix Jakotsutou. The response Renkotsu had sent was, ‘Go hide in a hole for a while, Jakotsu. I’m busy, and I don’t need you interfering.’ Jakotsu wanted to tear his hair out just thinking about it. The nerve of that guy! _I just know he’s busy plotting against_ my _Inuyasha. I swear, if I don’t get to fight Inuyasha again, I’ll…I’ll…I’ll complain to oo-aniki!_

That sounded lame, even inside his head. But he had seldom dared to go against Renkotsu’s decisions, before or after their resurrection. There was something sinister about the guy that made Jakotsu uneasy around him. Even oo-aniki didn’t trust him completely.

Be that as it may, his aniki’s stubborn asshole-itry had put Jakotsu in a tough spot. Either ‘hide in a hole’ as Renkotsu-no-baka suggested, or find someone else to repair his Jakotsutou. He’d chosen the second option in the interest of getting back into the action as soon as possible. He’d been so _close_ to having his way with Inuyasha; the hanyou had been a hair’s breadth away from falling into his clutches. But though Jakotsu hated losing, perhaps there was an upside to these defeats. These teasing encounters might make the inevitable end result that much more enjoyable, once Inuyasha was finally his.

His pleasurable thoughts were interrupted by a sniffling child, the blacksmith’s snot-nosed brat curled up in a corner of the hut with his mother. Jakotsu sneered in disgust; the sooner he got out of this place, the better. He had promised the blacksmith that he would spare his family’s lives if he fixed Jakotsutou. And if the guy did a good enough job, he would keep his word. Probably.

Needing some fresh air, Jakotsu exited the hut and leaned against the outer wall. He sighed wistfully, watching the setting sun sink below the horizon. The blacksmith would likely be working long into the night. Jakotsutou was probably more complicated than anything he had ever fixed before, and the high stakes involved meant that he would want to be very careful. That was fine with Jakotsu, despite his earlier impatient outburst. If he could set out with a fully repaired sword at first light, he would be happy.

_Inuyasha…stay alive until I see you again, okay?_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – So that warning probably made you think that the NC content was going to be more severe than it actually was. Sorry about that, but with things like this I figure it’s best to play it safe and warn too much rather than too little.


	14. Fire and Metal

It began with the grating sound of metal spinning against metal. Then came five sharp _clicks_ in rapid succession, followed soon after by the sound of wood being cut. The first _thud_ of a felled tree impacting the earth had barely reached Inuyasha’s ears when the metal blades were upon him. Reacting quickly, he swatted the first three away with Tetsusaiga, then reversed his grip and smacked the other two in the opposite direction. His brief sense of satisfaction at having deflected the weapons out of his enemy’s reach dissipated almost immediately. For instead of losing their momentum and crashing to either side of him, as he’d anticipated, the flying saws looped back around toward their point of origination, clearing out even more trees in the process. The result was a wide swath of demolished woodland, an open space which would be ideal for the enemy’s ranged attacks. It also provided Inuyasha with his first glimpse at his opponent.

The hanyou was simultaneously fascinated and disgusted by what he saw. The description Yuu had given for Ginkotsu of the Shichinintai did not do this man justice. If he could still be called a man, that is. The term ‘monster’ would probably be more appropriate. From his grotesque face, more than half concealed by metal, to the vicious-looking claw-like appendage which covered what remained of his left arm, Ginkotsu appeared more machine than man. The most frightening thing about him, of course, was the neat row of five glistening saw blades on his back, still spinning in their holder.

"Gesh-sh-sh," Ginkotsu rumbled, in a high-pitched voice with a definite metallic quality to it. "Inuyasha, I’ve been looking for you."

"Ginkotsu," the hanyou replied coldly. "I’ll give you one chance. Walk away now, and I won’t have to slaughter you."

"Ge-he-he-heh," the metal man laughed. "Do you think I fear a half-breed? I will slice you and your friends into tiny pieces!"

Ginkotsu released the blades once more. Inuyasha parried the four directed at him, all the while keeping one eye on the fifth, which looped around in a shallow arc designed to come in behind him and decimate his three human friends. He darted back a couple steps and smashed this away as well, then turned to glare at Ginkotsu in fury.

"Fight me, you fucking coward! Leave them out of this."

"Gesh-sh-sh, let them die, and then we can fight to your heart’s content."

Ginkotsu deployed the saw blades again, this time with three coming down the middle and one looping around on either side. Inuyasha swore under his breath. This was bad. If his friends weren’t lying there helpless behind him, he thought he could take Ginkotsu. He was pretty sure he was quick enough to dodge or block the incoming blades and close the distance to fight hand-to-hand, or even just to free himself up for a moment to blow the bastard away with a Kaze no Kizu. But protecting the others had essentially rooted him in place and taken his speed out of the equation. Now he could only parry the blades; he didn’t dare dodge one which could hit his friends, nor could he move away and trust that Ginkotsu wouldn’t target them. Given their recent experiences with the Shichinintai, this sort of cowardly strategy came as no surprise to Inuyasha. But that didn’t make it any easier to deal with, especially with his still-healing wounds.

Fortunately, the timing of the attack was such that he was able to parry all five blades, starting with the three targeting him. But it was a near thing, so close that in his haste he didn’t quite swing Tetsusaiga with as much force as he should have, and one of the blades ricocheted off to catch him on the forearm. A superficial injury, to be sure, but such things had a tendency to compound over time if one was not careful.

This pattern continued for the next couple minutes, though it seemed much longer to Inuyasha, who was soon breathing heavily. His body was starting to look like it had at the conclusion of the battle against Jakotsu. Ginkotsu hadn’t managed to cut him deeply yet, but it was only a matter of time at this rate. The monster was slowly perfecting his timing, making it more and more difficult for Inuyasha to protect himself and his friends. He gave the latter priority, which naturally left his body to suffer when his defense wasn’t quite up to the task at hand. The worst part was the non-stop nature of the attacks; Ginkotsu kept the blades in the holder for less than a second after catching them, just long enough to reinvigorate the rotation and alter the timing and aim. It simply wasn’t enough time for Inuyasha to recover from his frantic parrying and launch a Kaze no Kizu.

Nevertheless, the hanyou knew he needed to do something. If he kept letting Ginkotsu wear him down like this, sooner or later he was going to take a serious hit, and then they would all die. Shippou and Kirara had not woken, leaving them and the humans still propped helplessly against the tree where he’d left them. The tree…

He dared a glance up at it, and was pleased by what he saw. The tree was old and thick, and its position on the hillside left it leaning slightly toward Ginkotsu. It was not much of a weapon, but sometimes you had to use what you had on hand. Inuyasha waited to make his move, until Ginkotsu filed a salvo which was not properly timed and relatively easy to block. That done, he leapt into the air and swung Tetsusaiga, chopping clean through the tree about two meters above his friends’ heads. He sliced laterally at a steep angle so the trunk would not come down on top of them. It slid off to the side as anticipated, following the path of the cut and plunging to the ground with a dull thud. Then gravity took over, the tree’s natural lean and the weight at the top pulling it to rapidly descend toward Ginkotsu.

The metal man was, to be sure, far enough away from the tree so that he personally was in no danger. But by the time he realized what was happening, he had already retracted his saw blades and deployed them again. Desperately he pulled them back, but it was too late; they were trapped and tangled by the descending tree’s bulk. It was the opening Inuyasha had been waiting for. He leapt up onto the fallen trunk, Tetsusaiga raised high above his head.

"Kaze no—what?!"

Inuyasha’s shocked exclamation resulted from the lowering of the gun barrel over Ginkotsu’s shoulder. Instinctively he killed his forward momentum and leapt back, just before the enemy fired. The blast rocked the battlefield, sending dirt and pieces of charred wood flying in all directions, and giving rise to a great cloud of dust which obscured the impact zone from view.

"Ge-he-he-heh, blown to bits, eh?" Ginkotsu observed smugly. He called his saw blades to return, and all did after struggling out from under the fallen tree’s branches. One had been crushed and bent out of shape, so he cut the wire and set it aside. Renkotsu-no-aniki could fix it later, and he still had four usable ones. Not that he would need the blades to finish Inuyasha off anyway, even if the hanyou had somehow survived the explosion. No, his sword or even his foot would suffice for that grim task, as well as disposing of the poisoned humans under his protection. _That’s what they get for relying on a half-breed._ Cackling, Ginkotsu stalked forward to complete his victory.

Inuyasha lay face-down in the dirt, fighting to retain consciousness. The shell from the gun had not struck him directly, thanks to his quick reflexes. As a result, his body remained in one piece. But unfortunately, the blast had been close enough to knock him backwards and rattle his brain, the shock wave ripping open every wound he had suffered this day. Blood soaked through his clothing and stained the ground underneath him. His healing abilities were working hard to save his life, and given enough time, he was sure they would. But time was one thing he did not have. He had to rise and continue fighting, or his friends would die. Deep down he knew this was futile; even if he did manage to stagger to his feet, Ginkotsu would cut him down without mercy. Sudden despair weighed him down, tempting him to surrender to oblivion, just to make his failure easier to bear.

Sudden warmth flooded his chest, pervading his mind. Dark and feral, his youkai essence enveloped him in a brutal heat, urging him to surrender to a different kind of oblivion. His clawed hands twitched, as a powerful bloodlust sent wicked tingles throughout his body. Still his mind resisted, even as a low, animal growl began to emanate from his throat. He had managed to control himself the last time he transformed, during the battle against Ryuukotsusei, but then he had been alone. None of his friends had been especially near to him. And he wasn’t sure he could stop himself this time. What good was killing Ginkotsu if he slaughtered his friends afterward, then went on a killing spree until a stronger opponent finally took him down? If there was anything worse than letting all of them simply die here, that was it.

Then he felt it, a new kind of urge, faint but rising from deep within. Protectiveness. His youkai side was still driven predominantly by bloodlust, but it was no longer completely indiscriminate. He sensed the natural instinct to protect one’s offspring, and a recognition of mate and pack which he had never before experienced in this state. If there were innocent humans around, people who he would never kill as a hanyou but were not ‘pack,’ then he would still have reason to resist. But there weren’t, and what he was sensing from his youkai side seemed to alleviate most of his concerns. And since he had no other way to save everyone, he allowed himself to fall into the seductive warmth wholeheartedly.

Ginkotsu froze in his tracks at the pulse of youki, so strong and savage that even a human like him could feel it. Another followed, then another. The dust from the explosion gradually cleared, until finally two glowing red eyes became visible, shining through the haze like fiery beacons. Within moments, the rest of Inuyasha’s battered and bloodied form materialized. Covered in blood as he was, and with oversized fangs bared in a vicious smirk, he looked like a monster sent from the very depths of hell.

"Gesh-sh-sh, Inuyasha, you bastard. How are you still alive? No matter; carving you up will be more fun this way!"

Ginkotsu released his four remaining saw blades, all aimed at Inuyasha from different angles to make it nearly impossible for the hanyou to dodge them all. To his horror, Inuyasha only smirked wider. In a series of movements which seemed like a blur to Ginkotsu’s human eyes, the youkai before him dodged or swatted away all of his blades with ease. The last he smashed into the ground hard enough to dent the metal. Then he cut the wire with a swipe of his claws and picked up the wide circular blade in both hands. The tortured groaning of metal rang out, as Inuyasha slowly bent the blade, twisting it into an unrecognizable shape before casually tossing it aside. Ginkotsu could only stare, at a loss for words.

"Heh, Ginkotsu," Inuyasha snarled, still with that malicious smile firmly in place. "Earlier you said you weren’t afraid of a ‘half-breed.’ How about now?"

Ginkotsu’s response was to once more lower the barrel of his gun and fire a shell. But Inuyasha’s reaction was swift as lightning, and brutally aggressive. He darted forward, ducking so the shell passed harmlessly over his head, his powerful legs carrying him out of reach of the resulting explosion. Then he was upon his enemy, slashing and snarling. He sliced through the armour plating on Ginkotsu’s chest, plunging his hand deep inside to discover once and for all whether his enemy was man or machine. He was disappointed to find only gears and other metal parts, rather than warm entrails dripping with blood. Next he thrust his claws at the enemy’s face, aiming to see if Ginkotsu’s body could still function without his head.

Ginkotsu blocked the strike with his left arm, Inuyasha’s claws scraping viciously against the metal. He stumbled back, hounded relentlessly by the hanyou. More jagged holes appeared in his armour, inflicted by the snarling beast pursuing him, who showed no sign of stopping. If Inuyasha had his way, this battle would end when one of them was dead, and not before. Left with no other option, Ginkotsu employed a technique he’d never needed to utilize before, a true last resort. He twisted his body so that his left side was facing Inuyasha, then manipulated a hidden lever on his right hip. His left arm detached at the shoulder with a series of rapid _clicks_ , then shot toward the hanyou in a move powered by compressed air. The multi-pronged claw opened, presenting Inuyasha with a ring of sharp points soaring at him.

The hanyou-turned-youkai growled in annoyance, but caught the arm by two of the prongs and slammed it into the ground. He raised his head to glare at Ginkotsu, but the metal man was already in headlong retreat. This struck Inuyasha as odd, even in his youkai state; it was usually suicide to turn one’s back to an enemy. There was something funny going on here. The disturbing ticking noise coming from within the metal arm seemed to confirm this. Inuyasha’s mind was too clouded with bloodlust to understand why this turn of events filled him with fear, but he reacted instantly to it nonetheless. Fortunately so, for he had just barely managed to put a few meters of distance between himself and the arm before it exploded spectacularly, with a blast even greater than the previous two.

The crimson-eyed youkai picked himself off the ground, shaking his head to clear the ringing in his ears. Such a cheap trick—he wanted to massacre his enemy more than ever now. He spied Ginkotsu a fair distance off, plodding away as quickly as he could. Cracking his knuckles, Inuyasha rose to give chase. He froze with a baleful snarl, suddenly finding that his greatest challenge would come from within. The damn hanyou wanted to reclaim his sword and take care of his friends. He wanted to let that bastard Ginkotsu go. Fucking intolerable.

Trapped in a haze within himself, the true Inuyasha struggled with all his might. Ginkotsu was defeated, no longer a threat to his friends. But he could not say with any certainty that they were safe. Ginkotsu was a veritable bag of tricks; it would take at least a few minutes to catch him and kill him. Plenty of time for any other enemies hiding nearby to creep in and slit his friends’ throats. And they were all still poisoned; he needed to get them to a safe place to rest as soon as possible. If that meant letting Ginkotsu go for now, then so be it.

Of course, his youkai side didn’t see it that way. His body took one small step toward the retreating enemy, then another. But that was as far as he got. Bloodlust and protection warred in his mind, immobilizing his body with indecision until finally the latter began to win out. Turning around, Inuyasha managed to locate Tetsusaiga, lying on the ground the seemingly insurmountable distance of twenty meters away. Gritting his teeth, he took his first step.

Crossing that stretch of ground was the most grueling of tests, and taking those final half dozen steps was among the most difficult things he’d ever had to do. His youkai side was so tempting, so persuasive. After all, it experienced only pleasure. No sadness, pain, or doubt, only delight in the suffering and death of others. He was faster and stronger as a youkai. Tetsusaiga only held him back. As a youkai, he could protect his pack and make sure no harm ever came to them. They would never again be hurt because of a hanyou’s weakness. Everyone would be better off if he embraced the strong side of himself and did away with the weak, as he’d always dreamed. It seemed such a perfect argument, that he almost believed it. _But Kagome doesn’t love you as a youkai. She loves me as a hanyou._ Repeating this mantra over and over in his head, he reached for the sword.

The moment Inuyasha’s shaking hand closed around Tetsusaiga’s hilt was pure elation, an affirmation of true strength. His lungs heaved and he collapsed on his back, coughing uncontrollably. His body felt heavy, and his head throbbed with the effort of fighting a civil war with his own youkai side. But that was the price of surrendering to his dark lurker, even for a few moments. The benefits were obvious; he had managed to save himself and his friends from certain death. And his heightened youkai blood had done much to heal his wounds; he now figured he was in no worse shape than he’d been when the battle with Ginkotsu had started. The cost was teetering on a knife edge, coming within a hair’s breadth of losing himself. Inadvertently, Kagome had rescued him again, saved him from himself as she’d been doing ever since her arrival in the feudal era. It was funny how he could be so confident of her love for him, in its truest and most all-encompassing form, while locked in a mortal struggle with his youkai side. Now that he was fully in control of himself again, his rational mind remained as uncertain on that point as ever. But he could ruminate on the nonsensical nature of hanyou psychology later. Right now, he had more pressing concerns.

His tremendous efforts had paid off, he was pleased to discover; none of his friends had suffered so much as a scratch through the entire battle. He picked them up in the same manner as before, now doubly grateful for hiraikotsu. The bandages which had bound his left shoulder had been fairly well shredded, and being able to keep his arm extended downward instead of actively lifting weight in front of him helped to ease the strain. He wished he had thought to bring some extra bandages from Kagome’s bag, but there was no going back now. The battle with Ginkotsu had at least not taken very much time, so there was still plenty of daylight left.

After throwing a crazed, semi-human wrench at him, fate seemed to smile upon Inuyasha once again. Within a half hour, he came upon a large temple. If the monks within were in the mood to take in weary travelers, then this would be the perfect place for his companions to rest. The one thing which disturbed him was the smell of burnt flesh in the air. But this place deserved to be checked out at least. He crept silently up the steps, keeping to the shadows of the entranceway when he reached the top. To his surprise, the temple appeared almost completely deserted. The only person he could see was a monk, digging in the dirt off to the side of one of the main buildings. The smell of burnt flesh seemed to be coming predominantly from that direction, so perhaps he was burying some remains. But most importantly, Inuyasha could detect no sign of the Shichinintai in the area. Finally, he deemed it safe to emerge from his hiding place.

"Oi," he called out as he approached. The monk turned and regarded him kindly enough. He appeared to be a typical holy man, wearing yellow and purple robes, with an angular face below a completely shaved head. Inuyasha could detect nothing out of the ordinary about him, but he was not in an especially trusting mood at the moment. He would keep his eye on this monk, just in case.

"Welcome," the monk greeted warmly, in a soft-spoken voice. "I am the priest of this temple." Then he craned his neck to the side to get a better look at the humans on Inuyasha’s back. "Your companions look ill."

"Poisoned."

"Ah, I see. Well, bring them inside. There is little I can do about the poison, but we can at least make them comfortable."

Inuyasha followed as the monk led them toward a large building, senses alert for a trap. But none was forthcoming, and he allowed himself to relax just a little once Kagome, Sango, and Miroku were safely tucked into futons under a sturdy roof. With any luck, he would not need to move them again until they had recovered. The monk sat down in front of him, looking like he wanted to have a conversation. Inuyasha groaned inwardly, but resolved not to be rude to their host. The guy had done him a favor by welcoming them, not that he would have left even if the holy man had told him to.

"Are you being pursued?" the monk inquired.

Inuyasha thought about responding with something arrogant like ‘we’re not being pursued; we’re _pursuing_ ,’ but in the end he couldn’t muster the false bravado.

"Yeah, we are."

"By the Shichinintai?"

Inuyasha glared sharply at the other man, hand drifting down to Tetsusaiga’s hilt. "How the hell did you know?"

The monk sighed. "I feared as much. There have been rumors going around that the Shichinintai have been resurrected. I returned to this temple yesterday to find everyone burned alive, likely by one of those undead mercenaries. Now I am the only priest left."

Inuyasha felt a pang of sympathy for the man. "Keh. Just be glad you weren’t here. If you ever meet one of the Shichinintai, run away. Someone like you wouldn’t be able to handle them."

"If the rumors of them are true, I believe you are right. Tell me, do you have any idea why they were resurrected?"

"It was a youkai named Naraku who did it. He gave them shards of the Shikon no Tama, which brought them back to life."

"Ah, I have heard rumors of this Naraku as well. They say he is a great evil."

"Keh! Nasty bastard. I almost killed him the last time we met, would have if my asshole brother hadn’t interfered."

"Is that why you are here, to find and destroy Naraku?"

"Yeah, he’s hiding himself around here somewhere, reconstructing his body from when I tore it up last time. He’s probably using the Shichinintai as a shield to keep his enemies from finding him until he’s ready."

"Hmm…so then the Shichinintai are just being used by Naraku. As soon as Naraku has recovered, he will likely seek to reclaim the shards of the Shikon no Tama which he gave to them?"

"Keh. ‘Course he will. Naraku’s always wanted to get his grubby hands on the whole jewel. Can’t do that if he lets the Shichinintai keep pieces of it."

"True enough, true enough," the monk muttered, staring into space for a moment. Then he came back to himself and stood to leave. "Well, I am off to complete my duties. If there is anything I can do for your companions, please let me know."

"Thanks," Inuyasha told him sincerely. The monk bowed and left.

Inuyasha took a few minutes to check on his friends. Their condition was about the same as it had been a few hours ago. They hadn’t gotten much worse, but of course this also meant that they weren’t recovering. They were still hovering just on the right side of death, a dangerous place to be. One push in the wrong direction… But no, he wouldn’t allow that to happen. _Nothing_ was going to get anywhere near his friends, at least while he was still breathing. He settled against a wall to keep watch, senses attuned to monitor his companions and the outside world.

Shippou began to stir perhaps twenty minutes later, groaning in the early throes of wakefulness. Seeing this, Inuyasha poked Kirara in the side. She also stirred, so he placed the drowsy feline in his lap and scratched her head as he knew she liked. Shippou sat up holding his head, blinking his eyes blearily.

"How ya feelin’, runt? It’s about freakin’ time you woke up."

"Ugh, my head hurts. Inuyasha, where are we?" he asked, looking around.

"A temple. You remember what happened?"

Shippou thought for a moment, an action which looked physically painful for him. "I remember flying on Kirara…did I get poisoned?"

"Everyone did," Inuyasha answered somberly, motioning to their human companions.

"Kagome! Sango! Miroku!" the frightened kitsune shouted, hopping over to each of them in turn.

"Don’t shake them!" Inuyasha ordered, snatching Shippou by the tail and depositing him in his lap next to Kirara, who was now wide awake and staring at the humans in concern. "That only makes the poison spread faster."

Shippou’s bottom lip started to tremble, but he bit down on it and attempted to hold in his tears. Inuyasha was glad; the last thing he wanted to deal with was a blubbering child. At least the kid was trying to be brave like a man.

"H-h-how are they?" Shippou stuttered.

"Fine, for now. I gave them an antidote for poison…but they didn’t get any better."

"What did you give them?"

Inuyasha grimaced, praying that Shippou wasn’t about to tell him that he’d screwed up the recipe. When he was finished his explanation, however, the kit only nodded in approval.

"You actually got everything right. I’m impressed."

Inuyasha’s eyes narrowed; he didn’t like Shippou’s tone. "Impressed that I got it right, or shocked that I didn’t fuck it up?"

"Uh…same difference, right?"

"Why you little—"

"Ah! Wait, I know another antidote too!"

Inuyasha’s fist paused in mid-air. "You do?"

"Y-yeah, for some poisons it works better than the one you made. I’ll go gather the ingredients right now," Shippou declared, seemingly ecstatic to be able to help in some way.

"I’ll go with you," Inuyasha told him.

"No, stay here with the others in case…well, just in case. I know exactly what I’m looking for. Kirara will come with me, right Kirara?"

The fire-cat mewed and bounded toward the door, leaving Shippou to scurry along in her wake. Inuyasha frowned, not liking the idea of the two of them going off by themselves. But there was nothing for it; the risk was necessary if Shippou’s antidote could help the others. And the kitsune was right about him staying here with the humans. Just in case an enemy showed up, or just in case of that other thing he didn’t want to think about…

A half hour later, Shippou and Kirara had still not returned, and Inuyasha was starting to worry. He leaned against the doorway with his arms crossed, tapping his foot impatiently. The kindly monk was meditating on the porch of the building across from him. Everything seemed peaceful, but the hairs on the back of his neck were standing on end. Something wasn’t right. Then he realized what it was—the birds, which had previously been chirping merrily, had gone deathly silent. Then came the smell, corpse and graveyard dirt tinged with oil and gunpowder. Ginkotsu had returned.

"Dammit!" Inuyasha roared as he charged to meet the stubborn foe. He had to finish the bastard off before he got close enough to use those saw blades or his gun on the unconscious humans in the temple. The grounds were rocked by an explosion, as Ginkotsu collapsed the entrance structure with a shell. Inuyasha leapt over it and landed on the top step, facing down his opponent with Tetsusaiga raised.

"Ginkotsu! You just don’t know when to quit, do you, bastard?"

"Gesh-sh-sh, Inuyasha. I told you, I don’t fear half-breeds. You surprised me last time. It won’t happen again."

Ginkotsu released his saw blades, and Inuyasha charged down the steps to meet them. He smirked, knowing the outcome would be very different this time, since he had two crucial details working in his favor. First, there was no one in the immediate area who he had to worry about protecting. Second, Ginkotsu only had three saw blades left, instead of five. One he blocked aside and the other two he dodged with ease, sending them soaring harmlessly past.

"Did you honestly think," he cried, raising Tetsusaiga to deliver the killing blow, "that shit would work on me again?!"

"Ge-he-he-heh," Ginkotsu chuckled.

Inuyasha dodged automatically, as a shell blasted a gaping hole in the steps where he’d just been. His ears alerted him to new danger, and he turned just in time to block a saw blade coming at him from behind. Then he had to dart away as Ginkotsu fired another shell, having apparently realized that his gun was his best weapon against the speedy hanyou, now no longer hindered by vulnerable companions. But Inuyasha was unconcerned; he still had the advantages of mobility and strength. Even with explosives and sharp metal flying at him continuously, it was only a matter of time before an opening presented itself.

It did, when Ginkotsu accidently allowed one of the saw blades to get caught in the blast from a shell, throwing it off course. Inuyasha turned deftly into the opening and charged. He had to duck the frantic swing of a great axe, but then swung Tetsusaiga laterally and separated Ginkotsu’s torso from his legs. Both pieces careened backwards, landing in a jumbled heap of twisted metal.

"Gesh-sh-sh, you bastard."

"Keh," Inuyasha snorted, raising Tetsusaiga to deliver a Kaze no Kizu which would turn Ginkotsu into scrap metal. An unmistakable odor assaulted his nose at that moment, the acrid scent of smoke. _A fire? Kagome!_ His enemy forgotten, Inuyasha turned to sprint back to the temple and froze at the sight which greeted him at the top of the steps.

"Kukuku, Inuyasha, you seem surprised to see me like this," the kindly monk observed, referring to his evil grin and the fiery purple markings now adorning his cheeks. "What’s the matter? Did your senses fail you?"

It took all of two seconds for everything to fall into place for Inuyasha. The monk was a member of the Shichinintai, likely Renkotsu, the fire user. He had probably killed the real monks and put on their robes, using that and the smell of graveyard soil which surrounded this place to mask his scent. Then he had lulled Inuyasha into letting his guard down and leaving his friends defenseless once Ginkotsu showed up. If they weren’t already dead, they were probably inside that burning building right now, roasting alive.

Without a word, Inuyasha kicked off the step and launched himself toward Renkotsu. He didn’t care what tricks the bastard had up his sleeves; he would burst through them or die trying. Then from behind, a large metal chain wrapped around Tetsusaiga and pulled him to a stop. Before he could react, flaming wires came down on him from above, entangling his limbs. Trapped in a raging inferno, he could move neither up nor down.

"We can’t let you pass, Inuyasha," Renkotsu taunted. "Your friends are going to die, either by my fire or from Mukotsu’s poison. So you can perish here and precede them to the afterlife. Ginkotsu!"

"Gesh-sh-sh, goodbye, Inuyasha."

The hanyou didn’t need to look to know that Ginkotsu was aiming his gun. But Renkotsu’s words had filled his heart with renewed determination. His friends were alive. There was still time to save him. A savage snarl tore from his throat, his muscles flexing against his bonds as the powder inside the gun barrel ignited. He snatched up the blazing wires in his left hand and pulled with all his might, with so much brute force that even a shard-enhanced human stood no chance of holding him back. He used the resulting downward momentum to carry himself away from the blast zone. The shell exploded over his shoulder, showering him with debris. Off balance, partially blinded by smoke and disoriented by the detonation, and with his left hand badly scorched, Inuyasha nevertheless unleased a one-handed Kaze no Kizu with a great cry.

He didn’t know if he succeeded in killing Ginkotsu. He heard an agonized shriek, and the sounds of metal being rent and torn asunder, but he had no time to check visually. He did not even allow himself the slight delay required to kill Renkotsu, as he returned to the temple with every ounce of speed he could squeeze from his injured and exhausted legs.

What he saw chilled his blood. The entire building where his friends were resting was ablaze, already collapsing in on itself. It was a conflagration no human could survive. His heart ready to shatter, he sprinted toward the burning building, hoping against hope for a miracle.

* * *

Shippou sniffled and squinted his eyes shut, desperately trying to hold back his tears. He was reaching his limit; he couldn’t keep this up much longer. _Is this all you can do? Is this the limit of your power?_ Kirara nuzzled him in encouragement, but it was no use. If help didn’t come soon, they were all going to die. _Inuyasha, where are you?_

He had been returning to the temple with the ingredients for his antidote when he caught the scent of smoke. He and Kirara immediately rushed to the temple, only to find the building where their friends were resting on fire. Upon going inside, he discovered to his horror that all three humans were still there, and Inuyasha was nowhere to be found. With the path to the outside world rapidly becoming blocked by flames and falling debris, Shippou had scrambled for a way to save them and eventually come up with using his kitsune-bi. The blue flames would keep the real fire at bay, for as long as he could maintain it.

Of course, the kitsune-bi would not prevent them from being crushed by falling beams. That unfortunate task fell to Kirara. The fire-cat shrieked in pain as she caught the heavy piece of timber with her back. And suddenly Shippou was unsure which would give out first, his strength or Kirara’s.

Then came a sound which was music to Shippou’s ears—Inuyasha’s muffled cursing, followed by repeated grunts of exertion. The hanyou was making his way through!

"Inuyasha, in here! Hurry!"

"Hang on, Shippou! Fuck!"

The cursing and grunting intensified, growing in volume as Inuyasha’s efforts drew nearer to fruition. Then Shippou saw him, a wild creature tearing through burning wood, flinging aside tree-sized chunks of timber as if they were nothing. Heedless of the fire and heat he plowed on, the glint in his eye one of savage desperation. Shippou found himself in awe. Inuyasha had burns all over his body, wherever skin was exposed. His hair was blackened in places, and dark blood dripped down his left arm onto the floor whenever he moved. Yet still he pushed his body to the limits, ignoring or even embracing the pain as he single-mindedly fought to save those he held dear.

Shippou felt pride swell within him. If Inuyasha would give so much, how could he do any less? And so he vowed, that he would die before allowing his kitsune-bi to be extinguished. The blue flames would protect his friends until his final breath had left his lungs, and his heart stopped beating. Fortunately, Inuyasha reached him well before his situation became that desperate. But it was still by far the longest he’d ever maintained his kitsune-bi, and he felt a sense of grim satisfaction that he had done all he could. The solemn nod Inuyasha passed him was from one man to another.

Rather than going back the way he had come, Inuyasha simply tore apart the nearest wall. Then he somehow carried all three humans out at once, not stopping until he had laid them safely in the courtyard of the temple. Only then did he sink to his knees and give in to the coughing fit which gripped his burned and bloodied form for the better part of a minute. Knowing he could do nothing for Inuyasha, Shippou checked on the others. What he discovered brought fresh tears to his eyes, a few rogue droplets sliding down his cheeks. But he was a man; he would not cry. No matter what happened, he would not cry.

"Inuyasha…they’re b-barely breathing."

"I know. Fuck!"

Inuyasha eyes watered as he continued coughing. Normally smoke didn’t bother him so much, but his body was pretty beat up right now. Not that he cared. If Kagome and the others died, nothing else mattered. _Dammit! If only I’d figured out who Renkotsu was. How could I have trusted him?!_

"They need another antidote," Shippou sobbed, seemingly on the verge of a breakdown. "But I—I—"

"It’s okay, Shippou," Inuyasha told him, realizing what had happened. "It’s not your fault."

And it wasn’t. Shippou had seen the building on fire and forgotten all about the ingredients he had gathered, which had probably been incinerated or blown away in the wind. Inuyasha couldn’t blame him for that.

"You saved everyone from being burned alive, Shippou."

That seemed to raise the kitsune’s spirits slightly, though his bottom lip still quivered. The kit was trying to be brave, but if this went south, Inuyasha knew there were going to be some serious waterworks. Again, not that he would blame Shippou. Hell, he might even join in.

But all was not lost yet. He had an idea. A brilliant, _insane_ idea. What Kagome and the others really needed was an antidote from the creator of the poison, Mukotsu himself. That was obviously impossible since Mukotsu was dead. But perhaps he could get them the next best thing.

"Stay here, Shippou," he ordered, rising to his feet.

"Where are you going?"

Inuyasha lips twisted into a dark, predatory grimace.

"Hunting."

* * *

Renkotsu sighed unhappily. _This is so undignified_. He was referring, of course, to the way the two Saimyoushou were carrying him by his robes. They fluttered a half dozen meters above the ground at a slow pace, though it was faster than he could run. This he grudgingly admitted might be very important, especially if a vengeful Inuyasha decided to pursue the man responsible for his friends’ deaths. He actually wished they could go faster, but the little insects could only do so much while bearing his body weight. About a dozen of them had shown up a few minutes after Inuyasha left, but most had been needed to carry what remained of Ginkotsu. It was truly amazing that the metal man could still be repaired when reduced to barely more than head and shoulders. Renkotsu didn’t mind, since he genuinely enjoyed the task of rebuilding him. He was already coming up with new ideas. Maybe something with wheels or treads…

It happened so fast. One moment, he was hovering comfortably in the air. The next he was falling, alongside little bits of shredded wing and exoskeleton. A tremendous impact came from the side, a crimson blur which bore him to the ground and slammed him up against a tree. As his head stopped spinning, the indistinct splotch of gold across his vision solidified into the molten eyes of his hanyou pursuer, glimmering with murderous intent. And just when he was wondering why Inuyasha hadn’t killed him yet, the hanyou spoke.

"I just have one question, Renkotsu. Give me a straight answer or I’ll rip your fucking throat out. Can you make an antidote to Mukotsu’s poison?"

Renkotsu’s mind slowed to a crawl. So Inuyasha…wasn’t here to kill him? He laughed, a cruel, mirthless sound, until the hanyou slammed his head against the tree again.

"Answer me, dammit!"

"So, Inuyasha, your friends survived the fire, but are now lying on death’s door due to the poison. Does that about sum it up?"

"If you understand, then you know that your answer is the only thing keeping me from tearing you to pieces."

"Hm, true enough. Very well then, I suppose I shan’t make you wait any longer. Yes. Yes, I can prepare an antidote for Mukotsu’s poison. I do not know all of his secrets, but I have—"

"Good. Let’s fucking go then!"

"Wait a moment!"

"What the fuck is it?"

"Just the matter of my compensation."

Deathly silence descended upon the area, as Inuyasha glowered dangerously at his captive. "Your _what?_ " he snarled in a low voice.

"My compensation," Renkotsu replied, seemingly unconcerned by the hanyou’s ire. "In common speech, what do I get for helping you?"

"How about getting to walk out of here with your head still attached?!"

"That is not enough."

"Why you—"

"Inuyasha, if what you said about Naraku is true, then my days are numbered no matter what happens today. I require something from you which will help me defend myself against my ‘benefactor’ when the time comes. I require your shards of the Shikon no Tama."

Inuyasha growled viciously, lifting Renkotsu off the ground by his robes. "Maybe you don’t get it. If you don’t help me, I’m going to tear out your intestines and strangle you with them. Take that offer or fucking leave it."

"Then I refuse. If I fail to obtain the jewel shards, I might as well be dead already."

Renkotsu could tell how much that response shocked the hanyou. But he was not bluffing. This was a contest of wills, one he knew he would win, for the simple reason that Inuyasha had a lot more to lose than he did. And when the hanyou unleashed a torrent of cursing which would put even the most hardened soldier to shame, Renkotsu took a moment to revel in his victory.

"Fine, you bastard," Inuyasha snapped when he was finished swearing. "I’ll give you the shards when Kagome and the others wake up."

"That will not be necessary. I have already taken them, you see." Renkotsu could tell that Inuyasha was about to launch another tirade, so he hastily added, "How I came to possess the shards is merely semantics. What matters is whether you agree to my terms. Do we have a deal?"

Inuyasha nodded brusquely, now apparently too disgusted to speak. Renkotsu smirked. Could he have simply walked away with the jewel shards without mentioning them? Probably; the odds were low that the hanyou would have noticed. But there was always the chance of discovery. And if Inuyasha had found that the jewel shards were missing _after_ his friends were awake, that might’ve spelled disaster. You had to get a good guy, ‘man of his word’ type like Inuyasha to agree to everything up front. And now that the terms were fully accepted, he was ready to set out. He only hoped that the humans were still clinging to life by the time he walked all the way back to the temple.

But Inuyasha had other ideas, as Renkotsu was disappointed to discover. If being carried around by the Saimyoushou was undignified, this was _intolerable_. If any of his companions saw him like this, he would never live it down. To think that he, the great fire-user Renkotsu, would be thrown over a hanyou’s shoulder like a sack of produce! And ass backwards no less! To make matters worse, Inuyasha didn’t seem to care if he got hit in some ‘tender areas’ by the occasional tree branch. Renkotsu swore the bastard was doing it on purpose. _That’s fine, Inuyasha. Have your fun. I will survive this. I am going to walk out of that temple with my life, and all of your shards of the Shikon no Tama. And all I have to do for you is save a few pathetic humans._

Oh, yes, it was quite obvious who was getting the better end of that deal. _Ow! Damn, that stings!_

* * *

Forty minutes later, they were ready. Renkotsu had gathered his ingredients from a hidden storehouse in one of the other buildings. Of course, the bastard had known beforehand that Shippou was going to hunt for some items, most of which could be found in said storehouse, and hadn’t said anything. But Inuyasha would forgive that little ‘oversight’ if Kagome and the others survived.

"Inuyasha, I feel that I should reiterate what I was trying to tell you before. Mukotsu was a master of poisons. I am not. I cannot be certain that this antidote I have prepared will work."

"If they die, so do you," Inuyasha replied evenly. "You can ask Mukotsu how to make the right antidote when you see him in hell."

Renkotsu chuckled nervously at that. "Fair enough. So, who shall do the honors?"

"All of us at once," Inuyasha said, not wishing there to be any delay in getting the antidote into any of their systems. Nodding, Renkotsu separated the potion into three cups.

"Make sure they drink every last drop," he advised, moving to sit beside the closest of the unconscious humans, which happened to be Miroku. Shippou gingerly carried his cup over to Sango, and Inuyasha naturally took custody over Kagome. He watched Renkotsu for a moment, and was satisfied that the mercenary was taking proper care with Miroku, so as to not make him choke. Then he turned to his own task, gently lifting Kagome’s head off the pillow and ever so slowly beginning to feed her the antidote.

She didn’t like the taste; that much was obvious. Her eyes would scrunch up every time it touched her tongue, and her throat didn’t want to swallow. But Inuyasha was the living embodiment of patience, and over the next ten minutes he tenderly coaxed her into draining the entire cup. When she was finished, he raised his head to regard Renkotsu and Shippou, who had both completed the task about a minute ago and were watching him. He might’ve been embarrassed at the scrutiny if he wasn’t so worried.

"So what now?" he demanded.

"Now, we wait," Renkotsu replied, sitting back against a wall and closing his eyes. Inuyasha did the same, with Shippou and Kirara settling in his lap as before. The kitsune was shaking, his face unnaturally pale, his bright green eyes dilated. Inuyasha wondered how the kid had managed to feed the potion to Sango, but not a drop had been spilled. He sensed that this was more than merely fear that his friends would die. No, this went deeper. Shippou’s eyes were haunted, as if past and future were melding miserably into one.

Inuyasha was not a man of many words. He found that sometimes actions just worked better. So when he put his hand on Shippou’s head and ruffled his hair affectionately, drawing the kitsune’s gaze, he willed his feelings to be clear. _No matter what happens, kid, you’re with me. I won’t let you be alone again._ Shippou’s eyes watered and his bottom lip set to trembling again, but he sniffled and held back his tears. He did finally relax, however, slumping tiredly against the hanyou as he resumed his watch over his friends. Inuyasha wrapped his arm around the kit, enfolding him in the sleeve of his haori, receiving as much comfort from the action as he gave.

Over the next several hours, as afternoon turned to dusk and finally to night, something magical happened. It was gradual, almost painfully so, but over time Kagome, Sango, and Miroku began to improve. Their breathing became stronger, until finally they appeared to be simply sleeping deeply rather than deathly ill. Some color returned to their skin, replacing the disturbing pallor. For the first time since they were poisoned, Inuyasha felt real optimism. But he would not allow himself to truly rejoice until they woke up, and it was several more grueling hours before any of them showed signs of waking. Finally, at around midnight, Kagome groaned in her sleep and fluttered her eyes open.

The first thing she saw, when her vision focused, was the beautiful face of her hanyou gazing down at her. His mouth was slightly agape with awe, his eye wide and shining, like a child receiving a wonderful gift. It was as though seeing her wake up was the most amazing thing that had ever happened to him. His hand hesitantly cupped her cheek, as if to verify that she was really there. She leaned into his touch, drawing comfort from the warmth of his palm. She felt incredibly crappy right now, but this was nice.

Shippou tried to contain himself so as to not ruin the romantic mood, he really did. But soon youthful exuberance won out.

"Kagome! Kagome! Kagome!" he cried, flinging himself onto her chest and putting his face so close to hers that she had to go cross-eyed to look at him.

"Hi, Shippou-chan," she managed.

"Oi, oi," Inuyasha grumped, reaching to swat the kit off of her. But Shippou was already gone, poking and prodding Sango and Miroku into wakefulness. Inuyasha scowled, but Kagome favored him with a wry smile, and his annoyance was swiftly forgotten.

"Inuyasha, they’re all okay!" Shippou exclaimed when all of the humans were awake.

"Indeed they are," Renkotsu observed, rising to his feet and dusting off his robes. "I guess that means I get to live."

"I guess it does," Inuyasha admitted.

"Well, then I’m glad I judged you correctly, Inuyasha. You are indeed a man of your word. And so I shall give you mine. It will take several days for your friends to recover fully, but they will recover. They would not have regained consciousness if the poison was not working its way out of their bodies."

"Good. Now get the hell out of here."

"Kukuku, fair enough."

Inuyasha followed him out, across the temple grounds and to the top of the steps. "I’ll make you an offer, Renkotsu," the hanyou said, knowing it was probably futile but feeling the need to try. "Give those jewel shards back and run away from this area, and I’ll promise not to kill you."

Renkotsu grinned. "A generous offer, but I believe I will take my chances."

"Suit yourself. But I will kill you the next time I see you."

"I would expect nothing less. Sayonara, Inuyasha."

"Keh. Tell your buddies that if they’re thinking about attacking me here, I’ll be waiting. If they’re smart, they’ll know not to fuck with me right now."

Renkotsu studied the hanyou for a moment, then departed. He liked to think that at least some of the members of the Shichinintai were smart, with him of course being the most intelligent. He took a quick rundown of the state of the Shichinintai. Kyoukotsu: dead. Mukotsu: also dead. Jakotsu: out of action with a broken sword. Ginkotsu: out of commission until he could be rebuilt. Suikotsu: unknown. Honestly, who the hell knew when Suikotsu would wake up? The last he’d heard, that damn doctor had still been clinging to existence. Really, the only ones capable of fighting at the moment were himself and Bankotsu, and he wasn’t sure even oo-aniki could take Inuyasha in a one-on-one duel.

So yes, it would probably be wise for the Shichinintai to regroup and come up with a new strategy before engaging Inuyasha’s group again. The piecemeal attacks they’d been making so far were clearly not working. And beyond that, he had never seen anyone fight as desperately as Inuyasha had today. The hanyou was like an animal, and everyone knew that animals were at their most dangerous when cornered.

* * *

Inuyasha inhaled deeply, then let the tension ebb from his chest as he gazed up at the night sky. The stars seemed especially brilliant tonight, like a thousand tiny lights shining just for him. He suspected much of that feeling had to do with the girl slumbering his arms. Would she have been better off inside with the others instead of out here with him? Probably. But this was for him; he needed this.

They were sitting on the roof of the building which would serve as their home until Kagome, Sango, and Miroku were well again. It was not as large as the room Renkotsu had tried to turn into their funeral pyre, but crucially it had mostly escaped the blaze. All three of them had been sleeping again by the time he returned from escorting Renkotsu out. Shippou had nodded off shortly thereafter, exhausted by the events of the day. But peace evaded Inuyasha. He wouldn’t allow himself to truly sleep, since he was the best defense his friends had in this decidedly hostile land. Normally he would doze off periodically to at least rest his eyes, but every time he closed them, they would snap open again a few moments later, his heart racing. And each time, he found himself checking on Kagome, making sure she was really alive. Confirming that her tranquil slumber was only temporary, and not eternal. Eventually, he’d gotten to the point where he couldn’t take it anymore. Knowing there was only one thing that was going to help him relax, he gingerly placed Shippou in Sango’s futon and took Kagome, bedding and all, up to the roof.

Now he sat, in the wee hours of the morning, trying to come to terms with reality. He looked down at Kagome’s peaceful face, serene in slumber. She’d stirred when he’d moved her before, but had not awoken. Part of him wished for her to open her eyes, but he dared not deprive her of the rest she needed. Left to his own devices, however, his mind wandered. How close had he come to losing her? All of his strength, all of his immense power, had nearly not been enough. Yes, he’d fought frantically, given everything he had in order to save her and the others. Yet still, their survival would not have been possible without incredibly good luck. Any number of miniscule variations of chance could have spelled doom. That was how close he’d come to losing her. But he hadn’t lost her. Kagome was _alive_. Their baby was _alive_ , its heartbeat strong and regular. They were going to be okay.

A burning sensation began behind his eyelids, growing in intensity until finally he was forced to squeeze his eyes shut. When he opened them again, his vision was blurred. Not quite believing what was happening, he reached up with his hand and felt the moisture pooling on his cheeks. Growling in annoyance, he sniffed once and subconsciously tightened his hold on Kagome.

Why on earth was he crying? Kagome was okay, wasn’t she? If she hadn’t made it, then he wouldn’t have been shocked to shed tears. But he’d never understood this ‘crying with happiness’ bullshit. Men didn’t do that. It made no sense, anyway. Why get all emotional when something good happened? Just be happy! But try as he might, he could not stop his tears, which were undoubtedly borne of joy rather than sorrow. He was glad no one was around to witness his moment of weakness.

"Inu…yasha?"

He cursed under his breath. Evidently he’d squeezed Kagome a bit too hard. He turned his head away, but it didn’t take a genius to figure out that he was crying like a pathetic child. He was fully intent on pretending not to notice her state of wakefulness until he’d gotten himself under control. Then her hand cupped his cheek, gently but firmly turning him to face her.

One look into her eyes, and he realized how foolish he was being. Kagome would never view such an emotional display as a sign of weakness. To the contrary, she would see it as a sign of strength that he was able to feel as intensely as he did. She was smiling at him now, conveying without words how proud she was, how honored she felt. Because she more than anyone knew how difficult it was for him to reveal his true feelings at times. She understood. And even with the moonlight highlighting the paleness of her skin and the dark bags under her eyes, she was the most beautiful creature he had ever laid eyes upon. He couldn’t help himself. He kissed her, desperately at first, then more languidly. The very touch of her lips buoyed his spirits, lightened his heart. Kagome wasn’t going anywhere; she was staying by his side where she belonged.

With as lousy as she felt, Kagome could do little more than lie back and let Inuyasha take what he needed. Even though the kiss only lasted a few short seconds, it was still enough to set her heart aflutter and make her head swim. When it was over, she closed her eyes and leaned more fully into his embrace, a contented grin firmly in place. Time crept slowly by, the rise and fall of Inuyasha’s chest and the rhythmic sounds of the night lulling her back to sleep.

"Sorry," Inuyasha said suddenly, jolting her awake once more.

"For what?" she inquired groggily, to which he gave her an incredulous look. She almost laughed at the amusing sense of déjà vu which struck her, but was glad she’d managed to restrain herself.

"Don’t be. I’m not," she told him. She’d meant for her voice to carry a certain sensual quality, but that was hard when even saying a few words left you short of breath. "But I thought that…you didn’t want to do that sort of thing anymore," she admitted.

"You almost died," he replied grimly, as if that was enough of a reason to break his unspoken vow to keep his distance from her. And perhaps it was.

"How…how close was I?" she asked.

"Close."

Kagome digested that for a moment, observing the sudden haunted look in Inuyasha’s eyes and resolving to banish it.

"You saved us, Inuyasha. Thank you."

"Keh. Don’t thank me. I let all of you get poisoned and almost burned alive."

"None of that was your fault. We’re all okay, thanks to you."

He didn’t respond, but she could tell that his mood had improved. That accomplished, she let her mind wander back to see how much memory she could recover. Not much, unfortunately. Or perhaps that was a good thing, since she couldn’t recall anything about the fire which had apparently almost killed her. The one thread she did remember caused her to frown in consternation.

"Hey, Inuyasha?"

"Yeah?"

"That bald guy…was he a member of the Shichinintai?"

"Yep."

"And…you know he walked out of here with our jewel shards, right?"

Inuyasha sighed. "It’s a long story, wench."

"Tell me tomorrow," she replied with a yawn.

"Keh."

"Will you also tell me how you got so beat up?"

Inuyasha had to smile at that. "Noticed, did you?"

"Of course I noticed! I’d offer to bandage you up if I could," she declared in frustration.

"I don’t need bandaging. I’m fine."

"You always say that."

"Keh."

Kagome shook her head, grateful for hanyou healing abilities. There was unfortunately nothing she could do about his stubbornness. She was finding it increasingly difficult to keep her eyes open anyway.

"Go to sleep, wench."

"M’kay," she said, shifting slightly to get more comfortable. "Inuyasha?"

"Yeah?"

"You don’t…have to take me back inside if you don’t want to. I could stay…like this…"

If she meant to continue her sentence, sleep overtook her before she was able to. Inuyasha returned to gazing up at the night sky, wondering once again how he’d gotten so lucky. For all the misfortune the Kami had dumped on him over the years, the incomprehensible blessing that was this one girl outweighed the bad a hundred fold. And he had no intention of letting her go. _I could stay like this too, Kagome._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – The fact that Shippou’s knowledge of antidotes is better than Inuyasha’s is based on the manga. At one point, Shippou tells Inuyasha that he administered the antidote. So I think it’s safe to assume that Shippou prepared the antidote in canon. I just used a little bit of artistic license to give Inuyasha some knowledge of the subject as well. He did make that common cold remedy for Kagome that one time.


	15. Recovery

Kagome yawned and stretched, then flinched at the ache that action produced and crossed her arms over her chest in frustration. She spared a glance toward the entryway and saw bright sunlight streaming in through the shoji door. _Another beautiful day, cooped up in this damn room._ She was going to go insane if she had to spend another afternoon indoors. It was already the third day of her recuperation, though at times she felt like _incarceration_ would have been a better description. To be fair, much of the first two days had been spent sleeping, probably on the order of sixteen to eighteen hours per every twenty-four. And even while awake, she hadn’t felt up to much more than brief conversation. Certainly nothing which would involve rising from her futon.

But today she felt slightly better, with an extra surge of energy in her muscles. The timing was perfect, since she was getting more than a little stir crazy. Her _keeper_ wouldn’t like it, but she was going to get some fresh air. Describing Inuyasha in such a manner wouldn’t be fair to him, however, despite his tendency to be a bit overbearing. He had been a wonderful caretaker, for all three of them. He cooked their meals and even fed them if necessary, a task which Shippou also assisted with. Fortunately, some of the temple’s stores of food had been spared by the fire, so he didn’t have to leave them alone to hunt. But that still left the preparation of said meals, which were adequate if not extraordinary, given his lack of practice with cooking for humans. It helped that he kept things simple.

He’d also assisted them with fulfilling other bodily needs, including the preparation of baths for each them once a day. It took a lot of effort to fill a tub with warm water in this time period, and Kagome’s sore muscles greatly appreciated his efforts. He’d also been taking each of them to the temple’s lavatory several times a day. Fortunately, Kagome had never needed him to actually assist her with doing her business, though on the first day it had been a close thing. She had nearly passed out on the bathroom floor with her underwear around her ankles. _That_ would have been a sight to behold. So no, trips to the lavatory were not pleasant. Nor was passing almost syrup-thick urine with a slight greenish tint to it, though at least that was visual evidence of the poison leaving her body. Whatever medicine that Shichinintai member had given them was working, albeit slowly. Kagome still hadn’t gotten Inuyasha to tell her the whole story of how they’d come to be resting alive at this temple, only bits and pieces. He hadn’t seemed to want to burden her with the knowledge until she was feeling better, and she’d been too tired to press the issue. Perhaps today she could get him to share with her. She wanted to know how much he’d had to give of himself in order to save them, so she could tell him how proud and grateful she was.

Inuyasha had at least taken care of himself as well, while caring for his invalid friends. When she’d woken up early in the afternoon on the first day of their recuperation, she found him topless but covered in bandages. He’d been wearing a strange set of hakama, maybe something a traveler had left in the temple at some point. His fire-rat robes had been washed and hung out to dry, their self-healing abilities mending all the cuts and holes. His white kosode was ruined, but he later managed to scrounge another robe with a similar style from some storeroom in the temple. So her concern that he would neglect his own health proved to be unfounded, though he probably only spent so much time taking care of himself because he wanted to be in top condition in case of another enemy attack. But whatever the reason, Kagome was pleased to see him recovering from their ordeal as well.

So, when Inuyasha yelled at her for leaving her futon, she would _try_ to be nice to him. She would politely explain that she needed to get out of that room for a while. And if he was still adamant that she go back inside, there were other tactics she could use. She would try to avoid utilizing the ‘osuwari’ command if at all possible, but if he was being truly stubborn, sometimes that was the only way to deal with him.

After a deep breath, Kagome pulled back the covers and gingerly rose to her feet. She wobbled for a moment, nearly losing her balance and falling on top of Sango. Once the world stopped spinning, she moved to the opposite wall and used it for support as she made her way past her companions with baby steps. She paused only once, to glance at the taijiya whom she had nearly awoken so rudely. Sango was having the most difficult time recovering, and she spent more time sleeping than anyone. This was probably due to her small frame and the significant amount of physical activity she’d undergone in Mukotsu’s hut, which had accelerated the spread of the poison. She probably would have died first if not for the antidote, a thought which still made Kagome shudder.

Thus far, the two of them were still the only people who knew exactly what had transpired inside that hellhole. Kagome hadn’t told Inuyasha yet, though she knew she would. He deserved to know, and more than that, Sango deserved his gratitude. The taijiya’s body still bore the marks of her would-be rapist. Her face was gradually healing, the bruises shifting into a new amalgam of dismal colors each day. Every afternoon, Kagome had Inuyasha prepare an antibiotic salve which Kaede had shown her. Then after he put up a privacy screen, she rubbed it into Sango’s chest as the older girl tried to constrain herself to a few isolated hisses of discomfort. The effort left Kagome exhausted, but it was well worth it. Sango’s breasts were a patchwork of scabs and partially-mended cuts, but eventually they would heal with no permanent scarring. It also meant that Inuyasha would not have to perform the task, since he was the next logical candidate. The hanyou would surely do it without complaint, even before learning that the wounds had been inflicted as part of Sango’s attempt to save her and their baby. But it would be incredibly uncomfortable for both of them, and she was glad to spare them from that.

It was warm inside the hut, but still Kagome wore heavy flannel pajamas. The poison almost seemed to have aged her body sixty or seventy years, so that was the only way she could keep warm at night. But outside in the bright sunshine, the cooling breeze was such a relief that she simply indulged for a moment, standing on the temple grounds with her eyes closed and heaving a blissful sigh. She heard a _thump_ , and opened her eyes to find Inuyasha standing before her, arms crossed over his chest and an irritated scowl adorning his features.

"What’re you doing out here, wench?"

Kagome took the relatively polite nature of his inquiry as a good sign. No swearing, and he wasn’t even yelling yet? Probably because of her condition, she supposed.

"I need some fresh air, Inuyasha."

"What you need is rest, baka. Get your ass back in bed."

Kagome grimaced. _So much for being polite._ " _Please_ , Inuyasha," she pleaded, frustrated that she was beginning to get a headache already. "I just want to spend a few hours outdoors. If you make me go back inside, I’ll go crazy!"

Inuyasha looked like he wanted to argue, but his gaze also softened. Perhaps he figured that continuing the quarrel would do her more harm than acquiescing to her request. It was probably true, she reflected; she would pass out on the ground before she gave in. And he knew it too.

"Fine!" he snapped. "But you ain’t walkin’ around."

Without another word, he scooped her up and hopped up to the roof. Instead of cradling her in his arms, as he’d done the other night, he deposited her on the sloping wood and squatted next to her, eyeing her warily. Then he leapt down and returned moments later with the mat from her futon. Kagome grinned wryly, amused at how determined he was that she remain ‘in bed.’ At least this way he could count it as a partial victory. Not that she was complaining; she had gotten what she wanted and her backside had a nice soft surface to sit on. She thanked him for the trouble and turned her gaze to the surrounding area. It was beautiful, this part of Japan. From their high vantage point, the full breathtaking splendor of nature was on display.

For a good half hour she simply took it all in, loving every moment of fresh air in her lungs and sunlight on her skin. Then the breeze picked up again, chilling rather than cooling this time. A shiver passed through her, and a few seconds later she found Inuyasha’s haori draped over her shoulders. She pulled the garment close and turned to her hanyou.

"Thank you, Inuyasha."

He grunted in response, but to Kagome’s surprise he didn’t seem annoyed. Perhaps because he’d seen that she wasn’t about to drop dead from being out of the hut. He hadn’t said anything since returning with her futon, but now his demeanor spoke of quiet contentment. And she knew that now was a good time for a long overdue conversation.

"Seriously, Inuyasha, thank you. You’ve been wonderful, taking care of us."

He blushed and snorted to brush away the praise. "Keh. How many times have you taken care of me?"

"Hm. I’m just sorry I couldn’t care for your wounds this time."

"Don’t worry about it. Shippou helped me with the bandages."

Kagome made a mental note to thank Shippou for that. The kit had been an attentive caregiver as well, though what he could do was limited by his stature. She would make sure to let him know how much she appreciated it.

"You know, you never told me how you got to be in such rough shape. What happened after we passed out the other day?"

Inuyasha sighed, but began the tale without protest. Kagome didn’t interrupt, aside from the occasional involuntary gasp. She was especially amazed to learn that he’d transformed again, due to nearly being killed by Ginkotsu. Given the relative ease with which he’d dispatched Ginkotsu and Renkotsu at the temple, it was obvious that his near-death experience in the first battle had resulted from being saddled with unconscious friends to protect. To his credit, Inuyasha said nothing which would support this assumption, but she knew it was true. She was also impressed that he’d thought to go after Renkotsu to obtain an antidote. Inuyasha had truly shined under immense pressure, and she didn’t hesitate to let him know it.

"Keh," he muttered in embarrassment. "Just doing what I had to."

Kagome smiled and shook her head at his modesty. He could trash talk with the best of them in front of enemies, but with friends he was usually fairly humble. As was his comrade-in-arms, who also deserved to be lauded for her act of self-sacrifice. So she told Inuyasha of the terrible events inside Mukotsu’s hut, how the poison user had discovered their child, how Sango had distracted him as he was about to kill it, and how the two of them had barely managed to slay him instead. As expected, Inuyasha was awestruck.

"She did that for us?" he mumbled, understandably amazed. It was not a common occurrence to learn that someone was willing to endure suffering and death on your behalf, especially for a hanyou rejected by the vast majority of humans and youkai. But Inuyasha now had several such friends, and he knew that he would make the same level of sacrifice for each of them. Losing them would have been an even greater tragedy than he’d imagined.

"I’m sorry I wasn’t there," he muttered. "I could’ve gotten there faster, but—"

"But you couldn’t leave Miroku-sama behind," Kagome finished for him. "Sango-chan and I would never want you to leave Miroku-sama in danger just to save us. You defeated Jakotsu and came as quickly as you could. That’s all we can ask."

Inuyasha nodded, relieved that Kagome saw things the same way he did. A series of unfortunate events had nearly cost them their lives, but it was difficult to place blame. Of course, if they had died, Inuyasha would have found a way to blame himself. But since they were alive, it was easy to focus on helping them get well, rather than agonizing over how they had come so close to death in the first place.

Silence settled over the pair once more, as Kagome returned her attention to the gorgeous surrounding countryside. Eventually her eyelids grew heavy, and she lay down for a nap, curling onto her side and using Inuyasha’s haori as a blanket.

"You should go back inside, wench," the hanyou told her.

"Don’t wanna," she replied drowsily. She could practically hear his eyes rolling, but he made no further comment other than some grumbling under his breath. Warmed by his haori and the gentle caress of sunlight on her face, and watched over by the man she loved, Kagome had no trouble drifting off to slumber.

* * *

The next day, Kagome was pleased to find that she felt slightly better than the previous day. The recovery process was progressing, slowly but surely. And like yesterday, she desperately wanted to get out of the hut for a while. This time, she rolled up her futon and took it with her, knowing that Inuyasha would once again insist on her staying ‘in bed.’ As long as that bed could be out in the sunshine, she had no cause to complain.

"Hey, Kagome-chan."

Sango’s greeting startled her, and she found the taijiya gazing at her with a certain degree of irritation. Behind her, Miroku lay on his back, snoring softly.

"Hi, Sango-chan. What’s wrong?"

"You didn’t have to tell him what happened, Kagome-chan."

Kagome quickly realized what her friend was upset about. Inuyasha must have said something to Sango last night or this morning, which probably left her feeling quite embarrassed. But that wasn’t a terrible thing, as far as Kagome was concerned.

"I had to, Sango-chan. He is the father of my baby."

Sango sighed, but conceded the point. "Fine. Just don’t tell…anyone else."

Kagome nodded to indicate that she wouldn’t. She had taken the decision out of Sango’s hands with regards to Inuyasha, because the hanyou had sired the child she had saved. But whether Miroku ever found out what happened inside Mukotsu’s hut should be Sango’s decision alone. Kagome supposed she could understand why the taijiya was uncomfortable with the prospect, even though the knowledge would only increase the monk’s opinion of her. But it wasn’t her call, and Miroku would never hear a word about it from her.

Sango still seemed slightly annoyed, and not really interested in further conversation, so Kagome left her to her brooding. She found Inuyasha more than willing to take her up to the roof again. And as she sat there gazing at him, her heart somewhat aflutter, she had to wonder if he’d been looking forward to this. A suspicion supported by the jealous glare he shot Shippou’s way when the kit joined them, snuggling into her lap. But she was not about to turn Shippou away; the little fox needed her too. It was enough to know that Inuyasha enjoyed their quiet alone time as much as she did.

But it was not to be. All too soon, Kagome felt a familiar sensation brushing against her consciousness. She looked to Inuyasha to gauge his reaction, and seeing that he was more annoyed than alarmed, she was able to discern who the owner of the approaching jewel shards was.

So the appearance of the whirlwind on the shrine grounds came as no surprise, though Kagome did get quite a shock when the winds subsided and Kouga materialized, standing twenty meters away and gazing up at them. For slung across the wolf’s back was her enormous yellow bag, and in his hand he carried Miroku’s staff. Inuyasha had hidden those items near the battlefield, but evidently not well enough to conceal them from a sensitive nose. As to why Kouga had them, and why he was even here at all, Kagome was quickly developing a theory.

Not that Inuyasha particularly cared about the answer to either question. He had already risen to his feet and placed his hand on Tetsusaiga’s hilt, clearly not in the mood to mess around.

"What the hell are you doing here, wolf? Drop that shit and beat it!"

"I need to talk to Kagome," came Kouga’s reply, soft but firm. "Alone."

"The hell you do! Get the fuck out of here before I skin you alive!"

"Inuyasha, wait a minute," Kagome told him.

The hanyou rounded on her. "Oh, no, wench. Do _not_ tell me to let you go with that bastard!"

"I think he just wants some closure, Inuyasha," she said quietly, so Kouga wouldn’t overhear. The wolf prince’s demeanor was one of humility, his youkai aura subdued. Kagome could not bring herself to fear him, or to distrust his intentions. A confidence Inuyasha did not seem to share.

"I’ll give him some fucking closure," the hanyou snarled, cracking his knuckles.

"Inuyasha…"

"Dammit, wench! What if he wants to take you away from me? What if he pulls some shit, like ‘if I can’t have her, no one will?’"

"Kouga-kun isn’t like that," she assured him confidently. But she did understand Inuyasha’s concerns, given how violent their last encounter had been. Kouga’s murderous intent had been directed at the hanyou, however, and only before he was unequivocally told that Inuyasha was not a rapist. After that, he had behaved reasonably enough, for someone who was obviously hurting.

"And if he does try something," Kagome stated, cutting off Inuyasha’s protest. She called upon her miko energy, allowing the pure light to glow around her for a moment, as Inuyasha took an involuntary step back with widened eyes.

"Just remember that I’m still a miko," she finished, her tone indicating that she would not hesitate to use her power if she was wrong about Kouga’s intentions. And she wouldn’t; more than just her own life was at stake here. But she would not be lobbying to allow the wolf prince the private conversation he desired if she was not absolutely certain that he meant her—and the baby—no harm. The display of spiritual energy was really just to make Inuyasha feel better.

It worked, to a degree. The hanyou clearly didn’t like the idea, but he knew he couldn’t stop her either. Because this was one of those times when she would use the ‘osuwari’ command to get her way, if necessary. Inuyasha needed to show that he respected her enough to trust her judgment on this. He gazed at her, conflicting emotions warring in his golden pools. He wanted to trust her, knew how intelligent she was, but couldn’t completely banish his fears.

Swearing under his breath, the hanyou helped her down from the roof and walked with her until they stood a few meters before the wolf prince. Seeing Kouga up close, Kagome was more confident than ever that her assessment of him was correct.

"Stay in sight," Inuyasha ordered, voice hard and threatening. "And if you lay one finger on her, I’m going to shred you."

Kouga nodded his agreement to the terms, and walked off in the opposite direction, leaving Kagome to follow. She did, until he turned and sat on the ground facing her. She glanced over her shoulder to find Inuyasha anxiously keeping his distance, ready to race in if Kouga so much as looked at her the wrong way. But if they spoke quietly, the words would not reach the hanyou’s ears. Kagome smiled, grateful that Inuyasha trusted her, even if he didn’t trust Kouga. She sat down to face the wolf prince, who stared longingly at her for a few moments before looking away.

"Thanks for coming," he said quietly.

"No problem. And thank you for returning our things. How did you find us?"

"I was looking for you. A couple days after…our last meeting, I decided that I needed to talk to you again. I stumbled across that battlefield, the one with the lingering stench of poison. There was a lot of Inuyasha’s blood on the ground, and when I found your bag…"

"You tracked us all the way here because you were worried," Kagome finished, smiling warmly. She could tell that Kouga had put a lot of effort into locating them, following faded scent trails, all the while worrying that he might never see her again. This of course begged the question, of why he wanted to see her so badly at all.

"What did you want to talk about, Kouga-kun?"

"I, uh…" He swallowed, rubbing the back of his neck nervously. Kagome waited patiently for him to find his words.

"Was it me?" he asked finally. "Was it something I did or said?"

Kagome’s smile turned sad, but she was grateful for this opportunity to explain herself fully to her one-way love interest, to let him down easy.

"No, Kouga-kun, it wasn’t you. You were always nice to me. You made me feel wanted, even when Inuyasha hurt my feelings. That’s probably why I let you keep calling me ‘your woman,’ even after I realized that I was in love with him. But…I can’t control who I love. I’m sorry."

Kouga nodded, not appearing nearly as heartbroken as Kagome feared. Perhaps he was beginning to understand that his feelings for her were not as strong as he’d claimed them to be. After all, how could he truly love someone he barely knew? But she still hated to see him so despondent, so she tried to lighten the mood.

"Some other girl is going to be very lucky to have you, Kouga-kun."

He snorted, but some of his old playfulness returned. "She’d have to be pretty special to compete with you, Kagome. That baka hanyou doesn’t know how lucky he is. He doesn’t even realize you’re in love with him, does he?"

"No, and please promise me you won’t tell him."

"And let him off easy? Not a chance! You just keep him sweating until he pulls his head out of his ass, okay?"

Kagome laughed. "Deal."

Ecstatic to have her friend back, she rose to her knees, crawled over to Kouga and hugged him. The heartfelt embrace the wolf prince gave her in return spoke of respect and affection.

"Oi! I told you not to touch her!" Inuyasha yelled, and Kagome could hear his rapidly approaching footsteps.

"Aw, shut up, you windbag!" Kouga shouted back, rising to his feet and pulling her up with him. "Don’t get all jealous over a little hug."

"Wh—I’m not fucking jealous!" Inuyasha thundered, the sheer ferocity of his tone belying his statement. "I just don’t want her smelling all nasty. Bad enough I’m gonna have to wash her bag about fifty times to get the stench out."

"Oh yeah? Well maybe you should worry less about how she smells and more about taking care of her!"

Inuyasha could only gape at him in shock. Evidently, now that his friendship with Kagome had been revived, Kouga felt comfortable with criticizing the hanyou for his obvious failure.

"Kagome’s normally warm skin is cool to the touch. And her lips, which usually have the color of cherry blossoms, are white as a fish’s belly. You left her in such a bad situation that she almost died! How could you be so careless?!"

"You bastard…" Inuyasha growled through gritted teeth, looking like he wanted to beat Kouga into a bloody pulp.

"It wasn’t Inuyasha’s fault, Kouga-kun," Kagome interjected. Both males turned surprised gazes to her, but Inuyasha’s amber orbs also reflected something far deeper. Her heartbeat quickened, but she licked her suddenly dry lips and completed her statement.

"Sometimes Inuyasha…isn’t as careful as he could be. But this time it really wasn’t his fault. And besides, he went to incredible lengths to save us."

Kouga studied her for a moment, gauging the truth of her words. Then he snorted and turned back to Inuyasha.

"Well, Inu-kurro, I guess you’re off the hook. But the next time you let Kagome get into that much danger, I’m gonna kick your ass!"

"Bring it, you mangy fleabag. Any time, any place!"

Kagome groaned and put her head in her hands. This childish bickering was going to give her a migraine pretty soon. Fortunately, this proved to be just Kouga’s ritual of pissing Inuyasha off before leaving.

"See you around, Kagome. And remember, keep him sweating!"

When Kouga was gone, Inuyasha glared at her as if to ask what the hell the wolf had meant by that. Kagome ignored him and walked back to the hut, her shoulders slumped with only partially feigned fatigue and hoping it would encourage Inuyasha to leave her alone. Luckily for both of them, he did; she would ‘osuwari’ him a hundred times before she enlightened him as to the meaning of Kouga’s little comment. She was annoyed with the wolf prince for putting her in this situation, but she had also seen past his playful exterior. He was still hurting, and probably would be for some time. Still, it warmed her heart to see him returning to his old self.

Inuyasha still seemed a little grumpy by the time Kagome woke from her afternoon nap a few hours later. He was focused on preparing the fire and cooking the evening meal, so she left him to it. Since Kouga had so graciously returned her bag, she determined to take advantage of the remaining light. Within ten minutes she’d flung her math book away in frustration, her head throbbing with every mysterious variable and unsolvable equation. But she refused to simply sit there twiddling her thumbs; perhaps some casual reading would be more agreeable? She rummaged through her bag and found the pregnancy book her mother had purchased for her.

This was much easier, she was pleased to discover. On the road, she tried to spend what little downtime she had studying. Here she had nothing but downtime, and since she wasn’t up to studying, she was grateful for her mother’s thoughtfulness. She intended to eventually read the book cover to cover, but today she just skimmed, looking at pictures and reading parts which seemed especially interesting. In the middle of the book was a long spread of images depicting the development of the fetus at various stages of pregnancy. It was fascinating to her, to see how her baby would grow and gradually take human form over the coming months.

"See something interesting, wench?"

Inuyasha’s gruff question startled her, and she realized that she had been totally engrossed. But his curiosity seemed genuine, so she decided to share.

"See for yourself," she told him, closing the book and tossing it over. "Page one-eighty, I think it was."

Briefly she wondered if Inuyasha could read page numbers, but he seemed to know what he was doing as he flipped through. It dawned on her that she had no idea how well he could read, or if he could read at all. And she knew better than to ask with him in a less than jovial mood. At least here she was just trying to show him some pictures.

Inuyasha’s eyes nearly bugged out of his skull as he stared at the page. Kagome found that a little odd, but when his cheeks flushed as red as his haori, she knew something was seriously wrong. He slammed the book closed and flung it back at her as if it burned his hands. Then he muttered a ‘keh’ and stormed out of the hut.

Kagome could only stare after him. _What the heck just happened?_ Bewildered, she picked up the book and flipped to the section of images again. They showed a cross-section of the chest and torso of a naked woman, but obviously the focus was on the fetus seen inside her belly. And it was closer to a cartoon than it was an actual photograph. Kagome had thought nothing of showing it to Inuyasha, since even the hanyou wasn’t embarrassed _that_ easily. But his reaction had been way over the top for some reason. It took a couple minutes before she figured out a possible cause. The images of mother and fetus began on page one hundred _fifty_. Fifty. Not eighty as she’d told Inuyasha. With dread settling in her stomach, she flipped to page one hundred eighty.

She groaned and thumped her head against the wall. It was worse than she feared. For on page one hundred eighty was another image, this one depicting a pregnant woman and a man. Again, nothing explicit was shown, but it was very obvious that the two figures were engaged in sexual intercourse. Kagome flipped through the following and preceding pages, which were filled with more images of the amorous couple making love in various positions. Eventually she came to the first page of the chapter, which was entitled, "Lovemaking during Pregnancy."

Kagome imagined that having sex during pregnancy would be very different from doing so while not with child. She had heard that a woman’s sexual desire could fluctuate, or that she could suffer from bleeding or other unpleasant side effects which could derail her love life. Not to mention the distended belly which would naturally make intercourse awkward if no adjustment was made. So she understood the reason for this chapter. But did they really _have_ to put it in this particular book? And did she really _have_ to be so careless about the page number? Did this count as a Freudian slip, or was she just unlucky?

"What’s wrong, Kagome-chan?" Sango asked. The taijiya had been awake for some time, so she had surely witnessed Inuyasha’s reaction and subsequent storm off. Too mortified to explain, Kagome instead opened the book to the page Inuyasha had seen and handed it to Sango. The taijiya gasped and blushed, favoring Kagome with a questioning look.

"Sango-chan…I just accidentally told Inuyasha to read that entire chapter."

Sango’s eyes widened in understanding, and then she did something unexpected. She laughed. It was a sound none of them got to hear very often, merry and melodic. Normally Kagome would be thrilled to hear it, but today Sango’s amusement only annoyed her. She was about to yell at the taijiya when her laughter suddenly turned into a coughing fit. It took Sango a while to recover, but when she did she was still smiling. Kagome crossed her arms over her chest and pouted.

"Sorry, Kagome-chan. But you have to admit that it’s pretty funny."

"No, it’s not! Inuyasha won’t be able to look at me ever again."

"Oh, he’ll be fine. Just tell him it was a mistake. If you think about it, this is no more embarrassing than some of the other stuff that’s already happened to the two of you."

"Thanks, Sango-chan," Kagome muttered sarcastically, which set the taijiya to giggling once more. Okay, so maybe she was making a bigger deal of this than it actually was. It was still beyond mortifying. Explaining her error to Inuyasha was _not_ going to be a fun conversation. She shuddered to imagine what he must be thinking right now.

"Hm," Miroku interjected suddenly. "It sounds like that portion of your book might interest me, Kagome-sama. Would you mind letting me borrow it?"

The panicked look on Sango’s face did much to improve Kagome’s mood. The taijiya was shaking her head, pleading with her not to give Miroku any more ammunition in his perverted arsenal. Kagome grinned evilly and put her finger to her chin, pretending that she was making a difficult decision. Of course she wouldn’t show Miroku that chapter. But it was rewarding to see Sango sweat a bit.

"It’s not something that would interest you, Miroku-sama," she stated eventually, somehow managing to keep a straight face.

"Really?" he asked doubtfully. "Are you certain?"

"Quite."

After a moment, Miroku shrugged and rolled over to go back to sleep. Sango sighed in relief and wiped the sweat from her brow. Kagome chuckled quietly to herself; she didn’t think the taijiya would be laughing at her anymore. Emboldened by this turn of events, she picked up the book and flipped to the beginning of that ‘special’ chapter. She was already in trouble, so why not find out what all the fuss was about?

She quickly came up with a good reason not to indulge her curiosity, though by then it was too late. Before she knew it, she had read a bit too much of that chapter, since her overly vivid imagination kept trying to envision what it might be like to be the woman in the pictures. How would it feel to lie with Inuyasha in such a manner, and would she ever get to experience it? Sober. Would she ever get to experience it _sober?_ She was sure her hormones also contributed to her being a little hot and bothered. Yes, definitely the hormones.

Once she had composed herself, she decided that she’d put off talking to Inuyasha long enough. She found him sitting on the ruins of the temple entrance, brooding in silence. He came over when she called for him, but couldn’t bring himself to look at her, as predicted.

"Inuyasha, I’m really sorry," she blurted out, wanting to get this over with as quickly as possible. "I told you the wrong page number by mistake. I didn’t mean to embarrass you."

Inuyasha seemed simultaneously disappointed and relieved, though the latter emotion was more dominant. He still avoided eye contact, though perhaps that was because of what he wanted to say.

"I didn’t know women could…do _that_ , when they got big."

"Oh…the book says normal s-sex is fine, throughout pregnancy."

Kagome nearly smacked herself. _Great job, Kagome. Why don’t you just come right out and proposition him?_ Inuyasha digested this information in silence and continued to fidget. Kagome knew that if she didn’t change the subject soon, he was going to run off again.

"Do you…want to see the pictures I _meant_ to show you?"

He finally looked at her, his expression guarded. But he _was_ interested, that much was clear. And eventually, curiosity won out over embarrassment. At his nod, Kagome produced the book, which she had been holding behind her back, and opened it to the correct page.

"It shows you how the baby will grow inside me until he’s ready to be born," she told him. Inuyasha grunted in reply, already engrossed. He studied each picture carefully, sometimes cocking his head to the side in that adorable way of his, as if he couldn’t fathom how the baby fit in there so snugly. When he was finished, he raised his eyes and gazed at her with a certain amount of awe in his expression.

"Can I read this when you’re not using it?"

"You can read?" Kagome asked, immediately cursing herself for not thinking her words through. Wasn’t that Inuyasha’s thing? Yet, she had done it twice in ten minutes, on top of accidentally telling him to read the ‘lovemaking’ section of the pregnancy book. She was not having a good day. Hopefully Inuyasha would have mercy on her because she was still recovering from the poison.

"I’m sorry," she muttered, eyes downcast. "That was really insensitive of me."

"Keh," he replied, shrugging. Everyone he met assumed he couldn’t read, most because he was a hanyou. Kagome wasn’t like that. If she made that assumption, it was because the vast majority of people in this time were illiterate, not because he lacked the requisite intelligence. His mother had been a woman of the upper class, which meant that she knew how to read, a knowledge she had tried to pass on to her young son, despite the stubborn boy’s griping. The task had not been completed by the time she passed away, but Inuyasha had proven to be a quick learner and could still puzzle his way through most texts. Some of the modern words from Kagome’s book were a lost cause, but he knew he could ask her for an explanation if he had to.

"It’s fine, wench. I read well enough to manage. So can I borrow the damn book already?"

"S-sure!" Kagome answered, glad that he wasn’t upset with her. She did wonder, however, if Inuyasha would be reading that one certain chapter of the book in particular. Not that she could complain, either way. How could she blame him for satisfying his curiosity, when she had already done the same?

For Inuyasha’s part, he fully intended to read the book from cover to cover. Though perhaps not in exact order.

* * *

"How many times do I have to fucking tell you, wench? I’m _not_ tired!"

Kagome grimaced and put her hand to her temple. _Easy, Kagome. Deep breaths. If you ‘osuwari’ him, he’ll only get crankier._ Resisting the temptation was easier said than done. Inuyasha had been especially grouchy this morning, which she had realized was not an isolated event. Even yesterday, he had been a little crueler than necessary to Kouga, and his mood after dinner had been sour for no reason. Or so she thought at the time. Now she understood the cause of his crankiness.

Inuyasha had not slept in over five days. Dozing off at night with ears primed for danger didn’t count. Even youkai needed regular periods of deep sleep, so the mind could rest and the brain could repair itself. But good luck telling that to a sleep-deprived, surly hanyou. Especially one whose reason for keeping himself perpetually alert was to protect his friends. But such a sacrifice was no longer necessary, in Kagome’s opinion. Sango and Miroku were up and about for the first time today. All of them could keep watch; between her miko senses, and Shippou and Kirara’s sense of smell, they should be able to detect any danger long before it arrived. Again, good luck convincing Inuyasha. The five of them agreed on this, that the hanyou needed sleep, in part to make him less miserable to be around. But it was also for his own good, a message which Kagome was determined to beat into that thick skull of his if necessary. Hopefully it wouldn’t come to that.

"Inuyasha, I’m not telling you that you’re tired. It’s f—"

"Good, ‘cause I’m not!"

"Fine! Really, I believe you! It’s just that you’re kind of…"

"Kind of what, wench?" he demanded, and Kagome sensed that she was on thin ice.

"You…you seem like you’re not feeling well," she amended. "You’ll feel better if you lie down for a bit. You can use my sleeping bag! It’s really nice and comfy."

"Bah, I don’t need to lie do—"

" _Please,_ Inuyasha. You’ve been doing _so_ much for us lately. Anyone would get run down taking care of a bunch of humans. Go relax for a bit. We’ll keep watch."

Perhaps it was her begging. Perhaps it was the acknowledgment of his efforts, or seeing his friends put up a united front against him. Or maybe he realized deep down that his body needed the rest. Whatever the reason, he finally caved, though he most certainly did not admit defeat.

"Dammit. All right, I’ll go lie down. But I’m _not_ fucking sleeping."

"That’s fine, Inuyasha," Kagome replied sweetly. "Enjoy your rest. We’ll call you if anything interesting happens."

He went away grumbling quietly, but Kagome did not release the breath she’d been holding until he disappeared inside the hut. She slumped over, exhausted by the effort. Fighting with Inuyasha was like arguing with a brick wall sometimes. A very immature brick wall.

"Quite impressive, Kagome-sama," Miroku teased. "Your powers of persuasion over our stubborn friend have certainly grown stronger."

"Ugh, I feel like I need a nap now."

"Go and join him, by all means. I’m sure he wouldn’t mind even if you wanted to share your sleeping roll with h—ow! Sango, what ever was that for?"

"Don’t start being a pervert again just because you’re feeling better," the taijiya told him, not fooled by his innocent act.

Miroku grinned lecherously. "Ah, but I don’t think either of you ladies are in position to criticize me for being a pervert. That chapter of your book was most enlightening, Kagome-sama."

Both women flushed deep red immediately. _Ah darn it! How has everyone managed to read that damn book already? I should have burned it._ Her mistake had been believing Miroku to be fooled. She should have known better. The monk was like a bloodhound when anything or anyone of questionable morality was around.

"It even contained some _fascinating_ information which I was not aware of," the rejuvenated lecher continued. "I now consider myself an expert at pleasing women of all shapes and sizes. Sango, might you allow me the opportunity to demonstrate—oof!"

Kagome shook her head as Sango stormed off and Miroku rubbed his sore cranium. She sat down next to Shippou, who was watching the shenanigans of the adults while sucking on a stick of pocky.

"He did know that wasn’t going to work, right?" the kit asked.

Kagome sighed. "He’s a baka, and so is Inuyasha. Promise me you won’t grow up to be like them, Shippou-chan," she said, only half joking.

"Keh."

Kagome burst out laughing, positively tickled by the kit’s spot-on impression of Inuyasha. "Fine, just don’t say anything perverted like Miroku-sama!" she exclaimed between chuckles.

"I’m so misunderstood."

Through her giggles, Kagome realized that it had been far too long since she’d spent any time with Shippou. A mistake she intended to rectify right now. She pulled him into her lap and ruffled his hair.

"Hey, I never taught you how to play with those _hanafuda_ cards, did I?"

"No, can you teach me?"

"Of course! By the time I show the others, you’ll already be an expert and you’ll kick their butts for sure."

"I already consider myself an expert at pleasing—"

"Don’t finish that sentence!" Kagome yelled in a failed attempt at being stern. But Shippou knew his boundaries, so he let the joke end there. Still chuckling, Kagome crept over to the hut and peeked inside. What she saw made her simultaneously want to kick Inuyasha in the head and stand there watching him all morning. Instead, she quietly retrieved the cards from her bag and exited the hut.

Sango intercepted her on the way back to Shippou. "Is Inuyasha sleeping?"

"Like a baby."

"Stubborn dope."

"He certainly is, Sango-chan," Kagome replied, though her amusement gave way to concern when she saw what the older girl was wearing. She was clad in her taijiya armour and carried hiraikotsu over her shoulder; it appeared that she was going to train.

"Please don’t overdo it, Sango-chan."

"I won’t, Kagome-chan. I just need to get away from thickheaded men for a while."

Kagome grinned. "I know what you mean, Sango-chan."

* * *

Sango stood in the wooded clearing, breathing heavily and leaning on hiraikotsu. Kagome had told her not to overdo it. Too bad she hadn’t listened. Even putting forth only half of her normal training effort had left her sore in muscles she didn’t even know she had. Her right hand was still healing as well; she didn’t have all of her strength back yet. But she believed that with time she would recover most of her previous dexterity. Fortunately, the wound was quite small and apparently not in a vital area. All in all, the mental satisfaction she derived from working on her craft made up for the physical consequences. Just barely. If nothing else, at least she had proven that she wasn’t an invalid. She was no longer vulnerable to the whims and depraved purposes of enemies without Inuyasha to protect her. She could take care of herself, fight off any attacker, as she’d always done. Before that day…

Miroku stood in the shade of a nearby tree. He had watched Sango train with abject fascination. How she moved, with such grace, a pure beauty which transcended the physical. The way she pushed through her body’s obvious weakness with unwavering determination. In short, he had been mesmerized. But now she was just standing there with her back to him; obviously, she had no idea he was there. It was an opportunity too good to miss.

He expected to get slapped, as he always did. He was prepared for Sango to be a bit more upset with him than usual, because he’d snuck up on her while training. But nothing could have prepared him for the taijiya’s actual reaction. As soon as his hand touched her backside, she spun and smacked it away with her left arm. In retrospect, it was very fortunate that she’d turned the way she had, for with her right hand she triggered the hidden blade which sprang up from the guard on her forearm. Then she dropped into a fighting stance with a fierce expression on her face. Miroku could very easily have lost a hand, he observed. Or worse.

Not that it would have been anything less than he deserved. Watching Sango train so exquisitely, he had forgotten what she had been through recently. He had failed to remember how she’d earned those still visible bruises on her face. He knew what had transpired inside Mukotsu’s hut; he had pestered Inuyasha one evening until the hanyou spilled the beans. So he could not use ignorance as an excuse for his insensitivity. Had he really just groped a woman who’d nearly been raped? Was he such a terrible person? He would be lucky if Sango ever spoke to him again. But as much as he wanted to undo his wrong, he couldn’t. All he could do was apologize and pray she didn’t hate him for it.

"Please forgive me, Sango," he begged, bowing deeply. "I forgot myself. That was incredibly inconsiderate of me."

Sango blinked, then looked down at herself in surprise. Her eyes widened in shock as she realized what she’d almost done. Even his familiar touch had set her nerves aflame, conjuring up haunting memories and sparking a fierce reflex of self-preservation. For just a moment, it hadn’t been about stopping someone from groping her. It had been about survival. And Miroku had nearly paid for this lapse in sanity with his life.

"N-no, Houshi-sama," she stuttered as she struggled to retract her arm blade with shaking hands. "I’m the one who should apologize. I overreacted. I—"

"You reacted in a reasonable manner based on recent experience," Miroku interrupted contritely. "The fault lies with me. Once again, I beg your forgiveness."

Sango froze, gazing at him in confusion. _Recent experience? He can’t mean…_

"Kagome-chan," she snarled, her hands clenching into fists. She had never been so furious at her friend. How could she have betrayed her trust like that?

"It was Inuyasha, actually," Miroku stated. "And do not be upset with him. I can be very persuasive when I want to be."

Coming from him, those words should have been delivered with a lecherous air. But Miroku was completely serious, which really brought the situation home to Sango. The monk knew. He was aware of what had happened to her, and he still groped her. Once she had processed this, she decided it was a good thing that he was practically groveling at her feet. But she believed him when he said that he’d forgotten himself. It was an accident, a momentary oversight, and it was obvious that he felt terrible about it. So she would forgive him, this one time. He could not forget himself again. If he didn’t give her the time she needed to heal, he might not survive the next mistake.

"It’s all right, Houshi-sama," she told him, encouraged by the overwhelming relief in his eyes. "I will ask that you refrain from touching my backside in the near future."

Under other circumstances, Miroku might have pointed out that Sango had tacitly granted him permission to renew his caresses of her backside after the ‘near future’ had passed. But now certainly wasn’t the time for that. As ecstatic as he was to receive Sango’s forgiveness, he understood what she didn’t say. This couldn’t happen again, for reasons well beyond his physical safety. His very friendship with Sango was at stake here. It would be difficult to restrain his lecherous habits, but he would manage. If he was not confident that he could keep his wayward hand to himself, he would chop it off right now and be done with it.

Sango seemed surprised by the determination in his expression, but pleased as well. She favored him with a small but sincere smile and sat down on the grass, silently inviting him to join her. He did so, making sure to keep a respectful distance. But while Sango seemed content to observe the natural beauty around them, presided over by the setting sun, Miroku was anything but content. His hand practically twitched, and it dawned on him just how much groping had become a habit. He had to wonder how many ‘moments’ he’d ruined with her. At least a few that he could remember, probably more. In the beginning, he hadn’t minded. But now, more and more he saw Sango as a potential partner, rather than simply a friend and traveling companion. He had never met anyone like her; incidents like the events inside Mukotsu’s hut reminded him just how special she was. Sango was, in short, the most incredible woman he’d ever met. And his groping had likely kept them from getting to know each other as much as they should have.

The one recent moment he hadn’t ruined, he reflected, occurred when he’d been simply too weak to consider copping a feel. Lying so close to her outside Mukotsu’s hut, both of them on the verge of losing consciousness, their hands so intimately entwined. The memory made him smile, and inspired him. Perhaps there was a way to satisfy his craving for physical contact and preserve Sango’s dignity.

"Sango, may I ask you something?"

"What is it, Houshi-sama?"

"If in the future, when I am confronted with the urge to touch you in an intimate manner…would you mind if I held your hand instead?"

Sango immediately turned beat red, and she put both hands to her flaming cheeks while turning away from him. His smile turned wry. Sango, the consummate warrior, the strongest person he knew, was still a woman, and could be delightfully feminine. It was a contradiction which never failed to entice him. As her backside was doing now, as it shifted alluringly with her nervous fidgeting. But as he thought, it was not so hard to resist the temptation, when the reason was so important.

She kept him waiting for an answer for several minutes. But he wasn’t worried. If she was going to refuse him, she wouldn’t find it so hard to look at him. Twice she turned to him, only to lose her nerve. Finally, she composed herself on the third attempt.

"T-That would be f-f-fine, Houshi-sama."

Grinning playfully now, Miroku held up his wayward right hand expectantly. For a moment it looked like she was going to balk, but then she ever so cautiously placed her left hand against his palm. His fingers closed gently around hers, relishing the contact. Her skin was rough, from years of training and toil, and covered in a fine sheen of perspiration from her exertions. But he didn’t mind; her imperfections showed character. If he had wanted a spoiled girl with silky smooth hands, he wouldn’t feel half of what he felt for Sango.

She seemed to be holding her breath, perhaps fearing that he would do something forward, like shower her hand with kisses. But he understood how difficult it was for her to place even this much trust in him, and was not about to ruin another moment by taking things too far too soon.

So he lowered their joined hands to rest on the grass between them, and turned to gaze out toward the horizon. Somehow the countryside seemed much more beautiful now. Eventually, he felt a slight pressure against his shoulder, and glanced over to find Sango leaning hesitantly against him, face flushed and eyes downcast. It was such a small thing, but again, she was trusting him with something that perhaps she had never trusted anyone with before. So he reciprocated gently, returning just enough pressure to keep their shoulders in contact.

Together they sat, watching the sunset and enjoying life in all of its strange twists and subtle nuances.

* * *

Bankotsu rolled his eyes inwardly. He liked Jakotsu, but the guy was incredibly overdramatic sometimes. He looked about ready to throw a full-blown tantrum, all because he wasn’t being allowed to go after his ‘precious Inuyasha’ again. That ability to focus single-mindedly on a single target was one of Jakotsu’s strengths, but it could also be a weakness, when that focus turned to obsession. As his infatuation with the hanyou was quickly becoming.

Bankotsu had gathered the remaining Shichinintai near the base of Mount Hakurei, inside the barrier. The overwhelming purity of the area was tough on them, but at least they would be safe. And he knew it had been the right call to summon everyone here, especially considering Jakotsu’s recklessness. Suikotsu would hopefully wake up soon, but Ginkotsu was in pieces. And of the three remaining members, one of them possessed a sword hastily-mended by some random peasant. Common sense dictated having one’s weapon repaired by a professional before taking it into battle again, but Jakotsu wasn’t really thinking with his head right now. Not that he was the most sensible guy under normal circumstances.

"Relax, Jakotsu," Bankotsu soothed, hoping to avoid pulling rank with his subordinate, something he hated doing at least in Jakotsu’s case. "You’ll still have plenty of fun. The new—"

"But oo-aniki," the effeminate man wined, "I like Inu—"

"I _know_ you like Inuyasha, Jakotsu," Bankotsu declared, his tone hardening just a little. "But Naraku has other enemies. One of them is sniffing around the barrier, and I need you to go test his strength."

"Ugh. Is he handsome, at least?" Jakotsu pondered, like a child torn between stubbornness and curiosity.

"That you’ll have to determine for yourself."

Jakotsu groaned, then crossed his arms over his chest and pursed out his lips in a full-blown pout. "I still don’t see why we can’t all go after Inuyasha and his stupid friends," he griped petulantly.

This time Bankotsu did roll his eyes. _Because if I let you anywhere near Inuyasha, I might never get the chance to fight him myself._ But that wasn’t the reason he gave his subordinate.

"We need to wait until Ginkotsu is repaired and Suikotsu is awake. And you need to have Renkotsu take a look at Jakotsutou."

"My sword is fine!" Jakotsu snapped defensively.

"Really? Unfold it then."

Jakotsu hesitated for a moment, then did as he was told. Bankotsu walked the length of the blade, studying every millimeter of metal. He easily located the joint which the blacksmith had fixed; the work was not shoddy by any means, but it was also not up to the standards of the Shichinintai. A lesson which Jakotsu would apparently have to learn the hard way. Bankotsu reared back and slammed his fist into the joint, in much the same way Inuyasha had done a few days earlier. The sword virtually exploded at the point of impact, the severed piece flopping uselessly onto its side as its owner let out an involuntary cry of horror.

After that, all it took was a raised eyebrow from Bankotsu to make Jakotsu hang his head and trudge off to see Renkotsu. The Shichinintai leader patted him amicably on the back as he passed, to show that there were no hard feelings. Again, he genuinely liked Jakotsu, unusual tendencies and all.

He picked up Banryuu and twirled it once in his hands. No sense in sitting here doing nothing; if he was going to face Inuyasha, he needed to train. The hanyou would have the advantages of speed and strength over him, just because of the way he was born. So Bankotsu’s technique needed to be superb, his swordsmanship overwhelming. The expert swordsman versus the powerful brute, a classic matchup if ever there was one. A battle Bankotsu knew he would win.

He thrust Banryuu forward with a blindingly quick movement and a sharp expulsion of air. And as he trained, his grin widened, his confidence growing with every strike. _Wash your neck and wait for me, Inuyasha._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I know everyone doesn’t share this opinion, but I think Kouga is a decent guy for the most part. I like to believe that his love for Kagome has changed his attitude toward humans in general. Here he takes some time to blow off steam and come to terms with Kagome’s decision, then regrets how their last meeting went and tries to find her again to set things right.


	16. The Barrier around Mount Hakurei

Kikyou landed softly on the grass outside the hut, her shinidamachu retreating to hover behind her as they always did. She paused for a moment to study the surrounding area, but could detect nothing unusual, other than the unnaturally strong purity of this place. It had grown steadily more intense the closer she came to Mount Hakurei, to the point of being significantly uncomfortable. It was hard to believe that this level of purity would not have affected her at all while she was alive. Now thanks to her artificial body, she felt physically ill.

She wanted to leave this place immediately, but she had not come here on a whim. This hut was seemingly innocent on the outside, but something sinister had occurred here. The light from a fragment of the Shikon no Tama had emanated from this place. She had been tracking it just a few minutes ago, as it flickered dangerously between purity and corruption, until at last the darkness took over. Soon after, the shard had moved rapidly toward Mount Hakurei until it suddenly vanished, and she could sense it no more.

Kikyou strode cautiously closer to the hut, moving in a circle to inspect the entire exterior. She froze as she rounded the corner and glimpsed the first sign of something amiss—the door smashed apart and lying in pieces strewn across the yard. It appeared that something had violently burst forth from inside the hut, with far greater power than the average human possessed. The sun was on the other side of the building now, casting the room in shadow. But Kikyou could see irregular shapes within, and what appeared to be dark stains on the floor. With a sinking feeling, she crept closer.

For once, Kikyou was glad not to be alive. Her clay body was incapable of vomiting, which was surely the natural human reaction to a scene such as this. At least two dozen people lay dead inside the hut, their blood leaving barely a square centimeter of floor unsullied. Some had started to decompose, but others appeared to have passed away quite recently. And as she gazed at the carnage, her lips pursing with fury, Kikyou began to comprehend what had occurred here. Whoever possessed the Shikon fragment had been locked in here with these corpses. Some had obviously been cared for by a doctor, though not one with very good medical supplies. There was a certain sense of desperation in the hastily wrapped bandages made out of spare cloth, the effort which had been expended to make the dying comfortable. She could almost picture the poor doctor, slowly losing himself to despair, as the Shikon no Tama drank in the sorrow and became corrupted beyond redemption.

Why said doctor possessed a shard in the first place was another matter. But someone had used this room as a place of torture, for healer and victims alike. These people had died in agony for some twisted end. Pure rage surged through Kikyou, and she slammed her fist against the wall. No, she was not the woman she used to be, selflessly devoting her life to a thankless profession for the sake of others. But nor could she condone the killing of innocent people. Whoever did this would answer for it.

One of her shinidamachu soared into the room, quickly capturing something which Kikyou had not noticed. The light of a soul, lingering around the body of a young woman, appearing perhaps thirteen or fourteen years of age. Kikyou beckoned the shinidamachu closer, and took the soul in her hands. It was agitated, haunted by pain and despair and refusing to accept death. Bitterness and anger, Kikyou knew these emotions well. She whispered to the soul, not to soothe, but to turn the girl’s hatred towards a new purpose. _Join with me, sweet child, and remain on this earth for a little longer._

Soon, the soul accepted her and she took it into her body. Then she departed from this horrible place, moving towards Mount Hakurei until it became too dangerous to proceed further, until the pressure of the pure energy was a great weight upon her shoulders. Another step, and the souls maintaining this artificial body would be drawn out. Cursing, Kikyou retreated. She would find a way through this barrier, no matter how long she had to search. Naraku would be made to pay for his crimes. She did not know if the dark hanyou had slaughtered the people in the hut, but he was surely behind it. Everything she had learned through her tireless pursuit had led her here, to this mountain. To this strange peak where any normal priestess would be able to go without difficulty, but which cruelly rejected her as an impure abomination.

Naraku was so close, yet so far.

* * *

Kagome raised her arms over her head and stretched, not caring if her blouse raised high enough to reveal a little bit of her slightly enlarged belly. She was _so_ glad to be on the road again, that she almost felt like skipping down the path. She settled for bouncy steps instead, so as to limit how foolish she looked. It had been a long recuperation at the temple, eight days to be exact, but the Inu-gang was finally at full strength again. They probably could have departed a day or two earlier, but Inuyasha wasn’t taking any chances. In the hanyou’s own words, ‘those bastards can wait until we’re damn good and ready.’ Now they were. And with their course taking them in their previous direction of travel, they didn’t think the next encounter with the Shichinintai would be long in coming.

But it was another, unexpected encounter which loomed ahead for the Inu-gang, in the form of several shinidamachu, quickly followed others bearing Kikyou herself. Inuyasha cursed under his breath as the snake-like creatures set her down a few meters away. If he had known that Kikyou was in the area, he would have gone off to confront her by himself to spare Kagome the trauma of facing her again. But Kikyou likely knew this, and apparently had no intention of letting her reincarnation off so easily.

"Still hauling your pregnant whore around, Inuyasha?" Kikyou sneered. "I had hoped that you would have come to your senses by now."

That small, involuntary noise of misery from Kagome caused Inuyasha to clench his jaw hard enough to crack a tooth. But though his stomach churned and sweat pooled on his brow, he felt in touch with his manly parts today. Somewhere between his harrowing fight against the Shichinintai, nearly losing Kagome, and growing ever closer to her during their stay in her time, he had finally discovered that he _did_ in fact possess the balls to answer Kikyou. Just not in front of everyone.

"You lot," he told his friends, without turning to face them. "Go make camp somewhere. I’ll be there soon."

Kikyou laughed mockingly, and started to say something before he silenced her with a glare. A combination of anger and sadness welled up inside, hardening his emotions. But still, he didn’t want to have it out with Kikyou unless it was just the two of them. He owed her that much, at least. He just prayed that his friends would understand and heed his request. They did begin to move away, some more reluctantly than others. He knew why Kagome lingered, why he could feel her huge brown eyes boring into the back of his head. She was afraid, terrified that he would go with Kikyou to hell, either willingly or by force. _Dammit, Kagome. You’re just gonna have to trust me. Please, trust me._

Finally, after an encouraging word from Sango, Kagome departed with the others. Inuyasha allowed himself a sigh of relief when they were gone, before straightening his shoulders again and firming his countenance. The sun shone brightly overhead, but his mood was grim. For Kagome’s sake, this could not keep happening every time she and Kikyou ran into each other. Inevitably they would, since they were pursuing the same enemy, even if Kikyou didn’t literally drop in on them as she had today. Somehow, Inuyasha needed to get his dead former love to back off. A daunting task, but one he would not shrink from. He had an unspoken vow to keep, after all.

"Kikyou," Inuyasha ground out, fighting to keep his voice level. "Stop calling Kagome a whore."

"Would you prefer a synonym?" she remarked casually. "Slattern or harlot, perhaps?"

"No! She’s not—"

"You are a fool, Inuyasha. Admit the truth."

"Dammit, Kikyou!" he shouted, before pulling back. He didn’t want to yell at her, but she was making it difficult to control himself. Something about hearing Kagome be insulted like that set his insides to boiling.

"Kagome is _not_ a whore, Kikyou," he continued more calmly, though still with fury simmering under the surface. "Do you know how many times she’s had…relations, in her entire life? Once. One fucking time. And you call her a whore?"

Kikyou studied him for a moment, seemingly surprised by his statement. Finally she scoffed. "I am not sure I believe you."

"Have I ever lied to you, Kikyou?" Inuyasha asked quietly, voice lowered with hurt. For once, Kikyou seemed to have no answer, and Inuyasha saw an opportunity for reconciliation. "When I tell you that I still care for you, do you doubt me?"

Kikyou’s eyes softened for just a moment, before grief and bitterness settled back in. "And if I ask when you might decide to honor your promise to me?"

Inuyasha grimaced. "Kikyou…"

"I thought as much," she snapped. "Why can you not see that this wh— _girl_ does not belong here? Whatever usefulness she presented to your quest is now lost. Everyone would be better off if—"

"You’re wrong, Kikyou," he stated firmly, cutting her off. "Kagome regained her spiritual energy. She’s as powerful a miko as she ever was."

The sense of pride in his tone seemed to take Kikyou aback. She glared accusingly at him, as if to demand how he could tell so blatant a lie. But something in his expression, in the smoldering of his amber eyes must have convinced her to hold her tongue. _Go ahead, Kikyou. Tell me I’m lying._

"Well, then," she hedged, clearly off balance. "I suppose even the Kami make mistakes occasionally."

Inuyasha found himself agreeing wholeheartedly. One of their greatest blunders had been allowing Kikyou’s soul to return to this world inside a body of clay and graveyard soil. All that had done was bring suffering and heartache, especially for the dead miko herself. More than anything else, he longed to see her at peace. But Kikyou was most certainly not at peace. He could see it in her eyes, as she recovered quickly from her shock. A storm of loathing brewed in those dark depths, and Inuyasha could only stand there helplessly waiting to be struck.

"Perhaps it was wrong of me to place all of the blame on my reincarnation, then. Perhaps her only crime is being overly willing to spread her legs. Tell me, Inuyasha, did you seduce her? Does the fault for your _one_ fornication lie with you?!"

"It was an accident, Kikyou," he blurted out, unable to stomach the idea of her believing him to have betrayed her in such a manner. If he _had_ seduced Kagome, then Kikyou would have every right to hate him for it. And that was something he simply couldn’t handle. He didn’t know exactly what he wanted from her, but it wasn’t hatred.

"Explain," she ordered curtly.

Inuyasha gulped, suddenly realizing how foolish this was going to sound. "W-we were at a celebration one night, drinking sake…and we both drank too much. It…just sort of happened. Neither of us even remember it."

Kikyou studied him briefly before glancing away with a grim smile. The look of outright superiority she adopted forced Inuyasha to wonder if telling her the truth had been the right thing to do. Would it have been better to simply take the blame upon himself? That would likely have stopped Kikyou from abusing Kagome because she thought the latter had seduced him, which had been his primary goal in having this discussion. But now he couldn’t help but feel that he’d betrayed Kagome in some way, by telling Kikyou more than she needed to know.

"I wasn’t aware that you drank," Kikyou observed quietly, now seemingly in a much better mood.

"Of course you weren’t!" Inuyasha snapped, frustration and guilt bubbling forth in the form of bitter anger. "You think I would ever allow myself to drink in your presence? I always had to be careful what I did or said around you."

Kikyou gazed at him in disbelief mixed with a twinge of hurt, and Inuyasha was tempted to try to retract his statement. But he was too pissed off to care that he’d wounded Kikyou’s feelings. What he said was completely true; he had never really felt comfortable with showing Kikyou his true self. Even when they were alone, they never fully removed the masks they wore for the rest of the world. And that was one of the primary reasons why it had been so easy for Naraku to trick them. But dredging up the past would do no good. In fact, the prospect of leaving and getting back to his friends suddenly seemed very appealing. He had accomplished his objective, though in a fairly asinine way, and was ready to end this.

Without waiting for prompting, he began to tell Kikyou of the Shichinintai, which she would probably run into if she hadn’t already. The knowledge might prove helpful to her, and he considered it part of his duty to protect her when he could. When he was finished, Kikyou informed him of the barrier around Mount Hakurei, and how only those with purely human bodies and souls would be able to pass. Inuyasha easily inferred from her irritation that Kikyou had been denied entrance. When she was finished, he thanked her for the information and departed. All in all, their entire conversation had taken less than fifteen minutes. But still Inuyasha felt weary, as though he’d fought a difficult battle. It was always a mental strain to see Kikyou these days.

By contrast, his heart lightened with every step he took towards Kagome. She stood as he approached, not concealing her happiness, and his lips quirked into a tentative grin despite his remorse. The rest of his friends seemed pleasantly surprised by his appearance, but they also had not started to set up camp yet, perhaps because they hoped that he would return quickly as promised. For once, no one seemed upset with him in the slightest, which was an entirely new development when it came to his relationship with Kikyou. He decided he could get used to this, but knew it wasn’t likely to remain the status quo. The next time he went off to see Kikyou simply because she called for him, he would surely get the cold shoulder again. But that was apparently a worry for another day.

Kagome watched him as he led them back to the road. He had seemed genuinely happy to be back, and wasn’t brooding miserably as he sometimes did after Kikyou came around. But still, he was distracted, and Kagome could tell that something was bothering him. She wanted to ask, to see if maybe she could make him feel better. But she wasn’t sure if he would appreciate the interest or if he would brush her off. In the past, the answer would have been obvious. But she liked to think that he was a little more open with her now. And if he did desire to be left alone, she would try not to take offense.

So she sidled up next to him, close but not touching. Inuyasha glanced over at her as if to wonder what she was doing, but neither commented nor moved away. Kagome took that as a sign that he wasn’t automatically opposed to talking with her.

"Are you okay, Inuyasha?"

The brief flash of guilt in his eyes caused a dull dread to settle in Kagome’s stomach, but she vowed not to jump to conclusions. Perhaps she was imagining things; Inuyasha was now frowning and staring straight ahead, as if debating whether or not to open up.

"I’m fine, wench," he finally replied.

Kagome nodded and folded her hands in front of her, trying to conceal her disappointment. She respected Inuyasha’s privacy, but had really hoped that he would _choose_ to share his emotions with her. Then again, it wasn’t unusual for him to be somewhat withdrawn after meeting with Kikyou. He would come out of his shell again, sooner or later. And she would be there waiting for him.

"It’s just hard…to see her like that," he continued suddenly, causing Kagome’s head to snap around. His grimace had taken on an edge of sorrow, and the young miko saw just how difficult it was for him to interact with Kikyou in such a manner. Because he hadn’t just stood there and let her berate him today. No, this time he had fought back; she could tell from his tone of voice, his body language as she left him there with Kikyou. Today, Inuyasha had risen to her defense. It warmed her heart, but also saddened and infuriated her that a former love would force him to go to such lengths.

"Thank you, Inuyasha. For doing that for me."

"Keh!" he snapped, fueled once more by righteous anger. "She shouldn’t be saying that shit about you."

Kagome looked away to hide her light blush. Inuyasha’s fierce response had instantly elevated her heartbeat, in a good way. He was always protective of her, but this was different. Rather than her physical well-being, this was concerning her feelings and honor, and it was not any rogue youkai he was standing up to. It was _Kikyou_ , the woman who still somehow retained his loyalty and devotion despite how she’d treated him since her resurrection. It should have been a given that Inuyasha would come to her defense, even against Kikyou, but Kagome had learned that nothing was guaranteed where the dead miko was involved.

"I don’t think she’ll be calling you… _that,_ anymore."

Something in his tone caused Kagome’s brow to furrow. She found him gazing at her nervously, as if he’d accidentally said more than he should have. He probably wanted her to let it go, but there was no way that was going to happen with her curiosity peaked as it was.

"Why do you say that?" she asked.

There was that guilt again, and this time Kagome knew she wasn’t imagining things. That feeling of dread returned, stronger than before. She was positive she wasn’t going to like the next words out of his mouth.

"I, uh…told her how you got pregnant."

Kagome didn’t react immediately; she simply wasn’t sure how to feel. On the one hand, it could be argued that Kikyou deserved to know. She and Inuyasha had nearly been married; she was much more of a love interest to the hanyou than Kouga had ever been to herself. But on the other hand, she had been willing to lie to Kouga about the conception of their child, or perhaps not tell him the whole truth. Yet, Inuyasha was not willing to do the same with Kikyou. What did that say? She shook her head. Maybe it didn’t say anything. Inuyasha had promised to stay with her, and Kikyou knew…she did know about his promise, didn’t she? Kagome was almost afraid to ask.

"Did you tell her that you promised to stay with me?"

Inuyasha’s look of panic told her everything she needed to know. If she was reading him correctly, his expression was one of a man who had forgotten to do something important, rather than someone caught neglecting said task on purpose. So perhaps he hadn’t deliberately avoided discussing that tender subject with Kikyou. That didn’t make her feel much better. What must Kikyou be thinking right now? That not only were Inuyasha and her reincarnation _not_ a couple, but that he hadn’t made any sort of formal commitment to her at all. Kikyou was probably quite pleased with the news. The fact that Inuyasha had allowed her to entertain these delusions hurt. A lot. Kagome suddenly found that she needed a change of company.

Without a word, she drifted back to walk beside Sango and Miroku. Inuyasha could only stare after her, at least until he noticed Sango glaring at him. The taijiya probably hadn’t heard all of their discussion, but given Kagome’s sudden shift in mood, she blamed him automatically. Unfortunately, in this case she was absolutely right.

* * *

Inuyasha kicked at a stone and watched it roll down the path. If only all of life’s little problems were so easy to get rid of. Once again, he repeated in his head the question which had occupied his thoughts for the past hour.

How exactly had he managed to fuck this up?

It seemed impossible, a logical paradox. He had finally stood up to Kikyou, told her point blank to stop insulting Kagome. That should automatically put him in good standing with the latter miko, shouldn’t it? Perhaps that assumption would make sense, but for a couple minor details. It also made logical sense that what he actually _told_ Kikyou would determine how Kagome felt. Too bad that little element of wisdom hadn’t occurred to him until it was too late.

The thing that really annoyed him here was that none of his mistakes were intentional. Informing Kikyou of the nature of his child’s conception had been a knee-jerk decision, and he honestly hadn’t thought to bring up his commitment to Kagome. He hadn’t purposely given Kikyou a selective version of events which favored her and belittled his relationship with Kagome. Yet, somehow it had happened anyway. What really mystified him was why. The conception thing he could brush off, and Kagome probably would have done the same _if_ he had made clear to Kikyou where he stood on the matter of going to hell with her. And there had been plenty of opportunity to do just that. It just hadn’t occurred to him.

Inuyasha felt very stupid. He knew he could be dense at times, but he wouldn’t have believed himself to be dumb enough to forget something that important. But was a simple lapse in memory really the cause of all this? Or was there something deeper? People could probably blot out things they didn’t want to remember, even subconsciously. He was sure that enlightening Kikyou as to his new commitments would be extremely unpleasant. Maybe his brain had conveniently misplaced that thread of memory for a few minutes, in an accidentally-on-purpose sort of way.

Whatever the psychological machinations, he resolved to correct his error the next time he saw Kikyou. Even if he had to write a message on his hand or get it tattooed on his forehead. He just hoped that Kagome would start talking to him again before then. He certainly wasn’t going to approach her now, what with her brooding silently and the rest of his friends favoring him with varying degrees of the icy treatment. He sighed heavily. It took a special kind of idiot to mess up something which should have been a guaranteed success.

A special kind, indeed.

A short while later, however, Inuyasha’s mood suddenly brightened. There was nothing better to take one’s mind off of an emotional screw-up than a good fight. The scents of corpse and graveyard soil were on the breeze, and the heavy sounds of machinery in motion could be heard growing every closer. The Shichinintai were coming out to play. Inuyasha cracked his knuckles, eagerly anticipating the opportunity to take out some his frustration on the enemy.

A chorus of gasps rang out behind him as the Shichinintai crested a nearby rise, and even Inuyasha had to blink in shock. Three relatively normal-looking humans rode atop what could only be adequately described as a tank, and even then only by the sole member of the group familiar with modern armored vehicles. Only the head and torso remained from Ginkotsu’s formerly humanoid form. Around it a squat body had been constructed, supported by giant saw-like wheels. Behind his head loomed a massive double-barreled swivel cannon. Overall, he was the single most technologically advanced piece of machinery that anyone hailing from the feudal era had ever seen.

"You lot," Inuyasha told the others. "Get on Kirara and get in the air. Don’t go anywhere near that gun."

No one protested this directive; they too sensed how dangerous the cannon could be to someone not blessed with superhuman reflexes. Kagome’s weapon was most effective from a distance anyway, and Sango could fight in close and at range. So even if the Shichinintai decided to attack him en masse, he wouldn’t be completely bereft of backup. But crucially, his human friends had to prioritize their own safety so he could prioritize his. Satisfied with their battle alignment, he drew Tetsusaiga and waited.

Ginkotsu rumbled to a halt twenty or thirty meters away, and a man hopped down and stood regarding Inuyasha silently, leaning his massive halberd against his shoulder. _This must be Bankotsu, the leader_ , Inuyasha deduced, by process of elimination. Jakotsu was nowhere to be seen, and Renkotsu was atop Ginkotsu. Also, Suikotsu’s claws and clothing gave him away, though his face was unrecognizable from that of the ‘good doctor.’ That left only Bankotsu, the youngest and most formidable member of the Shichinintai, according to the villager Yuu. The one who, like Inuyasha, was said to wield a mighty blade with ease through strength of will alone. Looking at him now, the hanyou didn’t doubt it. But there was something else about Bankotsu which caused the hairs on the back of his neck to stand on end. It wasn’t that arrogant smirk, or the supreme confidence which exuded from the man. Inuyasha was unable to put his finger on it until he heard Kagome’s shout.

"Inuyasha! That guy has three jewel shards in his neck!"

Inuyasha nodded, not surprised. He couldn’t see the Shikon no Tama, but when an enemy was using the power of three shards, even he would notice the difference in aura.

"Clever girl," Bankotsu observed, almost conversationally. "Yes, I borrowed Kyoukotsu’s and Mukotsu’s shares. It will make it that much sweeter when I avenge them."

"You bastards have had your own way until now," Inuyasha snarled, drawing the enemy’s attention. "I’m going to send you back to your graves."

Bankotsu grinned. "You must be Inuyasha. There are very few men alive who can claim to have survived an encounter with Jakotsu, and none save you who have escaped him twice. I’ve been waiting to test my skills against the man who bested the Shichinintai’s attack captain. Don’t disappoint me!"

Bankotsu charged, and Inuyasha could at least appreciate that the man didn’t like to beat around the bush. Less talking and more fighting was perfectly fine with him. Tetsusaiga and Banryuu came together in a mighty clash, each combatant swinging diagonally from right to left so that the swords formed a large cross at impact. Inuyasha applied more force, intending to throw his opponent back, but to his surprise Bankotsu was able to hold his ground. Due to the three jewel shards in his neck, it appeared that the leader of the Shichinintai was nearly his equal in terms of pure strength. Bankotsu pulled back and swung his halberd in a lateral arc. Just as Inuyasha blocked the blow, his opponent whirled Banryuu over his head and struck from the other direction. The hanyou blocked that attack, as well as all of the others which followed. After several dozen blows, Bankotsu paused and regarded his panting enemy with a smirk.

"Is that all you’ve got, half-breed?"

Inuyasha narrowed his eyes, but did not rise to the bait. So far, he had been relegated to fighting defensively, due to Bankotsu’s superior swordsmanship. But over the many battles he and Tetsusaiga had fought together, he’d learned that his father’s heirloom was not a club. He wasn’t a master swordsman by any means, but he could fight with some technique too.

The battle resumed, with Inuyasha the aggressor this time. Watching from above, Kagome tried not to flinch with every clang of steel on steel. Inuyasha was holding his own, and in fact appeared to be having a much easier time with Bankotsu than he had against Jakotsu. Probably because the former’s fighting style was much more akin to his own.

"Oi, oi," came a taunting shout from below. "What are you cowards doing up there? Come down and face me."

It was Suikotsu, who had advanced to stand almost directly underneath them. The mercenary glared up at them with a level of bloodlust rivaled only by his absent comrade. Kagome eyed Ginkotsu and Renkotsu warily, who had not moved from their original position. At this distance, Kirara would be able to avoid the shells if that large cannon was fired. If they moved much closer, that might no longer be the case.

Suikotsu shrugged and started walking towards where Inuyasha and Bankotsu were having it out. Obviously, he intended to get his satisfaction at the hanyou’s expense if no one else would accept his challenge. And with Inuyasha hard-pressed already, Sango knew she had to do something.

"Let me down, Kirara."

"Be careful, Sango," Miroku told her.

The taijiya grinned confidently as Kirara descended. "I’ll be fine, Houshi-sama. I won’t let him draw me in close to that gun."

Miroku nodded, relieved that Sango understood the situation. If Suikotsu suddenly moved away or was killed, Sango might have to avoid a cannon blast on foot.

"A woman?" Suikotsu pondered as the taijiya approached, appearing genuinely amused by the prospect. "That’s new. I’ve killed many women before, but never fought one. Should be fun!"

He charged, and Sango drew her katana, wielding it with her right hand as she held hiraikotsu in her left, using it as a shield. Miroku’s concerns that Sango wasn’t up for this were quickly dispelled; she moved fluidly without any sign of being hampered by the poison. She appeared to be hesitant to use her injured right hand too much, but that could be construed simply as a defensive-oriented fighting style. Suikotsu apparently hadn’t noticed anything out of the ordinary. Although the mercenary was physically stronger than she was and sported fierce weapons, Sango was able to block or parry his strikes and launch a few of her own. Nevertheless, Miroku watched her closely, his heart in his throat. And with Kagome engrossed in observing both battles, prepared to fire an arrow if necessary, it was very fortunate that at least Kirara was paying attention to the danger.

All of her riders nearly became dislodged when she suddenly dropped several meters in the air. Kagome lost her arrow but managed to save her bow. She quickly drew another projectile as Miroku snatched Shippou out of the air by his tail. Yet, no one complained about the rough ride, thanks to the shell which soared through the space where they’d just been and exploded when it impacted the ground several hundred meters behind them. Kirara surged ahead to dodge the second shell, and again everyone struggled to hang on. After that, they kept one eye on Ginkotsu at all times. Renkotsu had reloaded the gun and seemed to have no qualms about expending more ammunition.

Inuyasha spared a glance to make sure his friends were all right, and as a result was caught wrong-footed by Bankotsu’s overhead slash. He caught it on Tetsusaiga, then tilted his sword so the halberd slid off to the side. He followed with a quick counterstrike, which Bankotsu blocked with Banryuu.

CRACK!!!

That foreboding sound caused both combatants to pause for a moment, as one’s eyes widened in alarm, and the other’s narrowed in anticipation. Banryuu and Tetsusaiga had clashed literally hundreds of times over the past several minutes. Bankotsu had used three shards of the Shikon no Tama to make his body more or less equal to Inuyasha’s in terms of strength and stamina. But crucially, his sword possessed no shards, nothing to boost its natural resiliency. And no human sword could hope to match Tetsusaiga on its own for very long.

Flush with exhilaration, Inuyasha went on the offensive, targeting Banryuu with powerful swings of Tetsusaiga. Bankotsu tried to dodge where he could, but he was forced to block with the halberd more often than not. The small cracks in Banryuu multiplied, and Inuyasha knew that it was only a matter of time before the sword shattered and Bankotsu fell under his blade. Unfortunately, he wasn’t the only one who realized this.

It was a combination of Kagome’s cry of warning and his own sense of imminent danger which allowed Inuyasha to avoid the dual shells fired at him. He charged through the dust cloud kicked up by the explosions, to find Bankotsu high-tailing it toward Ginkotsu. Suikotsu was retreating as well; in fact, the entire Shichinintai seemed ready to withdraw.

As if Inuyasha would allow that. He charged after them, only to skid to a halt when a giant white form appeared directly in his path.

"Kukuku, Inuyasha. It’s been a while, hasn’t it?"

"Naraku!"

He had to leap back reflexively to avoid the tentacles which sought to impale him through the chest. But this Naraku was probably just a puppet, sent to grant the Shichinintai time to escape.

"I don’t have time to fuck around with you!" Inuyasha cried, launching a Kaze no Kizu. The rippling blades of youki decimated the puppet, and the entire body dispersed to the winds.

Inuyasha wasted no time in pursuing his prey. There they were, just up ahead. Ginkotsu moved faster than a human could run, but he could never hope to outpace the hanyou. Soon he had closed to within thirty meters of them. He had to dodge a couple hastily fired shells, but it wouldn’t matter. He would obliterate the whole lot of them long before they had a chance to fire again.

Then, all of a sudden, the Shichinintai vanished. One moment they were there, and the next there was only grassland and forest stretching out before him. Inuyasha faltered in his stride but quickly regained it, determined to smash through whatever illusion the cowards had used. Then hostile energy crackled around him, the very air seemingly repulsed by his presence. His pace slowed as the resistance became more intense, until finally he gave up and drew to a halt. This wasn’t an illusion. It was the barrier around Mount Hakurei.

He heard Kirara growl in pain, and turned to see her landing nearby, maintaining her larger form just long enough for her riders to slide off. Shippou wobbled on his feet, his eyes unfocused. But what caused panic to settle in Inuyasha’s gut was the way Kagome’s hand rested over her belly as she looked down at herself in concern. In moments he was by her side, asking if she and the baby were okay.

"We’re both fine, Inuyasha," she answered, clearly more confused than worried. "He doesn’t like this, but it isn’t hurting him."

"Yet," Miroku interjected grimly. "If you were to proceed further, Kagome-sama, I doubt your child would escape purification."

"Why, Miroku-sama? What is this?"

"It’s a barrier," Inuyasha replied, remembering what Kikyou had told him. Between his own failings and receiving the cold shoulder, he hadn’t had a chance to bring the others up to speed. But the pieces were falling into place now. The great evil which had passed over these parts and then vanished without a trace. The band of human mercenaries resurrected with the power of the Shikon no Tama, and using Mount Hakurei as a safe haven. Naraku’s puppet, sent to protect the Shichinintai. The final bit of evidence came when Kagome declared that said puppet had been unusual, emanating a pure aura. Finally, Inuyasha could come to only one conclusion: Naraku was inside the barrier. His friends gazed at him in shock when he told them, but they soon solved the puzzle for themselves. No one spoke for several minutes, as each person came to terms with this new development.

"If you think about it," Miroku observed, voice tinged with frustration, "once inside the barrier, Naraku could find no safer place to hide. Most of his pursuers possess youkai blood. And without even realizing it, he has blocked Kagome-sama out as well. The only ones who can go after him now are Sango and myself, though this intense purity is uncomfortable even for me."

Sango snorted. "Well, since I’m perfectly fine, that must mean you’re rather _impure_ , Houshi-sama."

Miroku shrugged and adopted an innocent expression. "At any rate, only a human of incredible skill and purity could erect a barrier of this magnitude."

"Bah, probably just some idiot who got tricked or blackmailed by Naraku," Inuyasha retorted. "We’ll find a way in."

One by one, his friends nodded in agreement. This was just another obstacle on the path to destroying Naraku. Nothing the dark hanyou had thrown at them thus far had managed to stop them for long, and this effort would likewise fail. No matter what, their determination would not waver. Naraku could hide, but he could never truly escape.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I emphasized the superiority of Tetsusaiga over Banryuu here more than the manga did. In canon, it’s the Kaze no Kizu which scars Banryuu. But it was also a very short battle. I think that if Inuyasha and Bankotsu traded more blows, the strength of Tetsusaiga would naturally win out. Banryuu is only a human sword, after all. I’m not following the 1,000 humans and 1,000 youkai transformation thing that the anime did.


	17. Friendship

"Damn half-breed," Bankotsu grumbled under his breath, still fuming. He wanted so badly to kill Inuyasha for what he’d done, but the hanyou had left him with nothing to fight with. A few more good whacks to Banryuu, and his prized sword would disintegrate into harmless shards of metal. There would be no repairing it, either; the only option would be to have Renkotsu melt it down and reforge it, a lengthy and painstaking process. The wait would be excruciating, but Bankotsu refused to fight with anything other than his Banryuu. The two of them were like brothers, inseparable since the day the latter had been forged. And Inuyasha had nearly destroyed that.

This offense went straight to the top of Bankotsu’s list of reasons for taking revenge on the cursed hanyou. And it was so frustrating to him, because he _knew_ he could beat Inuyasha if their swords were equal. The hanyou was slightly better with a blade than anticipated, but nowhere near as proficient as the man capable of leading the vaunted Shichinintai. But that sword…that youkai blade he wielded was quite possibly the strongest sword in existence. How had a half-breed ended up with such a weapon? And why on earth would such a mighty blade choose such an unworthy master?

Asking questions like that wouldn’t help, Bankotsu knew. He should be carefully considering his next moves. Above all else, he had to maintain the aura of invincibility which had kept his comrades in line to this point. Because the Shichinintai were hard men; they would only follow a strong leader. And if Bankotsu showed any sign of weakness, his subordinates might start _thinking_ , which was never a good thing. Renkotsu already did too much of that, though at least he knew his place. In the past, that is. Now, Bankotsu wasn’t sure. Ultimately, there was only one person in the entire world he could truly trust, and that person wasn’t here.

Two figures materialized out of the mist before them, one Bankotsu recognized and one who was new to him, a young girl who was completely white except for haunting pitch black eyes.

"Yo, Kohaku," he greeted casually, as if nothing was amiss. One of the first rules of leadership: let them think that nothing fazes you.

"Bankotsu-sama," the young man replied in that boring monotone of his.

"What’s your story, kid?" Bankotsu asked the strange girl, cracking a smirk. "Your oyaji fuck a Yuki-onna or something?" His comrades chuckled behind him, a sound which the head mercenary was glad to hear. His mirth vanished when the girl spoke, however.

"Bankotsu’s halberd cannot defeat Inuyasha’s sword."

"What did you say?!" he snarled, lifting the brat up by the front of her robes and shaking her. Still, the little shit-stain didn’t even blink. She just stared at him, as if she was physically incapable of feeling fear, or anything at all.

"Bankotsu-sama," Kohaku interjected, "Kanna is here to help. Please allow her to examine Banryuu."

Bankotsu growled in annoyance, but he was smart enough to know that their mysterious benefactor wouldn’t appreciate having his minions disemboweled. And until the situation was clearer and Inuyasha’s group was dead, they had to keep Naraku happy. So he dropped Kanna back on her feet and drove Banryuu’s tip into the ground about a centimeter from her toes. The strange girl placed her hand on the blade and was silent for several moments.

"It can become much stronger," she finally declared, turning to gaze at Renkotsu. The fire-user seemed surprised, but it was the sudden panic in his expression which caught Bankotsu’s attention. It didn’t take him long to figure out what Kanna was alluding to, since he’d already had his suspicions.

"So you were holding out on me after all, eh Renkotsu?" he demanded.

"What are you talking about?"

Bankotsu grinned menacingly. In the next instant, Banryuu’s tip was less than half a meter from Renkotsu’s lying throat.

"You told me that you bargained with Inuyasha for your life," he declared, eyeing the other man with unconcealed threat in his gaze. "But you managed to weasel the Shikon fragments out of him too, didn’t you? Now hand them over. Or shall I take the shard in your neck right here?"

Time seemed to stand still as the two adversaries stared at each other. Bankotsu could see the wheels turning in Renkotsu’s head, as the fire-user sized him up. _Go ahead, Renkotsu. Try me. My Banryuu may be damaged, but I don’t need it to squash the likes of you._ Finally, his subordinate’s eyes lowered in defeat, and he drew the bottle of jewel shards from his robes and tossed it in the air. Bankotsu caught it in one hand, whistling appreciatively. Another important rule of leadership: never let a challenge to your authority go unchastised.

"That’s a good boy, Renkotsu," he sneered. "You’re smart after all. Just don’t think there will be a second chance."

"Understood," Renkotsu muttered, and Bankotsu knew he had gotten his point across. They were all on notice now, not just Renkotsu. If anyone disobeyed him again, he wouldn’t hesitate to kill them. And crucially, he was about to regain whatever respect he’d lost in the battle against Inuyasha. Eyes glowing with excitement, he crushed the glass bottle in his hand and thrust the shards into an especially large crack in Banryuu’s surface. The transformation was instantaneous; Banryuu practically _roared_ with renewed vigor, as every chip and crack magically healed. Bankotsu rejoiced; his brother was whole again, and more powerful than ever. And it could _still_ become stronger.

"You three," he told his subordinates, "go find and eliminate that pesky wolf-youkai, Kouga. Take the shards from his legs and bring them to me."

No one said a word as they departed, and Bankotsu was satisfied that the three of them had been properly subdued. They would bring him Kouga’s shards like the well-trained dogs they were. Even without the two additional fragments, Inuyasha was as good as dead. _Yes, we will kill all of Naraku’s enemies for him. And if he decides to betray us to get his shards back, then perhaps I’ll have a little something to say about it._ Speaking of Naraku, the child minions were still here.

"Bankotsu-sama, take this."

"Hm?" He turned to see Kohaku holding out a golden rod, rounded in the middle and topped at either end with what looked almost like large spear points.

"It will prove useful against Inuyasha," the boy responded to his unanswered question. Shrugging, Bankotsu took the strange object and placed it in his robes. Anything that might help him defeat that damn hanyou was welcome. But right now he was more concerned about something else.

"So where’s Jakotsu?" he asked.

"Jakotsu-sama is not far from here," Kohaku replied. "He was wounded by Sesshoumaru."

"Show me," Bankotsu ordered, concealing his concern behind a mask of neutrality. The boy did so, leading the head mercenary on a trek which only took ten minutes but felt much longer to Bankotsu. He found Jakotsu in a sorry state, lying propped up against some rocks with his clothing cut to shreds and a gaping wound in his side. A large chunk of his torso was literally gone, the frayed edges fluttering in the breeze. Bankotsu immediately knew that this was a wound which would not heal. At least not on its own.

"Oo-aniki," Jakotsu greeted weakly, gazing at him adoringly. Like a man looking up at a brother from his deathbed.

"Leave us, Kohaku," Bankotsu snapped. The boy did not need to be told twice. No longer hiding his emotions, Bankotsu knelt by his friend’s side and drew one of the jewel shards from Banryuu’s blade. It was probably just his imagination, but even the sword seemed to agree with his decision. Then he placed the shard to Jakotsu’s wound and watched as the flesh gradually regenerated, until only unblemished skin remained.

Jakotsu sat up and ran his hands over his new flesh, stretching and twisting as if he couldn’t believe his good fortune. Then he raised his head to regard Bankotsu with amazement and gratitude shining in his eyes.

"Oo-aniki…why?"

Bankotsu shrugged, figuring that Jakotsu should know the answer by now. Yes, the shard would have made Banryuu that much stronger. Yes, he could have put it to better use than Jakotsu could. Yes, giving it to Jakotsu as opposed to keeping it himself lessened the Shichinintai’s chances of surviving against their enemies, Naraku included. No, he didn’t give a shit.

"Making Banryuu a little weaker is a small price to pay for your life," he told his friend. "You’re the only one I can trust, Jakotsu."

Jakotsu appeared ready to either hug him or start crying. Fortunately he did neither, though he did continue to look deliriously happy.

"So what happened?" Bankotsu asked him, changing the subject.

Jakotsu sighed. "I wasn’t careful enough. I only escaped because of the barrier. He was so freakin’ fast! I’ve never seen anyone dodge Jakotsutou so easily. Eh, but he was kind of a snob. Handsome enough, but definitely not my type."

Bankotsu smiled and shook his head. If Jakotsu was feeling well enough to start expounding on his tastes in men, then he was going to be fine.

"So what do you want me to do now?"

Bankotsu stared at his companion. It was an honest question, with no hint of a negative attitude. _He would go right back and fight Sesshoumaru again if I asked him to._ Out of his six subordinates, only Jakotsu showed him such loyalty. But he was truly fortunate to have even one such friend.

"Rest for a bit, or train with Jakotsutou," he said. "I sent the others to hunt down the wolf-youkai, and I’m going after Inuyasha again." Bankotsu glanced over and was not surprised to find his companion pouting. "Oi, you had two shots at him. It’s only fair that I get two chances, ne?"

Even Jakotsu couldn’t deny that logic, though he obviously didn’t like it.

"How about this," Bankotsu proposed, seeking to lighten his friend’s mood. "If Inuyasha manages to beat me again, I’ll give you the extra jewel shards and you can have another go at him."

Jakotsu brightened immediately. "You really mean it?"

"Yeah, and after Inuyasha’s dead, the two of us will go deal with that stuck-up bastard you didn’t like. You and me, Jakotsu. Just the two of us. Like the old days, okay?"

Jakotsu sighed wistfully. "Those were good days."

Bankotsu nodded, his grin fading with determination. He did not desire the deaths of the other members of the Shichinintai, but he was a realist. He and Jakotsu were by far the strongest of the seven, and given the skill of their opponents, it could very well end up that only the two of them survived. But no matter what he had to do, or whom he had to sacrifice, he would make sure Jakotsu made it out of this alive.

True loyalty went both ways.

* * *

Inuyasha skidded to a halt, halting his backward momentum and charging forward again. Bankotsu met his attack with Banryuu, still wearing the same cocky smirk he’d sported since emerging from the barrier a few minutes ago. The mercenary had apparently come alone, for which Inuyasha was glad since it allowed his friends to observe from the sidelines. He didn’t want Sango to have to fight again until her hand was fully healed, especially in a lengthy battle. And this engagement was going to take some time. Bankotsu’s body was as strong and quick as before, and his sword now possessed the endurance to challenge Tetsusaiga, courtesy of the jewel shards Renkotsu had blackmailed from them. One thing Inuyasha was learning about the Shichinintai—they were a slippery bunch, and if you didn’t get them the first time, they came back more dangerous.

With his opponent’s previous advantages neutralized, Bankotsu’s superior swordsmanship was starting to tell. Inuyasha was forced to leap to avoid an overhand strike from Banryuu, but in the blink of an eye Bankotsu reversed his grip and swung laterally. Inuyasha blocked with Tetsusaiga, but his arms shook with the force of the blow and he was knocked backward again. Instead of charging in, however, the hanyou paused. He had been waiting for an opportune moment in order to use this technique, and it looked like it was time. Thus far, only Ginkotsu and Renkotsu had seen his Kaze no Kizu, and that one hadn’t been anywhere near full strength. Bankotsu wouldn’t know what hit him. The bastard was still grinning arrogantly, but wouldn’t be for much longer.

As the waves of Tetsusaiga’s youki closed rapidly on his position, Bankotsu leapt into the air, twirling Banryuu over his head with blinding speed. Then, just at the moment of impact, he smashed the Kaze no Kizu away with a dazzling series of lightning strikes. Inuyasha could only stare dumbfounded for a moment, a lapse in concentration which nearly cost him his life. As it was, he just barely managed to catch the incoming Banryuu on his blade. Bankotsu leaned in close, eyes alive with mirth.

"What’re you so surprised for, half-breed? Did you think a weak attack like that would be enough to defeat me?"

Inuyasha snarled and exerted more force, seeking to push his enemy off balance. Bankotsu reciprocated, and the two of them remained locked together in a deadly contest of strength. But this was a combat style which Inuyasha embraced. Pure power on power; no fancy swordsmanship or cheap tricks. Or so he thought.

A golden blur shot out from Bankotsu’s robes and impacted Tetsusaiga with a loud _clang_. The sword howled in pain, then transformed into its rustic state. Fortunately, Bankotsu appeared just as shocked by this turn of events as Inuyasha, which allowed the hanyou to scramble back and put some distance between himself and his opponent.

"What the fuck just happened?!" he demanded, to no one in particular.

"Inuyasha!" Miroku called. "That is a dokko, a holy object used by monks. It must belong to whoever erected the barrier!"

"Oh, that makes sense," Bankotsu observed conversationally. "Kohaku said it would prove useful against you, Inuyasha. Now I see why." He smirked, digging his heels into the ground in preparation for an attack.

"Bastard," Inuyasha snapped, wielding only the now dormant Tetsusaiga as protection. "Using a dirty trick like that."

"Fool!" Bankotsu cried as he charged, Banryuu poised for the killing blow. "There are no dirty tricks in a fight to the death!"

Inuyasha was still mentally debating whether to dodge or attempt to block Banryuu with his rusty katana when a pink light soared in from the side. It might have struck Bankotsu around the neck area, were it not for his right arm swinging his sword forward and inadvertently intercepting it. A fortuitous coincidence for him, but still the purifying arrow proved devastating to the affected area. Nothing remained of Bankotsu’s forearm except the two major bones, and the mercenary turned a hateful glare toward the one who had wounded him so. 

"You bitch," he snarled.

"Coward!" Kagome shouted back defiantly, even as she readied another arrow.

Inuyasha sent a mental ‘thank you’ her way and prepared to resume the battle. With Bankotsu’s injury, he wouldn’t be able to swing Banryuu with his full strength. Even the rusty Tetsusaiga could probably handle the pressure now, and Inuyasha didn’t need his sword to destroy the mercenary’s body. His claws would suffice for that. The mysterious holy person had turned the tables on him, but Kagome had turned them right back. Now Bankotsu was going to die.

Evidently, whoever was pulling the strings realized this as well. The dokko flew towards Bankotsu, enveloping the surprised mercenary in white light which caused his body to grow more transparent by the second. Inuyasha sprinted forward, seeking to catch his enemy before he disappeared, but was painfully repulsed by a barrier. He landed in a crouch, and could only watch helplessly as Bankotsu and the dokko vanished without a trace.

"Dammit!" he swore, punching the ground in frustration. He was getting _really_ tired of these bastards slipping through his fingers. But at least the enemy had come out of this battle the worse for wear; neither Inuyasha nor any of his friends had received any significant injuries.

"Are you okay, Inuyasha?" Kagome asked as she knelt by his side. The answer was obvious, but he didn’t berate her for posing the unnecessary question. She almost always asked if he was all right after a battle, didn’t she? For a long time after they met, he hadn’t appreciated her constant concern for his well-being. But he did now.

"I’m fine. Thanks, Kagome," he replied quietly so only she would hear. If she asked, he would say his expression of gratitude was for the arrow she’d fired, but he was thankful for much more than that. He wasn’t looking at her, but he could sense her smile, so perhaps she understood.

"Well, that was anticlimactic," Miroku observed from behind them. Inuyasha sheathed Tetsusaiga and rose to his feet. Kagome did likewise, and both rejoined the group.

"It could have gone worse, Houshi-sama," Sango admonished.

"Yes, but it could have gone better as well. Ah, whoever is aiding the Shichinintai almost makes me ashamed to call myself a monk."

Inuyasha snorted. "Your lecherous behavior should’ve already done that," he commented, and both women nodded in agreement. Miroku pretended not to hear them.

"At any rate, we now know a little more about this holy man. He had a very powerful dokko…"

Inuyasha’s head abruptly snapped to the side, his back straightening. His sensitive ears had picked up something, and he strained to see if he could hear it again. Unfortunately, his friends’ conversation was making this difficult.

"Shut up, all of you!" he snapped harshly, and there probably would have been quite a nasty backlash for his rudeness if his companions hadn’t realized what he was doing. They went silent, no one even breathing for several seconds. Then he heard it, an incredibly faint sound, but alarming and unnatural.

"Do you hear it?" he asked Kirara and Shippou, but they only looked at each other in confusion. _Well, I guess we know which of us has the best ears_.

"What is it, Inuyasha?" Kagome asked.

"Explosions."

Nothing else needed to be said; within moments, they were off. The likely culprit was Ginkotsu, and aside from their obvious objective of killing him, his chosen victim was probably someone they would want to save. Obviously, the Inu-gang would assist random villagers, and Inuyasha was obligated to protect Kikyou. The hanyou wouldn’t want to rescue Kouga as much as he desired to keep the wolf’s jewel shards from falling into enemy hands. He would even try to help Sesshoumaru, if only so the little girl who tagged along with him wouldn’t perish as well.

So he didn’t mind sprinting from one battlefield to another with Kagome on his back. He was grateful for a second opportunity to finish off a member of the Shichinintai today. This time he wouldn’t let the chance slip through his grasp.

* * *

Kouga swore under his breath and changed direction in a heartbeat, narrowly avoiding yet another shell from the monstrous freak with the giant cannon on his back. All three of these bastards were walking corpses animated by the Shikon no Tama, which meant they were working for Naraku. The battlefield near where he’d found Kagome’s bag had reeked of this foul stench, as had the hut where her scent and that of the other woman had been so strong. Tracking Kagome down had been difficult, and he’d agonized over whether she was alive the entire time. Only to find that she was indeed all right, and still very much _with_ Inuyasha. Somehow, when fearing for her survival, he’d forgotten that she was promised to another. It had not been a pleasant realization.

But that was in the past. If he didn’t focus on the present, he was going to die. The situation was not good. It was one versus three, and the first shell fired from inside the barrier had damaged his legs. So he couldn’t move at full speed, which relegated him to mostly dodging the enemy’s attacks. The one time he’d rushed the metal monster, he’d gotten a faceful of fire from the bald guy riding him. And _then_ there was that big guy with the huge claws roaming about. If Kouga wasn’t careful, he would accidentally run into that creep and get sliced to pieces. If he had any faith in his pack mates, he might call for help. But alas, his allies were a bunch of weaklings who wouldn’t last five seconds in a fight like this. _If_ they actually had the balls to enter the battle in the first place.

Nearby, o’er yonder rise, two frightened ookami knelt, quivering in fear.

"Ginta…it looks like Kouga could use some help."

"Yes," Ginta replied nervously, "it certainly does."

Both males glanced behind them at the same time, but the pack wolves had already fled. Their eyes met, each seeing how badly the other wanted to do the same. But they could not. As loyal ookami, it was their solemn duty to support their pack leader.

*Gulp*

Why couldn’t Kouga have been under attack from a trio of sex-crazed she-youkai? Then the two of them might be of some use. But against these unnaturally powerful professional soldiers…

"Ginta?"

"Y-yes?"

"Please promise not to make fun of me if I accidentally soil myself."

"I may have soiled myself already, Hakkaku."

They stood, nodded to each other once, and clasped hands.

"It’s been an honor, brother."

"The honor is mine, brother."

Drawing courage from each other, they firmed their countenances and strode confidently onto the battlefield. It was time to kick some ass.

…

…

"Are we really doing this, Ginta?"

"I don’t know! Should we?"

"Maybe…maybe Kouga would be better off if we stayed hidden?"

"Y-yes! We don’t want to distract him, do we?"

"Oh, definitely not! Let’s go hide again."

"Good idea!"

They spun around to return to hiding and froze at the sound of a voice which sent shivers of terror streaking down their spines.

"Well, well, a couple wolflings came out to play, eh?"

Ginta and Hakkaku slowly turned to see the man with the massive metal claws gazing at them like a couple pieces of meat for dicing.

"You two look about ready to piss yourselves," he observed. "You gonna fight me or cry and run away?"

Ginta and Hakkaku looked at each other, once again waging an internal debate between two undesirable options: the easy way out, or death. A glorious death which might buy their leader enough time to win victory. Surely, Kouga would remember their sacrifice. If they ran, however, they would have to live with it for the rest of their days. It was enough to bolster their courage, just barely. They stood their ground, but weren’t about to rush to their doom. It was time for some good old fashioned stalling. And a pep-talk wouldn’t hurt either.

"W-w-we haven’t pissed ourselves yet!"

"Y-yeah! My loincloth is dry…and clean!"

Suikotsu grimaced, obviously afflicted with the feudal era equivalent of severe TMI. It did not help that both ookami had literally checked themselves to make sure they really were ‘dry and clean.’ But Ginta and Hakkaku weren’t done, not by a long shot.

"You don’t s-scare us, human!"

"Yeah, with your beady little crazy eyes."

"And those freaky markings on your face."

"And your spiky lunatic hair."

"And your fancy armour."

"And your big claws…"

"Holy crap, Ginta," Hakkaku whispered. "All of that really is scary!"

"I know. I may soil myself for real this time."

"Enough!" Suikotsu bellowed, causing both ookami to cower in fear. "You idiots have run your mouths for the last—what the…"

"We’re saved!" Ginta and Hakkaku cried as a familiar figure landed in front of them. They simultaneously burst into tears, hugged each other tightly and collapsed onto the ground. Sango rolled her eyes and turned her attention to Suikotsu, who did not seem disappointed by the interruption.

"Yo, taijiya. I’m glad it’s you. You’re more of a man than about fifty of those guys."

Sango’s only reply was to draw her katana.

On a different part of the battlefield, and perhaps a few seconds earlier, Kouga found himself in dire straits. His injured left leg had given out at a very inopportune moment, just as the cannon was about to fire. Now the barrel was pointed straight at him, and he knew he would be unable to rise again before the shell converted him to a smoldering crater and a bit of singed fur. Oddly, he didn’t lament his death as much as he thought he would. Perhaps it was a blessing to be killed before fully moving on from Kagome. The termination of his existence was easier to take that way.

But the Kami, or rather a certain hanyou, had other plans. Kouga suddenly found himself grabbed by the back of his armour and yanked to the side, borne away from the blast zone by powerful strides. All at once two scents assaulted his nose, one very pleasant and the other positively rotten. Kouga didn’t know whether to be grateful to his saviors or mortified.

Inuyasha didn’t give him time to think about it either. He was downright pissed; he’d had to take Kagome and his unborn child into danger to save Kouga’s sorry behind. There hadn’t been time to put her down; the only alternative had been watching the wolf get blown to smithereens. And for Kagome’s sake, he couldn’t let that happen. But he felt fully justified in blaming the wolf, and he didn’t hesitate to let him know it.

"You dumbass, Kouga! Can you ever fight a battle without almost getting yourself killed? Kirara!" he hollered, seeking the fire-cat’s attention. She flew over from dropping Sango off with Kouga’s useless lackeys and landed without prompting.

"Now get on Kirara and stay there," he told Kouga and Kagome, turning to eye the enemy warily from across the battlefield. "Don’t come down under any circumstances. I don’t really care if you get your stupid ass killed, wolf, but then Kagome will try to save you. And if she gets hurt because of you, I’ll skin you alive."

Inuyasha waited until both of them were safely in the air, along with Miroku and Shippou, before darting over to confront Ginkotsu and Renkotsu. He fingered Tetsusaiga’s hilt, but the sword was still recovering from its earlier purification. It might transform, but he doubted that any of its higher abilities would be available. So instead he left it sheathed, resolving to rely on his speed and claws instead.

"Picking on weaklings now?" he taunted. "You bastards have sunk even lower since we last fought."

"Gesh-sh-sh, Inuyasha, you won’t escape this time."

Inuyasha dodged the incoming shells and charged in, appearing to human eyes as little more than a crimson blur. Ginkotsu and Renkotsu had grown used to fighting a wounded wolf, and had not adjusted to the speed of their new target. As he raised his claws, it occurred to Inuyasha that this was the first time either of them had faced him at full strength. It would also be the last.

He decided to go for Renkotsu first, both because his jewel shard was easier to get to and because he seemed to be the ‘brains’ of the operation. He might’ve even been controlling the gun; it was hard to tell due to Inuyasha’s inexperience with machinery. In any case, he sent his claws straight for Renkotsu’s neck, the sharp points trailing fierce youki as they carved through the air. The fire-user ducked to the side at the last moment and caught the attack on his left shoulder. His eyes went wide with the pain, though the wound did not spurt blood as it would for a living human. But then, this wound was mortal for a living human, so Renkotsu was fortunate to be already dead. Not that Inuyasha intended to grant him any more time on this Earth regardless.

But Renkotsu reacted before the hanyou could follow up. A burst of fire from the mercenary’s mouth blew Inuyasha back, but he remained cognizant enough of his secondary objective to carry it out. As he soared past the twin barrels of the gun, he lashed out with his Sankon Tetsusou. The golden blades of youki sliced through the barrels at odd angles, leaving what remained of the metal cylinders scarred and twisted. Inuyasha landed a fair distance away, smirking as he shook off the last of Renkotsu’s flames. _Heh, let them try to fire that gun again. Odds are it’ll blow up in their faces._

His opponents obviously recognized this. Ginkotsu underwent some sort of mini-transformation, as what looked like a dozen or so smaller projectile weapons emerged from hidden compartments in his body. The hanyou was already on the move when the barrage began, and because he had put some additional distance between them, he found it relatively easy to dodge the array of shells and missiles sent his way. Finally he stopped, and stood facing Ginkotsu from approximately seventy-five meters away. The metal monster must surely be out of tricks now.

"Gesh-sh-sh, I will not let Renkotsu die!"

There seemed to be a brief communication between the two of them, before Renkotsu nodded and leapt off. Then Ginkotsu surged forward, his front claws tearing up the ground as he lumbered forth. Inuyasha cracked his knuckles in anticipation. If Ginkotsu wanted to sacrifice himself to buy Renkotsu time to escape, that was fine with him. The fire-user was a weakling, and could be dealt with at any time. But Ginkotsu was a formidable enemy he would make sure to finish off when he had the chance. He would tear him apart piece by piece.

Fortunately for Inuyasha, someone else interpreted this turn of events differently. For although Inuyasha’s view of Renkotsu was obscured by the approaching bulk of his comrade, Kouga’s was perfectly clear. And what he saw filled him with dread; instead of sprinting for the barrier, Renkotsu knelt on the ground and covered his head, as if he was expecting an imminent catastrophe.

Kouga acted without hesitation, vaulting down from Kirara and activating his whirlwind even before his feet touched the ground. He crossed the distance in a matter of seconds, drawing on every ounce of strength in his legs, no matter how much pain resulted. And as Inuyasha unknowingly charged to his death, the wolf prince plotted an intercept course and pulled him away even as the world went white.

The shock wave knocked him off his feet, sent him tumbling to the dirt until finally his momentum dissipated and he lay sprawled on his stomach in an awkward heap. He groaned, taking an inventory of his condition and not liking what he sensed. The exertion and subsequent explosion had torn his legs up worse than before. Even with youkai healing ability, he would be lucky if he could walk again before sundown. There was, however, a nice upside to all of this.

"Kouga-kun! Are you okay?"

Her scent soothed away some of his pain. Warm hands gently rolled him over onto his back, so he could gaze up into her beautiful, tear-filled eyes. This was new, having someone cry over him, and he decided that he could get used to it. He could almost forget that she was promised to another. But she considered him a friend, and cared enough about him to shed tears on his behalf. That would have to be enough. Absently, he wondered why he hadn’t simply let Inuyasha die. That would have solved his little ‘other male’ problem and allowed him to potentially move in on Kagome later, after she’d had a chance to grieve. So why hadn’t he chosen that course? The answer was right in front of him, he reflected. She was his friend. In that moment, he had been driven by the desire to see her happy, no matter who she chose to be with. He didn’t know when the change had occurred, but Kagome wasn’t just a potential mate to him anymore. She was a true friend.

"I’m fine, Kagome," he told her. It was a lie, but he didn’t want her to worry. Too bad she saw right through him.

"No, you’re—I’ll bandage your legs, okay?" she promised. "I’ll stay with you until you’re better."

Kouga nodded gratefully. Kagome wasn’t his woman, but he wasn’t about to turn that offer down. If nothing else, it would annoy Inuyasha, which was always a good thing as far as he was concerned.

"Thank you, Kouga-kun," she said seriously, her lower lip trembling. "You truly are a great friend."

"Bah, dry your tears. I saved his sorry ass so I wouldn’t have to see you cry."

She sniffled and managed a watery smile. "I’ll try. Are you thirsty? Is there anything else I can do for you?"

The question was innocent, but could be taken as anything but by someone so inclined. Again, the opportunity to piss Inuyasha off was too good to pass up.

"A kiss might make me feel better," he replied with a wink that the hanyou didn’t see. True to form, Inuyasha started blustering in the background. For her part, Kagome seemed relieved to see his sense of humor and actually did lean in and kiss him—on the forehead. Still, the display was enough to cause the veins to start popping on Inuyasha’s brow.

"O-oi, wench!"

"Shut up, Inu-kurro," Kouga told him, all of the playfulness in his tone suddenly gone. The hanyou had yelled at him before for being too reckless, and Kouga could admit that given his wounds he probably should have retreated. _Yeah, ‘cause Inuyasha wouldn’t have done exactly the same thing._ But that was beside the point, or at least it had been until the hanyou had nearly thrown his own life away. The simple fact was that Inuyasha had much more to lose than Kouga did.

"You’re going to be a father, you idiot!" the wolf prince snapped. "Don’t be so damn reckless all the time!"

Inuyasha seemed taken aback, but quickly recovered his form. "Is that really why you did it?" he demanded petulantly.

"Hmph. Maybe I just didn’t feel like owing you a debt. Now we’re even."

"I figured as much. Then I won’t thank you."

"You could thank me."

"I won’t!"

"Inu-kurro!"

"Smelly wolf!"

Kagome covered her face with her hands, but her smile never wavered. _Somehow my tears have already dried up._

"That battle was less anticlimactic," Miroku observed as Sango rejoined the group. The taijiya only grunted a reply, and seemed generally distracted. "Is something wrong, Sango?"

"Suikotsu…near the end of the battle, I think he realized that there was something wrong with my hand."

"Ah, I see," Miroku replied. As a warrior, Sango would naturally hate for enemies to be made aware of her vulnerabilities. Her short battle with Suikotsu today had ended in much the same manner as the previous one, with the mercenary retreating into the barrier when things went south for his comrades. Sango had come out of the exchange no worse for wear, at least physically. But evidently, Suikotsu had seen something in her fighting style. If they met him again, she would have to be extra careful.

"Don’t worry, Sango, I’m sure your hand will continue to grow stronger," he stated, originally seeking only to reassure. But then a lecherous thought occurred, which he converted into a very pleasant idea.

"You know what always used to help my hand maintain a strong grip?" he asked, just a hint of suggestiveness in his tone.

Sango sighed, feigning exasperation as she held out her hand. But though she would blush and pretend this wasn’t something she wanted, she could not banish the contentment from her eyes. So he took her hand and held it, occasionally running his fingers lightly over her palm in that special way which never failed to draw color to her cheeks, as she bit her lower lip prettily. It was a reaction he had never gotten from caressing her backside, and he delighted in it. Absently he wondered what else he had been missing due to his lecherous habits.

He didn’t know, but it would be fun finding out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I enjoyed myself writing this chapter. Ginta and Hakkaku are such lovable little scamps. Sorry if they seemed a tad on the ridiculous side, but we don’t really get to know them in canon, so I’m citing ‘artistic license’ here. 
> 
> With regards to Bankotsu’s joke early in the chapter, here are some links which provide information on the Yuki-onna, a figure in Japanese folklore. It’s funny to me that the Yuki-onna in the video really does look like she could be Kanna’s mom.   
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yuki-onna  
> https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3ReEbY5J2HM
> 
> I also wanted to say a few words about Kagome’s characterization, as some reviews have said that she is too weak. I don’t mind criticism and I don’t consider any review I’ve received so far a flame, but I thought I should explain why her character is the way it is. I base it on the anime/manga. In canon, she forgives Inuyasha for everything. She never makes him choose, and essentially enables him to two-time her. Also, in this story, she is still only fifteen years old. This isn’t late-canon, ‘has grown a backbone’ Kagome. This is early canon, ‘not quite sure of herself’ Kagome. Yes, she’s become pregnant, but she still has a lot of growing up to do. 
> 
> Ultimately, I try to portray Kagome as what she is: a fifteen-year-old girl, trying to muddle her way through her first experience with love. She’s afraid to push too hard and drive Inuyasha away, as any teenager in love would be. An older woman with romantic experience might force him to commit fully or leave him, but that’s not Kagome. And remember that Inuyasha has made a commitment to her. Not the one she wanted, but still better than what they had before. So she has reason for optimism. Youthful hopefulness is winning out over wisdom right now, as one would expect from a teenager. 
> 
> Again, I don’t want to discourage criticism. I just want to explain why Kagome’s characterization is the way it is. I’ve put a lot of thought into this, and I know this is how I want to portray her.


	18. Into Darkness

"You know what we must do, Houshi-sama."

Miroku sighed, but nevertheless nodded in agreement. Sango was right; he did know what needed to be done. That didn’t mean he had to like it.

It was early on the morning of the day after their last battle with the Shichinintai. Kagome had kept her promise to remain with Kouga until the ookami had fully healed, despite Inuyasha’s continued protests. The hanyou had been in a sour mood for the better part of the last eighteen hours, mostly because he failed to realize that Kouga’s casual flirting with Kagome was just for show, and advanced solely for the purpose of pissing him off. He had absolutely no reason to be insecure where Kagome’s affections were concerned, of course, but he was also too much of a simpleton to behave with any degree of maturity when Kouga was around. Not that the wolf prince was very mature, himself. As one of his pack mates had so eloquently put it, ‘they’re both pretty stupid.’

Thus far, the two of them had yet to come to blows. Though Miroku suspected that had less to do with Kouga’s wounds and more to do with Kagome’s lack of response to his flirting, as well as the ever-present threat of imminent ‘osuwari.’ It would be nice when the wolf departed and their relatively harmonious group dynamic was restored. Unfortunately, it appeared that this occasion would have to be put on hold.

There was only one option now. Between their group and Kouga’s, every meter of the barrier had been searched; there was no gap or opening which would allow passage to individuals with youkai blood. As a result, he and Sango were the only people capable of entering the barrier. So that is what they must do. The alternative of waiting for Naraku to drop the barrier and reveal himself was unacceptable, for the dark hanyou would only do so when he was completely ready, and more powerful than ever. Meanwhile, the Shichinintai could continue to roam about, retreating inside the barrier whenever they found themselves in peril. Again, that was unacceptable. Someone needed to enter the barrier, find the holy person maintaining it, and compel him to cease what he was doing. There was no other way to find and confront Naraku before he finished constructing his new body. And besides, as a monk Miroku felt a degree of responsibility for the fact that a fellow holy man was aiding their hated enemy. If the rogue holy man could not be reasoned with, he would not hesitate to kill him.

So his and Sango’s path was decided upon; the trick would be convincing their friends to let them go willingly. Kagome protested, as expected, but Inuyasha merely regarded them silently. He didn’t look like he was fond of the idea either, but he also knew that he had no right to stop them. Perhaps he’d already reached the same conclusion, that this was the only viable option left to them. And eventually, Kagome reluctantly accepted their decision as well. The last thing they did before departing was request that Kouga stay with the group until they returned. Inuyasha had obviously not been pleased by this, but Miroku mollified him by stating that it would be beneficial to have extra allies looking out for Kagome if the Shichinintai attacked again.

With those issues settled, Miroku and Sango departed. The goodbyes had not been tearful nor especially heartfelt, but everyone felt a certain degree of nervousness that this might be the last time they ever saw each other alive. The four remaining Shichinintai were all strong opponents, and any one of them could pose a formidable challenge. Both Miroku and Sango hoped to sneak in, eliminate the barrier, and then meet up with their friends later. But they were prepared to fight if necessary. Miroku’s primary concern was the condition of Sango’s right hand; periodically she would clench and unclench her fingers, testing her strength. Not even she knew how well it would hold up in a protracted battle, however. One thing was for certain—she would not be fighting alone. Miroku no longer had to worry about protecting Kagome or making sure he didn’t get blown to pieces by a giant piece of artillery. Therefore, he was free to assist Sango. Her skills in hand-to-hand combat were superior to his own, to be sure, but he was no liability. And surely even the taijiya would understand that the importance of their mission trumped any ‘warrior’s code’ extoling single combat.

He thought about bringing it up with her, but decided against it. No sense in making an issue out of something which hopefully would not come to pass. Besides, they were trying to keep the noise level to a minimum. They hadn’t spoken more than a few whispered words since entering the barrier, and were concentrating on keeping their footfalls quiet as they hiked up the mountain. A light fog covered this area, which obscured visibility somewhat. But this Miroku saw as a positive development since it would prevent any enemies from spotting them from a distance. And without the benefit of youkai senses, the Shichinintai might very well miss them. In theory, at least. A theory which was shot straight to hell when they emerged onto a small, flat ridge on the side of the mountain. The path continued on the other side of the open area, bordered on the right by a wall of rock and on the left by sheer cliffs. And standing right smack in the middle, blocking any further attempt to ascend the mountain, was Suikotsu.

"Well, well, look what wandered my way," the mercenary declared smugly. "It looks like it was smart for Naraku to tell oo-aniki to have this path guarded. So taijiya, do we get to finish our duel now?"

"Unless you decide to run away again," Sango replied confidently, stepping forward. She paused when she noticed Miroku walking with her stride for stride. "Stay back, Houshi-sama."

"Not this time, Sango. We’ll take him together."

"It’s too narrow," she responded immediately. Miroku took another look, and was forced to acknowledge the truth of that assessment. The ridge was only four or five meters wide at its greatest extent, and slightly narrower where Suikotsu stood. As the physically weaker of the two combatants, Sango couldn’t go toe-to-toe with her opponent. She would need to use her agility to win, and that meant having enough room to move around. Not to mention the required clearance necessary to swing hiraikotsu. In a battle like this, Miroku could admit that he might do more harm than good. But he still hated standing by while his beloved fought for her life. At least Sango seemed to understand his mental anguish.

"Please, Houshi-sama, I need someone to watch my back."

That was a valid point as well, Miroku realized. The Shichinintai were not above such dishonorable tactics as attacking an already engaged opponent from behind. They were mercenaries, through and through. But ultimately, it was not logic which convinced Miroku to nod once and step back. It was the absolute trust in Sango’s eyes. She trusted him, and she trusted her own abilities. She favored him with a small but heartfelt smile, then turned to face her opponent.

"If you lovebirds are finished," Suikotsu sneered, "maybe we can finally—hup!"

The mercenary’s comment was cut short when Sango charged in the blink of an eye, swinging hiraikotsu in a great arc with both hands. If Suikotsu had been a little slower to react, he would have been cleaved in two. But he was an expert in close quarters combat as well, and deftly leapt over the boomerang. He immediately moved in with claws raised, seeking to capitalize on Sango’s backswing, but the taijiya had anticipated this and was ready with her katana. Metal grated against metal as she parried Suikotsu’s forehand swipe with the sword, and by the time his other hand lunged in she had hiraikotsu back into position as a shield, supported by her left arm. After this initial melee, both adversaries retreated a bit and stood regarding each other seriously.

"Heh, not messing around, are we?" Suikotsu observed. "Good. I’ve been waiting for this!"

This time the mercenary charged, beginning a flurry of vicious attacks which could only be performed by someone possessing superhuman stamina. Sango was hard-pressed to meet every slash and thrust, but she managed. From his vantage point behind the taijiya, Miroku noticed something disturbing—Suikotsu seemed to be targeting her right side, trying to force her to use her katana more than she wanted to. It was clear that Sango was attempting to guard against her weakness, and her attacker was seeking to exploit it.

Finally, Suikotsu altered his attack pattern, catching Sango off guard. He sent two consecutive strikes to the taijiya’s left and managed to knock hiraikotsu slightly out of position. Then he followed up with a diagonal slash which Sango was obliged to catch with her katana. Her sword hand buckled under the pressure, and for a heartbeat Miroku feared that her grip would fail. The next blow surely would have knocked the weapon from her hand, had she not planted hiraikotsu into the ground and used it as a support to launch a devastating sidekick to her opponent’s solar plexus.

Any normal human would have had the wind severely knocked out of him, an injury which could prove fatal against an opponent such as Sango. But Suikotsu seemed to shake it off quickly, and the taijiya wasn’t confident enough in his incapacity to follow up immediately. It was probably a smart decision, since inside five seconds the mercenary had fully recovered and charged again. But Sango had already decided upon a change in tactics herself. If Suikotsu was going to target her weak hand, she would stop relying on it as half of her defense. Instead, she would fall back on her favored weapon for slaying youkai. Her opponent’s fighting abilities were certainly closer to those of a mid-level youkai than an average human.

Suikotsu was forced to skid to a halt and suck in his stomach as hiraikotsu’s edge swept past. Sango hadn’t been prepared to actually release the boomerang, which ended up saving him. Her reasoning was sound; she would be a sitting duck if such a throw didn’t kill him outright. But that still didn’t lessen her disappointment. She raised her arms and continued to twirl hiraikotsu over her head, her eyes cold steel.

Had Suikotsu been a more patient man, he might’ve waited until Sango’s arms tired before making a move. Or he could have retreated to a narrower part of the path to make it more difficult for her to use hiraikotsu offensively. But it was clear that he was enjoying himself too much to take a cautious approach. Instead he made several feints in rapid succession, testing her reaction time and aim. Finally he darted in low to the ground, then somersaulted over the boomerang as it came around. He moved in closer still and deflected the next revolution over his head with both sets of claws, then aimed an overhand swipe at Sango’s skull with his left. He probably expected her to retreat, which would have doomed her; now that he was inside the radius of her swing, he would pursue until he killed her. But the taijiya’s instincts instead drove her to step forward, into the strike as she raised her right arm to block it. In that fraction of a second, neither of the two combatants nor the lone observer could tell whether she would make it far enough to catch his wrist, or if her forearm would be torn to shreds by his claws.

The sharp sound of metal cutting flesh rang out, then the dull thud of a severed hand hitting the ground. Suikotsu stumbled back with an anguished cry, clutching the stump which now capped his right forearm. Only when he glared at Sango in hatred did he realize what had happened, and even then he had to duck and roll several meters in the opposite direction to avoid losing his head as well. Finally he lurched to his feet and regarded her with insane fury dancing in his eyes.

"A hidden arm blade, bitch?" he snarled. "I thought you were supposed to be the honorable one."

Sango snorted. "You weren’t so concerned about honor with all of those women you bragged about killing," she retorted, referring to their first encounter. "Besides, I don’t have time to waste on the likes of you!"

Sango discarded hiraikotsu and charged, tearing her katana out of its sheath and tossing it to her free left hand. Suikotsu resisted desperately, but with only one weapon he was no match for the quicker taijiya. In less than a minute she managed to inflict a deep gash in his face, which destroyed his left eye and sent him sprawling to the dirt. He knelt there holding his face with both hands, as she stood over him with her katana pointed at his neck. It was poetic justice, she reflected, that he should suffer almost the same wounds as the villager Yuu, one of his final victims.

"Any last words, Suikotsu?"

"P-p-please," came his muffled reply, which caused Sango to inhale sharply. That voice… And when he raised his head, revealing a fair face free of markings and his one remaining eye widened with panic, the taijiya froze. A sudden evil smirk was her only warning that something was amiss, and by then it was too late. Suikotsu smacked her katana aside, knocking it from her grasp. Then he lunged, putting his full strength behind a vicious swipe with his clawed right hand. Sango reacted quickly enough to take the blow on her arm blade, but the force of the impact knocked her off her feet. She sprawled to the ground on her back, and by the time she moved to rise she found the tips of Suikotsu’s claws at her throat.

"How about you, taijiya," he sneered. "Any last words?"

Sango simply glared defiantly at him, too proud to beg for her life. Not that it would do any good, anyway. Suikotsu’s face was still clear, but his eye and voice left no doubt as to which side of him was truly in control. She heard Miroku’s footsteps coming closer, but they were stopped by a sharp look from the mercenary. He seemed to be considering his options for a moment, but then he smirked, which Sango took as her death sentence. He either believed that he could take Miroku with only one hand after she was dead, or he simply didn’t care. His eye focused on her once more, and Sango prepared herself for a quick but painful descent into nothingness.

"Please!"

Both the condemned and the executioner were surprised by that outburst. Miroku’s tone had risen, to a level Sango had never heard before. When he spoke again, he seemed to have reigned in his panic, but the desperation remained.

"Please, Suikotsu-sama, spare her."

The mercenary laughed, though whether he was amused by the honorific hastily added to his name or this situation in general no one could say. But the fact that his evil grin remained in place did not bode well for Sango’s continued survival.

"How touching, houshi- _sama_ ," he mocked. "But I can’t be satisfied unless I feel my enemy’s life blood running through my fingers!"

"No!"

Sango squeezed her eyes shut, expecting burning pain to stab through her neck at any moment. Instead, she felt only the tiniest of pinpricks, and then the claws withdrew. When she dared to look up at her would-be executioner, she was astounded by what she saw. Suikotsu’s eye was wide, his pupil dilated. His teeth were gritted, grinding together audibly, and his right arm literally shook with the strain of the civil war raging within him between his dual personalities. Seeing her chance, Sango shoved his arm aside with her hand. The instant her flesh made contact with his, he seemed to snap back to himself, and stabbed forward. But due to her interference, the leading edge of a claw just barely grazed the side of her neck before all four of them thrust into the dirt. He immediately pulled them back and moved to strike her again, but by then Sango had rolled away and was scrambling to her feet. He lunged with an angry swipe, which might have caught the taijiya if Miroku’s staff had not interposed itself. The butt end of said staff then swung up and whacked him squarely on the chin, cracking his jawbone and sending him sprawling to the dirt. He lurched to his feet, clutching his head and swearing violently, now teetering dangerously on the edge of the cliff.

"Dammit! I had them! I fucking _had_ them! But that damn doctor had to interf—urk!"

He staggered, his ability to speak failing as the battle between his personalities intensified. He slowly turned and took one step toward the cliff, now leaning over the abyss. Finally, after several moments of struggle, he toppled over the edge with a final, anguished cry. Miroku and Sango scrambled over, shrinking back from the gruesome sight. Not even a shard-animated corpse could survive a fall from this height, especially with sharp rocks waiting at the bottom. The scattered remains of Suikotsu dispersed to the winds, leaving only his clothing and dark bloodstains on the rock.

Sango sighed, taking an inventory of her condition. Aside from fatigue, she seemed to be fine. The cut on the side of her neck was bleeding slowly, but would soon cease. She heard Miroku tear a strip of cloth from his robes, but didn’t have the heart to stop him as he pressed it to the wound and tied it around the other side. Not after he had begged for her life. They would probably never know whether his heartfelt pleas had saved her, or if Suikotsu’s benevolent personality would have emerged regardless. But Sango would never forget the sound of his voice, stricken as though his world was about to collapse around him.

Her stomach fluttered at the memory, but she shook it off. Now was not the time to reflect on the behavior of her wayward Houshi-sama. The path forward was now clear, and they needed to take advantage. Naraku had instructed Bankotsu to have this way guarded, so there must be something very important to the dark hanyou up ahead. And even if they were inclined to descend the cliff to recover Suikotsu’s jewel shard, a Saimyoushou would likely swoop in and claim it long before they arrived on the scene.

"Are you all right, Sango?"

"F-fine, Houshi-sama. Thank you," she replied, not completely sure what she was thanking him for.

He smiled at her, as if he understood. Then his expression turned serious once more; he too realized that there was no time for relaxation or celebration. They had entered the barrier for a very specific purpose, and had only succeeded in removing but one obstacle obstructing the path toward that goal.

The pair exchanged a nod of encouragement, then continued on their way.

* * *

Inuyasha took a deep breath and wiped the sweat from his brow. This was not going according to plan. It hadn’t been one of his better ideas, but his intentions had been good enough. Miroku and Sango had been away too long, in his estimation, so he’d decided to go in after them. He’d expected the barrier around Mount Hakurei to hinder him, but it had quickly become a crushing weight upon his shoulders. He’d reached an invisible ‘point of no return,’ where proceeding any further would be perilous even to a hanyou, and had been debating what to do when Renkotsu ambushed him. The blast from the mercenary’s shoulder-mounted cannon had forced him deeper into the barrier, resulting in the complete disappearance of his youki. He’d only managed to escape due to a convenient crack in the side of the mountain.

And now he found himself in a large cavern within Mount Hakurei. There was plenty of light to see by, courtesy of several sizable gaps in the ceiling. The big question was what to do now. Even if he could find Miroku and Sango, he wouldn’t be much help to them in this state. He’d probably slow them down, force them to worry about protecting him rather than accomplishing their mission. Ideally, he could make a stealthy retreat outside the barrier and rejoin Kagome and the others. Because the odds of him surviving if he remained here in his human form were slim to none.

At least Kagome was in good hands; he’d made sure of that before leaving her. Kouga had almost fully healed from the previous day’s battle, and Inuyasha knew he could trust the wolf to lay down his life for Kagome if need be. Would he have felt comfortable leaving her under Kouga’s protection before the wolf saved him from Ginkotsu yesterday? He didn’t know, but it certainly gave him confidence now. And he was grateful, so he tried to resist the urge to pound some lumps into Kouga’s fool head when the latter flirted with Kagome. There was still much work to be done on that front. Something about seeing another man flirting with Kagome still set him off, even though he knew that she held no romantic feelings for Kouga.

But he’d been _civil_ to the wolf, as difficult as that could be. His and Kagome’s goodbye had been short but heartfelt. She’d hugged him tightly, and with a few tears in her eyes had made him promise to be careful. He’d reciprocated the embrace, allowing himself a moment to indulge in her scent, her intoxicating warmth. He’d noticed Kouga watching them with a gloomy expression, and hadn’t made any comment other than telling him to protect Kagome well or consequences would follow. Not in such eloquent words, of course. But most importantly, he hadn’t rubbed the wolf’s nose in her obvious affection for him, not even a little. Even though part of him, the part which bitterly held onto past slights, desperately wanted to.

But he was no longer a bitter person, and he knew Kagome appreciated it. Now, the trick would be figuring out how to get back to her in one piece. He turned to look in the direction which might serve him best for that purpose, and leapt back out of reflex as a steel blade tore a hole in the floor of the cave half a meter from where he’d just stood. He felt no relief at having dodged the attack, since it had likely been designed simply to get his attention. He had never known Jakotsu to miss, at least when there was enough light to see by. Inuyasha suddenly found himself fervently wishing for darkness, but alas, there was plenty of daylight left. Enough for Jakotsu to slaughter him dozens of times over.

"Heh, it’s just as Renkotsu-no-aniki said," the mercenary declared gleefully, eyes alight with pleasure. "You really are Inuyasha! Your human form is adorable too, I have to say."

Inuyasha gripped Tetsusaiga’s hilt tightly with his right hand, for all the good it would do him. He tried to mentally prepare himself for the reality that he would likely never see Kagome again, or hear his child cry, or watch him grow up. And in doing so, he discovered the resolve he needed to fight for survival, tooth and nail. He would last as long as he could and pray for a miracle.

Jakotsu licked his lips, eyeing Inuyasha hungrily in a way which sent a shiver down the hanyou’s spine. "I’ve waited so long…for the time when I get to have you."

Inuyasha growled defiantly, the sound not so formidable in his human form. Whatever the perverted mercenary had planned for him, he vowed that he would not go down without a fight. This seemingly easy prey would prove most fierce.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Sorry this was such a short chapter, but I really wanted to end it there. And again, I don’t want to spend much time retelling events which take place the same way they did in canon (like Inuyasha’s entry into the barrier, for example). The next chapter should be much longer.


	19. Battlefield: Mount Hakurei

Inuyasha swore under his breath. Or tried to. In reality, it only came out as a choked gasp, courtesy of his overtaxed lungs. His heart beat rapidly, struggling to pump blood through a body which was steadily bleeding from dozens of sharp wounds. He had lost too much already; his vision was blurring and his limbs were no longer following his brain’s commands. And as he gazed up into Jakotsu’s malevolent visage with as much defiance as he could muster, Inuyasha fervently wished for unconsciousness to swallow him up. As if reading his thoughts, the mercenary smirked.

"Don’t worry, Inuyasha. I won’t let you pass out on me. I want to hear you cry, after all."

Absently, Inuyasha wondered what he was supposed to cry for. Mercy? A quick death? Probably both, he assumed, just so Jakotsu could have the pleasure of denying each in turn. Because there was no way the mercenary was going to cut this encounter short of his own volition; he was clearly enjoying himself too much for that. But Inuyasha still could not say for certain what was about to happen to him. Sometimes it was clear to him that Jakotsu wanted to slice him up with agonizing slowness, a torturous demise similar to the ‘death by a thousand cuts’ he’d heard rumors of from the mainland. Other times, like a few moments ago when the mercenary had promised to ‘take my time caressing you,’ Inuyasha was forced to imagine that his tormenter might have something more sinister in mind.

But no matter what depraved ideas were swimming around in Jakotsu’s head, Inuyasha knew that his remaining time on this earth was going to be a living hell. Which is why, in a moment of weakness, he’d silently begged for blissful unconsciousness to put an end to it all. Before he remembered what he would lose if he died today. Inuyasha was not delusional. He knew that the chances of him walking out of this cave alive were slim to none. But there was a chance. It was more prayer than hope, but it was all he had to cling to. He had promised himself that he would fight until the very end, and he would damn well do it. If only so he could look Kagome and his unborn child in the eyes when he met them in the afterlife.

Logically, anything he did at this point would be futile. He hadn’t managed to even scratch Jakotsu when dueling with him, sword to sword. Tetsusaiga could stand up to Jakotsutou even in its dull form, but his human arms could not. He lacked the strength and reflexes to handle the initial strike and all of the subsequent iterations when the enemy’s blade would fold over itself and slice him from unexpected angles. Hence the wounds riddling his skin and the not inconsequential amount of his blood seeping into the floor of the cave. His best opportunity had come when Jakotsu let his guard down, believing him to be on the verge of collapsing. He’d suddenly swung Tetsusaiga, aiming for the jewel shard in the mercenary’s neck. But he’d been too slow, his body too heavy and his vision too blurred from blood loss, so he’d missed. And now he found himself struggling to muster the strength to resist, held upright only by his assailant’s grip on his hair.

"Now there’s the agonized face I’ve been looking for!" Jakotsu declared, grinning cruelly. "But you still haven’t shown me true despair. I won’t be satisfied until I’ve seen it." He pulled Inuyasha up further, so the hanyou was essentially kneeling upright before him, still supported by a lock of hair. Then he leaned down and placed his lips right next to his victim’s human ear.

"So what do you say, Inuyasha?" he whispered. "Shall I be gentle?"

Inuyasha cringed in disgust, as his whole body shuddered at the revolting sensation of Jakotsu’s tongue running over his ear. Then the mercenary took the upper half of the fleshy lobe into his mouth, sucking tenderly as if enjoying a lover’s kiss. Inuyasha’s relief when the unsettling contact finally ended was short-lived, however.

"Or rough?"

Those two words, delivered in a positively sadistic tone, were his only warning before his ear suddenly exploded in pain. He cried out weakly, and was sure that Jakotsu had bitten part of his earlobe clean off. In reality, the mercenary had ‘merely’ inflicted a deep puncture wound with one of his canine teeth. He pulled back, moaning softly to himself as he savored the heady taste of his victim’s blood.

Inuyasha gritted his teeth and fought back his rising panic. At least now he knew exactly what Jakotsu intended for him. Still, his ultimate goal remained the same. He had to get out of this cave alive, and the only way to do that was to remove the jewel shard from his enemy’s neck. The bastard was just mocking him with this ‘be gentle’ crap. Even if he did beg Jakotsu to ‘embrace me gently,’ as the mercenary himself had suggested, Jakotsu was still going to carve him up into tiny pieces afterward. He would expire in a pool of his own blood, all the same. So no, he wasn’t about to voluntarily give himself to Jakotsu. He did, however, need to find a way to get the mercenary to lower his guard, which would be difficult because of his previous failed attempt to remove the jewel shard. The most obvious way to do this was to feign surrender, to give Jakotsu a taste of the ‘true despair’ he was after. So Inuyasha schooled his features, banished the defiance from his eyes, and tried to reflect the very real fear which gripped him.

Jakotsu seemed pleased, if not entirely convinced, but he did release his hold on Inuyasha’s hair. Then hanyou collapsed onto his back, grateful for the wall of the cave which supported him in a somewhat upright position. The few moments of relative inactivity had rejuvenated him slightly, or perhaps it was just a sudden burst of adrenaline. Either way, some of the strength had returned to his hands and arms, enough perhaps for one more desperate attempt. And none too soon. For in the next moment, Jakotsu had squatted before him, took a fistful of hair at the base of his neck, and slammed their lips together in a brutal kiss.

Inuyasha’s first instinct was to bite off the tongue which he suddenly found invading his mouth. His second was to grab hold of the hardness rubbing against his leg and snap it like a twig. But fortunately, he was in enough control of his emotions to resist those urges, just barely. For either action would only result in Jakotsu becoming angry, which would likely hasten his own demise considerably. Instead, his right hand, which was still clenched around Tetsusaiga’s hilt, shifted the sword experimentally. He was thrilled to discover that the blade was now free; Jakotsu had deliberately stepped on it a few moments ago, but in his excitement the fool had completely forgotten about Tetsusaiga. It was a mistake which would cost him dearly.

Jakotsu stumbled back, clutching his neck with both hands. With wide, panicked eyes he watched his shard of the Shikon no Tama flutter through the air and bounce off the cave floor. Inuyasha smiled grimly, knowing he would genuinely enjoy the sight of this bastard dissolving to dust.

But nothing happened.

Jakotsu laughed, in relief at first, but then quickly shifting to malice. He stood, picked up the fallen jewel shard, and inserted it into his neck once more.

"Too bad, Inuyasha. I forgot that I had another jewel shard on me. I’ll have to thank Oo-aniki again the next time I see him."

Inuyasha’s spirits sank; he imagined his expression right now was very close to ‘true despair.’ His efforts had been futile all along. Without knowing where the other jewel shard was located, he had exactly zero chance of killing Jakotsu. Now the mercenary eyed him hungrily, like a cat prepared to toy with a helpless mouse.

"You’re one of the strongest guys I’ve ever met, I’ll give you that," the mercenary declared with a certain degree of admiration. "But they all break in the end. Sooner or later you’ll beg me to put an end to it, and if I’m feeling merciful, I’ll slit your throat. But since you’ve already tried to kill me twice, don’t count on it."

Inuyasha thought of Kagome and Sango, how terrified they must have been, and what could have happened if Mukotsu had possessed a hidden jewel shard as well. Thinking of Kagome gave him an odd sense of peace. At least it was him who was condemned to suffer and die, instead of her. He only prayed that she would survive, leave this place and raise their child in safety, even if it meant returning to her world and never coming back through the well. She had already done more for him than she would ever know. She didn’t need to avenge his death; taking care of their child was the final thing he would request of her.

"Hm?"

Jakotsu’s confused utterance surprised Inuyasha, but he lacked the energy to raise his head to find out what was amiss. Then he felt it—a surge of power, like the first ray of dawn after a moonless night. The metamorphosis washed over him quickly, an invigorating tidal wave of energy which carried him to his feet and transformed Tetsusaiga into its true form. A vicious growl reverberated in his throat as the scent of his assailant’s arousal put him in an even fouler mood than he already was. But at least he was himself, his _whole_ self, again. _Heh, Miroku, Sango…I came in here to save you, but you ended up saving me instead. Somehow, you broke the fucking barrier!_ He might never tell anyone exactly what the houshi and taijiya had rescued him from, but he would make sure they knew how grateful he was nonetheless.

"Oooh, your hanyou powers have returned, eh?"

Inuyasha glared at Jakotsu, who seemed far too amused by this turn of events, when by rights he should be trembling in fear. The hanyou did notice what had surprised the mercenary—a swarm of youkai flying from the interior of the cave toward the various exits in the rock. The sacred barrier enclosing Mount Hakurei must have trapped them deep inside the mountain, and when it went down the youkai were free to make their escape.

"You’re an idiot, Jakotsu," Inuyasha retorted. "That you didn’t finish me off quickly will prove fatal to you."

"Well, I couldn’t help it. Unless I take my time, I don’t get any stimulation," he replied, smiling licentiously. "Besides, there’s plenty of time left. I still intend to hear you cry!"

The snake-like blade lanced out, in a strike far faster and more formidable than any he had sent at Inuyasha’s human form. Probably because he knew that if he wanted to have the hanyou at his mercy now, he would have to inflict a truly serious injury. But there was one thing different about this battle and both of their prior encounters. Previously, Inuyasha had always started a significant distance away from Jakotsu, and had been forced to attempt the unenviable task of closing said distance against a long and unpredictable sword. Now, however, courtesy of the sudden reversal of fortune, the two adversaries were already very close together, separated by no more than a few meters. It was an opportunity which Inuyasha could not miss. Before Jakotsutou had a chance to fully unfold, he leapt forward and smashed it aside with Tetsusaiga. The snake-like blade crashed into the cave wall and stuck there, leaving its wielder completely exposed.

Part of Inuyasha wanted very much to cast Tetsusaiga aside and tear Jakotsu apart with his bare hands. Piece by bloody piece, seeing if he could make _him_ cry and beg for mercy. And maybe emasculate him for good measure. But even with what the mercenary had tried to do to him, the thought of reveling in such wanton slaughter proved revolting, though still tempting. He would dishonor himself, prove that he was the monster the majority of the world imagined him to be. Most importantly, he would dishonor the woman who claimed to love him and carried his child.

Within moments, it was all over. The Kaze no Kizu had torn into Jakotsu’s body and buried him under a mound of rubble. Inuyasha took a step forward, intent on making sure the mercenary was really dead, but froze as a faint but pervasive scent invaded his nostrils. _Naraku!_ It was coming from the interior of the cave, where the random lower-level youkai had emerged. Forgetting all about Jakotsu and the jewel shards he carried, Inuyasha sprinted off in pursuit of the dark hanyou.

* * *

Kagome glanced anxiously at Mount Hakurei, for at least the fiftieth time in the past fifteen minutes. Had it really only been that long since Inuyasha’s departure? Logically, it would likely take him longer than that to return from his mission even if everything went according to plan. But she couldn’t shake the foreboding feeling that both of them had missed something, failed to comprehend a critical piece of information which would have made all the difference in the world. She resumed her pacing, hoping that eventually her brain would enlighten her as to the reason behind her vague fear. Then the world started to spin.

"Whoa," she muttered, stumbling a bit as she rested her hand against her temple. Kouga was by her side in an instant, helping her to a sitting position on the ground.

"Are you all right, Kagome?" he demanded, clearly worried. The miko took a moment to gather herself, breathing deeply until her sudden dizziness subsided.

"I’m fine, Kouga-kun. The pregnancy book said it’s normal to get lightheaded, especially when stressed."

Kouga, who had absolutely zero experience with pregnant humans, had no reason to doubt her words. He nevertheless grabbed a bottle of water and pressed it into her hands, just in case dehydration was part of the problem as well. Kagome thanked him for the trouble and downed about a quarter of it. But she knew she wasn’t dehydrated; this probably was just a case of a little too much stress on a pregnant body. To paraphrase one of the book’s consistent themes, ‘Your body is working hard through this entire nine-month process. Rest when it tells you to rest.’ She sighed, knowing that she could never stop worrying about Inuyasha, but also realizing that she needed to listen to the nameless author’s advice.

"Feeling better?"

Kagome turned to meet Kouga’s concerned gaze with a sincere smile. "Much better, thanks."

He nodded, clearly relieved. He drew away from her then, just slightly, so his arm was no longer draped around her shoulders as he sat next to her. Now that her dizzy spell was over, he would go back to limiting their physical contact in order to respect her choice. Kagome drew her legs up and leaned her cheek against her knees, gazing over at him thoughtfully.

"You’ve handled this so well, Kouga-kun. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it."

The wolf prince snorted, suddenly unable to meet her gaze. He looked like he wanted to get something off his chest.

"Not that well," he admitted. "I’ve…wished for his death, at times. Since finding out you were carrying his child."

Kagome digested that information silently. It was obviously something he felt guilty over, and from his expression it appeared that he expected her to be angry or hurt. Ultimately, she was neither; she knew what unrequited love felt like.

"It’s all right, Kouga-kun." When he only stared at her in shock, she shook her head and smiled sadly. "You see, I’ve wished for Kikyou’s death at times, too. I always regret it afterwards, thinking what a horrible person I am. But it’s only natural, when you love someone… But you actually had Inuyasha’s life in your hands, and you chose to save him. I like to believe that if I ever have Kikyou’s life in my hands, I’ll do the same. But I can never really know until it happens. I actually envy you, in a way. You’ve been tempted and you overcame it, because you wanted me to be happy. I hope I can be as strong as you, if I ever face the same temptation."

"You’re strong, Kagome. Stronger than you know. Now…who’s Kikyou?"

She blinked in confusion, suddenly feeling quite foolish. _Oh, right. We never told Kouga-kun about Kikyou, did we?_ If not for this conversation, they probably never would have done so. But she couldn’t brush off his question now, not after she’d confessed to desiring the death of this mystery person. There’s no way he would let it go after hearing that. So she relayed the abridged version of the story of Inuyasha and Kikyou, providing just enough detail so Kouga would know who the dead miko was and why she’d occasionally wished for her death.

The wolf fingered his chin and made a sound of self-enlightenment, as if pieces of a puzzle were falling into place for him. The day he’d found out that Kagome was pregnant, he’d later recalled how shocked Inuyasha had appeared at her declaration that she saw the hanyou in a romantic light. It was part of the reason he’d decided to seek her out, and then at the temple she’d confirmed that Inuyasha didn’t yet know that she was in love with him. So now he felt he had a fairly good grasp of the situation. He didn’t know exactly how Kagome had come to be carrying the hanyou’s child, but it wasn’t after mutual declarations of love. Something had still been holding Inuyasha back from openly reciprocating Kagome’s obvious feelings for him—obvious to the rest of the world, anyway. _Heh, I thought he was just an idiot, but this actually explains a lot…he’s still a giant idiot, of course._

"Kouga-kun," Kagome hedged, sounding somewhat nervous. "Please promise me that you won’t hassle Inuyasha about this."

"It’s not my business," he answered simply. "But Kagome, you deserve his heart. If he won’t give it to you, the whole damn thing, then…don’t settle."

With that, Kouga rose to his feet and stalked off to rejoin his pack mates. A cold wind blew through, causing Kagome to shiver. She suddenly felt very alone. She recalled Inuyasha’s last encounter with Kikyou, and how the hanyou had betrayed her trust. The dead miko would always have a place in his heart, but that wasn’t what Kouga meant. If Kikyou owned a spot in Inuyasha’s heart beyond what was customarily reserved for a past love, then that was too much in the wolf prince’s eyes. It wasn’t giving her, Kagome, his whole heart. She didn’t even need to wonder if she enjoyed such a thing now; the answer was painfully obvious. Kouga’s words rang in her head. _Don’t settle…don’t settle…but when do I make that decision? And how?_

Kagome was not surprised when the answers to those questions eluded her. She would likely never know exactly when she would reach her breaking point with Inuyasha, until she reached it. Or if she would ever reach it at all. She had shown a remarkable capacity to forgive when it came to her hanyou love interest, in her own opinion. Who knew if she would one day become frustrated enough to put her foot down and force him to make a decision, or if she would continue to ‘settle,’ as Kouga feared. Part of the problem was that for much of the time, it didn’t feel like settling. Her current relationship with Inuyasha made her ridiculously happy sometimes. But at moments like this, she was reminded that there _was_ something missing, something she desperately longed for. How long could she content herself with hopes for the future, when that future seemed so hopelessly uncertain?

She gasped as the ground shook beneath her, a paradigm shift taking place in the world around her. Almost in a single instant, the overwhelming purity of Mount Hakurei vanished, to be replaced by a terrible youkai aura. It brushed against her subconscious, as unsettling as it had always been. Naraku. Somehow, her friends had brought down the barrier! Kirara sensed this as well; she leapt down from Kagome’s arms and transformed, then glanced at the miko expectantly. Shippou was also feeling better, and Kouga was of course raring to go. In short order, the four of them were off, Kagome and Shippou riding on Kirara and Kouga running ahead of them, at a speed which quickly left his pack mates far behind. But Kagome was not about to ask him to slow down; she too felt a certain sense of urgency. Something big was about to happen, and she would do everything in her power to be there when it did. She could do no less, since her friends had already risked their lives by going inside the barrier. If they were still alive, she would find them.

"Kagome!" Kouga called to her over the wind whipping past. "Do you sense any jewel shards?"

She focused on the mountain, immediately noticing a large concentration of the Shikon no Tama’s energy about halfway to the top, and seemingly deep within the rock. She drew in a breath to shout an answer to Kouga, but froze as a much smaller signature registered on the very edge of her awareness. She had been focusing on the mountain, but now that she shifted her gaze, she noticed that this new signal was coming from behind a rocky outcropping just ahead of them. It was probably only one or two shards, but this was dangerous; Kouga was about to pass the outcropping. Her view of him had been obscured by light smoke for a few seconds now, which the person waiting in ambush had probably used to mask his scent. With dread, she realized who they were likely running into.

"Look out, Kou—"

Her warning turned into a terrified shriek as Kouga was enveloped in a fiery explosion. He careened out of the expanding cloud of dust and smoke a moment later, impacting the ground with his head and shoulder and rolling into an awkward heap, where he lay unmoving.

"Kouga-kun!"

Heedless of the danger, Kagome directed Kirara to land next to the wolf prince. He was breathing steadily, and appeared to be simply unconscious. The blast had torn him up pretty badly, but his youkai blood would heal him. He did not stir when she nudged him, but that wasn’t all that surprising. Between the shock wave and the fall, his brain had endured enough trauma to kill a human outright. Even a full-youkai would need time to recover from that.

"Heh, is he out cold or dead?"

Kagome spun towards the voice, to see Renkotsu emerging from the smoke twenty meters away. Kirara growled low in her throat, and Kagome nocked an arrow as she moved forward a few paces to place herself protectively in front of her fallen friend. Renkotsu grinned in amusement, clearly not impressed. He had probably already reloaded the shoulder-mounted cannon which had wounded Kouga. And Kagome was displeased to discover that he now possessed two shards of the Shikon no Tama, one in his neck and the other in his left shoulder. _Probably Ginkotsu’s shard,_ she reflected; it had never been found after the last battle, and had likely been flung back inside the barrier by the tank-man’s self-destruction. An unfortunate break for her, as it turned out. For she would now need two perfectly-placed arrows in order to kill Renkotsu, instead of just one. The obvious degree of difficulty aside, she could not even be certain that the mercenary would allow her to get off two shots. It seemed impossible, but she resolved not to give up. Kouga’s life hung in the balance.

Buoyed by that thought, she smoothly drew back her bow and fired, hoping to catch her enemy by surprise. But Renkotsu was ready, sidestepping the projectile while keeping the cannon aimed squarely at the ground under her feet. Kagome saw the flash from the barrel, but with her decidedly human reflexes, she could do nothing but close her eyes and wait for death.

Her feet were suddenly lifted off the ground, just before the sound of the detonation set her ears to ringing. She was momentarily shocked to find herself in one piece, until she heard Kirara’s cry of pain. The fire-cat had carried her off by the back of her sailor fuku, shielding her from the effects of the explosion with her own body. She managed to set Kagome on her feet before reverting to her kitten form and writhing on the ground in agony. The miko’s first reaction was to pick the feline up, but she quickly reconsidered. She was still Renkotsu’s main target; the farther away she was from her friends, the better. So she took off at a run, choosing a course which would take her at an angle away from her attacker.

Renkotsu led her with his next shot, but she anticipated this and changed direction just before he fired. Her own projectile whizzed past his left side, much closer to its intended target this time. She wasn’t exactly the embodiment of grace in motion, but she was young and fairly athletic from months of chasing—and being chased by—youkai in the feudal era. Still, this wasn’t a fair fight. Her little bow and arrow could hardly compare to Renkotsu’s cannon, since the mercenary wasn’t a youkai and couldn’t be purified. He could reload his weapon nearly as fast as she could reload hers, and he seemed to have a large supply of ammunition in the pack strapped to his back. No, things were not looking up for our miko. She had to remain in a constant state of unpredictable motion to dodge the explosive shells, while Renkotsu could remain fairly stationary and dodge her arrows with relative ease. But she dared not close the distance between them, lest her human reflexes fail her.

The two combatants exchanged several volleys. After a particularly close call, Kagome frantically rubbed the dust from her eyes as she stumbled away. She was covered in dirt, breathing heavily and already feeling fatigue in her tired legs. Still she drew an arrow and fired, this one grazing Renkotsu’s chest armour as he twisted to the side. His evasive maneuver gave her a chance to catch her breath, as the Shichinintai member glared at her, showing the first sign of genuine annoyance. She didn’t know if it would be a good thing or a bad thing if he finally started to take her seriously. He was reaching for another shell when his entire back suddenly erupted in blue flame.

Renkotsu’s face reflected confusion for a moment. But though these strange flames were not burning him, he correctly deduced that they could still _act_ as fire, in other ways. With potentially disastrous consequences. Swearing aloud, he dropped the cannon and flung the ammunition pack away, just before it exploded spectacularly. Fortunately, the brave kitsune who had caused this turn of events was nowhere near the blast. He had already scurried away, out of reach of the angry mercenary who looked as though he wanted to make roast fox out of him.

Kagome hated that Shippou had put himself in danger, but greatly appreciated the assistance nonetheless. This changed everything. Now she held the advantage, since Renkotsu’s ability to strike from a distance was gone. In order for him to harm her now, he would have to run a gauntlet of arrows; she would be able to get at least a handful of them off before he was upon her. The only question was whether she would rise to the challenge and hit the target, or choke at the crucial moment. She could not afford to fail again, as she had in Mukotsu’s hut. Sango was not here to back her up this time.

Renkotsu glowered, staring her down. Not once did he appear to consider running away. Kagome could admire such determination, in other circumstances. She met his gaze unflinchingly, equally determined. The mercenary nodded once, indicating that at the very least, she had earned his respect.

He took off in a sprint the same instant that Kagome drew her arrow. The first projectile missed, thrown off by his intentionally zig-zagging course. The next was closer, but likewise sailed wide. Kagome took a slightly deeper breath before the third, allowing him to close the distance a little more. Then she correctly anticipated his move and buried a shaft in his left shoulder, just below the jewel shard. Renkotsu staggered and nearly went down, but managed to maintain his footing and dodge her fourth arrow.

Kagome started to enjoy a real surge of confidence, but Renkotsu was not out of tricks yet. He drew what looked like a primitive stick of dynamite from his robes, lit it, reared back and hurled it at the miko. Or so she thought. She watched in stunned fascination as the projectile missed her by a good ten or fifteen meters, wondering how his aim could possibly be that bad. Until she noticed the small furry lump lying on the ground less than a meter from where the dynamite had come to rest. _Oh, no_. Kirara would never survive an explosion from that distance, and she didn’t appear able to move on her own.

As Kagome sprinted toward her feline friend, she realized that she was playing right into Renkotsu’s hands. The mercenary had been aiming for Kirara the entire time, for the simple reason that it would take her longer to rescue the fire-cat than it would to dodge the dynamite herself. But the alternative of letting Kirara die was unacceptable. And since she didn’t know where Shippou was, she couldn’t rely on the kit to do the job. He could be hiding on the other side of the battlefield, for all she knew, unable to make it in time.

The fuse was nearly exhausted by the time she arrived, and there was simply no time to pick up the dynamite and throw it away. So, summoning all of her limited soccer skills, she booted the stick as hard as she could. She hit it squarely with the side of her foot, propelling it rapidly through the air. Souta would be proud. He would not be so impressed with the way she, in attempting to shield her eyes from the ensuing blast, stumbled and fell flat on her backside. But then, how clumsy she appeared was the least of her concerns at the moment.

Renkotsu was bearing down on her, with only a handful of running steps before he was upon her. Yet, in the heat of the moment, Kagome’s nerves remained cool and collected. From her prone position, she drew an arrow and fired. The shot took Renkotsu in the neck, passing halfway through before friction finally killed its momentum. At any rate, the light of the Shikon no Tama no longer shone from his flesh; she had driven the shard out the back of his neck. Renkotsu snarled in pain, but kept coming. Kagome reached for another arrow, but there simply wasn’t time. Her attacker raised a fist, which reflected in the miko’s widened eyes as it hurtled towards her. Behind it was an unnaturally powerful body strengthened by a Shikon fragment. If this blow did not kill her outright, it would surely crack her skull. Either way, she was dead.

Salvation came, once again, in a small but rapidly expanding package. The giant pink balloon pushed her to the ground, before being violently smashed away by Renkotsu’s fist. The pitiful sound Shippou made as he was struck sent a flash of sorrow through Kagome, but also fury. Renkotsu loomed over her now, raising his fist for what would finally be the killing blow. But as she gazed up at him, she noticed something which she hadn’t before: her arrow still protruded from his left shoulder. Rising to her knees, she lunged, gripping the shaft with both hands and shoving it deeper. Renkotsu’s body spun away from her as he swung his fist, and Kagome twisted the arrow hard, even as she slammed her eyes shut in preparation for the impact.

It never came. She felt a shower of dust against her cheek, but nothing more. She opened her eyes in time to watch Renkotsu’s shocked and dismayed face dissolve and disperse to the winds.

She collapsed onto her hands and knees, breathing rapidly as she fought against the adrenaline which had kept her alive to this point. Joy and relief manifested themselves in the form of uncontrollable nervous laughter, and her hands refused to stop shaking. But even if she was temporarily reduced to a nervous wreck, at least she was alive. Thanks in large part to those who had given so much in order to help her.

Once she had composed herself, she stood and collected the two jewel shards lying on the ground, then immediately headed over to Shippou. He groaned when she picked him up, gazing up at her with pained and tearful eyes. Kagome sobbed once, but resolved to hold herself together for his sake. In all honestly, he had merely suffered a severe bruise on his chest and perhaps a few cracked ribs, as she discovered when she gingerly pulled open his robes. Shippou had also been struck during the battle against the creature they later identified as Kyoukotsu. But that had been an open-hand slap of annoyance, as opposed to a piercing blow designed to pulverize the flesh and bones of a human. Shippou had undoubtedly saved her life, and she was incredibly thankful that his wounds were not worse than they actually were. Still, to see him suffer tore at her heart.

"Shippou-chan…my little hero," she cooed, rewarded when the kit managed a drowsy smile. He closed his eyes and quickly drifted off to sleep, which was probably the best thing for him. Inuyasha healed faster when he was resting, and she was sure it would be no different for a kitsune.

She gave Kirara similar treatment, though the fire-cat was not injured as badly as Shippou. On the other hand, she needed to be fairly close to full strength to transform, and it would be some time before she recovered enough for that. She likewise seemed more than content to doze in Kagome’s arms. All in all, the member of the group who might have been in the best shape, aside from herself, was Kouga. The wolf prince blinked blearily at her as she approached, sitting up slowly so as not to reopen his wounds, most of which were already closing. He rubbed his head, unwittingly confirming her earlier hypothesis that he’d been suffering from the youkai version of a bad concussion. Ah, the wonders of youkai blood. Instead of winding up dead or in a coma, one simply took a power nap. Kagome smiled at him, and was just about to ask how he was feeling when his eyes widened in panic. Before she could turn around to find out what frightened him so, a strong male arm wrapped around her waist, and the cool metal of a sword blade pressed against her neck. She didn’t need to go cross-eyed to see that it was Bankotsu’s massive halberd which literally had her life balanced on the edge of its blade.

Kagome cursed her inattentiveness; she had been so worried about her friends, that she hadn’t noticed the approach of Bankotsu’s jewel shards. And though she didn’t have eyes in the back of her head, it certainly felt like he still possessed three in his neck. In fact, there was also one in his right forearm, which rested against her shoulder as he held Banryuu in that deadly grip. _He probably used a shard to heal the wound caused by my arrow._ Gulping nervously, she hoped her captor didn’t decide to hold that little incident against her. There had to be some reason he hadn’t slit her throat yet, right?

"Very impressive, I must say," the mercenary declared sincerely, not in the least bit condescending. "For a while there I thought he was going to get you, but you pulled it out in the end."

"Let her go, you bastard," Kouga growled, rising to his feet and clenching his fists. His body was somewhat beaten up, but he appeared entirely ready to charge in fists flying.

"Relax, wolf. I don’t really care if this girl lives or dies. Ultimately, it’s up to you. But first, girl, why don’t you hand over Renkotsu’s shards?"

Kagome didn’t see much choice but to obey, so she held up her palm and allowed Bankotsu to claim them. His aura pulsed menacingly as he inserted them into his body.

"Now it’s your turn, wolf," he told Kouga. "Hand over the shards in your legs, and I’ll let her go."

Kouga hesitated, glaring at his enemy, clearly trying to decide whether Bankotsu was telling the truth. But despite his casual demeanor, the mercenary did not give the wolf prince more than a couple seconds to consider.

"Time’s up, wolf. I probably could have simply killed you and taken your shards, but you look like you could run around for a while with them in your legs. And I’m in somewhat of a hurry, you see. I know you don’t trust me, but I can promise you that if you don’t give me your shards by the time I count to three, I _will_ slit this girl’s throat. One…"

To punctuate his words, he pressed Banryuu against Kagome’s flesh, drawing a thin line of blood and a gasp from her. Kouga didn’t need to hear or see anything else. He immediately bent down and removed the shards from his legs, tossing them over without delay.

"There’s a good pup," Bankotsu mocked, as he inserted two more shards into his body. To his credit, Kouga only fumed silently. That is until the mercenary finally pulled Banryuu from Kagome’s neck and stepped back. The wolf prince charged in the blink of an eye, though his speed was nowhere near his previous record when healthy and boosted by the Shikon fragments. As a result, Kagome was able to react quickly enough to intercept Kouga as he attempted to race past her, and sent him careening back with a blast of miko energy. She rushed over to check on him and then turned to regard Bankotsu fiercely, an arrow leveled at his neck. The mercenary grinned at her and drew himself out of his fighting stance, leaning Banryuu casually over his shoulder once more.

"Clever girl," he said. "That would have been very stupid of him."

Kagome did not doubt the truth of those words; if she hadn’t stopped Kouga, he would be dead right now. Bankotsu backed away, apparently concerned enough about her archery skills to refrain from turning his back on her until he was at a safe distance. Seeing this, Kagome hastily she blurted out a question which had been on her mind ever since he first appeared.

"Why didn’t you help Renkotsu?"

Bankotsu paused only briefly, still facing away from her. "In response, I’ll ask you two questions. How many jewel shards did Renkotsu have? And what do you think he would have done with Kouga’s shards?"

Then he was gone, jogging off at a quick pace until he vanished from view. Kagome watched him go, then turned to her wounded friend. He groaned, and she blinked back sympathetic tears. She had not shocked him quite as hard as when he’d attacked Inuyasha, but close enough. And with his body already beaten up, it couldn’t have felt very good. But it was a necessary evil, and she hoped he understood that. Nevertheless, she certainly had something else to apologize for.

"I’m sorry, Kouga-kun."

"It’s okay," he muttered. "He probably would’ve killed me."

"No—I mean, yes, I am sorry for that, but…you wouldn’t have been hurt in the first place if I had sensed Renkotsu sooner."

"That’s my fault too. I smelled the smoke he used to conceal his scent, but didn’t think anything of it. Your warning though…it saved me. Otherwise, I probably would’ve lost my legs."

Kagome was glad to hear this, and equally happy that he didn’t hold anything against her. She hugged him as tightly as she dared, then placed Shippou and Kirara in his lap.

"Will you watch over them for me?"

"Where the hell are you going?!" he demanded, suddenly alarmed. Kagome stood, gathering her bow and quiver, and checking her depleted supply of arrows.

"Kagome!"

"I’m going into Mount Hakurei," she answered calmly.

"The hell you—" he began to protest, until she silenced him with an impressive surge of miko energy. Then he could only stare at her in shock, mesmerized by the intensity of her gaze, the strength and conviction in her eyes. Why did she suddenly feel so self-assured? Perhaps it was merely the aftermath of surviving a harrowing battle. Or maybe it was because, regardless of the shortcomings of her fighting skills and the help she had needed to come through alive, she hadn’t failed in the crucial moment. She hadn’t choked.

"Kouga-kun, I have to go. Inuyasha is there. Miroku-sama and Sango-chan are there. They might need me. I’m the only one who’s come close to purifying Naraku. He’s made me a target more times than I can remember. He’s _afraid_ of me. I’m going to remind him why."

Kouga nodded his assent, though he clearly didn’t like it. But how could he argue with her, after seeing how determined she was? Besides, his legs were heavy without the jewel shards, and he didn’t think he could be of any assistance to her. He might not even be able to walk; that last sprint to attack Bankotsu and being hit by Kagome’s spiritual energy had undone quite a bit of healing. So he agreed to stay behind and protect her tiny companions. With any luck, he would heal up quickly and be able to join the battle against Naraku. Once his pack mates finally caught up, he could hand over babysitting duties to them. They weren’t good for a whole lot else, anyway.

Despite his infirmity, however, watching Kagome walk away was one of the hardest things he’d ever done. _Please Kagome…be safe._

* * *

Jakotsu lay immobile amid a pile of rubble, gazing up at the cave ceiling with half-lidded eyes as Inuyasha’s rapid footfalls faded in the distance. _Damn that Inuyasha. He left without finishing me off…such an amateur. Though really, I’m done for._ Not even the Shikon no Tama could save him now. His body was literally in pieces, and his two jewel shards lacked the power to pull him back together. But he also lacked the capability to remove the shards and die on his own. He would have to lie here until someone came to take them, which given how valuable they were probably wouldn’t be long. That was fine with him. _Oh, well, it was a pretty interesting second life._

He didn’t know how long he lay there, alone with his thoughts in that darkness. But when he heard the sound of approaching footsteps, he knew his end was near. He wondered who his executioner was. Inuyasha returned to finish the job? Or perhaps Renkotsu-no-aniki, come to claim the shards for himself. Not that Jakotsu would blame him; only a miracle could save him now.

His eyes widened as the person’s identity became clear, standing over him, gazing down at him with sadness and regret. _Oo-aniki…_ He tried to speak, but was too weak to form words. He did, however, managed a small but sincere smile. _I’m glad it’s you, Oo-aniki. Take my shards and run away from this place. Live._

Bankotsu knelt by his side, and Jakotsu closed his eyes, still smiling as he waited for the end. Instead, he heard a brief rustling, and then his lungs expanded rapidly in a great gasp. A surge of power rushed through his body. Suddenly he could move his previously severed arm again, clench and unclench the fingers on that hand. But he was not whole yet; the shard Bankotsu had given him had only partially reformed his devastated body. So his Oo-aniki gave him another one.

A few moments later, Jakotsu pulled himself gingerly to his feet. The tattered remains of his clothing fell to the cave floor, leaving him nearly naked. He regarded his Oo-aniki with amazement, once more unable to speak, though for an entirely different reason this time. Bankotsu grinned, tossing him a new robe with which to cover himself. In other circumstances, Jakotsu might have recognized the garment as belonging to Renkotsu. Bankotsu had intended to bury it, in a final show of respect to a man who while not always loyal, had fought many battles with the Shichinintai. But Jakotsu’s full attention was drawn solely to the man before him, this loyal friend and leader who had once again sacrificed his own strength in order to save him. And as in the previous instance, the same question came to mind.

"Oo-aniki…why?"

Bankotsu snorted and shook his head. "I can’t believe you still ask me that."

"B-b-but, t-the shards! You need them!"

"I need you more," the Shichinintai leader replied quietly. Jakotsu stared at him adoringly, tears pooling in his eyes. "Oh, don’t look at me like that," Bankotsu scolded, not truly annoyed. "I already told you that you’re the only one I can trust. Besides, I still have plenty of shards."

"Really? How many?"

"Six, plus a few in Banryuu which we took from that Kagome girl."

"Six?" Jakotsu repeated, his mind slowing to a crawl. _If he has six and I have four, that means…ah, I hate math!_ Fortunately, Bankotsu decided to rescue him.

"We’re the only ones left, Jakotsu. Renkotsu and Suikotsu are dead. I have the shards from the other five Shichinintai, plus my own, and some of Kagome’s in Banryuu. You have yours, one of Kagome’s, and both of Kouga’s."

"I don’t know how you keep track of all that," Jakotsu muttered. His head hurt just thinking about it. But the mention of Banryuu had reminded him of his own sword, which he realized sadly was likely damaged beyond repair. Because the blade had been embedded in the side wall of the cave, much of it had escaped Tetsusaiga’s wrath. But the one-third closest to the hilt was decimated, reduced to twisted scrap metal.

"You should have just let me die, Oo-aniki," Jakotsu declared glumly. "I’m not much use without Jakotsutou."

"Just wait a second, I want to try something."

Jakotsu started to protest when Bankotsu removed yet another shard from his body, but his tongue was stilled when Jakotsutou reformed completely as the shard was pressed into the blade. With a shaking hand he picked up the hilt, flicking his wrist to recall the folding blade back to its closed form. He deployed the sword experimentally a couple times before once again regarding his friend with amazement.

"Heh, I thought that might work. The jewel repaired Banryuu, after all. You’re lucky Inuyasha’s attack didn’t catch too much of the blade. It was Inuyasha, wasn’t it?" At Jakotsu’s nod, Bankotsu grinned. "Good. Let’s go kill him then."

"Oo-aniki?"

"I know where he’s heading, and I know a way to cut him off before he gets there. We’ll take him together this time."

Jakotsu happily agreed, clasping Bankotsu’s outstretched hand. He wouldn’t get any ‘alone time’ with Inuyasha this way, but then he wasn’t really ‘in the mood’ anymore after nearly dying by the hanyou’s hand. It would still be nice, however, to slice Inuyasha up. As he entertained these bloodthirsty thoughts, Jakotsu felt a disturbing pulse of energy from deep within. It was as if a foreign force was trying to influence him. He shook it off after a moment. Whatever the strange feeling was, it wasn’t strong enough to overcome him. And for that reason, he decided not to worry about it. Now was not the time for such concerns. It was killing time.

Unknowingly, both Shichinintai shared the same thought. _Wash your neck and wait for us, Inuyasha._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I didn’t go into it, but you can assume that Miroku and Sango’s encounter with Kagura and Saint Hakushin unfolds exactly how it did in the manga. 
> 
> My own personal view of Jakotsu is this: his speech is too riddled with sexual innuendo for it to mean nothing. Most of the time, I believe he’s content to simply kill enemies, either quickly or slowly. But for the select few who really catch his fancy (like Inuyasha), I see his advances becoming not only violent but intensely sexual as well. Again, this is just my own interpretation based on the manga, which doesn’t really show us exactly what Jakotsu’s intentions for Inuyasha were (the barrier goes down before we find out). 
> 
> And if you were disappointed by Kagome’s skills in battle, remember that she’s a schoolgirl from the twentieth century. That she managed to defeat a battle-hardened mercenary with a little luck and quite a bit of help is still pretty impressive in my book. So don’t be too mad at her for getting caught by Bankotsu. If she started going all Black Widow on us, it wouldn’t be in character.


	20. To the Death

Inuyasha growled in frustration. He was making his way deeper into the interior of the mountain, where Naraku’s scent seemed to be the strongest. But the system of caverns and passages was like a maze, and the dark hanyou’s noxious odor permeated the stale air. It was difficult to choose the path which would lead to Naraku rather than a dead end. So his progress was slow, which grated on his nerves. He drew to a halt and inhaled deeply through his nose, once again searching for that elusive olfactory clue which would guide him to his destination. Instead, he caught a scent which was becoming far too familiar—corpse and graveyard soil. And it seemed to be coming from multiple directions. Grimacing, he drew Tetsusaiga.

"Smelled us, did you?" came a voice from just up ahead, a voice which Inuyasha had thought to never hear again.

"You bastard," he swore as Jakotsu strolled casually into view. "How the hell are you still alive?"

"That would be my doing."

Inuyasha whirled around at the new voice, in time to see Bankotsu emerging from the darkness in the opposite direction. Instantly Inuyasha realized what had happened. Since he hadn’t finished Jakotsu off—a mistake which he cursed himself for now—Bankotsu had found him and revived him, probably with more shards of the Shikon no Tama. This was bad. While Bankotsu was a better fighter than his subordinate, Jakotsu’s long sword had given Inuyasha fits in the past. It would probably have been easier if Jakotsu was dead and Bankotsu had all the shards, even if it meant the latter was stronger. And that wasn’t even considering the fact that this would be a two vs. one fight, rather than single combat.

As it was, Inuyasha knew that he couldn’t fight both of them at the same time. And if he stood here and allowed Bankotsu to charge, that was exactly what would happen. The Shichinintai leader hadn’t shown himself capable of anything resembling a ranged attack to this point, so he would have to get in close. Normally Inuyasha would relish that kind of battle, but not with an enemy possessing ranged capabilities at his back. Yes, Jakotsu would have to be careful not to accidentally strike his comrade, but he could still be effective. And if Inuyasha had to fight Bankotsu with less than his full focus, he probably wouldn’t last long.

So he quickly made a decision and executed it. In a flash, he spun on the balls of his feet and launched himself toward Jakotsu. He hoped to catch the mercenary off guard, close the distance and kill him before Bankotsu could come to his aid. But his opponent was ready for this. Jakotsutou lanced out, faster than ever before, and Inuyasha was barely able to raise Tetsusaiga in time to block it. A tremendous _clang_ rang out, and the hanyou was driven back, his feet skidding along the ground. He was actually fortunate to have maintained his footing; the unexpected force of the blow had nearly knocked him on his back, which would likely have spelled the end of him. Jakotsu’s strength had not merely increased; it had at least doubled!

The mercenary smirked as he recalled his sword, but Inuyasha had little time to worry about that or his newfound power. Bankotsu was upon him. The overhand strike the Shichinintai leader sent at him buckled his knees when he caught it on Tetsusaiga’s blade. Next Bankotsu swung Banryuu from the side like a giant sledgehammer, driving Tetsusaiga into Inuyasha’s body and sending him flying back to smash against the cavern wall. The hanyou stumbled, but managed to land on his feet. He kept his guard up, growling quietly as he eyed his enemy.

How was this possible? Bankotsu’s strength had nearly doubled since their last meeting as well. Inuyasha wasn’t a math wizard by any means, but he could perform simple arithmetic. Jakotsu had possessed only two shards a short time ago, so now he must have four or five, plus at least one to repair Jakotsutou. Bankotsu had possessed three shards in his neck and a few in Banryuu, so he must now have at least five or six in his body. Even assuming that the other five members of the Shichinintai were dead, and considering Kagome’s stolen shards, the figures didn’t add up. Where had they found extra Shikon fragments? He seriously doubted that Naraku would have given them any more.

"What’s the matter, Inuyasha?" Bankotsu asked in a mocking tone. "You seem confused. Perhaps wondering how we’ve grown so powerful?"

Something in that tone of voice, that knowing smirk, caused dread to settled in the pit of Inuyasha’s stomach. Kouga was the only other person he knew with jewel shards. And if the wolf was dead or wounded…

"What did you do to Kagome?!" he demanded, tightening his grip on Tetsusaiga as a sudden flash of youki surged through his body, hot and alluring.

Bankotsu chuckled. "Worried about that girl? Come take a few sniffs of my blade. Maybe you’ll smell her blood on it."

Snarling, Inuyasha charged and swung Tetsusaiga with all of his might. But not even his fear-fueled rage could compete with the power of the Shikon no Tama, and after a few exchanged blows he was knocked back in much the same manner as before. As he experimentally arched his sore back and rolled his shoulders, he tried to get his temper under control. It was two vs. one, and a show of brute strength was clearly not going to win the day. Simply put, he couldn’t overpower his enemies. And if he tried, he would wind up getting killed or wounded enough to draw out his youkai side. That had worked to his advantage before, but there was a dramatic difference between Ginkotsu and his current opponents. If he transformed here, Bankotsu and Jakotsu would slice him to pieces.

So Inuyasha resolved to use his brain, something which he could admit was not always his strong suit. It actually helped that Bankotsu had not given him a straight answer about Kagome, perhaps concerned that he would be able to smell a lie. Kagome was clumsy at times, but she was also smart and resourceful. And until the Shichinintai proved to him that she was dead, he would assume that she had managed to survive. He would have faith in her, and in those charged with protecting her. The wolf was clearly useless, but Shippou and Kirara had proven themselves in the past.

Now that he was thinking clearly, Inuyasha remembered something which hadn’t seemed important at the time, but which he now realized might be crucial. When he had charged at Jakotsu, he had caught just a glimpse of another tunnel, leading off to the right. It was probably about halfway between him and the mercenary now, so getting there was not going to be easy. But if he could, then he could at least force both of his opponents to attack him from the same direction. He needed to even these long odds a bit, and that seemed like a good way to do it. But he knew better than to make a mad dash for his objective; this would require a diversion, and some cunning.

The diversion was accomplished easily enough, with a quick Kaze no Kizu directed at Bankotsu. The Shichinintai leader smashed apart the attack as expected and leapt through the resulting dust cloud to counter, but by then Inuyasha was already gone. He wanted his enemies to think this move was merely a delaying tactic, and that his main target was Jakotsu once again. It appeared that both of them did believe this; he could hear Bankotsu sprinting after him, and Jakotsutou was already moving to strike him at long range. _Heh, they probably don’t think I’m smart enough to come up with a good strategy_. He would prove them wrong.

Jakotsu’s blade assaulted him again, but this time he was ready for the rapidity of the strike and managed to deflect it with Tetsusaiga. The snake-like sword would definitely become more difficult to handle as he drew closer to its origination, but fortunately he had only a limited objective in mind. In furtherance of which, he launched a Kaze no Kizu at Jakotsu as well. It wasn’t a full-strength effort because he was on the run, but it didn’t have to be. The mercenary used his sword to smash the incoming blades of youki away with massive, sweeping swings. It was definitely overkill; with his current level of strength, Jakotsu didn’t need such an effort to defeat the attack. But on the other hand, the fresh memory of his body being torn apart by the Kaze no Kizu must have driven him to be extra careful. Inuyasha had counted on it. He veered right and made a beeline for the other tunnel, putting on an extra burst of speed.

Jakotsu’s eyes widened as he finally realized what his prey was up to. The serpentine blade lanced out again, and Inuyasha did his best to deflect it without breaking stride. The scent of his own blood filled the air, but he kept going. Only a few more steps now…but Jakotsutou was approaching again… Inuyasha dove for the opening. Another slice appeared in his back, but his fire-rat limited the damage. He rolled over a few times, then hopped to his feet and turned with Tetsusaiga raised, breathing heavily but feeling quite exhilarated. He had succeeded! While suffering only a couple flesh wounds, he had executed an intelligent plan and potentially turned the tide of this battle. Bankotsu stood outside the tunnel entrance now, regarding him stonily but with a certain degree of respect. Inuyasha reigned in his newfound confidence and retreated further into the tunnel. This was still going to be a hard fight, even one vs. one.

"What do we do now?" he heard Jakotsu ask as the latter approached the scene.

"This tunnel isn’t a dead end," Bankotsu replied. "Head down that way and turn right, then circle back around. You’ll see the other end."

"Are you sure? You know he’ll probably attack you."

"Either of us could take him blindfolded, Jakotsu. We’ll put a hound at both ends of his rabbit hole, and let the little coward decide which one he wants to face."

Inuyasha didn’t appreciate being compared to a cowering rodent, but he bit his tongue. Bankotsu could have simply ordered Jakotsu to stand back and support him if needed, but the Shichinintai leader arrogantly believed he was in no danger. He was probably also concerned that Inuyasha might run away, so by sending Jakotsu to cut off his retreat, he reduced that possibility. In reality, the thought of fleeing was far from the hanyou’s mind. Yes, finding Naraku was his most important goal. But these two were dangerous. If he ran away, and one of his friends later died by their hands, he would never forgive himself. Now that this was more or less a fair one vs. one fight, there was no reason for him to shrink from combat. Grinning, he cracked his knuckles and waited, listening intently as Jakotsu’s footsteps faded in the distance.

"You coming out, little rabbit?" Bankotsu sneered. "Or do I have to come in and get you?"

Inuyasha let his actions provide his answer. He literally came out swinging, the momentum of Tetsusaiga’s first two strikes actually driving Bankotsu back a short distance. But then the mercenary recovered his balance and swatted him away with Banryuu like an annoying insect. And as the cavern wall stopped his ungraceful flight for the third time that afternoon, Inuyasha knew he had to come up with a new strategy. _Dammit! I can’t match him sword-to-sword. He has too many jewel shards. I gotta figure out a way to remove some of them…_

"Still thinking hard, Inuyasha?" Bankotsu taunted. "You could spend a lifetime trying to figure out how to beat me, but it won’t—what?" He broke off as Inuyasha leapt, holding Tetsusaiga menacingly over his head.

"Fool!" the mercenary cried, swinging Banryuu with all of his might. But Inuyasha had no intention of meeting that strike. In the best case, he would wind up making friends with the cavern wall again. Instead, he sheathed Tetsusaiga at the last possible moment, ducking the blade which whizzed past his head and slicing his claws deep into his enemy’s right forearm. Bankotsu stumbled back, clutching his arm as the fallen Banryuu embedded itself uselessly in the earth several meters away. Both combatants observed the two tiny jewel shards which clattered to the ground at Inuyasha’s feet. He was glad his hypothesis had been correct; Kagome had practically destroyed that forearm with her arrow, so logically at least one jewel shard must have been placed there to heal it. Bankotsu glared hatefully at him as the hanyou drew his sword again.

"What’s the matter, Inuyasha?" Bankotsu mocked, though this time his words lacked any real bite. "Too scared to fight me fairly?"

"What happened to there being ‘no dirty tricks’ in a fight to the death?" Inuyasha retorted. Not that he accepted the notion that killing Bankotsu with Tetsusaiga now was a ‘dirty trick’; he had disarmed the mercenary fairly enough, after all. He didn’t even bother to point out that fighting two vs. one wasn’t very fair either. Arrogant bastards like Bankotsu believed they were right, no matter what they did. There would be no convincing him otherwise, but then Inuyasha didn’t require an admission of wrongdoing from his adversary, only his death.

Bankotsu darted in the opposite direction just before Inuyasha released the Kaze no Kizu with a great cry. For a moment it appeared that the mercenary would be sliced to ribbons in front of the cavern wall, but he used his momentum and inhuman agility to run up the vertical rock. As the waves of Tetsusaiga’s youki decimated everything beneath him, Bankotsu somersaulted over the carnage and landed a few meters from the shocked hanyou. Stunned as he was by the acrobatics, Inuyasha could not manage an effective defense. Bankotsu’s first punch knocked Tetsusaiga away. The second pulverized Inuyasha’s right cheek and sent him flying head first into a formation of stalagmites.

Inuyasha worked his jaw as he pulled himself to his feet, deciding he was fortunate that all of his facial bones remained unbroken. He was also glad that he had ripped out a couple jewel shards before taking that hit. Now, he was pretty sure that Bankotsu only had the three in his neck remaining. If that was the case, then he knew from experience that they were evenly matched in terms of strength. He eyed Tetsusaiga and Banryuu, lying at opposite ends of the cavern approximately equidistant from each of them. He debated whether to go for his sword or continue the battle hand-to-hand, and Bankotsu seemed to be doing the same. Finally, Inuyasha decided that the latter approach would be wiser; his claws gave him an advantage that Bankotsu couldn’t compete with. He charged, and whether from arrogance or confidence, the Shichinintai leader accepted his challenge.

They met in a flurry of fist and claw. Inuyasha was ferocity in motion, a crimson blur punctuating his vicious slashes with grunts and animalistic vocalizations. Bankotsu was the silent assassin, using martial arts skill to dodge his enemy’s strikes with minimum energy expenditure. But his own strikes were no less powerful, as Inuyasha himself could attest. Several times the hanyou lunged with what he thought to be a successful attack, only to have Bankotsu spin away at the last moment and plant his fist into his face. But each time Inuyasha found himself lying in a self-made pile of rubble, he bounced back to his feet. Yes, his enemy was a more skillful fighter than he was, possessing far superior technical knowledge of hand-to-hand combat. But he could take a hit and keep on coming. The ability to shrug off blows and continue the battle was one of his greatest strengths, a testament of his determination to win against all odds. It had carried an orphaned hanyou to adulthood, and it was damn sure going to get him out of this mountain alive.

After a few minutes, Bankotsu began to show his frustration. Inuyasha never granted him the opportunity to deal a truly severe blow—to the spinal column at the back of the neck, for example. The hanyou fought with a tremendous amount of reckless abandon, but also with just enough restraint. And with every second that ticked by, every move he observed his opponent make, Inuyasha was gathering information. Finally, it paid off. Bankotsu turned away from a right-handed slash and sent his left fist flying at the hanyou’s exposed cranium. It was a maneuver which had worked two or three times already, but this time instead of skull bone his knuckles impacted the flesh of a palm. Bankotsu’s eyes widened in alarm as the hanyou’s clawed fingers closed around his fist. He howled in pain as Inuyasha wrenched and tore off the appendage, leaving him with only the stump of a forearm.

After that, the battle was essentially over. Bankotsu resisted gamely, but the situation was hopeless. Finally he was driven back against the cavern wall, with nowhere left to retreat to. Inuyasha smashed his remaining hand away, breaking the arm bones in the process, and reared back for a piercing blow directed at the mercenary’s neck. It would have been the end of the battle, but fortune had other plans. For those sensitive ears atop his head swiveled at an unexpected noise behind him, like something sharp cutting through air. He dove to the side, Jakotsutou grazing his fire-rat but failing to draw blood. Bankotsu was not so lucky.

There was a moment when time seemed to freeze, as leader and subordinate gazed at each other from across the cavern. Jakotsu’s eyes were wide with horror, and his hand shook, unwittingly sending tiny vibrations across the sword which carried to where the blade was buried in Bankotsu’s chest. Oddly, the Shichinintai leader smiled, an expression of peace colored only by physical pain, but no anger or blame. Inuyasha did what he thought was the merciful thing, but he had also learned from his previous error. Until a Shichinintai was actually dead, he was never truly defeated. So with a swipe of his claws he removed Bankotsu’s throat without hesitation, along with the three Shikon fragments located there. He was glad when the mercenary dissolved to dust, instead of clinging to life with another hidden jewel shard, but his satisfaction at his victory was short-lived. The instant Jakotsutou withdrew from the rock where it had been embedded, snapping back to its owner with a series of audible metallic clicks, Inuyasha knew he was in trouble.

Jakotsu howled mournfully, a cry which might have been the word ‘no’ but was too inhuman to identify. Then he attacked, his eyes alight with unbridled rage. Inuyasha drew Tetsusaiga and used both hands to block the incoming strike, dropping the jewel shards in the process. Even with that effort, he still could not withstand the tremendous impact. He stumbled back a few steps, barely recovering his footing before the next blow came. This pattern repeated until Jakotsu stood at the spot where Bankotsu had met his end. Then at last the series of frantic attacks and anguished cries ceased. Jakotsu still snarled rabidly with every breath, but there was some hint of sanity left in his gaze, enough to drive him to bend down and pick up Bankotsu’s jewel shards.

Inuyasha, seeing this as the potential disaster that it was, moved to intervene, but Jakotsutou swatted him aside harder than he could have imagined. As he staggered to his feet, Inuyasha could only watch as his adversary claimed each and every Shikon fragment discarded by his former leader, even the few stored in Banryuu. Some he added to his body, and some he placed in his sword. Jakotsu howled again, but this time when he opened his eyes, all traces of sanity were gone. His irises had shrunk to tiny dark specs, bloodshot white sclera giving him a wild appearance. He pulsed with dark energy, which began flowing down his sword, casting the entire blade in a sinister glow. It took only a moment for Inuyasha to realize what was happening. Jakotsu did not possess the mental strength to control all of the Shikon fragments in his possession. The shards, feeding off of his own despair and hatred, were becoming corrupted. And in turn, they possessed him mind and body. He was no longer the man known as Jakotsu of the Shichinintai. He was a monster, driven only by darkness, who would never stop killing until his body was destroyed. Inuyasha vowed to end that rampage here, before it began.

The Kaze no Kizu he launched was more designed to gauge his enemy’s strength than to do actual damage, but even so the results were disappointing. Jakotsu snuffed out the attack with barely a flick of his wrist, then drew back his sword. In that split second when the gracefully curving blade of Jakotsutou hovered in the air, glowing ethereally, Inuyasha could imagine that he was facing not a sword, but a serpentine daiyoukai. And when it struck, faster than a viper, he thought he caught a glimpse of a giant snake’s head, fangs bared.

The power of that strike was indescribable. Inuyasha thought he might have blacked out after the impact, because the next thing he knew, he was lying in a heap twenty meters away from where he’d been standing. And his body hurt, a _lot_. Jakotsu came on unrelenting, with unavoidable strikes punctuated by hissed exclamations of loathing. By the third, Inuyasha was questioning his ability to survive against this onslaught. By the fifth, he was struggling to stand. He leaned against Tetsusaiga on his knees, glaring at his enemy. In what might have been a final act of defiance, he spit blood onto the ground in Jakotsu’s direction. The mercenary was unmoved. A mindless animal concerned only with blood and slaughter, he raised his great serpentine weapon for the final strike.

A brilliant light flared into existence overhead, shooting into the massive blade like a great spear. Sword and master hissed as one, even as another projectile _thunked_ into Jakotsu’s shoulder. The intensity of the dark youki lessened momentarily, until the crazed mercenary tore the arrow from his flesh and snapped it in his hand. Then the serpentine blade deployed once more, this time with a new target in mind. With a terrified scream, Kagome did the only thing she could—she leapt into the abyss, just before Jakotsutou pulverized the overhanging ledge where she had taken refuge.

Time slowed to a crawl for Inuyasha, as he observed Kagome free-falling, clutching her stomach protectively. It would do no good; from that height, both mother and child would suffer mortal injuries. Somehow he willed his bruised and battered body to motion, half-running and half-limping to the point where Kagome’s trajectory would meet the earth. Fortunately, the distance was not so great. He caught her smoothly, checking his enemy’s position as soon as he had her secured in his arms. Fortunately so, because Jakotsutou was already on its way.

Inuyasha leapt, somehow avoiding the strike. It was dumb luck, he knew, not likely to repeat itself, especially with him wounded and carrying Kagome. Out of the corner of his eye he spotted a small open space, barely a crack in the rock really, but large enough to shelter his human cargo. It was located at the base of a large stone pillar rising nearly to the ceiling of the cavern, perhaps two or three meters in diameter near the base. Mentally counting down the milliseconds until Jakotsutou sliced both of them in half, he crossed the short distance and shoved Kagome into the crevice. Then he turned and planted Tetsusaiga into the dirt sideways, crouching and putting his shoulder against the blade.

The impact slammed him back into the pillar as Tetsusaiga howled in pain, but the sword held long enough for him to recover and position himself to receive the next strike. He grunted with the effort, every time Jakotsutou crashed into Tetsusaiga, his hair blackening from the youki which burst from the blades at each clash. Life narrowed for Inuyasha, until he was living only during each dreaded blow and the scant period in which to breathe between them. He lacked the ability to reflect on how long he could hold out like this; he only knew that he would die before Kagome did. That was the best he could do.

Finally Jakotsu, who had closed the distance between himself and his prey, grew tired of the constant barrage. He swung his sword laterally, allowing it to wrap around the pillar like a giant constrictor. Inuyasha cried out as the pressure changed from momentary to constant, a vice-like grip slowly tilting Tetsusaiga’s blade inward. He redoubled his efforts, but was gradually pushed back. His exhausted muscles screamed in pain, the dark youki burning the flesh of his hands and arms as it sparked against Tetsusaiga. He ignored everything except his sword, and keeping it standing firm against the onslaught. Absently he wondered what would fail first: his strength, Tetsusaiga’s blade, or the pillar of rock at his back.

He gasped as he felt her body press against his back, her arms embracing him from behind. At once he was bathed in her soothing scent. It chased away the pain for a moment, made him feel that all was right with the world. But the illusion dissipated quickly, as cold reality settled back in.

"Ka…go…me," he muttered, attempting to tell her to go back into her crevice but only able to muster those three syllables.

"Shh," she cooed, her voice oddly calm in this moment of peril. "Let me support you. Trust me, Inuyasha."

He did, and though he could manage only the tiniest of nods, which she could not see from her position, she seemed to understand. He felt more than saw the energy which emanated from the woman at his back. Hesitant at first, but quickly growing in confidence and power. He understood the reason for her initial reticence; her spiritual energy should logically be burning him right now. In his weakened state, he wasn’t sure he could survive a purification. Even if he did, his human form might succumb to his wounds. He would have told her to go through with it anyway, not that she would have listened. Fortunately, it appeared that she would not have to make that decision. Her spiritual energy washed over him and Tetsusaiga, causing neither pain nor discomfort. He likened it to being immersed in water which was the exact same temperature as his body. He could feel it there, but the sensation was completely neutral.

Kagome’s power was not, however, without potency. The youki of the Shikon fragments reacted violently with the pure energy as soon as the two opposing forces came into contact. The battle raged between light and dark, good and evil, with neither side gaining an advantage. Until Inuyasha decided that he’d had enough of observing. He gripped Tetsusaiga’s hilt tighter with his scorched hands, calling upon the sword’s youki to emerge. Golden lightning erupted, surging forth, swirling with the pink light of Kagome’s aura. Together, the two forces drove back the darkness, as the metal underneath the conflict cracked and strained. Finally, Jakotsutou could take no more. It shattered into a thousand pieces, every centimeter of steel from the tip of the blade to the hilt crumbling to the cave floor.

Jakotsu howled with rage, then clenched his fists and charged. He still possessed many jewel shards within his body, and could tear both of them apart with his bare hands if he so desired. Inuyasha did not intend to give him that chance. He tried to lurch to his feet but stumbled, and would have fallen if not for Kagome catching him under the arms. She supported his body weight long enough for him to get his feet under him again, then helped him stand. He leaned his wounded and exhausted form against her, raising Tetsusaiga with shaking arms. _Please support me, Kagome. For just a little longer._

Neither of them would die here today. Kagome would make it out of this cave alive. She would give birth, nurse their child, and raise it to become a fine young man or woman. And he would be there. By all the Kami, he would be there. He poured his heart into the Kaze no Kizu, and behind him he sensed Kagome doing the same. Pink and gold joined together, surging and cascading to a great crescendo. The two powers engulfed Jakotsu, enveloping him in blinding light. His anguished cry ceased abruptly, and when the light faded, nothing remained of the former Shichinintai attack captain.

Kagome slumped limply against Inuyasha’s back, and he hastily knelt as he turned to catch her. He panicked for a moment, but upon laying her down he noted that she appeared to be merely unconscious. Still, he tapped her cheeks and worriedly called her name a few times before she began to stir.

"Inu…yasha?" she asked, clearly disoriented.

"Kagome!" he exclaimed, immensely relieved simply to hear her voice. "Are you okay?"

It took a moment for clarity to return to Kagome’s gaze, but then she nodded. "I’m fine. My head just hurts a bit. I think I overdid it with my spiritual energy," she admitted, grinning wryly.

"You over—ugh," Inuyasha groaned as he flopped onto his back next to her. He simultaneously wanted to laugh, cry, and yell at her. Instead, he closed his eyes and tried to slow his breathing. After an intense period of exertion, and the beating his body had taken, it was an immense relief to simply relax for a few minutes. Naraku ostensibly still waited deep within the mountain, but he needed to recover some of his strength before facing the dark hanyou. Besides, Kagome had just passed out, and he wasn’t about to move her until he was sure she was okay.

"Are you all right, Inuyasha?" Kagome asked, concerned by his uncharacteristic behavior.

"Fine," he grunted, only elaborating when an expectant silence ensued. "No broken bones, nothing that needs bandaging. Just…let me rest for a bit, wench."

He knew he was covering his weakness with gruffness, and hoped Kagome didn’t take offense. While he hadn’t lied to her, he hadn’t told the whole truth either. His body had endured incredible stress during the battles against Bankotsu and Jakotsu. Even one of those blows from the youki-possessed Jakotsutou would have turned a human into a puddle of fleshy goo with bits of shattered bone sticking out. His body was made of tough stuff, but it wasn’t invincible. None of his bones felt broken, but quite a few of them were probably fractured. Nothing that his youkai blood wouldn’t heal on its own, given time. He couldn’t afford to rest for more than a few minutes, but that was better than hobbling into battle in his current state. The short break would at least take the edge off the pain which would surely result from moving around.

Kagome made no comment, but he suspected that she comprehended more about his condition that she let on. After all, she must have seen him take a few of those blows. Which brought him to the question of how the hell she had gotten here, _alone_ , in the first place. He looked over and opened his mouth to berate her, but froze as he caught her gaze. She was leaning up on one elbow, staring at him with moisture shining her eyes. Suddenly the thought of yelling at her seemed repugnant. She had nearly watched him die, after all, and her intervention _had_ saved his life. There was absolutely no doubt about that. He held out his hand to her, meaning for her to grab hold for comfort. She must have misinterpreted, however, for instead she scooted over and curled into his side, resting her head on his shoulder.

Inuyasha found that he didn’t mind. He wrapped his arm around her and held her close, savoring her scent. She sniffled once, but held back her tears. Her small form shook with every breath, however, as she recovered from yet another traumatic experience. Inuyasha wished he could make it better, but that was beyond his power. He settled for offering her his free hand, allowing her to clutch it tightly like a lifeline. He wished he could give her a peaceful life, one free of danger. But he also had to gather the fragments of the Shikon no Tama and destroy Naraku, and he could do neither without her. So as much as it pained him to see her like this, it also filled him with pride. His Kagome, his clumsy human girl from a world where water flowed in every house and food was bought rather than caught or grown, was becoming a warrior. In the heat of the moment, her intelligence and determination had shone through brilliantly.

"How did you know you could do that?" he asked gently.

He felt her shrug against him. "I didn’t," she responded, and Inuyasha waited patiently for her to explain. "I…didn’t know what to do, Inuyasha. You w-were… _dying_ up there. Originally, I just wanted to be by your side, at the end. But then I remembered that Kaede-baa-chan taught me how to channel my spiritual energy around the baby. So I thought, maybe I could channel it around you and Tetsusaiga too."

"Fucking brilliant," he told her, completely serious. And it really was. Two opposite and opposing forces, normally mortal enemies, working together in harmony. That was him and Kagome in a nutshell, minus the harmony sometimes. All due to one miko’s ability to accept, and possibly even love, a man with youkai blood. _Heh, I wonder what Sesshoumaru and all of his stuck-up daiyoukai buddies would think about what just happened._ Or Kikyou, for that matter. He shook his head to clear it. This moment was not about Kikyou.

To his surprise, Kagome snorted and started giggling softly. "Only you could make a compliment sound like an insult," she said after a moment.

"Keh. I meant it, wench. That _was_ fucking brilliant."

"Thanks," she replied sincerely, knowing how rare an Inuyasha compliment could be.

The hanyou only shook his head and sighed in mock regret. "Had my ass saved by humans twice in one day," he lamented jokingly. When Kagome only glanced at him in confusion, he endeavored to explain. "When Miroku and Sango brought down the barrier, I was already in trouble. Damn stupid barrier."

"Have you seen them? Are they okay?"

"Dunno. I’m sure they’re fine. The bouzu for one is too stubborn to die before finding someone to bear his child."

"I hope you’re right," Kagome stated, clearly worried about their friends. Inuyasha was worried too, truth be told, but he would try not to show it. Turning the conversation away from that topic, he got down to something he was very curious about.

"So what happened out there?" _And why the hell isn’t that idiot wolf protecting you? I swear, he’d better be dead, or I’m gonna fucking kill him myself!_

"When the barrier went down, Kouga-kun, Shippou-chan, Kirara and I headed for Mount Hakurei to try to help. But we were ambushed by Renkotsu."

"You were _what?!_ "

Rolling her eyes, Kagome relayed the succinct version of the battle against the fire-user. She left out some details, like how exactly Bankotsu had come to possess Kouga’s jewel shards. The knowledge that she had been at the mercy of the Shichinintai leader might throw Inuyasha into a nervous tantrum. She merely mentioned that Kouga ‘lost the shards’ and Bankotsu ‘took them.’ Fortunately, Inuyasha was too busy contemplating how to best butcher the incompetent ookami to notice. Evidently some of his homicidal thoughts slipped out verbally.

"Inuyasha! Don’t blame Kouga-kun. It’s my fault that we got ambushed too."

"Yeah, but _he’s_ the one with the good senses. And _he’s_ the one I fucking _told_ to look after you."

Kagome couldn’t argue with either of those points, but she still didn’t want Inuyasha harboring murderous thoughts concerning her friend.

"Well, things worked out in the end, ne?"

Maybe it was their close proximity, but her voice came out with much more of a sensual undertone than she intended. Inuyasha certainly didn’t miss it, if the way his head snapped around to stare at her was any indication. Matching dustings of pink appeared on both of their cheeks, as each recalled the more pleasant private moments the two of them had shared recently. But both sensed that _this_ moment wasn’t right for such intimacy. Though no one had bothered them since Jakotsu’s demise, this was still decidedly enemy territory. And physically, both of them felt pretty crappy right now, Inuyasha especially.

Kagome gingerly rose into a sitting position, holding her head with a sheepish grin as she gazed down at him. The hanyou did likewise, embarrassed but amused as well. He rolled into a crouch, then hopped to his feet when nothing felt out of place. Moving his body was painful, as expected, but it was pain he could deal with. At least now he could be confident that his body would hold up in a fight, and that he would be able to protect Kagome. Just because _some people_ could fuck up such a simple task, didn’t mean he would. He offered her a hand up and pulled her to her feet, watching the whole time for any sign of dizziness. He was glad that there was none, but still wasn’t completely satisfied.

"Promise me you won’t overdo it again," he demanded seriously.

Kagome thought about it and nodded. In actuality, she was dealing with moderate fatigue and a dull throbbing in her temple, but otherwise felt good to go. It appeared that her fainting spell really was just a case of overdoing it with her spiritual energy, like a lightning surge temporarily knocking out the electricity in a house. She hoped to avoid using any significant amount of power in the near future, but would be careful if that proved impossible. But since they were on the topic, she had a condition of her own.

"And you as well. Promise me that _you_ won’t overdo it."

"Keh. I told you I was fine."

"Inuyasha…"

"All right already," he agreed, seeing that she wasn’t fooled. Even battered as he was, he could do quite a bit without ‘overdoing it,’ in his own opinion. Whether he and Kagome agreed on the definition of the phrase was another matter, but he would cross that bridge when he came to it.

"Help me find all the damn jewel shards, will you?" Inuyasha asked, motioning toward the interior of the cavern. "I hope they weren’t scattered too far when we blasted Jakotsu to pieces."

Kagome nodded, having noticed said shards upon first entering the cavern and seeing the plight Inuyasha was in. There had been other tunnels she could have taken when entering the mountain, but fate or luck had caused her to choose the one which led her to him. Fortunately for both of them. There was a problem, however, one she discovered only upon focusing her miko senses.

"Where are they?" she gasped.

"What?"

"The shards! They’re gone!" Closing her eyes, she stretched out her senses until she located them. "There!" she exclaimed, pointing to an unseen point deep in the mountain. "It feels like…they’re moving deeper as we speak."

"Let’s go," Inuyasha replied, kneeling down. Kagome climbed onto his back, and the two of them set off at what for the hanyou would be considered a fast jog. But Inuyasha really didn’t want to push it too hard too fast, not with precious cargo on his back.

He paused in his stride when he reached the interior of the cavern, sniffing the air. It didn’t smell right. The ground didn’t feel right against the soles of his feet. And the walls certainly didn’t look right. There was definitely something disturbing about this place now, but he couldn’t put his finger on it until Kagome spoke.

"Inuyasha, I don’t think this is rock anymore. I think it’s…a wall of flesh!"

She was right, he realized immediately. _Things just get creepier and creepier._ But retreat was not an option. Naraku was ahead, and both of them wanted their child to be born into a world without the dark hanyou. Now, it was time to make it so.

Clutching Kagome’s legs tightly, Inuyasha raced into the darkness.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – In the manga, Bankotsu had seven jewel shards in his body, while in this story he only has five because he gave some to Jakotsu. So that’s why he isn’t quite as strong as in canon, and Inuyasha is able to defeat him more easily. The Jakotsu thing was obviously new. I hope that wasn’t too confusing. I tried to foreshadow what was going to happen last chapter—remember the uncomfortable feeling Jakotsu had after receiving the extra jewel shards? Once Bankotsu died and he took even more shards into his body, he completely lost it, needless to say.


	21. Naraku's True Objective

Kagome sighed miserably as she trudged along at the rear of the group. Sango had stayed with her for moral support, but the taijiya seemed to understand that she wasn’t in the mood for conversation. She was _really_ in the mood for a nap; pregnancy and sleep deprivation did not mix well. But she was damn sure not going to ask Inuyasha to carry her. He was so lost in his own private torment, that he probably wouldn’t hear a word she said anyway. Part of her wanted to be mad at him, but her sympathy outweighed her jealousy. He had lost the woman he loved, after all.

Naraku had escaped. Again. They had briefly encountered the dark hanyou in the interior of Mount Hakurei, but he hadn’t seemed very interested in fighting them. He had shown Inuyasha that Tetsusaiga could no longer penetrate his barrier, and gloated that Kouga’s jewel shards now belonged to him as well, courtesy of their mutual ‘ineptitude.’ But then he had retreated, leaving the mountain collapsing behind him. It was a fairly feeble trap by Naraku’s standards, and Inuyasha had gotten them out with relative ease. Once outside, they finally met up with Miroku and Sango, who had made their own escape. All in all, it had been a fairly anticlimactic encounter, compared to their epic confrontation with Jakotsu. That is, until Inuyasha had suddenly run off without a word. At the time, Kagome hoped she’d imagined the flicker of that familiar look in his eyes, the one she’d come to associate with Kikyou.

She had not. By the time they caught up to Inuyasha, he was alone. Kikyou was gone, cast into the miasma below by Naraku; all that remained of her was her broken bow. The dark hanyou had fled, and Sesshoumaru, who had confirmed Kikyou’s death with a few cruel words, had departed as well. Kagome shuddered at the memory of the haunted look on Inuyasha’s face, the lifelessness in his eyes. He almost seemed dead inside, as he asked them in a disturbing monotone to set up camp somewhere. He didn’t tell them when he would return, and no one dared to ask. They had done as he’d requested, joining up with Shippou and Kirara, as well as Kouga and his pack. And while everyone else, including the youkai, had fallen asleep during the night, Kagome had remained awake until the first light of dawn crested over the remnants of Mount Hakurei, when Inuyasha finally returned. She knew immediately that he hadn’t found any trace of Kikyou. He seemed surprised to find her awake, and apologized while stating that he was ‘okay’ now. Then he’d walked away, and hadn’t said another word to anyone since.

Kagome put a hand over her mouth but couldn’t stifle her yawn. It was now the middle of the afternoon on the day after her all-nighter, and she was _beat_. Her headache from the day before had never completely gone away, probably due to lack of sleep. She almost felt physically ill, but hoped it was merely the combination of normal fatigue and exhaustion from overusing her spiritual energy.

"Do you want to take a rest, Kagome-chan?" Sango asked gently, to which Kagome shook her head in response. "Well, we’ll stop early tonight," the taijiya stated, in a tone which would permit no argument. "If Inuyasha doesn’t like it, I’ll whack him with hiraikotsu a few times. You’re pregnant, Kagome-chan. You shouldn’t push yourself."

The unintentional mention of the hanyou only made Kagome feel worse. But she couldn’t argue with Sango’s reasoning. Once it was explained to him, she didn’t think Inuyasha would protest too much either. But she was glad that Sango was willing to fight with him in her place, if necessary. She definitely didn’t feel up for that, and her sympathy meant that she really didn’t want to ‘osuwari’ him in order to get her way. But she did need to rest, for the baby’s sake; there was no doubt about that.

The pair lapsed into silence until Sango spoke up excitedly a few minutes later. "Oh, look, Kagome-chan! There’s a village up ahead."

Kagome raised her eyes to confirm that observation, then glanced doubtfully over at Sango. But the look in the taijiya’s eyes said that they _would_ be stopping at this village for the night, as long as they could find a place to stay. Regardless of what any other members of the group thought about it.

"A good-sized village like this might even have a _hot spring_ nearby!" Sango observed brightly, clearly trying to cheer her friend up. Kagome nearly moaned at the thought; a hot bath sounded positively divine. She was still covered in the dirt and sweat from all of the battles yesterday, and she probably didn’t smell very good. If only that was the reason why Inuyasha didn’t want to walk with her. But before she could start thinking about him and Kikyou again, Sango spoke up.

"I was actually hoping to find a hot spring soon, anyway. I…wanted to talk to you in private, Kagome-chan. When Houshi-sama and I were on Mount Hakurei…well…"

Now _that_ got Kagome’s full attention. Sango didn’t look like she wanted to say any more until they were alone. Kagome could respect that, but now she was extremely curious. It wasn’t every day that something happened between the amorous monk and the reserved taijiya. Had they kissed? Had they confessed their feelings? _Tch, maybe they got drunk and slept together._ She snorted at her own joke, but wisely kept it to herself. If that had been the case, she was pretty sure that Miroku’s male ego would have grown large enough to block out the sun by now.

Sango grinned at her, despite her obvious embarrassment. She was glad she had given Kagome something to look forward to aside from another evening alone with her misery. The miko’s obvious interest in her and Miroku’s love lives could come across as meddlesome at times, but Sango had learned to appreciate it. Her friend cared about her, wanted her to be happy. And it was honestly nice sometimes to get another woman’s opinion of a man’s behavior, especially a man like Miroku who could send mixed signals. And that was putting it lightly.

After all, it wasn’t as though she and Houshi-sama had really _done_ anything. _No! I won’t leave you. We’ll die together!_ Her face flamed at the memory. Afterwards, it had taken her a few moments to recall everything that had transpired. But she remembered it all, down to the finest detail. The despair she’d felt at the realization that she was about to lose him. How life hadn’t seemed worth living unless he was by her side. And how she’d thrown herself against his chest, tearful eyes closed, prepared to let the youkai consume her.

Miroku’s behavior toward her hadn’t changed since then, for which she was grateful. The hand-holding was still somewhat uncomfortable for her at times, though she genuinely enjoyed it. Moving beyond that was still out of the question, and perhaps he understood that. She had walls of her own, like the other warrior of the group, which took time to come down. That Houshi-sama was apparently willing to give her that time before pushing things too far made her very happy. He’d already shown his respect for her by refraining from groping her after slipping up at the temple, but this went a step beyond.

Then again, he hadn’t really had much in the way of an opportunity to flirt with other women since their recovery. She was curious what would happen the next time they came across a peaceful village inhabited by a few comely eligible lasses. Maybe the village just up ahead would qualify, and she’d have her answer. In that case, she would definitely want to talk privately with Kagome as soon as possible. The younger girl was a bit naïve about love, in Sango’s opinion, but her positive attitude was always encouraging. Kagome was the type of person who believed in the adage ‘love conquers all,’ that if two people were meant to be together, things would work out. She applied that outlook to Sango’s relationship with Miroku, but not to her own relationship with Inuyasha. Probably because she didn’t yet believe that the two of them were destined to be together. Not that Sango could blame her, given how things had turned out. She just hoped that Inuyasha didn’t pine after Kikyou for too long. Kagome was hurting too, seeing him so depressed _because_ he didn’t have the dead miko in his life anymore. And if Inuyasha insisted on moping for more than what the taijiya felt was appropriate under the circumstances, she might just have to give him something to really cry about. But for the moment, they would all try to be patient with him. He obviously needed time to cope with Kikyou’s apparent demise. He just had to snap out of it before he did too much damage to his relationship with Kagome.

Unfortunately, all romantic concerns would need to be put on the back burner for a while; they had a very ‘real world’ tragedy to deal with.

"This is terrible," Sango stated as she caught a full glimpse of the carnage.

"Low-level youkai," Inuyasha muttered, his first words since early that morning. "From Mount Hakurei, most likely."

His friends nodded in agreement. This was the first village they had come across like this, but it probably wouldn’t be the last. A great swarm of youkai had emerged from Mount Hakurei, likely half-starved and ravenous. It was no wonder that nothing remained of the former inhabitants of the village except bones and tattered clothing. The Inu-gang was too late to save them, but they could at least bury the dead. Without a word, Inuyasha grabbed a shovel and began to dig a grave, evidently not in the mood to burrow in the dirt with his hands like a dog. His friends started gathering up the victims’ remains with practiced ease. They had become far too proficient at this sort of work.

The preparations were nearly complete when a stranger appeared over a rise down the road little ways. He was a traveling monk, who graciously offered to assist with the burial. He seemed to not be in the best of health, so the Inu-gang politely declined. Instead, they sat him down and heard his story. That same morning he had assisted some of the local daimyo’s soldiers with burying the dead from another village ravaged by youkai. And he seemed to know that the youkai had come from Mount Hakurei, which surprised them until he suddenly spoke of a miko, drawing everyone’s rapt attention. Apparently, an injured miko had washed ashore on a riverbank on the other side of Mount Hakurei the previous evening. No one doubted that this was Kikyou, especially not after the monk stated that the miko had mentioned Naraku by name. He also said that she might already have succumbed to her wounds, and likely wouldn’t survive much longer. That was the kicker for Kagome. As much as she didn’t want Inuyasha to go, she knew he _needed_ to.

He didn’t argue with her, muttering only a quiet apology as he gazed at her feet with a guilty expression. He was not able to meet her eyes, which oddly made his departure easier to deal with. A part of her took grim satisfaction in the knowledge that he felt bad for leaving her to go search for the twisted abomination which used to be his first love. But this was also the part of her that wished the rumor concerning Kikyou was a hoax, and the dead miko was really _dead_ this time. Needless to say, Kagome did not enjoy encountering this side of herself. And so, because she did still feel a tremendous amount of sympathy for Inuyasha, she resolved to try not to add to his misery by making him feel guiltier than he already was. If Kikyou truly was no longer roaming this Earth, then she would support him as he grieved, and hopefully he would be able to move on eventually. And if she was ‘alive’…

Kagome sighed. Never had returning to the status quo seemed like such an undesirable outcome. And there was that little voice in her head again, whispering of all the wonderful things which could come to pass if Kikyou was no longer standing between her and Inuyasha. Her dreams were finally within her grasp, so long as her hanyou was finally free of his—

"Gah!" Kagome exclaimed, tossing her arms over her head in frustration and storming off down the road. Her friends followed wordlessly, no one commenting on her strange behavior. They knew she was hurting, and probably assumed that she didn’t want to spend the night in what was for all intents and purposes a ghost town. This was actually true, but really Kagome just wanted to burn off some steam and take her mind off of her dark thoughts. _When did I become such a horrible person?_ What had she said to Kouga? _"It’s only natural, when you love someone."_ ‘It’ meaning to wish for the death of a rival in love. But it didn’t feel natural; it felt shameful. She was glad that none of her friends possessed powers of telepathy.

They had traveled maybe half a kilometer before a group of soldiers appeared in the road up ahead, perhaps the very same soldiers the wandering monk had aided that morning. They didn’t look particularly friendly, so despite her frustration Kagome yielded the road. Once her momentum ceased, her fatigue hit her like a ton of bricks. She put her hand to her head, suddenly wanting nothing more than to lie down and sleep for at least twelve hours. Unfortunately, fate had other ideas. Instead of passing by, the leader of the squad reigned up before them, glaring at them suspiciously.

"You lot will come with us peacefully," he announced. "Due to the strange events which have taken place recently, all suspicious outsiders are to be brought the castle."

Kagome’s shoulders slumped. Of all the times to get hassled by some pompous ass who thought he was better than everyone else just because some other pompous ass had put him in charge… She could practically kiss her bath and peaceful night’s rest goodbye. Judging by their whispered conversation, Miroku and Sango thought they could escape at any time, but weren’t comfortable knocking fellow humans around without real provocation. Kagome could understand that, but it didn’t make the experience of being roughly manhandled and bound with rope any less unpleasant. When one of the soldiers poked her in the right buttock with a stick to get her moving, she _almost_ spun around kicked the offending bastard in the balls. It was only the fear that said bastard would retaliate by hitting her in the stomach—not realizing she was pregnant—which kept her facing forward. But if looks could kill, the pompous ass on the horse would have a grapefruit-sized hole in the back of his skull. As she did not possess this power, however, his head remained intact and he continued to lead his prisoners back to the castle. Kagome sighed. _This day just keeps getting better and freaking better._

Screw sympathy. Inuyasha was getting ‘osuwari’d’ into a crater when he got back.

Off to the side, a kitsune and a neko youkai huddled in the tall grass, having avoided detection due to their small stature. Kirara growled, her fur standing on end, but she knew her mistress’s feelings on harming humans. Shippou petted her for a few moments to soothe her. He too had heard Miroku and Sango’s conversation. Even held captive as they were, they believed they had the situation under control. So he wouldn’t interfere either, which left him two options: follow them discreetly to the castle, or go retrieve Inuyasha. He ultimately chose the latter, just in case this wasn’t an innocent misunderstanding as his friends seemed to believe. If it was something more, Inuyasha’s assistance could prove crucial. He just hoped he could track the hanyou down.

"Are you feeling better, Kirara?" he asked when the humans were gone. The fire-cat ‘mewed’ and transformed, with somewhat more difficulty than normal. But she held her large form, and motioned for him to climb aboard. The two of them set off without delay. It would be difficult to catch up to Inuyasha, since Shippou was sure that the hanyou was running at full speed in the opposite direction. But they would do their best. _Kagome, Sango, Miroku…be safe._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – This was really short, I know. I originally wrote this chapter and the next one as a single chapter, but decided to break it up due to length. Chapter 22 will be up within a week. 
> 
> And I apologize if you were anticipating the battle with Naraku inside Mount Hakurei, but the truth is that it probably would have followed the canon script pretty closely. The signature battle of this whole Shichinintai arc was supposed to be the one last chapter, and writing another one just seemed like overkill to me.


	22. Limbo

Inuyasha moved at a full sprint, ghosting over the grassy fields and appearing as nothing more than a crimson blur. He had multiple reasons for his haste. The first was obviously Kikyou’s apparent peril. The second he preferred not to think about, not that ignoring it helped to assuage his guilt. He was alone, but that sour emotion followed him as a constant companion, and not unjustifiably so. But this would be a quick detour, would it not? The wandering monk had apparently covered about a half-day’s journey at human walking speed before reaching them with news of Kikyou. Inuyasha could cover that ground in thirty minutes or less. He was already more than halfway there, he’d guess. There were things, however, which would serve to extend his absence. For example, if Kikyou was wounded and needed someone to watch over her. Or if she was dying and needed a friend to hold her hand as she passed on. Or…if she was already dead, and needed someone to see to her remains.

If any of those scenarios proved true, then Kagome would just have to deal with it. The backlash of _that_ thought manifested itself as physical pain inside his cranium, as if the remorseful part of his brain was kicking him in the head. _You left yesterday to look for Kikyou without a thought for Kagome, and she stayed up all night waiting for you. Ungrateful bastard._ Maybe that was too harsh. He was immensely grateful for the way Kagome cared so intensely for him. _Well, you have a funny way of showing it._

At any rate, he couldn’t deny that he was indeed a colossal bastard. He had wanted to offer to carry Kagome this morning, to let her nap on his back as she’d done after that fateful evening which had changed both of their lives forever. But it wouldn’t be fair to her, to hold her so close while his mind was with Kikyou. At the time, the dead miko had literally been all he could think about. He couldn’t, _wouldn’t_ do that to Kagome. If he was going to touch her in any manner, she deserved for him to be thinking about _her_ , and only her. Quite simply, he hadn’t felt worthy of the privilege.

In part due to these semi-honorable intentions, Kagome had not gotten a wink of sleep in approximately thirty-six hours. During that time, she had battled Renkotsu, run through Mount Hakurei in a mad search for him, and helped him slay Jakotsu. Not to mention walking all day and burying the inhabitants of a devastated village. Yes, the woman carrying his child had done all that and not slept, predominantly due to his lack of consideration. And if he didn’t come back tonight, he could run up her insomnia meter to forty-eight hours or more. Because he knew she would not allow herself to sleep until he returned.

Was he really going to abandon the woman carrying his child for a second straight evening? To search for his first love, a woman he wasn’t even sure he had ever shared true love with? When he put it that way, it seemed a ridiculous notion. It wasn’t as though there was no danger associated with leaving Kagome alone, either. Unlike the last time Naraku fled from them, he had not been wounded to the point of needing to go into hiding. To the contrary, he was more powerful than ever. Knowing the dark hanyou, he was probably spinning his next web of deceit to trick or trap his enemies. And he, Inuyasha, who liked to think that he _wasn’t_ a complete idiot, had left Kagome alone. Well, not alone, per se. Their friends were strong, but they didn’t stand a chance of defeating Naraku on their own as he was now. So for all intents and purposes, Kagome really was pretty defenseless right now if the dark hanyou decided to show up.

This thought had Inuyasha slowing his pace and eventually drawing to a halt, though he did not turn around. He clenched his fists, now torn more than ever before between the needs of the two women in his life. Why had it taken him so long to consider how dangerous it was to separate from Kagome? Perhaps the grief over Kikyou’s apparent demise had been too fresh yesterday, though that still seemed a fairly lame excuse. Yes, Kikyou might need him right now. But Kagome needed him as well. For if there was a potential that his absence might cause her physical harm, there was no doubt that it was hurting her emotionally.

This he had already considered—it was the primary reason for his guilt, after all—but he had pushed it aside as secondary to Kikyou’s very real physical plight. Wounded feelings weren’t as bad as a wounded body, after all. Or so he’d used to think. Now, after knowing Kagome for as long as he had, he wasn’t so sure. She had never suffered a truly severe injury during their entire quest, but on at least two occasions now, he had done nearly enough emotional damage to send her through the well, never to return. The first had been when she’d seen him and Kikyou embracing near Goshinboku. The second had been in the aftermath of their first encounter with the dead miko after the conception of their child. Each time, he had nearly lost Kagome for good, even though her body was completely healthy.

After spending much of his life in a state of emotional constipation, Inuyasha liked to think that traveling with his friends had granted him a little wisdom on the subject. Emotions were _powerful_ ; they could make you fly, or they could send you spiraling into dark depths of despair. So…what was he doing to Kagome by leaving her to look for Kikyou? At the very least, he was reinforcing her belief that she was second to the dead miko in his eyes. Yes, he had promised to stay with her until their child was grown, but what message did it send if he always put Kikyou’s needs above her own? ‘I’ll stay with you, Kagome, but only when Kikyou doesn’t need me.’ If that was the case, then he might as well send Kagome back to her time and seal the well behind her. If that was the way he was going to treat the mother of his child, then he didn’t deserve to stand in her presence for another second.

Inuyasha sighed, tilting his head back to gaze up at the beautiful blue sky, nature not caring about his inner turmoil in the slightest. He had never been forced to choose between Kikyou and Kagome before, mostly due to the latter’s generous spirit. But it was time. If he went back to Kagome, he would be abandoning Kikyou, breaking his promises of loyalty and protection as he’d already broken his promise to join her in hell when she desired. But if he went to Kikyou now, how could he ever face Kagome again? How could she believe that his promises to _her_ were anything more than empty words? How could he be the father of her child, if he couldn’t even commit to her?

He knew what the right decision was, but making it was not easy. Kikyou was a special person to him. From his perspective, the old Kikyou had not perished fifty years ago. It seemed that less than a year ago, he’d been by her side, talking hopefully about their future together. Still not quite believing that he’d finally found someone to soothe his loneliness, a woman to join with as husband and wife. He’d been ready to give up anything to make it so. But things had changed. He was no longer willing to sacrifice everything for Kikyou. He would not give up being a father for anything in the world. He would not give up the years he had promised Kagome, not for all the riches under the sun, immortality, or the eternal blessing of all the kami. There was nothing more precious to him than the dream of holding his child in his arms, with its mother by his side.

Still he hesitated, unable to stomach the thought of abandoning Kikyou. But perhaps there was another way, one which seemed obvious but which he had never tried before. If he asked, even begged Kagome and the others to accompany him to look for Kikyou…would they agree? That would at least eliminate the physical danger he placed Kagome in by leaving. And if he explained himself properly, perhaps he could limit the emotional damage as well. Ultimately, Inuyasha saw no other option. He couldn’t abandon Kagome, but he also could _not_ forsake Kikyou. If Kagome and the others refused his request, then he would have a real decision to make. But he would cross that bridge when he came to it. Procrastination sounded like a wonderful solution, so long as they let him get away with it.

The next few minutes passed quickly for Inuyasha, as he sprinted back to Kagome. His steps felt lighter, his heart freer. Despite his need to go to Kikyou, and his concerns that Kagome would refuse, he was glad to be returning to where he belonged. His peace lasted until he spied a speck on the horizon, which quickly materialized into a familiar shape. _Kirara? What’s she doing here?_ Dread settled in the pit of his stomach, as he skidded to a halt at the same time the fire-cat landed before him. She allowed Shippou to hop down before reverting to her kitten form, panting with pained exhaustion.

"Shippou, what—"

"Inuyasha! Kagome and the others were abducted and taken to a castle!"

"What? Shit!" Inuyasha cursed, wasting no time in snatching up Shippou and Kirara and stuffing them into the front of his haori. Kirara obviously wasn’t fully healed, and might not even be able to bear his weight right now. Even if she could, he could probably outpace her on foot due to her condition. The fox kit would likely complain about the bumpy ride, but it beat getting left behind.

The next ten minutes of Inuyasha’s life were among the longest, most excruciating minutes he’d ever experienced. He pushed himself to the limits, his heart in his throat the whole time. He made it back to the dead village, then tracked Kagome’s scent from there. He had only gone about a kilometer down the road before he spotted them, a small group of soldiers escorting three familiar humans. As relieved as he was, he was also downright pissed. _This_ motley group of soldiers had abducted them? What the hell?! Why hadn’t Sango and Miroku just knocked them around a bit? Probably because they figured they could escape at any time, he realized. But there was danger in that attitude too, since the unexpected could always happen. Ideally, the soldiers could be persuaded to leave them alone without resorting to physical violence. But since Miroku didn’t like to use his kazaana unless absolutely necessary, they hadn’t had a way to bluff their way out of trouble. _Heh, we’ll see about that._

Kagome, perhaps sensing his aura, turned around just as he completed his silent approach. The look on her face was a mixture of shock and relief, but also plenty of hurt. He would work on that later, but first he had to get her out of there. Leaping over the heads of the soldiers at the rear of the group, he landed gracefully next to Kagome, scooped her up bridal style, and launched both of them off to the side. After setting her down quickly but gently a half dozen meters away, he leapt back in to retrieve Miroku and Sango. Before the confused and startled soldiers could react effectively, he had all three of their prisoners safely away. He sliced the ropes binding them, then told them to retreat even further off the road. The soldiers had gone into attack formation, weapons raised, though they waited for their leader’s command.

"Don’t hurt them, Inuyasha," Kagome called over her shoulder as she moved away. Inuyasha shook his head and grinned. _Typical Kagome._ He really didn’t have any intention of harming these pitiful humans, though. If necessary, he would rough the leader up a bit, and the rest of them would flee easily enough.

"Who dares to defy the Okugata-sama?!" the leader demanded, all bluster and righteous indignation. "A youkai?" he observed incredulously. "You will come with us peacefully, foul creature, or we shall give you the end that you deserve."

Inuyasha smirked, but managed to refrain from laughing, knowing that would only make things worse. Still, this was pretty amusing. He had dealt with the likes of this idiot before. The leader could be so brave because he didn’t have to go fight the youkai himself; he could order his men to do it for him. The soldiers under his command certainly didn’t look too excited to be facing a youkai. _Good. This’ll be easier than I thought._

"I’ll pass," he remarked casually, drawing Tetsusaiga but leaving it in its rustic state for the moment.

"Ha!" the leader barked haughtily. "You mean to challenge us with that dull s—wah!"

The reason for the abrupt end of his sentence was Tetsusaiga’s transformation, which had the awing effect Inuyasha was looking for. The soldiers took a couple involuntary steps back, drawing their leader’s ire.

"Hold your ground, cowards, or I’ll have you all whipped!" he snarled, though Inuyasha could detect a fair amount of fear in his voice. "Stand firm and do your duty!"

"Duty, eh?" Inuyasha repeated, holding his pose for a few moments to meet each of their gazes in turn. Then he suddenly spun to the side and smashed Tetsusaiga into the ground, summoning the Kaze no Kizu. Now _there_ was a nice bluff; a large swath of earth was rapidly and spectacularly decimated by Tetsusaiga’s youki. He would never use the Kaze no Kizu against humans, of course, and in fact he wasn’t sure his sword would allow it in the first place. But they didn’t need to know that. And as he turned back to face them, casually leaning his blade against his shoulder, he could see that each man was pondering what would happen if that incredibly powerful attack was directed at him. The leader’s chin quivered, his lips moving soundlessly.

"Unless your duty is to die, I suggest you get the fuck out of here," Inuyasha stated, adding a little menace to his tone as he glared directly at the leader. "And if you’re going to order your men to die, then you’d better be prepared yourself." Inuyasha could see when his message sank in. _That’s right, you stuck-up bastard. I’m coming for you first._ Finally, the leader found his voice.

"W-well…p-perhaps I will let you and your companions go with a warning. Leave these lands, and do not return."

Without waiting for a response, he spun his horse around and trotted off with as much dignity as he could manage. His relieved soldiers hurried to catch up, laying their former prisoners’ weapons and Kagome’s bag on the grass. Some even muttered apologies for the ‘misunderstanding’ as they passed. Inuyasha watched them go, then sheathed Tetsusaiga. He heard his friends approaching, and swallowed in sudden nervousness. Scaring the soldiers away had been easy. Now came the hard part.

Miroku cleared his throat. "Well, Inuyasha, I must confess that I am surprised to see again you so soon. I did not think that Shippou and Kirara would be able to catch up to you so quickly to warn of you our predicament."

"We didn’t," Shippou stated in amazement, as if just now realizing the significance of the direction the hanyou had been traveling in when they met. "He was already on his way back."

A chorus of gasps rang out behind Inuyasha, but one in particular caught his attention. His nerves intensified, his heart racing now as sweat pooled on his brow. His mouth was suddenly dry, but he licked his lips and found the courage to speak.

"I…never should have left."

The shift in her scent had him spinning around to face her. She gazed at him, a mixture of hope and apprehension shining in her eyes. It was clear that she didn’t want to misunderstand him, to get her hopes up only to have them dashed when she discovered that he didn’t really mean what she thought. He was pretty sure he knew what she truly wanted to hear, but he couldn’t give her that. Just as he couldn’t promise to stay by her side until death did them part. He could, however, speak from the heart and open up to her in a way he never had before. He prayed that would be enough.

"I don’t want to leave you guys," he said, addressing everyone but looking only at Kagome. "But I can’t abandon Kikyou. I need to know for sure whether she’s alive or not. Otherwise, I won’t be able to move forward. Please…come with me. Help me look for her."

Kagome gazed at him, not sure how to feel. On the one hand, he had come back. He had returned of his own volition, and surely not solely because he feared that he had left her in danger. She could see it in his face; he was concerned for her emotional well-being as well. He never wanted to hurt her, in any way, but that had not stopped him from going to see Kikyou in the past. Whether because of her pregnancy or the closeness they had shared, it was apparently enough to stop him now.

All of that was fine, but Kagome wasn’t jumping for joy. Inuyasha still didn’t want to choose between her and Kikyou. He was practically begging her _not_ to make him choose, to let him keep her by his side while giving her preincarnation priority. What would he do if she refused to go with him? Would he go anyway? Perhaps he didn’t even know. Kagome felt all eyes on her, their other friends prepared to defer to her judgment. So what did she do? Was this the day she finally put her foot down with Inuyasha? Was this the day she made him choose between herself and Kikyou?

His words came back to her. _I need to know for sure whether she’s alive or not. Otherwise, I won’t be able to move forward._ She had to struggle not to read too much into those words. The most optimistic side of her translated that as a statement that he would be free to love her as a woman and become her husband if Kikyou was really gone. And that it would be what he truly desired. But she knew that was foolishness on her part. Inuyasha was no more ready to become her husband than he was to forget about Kikyou. Maybe those things she dreamed of really would happen someday if Kikyou was no longer in the picture, but only if she was _really gone._ Was it not natural for Inuyasha to want to know for sure, to feel driven to follow leads and rumors of her whereabouts?

Ultimately, Kagome decided that she wasn’t ready to give him an ultimatum. She wasn’t ready for the look of hurt and betrayal in his eyes, to see how crushed he would be when she ceased to act as the understanding and forgiving girl who had become his best friend. And she wasn’t prepared to have her heart broken when he chose Kikyou anyway. Even if he was still putting Kikyou ahead of her, even if this was just a slightly different version of the status quo, she couldn’t do that to him. She loved him too much for that. They had grown closer because she had never forced him to choose, and now did not strike her as the time to start. Besides, she too wanted to know for sure whether Kikyou had passed on or not, whether Inuyasha was free to ‘move forward.’

His relief at her small nod was a palpable thing, and Kagome immediately knew that she had made the right decision. Her relationship with Inuyasha had never been characterized by dramatic twists and turns, though there had certainly been a few of those along the way. It was a slowly-evolving phenomenon which had taken plenty of trials and much heartache to reach this point. By putting her own desires aside, she gave the gradual evolution a chance to continue. Agreeing to this didn’t make her happy—in fact it was pretty depressing—but it was yet another step in the right direction. At least he had asked her to come with him to a potential encounter with Kikyou, rather than leaving her behind. Given the choice, she would much prefer to be by his side, even if she had to witness another tender moment between the two of them. In that case, she could trust Inuyasha to be considerate of her feelings…hopefully.

Inuyasha was indeed pleased at Kagome’s acceptance of his proposal. For a few heartbeats he had honestly thought she would refuse. But he too understood that while Kagome had acquiesced to his request, she was not happy about it. He vowed to do his best to make this as painless for her as possible, especially if they did happen to find Kikyou. But there was one little problem with this arrangement, he realized as soon as he started to consider the mechanics of actually traveling to Kikyou’s supposed location. Namely, Kirara wasn’t fully healed. She certainly wasn’t up to carrying Miroku and Sango, and Shippou couldn’t be trusted to bear such a burden in his balloon form over long distances. Inuyasha didn’t think they would be especially keen on crowding onto his back again either. No, that had only flown because they’d been unconscious at the time. So that meant either leaving them behind or delaying his search for Kikyou, neither of which he wanted to do. The wandering monk had said that the miko was wounded. Kirara would probably feel better by morning, but who knew if Kikyou would last that long? But on the other hand, how could he tell Miroku and Sango that their lives weren’t important enough for him to protect? Inuyasha was suddenly and utterly stumped as to what to do.

Unbeknownst to him, said pair of humans shared an exasperated but amused look at their friend’s consternation. Inuyasha meant well, but he was such a dolt sometimes. They weren’t happy with his continued ‘two-timing,’ but asking Kagome to go with him was a definite improvement over what usually happened. He was showing his growing concern for her feelings, in his own asinine way. And they would respect Kagome’s wishes on the matter. So they would let him off the proverbial hook. Besides, some time alone might do the hanyou and miko some good, especially if the rumor of Kikyou turned out to be false. Inuyasha had been fairly closed off since Kikyou’s apparent demise at Mount Hakurei, but perhaps Kagome could break down some of his walls if given the opportunity.

"Go ahead, you two," Miroku told them with a smile devoid of lechery. "Don’t worry about us."

"You sure?" Inuyasha demanded excitedly, like a child might after hearing the words he desperately wants to hear.

"We can take care of ourselves, Inuyasha," Sango told him firmly, slightly annoyed that he thought they needed his protection. "We’ve been doing it our whole lives."

"Indeed. And besides," Miroku added with an amorous grin, looping his arm around Sango’s shoulders. "Sango and I will enjoy a very pleasant evening by ourselves."

Despite her melancholy, Kagome had to giggle at the look of absolute panic on her friend’s face. _Oh, Sango-chan, did you just now realize that sending me off with Inuyasha leaves_ you _alone with Miroku-sama?_ Apparently so, and the taijiya was not pleased with the revelation. She flushed a dark shade of pink and broke free of Miroku’s embrace, her eyes darting to and fro as she tried to come up with a way out of this. Salvation came in the form of throat being cleared, and all eyes turned to the pouting kitsune sitting with his arms folded next to Kirara. Neither looked especially pleased that both pairs of adults had made plans to be alone, forgetting all about their diminutive companions.

"Shippou and Kirara can stay with us!" Sango declared hastily, as if afraid that someone else would call ‘dibs’ first. Miroku had the grace to look crestfallen, but in truth he couldn’t have been surprised. Kagome did wonder just who Sango felt so strongly that she couldn’t trust…the lecherous monk, or herself?

With the arrangements finalized, the Inu-gang settled a few minor details before splitting up. Miroku and Sango agreed to make camp away from the road so as to avoid detection by any other soldiers which might come marching past. They also promised to meet Inuyasha and Kagome at the village where Kikyou was supposedly holed up. Sango was confident that Kirara would feel better by morning, and if not, they would walk. Inuyasha didn’t protest this potential delay in their quest for the sole reason that it would allow Kagome to sleep in if she needed to, which was exactly why Sango had proposed it in the first place. Finally, the miko left her bag with the taijiya, not wishing to have it with her while riding Inuyasha at top speed—that would be no fun for her back and shoulders. It was not as though she would need her supplies for the night, after all. If they did find Kikyou, she doubted she’d be able to sleep in the other miko’s presence. And if not, they’d probably return to the others.

Those items resolved, the only remaining question was the mode of Kagome’s transportation. There was only one option, obviously, but Inuyasha still looked fairly nervous as he knelt down in front of her. But if Kagome wasn’t going to refuse to actually _go_ with him to look for Kikyou, she certainly couldn’t take issue with riding on his back. The pleading look in his eyes also helped to convince her, and as she settled against him, his hands returning to their customary position holding her lower thighs, she realized that this wasn’t going to be as awkward as she feared. He told her to let him know if the ride was too bumpy, and they were off. It _was_ a little bumpy, since he was running as fast as he could, but Kagome could handle it so she didn’t complain. It was honestly nice to be here with him, nestled against his back with the wind whipping through her hair. She only hoped that the more pleasant aspects of spending time with Inuyasha didn’t go straight to hell once they arrived at their destination.

Kagome’s nervousness increased the closer they came to the village in question, but in reality there was nothing to worry about. There was no sign of Kikyou, and none of the villagers had seen a miko. Some of them recalled speaking to the wandering monk, but none reported hearing of a miko from his lips or otherwise. _What’s going on?_ Kagome wondered as she watched Inuyasha sadly. He stood on the bank of the river, gazing across the gently flowing waters with an unreadable expression. Her shoulders slumped, her already dismal spirits sinking even further. Somehow, they had wound up exactly where they were this morning, with no confirmation that Kikyou was either dead or alive. Inuyasha, and their relationship, was still stuck in limbo.

The hanyou noticed her attention and shook himself. He sauntered over to her with some forced spring in his step, clearly trying to seem upbeat for her sake. Kagome wasn’t buying it, but she did appreciate the effort.

"You wanna head back?" he asked, to which the miko nodded. They might as well rejoin the others; there was no reason to stay here. The sun was setting, but the waning light was certainly no issue for Inuyasha. Kagome knelt down and drank a few cupped handfuls of water from the river. Thirst quenched, she stood and turned to her companion, expecting to find him kneeling before her. Instead he stood facing away from her, back straight and ears perked at attention. She raised her eyes to follow his gaze and gasped. Against the horizon loomed an undulating mass, growing ever larger. Stretching out her spiritual senses confirmed that the mysterious entity was a swarm of youkai, possibly the same one which had devastated the village they’d come across earlier that day.

"Shit!" Inuyasha cursed, now kneeling down expectantly. He launched them into a full sprint as soon as Kagome was settled, reaching the nearby village in a matter of seconds. Most of the women were inside cooking the evening meal, but some of the men and children were outdoors. One by one they noticed the approaching cloud, though most seemed more concerned about the outsiders in their midst suddenly appearing ready for battle. That would soon change, Inuyasha knew. As soon as their weak human eyes saw the youkai swarm for what it was, a general panic would ensue. Not that it would do them any good.

"Stay here, Kagome," he told her, setting her down and leaping up to the roof of a building directly in the swarm’s path. There he waited, fingering Tetsusaiga’s hilt with a grave expression. That is, until he heard Kagome’s squeak of fright. Looking over in her direction, he barely resisted the urge to roll his eyes. She had attempted to climb up to the roof using a conveniently place cart as a stepping stool, but had only managed to lever one arm over the ledge and now hung helplessly, grunting and flailing her feet.

"What the hell are you doing, wench?" he demanded as he pulled her up, more exasperated than angry. She didn’t respond, instead walking across the rooftop to face the youkai, unshouldering her bow and removing an arrow from her quiver.

"Seriously, Kagome, I can handle this."

"My place is by your side, Inuyasha."

His retort died on his lips. How could he argue with that? And why would he want to? Kagome wanted to be with him, and he would be lying if he said he didn’t appreciate her presence. They had faced down the vaunted Shichinintai together; no amount of small fry youkai would be enough to overcome them. He sidled up next to her, sparing a sideways glance to see her smiling grimly as she sized up their enemy. He felt his lips curl upward to match her expression, the thrill of impending battle running through him. He watched her out of the corner of his eye as an ominous wind picked up, tossing her hair behind her, and dark shadows slowly crept across her face. Still, her smile never wavered. And as the youkai swarm grew large enough to blot out the setting sun, and cries of alarm went up behind them, they drew their weapons.

The resulting clash was as spectacular as it was satisfying, for both of them. Tetsusaiga’s youki and Kagome’s spiritual energy flowed together as before, actually seeming to enhance one another as they tore through the marauding youkai, leaving not a single one alive. There was a moment of silence when the carnage was over. They turned to each other, still grinning. Inuyasha held up his hand, not as a lover or even a brother would, but as one warrior to another. Kagome took it in the same way, her eyes shining with happiness. For whatever problems they might have, whatever lingering issues held them back, when they were together like this it felt like destiny.

The rising sound of cheering broke their mutual captivation, and they pulled apart. Inuyasha was somewhat surprised to find the entire village applauding them from below, but he supposed it was a natural reaction to what they’d just witnessed. Him and Kagome standing there with a gorgeous twilight in the background and pieces of youkai raining down behind them…yeah, they must look pretty badass. The cheering turned into expressions of gratitude when they came down from the roof. The ‘Miko-sama’ got most of the credit, but Inuyasha was used to that so he didn’t let it get to him. Kagome was so overwhelmed that she didn’t seem to notice. Finally, the village headman quieted the crowd, formally thanked the saviors, and begged them to name a reward for their great service.

"You still wanna go back?" Inuyasha asked quietly, so only Kagome would hear.

"We can’t," Kagome replied in a whisper. "They’re scared to death, and all those carcasses might attract more youkai. Maybe Miroku-sama can put up some sutras in the morning so they’re not completely defenseless."

Inuyasha nodded, accepting her decision. Truth be told, he had no objection to staying the night. Maybe Kagome would sleep better indoors. This was a poor village and didn’t seem to have an inn, but surely they didn’t have to feel guilty about accepting a meal and a place to sleep for the night. Speaking of guilt, he still hadn’t forgotten what his foolishness had put Kagome through earlier. Perhaps there was a way to make it up to her…

The villagers were only too happy to oblige; a meal and a couple beds seemed a small price to pay for their lives. Struck by sudden inspiration, however, Inuyasha drew the headman aside and spoke to him quietly.

"Anybody in this town own a bathtub?"

* * *

"Mmmm," Kagome groaned as she sank into the steaming water, immediately immersing herself up to her shoulders. A five-star spa treatment could never feel as good as the simple pleasure of a hot bath after a couple hard days on the road. The evening had passed by in a blur so far, but she fully intended to savor every moment of this divine submersion.

Inuyasha’s attitude had suddenly taken on an air of smugness soon after he spoke to the headman, but she hadn’t learned why until later. That’s because the sneak had asked the headman to keep the bath preparations quiet, intending to surprise her. Well, mission accomplished. There had been plenty of distractions to keep her from finding out, first among them Inuyasha’s own odd behavior. When the sleeping arrangements were being discussed, the hanyou had stated in no uncertain terms that he was ‘Miko-sama’s loyal protector,’ and that one room would be sufficient. She had thrown him a confused look at that, but had decided not to question him about it in front of everyone. In the relative privacy of the headman’s hut, eating dinner with him and his family, Inuyasha had been less formal but had still addressed her as ‘Kagome-sama.’ It wasn’t _bad_ to be referred to with such respect, but it was weirding her out coming from him.

Kagome wasn’t as naïve as she used to be. She was pretty sure she knew why Inuyasha was behaving the way he was. Namely, there was prejudice in this time period against nonhumans. He probably wanted the villagers to think they were partners or had something of a master-servant relationship, rather than real friendship. She was sure many of the locals _did_ think that, she being the miko and him being her youkai helper who she in turn kept in line. She was tempted to correct their misunderstanding, but knew that would only cause problems. Inuyasha had dealt with this his whole life, so she resolved to follow his lead. This was also the first time that the two of them were alone in a strange village in a long while. In the beginning, they hadn’t stopped at many villages. And even when they did, they hadn’t liked each other very much. No one who saw them back then would assume they were anything more than reluctant allies, but that wasn’t the case anymore.

So she hadn’t said anything, and had promptly forgotten all about her concerns when Inuyasha went outside and returned with an announcement that her bath water was almost ready. She had been hard-pressed not to hug him then and there, but managed to restrain herself. She did feel a little guilty, since heating that quantity of water took a significant amount of effort and firewood. But the headman brushed off her concerns, and stated that he was glad to surrender his home for the night so she and her companion could have a well-deserved rest. His was the only home with a bathtub; most of the villagers just washed in the river. The one with the cold water in it. Kagome shivered just thinking about it, and sank further into her bath.

When she emerged an untold number of minutes later, completely refreshed, she found Inuyasha sitting near the cook fire. She giggled a bit at his matted hair and the dampness of his robes, amused that he had chosen to jump in the river—likely with all of his clothes on—instead of taking a bath himself. The sound of her voice drew his attention, but his easy grin vanished as soon as he laid eyes on her. His jaw dropped slightly, his gaze becoming somewhat mesmerized as it panned down her body. A delightful shiver passed along Kagome’s spine at his perusal, and she looked down at herself to try to see what was captivating him so.

It was just a sleeping yukata, borrowed from the headman’s wife. The garment flowed down to her ankles and revealed very little skin, and she had dried herself thoroughly so the cloth wouldn’t get damp and cling to her. The obi hugged her slightly-expanded waist and drew a nice hourglass figure, but wasn’t nearly as form-fitting as Sango’s taijiya armour, for example. Her appearance didn’t seem very special to her, and Kagome hadn’t expected Inuyasha to react at all. Oh, but he was most definitely reacting, and not in a bad way. There was a small but tantalizing amount of heat in his gaze, which caused Kagome’s heartbeat to thunder in her chest. Perhaps he heard it, because in the next moment his eyes panned up to hers, a dark blush staining his cheeks before he tore his gaze away in favor of staring at the floorboards.

Once she had composed herself, Kagome walked over and sat next to him. She smiled softly at his intense embarrassment, finding it endearing. Honestly, it wasn’t as though he’d been ogling her naked. He just liked how she looked in the yukata. She would have to file that little tidbit of information away for the future. _Maybe he has a thing for traditional clothes…except miko robes, of course,_ she thought with a grimace. She didn’t want to let a reminder of the Kikyou crisis ruin her good mood, but it was difficult. Perhaps sensing the shift in her spirits, Inuyasha cleared his throat and spoke up.

"Did you, uh, like your bath?"

"Oh…yes, it was wonderful. Thank you."

"Keh. The locals did all the work."

"Yes, but I know it was your idea."

He didn’t deny it. "Well…you deserved it, Kagome," he stated with all seriousness.

"Kagome?" she repeated, his statement having reminded her of his earlier behavior. Now that they were alone, he was acting like his old self again. She thought she understood his reasoning for the more formal façade in front of the villagers, but wanted to hear it from him to make sure.

He signed, ears drooping. "I just…didn’t want anyone getting the wrong idea, Kagome. People are funny…gratitude can turn to angry mob in a hurry." _If they think you’re fucking a half-breed_ , he added in his head.

Kagome nodded, having expected as much. The prejudice of this time period irritated the hell out of her, but there was little she could do about it except show Inuyasha on a daily basis that _she_ wasn’t like that, that she loved him for who and what he was. And she knew that he appreciated, perhaps even cherished her acceptance and support. But a small part of her couldn’t help but wonder if he didn’t have an ulterior motive. Perhaps part of the reason that he didn’t want the villagers to think they were together was because he didn’t want them to _be_ together. Now…or ever. She knew she was overthinking things, but still that small element of doubt refused to go away. When Inuyasha spoke again, she quickly buried it with all of her other insecurities.

"Sorry…for leaving earlier. I’m sure you didn’t feel like getting kidnapped today."

"It’s all right, Inuyasha," she assured him automatically. "You came back. That…" she trailed off, swallowing the sudden lump in her throat. "T-that’s what counts."

He looked like he wanted to believe her, that everything was fine between them. Hell, she wanted to believe it herself. But both secretly knew that they were kidding themselves. They truly were stuck in limbo, unable to move forward. Close, but never close enough. An oppressive, awkward silence set in, but before Kagome could figure out how to break it, her eyes began to droop. Inuyasha urged her to go to bed, and she didn’t protest. She was out cold within ten seconds of lying down on the futon.

The hanyou sighed as he stood, then exited the hut and hopped up to the roof to begin his nightly vigil. He wouldn’t sleep, not when he and Kagome were alone in a strange village, and especially with the heightened threat of youkai attack. Logically, the roof was the best place to spot trouble, but he also knew that he needed to get away from her if he was to act as an effective sentry. Her appearance had proven especially… _distracting_ this evening. Seeing her in that yukata had hit him in a way which transcended physical attraction. Judging by her confused scent, she hadn’t understood the real reason that her choice of garb affected him so, for which he was grateful. It had shaken him to the core, that yukata. She had never looked so much like a _wife_ before.

Inuyasha wasn’t a fool. He knew that if Kagome did someday marry, she would never be the obedient and submissive wife typical to this time period. If he had been lucid at the time, he might’ve reflected that he would never want her to change who she was for anyone. But on a purely visual level, she was the spitting image of a married woman settling down for the night in the feudal era. For a few blissful heartbeats, his imagination had run away with him, showing him something which frightened him because of how strongly he’d yearned for it in that moment.

He’d stumbled through the next few minutes, managing to utter the words of apology he’d been rehearsing for the better part of an hour. Apologizing had done little to assuage his guilt, however. Kagome was still depressed, and he knew why. Unfortunately, there was little he could do about it. He owed a duty to Kikyou, one he had failed miserably to honor. His sadness and self-loathing over allowing Kikyou to die warred inside him with his remorse for stomping all over Kagome’s feelings. At times, he felt like one big pile of misery. His only moment of true happiness since Kikyou’s apparent demise had been earlier this evening, when for so fleeting a moment he had forgotten his worries and basked in victory with Kagome. Then harsh reality had settled back in.

His duty to Kikyou remained in effect. If he heard a credible rumor of her whereabouts, he owed it to her to investigate. And if he happened to find her clinging to life, he would take care of her. Regardless of how Kagome felt. There were measures he could take to lessen the younger miko’s pain, but he could not forsake Kikyou. Perhaps the reason Kagome had agreed to accompany him was because she knew this, and didn’t want to cause a rift between them. For he now knew what he would do if Kagome forced him to choose between herself and her preincarnation. He would choose Kikyou, at least to the extent of his duty to protect and care for her. And he would pray that Kagome found it in her heart to forgive him for it.

He was nevertheless extremely grateful to be here, with her. She had put aside her own feelings in order to remain by his side, as she had been doing since day one. He ardently hoped that they would soon discover unequivocally whether Kikyou had survived her brush with death. Even moving backwards would be preferable to hanging in limbo.

* * *

Kagura yawned as she meandered leisurely across the darkening sky on her feather. It had been a long, boring day. The Okugata’s soldiers had brought in plenty of ‘suspicious outsiders,’ but none of them proved to be the humans Inuyasha traveled with. This surprised Kagura; she had honestly thought that the hanyou would fall for the ruse. Eventually, Naraku’s infant had ordered her to find out what was going on. She started her search at the most logical place—the village where her corpse dance controlled monk had stated that Kikyou would be. Sure enough, both Inuyasha and Kagome were there. Kagura arrived just in time to witness them slaughter a swarm of youkai together in impressive fashion. Needless to say, she’d retreated swiftly before they noticed her, glad for once that her orders did not include engaging in combat. So the hanyou and miko could combine their attacks now? She would file that away in her little cache of information about Naraku’s enemies, alongside her prior knowledge of Inuyasha’s time of weakness. A good minion would report these to her master, of course, but then good minions didn’t wish for their master’s death either.

Eventually, the castle came into view and Kagura sighed, knowing her brief period of freedom was over. But she dared not make the infant wait any longer; the little cretin was more powerful that he looked, she was sure. And Naraku probably trusted him a lot more than he trusted her.

"Well?" the infant demanded as soon as she entered the room where he sat with the possessed Okugata.

Kagura shrugged. "Inuyasha followed the lead about Kikyou, but he took Kagome with him."

"What?" Naraku’s offspring growled in annoyance. "Did the others go with them too?" Kagura shook her head, and the infant turned contemplative.

"So they are staying at the village for the night?" he asked.

"Seemed that way."

"Good. Pick me up."

"Why? We leaving?"

"Just shut up and do as I say."

Kagura rolled her eyes inwardly. _Just like Naraku, this one._ And yet, he maintained that he wasn’t Naraku’s offspring. _Too bad he looks like Naraku pleasured himself and left his fluids congealing in a corner._ She wisely kept that observation to herself.

On the bright side, it didn’t look like the remainder of the evening would be boring.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I don’t think Akago is actually the infant’s name; I read that it’s just a Japanese word for ‘infant’ which other characters use to address him (not knowing his real name). So I probably won’t refer to him in text as ‘Akago’ going forward.


	23. Darkness in the Heart

They came in the wee hours of the morning. Two swarms of youkai from the north and west, each almost twice as large as the one they had destroyed the day before. Inuyasha sensed their combined youki brushing against his aura a few seconds before spotting them against the sky, illuminated by the dim light of the moon and stars. And immediately, he knew that this was not going to be nearly as easy as the previous battle.

Kagome was already stirring when he stormed into the room, perhaps sensing the approaching youkai as well. But his urgent words immediately roused her to a full state of wakefulness. Next he dashed over to the hut where the village headman was currently staying, woke him and informed him of the situation. His orders were firm and succinct; the headman was to wake the village, gather his people together, and lead them away from the approaching swarms to the southeast. If the humans were huddled into one large group, they would be much easier to defend. Inuyasha knew that he and Kagome would never be able to save everyone if they remained spread out as they were now. The flimsy wood of the huts would serve as little protection against ravenous youkai.

He was rushing back over to the headman’s home when Kagome emerged, having changed into her school uniform in record time. Inuyasha nodded in approval at her choice of garb; the uniform was not much in the way of armour, but it did provide much more freedom of movement than the yukata. And the lack of armour was something he could remedy. Kagome looked like she wanted to protest as he tossed her his fire-rat haori, but on this he would not budge. She was carrying his child, and she was damn well going to wear his haori. End of discussion. Grimacing as she realized how stubborn he was going to be, Kagome slipped the garment over her shoulders, sliding her arms though the slits and tying the voluminous sleeves around her torso as she had done in the past. That done, she favored him with a ‘happy now?’ look that didn’t quite reach her eyes, which reflected gratitude.

Inuyasha stepped in close, grabbing her hand and holding it up between their chests. Kagome’s eyes widened as he stared down at her, her lips parting slightly as if expecting him to kiss her. As pleasant as that would be, it hadn’t honestly been Inuyasha’s goal and he wasn’t prepared to simply ‘dive in.’ He would require some time to gather the necessary courage for such a drastic action, even in this charged situation. Really, he had just wanted to get a very important message across to her, so he went with that approach instead.

"Stay close to me, Kagome," he told her gravely. "Don’t leave my side for _any_ reason."

Kagome seemed surprised to hear such a demand, but nodded in agreement. She was intelligent, and probably understood the reason for his concern. It would be hard to look at the false rumor of Kikyou, the soldiers which had abducted his friends, and now _this_ attack and not suspect something. In Inuyasha’s experience, low-level youkai didn’t make coordinated attacks like this. The other one might’ve been a random occurrence, but this seemed like anything but. Some higher power was pulling the strings, and it didn’t take a genius to figure out the prime candidate for such a role. _Naraku…he’s always had it out for Kagome. If I had gone to look for Kikyou alone, what would have happened to her?_ He did not plan on finding out. He did, however, vow to make the bastard answer for so sadistically toying with their emotions.

By this time, the village was a hive of activity. All the panicked little bees were buzzing about in the common areas, each doing his own thing. The headman was shouting for attention, but he was not a young man and lacked the vocal fortitude to make his voice heard over the crowd. This was not a shortcoming which Inuyasha shared.

"SHUT UP!!!" he bellowed at the top of his lungs, drawing out each word for effect. The clamoring of the frightened humans quickly dwindled into silence. "Follow him!" he ordered next, pointing a clawed finger at the headman. "And be _quiet_ about it!"

Satisfied that things were under control, or at least as much as possible in this situation, Inuyasha turned back to Kagome, only to find her grinning playfully and pretending to clean out her ears.

"You shut up too, wench," he told her, though his tone was one of amusement. She could tease him for having a big mouth all she wanted, so long as she _listened_ to the words which came from it. Besides, it wasn’t like _she_ didn’t have a big mouth too, though he wisely kept that thought to himself.

All of this had taken about a minute, from the instant Inuyasha first sensed the youkai. During that time, the swarms had closed the distance significantly. But the crowd of villagers was now moving beyond the outskirts of the settlement and into an open field, an excellent position for him and Kagome to mount a defense with their ranged attacks. With any luck, the town could be spared as well, but that was definitely a secondary concern.

Together, the two fighters ran after the fleeing humans, bringing up the rear of the group. Inuyasha repeatedly glanced behind them, trying to anticipate the perfect moment to turn and engage the ever-gaining swarms. Finally, as the youkai converged over the village, becoming one super-swarm rather than two distinct masses, the hanyou grabbed Kagome’s hand and gently pulled her to a halt. She immediately turned and drew an arrow, knowing as well as her partner that the crucial moment had arrived. If they could take out enough of the youkai with their first volley, mopping up the rest would be a relatively simple task. And no humans would have to die tonight.

Kagome was just charging an arrow with spiritual energy when everything went completely wrong. The approaching youkai suddenly changed direction, splitting apart in a giant spherical shape and forming what looked to the future-born miko like a massive, writhing dome. They spread out in all directions, traveling along great sloping trajectories which would eventually carry them to merge once more at a point which would intercept fleeing villagers. Cursing under her breath, Kagome fired an arrow into the rapidly expanding swarm anyway. Inuyasha did likewise with a Kaze no Kizu, but the attacks were not well coordinated and only took out a fraction of the dispersed youkai. Both were readying another attack when a fresh round of terrified screams rang out behind them.

If there had been any doubt in their minds that this was no random youkai attack, it was immediately dispelled. No less than four of Naraku’s puppets now loomed before the crowd. One of them lashed out with a tentacle and decapitated several villagers, killing them instantly. After that, all hell broke loose. Humans fled in all directions, though some remained frozen where they stood, overwhelmed by fear. Still others sat on the ground and cried uncontrollably. The pitiful sight set our hanyou and miko’s blood to boiling. It was obvious that Naraku had orchestrated this whole charade just to get to them. These poor people were nothing but collateral damage.

One of the puppets moved to snatch up some of the villagers, but never got the chance. A purifying arrow caught it in the chest, reducing it to dust in a fraction of a second. Inuyasha hoisted Kagome onto his back and told her to keep shooting, trying to keep her steady as he ran. The miko was glad to oblige, destroying two of the remaining puppets and wounding the last one. It collapsed to the ground, a large chunk removed from its side, but did not dissolve. Still, Inuyasha thought three out of four was a pretty impressive display of archery, especially from hanyou-back. Unfortunately, they had no time to either revel in Kagome’s success or finish off the last puppet. Seeing that the hanyou and miko were distracted, the youkai swarm had moved in.

Barrage after barrage of purifying arrows and Kaze no Kizu did much to thin the enemy’s numbers, but there were too many, and the villagers were now somewhat scattered. The scent of fresh blood filled the air, along with the choking screams of those unlucky enough to be caught by a youkai’s jaws. Those villagers who still had their wits about them began to gather at the only place on the battlefield which actually seemed somewhat safe—Kagome. She fought like a woman possessed, her skin maintaining a light pink glow due to the constant flow of spiritual energy she was using. Each of her arrows vaporized dozens of youkai, carving great swaths through the enemy ranks. Inuyasha did what he could to keep the youkai away from her, and was successful for the most part. On the single occasion one did manage to sneak past him, she calmly whacked it away with a great swing of her bow. The hanyou wished he could have paused for a few moments to admire her, but had to content himself with stolen glances between his own grisly work. He and Tetsusaiga were not idle, slaying as many youkai as the miko. Through it all, he stayed close to Kagome, giving her enough space to fight but remaining near in case of an unexpected emergency.

Gradually the great swarm of youkai began to disperse. So many had been slain, while others were busy feeding on the flesh of the fallen, human and youkai alike. Still others could be seen soaring away into the night, having seen quite enough of the ridiculously powerful miko and hanyou. Not even Naraku’s influence could keep them in the fight any longer. Things were actually starting to look up for our heroes, but both knew better than to count their blessings too soon. Sure enough, from across the battlefield came the frightened cries of children. Inuyasha and Kagome didn’t know it, but the two boys in question had hidden under the carcass of a youkai. That is, until Naraku’s final puppet recovered from its partial purification and lurched upright. The boys had panicked at the sight and made a mad dash for the relative safety of the group of villagers huddled near Kagome, only to be snatched by one of the puppet’s tentacles and hoisted high into the air. Hence the screaming.

Reacting quickly, Kagome fired another arrow at the puppet and this time hit the target cleanly. The entire body was almost instantaneously purified, from the masked face to the tips of the tentacles. This presented another problem, however, namely the two young lads now freefalling from over ten meters in the air. From such a height, death would be the most likely result of an impact with the hard earth below. For a split-second, Inuyasha debated whether to attempt a rescue. He was clearly the only one who stood a chance of saving them, but to do so would take him further away from Kagome than he was comfortable with under the circumstances.

"Inuyasha!"

Her insistent cry sealed it for him, as he launched himself into a dead sprint, sheathing Tetsusaiga as he went. He skidded to a halt and caught the boys with very little room to spare, then dispatched the few rogue youkai which had honed in on the two falling morsels. When he turned to make his way back to Kagome’s side, his heart froze in his chest. A familiar figure was dropping in on her from above, with obvious ill intent. It was Kagura, whose presence neither of them had felt with all of the youki and scents polluting the area. Kagome sensed her approach and fired an arrow, but the wind sorceress looked like she had been expecting this and sent the projectile veering off course with a great sweep of her fan. The resulting wind also served to knock Kagome off balance, and by the time she recovered, Kagura had already landed right next to her. The wind sorceress struck the miko only once, a sharp blow to the temple with her closed fan, which was apparently a lot sturdier than it looked. Kagome went limp and dropped to the ground like a rag doll, all traces of spiritual energy suddenly vanishing from her form. In the best case, she was out cold. In the worst…

"KAGOME!!!" Inuyasha bellowed, once again displaying the tremendous capacity of his lungs. But the miko was dead to the world, and as Kagura hoisted her limp form in one arm, she passed the hanyou an almost apologetic look, as if to say ‘sorry, just following orders.’ Then she was airborne, soaring away on her feather with Kagome as unwilling cargo. An enraged snarl tore from Inuyasha’s throat as he charged after them, willing his legs to pump faster than they were actually capable. He might not be able to catch Kagura on foot, but he could at least stay close. Kagome would not be alone in the enemy’s clutches for long.

There was just one problem with this plan—the remaining youkai, seeing his departure, were closing in on the surviving villagers. His sensitive ears caught their dismayed shouts and pleas for assistance, and his heart clenched. It was an excruciating dilemma, but he knew what the right thing to do was. And what’s more, he knew what Kagome would want him to do.

"Fuck!"

He made short work of the youkai, but dashing back to the battlefield and fighting cost him precious, precious time. Kagura now had at least a minute’s head start on him. He could just barely see her if he squinted, silhouetted against the night sky. But that would not last for long; the gap between them was steadily widening, since she could fly faster than he could run. He thought he could follow the faint scent on the breeze, but even so, his good deed had bought Naraku more time alone with Kagome once his minion arrived at her destination. Inuyasha’s stride faltered as he imagined what might happen to Kagome, but he chased those thoughts away. His miko was tough; she could survive a few minutes without him, even against Naraku. _I’m coming, Kagome. Wait for me!_

* * *

Kagome woke with a start, roused by the disturbing sensation of some outside force rooting around inside her chest. Not physically, but proverbially; her emotional heart was being scanned. It was an intensely creepy feeling, and she struggled to resist. But her attempts to drive the invader back out of her body proved futile.

"Kukuku, so you’ve regained consciousness, eh?"

It was not Naraku’s voice, Kagome was shocked to discover. It was much too high-pitched to belong to the dark hanyou, though it carried the same sadistic cruelty. Her first thought was to summon her spiritual energy, but she found that she could not reach down deep within herself to draw upon the source of her power, as she always did. A foreign energy surrounded her, pressing against her mental defenses, but was thus far unable to penetrate them. Still, the nauseating perusal of her heart continued.

"Where is it?" the voice asked, sounding confused and mildly concerned. "Where is the darkness?"

Kagome felt the strange power recede slightly, and managed to open her eyes. The first thing she glimpsed was Kagura standing over her. _That’s right…I was fighting alongside Inuyasha, then Kagura attacked me. She must have knocked me out._ The throbbing pain in her temple would support such an assumption. _Inuyasha! Where is he? What happened to him?_

"Inuyasha won’t be coming. He is dead."

Kagome gasped, the shock of hearing such a statement causing her to lose her concentration for a moment. But she recovered in time to prevent the evil energy from gaining too much ground. Could Inuyasha really be…dead? Her heart rebelled at the thought, her strong faith in her hanyou filling her with conviction.

"I don’t…I don’t believe you!" she declared. "He’s coming to save me!"

For a moment she thought she was going to win, to defeat this depraved infant currently nestled against her chest. But he redoubled his efforts, and managed to maintain his hold over her. Her arms remained immobile, unable to fling Naraku’s latest incarnation away and end her torment.

"Kukuku, you are a stubborn one, aren’t you? Very well, then. You are correct; Inuyasha is indeed alive. He is probably on his way to rescue you at this very moment. But you and I have plenty of time before he arrives. Every human holds darkness in their hearts, and soon I will find yours."

Kagome grimaced as the examination of her inner being intensified. _Darkness? Do I have darkness in my heart?_ She willed the answer to be in the negative. But she had a sinking feeling that her heart was not as free of sadness and despair as she would like it to be. _"I can’t abandon Kikyou. I need to know for sure whether she’s alive or not. Otherwise, I won’t be able to move forward."_

"Found it," the infant declared smugly, just before all the air whooshed out of Kagome’s lungs. She struggled to breathe, suffocated by the invisible hand which had reached down deep inside her and latched onto something, something she tried to keep hidden. Finally she was able to inhale, but the pressure on her mind almost overpowered her. It took all of her strength to maintain her awareness of self, her will to resist.

"Why do you fight me, girl? I’ve grasped the darkness in your heart; there is no escape. Surrender to me, and I will end your suffering."

Kagome was sorely tempted to accept that offer and fall into oblivion. She was tired, so very tired. Of having her heart broken, of watching Inuyasha leave to go to Kikyou, of constantly feeling like she was second best.

"That’s it, Kagome. Just let go. Inuyasha has chosen Kikyou over you; you owe him nothing. It is okay to bear a grudge against Inuyasha, to hate Kikyou, even to take joy in her death. I know you hold all of those things in your heart, and you have every right. Embrace them, and fill your heart with hatred."

His words were so comforting, so seductive. No one had ever assured her so convincingly that her darkest, most shameful emotions were acceptable, even right. _I bear a grudge against Inuyasha? I hate Kikyou?_ She did, on both counts. Deep down, with those terrible feelings that she tried to keep buried. But she knew that she had honestly wished for Kikyou’s death before. Her words to Kouga came back to her. _"You actually had Inuyasha’s life in your hands, and you chose to save him. I like to believe that if I ever have Kikyou’s life in my hands, I’ll do the same. I hope I can be as strong as you, if I ever face the same temptation."_

That was a strange contradiction—she could hate Kikyou and actively wish for her death, while at the same time hoping that she could find the strength of character to save her if the opportunity ever arose. What the hell kind of twisted morality was that? It made no sense, and yet, that was how she felt. The realization actually buoyed her spirits. She was _not_ a terrible person simply for wishing that Kikyou was gone. Those thoughts were not who she was, and she would never let them define her. Most of all, she wanted Inuyasha to be happy. In that moment, she focused on her beloved hanyou, letting her feelings for him flow through her being. And slowly, the darkness began to recede.

"You’re wrong," she ground out, the power of her voice growing with every syllable. "Those feelings…those are feelings anyone would have. The main thing is…I love Inuyasha!"

"And he will never love you back!"

The infant’s desperately uttered words shot straight to her heart, preventing her from driving him out completely. Seeing his chance, he immediately went on the offensive again.

"You want to make him choose, don’t you, Kagome? Just yesterday, you almost refused his request. But in the end, you didn’t dare. Because you know who he’ll choose if you force him to decide between you and Kikyou."

She did know, she reflected sadly. It was one of the primary reasons why she had agreed to accompany him to search for Kikyou. For her, it had never been a decision of whether or not to give Inuyasha an ultimatum. The only possible options were to remain by his side despite his overriding commitment to the dead miko…or to leave and never return. As long as there was a possibility that Kikyou was alive, Inuyasha would always choose her.

"That’s right, Kagome," the infant soothed, reading her thoughts. "Even if Kikyou is dead, she will always be first in his heart. And what if I were to tell you that Kikyou is indeed alive?"

"How…do you know?" Kagome asked weakly, her voice trembling.

"Because I am smarter than Naraku. Only a fool would believe that one such as Kikyou would perish from falling into miasma. She is out there, somewhere. And as a result, Inuyasha will never stop looking for her."

Kagome imagined what it would be like, to be stuck in her emotional limbo for months or even years, only to go back to square one when Inuyasha finally did find Kikyou again. It reminded her of a dark truth which she preferred not to think about, but which Inuyasha himself had laid out so clearly for her in the midst of a tender moment. _"Kikyou…will have to wait. If she hasn’t found peace and released me by the time our child is an adult, then I’ll go with her. But not before."_ In other words, no matter what transpired between her and Inuyasha, even if their love flourished and bloomed like sakura blossoms in springtime, Inuyasha would always give Kikyou priority. All the dead miko had to do was wait for their child to be grown, then demand that he accompany her to hell. And he would be gone. Kagome had always tried to focus on the positive aspects of Inuyasha’s promise to her, but in this moment, she could think only of the heartbreak which awaited her at the end of their time together.

"Face it, Kagome. Inuyasha is playing you for a fool. If he’d wanted to get rid of Kikyou, he could’ve told her that he seduced you and didn’t want her anymore. But he didn’t do that, did he? Instead, he told Kikyou the truth, that your pregnancy is an accident and that he doesn’t love you in any way."

‘He’s twisting your memories,’ a small voice whispered in her head. ‘None of this is fair to Inuyasha. Don’t forget that he cares for you.’ But the infant smashed these pathetic reassurances down before they could even begin to lift her from the pit of despair she found herself sinking into.

"He does care for you, Kagome, but it will never be the way you hope. He’ll kiss you, but it will never mean anything. He’ll even fuck you if you let him, but he’ll go to Kikyou just the same. You’ll rent his body for a time, but his heart will always belong to her. You’ll raise his child, but in the end, you’ll be nothing more to him than a glorified hole to stick his cock into. And when he leaves, you’ll be used goods, and nobody, not even your brat, will want you anymore. You’ll be all alone in the world, with only yourself to blame. Surrender to me, and I can spare you from that. I’ll give you the peace you deserve."

The seductive power pressed in on her, taking away the heartache, the hurt which she associated with the name ‘Inuyasha.’ But she was not quite ready to give in yet.

"B-but," she choked, in a last-ditch effort to save herself. "I love him." This time, her declaration had no effect whatsoever.

"Yes, but he does not love you. You have always been, and will always be, second best."

She felt her tattered defenses start to give, but no longer possessed the will to fight. It had been taken from her, by Naraku’s infant obviously, but also by the actions of the man she loved. She thought she heard his voice, calling her name from far away, his despairing tone pulling on her heartstrings. But the darkness was too powerful now, and her feeble efforts to reach him proved futile. _I’m sorry, Inuyasha_ , was her final thought before her consciousness faded to black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Ahhh…it’s nice to finally get to a plot twist that you’ve been building up to for twenty chapters. I’m sure you guys can figure out what happened. The ‘darkness in Kagome’s heart’ grew more pervasive due to the events of the story, she and Inuyasha growing closer without him really committing to her. In canon, their relationship had not developed as much, so Kagome could rally around her love for Inuyasha without succumbing to the negative emotions associated with his continued commitment to Kikyou.


	24. In Naraku's Clutches

"But…I love him."

Inuyasha, on the verge of charging to Kagome’s side and rescuing her from her captors, suddenly froze. Kagura and Kanna appeared ready to intervene, but he didn’t care. He’d followed the wind sorceress for a significant distance, eventually losing sight of her but tracking her and Kagome’s scents on the breeze. His nose had eventually carried him to this temple in the mountains, just as the first light of dawn started to break over the eastern horizon. He’d smashed in a wall and burst inside, fangs and claws bared, prepared to take on all comers. That is, until Kagome’s soft utterance reached his ears. She hadn’t named the man lucky enough to be bestowed with her affections, but there was no doubt in Inuyasha’s mind as to his identity.

He’d never dared to ponder how he might react upon hearing her say those words. He’d simply been too torn over whether he thought she felt that way about him, or whether he wanted her to. Before this moment, if he’d had to hazard a guess, he would have imagined that he’d feel a jumbled mix of emotions, some good and some bad. Not this. His lungs were paralyzed in shock, and there were hard lumps of dread in his stomach instead of butterflies. It wasn’t the words themselves which afflicted him so, he reflected when his brain recovered from its momentary skip in time. It was her tone, delivered as though everything else in her world was pain and suffering. As though her love for him was her last ray of hope, and a faint one at that. As though…she had already lost faith completely.

"Yes, but he does not love you. You have always been, and will always be, second best."

The infant in her arms spoke those horrible words, each cruel syllable shoving the knife deeper into Inuyasha’s heart. The little cretin glared smugly at him the whole time, as if trying to twist that figurative blade while simultaneously crushing the tattered remains of Kagome’s resistance. He succeeded on both counts. Kagome’s head slumped forward and she began to collapse onto the floor, still holding the child in her arms. Her normally bright aura dulled, a sinister energy taking hold. The infant smirked in victory, but it wasn’t until he began to turn transparent, his fading form melding into Kagome’s body, that Inuyasha finally found his voice.

"Kagome!" he cried, rushing toward her. Time seemed to slow, his footfalls sounding loudly in his ears as Naraku’s infant continued to disappear before his eyes. A high-pitched cackle rang out as the tiny body vanished completely, leaving Inuyasha’s claws to swipe only empty air. On the verge of panic now, he knelt by Kagome’s side and lifted her up by the shoulders, supporting her head when it lolled backwards. He was aware of Naraku’s other incarnations on an instinctual level only; his focus was entirely on the girl in his arms.

"Kagome, wake up!" he shouted, shaking her as vigorously as he dared. "Come on, wench. Don’t listen to that bastard’s words! Don’t you give up on me!"

She made no response, and Inuyasha gritted his teeth against his despair, blinking his eyes at the sudden burning sensation centered there. He had been in this situation before, on the cusp of losing Kagome. But at least in the previous instances, he’d known exactly what was wrong and how to fix it, whether that meant speaking from the heart or obtaining an antidote for poison. Here, he could only guess at what that vile infant had done to her, and none of his theories were particularly encouraging. Worse, he had no idea what he could to do make her better. _Don’t try anything stupid. You’ve done enough damage already._ Inuyasha shook his head violently, pushing those thoughts aside. He would hate himself for this later, when Kagome was well. Now, he needed answers. He snarled low in his throat, adopting his most feral, menacing glare as he regarded Naraku’s incarnations. Kanna didn’t so much as blink, but Kagura did flinch and step back involuntarily. The wind sorceress had strong instincts of self-preservation, which Inuyasha fully intended to exploit.

"What the _fuck_ did that brat do to her?" he demanded, eyes boring into Kagura’s. She raised her fan and narrowed her eyes, prepared to defend herself. Inuyasha was contemplating the best way to beat a confession out of her when a soft voice caused his head to snap around.

"Inu…yasha?"

He found her gazing up at him with a dazed expression, but his joyous return greeting died in his throat. Something wasn’t right. Her voice was slightly off its usual tenor, which he supposed could be explained by a scratchy throat resulting from her ordeal. But beyond that, there was something wrong with her eyes, which had always been so special to him. They were her normal chocolate orbs, but they lacked their usual depth. Where once there had been so much life, now only emptiness resided. Her eyes were still there, but the soul behind them had vanished.

So lost was Inuyasha in this disturbing mystery, that he didn’t notice Kagome raising her arms until her palms touched his flesh, firmly gripping either side of his head. If anyone else grabbed him like that, he’d pull away almost instantly. But this was _Kagome_ , who could short-circuit his survival instincts like no other. So he remained hopelessly entranced, even as her eyes transformed literally during a blink. Now the true soul inhabiting her body made itself known, as Kagome’s beautiful face became twisted with cruelty. Inuyasha knew the hateful look in her eyes would haunt him for many nights to come. Still, he was powerless to pull away, as her brow furrowed in concentration.

Nothing happened. Inuyasha held his breath, as the malicious smirk on Kagome’s lips shifted into an irritated frown.

"Damn," she cursed after several moments, her words giving Inuyasha the same impression as her eyes. It was her voice, but it was not her speaking.

He was contemplating the significance of this development when his face suddenly exploded in pain. He spun away instinctively, shielding his eyes with an arm. He sensed Kagome scrambling away from him, but made no move to stop her. It was difficult to wrap his head around what had happened. Kagome had attacked him, dug her human nails into his face; it felt as though she had literally been trying to claw his eyes out. When he dropped his arm, the sleeve of his kosode came away bloody. He blinked to clear his blurred vision, but that only resulted in stabbing pain, as more of the world became tinted red. If he was human, this incident would probably result in permanent loss of vision. But if he could recover from having a pearl ripped from his eye, then he would heal fully from a few scratches as well, even severe ones. His own health was the furthest thing from his mind at the moment, anyway.

"Kagome…why?" he asked out of reflex, only to have her laugh in his face. She stood gazing cruelly down at him, flanked by Kagura and Kanna, her vicious smirk firmly back in place.

"Do you honestly still believe that I’m Kagome?" she posed, as if speaking to a child.

Inuyasha wasn’t stupid. Deep down, he’d known almost from the moment she opened her eyes that Naraku’s infant was in control of her body. But that observation shocked him to the core; even now, he struggled to fully come to terms with it. To think that his strong, determined Kagome had been possessed by an incarnation of Naraku…it was almost unfathomable. And yet, this cold reality was literally staring him in the face.

Seeing that Inuyasha was still too dazed to find his voice, the infant decided to wrap this up. His business here was completed, and there was much work to be done. Not before he had a little fun with the pathetic hanyou, of course.

"I suppose I should thank you, Inuyasha. Kagome was tougher than I’d imagined. I would not have been able to corrupt her heart if it weren’t for your help."

The hanyou’s eyes widened, his guilt-ridden expression indicating that he knew exactly what the infant was referring to.

"Don’t worry, though. I’ll take good care of her. I need her eyes, after all. I will use them to find the last shard of the Shikon no Tama. I could offer to return her body to you when I’m finished, but I suspect that Naraku has other plans."

The thinly-veiled threat seemed to get Inuyasha’s attention; he stood and growled furiously, though the sound didn’t have much bite to it. "If you hurt Kagome, I’ll—"

"You’ll what? The only way for you to hurt me is to hurt _her_. Face it, Inuyasha, there’s nothing you can do. Kagome is _mine_ now, thanks to you. You practically handed her over to me yourself."

Inuyasha stumbled back as if physically struck, clutching his chest. Naraku’s infant chuckled to himself as he drank it all in—the despair, the remorse, the self-hatred…sweet nectar. But alas, it really was time to wrap this up.

"Oh, and one more thing," he said, fiddling with the knot at his waist. Once that was unfastened, he shrugged off Inuyasha’s haori and tossed into the hanyou’s face. "I no longer have any use for a half-breed’s robes," he sneered, knowing that comment would cut deep, delivered in Kagome’s voice as it was. He was still chuckling quietly to himself as he and Kanna flew off with Kagura on her feather. Much as he would have loved to stay and torment Inuyasha some more, there really was a lot of work to be done.

But first, an appointment with the boss. He had a feeling that Naraku was going to be thrilled to finally meet his nemesis up close and personal.

* * *

The strength in Inuyasha’s legs deserted him, and he slumped to the hard floor on his backside. The burning sensation in his retinas returned with a vengeance, and this time he was unable to stop the tears from flowing. They ran down his cheeks, tinged with blood, and dripped onto his clothing. Inuyasha noticed none of this; he was deeply imprisoned within his own private hell. If an enemy had attacked him at this moment, it was questionable whether he would even react. Perhaps a part of him would have accepted death as a fair punishment for his failures. _"Kagome is_ mine _now, thanks to you. You practically handed her over to me yourself."_ His mind rebelled against those words, resisted their devastating implications, but he could no longer deny the truth. He had a tremendous amount of faith in Kagome. She never would have allowed herself to be possessed, unless her resolve was fatally weakened by someone she held dear. Someone she loved. _"Yes, but he does not love you. You have always been, and will always be, second best."_

"I…" he mumbled, the rest of his statement cut off by a shuddering sob. _I did it. It was me. Kagome’s gone…and it’s my fault._

Inuyasha squeezed his eyes shut and bit his lower lip hard enough to draw blood, fighting the urge to howl his misery to the heavens. If only he had known how strongly his continued commitment to Kikyou was affecting her, maybe things would have been different. _You did know. You saw how badly Kagome was hurting, and you did nothing._ That realization made him want to disembowel himself with Tetsusaiga. He had gotten Kagome pregnant, then instead of doing the honorable thing and marrying her, he had merely promised to stay until their child was grown. That of course implied that there would be no additional children born to them, if there was to be any physical intimacy at all. And to top it all off, he would only stay by Kagome’s side when Kikyou wasn’t calling him or in danger. Then the younger miko truly was, to use the infant’s words, ‘second best.’ Inuyasha had always considered himself an honorable man, but treating the mother of his child this way was a huge stain upon his honor, and hers. He had _dishonored_ her, taken advantage of her selfless nature and love for him to relegate her to an inferior status, when in fact she deserved nothing less than his full and complete devotion.

Why had he always elevated his obligations to Kikyou to such a paramount position? Kagome was _carrying his child_ , so surely honor dictated that he place her above _all_ other responsibilities. She and their child were his _family_ , after all. _Yeah, staying with Kagome is the most honorable thing_ ,his own mind snorted at him. _It’s also what you really want._ And yet, he had set aside the true desires of his heart, and _hers_ , in favor of an old, self-imposed obligation to a former love who yearned to drag him to hell with her. Did that just about sum up his idiocy? Although ‘idiocy’ was too benign a term; _cruelty_ was a more apt description. Intentional or not, his treatment of Kagome had been downright despicable. Yes, he had made a commitment to her, but had he informed Kikyou of even this most anemic and feeble of promises? Of course not; he had stuck his head in the sand instead. Was it any wonder that Kagome had lost faith?

"I…I’m sorry, Kagome. Kami, I’m so, _so_ sorry."

He felt marginally better for having uttered those words of apology. There was only so much self-blame he could take before he really was tempted to commit seppuku. But killing himself would be the easy way out, and it would be counterproductive. He felt his heart throb with renewed vigor, his hands clenching into fists. He pulled himself to his feet and dried his tears. He was a failure, as a man and a friend and any other way he could think of. But he was also Kagome’s best chance at salvation. With Tetsusaiga, he was by far the strongest person interested in killing Naraku, aside from Sesshoumaru. And that heartless bastard didn’t give a shit about Kagome. Inuyasha did. He cared, so deeply it scared him sometimes. It had taken him far too long to get his priorities straight, but he would never abandon Kagome to the likes of Naraku. He would follow her to the ends of the Earth and beyond if need be. He drew reassurance from the infant’s words; Kagome would remain alive until the last jewel shard was found. She could still be saved. He had to believe that her consciousness was in there somewhere, because the alternative was horrifying beyond all description.

An encouraging thought occurred to him. _When Kagome first woke up…that little bastard tried to purify me!_ Inuyasha was sure of it now; there was no other reason to grab his head like that. And yet, the hanyou hadn’t felt the slightest tingle of spiritual energy. Judging by his quiet curse, the infant had honestly been expecting to be able to control Kagome’s power. In reality, it seemed that he possessed her physical form only. Optimistically, this meant that Kagome’s consciousness could still be alive, and still resisting. _That’s it, Kagome. Fight him! Stay alive until I can free you._ These revelations raised Inuyasha’s spirits significantly. To be honest, he was now more concerned about the fate of the child in Kagome’s belly, since the tiny quarter-youkai held no usefulness to Naraku whatsoever. But there was nothing he could do, except pray. _Please, Kagome, if you’re in there…watch over our son._

Now that he had firmed his resolve, Inuyasha debated what to do next. He could try to follow Kagome’s trail, but that would be almost impossible. He had given them too much of a head start; airborne scents did not last long before dispersing. And unlike the previous chase, Kagura would surely try to throw him off the trail. Before, she had basically flown in a straight line, as though she had been ordered to _let_ him follow her. Inuyasha wouldn’t put it past the infant, who struck him as sadistic enough to want to meet him just so he could throw what he’d done to Kagome in his face. Ultimately, chasing after them now was far more likely to get him lost in the wilderness than it was to actually lead him to Naraku. It would also force him to abandon what remained of his friends, who would have no way to find him. Kirara’s nose wouldn’t be able to track his movements over such distances, even if the villagers pointed them in the right direction. So there was really only one viable option left to him, as loath as he was to accept it.

Inuyasha gulped, less than thrilled by the prospect of explaining Kagome’s abduction to his friends. Not that he didn’t deserve any verbal abuse or physical retribution they decided to visit upon him. They were entitled to the truth, and he could man up enough to give it to them. And if they decided that he was scum which they no longer desired to associate with, he would let them go. But if that was the case, then what chance did he have of ever getting Kagome to forgive him? _It doesn’t matter,_ he decided. Even if the Kami assured him that Kagome would hate him for the rest of her days, he would still give his all to rescue her. He would pour his heart and soul into this mission, and if he succeeded, he would deal with the aftermath when the time came.

As to the here and now, Miroku and Sango had promised to arrive at the village in the early morning, as long as Kirara was well enough to carry them. Dawn had come and gone during his time at the temple; the birds and other diurnal creatures had already roused and were going about their daily business. It had taken Inuyasha at least an hour sprinting at top speed to reach this location, probably longer. If he didn’t head back soon, he might not beat his friends to the village. And if he wasn’t there to meet them, they might decide to go off looking for him and Kagome, which could cost all of them valuable time. Time was one thing they did not have in abundant supply. Somehow, they had to find the last shard of the Shikon no Tama before Naraku did. Only then could they ensure Kagome’s safety; as long as Naraku did not possess all of the shards, then he wouldn’t harm her. In theory, at least. But it was a theory Inuyasha had to cling to, lest he lose his mind imagining all of the varied and disturbing possibilities.

His heart wasn’t in it, but he made good time as he ran back to the village, covering the distance in a couple hours at most. The majority of the settlement still stood, though Inuyasha knew many of the inhabitants were dead. This, combined with the fact that the surrounding fields had been reduced to a youkai graveyard, meant that the survivors would probably relocate their village or disperse to join other nearby towns. Inuyasha didn’t particularly care what they did; he and Kagome had already done enough for these people.

His friends had already arrived, but crucially they hadn’t left yet. It looked like they were debating what to do when Sango spotted his approach.

"Inuyasha!" she called, her relief turning to concern when she noticed who wasn’t with him. "Where’s Kagome-chan?"

Inuyasha grimaced as he drew to a halt before them, dreading his inevitable confession. They deserved to know and he deserved their anger, but that didn’t make it any easier to actually admit the truth. He valued their opinions of him, which were about to take a severe blow.

"Inuyasha!" Sango exclaimed, fear and fury mingling in her tone. "Where’s Kagome-chan?!" Still Inuyasha failed to respond, which caused the taijiya to assume the worst. "Oh, Kami," she gasped, covering her mouth with her hand. "Is she…"

"No!" Inuyasha replied immediately, though whether he was trying to convince Sango or himself, he couldn’t say. "Kagome’s alive. At least…I think she is."

"What the _hell_ happened?" Sango demanded through gritted teeth, her temper seemingly ready to explode at his evasive responses.

"She…was possessed by Naraku’s incarnation," Inuyasha finally admitted. "An infant. He took over her body, then left with Kagura."

"Wha—how did that happen? How could you let any incarnation of Naraku get close to her?!"

Inuyasha bristled at that; Kagome’s abduction was his fault, but not because he’d been negligent in guarding her during the battle. "You try protecting Kagome and saving a whole fucking village at the same time!"

"Inuyasha," Miroku interjected before Sango could retort. The monk had remained silent throughout the exchange, studying his friend’s body language. Obviously, he had not liked the sense of remorse he could feel rolling off the hanyou. He only hoped his suspicions were incorrect.

"Kagome-sama has proven resilient against possession in the past," he stated, thinking of the incident with Tsubaki in particular. "Are you sure she has fallen completely under Naraku’s influence?"

Inuyasha gulped and nodded, knowing that his time of judgment had finally arrived. Miroku already suspected something, and there was clearly no point in beating around the bush any longer.

"I-it’s my fault," he choked out, voice barely above a whisper. "Because I couldn’t let Kikyou go…the infant was able to corrupt Kagome’s heart."

Inuyasha sensed the anger in the air, frightening in its intensity. Sango’s eyes narrowed, her intent almost murderous.

"You _bastard._ "

Then hiraikotsu was moving, its leading edge tearing toward him. Inuyasha closed his eyes and waited. He felt the displaced air brush against his cheek, as the boomerang swung in a great vertical arc and smashed into the ground directly to his left. Sango tore the weapon out of the earth, face flushed with fury, and stalked away from him. After a few steps, she visibly took a deep breath to take the edge off of her rage, then turned to face him once more. Though he was glad that the taijiya hadn’t actually struck him, Inuyasha knew he wasn’t getting off so easily.

Sango marched right up to him and grasped the front of his robes in her hand, shaking him harshly as she glared up at him. "Inuyasha, you’d better make a fucking decision. You promise me, right _now_ , that you will devote every waking moment of your life to getting Kagome-chan back. If you so much as _sniff_ in that dead bitch’s direction, so help me, I’ll leave your sorry ass behind and go look for her myself!"

"You won’t be alone, Sango," Miroku promised. "I will join you."

"Me too," Shippou added, and when Kirara mewed angrily in agreement, the ultimatum was complete.

Inuyasha nodded, truthfully not surprised by their demand. He’d had a lot of time on the way over here to consider how they might react, and this ultimatum or something similar had seemed very likely. So he already knew what answer he was going to give. Initially, the thought of not following leads on Kikyou’s whereabouts had caused him angst, but he’d gotten over it. She’d been surviving without him since her resurrection; she didn’t need him. Kagome, on the other hand, most definitely did. Just as he needed her. It had occurred to him that even after learning of Kikyou’s apparent demise, he’d never cried over her. He’d searched frantically for any sign of her continued existence, of course, but had shed no tears. This morning marked at least the second time he’d cried for Kagome. And it hadn’t been a case of a few rogue tears sneaking out; he’d wept like a baby, plain and simple.

So what did that mean? Did he return the love which Kagome had professed before losing herself? He’d resolved not to think about that. Now was not the time to reflect on his feelings; he could sort out his emotions after getting Kagome back, and learning how she felt about him after her ordeal. He did vow that he would never again allow her to feel like she was ‘second best.’ Because she wasn’t. He didn’t know exactly where Kagome and Kikyou fit into his heart, but Kagome was second to no one. One day, he hoped to have the opportunity to make sure she knew it.

"I promise," he told his friends, seemingly surprising them with the strength and conviction in his tone. "Getting Kagome back is my one and only priority."

What followed was awkward silence, succeeded by an even more awkward conversation in which Inuyasha refrained from participating. Miroku and Sango debated what to do now, and agreed that they should continue to wander the countryside, checking out every rumor of suspicious activity. They unknowingly confirmed Inuyasha’s belief that it was absolutely crucial to find the final jewel shard before Naraku did. The also reached the conclusion that the infant was likely a piece of Naraku’s heart, which the dark hanyou had discarded at Mount Hakurei in order to make himself capable of harming Kikyou. But what did that mean? Could Naraku be killed while the infant, his heart, still lived? And if not, how were they supposed to kill the infant while it was safely hidden within Kagome’s body? Their mission suddenly seemed more daunting than ever.

After a brief and fruitless conversation with the local villagers, the Inu-gang set out. They had no particular destination in mind, but were sure they would run into trouble sooner or later. No one spoke, and Inuyasha got the distinct impression that he would be receiving the silent treatment for a while. Again, nothing he hadn’t expected. This had gone about as well as it possibly could have. His friends were beyond pissed at him, but they had at least given him a chance to redeem himself. He could ask for nothing more.

He would not disappoint them. _Wait for me, Kagome. Please, wait for me._

* * *

"Kukuku, Kagome, how nice of you come," Naraku greeted with a malicious smile, appearing ridiculously pleased with himself. "Welcome to my castle."

The infant gazing at his master through the miko’s eyes barely resisted the urge to roll them. _So he still thinks that my infant form is with Kagura, controlling this body from the outside._ The wind sorceress had been only too happy to drop him off at the castle entrance, leaving him to enter their master’s chambers alone. She obviously wanted as little to do with Naraku as possible, an emotion he was beginning to understand himself. Though he supposed he couldn’t blame Naraku for the misconception; the dark hanyou’s understanding _had_ been the original plan. But plans could and should be changed, especially if they were deemed unsuitable by those who had to stick their necks out. Cowards like Naraku who loved to send others into harm’s way from behind the scenes had no right to complain when every detail failed to fall into place according to their machinations. The ultimate goal of possessing Kagome had been accomplished, even if the end result wasn’t exactly what Naraku had intended.

Though looking at him now, the infant realized that Naraku might have more in mind for Kagome’s body than using it to find the final shard of the Shikon no Tama. His borrowed skin crawled at his master’s suddenly leering gaze. Lust and its brethren were just a few of the emotions the infant did not share, and was glad for it. They only complicated matters and clouded judgment. He had been born an infant, and though his mind was fully matured, he supposed his physical being would always be that of child, no matter whose body he inhabited. As a result, he did not share Naraku’s attraction to Kagome’s female form. Gender was essentially immaterial to him; all he cared about was strength. Kagome’s human body was weak and fragile, but dwelling in it was certainly better than being trapped inside the form of an infant, even a full-youkai one.

There were downsides, of course. Naraku approached, grinning lasciviously now, and walked around him in a slow circle, giving his incarnation the distinct impression that he was undressing Kagome’s body with his eyes. A disturbing realization, to be sure, almost as distressing as the way the hanyou took her hair in his hand and deeply inhaled its scent.

"I’m could defile you, Kagome," Naraku rasped, his voice throaty and full of promise. "I could make it so that no one will ever want you again, not even Inuyasha." Then abruptly he released her hair with a casual flick of his wrist, and stepped away from her with a contemplative sigh.

"But then again, one could say that I’d only be using you as a replacement for Kikyou. And I’ve left those filthy desires behind me."

While relieved to hear this, the infant was nonetheless driven to make sure his master knew where the line for his conduct was drawn, lest the sick bastard change his mind again.

"You will not touch me, Naraku," he declared firmly in Kagome’s voice. "This body is _mine_ , not yours."

"Do not forget your place, worm," Naraku growled, delivering his rebuke with his head cocked to the side, still believing that his incarnation’s physical form was elsewhere in the castle. "You are controlling this girl on my orders. Kagome is mine to do with as I please."

"She is not. Kagome belongs to me now. If you require my assistance in completing the Shikon no Tama, you will leave Kagome’s body alone. Your ‘attentions’ are something I do not wish to experience."

Naraku scoffed. "You speak as though you are actually inside her body, rather than a helpless infant I could crush under heel as easily as I breathe."

"That is because I _am_ inside Kagome," he announced, using Kagome’s lips to deliver his own voice. "I told you before, this body is _mine._ "

Naraku’s eyes went wide, then narrowed in fury. In the next instant, the dark hanyou’s face hovered mere centimeters from Kagome’s, his hand clenched around the delicate flesh of her neck. Whatever he glimpsed in her eyes did not please him.

"Explain," he demanded, tightening his grip on her throat. The message was clear; if the next words out of her mouth were not satisfactory, he would kill Kagome, reabsorb his heart, and come up with a new plan.

"This girl proved tougher than I had anticipated," the infant stated, using Kagome’s voice once more. "I can exert more control over her if I am inside her body."

That wasn’t a lie, but it was nowhere near the whole truth either. He really could control Kagome better from in here, in theory at least. If he’d remained in his infant form, however, he probably could’ve accomplished the same objective with a tainted jewel shard. But Naraku didn’t need to know that. Nor should he be made aware of the real reason why his supposedly loyal incarnation had chosen to take the body of his hated enemy as his own. The infant had decided early on that no good would come from helping Naraku complete the Shikon no Tama. The hanyou was a fool, driven by his hatred and lust for a mere human woman. He was an unfit master, both of the Shikon no Tama and of those born from his own flesh. And he thought nothing of said incarnations; he would destroy them all once he had what he desired. So the true rationale behind the infant’s decision was very simple. When the day came for Naraku to destroy him or absorb him back into his body, which form would he rather fight for his life in? A helpless infant, or a powerful miko?

The answer had been obvious, also in theory. That is, until he discovered that he could not control Kagome’s spiritual energy. The stubborn girl still survived on some plane of consciousness, and as a result her power as a miko remained beyond his grasp. He hoped that eventually he could completely break what remained of Kagome’s mind and wield her spiritual energy as she did. Provided that Naraku didn’t kill him here, he had some time to complete this task. It was worth the risk of incurring the hanyou’s wrath, because if he reverted to his infant form, he was as good as dead anyway. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but someday soon. The only way he would survive to live his own life, aside from the unlikely proposition of Inuyasha and his friends actually defeating Naraku, was to remain within Kagome and gain access to her power. So that is what he would do.

Again, provided that Naraku didn’t kill him here and now, which still seemed like a distinct possibility. But fortunately, the dark hanyou appeared to be using the small portion of his brain devoted to logic and reason. _That’s right, you fool. You know I’m your best hope of getting your grubby hands on that damn jewel shard, and your only hope of finding it quickly._ Finally, Naraku released him, though he clearly was not happy about it. That was fine; let him be angry! Let him be suspicious too, for none of it mattered so long as Kagome was useful. And she would be; her possessor would make sure of that. _I will help you get what you want, Naraku, and then I will destroy you. You have underestimated this girl’s power for the last time._ Now, all he needed to do was figure out how to tap into Kagome’s massive reserves of spiritual energy.

But a pissy Naraku would not be pleasant to deal with, and having his plaything taken away had clearly put him in a petulant mood. The infant did know of one thing which would raise his master’s spirits, however.

"I have a bit of unexpected information which you might find interesting," he stated with an amused smirk, placing a hand on Kagome’s belly. "Kagome is with child."

"What?" Naraku breathed, his surprise quickly turning to delight. "Is it Inuyasha’s?"

"It is."

"Kukuku, that is _rich._ Oh, Inuyasha, you profess undying devotion to Kikyou, and yet you sire a child upon her copy. I wish I had known before I killed Kikyou. I would have loved to have seen her face…"

This time the infant did roll his eyes. _She already knew, you idiot_. His access to Kagome’s memories told him as much. _And she’s not dead, either._ This he couldn’t be sure of, but he honestly believed it. He wasn’t about to share either of these thoughts with his master, however, who seemed to be in a much better mood than only a few moments ago.

"How must Inuyasha feel knowing that I hold his child’s life in my hands?"

One of said hands reached slowly for Kagome’s belly, its owner apparently seeking to confirm for himself the existence of Inuyasha’s spawn. Her possessor had no complaints, so long as those attentions did not turn violent. He didn’t think they would, but honestly there wasn’t much he could do if they did. Pretty much his only recourse at this point was refusing to help Naraku find the final jewel shard, and that threat would only have so much effectiveness. Fortunately, it appeared that Naraku’s intentions were relatively benign.

A sudden explosion of spiritual energy shocked both males, as Naraku reflexively yanked back his burned hand. His fingers had actually been a few centimeters away from making contact with Kagome’s blouse, but that hadn’t stopped her miko power from giving him a nasty shock, much to the surprise of both master and incarnation. The former, however, glared furiously at his underling, believing him to be at fault.

"I didn’t do that," the infant swore. "I…do not have control over her spiritual power." He grimaced; he hadn’t wanted to admit that, but there was no choice now.

"Really?" Naraku asked doubtfully.

"It’s true! If I could control her power, would I not have used it when you had your hand around my throat?"

Naraku pondered the truth of that statement, eventually reaching the correct conclusion. "Can you still see the Shikon no Tama?"

"I can."

He had made sure of that before even setting foot inside the castle. From the skies overhead, Naraku’s portion of the jewel had lit up like a beacon to Kagome’s eyes. He could not use her spiritual energy, but at least her unique visual ability was completely functional. Upon hearing that, Naraku actually seemed somewhat pleased by this turn of events. _Heh, he probably thinks I’m less of a threat now. That’s right, Naraku, let your guard down. One day, I will make you pay for it._

"One thing I still don’t understand," Naraku wondered aloud, "is why her power manifested when I moved to touch her stomach, but not when I threatened her life."

The infant shrugged Kagome’s shoulders. "A mother’s protective instinct, I would assume."

"Humans," Naraku snorted with a derisive shake of his head and a dismissive wave of his hand. "That is all. Go put on some more appropriate clothing."

The infant bowed and left, thrilled to be departing from his master’s oppressive presence. He could only take so much of the hanyou’s foolishness in one sitting. _He yearns for a human, but he doesn’t understand them. He wants to break Kagome, but he doesn’t know her._ It was a shortcoming the infant did not share. He knew Kagome, knew what made her laugh, cry, feel excitement or sorrow. He knew what had made her who she was today, and what she hoped to become in the future. And he would use that knowledge to destroy her.

There was no time like the present to get started.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Okay, so here’s the scoop. For the longest time, I interpreted the infant’s words in the manga to mean that he intended to merge with Kagome and literally use her eyes as his own (as opposed to going into hiding and controlling her from the outside). When I looked at the anime/manga again recently, however, I realized that this might have been a misunderstanding on my part. But I had already outlined the entire remainder of this story based on that premise. So if this isn’t a strictly canon interpretation, I can live with it. I don’t think it’s an unreasonable interpretation by any means, so I will once again ask you kind readers to ‘just go with it.’ 
> 
> And in case you were wondering, Mimisenri doesn’t exist in this story, or at the very least Naraku doesn’t know about him. He’s the guy with the big ears who ‘hears’ where the final jewel shard is in canon. No offense to Rumiko Takahashi, but that always struck me as a cop-out on her part. Naraku fails to get Kagome’s eyes, then almost immediately goes and talks to a guy with an even more reliable method for locating the jewel shard. So…why bother trying to take Kagome’s eyes at all? Why not just kill her when you had the chance? Anyway, the point is that Naraku doesn’t know of a good ‘Plan B’ in this story, which is part of the reason why he allows the infant to live even while harboring suspicions about his loyalty.


	25. The Gateway

Inuyasha sighed in exasperation, impatiently tapping his foot on the ground. He sat with his back against a tree, arms folded across his chest and lips quirked in an irritated scowl. But he knew enough about ‘moments’ to identify the scene taking place behind him as such, so he resolved to give Miroku and Sango a little more time. He was still walking on eggshells around them; they had only started talking to him yesterday afternoon, after several days of ignoring him or worse. Sango had been especially hostile at times, which could be explained by her passionate personality and close relationship with Kagome. She had yet to strike him with hiraikotsu, but that was probably because he’d been going out of his way to behave and not make things worse.

His humility had definitely saved all of them some serious stress, but it had backfired big time last night and into this morning. He _really_ should have put his foot down the previous evening about this damn village. Instead, he’d let Miroku talk him and Sango into staying here, resulting in a colossal waste of time. _The damn humans didn’t even get any sleep like they were supposed to._ That was the primary reason he’d assented to the stopover; he’d hoped that a night indoors would give them more restful sleep, allowing them to cover more ground the next day. So much for that idea; between the drama and the aftermath, every member of the Inu-gang had pulled an all-nighter. _All because some dumb bitch of a youkai had to go and start trouble._

They’d been searching for signs of suspicious activity which could be linked to the Shikon no Tama when they first heard the rumor about a village of oni-women. Soon after, they’d come across a settlement composed of _only_ women, most of whom had lost husbands or family in one war or another. Mildly suspicious, maybe, but not something Inuyasha was prepared to stop and investigate. Miroku had other ideas. At first, Inuyasha had been downright pissed at the monk for thinking with his cock at a time like this. But perhaps because things had been so tense as of late, and the group dynamic had shifted so dramatically with Kagome gone, the lecherous houshi had been more driven than ever to find ‘relief.’ Eventually the hanyou decided to let Miroku have his fling and be done with it. If Sango wanted to stop him, she could damn well do it herself. If not, Inuyasha would retrieve him before midnight and drag him back to their room for some actual _sleep_. Letting him stay ‘up’ with his chosen girl all night would not be very productive toward that end. And then that plan had gone straight to hell in a hurry.

Now here he sat, in the forest at the edge of a grassy field near the village of former oni-possessed-women, where Miroku and Sango were discussing their future. _Heh, so the lecher finally found a woman willing to bear his child, eh?_ Inuyasha could only imagine what Kagome would say if she were here. He sighed again, this time a twinge of dark emotion seeping into his voice. He felt like a total jackass now, and not solely because he had caused Kagome to miss out on this moment. He _was_ happy for Miroku and Sango, and yet…

"It’s okay to be jealous."

Inuyasha blinked, then turned toward the speaker to find Shippou studying him with an appraising look. He opened his mouth to deny it, but in the end couldn’t muster the pigheadedness to advance that gigantic lie. Why else would he be feeling this way about Miroku’s proposal? The kit’s words eased his conscience with respect to his jealousy, which was obvious even to him. Shippou had been the first member of the group to reconcile with him, after only a day or so. Perhaps that was a child’s forgiving nature, but Inuyasha was grateful, whatever the reason. He had felt very lonely prior to Shippou hopping up to his shoulder that day like nothing was amiss. The kit had continued to spend a part of each afternoon with him in the same manner, just sharing companionable silence. Shippou would never know how much that meant to him.

"You think so?" Inuyasha replied, feigning nonchalance.

"Yep. Kagome would be jealous, if she were here. But she would be happy for them too."

The kit’s mention of the missing miko was clearly not designed to lower Inuyasha’s spirits, but it had that effect, at least temporarily. It was true; Shippou had described exactly how Kagome would feel. Inuyasha felt much of his jealous guilt melt away. He was happy for the couple, and maybe his envy was a positive development as well. Shippou obviously thought so. Was his subconscious trying to tell him what he truly desired? Probably. But then again, he had resolved not to contemplate his feelings until after Kagome was returned to them, safe and sound. So he pushed those thoughts to the back of his mind. Miroku and Sango were finished anyway, the monk having failed to assure his new fiancé that he wouldn’t chase after other women. _Tch, typical Miroku. Things will only get more complicated from here…_ Before standing to join them, Inuyasha ruffled Shippou’s hair and uttered a quiet word of thanks. The kit nodded and hopped up onto his shoulder. Together, they rejoined their companions and set out.

* * *

Inuyasha woke screaming, toppling from his perch in the tree with a great involuntary spasm. It was a good thing his chosen branch had been fairly high up, or he never would’ve gotten his feet underneath him in time. As it was, he landed gracelessly on his heels with a heavy thud, barely maintaining his balance as he struggled to gather his bearings. It was also a good thing that none of his companions had set up their sleeping rolls under the tree. Or the campfire, for that matter.

"Are you all right, Inuyasha?"

The hanyou cursed under his breath. It was Sango who spoke, but all four of his friends were gazing at him in concern, having been roused from slumber by the tremendous amount of noise he’d made. This wasn’t the first time since Kagome’s abduction that he’d had a nightmare; far from it, actually. But it was the first time he’d screamed loud enough to wake the others, or fallen out of his tree. In other circumstances, this sort of thing might be a source of mild embarrassment. But now, having his weakness so clearly revealed to all of his friends just put him in a sour mood.

"I’m fine," he growled. "Go back to sleep."

Without another word, he spun and stalked off into the forest. He needed to blow off some steam, so he took off at a run, turning to make a wide circle around the campsite. If he was going to be out here, he might as well check for youkai. Because he _really_ didn’t want to sleep anymore tonight, not after that dream. The term ‘nightmare’ didn’t do it justice. The things Naraku had been doing to her, as her resistance slowly weakened… Finally, she’d turned to him, swiveling her head around one hundred eighty degrees like an owl, and uttered a sentence which seared his very soul. _"I no longer have any use for a half-breed."_

That was apparently the point where his subconscious finally decided it had seen enough, that reality had been suspended for a sufficient length of time. Because for Kagome to behave that way, or say those words to him, it wouldn’t really be _her_ in control of her body. Inuyasha knew this, but that didn’t make the nightmare any easier to deal with. Because who was to say that Naraku wasn’t planning to hurt her, or hadn’t already done so? Was their child even still alive in her womb? Inuyasha hated feeling so helpless, an emotion which he guessed was primarily responsible for his nightmares. Kagome was beyond his protection, and his subconscious was manifesting all of the terrible things which could happen to her while he wasn’t by her side. He tried to avoid sleeping as much as possible, as a result. But he had to get _some_ sleep, if only so he could be in good fighting condition when they finally did find Kagome or Naraku. Hence the nightmare this evening.

Eventually, Inuyasha drew to a halt, having lost the energy to finish his patrol. He was tired—physically, mentally, and emotionally exhausted. He wanted to sleep, but knew that he would get no reprieve from his guilt. He could never forget that Kagome was in Naraku’s clutches because of his failures. He groaned, rubbing his eye with the palm of his hand. He knew one thing which would help him relax, though he hated having to rely on it. Still, it provided just about the only comfort left to him in this cold, dreary, Kagome-less world. And it was a comfort he desperately needed right now.

By the time he arrived back at camp, his friends were all sleeping again. Stealthily he crept around the outskirts of the clearing, making his way to where Kagome’s bag rested against a tree. He’d been lugging it around ever since the miko’s disappearance, the burden serving as both a comforting weight and a chilling reminder. Checking once more to make sure that no one was awake to witness his actions, he slowly drew open the top flap and reached inside to withdraw his hidden treasure. The familiar green and white fabric was cool to the touch, but he could almost imagine the warmth of her skin as he held it in his hands. Almost. He gazed at the garments sadly for a moment, then brought them to his nose and inhaled deeply.

Part of him still felt guilty while doing this, as though it was wrong in some way. He supposed it could be construed as perverted, but for Inuyasha there was nothing sexual about it. He simply needed her scent; it comforted him and helped him maintain his sanity. This uniform, which she had been wearing on the evening prior to her abduction, was the only thing left which still carried her scent with any degree of strength. But it wouldn’t last forever. As Kagome’s natural fragrance faded, his nose had to work harder and harder, and his anxiety increased.

But for tonight at least, her lingering aroma was enough to soothe him. Heaving a tired sigh, he replaced the garments in the bag and settled down against the base of the tree. He closed his eyes, hoping that his fleeting sense of serenity would lead to more restful sleep. And if he did have another nightmare, at least he wouldn’t roll his ass out of the tree again.

* * *

"Ugh, this is intolerable."

He had gone to such lengths to obtain Kagome’s eyes. The main objective of the plot had been achieved, yet now his success felt more like a curse. Seemingly endless hours staring into Kanna’s mirror would do that. She was lousy company to begin with; whenever he complained, which was often, she just stared at him blankly. Would it kill her to show a little sympathy? It actually might, he reflected, since exhibiting any emotion was against Kanna’s very nature. No, the only sympathy he enjoyed at the moment came in the form of self-pity. Because he certainly wasn’t getting any from Naraku or Kagura. The wind sorceress wanted as little to do with him as possible, and he only interacted with their master when Naraku decided to pester him about his progress in locating the final jewel shard. After over a week of fruitless searching, the dark hanyou’s patience was wearing thin. But then so was his own. _You try staring at this damn mirror all day every day, Naraku. Then maybe you wouldn’t bitch so much about why it’s taking so long._

It wasn’t all bad, of course. Naraku had apparently decided that he was in fact above Onigumo’s filthy desires for human women, particularly those who looked like a certain dead miko. A conservative choice of clothing had probably helped with that. The first day back, Kagura had helped him change into a layered kimono very similar to the one she wore. The garments were comfortable and relatively easy to move around in. The very fact that he could move around was the biggest benefit of inhabiting Kagome’s body, as far as he was concerned. By contrast, he could barely lift his head up in his infant form, let alone walk or crawl. The cost was having a human body, a _female_ human body complete with intermittent abdominal discomfort due to round ligament pain—a little tidbit of information from Kagome’s memory—as well as regular food, fluid, and excretory needs. Youkai didn’t need to drink or even eat as frequently as humans did, so they didn’t produce waste nearly as often. Human bodily functions were bothersome, to say the least.

Thus far, however, the benefits outweighed the drawbacks. He would of course be looking to switch to a new body at the earliest opportunity, hopefully after Naraku was dead. And preferably before Kagome’s pregnancy progressed too much farther and became genuinely irksome. He wasn’t interested in experiencing any of the annoying symptoms which would apparently come in this ‘third trimester’ she had read about. The obvious solution was to terminate the pregnancy, but any youki-based attempt was doomed to failure courtesy of Kagome’s stubbornly protective miko power. And any physical means of killing the fetus, such as blunt force or ingesting an herbal remedy, carried with it a risk of permanently damaging her body or even killing her. For now, he would put up with a few mild pregnancy symptoms instead of taking that risk. But later, when the symptoms worsened, how long would he tolerate her condition? Again, he hoped to switch to a new body long before having to make that decision.

In the meantime, Kanna was still staring at him with that infuriatingly bland expression of hers. He really didn’t want to spend any more time looking into that mirror today, but there was no other way to locate the final jewel shard, as far as he knew. The mirror could reveal any location in the entire world, and they had been using it to scan every square meter of central Honshu for the shard’s telltale light, which Kagome’s eyes would theoretically be able to detect. It was a tedious and exceedingly boring task, one which caused him to question the wisdom of Naraku’s entire plan. He had obviously thought that finding the shard would be relatively easy, but this simply wasn’t the case. Overall, it hadn’t been one of his better ideas. _And now I’m stuck trying to bail out a sinking ship._

Unable to stomach any more monotony today, he lurched his feet and shuffled toward the room’s exit. He would relieve Kagome’s bladder, then lie down and rest her eyes for the night. Tomorrow was a new day. _Somebody kill me now._ Yawning, he stepped into the hallway without really looking, and nearly bumped right into Kagura.

"Yo, kid," the wind sorceress greeted. "Naraku wants to see you."

"Ugh, I grow so tired of his constant nagging!" he snapped in Kagome’s voice, her tone rising with his frustration. "And you! Quit calling me ‘kid.’"

"Well, what the hell am I supposed to call you? Kagome?" she mocked. That would obviously not do, but he had been thinking about this and had picked out an appropriate name for himself during this afternoon’s session with Kanna.

"Call me Hakago."

"Tch. Fine, _Hakago_ , Naraku wants to—"

"I _know!_ Just get the hell out of my way!"

Kagura chuckled behind him as he stormed off. "No luck in finding the shard, I take it?"

"Shut up."

"Maybe it fell into a volcano or something," she observed, seemingly quite amused. He was just about to tell her off when a novel thought occurred to him. His footsteps slowed as his mind began turning in a new direction. The odds of the shard falling into a volcano were astronomically small. But what about other sources of heat or fire, or destructive forces in general? The Shikon no Tama had previously been burned with Kikyou’s body, and had vanished from this world for fifty years. It was entirely possible that something similar had happened to one of the shards. And if a shard was somehow destroyed, where would it go? Spinning on his heel, he strode back into the room where Kanna still stood passively, surprising her younger sister with his sudden excitement.

"Kanna, can your mirror show worlds other than this one?"

At the girl’s nod, he felt a flash of optimism. Perhaps the reason their thorough search of this world had failed was because it was doomed from the start. Hopefully a new strategy would lead to the awaited discovery. Tomorrow though, definitely tomorrow.

"Tell Naraku that I’ve gone to rest Kagome’s eyes," he told Kagura as he passed. "And that I believe I’ll find the shard soon."

He had been hesitant to be too optimistic with Naraku, lest the estimate prove inaccurate, causing him to become an outlet for the dark hanyou’s disappointment. But if he didn’t get results soon, Naraku was going to kill him out of impatience anyway. _This is it, I guess. Either succeed or die._ Tomorrow morning he would start afresh, and continue until Kagome’s eyes fell out of their sockets. And with any luck, his salvation would come from beyond the world of the living.

* * *

Inuyasha clenched his jaw, resisting the urge to sigh. He’d been doing too much of that lately, to the point where not ten minutes ago, Sango had snapped at him to knock it off. He knew where she was coming from, but he honestly couldn’t help it sometimes. He was absolutely miserable, so it was only natural to express that emotion subconsciously. Of course, his friends weren’t pleased with the current situation either. It had been about a week and a half since any of them had last seen Kagome. Only nine or ten days without her, yet it felt like an eternity. How much longer could he survive before going insane? The worst part was the uncertain nature of their quest. If they had an objective, even a minor goal to achieve, it wouldn’t be so bad. But wandering around the countryside day after day looking for a needle in a haystack threatened to drive him mad. He still couldn’t get any peace at night; he managed just enough sleep between nightmares to keep his brain from turning into goo. Miroku and Sango had been pushing themselves as well, allowing the group to travel from dawn until after dusk. Kirara carried them for part of each afternoon, since the rest of the time the little feline could ride on someone’s shoulder. While they moved at a much quicker pace while she was transformed, it felt like they were only getting to nowhere faster than normal.

They had yet to discover any suspicious activity actually relating to the Shikon no Tama, and with each passing day Inuyasha grew increasingly pessimistic that they ever would. More and more it seemed that they would not find Naraku or Kagome until the dark hanyou had already located the final shard. And if that was the case, the chances of ever seeing her alive again decreased dramatically.

"Here, Inuyasha," Shippou said, breaking the hanyou from his musings. The kit handed him his portion of the evening meal, which consisted of a rabbit he’d caught earlier in the day. In retrospect, he probably should have hunted for something else to go along with it, since it wasn’t enough to satisfy five hungry mouths. He ended up giving some of his portion to Shippou, who probably needed the meat more than he did, as a young youkai. Inuyasha didn’t have much of an appetite anyway.

The group was settling down for the night when a sudden gust of wind caused the fire to crackle and flicker. Inuyasha shot to his feet, recognizing the scent on the breeze instantly.

"Kagura!" he declared, even as the wind sorceress vaulted down from her feather to land a few meters away. He forcefully repressed his initial urge, which was to charge over and throttle her for information. Kagura had come for a reason, so he would hear what she had to say. She looked ready for hostilities anyway, her fan open and her feather already clasped between two fingers in case she had to make a quick escape.

"Yo," she greeted casually, as if nothing was amiss.

"What do you want, Kagura?" Inuyasha demanded, as politely as he could manage.

"Hakago sent me to tell you that he’s heading to the mountains in the land of fire. There’s a gateway to the borderline between this world and the next there."

"Who is Hakago?" Miroku interjected heatedly. "And why are you telling us this?"

Kagura shrugged. "Hakago is what that little cretin who possessed Kagome is calling himself these days. As for why he instructed me to tell you where he was going, I have no idea. You should ask him yourself." With that dismissive comment, the wind sorceress flicked her wrist and soared into the air on her feather.

"Wait, Kagura!"

Inuyasha didn’t honestly expect her to stop, but perhaps it was the desperation in his tone which caught her attention. She hovered, glowering down at him expectantly.

"Tell me, _please_ ," he begged, not caring how pathetic he sounded. "Is Kagome all right?"

He fully expected Kagura to laugh at him and take off, but instead her gaze softened. She did not come down from her feather, but she did descend to hover at a lower altitude. Was it sympathy for a fellow woman which caused her to entertain his request, or something else? Either way, Inuyasha took it as a good sign.

"Please, Kagura, I need to know."

She sighed irritably, grumbling under her breath for a moment, but then locked eyes with him and spoke frankly. "I don’t know what that brat did to her mind, but her body is unharmed. Hakago is treating it like his own, so he’s not about to let anyone damage it."

"What about the baby?"

Kagura blinked in shock. "She’s pregnant?" she asked. "Yours, I assume?"

Inuyasha nodded. "Kagome…was pregnant when you took her. I hope she still is."

Kagura’s eyes widened in understanding, then her gaze turned contemplative. "When I helped her change clothes, I noticed that her belly was a little big. I thought she’d just put on some weight, but I guess it could’ve been a baby."

"So, do you think Naraku has…has…"

"I honestly can’t say," Kagura replied, saving Inuyasha from completing his sentence. Maybe he was imagining things, but the wind sorceress seemed to be honestly wishing she had better news. "Nobody’s told me anything about it. But like I said, Hakago hasn’t let anyone harm…" She trailed off, frowning as another thought occurred to her. "After I first brought her to Naraku, I thought I felt a burst of miko energy. Maybe that’s why Naraku isn’t gloating about killing your baby to anyone who will listen."

Inuyasha’s heart clenched as he searched Kagura’s face for any sign of dishonesty. Upon finding none, his downtrodden hopes rose. _Kagome, you protected our baby, didn’t you? You’re still in there somewhere!_ And if her miko energy remained loyal to her subconscious desires, then surely Kagome could still be saved, in body, mind, and spirit. That knowledge was a balm to his wounded soul, chasing away the misery which had characterized his daily existence since her abduction. But obviously the situation could change, at any moment.

"Kagura, the baby is innocent in all this. I—"

"So what the hell do you want me to do about it?" the wind sorceress demanded incredulously. "Naraku holds my heart in his hands, remember?"

Inuyasha’s shoulders slumped. Of course Kagura couldn’t do anything to protect his baby. And even if she could, why would she? They were enemies, after all.

"But," the wind sorceress spoke solemnly. "I will do what I can." When all of her former adversaries stared at her in shock, she cracked a sad smile. "She’s lucky, to have you people."

None of the Inu-gang could explain Kagura’s sudden change of heart. Mild sympathy was completely different from an actual promise to give aid. For a woman whose primary goal in life was to gain freedom from her master, this seemed an unwise and unnecessary risk. But the knowledge of the young life in Kagome’s belly had altered her disposition drastically. Perhaps she harbored a soft spot for children, an inborn mothering instinct. More cynically, it could be postulated that she simply wished to ingratiate herself as much as possible with Naraku’s enemies, so they wouldn’t feel the need to kill her if she survived her master’s death. Whatever the reason, Inuyasha was extremely grateful for the sentiment.

"Thank you, Kagura."

"Hmph," she snorted. "Just don’t expect me to go easy on you the next time we fight."

Then she was gone, her final gust of wind snuffing out the campfire, as if to say ‘don’t think we’re friends or anything.’ Inuyasha shook his head as he knelt to rebuild it, while Shippou used his kitsune-bi to provide some light so Miroku and Sango wouldn’t trip over themselves in the dark. The new moon had been the previous evening, so there wasn’t much ambient light available. He was just glad that Kagura hadn’t visited them last night. _She probably wouldn’t have cared if I was human, though. She knows my night of weakness and she’s never told Naraku about it so far._ That alone was enough to set the wind sorceress apart from her master in Inuyasha’s mind, though her promise to watch over Kagome didn’t hurt in that regard. _I swear, Kagura, if you help us get Kagome back, I’ll forgive you for everything. I won’t harm a hair on your head._

Inuyasha could tell by his friends’ scents that they wanted to have a discussion, but they waited until the fire was going again before speaking.

"Well, that was strange," Miroku observed, trying to set a light tone.

"Keh," Inuyasha snorted, not in the mood for joking around. "We’re going."

"I don’t think anyone would argue with you, Inuyasha. But where exactly are we going? Has anyone ever been to this ‘land of fire’ before?"

"No, but I’ve heard rumors of that place from other taijiya," Sango replied. "It’s said that youkai are more numerous there, and fiercer."

"I don’t care about that. We’re fuckin’ going."

"Yes, Inuyasha, we’ve established that. It doesn’t mean we should run over there without any idea of what we’re getting into."

"Keh."

"What I don’t understand is why Hakago is going there."

"Indeed," Miroku agreed. "If his intent is to lure us into a trap, he is going unnecessarily far out of his way to do so. What is the significance of the borderline between this world and the next?"

Silence settled over the group as each member contemplated this quandary. Then Shippou suddenly snapped his fingers and jumped excitedly to his feet.

"Maybe that’s where the final jewel shard is!"

"That would make sense," Miroku affirmed. "Perhaps they have used Kagome-sama’s eyes to locate the shard in the next world, but are unable to pass through the gateway."

"Then it’s definitely a trap," Sango stated grimly. "For him to use us to break open the gateway means that it must be dangerous."

The five companions met each other’s gazes in turn, no one finding the need to state the obvious. Trap or no, they were going after their missing friend. Inuyasha for one had vowed to follow Kagome to the ends of the Earth and beyond, and it looked as though he would be keeping that promise quite literally. Nevertheless, the hanyou felt rejuvenated. Kagura’s words had given him hope, and a defined objective. He would lead his companions to the land of fire, find this gateway, and annihilate anyone who got in his way.

No one could come up with a more plausible theory, so eventually they decided to turn in for the night. Inuyasha settled down against the base of a tree next to Kagome’s bag, a position which had become customary for him since his unfortunate mishap. For once, however, he knew he would enjoy some peaceful sleep.

* * *

"Dammit!" Inuyasha cursed, grunting with exertion as he bore the pressure of his enemy’s weapon upon his sword. _Shit, this is going pretty much exactly how that Hakago bastard planned it…_

Naraku’s saimyoushou had ‘helpfully’ guided them all the way to the supposed gateway between this world and the next. This made it all the more obvious that they were walking into some sort of trap, but Inuyasha hadn’t hesitated in the slightest before entering the cave. He’d been just about the try breaking down the gate with Tetsusaiga when a strange, disembodied voice asked if he wanted to pass. That had been the start of the insanity. Next, at his affirmative response, the two statues on either side of the gate sprang to life, proceeding to try to kill him, since according to them only the dead were allowed to pass through the gate. To top it all off, the two living statues, obviously the guardians of the gateway, were apparently invulnerable to swords of this world. And now, after some futile acrobatics on his part, Inuyasha found himself trapped against the cave wall by the curved blade of one of his assailants’ weapons. Only Tetsusaiga and brute strength kept him from being cleaved in half. But that wouldn’t last for long, as the other statue was already raising his spear.

Miroku’s intervention provided a momentary respite, the kazaana pulling the guardians away though it failed to suck them in. It was also unable to dislodge the weapon holding Inuyasha in place, though it did provide the hanyou with some much-needed inspiration. Once Miroku dodged the spear point which nearly pierced him through from top to bottom, Inuyasha yelled at the monk to keep the kazaana open. Then he planted his feet against the rock at his back, and heaved with all his might. The result was as satisfying as it was spectacular, with one statue knocked into the other and both sent crashing to the ground.

Inuyasha wasted no time in savoring his success, for the guardians would soon be up again. Before they could rise, he sprinted to stand before the gateway with Tetsusaiga raised. As soon as the crimson barrier-cutting form of his sword took hold, he unleashed the Kaze no Kizu. The chains holding the gate closed were shredded easily, and the doors swung open to reveal a bright blue sky spotted with clouds, and a familiar landscape shrouded in white mist. For just a moment, Inuyasha was stunned into stupor. _Holy crap…it’s Oyaji’s grave!_

Enhanced senses and quick reflexes saved him from injury, but this time the attack hadn’t come from the guardians. Inuyasha’s blood boiled as Kagura soared past overhead with a swarm of Naraku’s youkai, sending a few more wind blades at him for good measure. She clearly wasn’t trying very hard to hit him, but her half-hearted attempts were still effective in forcing him to dodge. She was definitely going to reach the gate before him.

"Kagura, you bitch!"

Insults were clearly going to get him nowhere, however; all he could do was pursue the wind sorceress and hope the gate stayed open for a few seconds after she passed through. But just as the leading youkai reached the entryway, the situation changed drastically. A blinding light emanated from the other world, instantly turning everything it touched into stone. He heard Kagura cry out in panic as the youkai around her shattered into pieces, but didn’t look to see whether she had survived. Instead, he threw himself to the side, taking shelter behind a small rock ledge on the cave floor. For several seconds, only the sounds of youkai dying and their stony remains clattering to the ground could be heard.

 _"Do you want to pass?"_ the disembodied voice asked again.

"No, I don’t want to pass, you idiot!" Kagura shrieked in response.

_"Very well, then we’ll close the gate."_

The light vanished as soon as the doors closed, and when Inuyasha looked out from behind his shelter, the two guardians had taken their customary positions on either side of the gateway and turned into statues again. He caught a glimpse of Kagura as she beat a hasty retreat on her feather, but could tell that trying to follow her would be futile. Besides, his first priority was making sure the others were okay. They were, in part because they hadn’t been as close to the gateway as he had when the light had appeared.

"What on earth was all that about?" Sango asked, giving voice to what they were all thinking.

"It was indeed strange," Miroku agreed. "It seemed to be less of a trap and more of an experiment."

"Keh," Inuyasha snorted. "That Hakago bastard mustn’t have known what would happen when someone tried to go through the gate. He was probably using us and Kagura to test it."

"That may be true," Miroku stated. "As it turned out, it was actually fortunate that Kagura attempted to enter before you, Inuyasha."

"Heh, she nearly got her ass turned to stone."

"Well, at least we know one thing," Sango interjected. "Naraku and Hakago truly do believe that the final shard of the Shikon no Tama is beyond the gateway. Otherwise, there was no reason to send Kagura in."

Inuyasha frowned as he recalled his previous discovery. "About the world beyond the gateway…I’ve been there before."

He told his friends of his and Kagome’s trip to his father’s grave, of acquiring Tetsusaiga and the subsequent battle against Sesshoumaru. More importantly, he informed them of the black pearl which had been hidden in his right eye after his birth, which his brother had used to gain passage to the other world. Unfortunately, the good news stopped there. The black pearl had vanished into thin air soon after their return.

"So what do we do now?" Sango asked. "Is there any chance this ‘black pearl’ still exists?"

Inuyasha shrugged. "Dunno, but I know someone who might. And I think I know where’s he’s hiding."

He led them out of the cave and got his bearings, settling on the approximate direction which would take them to their new destination. Kirara had been carrying Miroku and Sango all morning, but she transformed without hesitation. She too understood that time was of the essence, now that they had an actual lead. _Heh, let’s go see if my ‘loyal vassal’ can be useful for a change._

* * *

"Hakago, you bastard…"

He had the gall to glance at her casually over his shoulder, wearing an innocent expression. The fact that it was Kagome’s face being manipulated in such a manner only fueled Kagura’s ire.

"Kagura, what’s up?"

"Don’t fuck with me! Don’t you give a damn if I die?"

"I’d heard that it was a gateway which the living cannot pass," he reflected, completely ignoring her question. "But I didn’t know the meaning behind it."

Kagura stifled a growl. _So in other words, you sent me in there neither knowing nor caring whether I would come back alive, just so you could learn about the gateway._

"Fucking brat," she snarled, raising her fan. Her arm moved forward a few centimeters, then stopped and hung there, still pointing up at the sky. She ground her teeth together for several seconds, glaring at her oh-so-smug adversary, then swore aloud and snapped her fan closed. _Damn it all…if he wasn’t in that girl’s body, I’d slice him to pieces._ But she didn’t think Inuyasha would appreciate that very much. Not for the first time, she wondered what the hell had come over her the other night, when she’d promised to look out for Kagome. Logically, it had everything to do with staying on Inuyasha’s good side, so hopefully the hanyou wouldn’t feel driven to hunt her down and kill her if they both survived Naraku’s death. But if she were being truly honest with herself, she knew it was much more than that. _Great, an incarnation of the most evil pile of scum on the planet is growing a conscience. That’s pretty fucking hilarious._

"A wise move, Kagura," Hakago stated, twisting Kagome’s voice into a sinister tone. He sat facing her now, regarding her menacingly. She gasped as he allowed his barrier to glow darkly for a moment, before becoming invisible once again. _What?! How is that possible?_

"You seem surprised, Kagura," he observed mockingly. "Didn’t expect me to be able to maintain a barrier? Don’t be a fool. This girl’s spiritual energy has locked itself away, so there is nothing to prevent me from using all of the power I was born with. Hence, I’m not someone the likes of you can kill.

"Besides," he said, changing to a lighter, but still condescending tone. "We both want the same thing, do we not?"

"What?"

"Both of us desire Naraku’s death."

"Wh-what makes you think I want that?" Kagura hastily demanded, suspicious of a trap.

"Kukuku, Kagura, Kagura, Kagura. I have access to all of Kagome’s memories. How odd that she and her friends were _sure_ that you observed Inuyasha’s time of weakness, and yet even months later, Naraku seems to be unaware of it…"

"Shut your mouth, you little—"

"Shut my mouth? As you have shut yours? I wonder what Naraku would do if he learned that you’ve withheld such vital information from him."

Kagura grimaced, forcibly tamping down her panic. Hakago’s words seemed to indicate that he hadn’t informed Naraku of her betrayal yet, though he’d had plenty of opportunity to do so since taking Kagome’s form.

"If you have Kagome’s memories," she snapped, "then you’ve kept things hidden from him as well."

"Have I?" he replied with a chuckle. "I cannot use this girl’s miko power. Perhaps some of her memories are also beyond my reach. Perhaps I have been working diligently to gain access to those protected parts of her mind. For all Naraku knows, that is."

Kagura felt her spirits sink. Naraku might believe Hakago’s lie if push came to shove, and he might not. But he surely trusted the infant more than he trusted her. If Hakago told him that she had kept Inuyasha’s time of weakness to herself, she was a dead woman no matter what she said about her accuser. She was stuck, completely at the mercy of not only Naraku, but of a younger ‘sibling’ as well.

"But don’t worry, Kagura," he told her, obviously amused. "So long as you behave yourself, I have no intention of enlightening Naraku as to your betrayal. As I said, we both want the same thing. Follow my orders, and I’ll grant you the freedom which you seek."

Kagura studied her would-be master, the sly grin on Kagome’s features sending a chill down her spine. She knew better than to take this infant at his word. He was just like Naraku, through and through. Even if everything went according to his plans, he would never grant her freedom. And if he did, there would be some horrible catch. His actions today provided all the evidence she needed not to trust him. _We want the same thing, but you’re willing to sacrifice me to get it._

Still, she nodded her acceptance to Hakago’s proposal before turning to leave, grateful that he let her go without further comment. What choice did she have? Refuse and wait for Naraku to crush her heart in his grubby hands? Death was not the freedom she sought. So she would follow Hakago’s orders, even let him consider her an ally. But she would never trust him, or stop seeking a way to destroy both him and Naraku. Only when both of them were burning in the fiery inferno of hell would she be truly free.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – So I got tired of writing ‘the infant’ over and over again. A character I’m doing POV for needs to have a name! Hakago is a cross between Hakudoshi (which that half of him later chooses in canon) and Akago (which is the term for ‘infant’ that he’s commonly known by). Not especially creative, but I think it works. I didn’t want to call him Hakudoshi because that would be confusing.


	26. The Next World

Inuyasha marched along at the head of the group, his visage twisted into a perpetual scowl. The cautious optimism he’d felt after his conversation with Kagura had long since dissipated. Instead of becoming all depressed and mopey about it, however, now he was just angry. He had always been determined to get Kagome back, but he supposed the more fervid demeanor was an improvement. Shippou had quietly commented that he was behaving like his old self again, which was definitely a good thing. His ‘old self’ had never allowed any of his friends to die. As for the rather pitiful man-shaped blob he’d regressed to after Kagome’s abduction…he sincerely hoped he’d seen the last of that sighing weakling. What was done, was done; there was no sense in dwelling on the past. He would move forward with confidence and determination as he always did, never doubting that he would reach his goal.

It did, however, seem that it would take a little longer to achieve his aim than he’d thought just a couple days ago. _Because my freaking useless vassal decided to be useless yet again._ It wasn’t really Myouga’s fault, Inuyasha knew, but the flea was a convenient scapegoat. He was still tagging along somewhere, probably with Kirara, wisely keeping his distance from his volatile master. They’d found him at Totosai’s place as hoped, but things had gone downhill from there. First when Myouga informed them that the black pearl no longer existed, and again when he led them to Housenki’s lair, only to discover that the pearl’s maker was recently deceased and his idiot son wouldn’t have any more of them ready for at least a hundred years. So now they were officially back to square one when it came to gaining passage to the next world. If there was a silver lining, it was that Naraku must be in a very similar position. From here, it would be a race to see who could cross the finish line first, with neither side having a significant head start over the other.

So obviously there was still reason for haste, though once again the Inu-gang didn’t really know what they were looking for. Mostly they traveled between human settlements, since villagers were usually willing to tell them if anything strange was going on in the surrounding area. Kirara had just finished her daily run, carrying Miroku and Sango so the group could make better time, and was resting now. But when Inuyasha stopped dead in his tracks and announced that he smelled human blood, and a large quantity at that, she transformed again and they set off at top speed.

"Another youkai attack," Shippou observed sadly when they arrived on the scene.

"No, this one’s different," Inuyasha replied, stating aloud what the other adults of the group had also realized. These people had not been torn apart and eaten, like the unfortunate inhabitants of the other villages they’d come across. Instead, though their bodies remained whole, the skin was shrunken grotesquely. Someone or something had sucked every drop of blood from these poor people, and left the rest to the scavengers.

"We must investigate this," Miroku declared solemnly, "and stop whoever is doing it."

Inuyasha nodded in agreement. A village being attacked by youkai was nothing unusual, especially since the collapse of Mount Hakurei’s barrier. But the manner in which these particular villagers had been killed was highly suspicious. It could be just some random bloodsucking youkai, but there was at least a reasonable chance that this occurrence was linked to Naraku. And if it repeated itself, that likelihood only increased as far as Inuyasha was concerned.

It did. After burying the dead from the first village, they came across several more settlements over the next couple days which had been attacked in the same manner. It seemed that the mysterious perpetrator was systematically hitting every village in the area. So when the Inu-gang finally found one which had so far escaped the carnage, they determined to remain there and try to catch the bastard in the act. They did not have long to wait. The bird-like youkai descended upon the village in waves soon after dark, and when the first wave was decimated by the Kaze no Kizu, the second manifested their bodies into flaming missiles and targeted the huts, sending the panicked villagers fleeing outside. It took substantial contributions from Miroku and Sango to protect the now exposed humans, but they managed. The situation was under control until Naraku’s saimyoushou suddenly appeared, forcing the monk to close his kazaana. Fortunately, the bird youkai also paused in their onslaught as their master arrived on the scene. Inuyasha didn’t bother trying to suppress his grin. If the saimyoushou were here, then he was definitely in the right place.

"Do not smirk at me, hanyou," his new opponent commanded, taking his obvious pleasure the wrong way. She was a female youkai with jet black hair and red eyes, who might have been beautiful if not for the cruel expression marring her features. "I am the great Abi-hime. You should avert your eyes and kneel before me."

"Keh, all I see is some stuck-up youkai bitch with a thing for sucking human blood," Inuyasha retorted. "And she’s a slave to Naraku too."

"Hmph, so you’re Naraku’s enemy, eh? Well, I don’t really care about some petty feud between hanyou. But you’ve killed my birds. Prepare to die!"

She underwent a partial transformation then, her hands shifting into fierce-looking talons, though whether that was as far as she could go or she had purposely stopped there, Inuyasha couldn’t say. He could tell that she underestimated him, as most full-youkai did. But he had slain many enemies stronger than her in the past, often while heavily wounded. He probably could have blown her away with a single swing of Tetsusaiga, but killing her was not his goal. This self-proclaimed hime had some connection with Naraku, and he was going to find out what it was, even if he had to strangle it out of her. So his objective was not to kill, but to injure. And since Tetsusaiga’s destructive power was ill-suited to the task, he would have to use his claws instead.

"Make sure the villagers escape!" he called to his friends, dodging the flaming youki Abi-hime fired at him and darting away from the village.

"Fleeing already, hanyou?" she taunted, pursuing him exactly as he’d hoped. If she thought he was a weak hanyou, he would play into that narrative to try to get close to her. A similar strategy had almost worked against Jakotsu, when he’d been reduced to human form by Mount Hakurei’s holy barrier, and this time he would pull it off. When the time was right, he would spring his trap. In the meantime, he continued to dodge her youki using his nonvisual senses.

"You’ll never escape me, you coward," she snarled, sounding increasingly frustrated by his continued evasion. "Face me like a man!"

Inuyasha made no reply, not wanting to accidentally spoil the ruse with his big mouth. He did, however, allow one of Abi-hime’s youki attacks to strike close to his left side. His fire-rat protected him from any damage, but she didn’t need to know that. Instead, what she glimpsed was her intended victim moving with a fresh limp after a near miss. Inuyasha could practically see her victorious smirk. For the next thirty seconds or so, he eluded her rapid-fire attacks, until finally another near miss sent him sprawling to the dirt with a yelp that was only partially forced. But again, his fire-rat limited the damage, and his body was far tougher than this wench gave him credit for. Nevertheless, when he stood to face her, he did so shakily while leaning most of his weight on his right leg. He growled and glared up at her, as he imagined a cornered and wounded animal might.

"At last you realize your position," she observed smugly. "Now die!"

She sent another blast of youki his way, this one more powerful than the others, and Inuyasha had to bite his tongue to keep from smirking. He waited, as if physically unable to move and resolved to death, until just before the imaginary point of no return. Then he launched himself into motion, darting forward as Abi-hime’s youki devastated the earth behind him.

"What?!" she cried, but was too shocked to react to the new threat. In a flash he had closed the distance and leapt up to her level, claws raised and glowing with golden youki. Again, he could have killed her. Instead, he settled for a raking slash which tore through the guard on her left shoulder and sliced deeply into her torso. She managed a choked gasp as she reeled from the blow, falling a half dozen meters to the ground and landing with a dull thud. She struggled to rise, but was initially unable to do so, as Inuyasha closed in to extract the information he sought.

The situation turned on its head in a heartbeat. Just before he reached her, a three-pronged halberd twirled in from out of nowhere, embedding itself in the ground at her feet. Inuyasha didn’t think much of this until he ran into the barrier. He cried out as his body was engulfed in familiar, malevolent youki, and thrown back several meters to land in a heap. Groaning in pain, he pulled himself into a kneeling position, and glared over to find Abi-hime doing the same. The expression on her face indicated that this turn of events was as much of a surprise to her as it was to him. Her remaining birds were on their way over here, but Inuyasha knew he could tear through the small fry with ease if need be. That halberd, on the other hand, was far more disconcerting. If it possessed the same power as individual who had obviously given it to her, it would make her essentially invulnerable to his attacks. Tetsusaiga had been unable to break Naraku’s barrier at Mount Hakurei, and nothing had happened to change that.

"Who are you?" Abi-hime asked suddenly, and it was clear from her tone that she was wondering why a hanyou was so strong. Inuyasha sensed an opportunity and took it. If physical means weren’t going to work, then perhaps intimidation would get him the information he needed. He stood and drew himself to his full height, gritting his teeth to conceal the pain that action caused.

"I am Inuyasha, brother of the daiyoukai Sesshoumaru and son of the Inu no Taisho," he announced with as regal a bearing as he could muster. Abi-hime shrunk back a bit at this, leading him to assume that she’d heard of his family. Encouraged, he pushed a little harder.

"And this," he declared, slowly drawing Tetsusaiga from its sheath and transforming it spectacularly before her eyes, "is Tetsusaiga, a sword forged from my father’s fang and handed down to me, his only son worthy of wielding it."

Okay, so maybe that was embellishing things a bit. But since Sesshoumaru wasn’t here to contradict him about his own ‘worthiness,’ it was a case of no harm, no foul. And again, the demonstration proved effective, if the way Abi-hime’s eyes followed Tetsusaiga’s blade was any indication.

"I see," she said at last, also rising to her feet. "Many years ago, my mother feuded with the Inu no Taisho, but the conflict was brief and was resolved peacefully. I guess the rumors were true, then. He really did sire a half-breed whelp upon some human wench."

Inuyasha’s spirits sank a bit at that comment. So much for her regarding him as an equal now. _A hanyou is always a hanyou, no matter how strong, or who his father is._ That was a truth he had learned long ago. Still, that she was willing to stand here and converse with him spoke of a certain level of newfound respect, so he decided to try to resolve this peacefully, as his father had done before him.

"The man who gave you that halberd, Naraku…you should be careful around him."

"And why is that?" Abi-hime asked, feigning disinterest.

"He’s a manipulative bastard. He’ll use you and then destroy you when he’s finished. He—"

"Do not concern yourself, Inuyasha," she mocked, spitting out his name. Though at least it was his name, rather than a pejorative term. "I know better than to trust the likes of him."

"Whether you trust him or not, be careful. He’s more powerful than you know."

"Well, this is amusing. A hanyou lecturing the great Abi-hime to beware the power of another hanyou?"

Inuyasha started to speak, then cut himself off and took a deep breath. He’d been on the verge of saying something stupid, like ‘well, this hanyou just kicked your ass!’ That statement or anything similar would have likely ended the conversation. As much as he wanted to teach this stuck-up bitch that he wasn’t inferior to her because of his heritage, there were more important issues at stake here. Kagome’s life hung in the balance.

"Look," he snapped, somehow finding a reserve of patience. "I’m not interested in fighting you. I just want Naraku. Please, tell me what you know about him."

Abi-hime studied him for a moment, then shrugged. "Fine, but there’s not much to tell. He came to me one day, promising to help me gather human blood in exchange for creating a pathway to the next world for him. But don’t worry about him ever getting there; I have no intention of giving that hanyou anything. If he isn’t satisfied with my gratitude, then my mother will devour him."

Inuyasha was disappointed by this news, but he could detect no hint of untruthfulness from Abi-hime. It actually wasn’t surprising that she knew so little; Naraku was crafty enough to tell his pawns exactly what they needed to know to accomplish his objective, and nothing more. At least he could now confirm that her gathering of human blood was intimately related to Naraku’s attempt to forge a pathway to the next world.

Sudden light drew Inuyasha from his musings. Abi-hime had rekindled the flames under her feet, which allowed her flight. It seemed that she was growing tired of a hanyou’s company. Fortunately, Inuyasha had just one more question for her.

"Will you stop collecting human blood?"

"No, I will not," she answered with a menacing sneer. "And if you interfere again, I will kill you. You are strong, for a hanyou. But do not think you will survive a second battle with the great Abi-hime."

She departed, taking her birds with her, and Inuyasha let them go. Tracking them would be nearly impossible, and he needed to rejoin his friends. Not to mention the damage he had suffered from running into Naraku’s barrier. Nothing was broken, but it still hurt like hell, as though the foreign youki had burned his muscles from the inside. His body would probably heal completely in less than a day, but he would prefer to avoid combat until then. Abi-hime and her brood had looked like they were finished marauding for the evening, so it was a good time to rest and recover.

So when Miroku suggested making camp nearby, Inuyasha didn’t object. The monk and taijiya, working with Kirara and even Shippou, had managed to save most of the villagers from the birds. A few had been picked off, but that was to be expected with a battle of this magnitude. Inuyasha could well attest to the difficulty of protecting a group of panicked humans from a swarm of youkai. Next he informed them of what he had learned from Abi-hime, and that they were most likely going to have to face her again in the near future. Defeating her would not be easy, Inuyasha knew, since she carried a halberd which seemed to have been crafted from Naraku’s body. But if she was going to continue to slaughter innocent villagers, all the while gathering blood which the dark hanyou probably intended to use to open a pathway to the next world, they had no choice but to stop her.

Inuyasha felt a prick on his cheek and smacked it, then held open his palm to reveal his parasitic vassal. "And where have you been this whole time, jijii?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

"Inuyasha-sama, what was the name of that woman?!"

The hanyou rolled his eyes at Myouga’s obvious evasion, but let it go. The flea had been a hopeless coward for centuries, and wasn’t likely to change any time soon.

"She called herself Abi-hime. Why, you know her?"

"I have heard of her. She is the daughter of Tekkei, a fierce brute of a daiyoukai who is related to the birds which live in hell. In other words, she has a natural connection to the next world!"

"She does?" Inuyasha wondered, surprised that his vassal had made a useful contribution for a change.

"No wonder Naraku is using them," Sango added. "Is that why they’re gathering human blood?"

Myouga shook his head. "I am not certain. Logically, human blood should be unable to assist with opening a pathway. The next world is a _youkai_ graveyard, after all." The group pondered this mystery in silence for a few moments, before Inuyasha spoke up.

"If not human blood…what about Tekkei’s blood?"

Myouga’s eyes went wide. "Do you think Naraku intends to kill Tekkei?"

"I can’t see any other reason why he would need them. If Tekkei has a connection to the next world, where _dead_ youkai go, then how else would Naraku make a path? Abi-hime said they won’t make one for him willingly."

"I see…it makes sense, Inuyasha-sama. Should Abi-hime and Tekkei be warned?"

"No," he replied immediately. "We don’t need to stop Naraku from opening the pathway. We just need to make sure we’re there when he does, or make our own."

Inuyasha felt a little cruel for saying that, but it was the truth. Preventing Naraku from forging a path to the next world got them no closer to getting Kagome back. And besides, it wasn’t as though Abi-hime would heed their warning anyway, since she severely underestimated Naraku because he was a hanyou. Nobody could say that the human-murdering bird youkai didn’t deserve it either. Looking at each of his friends in turn, he saw that they felt much the same way as he did, somewhat uncomfortable but resolved to do what was necessary.

"Tomorrow, we’ll head in the direction the birds fled," Inuyasha declared gravely. "We’ll find that damn nest and exterminate Tekkei ourselves. And if we meet Abi-hime before that, I’ll kill her."

The rest of the evening was a quiet affair, with each companion lost in their own thoughts. Inuyasha found sleep elusive, as anticipation surged through his body. They were so close, he could feel it. He would hold that final jewel shard in his hand very soon, or die trying to obtain it.

* * *

Inuyasha kicked his speed up a notch as he sprinted through the empty plains. He didn’t even need to try to detect the birds’ scent anymore; it was thick in the very air that he breathed. They were getting close, and not only to the birds nest. For intermixed with the pungent avian odors was another, much fainter but equally nauseating. Naraku was already at the nest.

The events which had led the Inu-gang to this point had been set into motion less than an hour ago. By a stroke of good fortune, their direction of travel had taken them close to a certain human castle, which Abi-hime had chosen for her next target. It was probably unusual for her flock to be active in broad daylight, or to attack such a large and well-defended settlement, but they had likely been driven to make up for returning empty-handed the night before. Indeed, by the time Inuyasha and his friends arrived on the scene, the bodies of dozens of birds lay on the ground next to their human victims. But the sheer number and ferocity of the attackers had won out, and few humans remained standing. Miroku and Sango did what they could, and Inuyasha briefly dueled with Abi-hime. But she withdrew as soon as her birds retreated to safety, heavily laden with human blood. Inuyasha had tracked them all the way here, as the birds had made no attempt to conceal their scent. Either Abi-hime was unaware of their pursuit, which was unlikely, or she no longer feared the discovery of her nest. And now with Naraku involved, Inuyasha wondered what he would find when they finally arrived.

The answer came in the form of a giant avian figure suddenly looming before them, spewing fire which Kirara was fortunately quick enough to avoid. Inuyasha faltered in his step and was nearly engulfed by the flames, as his nose detected a scent which delivered a shock to his system. It had previously been masked by much stronger odors, but at such a short distance, this cherished aroma revealed itself to him. _Kagome…she’s here?!_

"Inuyasha!" Abi-hime called, seemingly pleased to see him. "Did the half-breed son of the Inu no Taisho come to die as well?"

"Where’s Naraku?!" he demanded, his heart in his throat. He didn’t think Naraku was careless enough to lose his precious shard-detector to the likes of these youkai—he still needed her to find the final shard in the next world, after all—but one could never be sure.

"Hmph, that small-fry Naraku has already croaked."

 _"Kukuku, he’s in my stomach,"_ came the disembodied voice of the huge bird which had flamed them, obviously Tekkei. Inuyasha grimaced, realizing what the youkai before him did not. Evidently, having a large brain did not make Tekkei intelligent. And as Naraku’s tendrils shot up through the top of her skull, killing her instantly, Inuyasha reflected that at least her stupidity hadn’t caused her to suffer. Or Abi-hime for that matter, who soon shared her mother’s fate. And, he was relieved to note, Naraku’s victory most certainly meant that Kagome was fine. She was probably hiding nearby, out of sight.

Naraku turned to regard them stonily when he had finished with the two bird youkai. For once, his expression lacked its customary smugness, as though he hadn’t anticipated or desired for them to be here. But he quickly recovered his confidence, adopting an amused grin which was in no way forced. As if he had realized that perhaps this departure from his plan might turn out for the best.

"Kukuku, you lot arrived just in time. To witness the opening of the pathway to the next world, that is."

With that, he swung his razor sharp tendril and neatly severed Tekkei’s head. The body collapsed, a veritable river of blood immediately flowing from the neck, down the rocky hillside.

"Go, Kagura!" Naraku shouted, and from the other side of the mountain, the wind sorceress emerged on her feather. But it was not Kagura who drew Inuyasha’s attention; that distinction belonged to the individual seated behind her. Dressed in a long, flowing kimono with her raven hair tied back, Kagome now exhibited the same fierce warrior’s aura as her counterpart. For Inuyasha, it was an indescribable relief simply to gaze upon her again, despite the foreign entity behind her eyes and the malicious grin twisting her features. He inhaled deeply, taking an even better sample of her scent, and experienced real joy for the first time in weeks. Their child was still alive in her womb.

Then she soared past, rapidly shrinking in the distance as she and Kagura followed the flow of blood to its unknown destination. Inuyasha moved to pursue but was forced to dodge the tentacles which otherwise would have pierced him through the chest.

"My apologies, Inuyasha," Naraku mocked, "but this is as far as any of you bastards go."

He lashed out with his tentacles again, but this time Inuyasha was ready. The Kaze no Kizu decimated every portion of Naraku’s body which was outside his barrier, but could not penetrate the opaque shield.

"Heh, futile," the dark hanyou remarked, capturing Tetsusaiga’s youki with his barrier and sending it spiraling outwards in all directions. By the time Inuyasha recovered from his latest round of evasive maneuvers, more of Naraku’s tentacles were headed his way. He cursed inwardly, knowing that time was running short. Naraku only needed to delay him for a few more seconds. The flow of blood from Tekkei’s neck had already slowed to a relative trickle; the gateway to the next world would soon close. He raised Tetsusaiga, prepared to burst through this time or perish in the attempt.

"Kazaana!" Miroku shouted from above, the void in his hand immediately drawing the pieces of Naraku’s flesh away. It created a momentary opening for his friend, but at what cost? Naraku’s flesh contained miasma, and he had already deployed the saimyoushou. Inuyasha leapt into action immediately, not wishing for Miroku to keep his kazaana open a moment longer than absolutely necessary. The winds died abruptly as soon as he sprinted past Naraku and into the waning stream.

"Houshi-sama!" he heard Sango cry, real fear in her tone. Inuyasha squeezed his eyes shut against a surge of emotion, but lowered his head and maintained his stride. Miroku had done what he felt was necessary, placing himself in great personal peril so Kagome could be saved. All Inuyasha could do was pray for his survival, and take advantage of the opportunity the monk’s sacrifice had provided.

Naraku cackled behind him, seemingly amused by the change in circumstances. "Go ahead, Inuyasha, follow Kagome to the next world. She will return, but you will not!"

Inuyasha refused to feel any doubt at those words. He would not fail. He and his friends had sacrificed too much for this opportunity. He would return with the final jewel shard and Kagome, or not at all.

The end of the blood river was just ahead now, forming a vortex of tormented souls. It was fading, shrinking before his eyes. He stretched out his arm, straining to reach it with all of his might…

* * *

Inuyasha fell, a burst of exhilaration running through his system, as he allowed himself a brief moment to bask in his success. This place looked the same as it did in his memories, down to every detail of his father’s massive remains which loomed up before him. Kagura and Kagome were nowhere to be seen, and he couldn’t pick up their scents. But he would find them, of that he had no doubt.

He grunted as he landed unexpectedly on the back of one of the skeletal birds which inhabited this place. He’d noticed it the first time he came here—these creatures seemed perfectly willing to ferry visitors anywhere they wanted to go. With nowhere else to start, he urged it in the general direction of his father’s grave, while he scanned the surrounding area for any sign of his quarry.

As his attention was elsewhere, he almost didn’t see the projectiles which nearly pierced him through. He only had time to make a desperate dive off of the bird as it was torn apart by what looked like spears of some kind. Another bird caught him several dozen meters lower in altitude, and when the spears came again he was ready to deflect them with Tetsusaiga. _Dammit, what’s going on? These spears look like they’re made from diamond. And they’re coming from Oyaji’s grave!_ He urged the bird closer the massive skeleton, determined to get to the bottom of this. His question of whether this suspicious activity had anything to do with the Shikon no Tama was answered immediately.

"You’re not dead, are you?" a voice asked, and it took Inuyasha a moment to locate the source. The owner was a skull, surrounded by a frill of diamonds, embedded in his father’s torso. "After the Shikon fragment…a grave robber, eh?"

"Who the hell are you?!" Inuyasha demanded, flying closer still. "And what are you doing sticking yourself into my Oyaji’s belly?!"

"Your Oyaji?" the diamond youkai repeated, growing a neck so he could raise his head and examine Inuyasha more closely. "What’s your name, boy?"

"Inuyasha."

"And when you were born, what was inserted into your right eye?"

"A black pearl which allowed me passage to this world, so I could claim this," Inuyasha answered, holding up Tetsusaiga. "You’re not…Housenki, are you?"

"Hmph. Even if you are the Inu no Taisho’s son, you have no business here, as you have already claimed your father’s heirloom. Leave this place, and do not return."

"Gladly," Inuyasha retorted. "As soon as you hand over the Shikon fragment you mentioned earlier."

"I will not hand it over," Housenki declared firmly. "It was the fragment’s intent to come here, and I will honor its wishes."

"Wha—you idiot! Respecting the intent of some inanimate object? How about you honor the wishes of the son of the damn Inu no Taisho?!"

"I don’t care who comes to take it," Housenki roared, pulling more of his body outside of the Inu no Taisho’s belly. He formed a roughly humanoid shape now, complete with a torso and two massive arms. "I won’t hand it over. The son of the Inu no Taisho should know better. Against you, I’ll show no mercy!"

True to his word, Housenki swung a huge diamond-studded forearm at Inuyasha, the sheer power behind the blow easily sufficient to impale the hanyou on the meter-long spikes if it found its mark. The great youkai’s movements were, however, fairly slow, even for a creature its size. So Inuyasha had no trouble dodging the attempt, urging his bird to soar higher. Then he leapt off, plummeting about a dozen meters and swinging Tetsusaiga at Housenki’s exposed appendage. Unfortunately, though a piercing _clang_ rang out at impact, the hard diamond held firm. Next Inuyasha had to leap to avoid another round of sharp spears fired from his opponent’s mouth, as he retreated off the retracting arm and onto his bird once more.

He then attempted to pierce the tough armour with the Kaze no Kizu, to no avail. _Damn, I can’t even scratch him!_ And Housenki didn’t attack with youki, so the Bakuryuuha was out of the question. His armour was even tougher than Ryukotsusei’s, so Inuyasha couldn’t be sure that Tetsusaiga’s ‘ultimate technique’ would work even if he could employ it. More and more it seemed that taking the jewel shard by force was going to be impossible, especially since he couldn’t see where it was located in Housenki’s body. Running out of ideas, he decided to try to reason with the big brute.

"Housenki, you don’t seem like an evil youkai. But what you’re doing is wrong. The Shikon no Tama needs to be returned to the world of the living and purified. Otherwise, the cycle of death and destruction will never stop."

"Hmph. It is true that the Shikon no Tama has destroyed countless lives. It is also true that if the evil being who possesses the remainder of the jewel gets his hands on the fragment in my possession, the suffering of innocents will only grow worse. That is why this fragment asked me to take it here. And that is why I will never allow it to return to the world of the living." Here Housenki paused briefly, his eyes shining almost thoughtfully. "You are a hanyou, yet you do not seem to be driven by greed or lust for power. But I have given you my answer. If you persist in your efforts to take the fragment from me, I will kill you. Leave this place, and do not return."

"I can’t do that," Inuyasha replied grimly.

"Then you leave me no choice!"

"Heh, so the old geezer is stubborn, eh Inuyasha?"

Delivered in Kagome’s voice, that comment drew Inuyasha’s full attention, as he turned to face her without a care for the rest of the world. It was lucky that the new arrival had distracted Housenki as well, or the old youkai could have ended the distracted hanyou’s life then and there. Kagome hovered, projecting a barrier remarkably similar to Naraku’s and levitating in the same way. Kagura drifted on air currents off to the side, her fan held at the ready. But Inuyasha had eyes only for Kagome. She wore an amused grin, as though genuinely enjoying the spectacle unfolding before her, puppets dancing on their strings. It was further evidence that her body was under the control of another, and Inuyasha quickly shook his head and tore his gaze away. Hearing her voice again had thrown him into a bit of a tailspin, but he would remain focused on the task at hand from now on.

"Would you like me to make it a little easier for you, Inuyasha?" Kagome— _Hakago_ asked derisively. "The Shikon fragment should be right about…here!" he cried, having drawn Kagome’s bow and fired an arrow with practiced hands. The projectile clattered off of Housenki’s back, doing no damage because it carried no spiritual energy. Inuyasha’s eyes widened in understanding. _I get it. Hakago can’t use Kagome’s spiritual energy, but he can still use the power he was born with._ And as long as that was the case, then he could be confident that Kagome’s mind could still be saved.

"Insolent wench!" Housenki growled. "You are a servant of the evil one. Die!"

Panicking, Inuyasha swung Tetsusaiga and launched a Kaze no Kizu. But it was too late to stop the diamond barrage Housenki released against Hakago. Inuyasha held his breath, unsure if Naraku’s barrier would stand up to such an attack. Whatever the answer was, Hakago was obviously taking no chances. He soared away rapidly with his barrier, a strong gust of wind from Kagura helping to push the diamond shards further off course. Then the Kaze no Kizu struck, temporarily engulfing Housenki in Tetsusaiga’s youki. Inuyasha knew he couldn’t allow another attempt on Kagome’s life, and saw an opportunity to deal a critical blow.

With a mighty leap, he crossed the empty expanse and landed on Housenki’s massive shoulder. From there, it was only a few quick steps to his back, where Inuyasha smashed Tetsusaiga into the exact spot where Kagome’s arrow had struck, unleashing the Kaze no Kizu at the same time. Despite the combination of incredibly destructive forces, he felt no give under his sword, and when the youki dissipated, nothing had changed.

"A futile effort," Housenki declared. "You may have found the Shikon fragment, but you will never reach it."

Inuyasha gritted his teeth, blinking back frustrated tears. To have come so far, fought so many enemies, and possibly even lost a dear friend, only to discover that their efforts were futile all along? His mind rebelled at the idea, as he reared back and slammed Tetsusaiga into the diamond armour again and again. Each time he found some new reserve of determination and intensified his efforts, grunting with despair and exertion. And each time, the armour held. Tetsusaiga howled in pain, as cracking sounds reached his ears, quickly becoming more and more intense. Inuyasha no longer cared. This was the decisive moment, the moment when he would determine whether or not Kagome had a chance to survive this ordeal. Either Housenki’s armour would break…or Tetsusaiga would fail, and his body soon after.

"Fool! You will shatter your father’s heirloom before you overcome my armour."

"If I can’t…save Kagome…then nothing else matters!"

He drew back his sword for what he sensed would be the final time, one way or another. He channeled everything into that last effort—his guilt, his heartache, his longing. Everything he felt for her, everything she made him feel with just a smile or a friendly embrace, all of his hopes and dreams, even those which had remained concealed to him until that moment. He poured everything into that final endeavor, the unadulterated love blazing in his heart surging through his sword and causing Tetsusaiga to explode with renewed vigor. The world went white at impact, and Inuyasha stumbled back. But he could feel it through his grip on the sword’s hilt—Tetsusaiga was still whole, and it was buried deep in Housenki’s back.

"Enough!" the old youkai boomed, swatting Inuyasha aside with a great swing of his massive arm. The hanyou emitted a choked gasp as he fell, plummeting into the abyss. Stunned as he was, he could only gaze up at Kagome as she shrank into the distance before his eyes, Hakago’s barrier still shimmering darkly. Then something happened which he was temporarily helpless to make sense of. A kind of portal opened up behind her, a familiar figure materializing at her side. The newcomer’s barrier gradually emerged from the portal, as Kagome’s retracted into it. Within moments, Kagome had vanished entirely, and Hakago’s master had taken her place.

"Ugh!" Inuyasha groaned as he landed on a rock ledge with bone-shattering force. He closed his eyes for a moment, fighting the pull of unconsciousness, and the despair which threatened to consume him. Kagome was gone, but all was not lost. That Naraku was here meant that something crucial was about to take place. As his brain recovered from the trauma it had recently undergone, he realized what had happened. _Naraku used Hakago’s barrier to come to this world himself. As long as someone using his barrier is in this world, he can create a connection to the living one._ Presumably, he and Hakago could switch places at any time, so long as one of them existed in each world. _And now Naraku’s come here to claim the final Shikon fragment!_

Inuyasha gritted his teeth against the pain as he rolled over and pushed himself to his feet. He staggered, holding his head as sudden dizziness assaulted him. But it passed quickly, thanks to his youkai blood. Housenki’s blow combined with the fall had beaten him up pretty badly, but this was far from over. His sword was also in rough shape, but crucially it was still clutched in his right hand, and responded when he called upon it to transform. His heart clenched at the damage to his beloved Tetsusaiga, cracks of every shape and size running along its blade. _I’m sorry, Tetsusaiga_. But the sword pulsed once almost reassuringly, and Inuyasha knew it approved of his actions.

"Just a little more, Tetsusaiga!"

He leapt onto the back of one of the skeletal birds drifting lazily nearby, mentally ordering it to ascend as quickly as possible. He was not disappointed, as the battlefield grew rapidly closer. As he watched, Housenki fired diamond spears through Naraku’s chest, which managed to pass through the latter’s barrier as if it didn’t exist. But this didn’t faze the dark hanyou, who already had one of his tendrils plunged into Housenki’s back. The great youkai now pulsed with evil energy, his once pristine body turning black as night. _Shit, Naraku’s using his portion of the jewel to corrupt Housenki’s fragment!_ And due to the damage he and Tetsusaiga had caused, the old youkai seemed to have no strength left to resist.

Naraku noticed Inuyasha’s approach then, cackling as he gazed down at the inu-hanyou with an insane glint in his eyes. Before Inuyasha could destroy Naraku’s tendrils, the dark hanyou finally succeeded in withdrawing the now polluted Shikon fragment from Housenki’s back. Then, since his tendrils were already wrapped around the great youkai, he wrenched and tore off Housenki’s head, flinging it at Inuyasha with incredible speed. Inuyasha tensed his battered legs to dive away, sensing that it was going to be a close call, but also knowing that if he failed to avoid the attack, he and Kagome were both as good as dead. Naraku would have the completed Shikon no Tama, and would have no use for her anymore.

"Cut me, boy."

The deep, booming voice resonated through his mind, as time seemed to slow to a crawl. _What?_ he demanded. _Who are you?_

 _"Cut me,"_ the voice repeated, and finally Inuyasha recognized it. Housenki, whose head was currently barreling towards him at deadly velocity, was telling him to cut him apart with Tetsusaiga rather than dodging. Inuyasha had no reason to trust the foolish old youkai, who had failed to see reason until it was too late. But the sincerity and conviction in his tone convinced the hanyou that it would be a tremendous mistake to ignore his request. So instead of leaping out of harm’s way, he gripped Tetsusaiga’s hilt in both hands and swung with all of his might.

At first, he was sure the sword was going to shatter. But Tetsusaiga’s screams of agony lasted for only a moment, and as Inuyasha squinted his eyes shut against the spray of tiny diamond shards peppering his body, the sword’s vocalizations shifted into more of a throaty hum. When he opened his eyes, Tetsusaiga was whole again, sparkling in the light.

_"You have proven yourself worthy of my power, son of the Inu no Taisho. Use it well."_

"Thank you," Inuyasha said aloud, realizing that this was likely the last time he was going to be able to speak to Housenki. Whatever the old youkai had done, he appreciated it. Now, he could face his true enemy with a real chance of victory.

"You’re too late, Inuyasha," Naraku declared smugly. "Your sword may be fully healed, but you still won’t be able to break my barrier."

"We’ll see, you bastard," Inuyasha snarled, summoning Tetsusaiga’s youki, which swirled around him, whipping his hair rhythmically.

"Kukuku, go ahead and try it. When you fail, I will leave you here in this wasteland to rot for all eternity. I will let you imagine how much Kagome will suffer before I finally grant her a merciful death. I will—"

Inuyasha had heard enough. It didn’t matter if his previous attempts to break Naraku’s barrier had ended in failure. He knew, beyond any shadow of a doubt, that this time would be different. This time, he would overcome Naraku. A name floated to him from some corner of his mind, a memento from a new ally, and he shouted it to the heavens as he swung his sword.

"Kongousouha!"

Despite his confidence, Inuyasha was still awed by the power which Tetsusaiga unleashed. Countless diamond spears, lancing through the air in a great swath, tearing through Naraku’s barrier and slicing his body to ribbons. Even the dark hanyou’s face had been split apart, both halves wearing expressions of fear and wonder. Inuyasha was disappointed but not surprised when the disparate pieces of Naraku’s flesh began swirling around each other. His body could reform because his detached heart was safely back in the living world. Inuyasha would’ve attacked again anyway, but a tiny glimmer among the flesh drew his attention. _The final Shikon fragment!_

The portal opened behind Naraku, the dark hanyou attempting to flee with his prize. Inuyasha soared upward, his avian steed racing to prevent disaster until finally, he judged the distance was correct and leapt with a mighty heave of his legs. Naraku’s tendril reached for the jewel shard, reforming as its tip drew closer and closer to its target. Inuyasha stretched out his hand…

His lungs seized up the instant his fingers closed around the shard. He curled inwardly, as if to shield himself from the evil energy invading his mind, pulsing through his body. _Wha…what’s happening?_ A brutal wave of feral heat tore through him, setting his nerves aflame. It was different from anything he’d ever experienced before, and yet… _Shit! The corrupted shard is…is…_ He growled in agony, red bleeding into his vision as his fangs and claws lengthened. Dimly he felt his body land on something hard and bony, a cruel voice drifting to him from a seemingly great distance.

"That’s it, Inuyasha. Surrender to the corruption of the Shikon no Tama. You can wander this graveyard as a mindless animal for the rest of your miserable existence."

Inuyasha lacked the mental capacity to understand these words. His world began and ended with his heartbeat, as every throb thundered through his skull. Had he possessed the ability of higher thought, he might have reflected how different this was from his prior transformations, particularly the last one during the battle against Ginkotsu. There, his youkai side had emerged of its own volition in response to a threat to his life. Here, however, an outside force was pulling the wild part of him to the surface, while increasing its savagery to the point of insanity. A void loomed before him, and Inuyasha sensed that if he fell into its tranquil depths, there would be no going back.

A different kind of warmth surged through his being, this one soothing, easing the pressure on his mind just enough to delay the inevitable collapse. _Tet…Tetsusaiga._ His sword was calling its master, the hanyou it had fought and bonded with, and the true Inuyasha responded. But Tetsusaiga’s intervention was not going to be enough to save him. The dark power of the Shikon no Tama intensified, perhaps as Naraku floated closer with his already polluted portion of the jewel. Inuyasha nearly broke under the strain, his head ready to explode with the effort of resisting. He had never suffered so much in his entire life. He wanted to surrender to that peaceful oblivion, to put an end to it all. But Tetsusaiga had reminded him why he had to fight on, no matter how much it hurt. Of how much he had to lose.

There was a name. He knew it existed, a name and a matching face which would save him. Someone who meant so much to him, that he would fight the Kami themselves just to be with her. But as the pervasive influence of the corrupt jewel continued its assault, pressing inexorably into the resilient corner of his mind, her identity eluded him. Then he was falling, descending once more into the void where nothing existed, not even…

_Kagome._

Her face swam before his mind’s eye, blurry at first. But his heart clenched at the sight of the mere outline of her smiling visage, raw emotion surging forth to push back the darkness just slightly. And as the image slowly cleared, Inuyasha remembered why she was the only one who could save him from himself. She had been doing it since the day they first met. He allowed pure passion flow through him, overwhelming love and longing which bathed his consciousness in light. Time circled endlessly inside his mind, and he might have spent seconds or days waging war deep within himself. But gradually he drove back the jewel’s blackness, rallying around the one thing which made his life worth living. His Kagome, the girl who made all the suffering worthwhile.

Blinking his eyes open was a surreal experience. He found himself staring down at a different sort of abyss, this one with clouds floating below him over rocky cliffs. He was also moving slightly, as his avian platform hovered in the light breeze caressing his cheeks. Cheeks which surely still bore the markings of his youkai transformation, as he could sense that his fangs and claws had not returned to their normal length. Oddly, this caused him no alarm. He was in control of himself once more. Not complete control—the evil energy still pressed against his consciousness—but it was no longer strong enough to penetrate his defenses. He was a full-youkai in body, but a hanyou in mind. And judging by its joyous pulsing, Tetsusaiga recognized his true heart happily.

"What?!" he heard Naraku exclaim as he lurched to his feet. The dark hanyou hovered above him, his body and barrier fully reformed, only a few meters separating them. Cracking a smirk which was more than a little feral, Inuyasha determined to ensure that his enemy did not remain so undamaged for long. A fresh Kongousouha at point-blank range decimated Naraku, slicing him up even more finely than the previous one. He still began to pull himself back together, but this time Inuyasha was not deterred.

"Naraku," he snarled viciously, his tone downright predatory. "This Shikon fragment…is _mine._ If you want it…bring Kagome here…and free her from your infant’s spell. Otherwise…stick around…and I’ll slice you into so many pieces…that it’ll take you _years_ to put yourself back together. And…I’ll fucking _enjoy_ it."

Inuyasha drank in the sudden fear which colored Naraku’s visage, though perhaps he had overdone it a bit with the savagery, not that he could really help it in his current state. Instead of seriously considering his proposal, Naraku opened his portal and retreated through, leaving no trace of himself behind. Inuyasha immediately collapsed to his knees, a tremendous weight lifting from his shoulders as the corrupt, nearly-completed Shikon no Tama departed from this world. Without its corrosive influence, the single shard still clutched in his hand began to lighten. And as his full-youkai features faded, leaving him hanyou in both body and mind, Inuyasha held the shard up before his eyes. It wasn’t nearly as pure as it would be in Kagome’s hands, but neither was it about to possess him. He was a good person, and the jewel was feeding off that at the moment, with no strong outside influences around.

Inuyasha grinned wryly and shook his head. _All that trouble, for such a little thing._ But it had been worth it. As long as he had this shard, he held a bargaining chip for Kagome’s life. For Naraku to kill her now would be a tremendous risk on his part. There was nothing to stop Inuyasha from hiding the jewel in some secure place only he knew the location of, pending her release. He didn’t plan on doing that, but it was an option open to him. And if he did hide the shard, Naraku could spend centuries searching for it fruitlessly without a reliable way to detect it. Hopefully, the dark hanyou would instead decide to accept his proposal and make the trade. Even if Naraku completed the jewel, Inuyasha was confident that he and his friends could defeat him, as long as Kagome was with them. Besides, getting her back was the most important objective which he had ever known. Keeping the final shard from Naraku had only been a means toward that end. Hopefully an end he would be reaching very soon. _Heh, and if Naraku does want to make a deal, he damn sure knows where to find me._

This thought was a bit sobering, but again Inuyasha wasn’t worried. Naraku had discovered a way into this world without too much effort, and Inuyasha was sure that another path existed somewhere. Either the dark hanyou or his friends would find it. Hell, maybe there was a way to pass the gateway guarded by the two statues, which nobody had thought of yet. The bottom line: there had to be a way. Ultimately, of far greater concern to Inuyasha was the health of the brave monk who had given him the opportunity to snatch the final Shikon fragment from Naraku’s clutches. It was because of Miroku that Kagome still had a chance to survive this ordeal, and he would be forever grateful. He only hoped that he would be able to thank him in person one day, back in the world of the living.

In the meantime, he would explore this wasteland, and see if he could discover a way out on his own. He sheathed Tetsusaiga and grimaced as his battered and bruised body protested even that movement. Exploration could wait until after a long, well-deserved nap. But he would seek his own salvation, as soon as he’d recovered from the battle. Sitting back and hoping to be rescued had never been his style.

Kagome was still waiting for him.


	27. Lost in a Dream

_They came together much as they had on that night almost three weeks ago. Their dry lips pressing chastely against each other, but creating so much heat that it felt like they might burn. But unlike that evening, Kagome was not satisfied. Inuyasha had probably intended the kiss as a sweet expression of gratitude, but this was not enough for her. And when he moved to pull away, she acted on her desires without thinking. She quickly looped her arms around his neck, pressing her body more fully against his while maintaining contact with his lips. Then she parted her lips and smoothly slipped her tongue inside his mouth._

_She swallowed his shocked gasp, her body questing, seeking something of its own accord. His hands rose to her shoulders as if to push her away, but in the next moment a hungry growl emanated from his throat and his arms wrapped tightly around her. His tongue rose to duel passionately with hers, until finally Kagome gave up and allowed herself to be dominated. One of his hands slipped down to cup her denim-clad backside possessively, drawing a needy mewl from her as she realized that mere kissing was not enough either._

_Inuyasha evidently reached the same conclusion. How they made it to her bed, Kagome would never know. One moment she was standing in his passionate embrace; the next she found herself sandwiched deliciously between the soft mattress and the intoxicating hardness of his body. Even more impressively, he had somehow executed the entire movement without breaking their lip lock. A pleasured groan escaped her throat as a clawed hand slipped under her shirt, leaving tendrils of flame dancing across her stomach. She arched her back, pressing her breasts against the hard planes of his chest, silently begging for more. He obliged, his hand moving slowly upwards, until the tips of his claws brushed the underside of her bra. She moaned into the kiss, throbbing with anticipation, losing control for just a split-second and accidentally biting his tongue._

_Inuyasha grunted in surprise at the sudden flash of pain in his sensitive flesh, and Kagome pulled back, probably intending to apologize. But he followed her, a husky grown rumbling in his throat as he maintained the lip lock. Soon she had forgotten all about her blunder and was enthusiastically participating in their amorous activities once more. Inuyasha too reimmersed himself in their own private world, where all of his senses were fully attuned to the girl underneath him. She was his everything. Today, he would finally show her how much she meant to him._

_She gasped as his hand gently cupped her breast, her heated flesh scorching his palm even through the fabric of her bra. She started to squirm under him as he continued his sensual movements, determined to take his time and memorize the feel of her body as she reacted to his ministrations. Her hands were not idle, fumbling with the ties at his waist, indicating her desire to touch him in the same manner. Inuyasha leaned up so he was straddling her on his knees, and removed his robes with practiced ease. He left his hakama draped loosely across his hips, not wishing to spend any longer than absolutely necessary away from Kagome’s warmth. Even separating from her for a few moments made the room feel chilly. Kagome took advantage of the brief parting as well, much to his delight, sitting up to pull her blouse over her head and reaching behind her to unfasten the clasp of her bra. She started to remove that garment as well, but he hastily caught her hands to stop her. She gazed questioningly into his eyes, only to smile shyly at what she saw and lie back down obediently with her hands at her sides._

_Inuyasha licked his lips subconsciously as he took in the sight of her mostly topless form, the now loosened bra still concealing her twin treasures from his view. He glanced up to her face just to make sure she was still comfortable with continuing, and was shocked at what he glimpsed reflected back at him. Her eyes were wide with wonder, and darkened with longing. It amazed him, that she could be as enthralled by him as he was by her, despite having seen his naked chest on dozens of previous occasions. But mending injuries was a far cry from foreplay to joining as man and woman. Perhaps she was giving him a glimpse of how much she truly loved him._

_Inuyasha laid himself down by her side, resting on his left hip and leaning up on his elbow. Kagome followed him with her eyes, but otherwise remained still. She was nervous, he could tell, but then so was he. Initially, their actions had been driven by lust, a sudden passion which had ensnared both of them. Before they knew it, they’d been on the bed, kissing each other senseless. Things were different now. To continue from here was a conscious decision on both of their parts. And despite the nervousness naturally associated with making love for the first time, neither Inuyasha nor Kagome could detect any trace of uncertainty from their partner. Each of them wanted this, more deeply than they had ever desired anything._

_Truly humbled, Inuyasha reached reverentially for the scrap of fabric currently obstructing his view of his lover’s chest. With a shaking hand, he first freed the ends of the straps from where they’d become trapped underneath her, then slowly pulled the garment away from her body. He didn’t see Kagome draw the shoulder straps down her arms and toss the bra away. Higher brain function temporarily ceased as he stared at her perfect breasts, until the persistent itching sensation in his eyes reminded him of his body’s need to blink. Even then, he couldn’t tear his gaze away from her. He had seen her breasts before, by accident, but those fleeting glances didn’t come close to doing them justice. Their natural beauty was only highlighted by the fine sheen of sweat covering her skin, the way her chest shuddered slightly as she breathed. Her heartbeat thundered in her chest, easily detectable to his sensitive ears, and her tantalizing scent coiled around him like an intoxicating perfume. She had bared her body for him. She was aroused for him, and by him. He would keep her waiting no longer._

_She yelped as he firmly grasped her breast with his free hand, not expecting him to be so bold. But despite the lust coursing through his veins, he was gentle with her, and she had no complaints. To the contrary, her soft involuntary moans were music to his ears, as he massaged her tender flesh. Encouraged, he decided to experiment, leaning over and blowing softly on her other breast. The hitch in her breathing told him that she liked it, so he did it again, watching in fascination as her nipple hardened. Getting a rather wicked idea, he pursed his lips and latched them firmly onto her erect bud, not bothering to lead up to this with foreplay. Kagome cried out at the intensity of the sensation, arching her back as he practically drew her up off the mattress with his steady suction. Then he bit down with his teeth, too weakly to leave a mark, but definitely hard enough to remind her of her little slip-up before. It wrung a strangled hiss from her, which he couldn’t tell was born of pleasure or pain._

_She rolled to the side suddenly, and for a moment Inuyasha wondered if he’d gone too far. Until he saw the playful look in her eyes, and a mischievous smile which promised no end to trouble. In short order, the powerful hanyou found himself lying flat on his back, with Kagome straddling his hips. Any thoughts of protesting were immediately dispelled when she ground her denim-clad core against his throbbing erection. The scent of her excitement increased as she continued to move against him, bathing him in her essence. Her cheeks flushed and her eyes threatened to slide shut in rapture as she rode him toward the climax she could feel approaching from some distance off, yet tantalizingly close. But she soon stopped herself, gazing down at him with a hungry look which inspired both fear and anticipation from her lover._

_There was pleasure in touching Kagome, in making her mewl underneath him. There was also pleasure in being touched by her, as Inuyasha was pleased to discover. She leaned in and kissed him deeply, plundering his mouth as her breasts pressed teasingly against the hard planes of his chest. One of her hands snaked up to the top of his head and latched onto an ear, massaging it tenderly. He groaned against her lips, a flash of sensation shooting straight to his groin. He had never associated having his ears rubbed with sexual pleasure, but he would from now on. Under the right circumstances, of course. Everything Kagome was doing felt right, her hands gliding over his flesh, the little flexes of her hips which she couldn’t stop herself from making, and even when she returned his earlier favor and bit his nipple. Idly Inuyasha reflected that this made them uneven once again the biting department, but he had a feeling that this was a contest he was never going to win. Not that he really minded losing._

_He was, after all, the luckiest damn hanyou the world had ever known. This was his thought as he reversed their positions and hovered over her. Kagome’s hair was tousled, her upper body flushed and her lips well-kissed. For a few moments he simply stared, overwhelmed by her beauty. She gazed up at him in awe, equally captivated. He gulped, realizing that before they went any further, he needed to be absolutely sure that she wanted this. Because once he saw her fully naked, sampled the aroma of her arousal uninhibited by her remaining clothing, it was going to be exponentially more difficult for him to stop. It would be nothing short of torture to end things here, but he would do it if she asked it of him._

_"Kagome…" he breathed, knowing from the look in her eyes that he didn’t need to say anything more. She beamed at him, and he was sure she was about to nod her acceptance or say something which would set his heart ablaze with passion. But instead her smile faded, her eyes becoming unfocused as her head lolled back to stare blankly at the ceiling._

_"Kagome? What’s wrong?" he demanded, suddenly worried. She was unresponsive, so he tried again, shaking her a little this time. "Kagome? Kagome!"_

_"Help…me," she whispered in a tiny, frightened voice, her lips trembling._

_"I’m here, Kagome. Everything’s going to be okay. I’ll protect you!"_

_"Help…me," she repeated, just before her body seized violently, her breath coming in shallow gasps._

_"Kagome!"_

_Her head snapped around to glare at him, with eyes which were no longer her own. She smirked, an expression as foreign to her as the cruelty in her gaze. His beloved Kagome was gone, replaced by a monster._

_"Don’t worry, Inuyasha," it stated in a tone which cut straight through him. "Kagome knows she’s second best."_

Inuyasha woke screaming, in a blind panic. It was several long moments before he was able to gather his bearings and reconcile the perverse conjurings of his mind with reality. He took a deep, shuddering breath and drew his knees up, resting his head in his hands as he willed his heartbeat to slow. What remained of his erection was withering faster than if someone had dumped ice water on his loins. The truth was that he was okay and so was Kagome, but he would be extremely grateful if he never had to experience that fiction again.

He’d be lying if he said it was the first time he’d dreamt of that afternoon in her bedroom, where passion had temporarily overcome reason. But he and Kagome had never gone that far in any of the previous occasions, and in fact it was the first time he’d had a ‘sexy’ dream since her abduction. What did that say? Inuyasha was no expert on the human/hanyou subconscious, but he would guess it had something to do with his earth-shattering revelations yesterday. Due to exhaustion, he hadn’t spent much time thinking about it last night—was it last night? How long had he been asleep? In this world of perpetual daylight, it was impossible to keep track of the passage of time. At any rate, it was as though his conscience had given him permission to dream about her in _that_ way again, now that his feelings were clear.

He sighed, banging his head off the rock wall at his back. _I am officially the biggest idiot alive._ Even that might have been an understatement. He’d found a cave to take shelter in to make it easier to sleep, but now it would function as an ideal place for personal reflection. Oh, joy, his favorite pastime. But he couldn’t put it off any longer. His thoughts drifted back to his dream, to the amazingly pleasurable part before that horrible ending. In his experience, the typical ‘sexy’ dream—and he’d had them occasionally in the past—was about sex, in particular the physical aspects of the act. But that dream…that was about so much more. _She was his everything. Today, he would finally show her how much she meant to him._ During sleep, he’d known the truth, that he loved Kagome with all his heart. And so he dreamt about ‘making love’ to her, a phrase which was foreign to him but which seemed to perfectly describe what they’d been doing. As for where he’d heard it, he couldn’t say. Maybe on the television back in her time. Regardless, the contents of his heart during his dream were crystal clear to him. They were the same feelings which blossomed in his waking heart.

It had been a lengthy process, this bout of self-discovery, starting prior to the conception of their child, and continuing to this day. He’d spent much of that time clinging stubbornly to the status quo, but there had been a few ‘moments’ too. An obvious one was the night after Kikyou’s hateful rebuke, when Kagome had nearly left him. Then followed a long period of consistency; even making out with Kagome in her room and learning of Kikyou’s apparent demise had changed little. In addition to being the lowest, most miserable time of his life, Kagome’s subsequent abduction had also been a major turning point. He’d known before then that she was important to him. But the incredible depth of his need for her had remained hidden from him until she was taken away, with little initial hope of getting her back. How many times had he reflected that life wasn’t worth living unless Kagome was by his side?

So it was not as though his revelations yesterday had emerged completely out of the blue, though the stress and trauma of the battle had certainly accelerated his progress down the path to enlightenment. And it had almost cost him everything. He shivered as he recalled the experience of nearly losing himself to the Shikon no Tama’s evil, then smiled at the warmth which had saved him. Even before that, when he’d been so desperate to break through Housenki’s shell, he’d started to come to terms with the emotions held deep within his heart. He’d pushed himself to his limits and beyond, both physically and mentally, and then during a true moment of death, he’d experienced an epiphany. He was actually grateful for everything that had happened; who knew how long it would have taken him to pull his head out of his ass otherwise? But of course, coming to terms with his feelings was the easy part, relatively speaking. Figuring out what to _do_ with that knowledge was the real challenge.

He could no longer entertain even the slimmest element of doubt with regards to what he truly wanted. It was Kagome, plain and simple. He wanted her as a mate, a wife, and a partner to raise a family with. She had always been his best friend, and no doubt would continue to be, even as they progressed to lovers and beyond. He wanted to spend every single day by her side, until death did them part. And she desired him in the same way. It seemed so obvious now, looking back on her evolving behavior over the time they’d known each other. But there had been a cloud over his vision which prevented him from seeing Kagome as she truly was. And despite how stupid he now felt, he was exceedingly grateful that it had been removed.

Still, the dreaded question remained: what did he do about Kikyou? If she was truly dead, then the answer was simple—he would move on and begin life anew. If, however, she still maintained her borrowed existence in the world of the living, then the issue became more complicated. His responsibilities to Kikyou didn’t just go away because he’d decided to be honest with himself concerning his desire for a life with her reincarnation. Nor would she be especially thrilled to learn of his change of heart. He shuddered just thinking about that potential confrontation. But he had to wonder, was the remorse he felt concerning Kikyou born of guilt, or merely sadness?

There was no doubt that he felt genuinely sorry for her. She had a tragic past, and had died far too young, without being able to experience hardly any of the joy which made life in this bleak, desolate world worth living. He liked to think that he’d given her a small taste of happiness, during the short time they’d spent together. There was still much he would give of himself in order to make her happy. But not his life, nor his future. Those no longer belonged to her.

His life…didn’t belong to Kikyou. That was a novel concept, at least to him. Not to anyone else; his friends had been subtly trying to convince him of its truthfulness for months. While he’d been stuck on his self-manufactured guilt, those closest to him believed he should have forgiven himself for his part in Kikyou’s death ages ago. It still pained him to think of it, the tragedy which had befallen them. They’d both been tricked by Naraku, hurt and loneliness driving them to revert to their old selves. He’d selfishly tried to take the Shikon no Tama, and Kikyou had stopped him, as any miko would be expected to do. They both shared equal blame for falling victim to Naraku’s ruse, for never allowing their relationship to progress to a point where such deception would fail. After her resurrection, he’d nevertheless placed the lion’s share of the culpability upon his own shoulders, perhaps a consequence of elevating Kikyou atop an unrealistic pedestal. But her recent behavior toward Kagome had made it easier for him to see her in a less favorable light. Kikyou had changed. The version who had walked the earth before vanishing at Mount Hakurei was not the same woman he’d fallen for fifty years ago. The kind, lonely soul he’d known had succumbed to bitterness and hatred. He firmly believed that the true Kikyou still existed, that her heart had not been entirely corrupted. But that Kikyou was gone, and he didn’t expect to see her again anytime soon. Which begged the question—if Kikyou was just as much at fault for her death as he was, and she was reduced to barely a shell of her former self…why did he have to die for her?

He groaned, deciding to stop asking rhetorical questions which made him feel stupid. In his defense, he hadn’t exactly started on this emotional journey in a state of divine tranquility. To the contrary, he’d been pretty damn screwed up back then. It had taken weeks after his revival for Kagome to make any progress in getting him to open up at all, progress which had quickly been obliterated due to Kikyou’s resurrection. His dark past had literally come back to haunt him, completely frying his emotional compass and turning his rational mind into mush. So he would try not to be _too_ hard on himself, so long as things turned out the way he hoped. If he could free Kagome from Naraku’s clutches, he knew that she would forgive him for being so blind. Then, and only then, would he forgive himself.

In the meantime, he would carry on, pushing forward with all of his willpower. And if he did happen to meet Kikyou, this time he would inform her of his decision. His heart clenched, reminding him of his sympathy, which had in no way diminished. Kikyou hadn’t deserved the suffering fate had beset upon her. She was a good person, and should have been afforded the happiness enjoyed by countless people much less admirable than herself. He would still do what he could to help her. If she came to him, he would not refuse to meet with her. If she wanted a sympathetic ear, he would listen without complaint. If she asked something reasonable of him which was within his power to give, he would comply without hesitation. She deserved no less. But she did _not_ deserve his life, and he would never again let her take him away from where he truly belonged.

A sudden gust of wind inside the cave broke him from his musings, carrying with it a scent which immediately set his nerves to firing. He jumped up and grasped Tetsusaiga’s hilt as a familiar face peeked into the cave entrance.

"Finally awake, eh Inuyasha?" she observed with an amused grin.

"Kagura! What the hell are you doing here? Why didn’t you go back with Naraku?"

Grimacing, she dismounted her feather and stepped fully into the entrance. "You caught me with your first diamond spear attack," she stated with an edge of annoyance to her tone, lifting her arm so he could see the jagged hole in the right side of her kimono. The flesh underneath had fully healed, but judging by the damage to her clothing, Kagura had taken a serious hit.

"That fuckin’ hurt," she added, though it didn’t seem like she had revenge on her mind. "By the time I recovered, Naraku was already gone."

"Heh, so you’re stuck here too, huh?" Inuyasha deduced with a smirk, relaxing his stance. Whatever Kagura’s intentions were in visiting him, they didn’t appear to be violent. She certainly could have attacked him in his sleep if she’d wanted to. He liked to think that he would have woken in time to defend himself, but was glad she’d decided not to test his reflexes.

"Pretty much," she answered casually, confirming his theory.

"So what happens now?"

She shrugged. "Hell if I know. I was hoping you knew something I didn’t."

"Like a way out of here? Sorry, but we’re both shit outta luck."

"Damn. Oh, well," she replied with a sigh, "then I guess we just wait for Naraku to find another pathway."

"We?" Inuyasha repeated incredulously.

"You’re stuck with me, Inuyasha, whether you like it or not. Naraku’s too damn obsessed with the jewel to leave you here with a piece of it. I stick by you, and maybe I get to go back to the world of the living. Because that bastard definitely won’t go out of his way to help me."

While Inuyasha wasn’t initially thrilled with the prospect of Kagura tagging along with him, he knew there was little he could do about it. Trying to chase her off would take a lot of effort and would likely prove futile anyway. Not to mention completely pointless, since he had no real reason to drive her away. Kagura didn’t seem to want to fight, and neither did he. If she was willing to be civil, he would reciprocate. Besides, even having the wind sorceress for company sounded better than wandering alone in this graveyard.

"Keh, do whatever you want. I’m finding my own way out."

"Tch, overconfident as always. Are you thinking of the gateway we were at before?" Kagura inquired dryly. "Sorry, but I already tried it. That thing won’t open from the inside."

"Maybe for you," Inuyasha retorted. "It _will_ open for Tetsusaiga."

Kagura still looked skeptical, but made no further attempt to dissuade him from his purpose. It was a short journey to the gateway, with Inuyasha catching a ride on one of the skeletal birds and Kagura following on her feather. She didn’t offer him a ride, and he wouldn’t have accepted anyway. In the end, the entire endeavor proved an exercise in frustration. No matter what he and Tetsusaiga threw at the gate, it wouldn’t budge. At least Kagura knew better than to rub it in. The flight back was uncomfortably silent, each party equally disappointed.

"Damn, that’s one big bastard," Kagura muttered during the final approach, eyeing the massive skeleton looming up before them.

"That’s my oyaji."

Her eyes went comically wide. "Your…wow. Sorry."

"Keh, it’s fine. He is a big bastard. I never knew him. He gave me Tetsusaiga and my fire-rat, but that’s about it." Inuyasha intended to speak dismissively, but there was a certain sadness in his tone which he couldn’t quite cover up. His bitterness against his father had softened over the years, especially since his reawakening. He no longer hated the Inu no Taisho for leaving him and his mother alone in that cursed village. Something about having people who cared about him helped to heal old wounds.

Kagura frowned curiously. "Does Sesshoumaru have a form like that too?"

"Yep."

"That would be pretty interesting to see."

"Keh, it’s not that impressive. How do you think that asshole lost his arm?"

She turned to regard him contemplatively. "I always wondered about that. Was it your doing?"

Inuyasha nodded. "It was either that or get Kagome and myself killed. Even back then, I was driven to protect her," he reflected with a genuine smile, forgetting for a moment who he was talking to. Kagura said nothing, instead descending to land on a convenient rock ledge with a thoughtful expression on her face. She reclined against the rock and closed her eyes with a sigh. Inuyasha hesitated for a moment, then moved to join her. He sat down perhaps a meter or two away, eyeing her warily. This was odd, carrying on a conversation with an enemy, but not unpleasant. But then, Kagura wasn’t really an enemy anymore, was she?

"Thank you," he said quietly, causing her to blink at him in confusion.

"For what?"

"You said you would watch out for Kagome. She and the baby are still alive."

"Tch, I didn’t really do anything. I told you already, I couldn’t stop them from hurting her if I wanted to."

Inuyasha nodded; he understood Kagura’s limitations but was still grateful to have someone on the inside looking out for his beloved woman and child. It did make him wonder though…if Naraku held Kagura’s heart in his hands, why was she still alive?

"Why hasn’t Naraku killed you?" he asked, immediately cringing at his lack of tact. Fortunately, Kagura took no offense.

"Probably because I don’t know anything about his plans. I could talk to you for days and you’d never learn a thing. Although…there is one thing which you might find interesting," she stated, looking around reflexively as if to make sure her master wasn’t listening. "The infant controlling Kagome’s body wants to betray Naraku too."

"He does?" Now that _was_ interesting. If Hakago was keen on liberating himself from Naraku, then perhaps he could be ‘persuaded’ to leave Kagome unharmed once the dark hanyou was dead? It was an intriguing possibility, and Inuyasha could only consider this revelation to be good news.

"Don’t go thinking that little cretin is on your side," Kagura told him, perhaps sensing the direction of his thoughts. "He’s as twisted and sadistic as Naraku. I wouldn’t trust either one of them if I were you."

"Oh, but I can trust you?"

Kagura smirked mischievously. "Of _course_ you can."

Inuyasha scoffed and shook his head. The funny thing, however, was that he _did_ trust Kagura. Not as he trusted his friends, obviously, but enough to be sitting here with her carrying on a casual conversation. Enough to honestly believe that she would play a role in defeating Naraku and returning Kagome to his arms.

The unlikely pair lapsed into companionable silence for a while, each lost in their own thoughts. Finally Kagura broke the peace with a wistful sigh.

"What’s it like, knowing you’re gonna be a father? I bet you’re scared shitless."

"I used to be," he answered honestly, remembering Kagome’s comforting words to him in the well house all those weeks ago. "Now I just worry about getting them back. Kagome and I can figure out the rest."

"Well, that’s a very mature attitude, Inuyasha."

"You mocking me, wench?"

"Yes. What’re you gonna do about it?"

Inuyasha chuckled, deciding he was ‘mature’ enough to refrain from rising to that challenge. Fighting was clearly the last thing on either of their minds right now, despite Kagura’s teasing. He would not, however, let a comment like that go without a suitable response.

"Why are you asking about that, anyway? Lookin’ to get knocked up yourself?"

Kagura glanced at him in surprise, then smirked in amusement. "If you’re propositioning me, you can go to hell. I’d rather fuck the little toad-thing that follows your brother around."

"Keh, I don’t think Jaken would be too thrilled about that. And I wouldn’t fuck you even if you begged me for it."

"Don’t hold your breath on that one. The fact that you found one woman willing to lie with you is mindboggling. Kagome must be messed up in the head."

Inuyasha grimaced, that last comment having hit a sore spot though Kagura obviously hadn’t intended it to. She’d merely been teasing, but her statement was true—it really _was_ amazing that he’d found a woman willing to be with him. Kagura’s comment had probably been more directed toward his personality than his hanyou heritage, but neither should have been very attractive to members of the opposite gender. Normally they weren’t. But Kagome wasn’t normal; she was once in a lifetime. If he lost her, he would never find love again, even if he wanted to.

"You’ll get her back," Kagura stated quietly, sensing the shift in his mood. Inuyasha looked over to find her gazing at him confidently, and he could tell that she honestly believed her words.

"Thanks," he told her, his spirits buoyed by her faith. He would return to the living world and slay Naraku. And when the evil which had destroyed countless lives was finally vanquished, he would hold Kagome in his arms again. That was no dream; it was a promise.

* * *

Sango rocked slowly back and forth, unable to refrain from fidgeting. Petting Kirara in her lap provided some comfort, but her nerves were completely shot. Still, she managed to hold herself together, just barely, as she’d been doing for more than a full day. Dusk was fast approaching now, and still Miroku lay unconscious, his breathing fitful and shallow. It was hard to believe that just over twenty-four hours ago, her beloved Houshi-sama had been hale and healthy, full of vitality. And not lying on the floor of some rundown abandoned hut, fighting for his very life.

One thing was for sure: she had gained a new appreciation for what Inuyasha had gone through after they’d been poisoned by Mukotsu. The sense of helplessness was the worst part, knowing that there was literally nothing she could do except wait and pray. Still, she tried to be optimistic. They had already been extremely fortunate in at least one respect, namely the presence of Inuyasha’s diminutive vassal. After their retreat from the battle, which Naraku had undoubtedly allowed so Sango could watch her beloved suffer an agonizing death, Myouga had directed her to find shelter as quickly as possible. Luck had led them to this hut within a few minutes, as Miroku’s life faded before her eyes. Then the flea had sucked out as much of the poison as he dared, before declaring that to take any more would condemn the monk to death by blood loss.

‘Whether he lives is in his own hands now, and the Kami’s.’ Those were Myouga’s words, though Sango had descended into a state of deep shock by that point. Her entire world narrowed to the rise and fall of his chest, her heart starting and stopping with the irregularity of his breathing. She hadn’t even been aware of Myouga and Shippou leaving, until they returned with a potion which would help to restore Miroku’s health, if he could survive the poison still coursing through his bloodstream. Even then, she had barely acknowledged them beyond taking the offered plastic bottle. It wasn’t until a few hours ago, when Miroku’s condition started to noticeably improve, that she came back to herself. At last she realized that she was not the only one suffering.

Shippou had remained by her side throughout this ordeal, providing comfort with his presence alone, and had also helped Myouga gather the ingredients for the restorative potion. The flea, who had obviously played the greatest role in assuring Miroku’s continued existence, had disappeared late last night. Sango couldn’t begin to guess the reason for his departure, but she would not begrudge him for it. As he said, Miroku’s life was in his own hands now, and in the Kami’s.

Motion to her left drew her attention, and she turned to see Shippou’s head snap up, only to sink down again as his eyes drooped against his will. He was desperately trying to stay awake, probably for her sake, but it was obviously a losing battle. Sango smiled for the first time since yesterday afternoon. It was just a tiny upturn of her lips, but it was completely genuine. She thought back to what she had learned of the battle against the Shichinintai at the temple, and how Shippou had saved all of them from the fire. He was so courageous under pressure, and at times seemed to possess more wisdom and maturity than certain other members of the group. It was easy to forget how young he was, that he was just a child, an orphan who hadn’t been held by his mother in years. Sango knew no one could replace the woman who had given birth to him and raised him into a fine young man, but for today, she would do her best. Scooting over to him, she gently scooped him up in her arms and held him as she would an infant. He gazed up at her briefly, his eyes unfocused due to fatigue, and relaxed completely. Within seconds, he was sleeping soundly in her arms.

A few rogue tears slipped down Sango’s cheeks, but she didn’t bother to wipe them away. _Someday, I will hold Houshi-sama’s child like this._ There were a daunting number of ‘ifs’ to satisfy before that dream could become a reality, however. If he survived the night, if he recovered from the poison, if his kazaana didn’t consume him, if Naraku could be killed, if… The uncertainty was overwhelming. But she would continue to press on, to take one goal at a time. Seeing Miroku through the night was the only thing that mattered right now.

"S-Sango…"

She gasped at his voice, so weak, yet just the sound sent a surge of hope through her. She was disappointed to discover that he was not awake, but was merely talking in his sleep. She consoled herself with the knowledge that his condition was improving. Up until now, he’d been unconscious. Now, he seemed to be genuinely sleeping, which was cause for optimism in itself. Even his fever had gone down; his brow no longer sweat profusely, though she still kept the cold compress there. _This is how Inuyasha must have felt after Renkotsu gave us the antidote. Daring to hope, yet still fearing the worst._

Miroku mumbled her name again, this time in a husky tone which had Sango flushing despite herself. But though she was beyond embarrassed, she took comfort in the possibility that he was starting to feel like his old self again, at least mentally. She was nevertheless extremely grateful when he settled down and made no further sounds to indicate continued dreams of a sensual nature. If she was being honest with herself, she was very happy that he dreamt of her in such a manner, rather than some other woman. But she was in no mood to enjoy the knowledge that he fantasized about her. At least not until he was well again.

It happened a few hours later, as the crickets chirped in the darkness outside, and the light from her hastily-constructed fire cast the room in deep shadow. Miroku stirred, then hissed in discomfort. He opened his eyes and gazed blankly up at the ceiling for a moment, as if silently wondering how he was still alive. Then he turned to regard her, a certain level of awe leaking into his expression. He closed his eyes and smiled softly, and when he opened them again, his gaze was filled with deep emotion.

"I’m sorry, Sango," he rasped. "I’ve made you cry again for my sake."

Sango choked back a sob. More tears broke free of the dams which held them back, but she didn’t care. This man was someone she didn’t have to be afraid to show weakness to. She didn’t have to constantly be the strong, unshakable warrior. He had seen her at her lowest moments, and then asked her to live with him and bear his children. And it seemed that she was still going to have the opportunity to do just that. It was for this reason that she was able to smile through her tears, and find her voice.

"Don’t apologize, Houshi-sama. What you did…it was—"

"Reckless and foolhardy?"

"No! I mean, yes, but…what you almost gave up for Inuyasha and Kagome-chan…it was really noble. I can’t fault you for it."

He sighed. "It is a relief to hear you say that, Sango. Honestly…it is a relief to still be here. I did not expect…to see you again."

Sango sniffled, but launched into a brief explanation of how he had survived Naraku’s poison, highlighting the contributions of Myouga and Shippou.

"I will have to thank both of them later," he replied, eyeing the slumbering kitsune in her arms. "Do you know where Myouga ran off to?" At the shake of her head, he shrugged, or tried to before grimacing in discomfort. Moving around was certainly not going to be fun for a while. But considering how much of a blessing it was to still be at Sango’s side, he wouldn’t complain.

"How are you feeling?"

"I’ve been better," he replied with a wry grin. "Though I’ve also been worse." He wasn’t sure that last part was entirely true, but he’d said it for Sango’s sake. He just hoped she didn’t press his memory to name a specific instance.

She didn’t look like she really believed him, but she let it go. Her relief was a palpable thing, and once more he felt remorse for causing her so much sorrow. He tried to raise his arm to wipe her tears away, but it only rose about half a meter off the floor and hung there trembling, refusing to go any higher. Sango caught his hand with her free one just before he let it drop, settling both comfortably in her lap. Kirara nuzzled and licked his fingers, and he relaxed fully, content despite how lousy he felt. Sango squeezed his hand tightly, but it did not prevent his mind from wandering. The last thing he remembered before blacking out was incredible agony, and the knowledge that Sango’s plaintive cry of his name was the last time he was ever going to hear her voice. If he had died like that, he was pretty sure his soul would have had a difficult time finding nirvana. But he had no regrets concerning his final actions; he would give his life for Inuyasha or Kagome, just as they would do for him.

He was obviously pleased that his intended self-sacrifice had been averted. He hadn’t comprehended his salvation until waking up just a few minutes ago. But before that, he’d had some rather _vivid_ experiences. Those dreams had been special, on many levels. He glanced at Sango, wondering if he should share. She seemed incredibly happy to see him recovering, obviously, but her expression was guarded, as if she couldn’t bring herself to truly rejoice yet. He decided to give her something to take her mind off of his sorry state, something which might assure her that he was really all right.

"While I was asleep, I saw something…interesting."

Sango barely managed to refrain from groaning. She _so_ did not want to hear about this right now! But she didn’t have the heart to stop him from saying whatever he wanted to, so she vowed to focus on the fact that he was well again. Hopefully his little story didn’t completely destroy the mood, though Sango wasn’t optimistic.

"I dreamt that I was asking your father for your hand."

It took Sango a moment to wrap her head around those words, since they were so far from what she’d anticipated. Judging by his slightly smug expression, he knew exactly what she’d expected him to say. In truth, he really had enjoyed one of _those_ dreams too. But there was a time and place for everything, and describing a beautiful love dream with Sango didn’t seem like the best idea while he was lying on what, but for some fortunate circumstances, might have been his deathbed. Besides, he honestly wasn’t sure which dream was more special to him, though he was pretty sure he knew which one Sango would most enjoy.

"Wh-what did my father say?" she asked breathlessly, just the reaction Miroku was looking for.

"He said ‘yes,’ of course. That it was a great honor to have such a handsome and noble son-in-law." When Sango arched a disbelieving eyebrow at him, Miroku shrugged helplessly. "Well, it was only a dream, after all."

Sango rolled her eyes, shaking her head with a grin. _It was a fantasy, you mean. Handsome? Maybe, but I don’t know why my father would care about that. Noble? In some aspects, yes, but not in others._

"What did my father look like?" she inquired, curious to see just how ridiculous this ‘dream’ of his had become.

"Uh…a large, bald man with a moustache?"

Sango couldn’t stop herself from laughing at that. The man Miroku had just described looked nothing like her father. He did, however, closely resemble the monk Mushin, who had served as Miroku’s most recent father figure. A student of the human mind might have a field day with that one. Sango didn’t care about that, but she did desire to set the record straight with respect to her real father.

"Well, you got the moustache part right, at least. But my father wasn’t large or bald. He would have approved of you though…eventually. If you behaved yourself and let him see the real you. He would have had a few stern words for you before giving you permission to marry me though. There might have been a threat issued too, which would not have been empty. My father was a kind man, but if you were foolish enough to anger him…"

Miroku chuckled nervously. "The man who raised you possessed a temper, Sango? I can’t imagine."

The taijiya narrowed her eyes at the hint of playful sarcasm in his voice. "Something you want to say, Houshi-sama?"

"Nothing."

"Good."

She favored him with a stern look, but inside she was smirking. So she had a bit if a temper…okay, more than a bit. She liked to think it was one of the reasons Miroku saw her differently from other women. Besides, a temper was probably necessary to keep his lecherous behind in line.

He squeezed her hand, drawing her attention to his suddenly serious expression. "I am glad that you think your father would have approved of me, Sango."

"Me too," she replied honestly, gazing into his eyes. For a few moments they were lost, completely captivated by each other.

"Kami, you’re beautiful," he whispered, drawing color to her cheeks. In all honestly, Sango was sure she looked like hell. She hadn’t slept in almost two full days, and she’d been crying. Even so, that Miroku would still tell her she was beautiful in that tone of voice, with that particular expression on his face…it meant a lot. It spoke of an appreciation of inner beauty, which coming from a man normally so preoccupied with _outer_ beauty, was truly special. Sango wondered how to respond to his romantic words. She knew what her heart desired, but she had never been so forward before. Though her nerves flared, she tamped them down, for once resolving to push her own boundaries. Because as the past twenty-four hours had shown her, any moment with Miroku might be their last.

She leaned over him and set Shippou down against his side, Miroku having shifted his arm to form a comfortable bed for the kit. The little fox stirred, but did not wake. Instead of sitting up, however, Sango shifted her body so she was leaning more fully over Miroku, their noses fairly close to touching. The monk’s eyes widened, a mixture of hope and longing swimming in his dark orbs. But beyond everything, there was love, which encouraged Sango to close the distance between them.

Her first thought as their lips made contact was ‘I should have done this ages ago.’ How could something which she had dreaded, something which she in her shyness had feared, feel so right? Time became incomprehensible, as their lips pressed together, shifting languidly in time with their breathing. Soon, however, Miroku’s natural tendencies made themselves known. His hand came to rest on her lower back, pulling her close, as his lips parted and his tongue began teasing beseechingly at her entrance. There was a little voice in the back of her head telling her that she should pull away immediately, and maybe slap him for good measure, but Sango ignored it. She unconsciously pressed her body more firmly against his own as she opened her mouth. Still not entirely sure of herself, she allowed him to lead her, to coax her into further deepening the kiss. She groaned softly, just a tiny sound at the back of her throat, as her body began to tingle in that delightful way which only resulted from touching him.

Then he was gone, and Sango slowly blinked her eyes open to the sound of heavy breathing. He had turned his head to the side and was inhaling great gulps of air as rapidly as he could, a wounded man suffering from shortness of breath far more acutely than he normally would. Sango pulled back into a kneeling position, instantly remorseful and intensely embarrassed for failing to remember his condition.

"I’m so sorry, Houshi-sama. Are you all right?"

He made a sound which she thought might have been attempted laughter. "Sango…you kiss me like that…and then apologize? Believe me…a little loss of breath was worth it."

Sango blushed and looked away. One would think that a comment as innocuous as that one wouldn’t fluster her now, but the almost complete lack of lechery in his tone was warming her in an entirely pleasant way. It was as though the intimacy itself held less meaning for him than the fact that he had shared it with her.

"Please tell me…we can do that again…when I’m feeling better."

He spoke with the same awestruck tone, but still Sango bit her lip, unsure of what to say. On the one hand, she didn’t regret the kiss even though he had taken it much farther than she’d originally intended. She had very much been along for the ride, and wouldn’t mind engaging in similar activities in the future. This is part of what scared her, that they would end up going too far and do something they’d regret. Beyond that, her persistent doubts concerning his fidelity refused to be ignored. Not two weeks ago, he’d gone off with some stranger from the village of oni-women. Granted, that was before he’d proposed to her, but still… Had anything really changed? What would he do, the next time his faithfulness was tested? And did her acceptance or refusal to be intimate with him have any bearing on how likely he was to remain faithful to her?

"Sango?"

She looked at him, allowing him to see the uncertainty swimming in her eyes, uncertainty which he had caused. He sighed in self-reproach, then clasped her hand gently where it rested on her knee.

"Sango, if you want to wait until we’re married, then I will wait. It won’t change how I feel about you. But…if you wanted to be intimate—and I know we can only go so far—then…I think it would be really special."

Sango felt a smile come unbidden to her lips. He seemed so sincere, that she couldn’t help but believe him despite her reservations. This was the man she intended to spend her life with; perhaps it was time to trust him. And in that trust, perhaps he would find the willpower to resist temptation. Still, the prospect of being ‘intimate’ with him was as unnerving as it was exciting, and she wasn’t ready to give an affirmative response just yet.

"W-we’ll see, Houshi-sama…when you’re feeling better."

Far from being disappointed, Miroku appeared thrilled that she hadn’t responded in the negative. "Then I shall have to get well as quickly as possible."

"Hm, and speaking of…drink this," she told him, handing him the plastic bottle containing Myouga’s restorative potion. She had been slowly feeding it to him while he slept, so it was more than half empty. She would make him drink the rest before he went back to sleep, and then open a fresh bottle tomorrow. Myouga had made plenty, a fact which would soon be to Miroku’s chagrin. She’d tried a taste of it herself once out of curiosity, and would not be doing so again. The stuff was nasty, but as long as it worked, she didn’t care. And since she had unintentionally given Miroku even more of a reason to recover quickly, she didn’t think he would complain too much.

"Is this the reason I woke with a foul taste in my mouth," he asked, eyeing the bottle warily.

"Yes. Myouga made it, so it must work. Drink."

He sighed, then took a swig, and Sango giggled at the face he made. "What is this stuff?!"

"It’s probably better if you don’t know."

"Fair enough," he replied with a grimace, before taking another swig. In a few minutes the bottle was empty, and after getting him some water to rinse the awful taste out of his mouth, Sango began preparations to settle down for the night. She helped Miroku sit up so he could relieve himself, since she certainly wasn’t allowing him to get up. She felt guilty for using some of Kagome’s cookware for the task, but there was no other adequately-sized container available, and she would wash it thoroughly in the morning. Afterwards Miroku lay down and closed his eyes, seemingly exhausted by that simple effort. It was a reminder that although his life was no longer truly in danger, it would take some time for him to recover fully.

Sango’s own fatigue hit her as she was walking back inside from taking care of her own business. Groggily she spread out her sleeping roll and crawled inside. The last thing she did before closing her eyes was cover Miroku and Shippou with the flap of Kagome’s sleeping bag, which had served as the monk’s bedding since yesterday. Just before unconsciousness claimed her, she felt a touch of warmth against her hand, feather light. She clasped Miroku’s hand and squeezed gently, grinning as he reciprocated. Then, at last, she drifted off to sweet dreams.


	28. The Hard Way Home

Inuyasha’s stomach growled audibly, and he grimaced at the fresh hunger pangs which coiled in his gut. The sensation was disturbing but not surprising, since he hadn’t eaten in at least three or four days. Again, it was impossible to accurately keep track of time in this world of perpetual daylight. As a hanyou, he could go without food or water for much longer than a human, which was fortunate because this world seemed to be entirely devoid of both. He did wonder, however, just how long his body could continue to function without any sort of nourishment or hydration. Hopefully they would find a means of escape soon, and he wouldn’t have to face a slow, torturous death.

"Ugh," Kagura groaned from her place in front of him. "Knock that shit off. It just reminds me how hungry I am."

"Keh, I can’t exactly help it, bitch," he snapped, not caring if he was being rude. They had been grating on each other’s nerves as of late, but had yet to lapse into physical violence. It was anyone’s guess how long that would last, especially with even the wind sorceress feeling the effects of malnutrition. Evidently, not even full-youkai could survive for any great length of time without food and water.

Kagura muttered under her breath about using his ‘damn Inu nose’ to find sustenance, but he ignored her. Of course he’d been keeping his nose active every waking moment; there was simply nothing to smell. Sighing, he looked back toward his father’s skeleton, which was just barely visible silhouetted against the distant sky. They had not yet traveled beyond seeing distance of the grave in their search for food, water, and a way out. It was their only landmark to speak of, and it was oddly comforting to at least have a place they could return to and call ‘home.’ But if their quest continued to prove fruitless, they would have no choice but to depart from this area, never to return.

He gritted his teeth and scrambled to hang on as Kagura took a hard turn. Inuyasha glared at the back of her head, that hint of a smirk he could see on her lips indicating that her sudden maneuver had been no accident. But then, that’s what he got for running his mouth while riding on her feather. If there was any alternative means of transportation available, he would gladly take it. But no matter how much you kicked and swore at them, the damn skeletal birds would only go so far away from their roost, which was near his father’s grave. That left the exhausting prospect of running and jumping all over this Kami-forsaken land as the only alternative to hitching a ride with Kagura. He’d actually tried that for about half a day, before giving in and asking her. _That_ hadn’t been fun, since she’d already been subtly teasing him about it and wasn’t about to forego a little enjoyment at his expense. But he’d put up with the humiliation, for the sole reason that expending energy and sweat when he had no means to replace what his body lost was a very bad idea. He had to avoid anything that would hasten his death, for his sake and Kagome’s.

Kagura took another sharp turn around a large rock pillar, but this time Inuyasha was ready and had no trouble maintaining his balance. The topography was another problem with this place. When viewed from above, a thick white mist covered most of the features, meaning one had to travel under the fog to actually see anything. Otherwise, they might fly right over something important and never even realize it. This of course meant a much slower search, as they made their way through a maze of varied rock formations. Some were spectacular to behold, with bizarre shapes which defied explanation, but crucially all were devoid of life or anything life-giving. Wherever he looked, he saw bare rock. And whenever he slept, he dreamt of bare rock. It was enough to threaten to drive a man insane. And it was for this reason that he was glad Kagura was here, despite her snarky attitude and annoying commentary. Her company was likely the only thing preventing his sanity from deteriorating. Not that he would ever tell her this, infuriating little wench that she was. He had a feeling that she was grateful for his presence as well, not that she would ever admit it aloud either.

She gasped suddenly, causing Inuyasha to perk up in sudden interest.

"Holy shit…is that _green?_ "

It was, the hanyou was ecstatic to discover. Peeking over a wall of rock just up ahead was a hint of forest green, which swayed gently in the breeze. Inuyasha cautiously dared to hope that he wasn’t seeing things, that it really was the top of a tree beckoning to him from behind the rock. Kagura accelerated, but the seconds seemed to stretch for hours as they grew closer to discovering whether this really was a potentially life-saving find, or merely a mutual hallucination inspired by hunger and thirst. When they finally crested the rock wall and got an unhindered view of what lay beyond, their jaws dropped.

It was beyond anything they could have hoped for. The tall tree they had spotted loomed above a small forest, nestled in this tiny, inexplicable utopia. Next to the forest sat a pristine lake, fed by a gorgeous waterfall. Fruit grew on the trees, and fish leapt from the lake, catching insects. It was as if an unspoiled piece of feudal Japan had been magically removed from the living world and deposited into this one. It was breathtaking. Inuyasha and Kagura beamed at each other, previous irritation forgotten, as they landed in the tranquil meadow by the lake. Both of them thoroughly enjoyed the feel of the grass tickling their feet as they ran down to the water. It was the only thing they wanted more than food at the moment.

Inuyasha was a little quicker and arrived at the water’s edge first. He moved to dip his hands into the crystal clear liquid, inhaling deeply through his nose to sample the delectable scent. In his excitement he almost missed it, the iota of a scent which should not be there. Though he couldn’t identify them, the miniscule airborne particles inspired an insistent sense of wrongness, which was just barely strong enough to reach the logical part of his brain. His hands froze, mere millimeters above the water’s surface. He had no time to contemplate this new development before Kagura sank to her knees beside him and happily reached for the water, heedless of his sudden pause.

"Wait, Kagura!" he ordered, throwing his arm out to stop her. It accidentally whacked her on the chin, which she obviously didn’t appreciate, but his desperate attempt to restrain her had been successful. She sat back on her heels, glaring at him as she rubbed her chin.

"What the hell is wrong with you?!"

"Don’t drink the water. Don’t even touch it."

"What?! Why the hell not?"

Now that was an interesting question, one Inuyasha was unable to answer immediately. He bent down and sniffed the water from up close, growling when he smelled only its natural aroma. But he was _sure_ he’d detected something else. It had been just for an instant, but that mysterious, sinister scent had chilled his blood. Had he imagined it? No matter how hard he strained, he could perceive nothing out of the ordinary now. His five senses were completely satisfied that this place was legitimate and free of danger, from the sight of the glistening waterfall to the feel of the damp earth underneath his toes. Closing his eyes, he stretched out his youki and likewise felt no other youki signatures brushing against his consciousness, aside from Kagura’s increasingly annoyed aura. But there _was_ something wrong. He couldn’t put his finger on it, but it was there; he was _not_ imagining it. The fact that he was picking it up with some kind of seventh or eighth sense didn’t make it any less real. Right?

"This is wrong," he stated quietly, officially weirded out by the situation and still not entirely sure of himself.

"What the hell are you talking about?" Kagura groaned, equally frustrated and bewildered.

"This," Inuyasha declared, more firmly this time, motioning to the false utopia surrounding them. "This whole place…it doesn’t feel right."

"Doesn’t _feel_ right?" the wind sorceress repeated incredulously, reaching a hand up to massage her temple. Her aura flared even further, and it seemed as though she was struggling to keep her temper in check.

"Inuyasha, I’ll give you a pass on this one. You’re exhausted and famished. Or maybe the jewel shard is screwing with your head. I don’t know, and I don’t really care. But don’t fucking _tell_ me not to drink this water!"

"That’s what I’m fuckin’ telling you, Kagura!" he retorted, foregoing his usual insulting term of endearment due to the gravity of the situation. He got right in her face, hoping she would see how serious he was. No such luck.

"You can do whatever you want, Inuyasha. Go ahead and starve yourself to death for all I care. Me? I’m having a fucking drink."

"No, don’t—"

But it was too late; by the time he managed to grab her wrists, she had already dipped her hands into the lake. Instantly, the world as they knew it ceased to be. The sky darkened, casting the land in ominous shadow. The trees shifted in color from healthy green to pallid shades of yellow and orange, and the sea of grass surrounding them withered and died. A fiercely cold wind blew in, stripping the leaves from the trees and scattering them across the land, sad testaments to life which had been so suddenly and brutally snuffed out. A patch of ice formed on the spot where Kagura had touched the water, quickly spreading to cover the entire lake as the flow over the falls slowed to a trickle and finally stopped completely. Still the wind howled, biting at their flesh and growing colder by the second.

It was not the sudden drop in temperature which caused the hairs on the back of Inuyasha’s neck to stand on end, however. It wasn’t the smell of death in the air or the way in which their oasis had suddenly decayed before their eyes. No, what filled him with dread more powerful than any he’d ever experienced, was the man-sized circular opening at the back of the waterfall, now no longer concealed by the falls. It could not be defined as a cave, for even the darkest caves will be illuminated at their entrances by ambient light from the outside. This void, for lack of a better term, was different. On one side of that cursed gateway was light, and on the other lay total darkness. And from that darkness emanated the single most frightening aura Inuyasha had ever felt. It was ancient, older than any youkai, and contained more hate and malice than even the most tainted piece of the Shikon no Tama. No creature of the living world could compare to it.

Something emerged from the void, as black as the emptiness from whence it came, something long and snake-like. It slithered along the frozen surface of the lake, before finally pulling itself upright a few meters from Inuyasha and Kagura. It was a woman, they were shocked to discover. Her form was shrouded, almost ghostly, but her eyes glowed a venomous shade of blue, and her mouth hung ravenously open, revealing blackened and rotten teeth. She was, to her terrified quarry, the very epitome of death.

 _"We are the Yomotsu-shikome,"_ she rasped in a voice as frightening as her appearance. _"Come with us, you who do not belong in this world. We will devour your bodies, and take your souls to hell."_ Then, as the apparition closed in on her prey, a second figure emerged from the void behind her. And a third.

It was the rapidly intensifying scent of Kagura’s fear which broke Inuyasha from his stupor. As he grabbed her arm, she too seemed to snap out of the almost hypnotic trance she had fallen under. She gazed at him with wide, petrified eyes, clearly wanting nothing more than to flee from this place without looking back. Inuyasha couldn’t agree more. Normally, running away from a fight would be repugnant to him, but his instincts were telling him that flight was the correct response in this situation. The fact that he was scared shitless also helped.

"Let’s get the fuck out of here."

Kagura did not need to be told twice. She immediately deployed her feather, only waiting long enough for Inuyasha to leap aboard before taking off at top speed. An inhuman screech rang out behind them, soon joined by several others, until the hanyou could no longer tell how many individual voices there were. The number eight came to mind for some reason, but he didn’t know why. And there was no time to figure it out; if there was one thing those chilling vocalizations had confirmed for him, it was that he and Kagura were not out of the woods yet.

He could feel the aura of corruption and death trailing them, as they wound their way through the maze of rock formations as quickly as the wind sorceress could manage. Even so, he still had to psych himself up for a moment to gather the courage necessary to turn and face that evil again. His heart nearly stopped at the sight which greeted him—no less than sixteen blue eyes, shining in the gloom like beacons. There truly were eight specters pursuing them, and closing fast.

"Shit, they’re gaining on us!"

"What the hell are those things?" Kagura demanded, keeping her eyes on the terrain ahead of her.

"No fucking idea! Can’t we go any faster?"

"Not unless I lighten the load!"

She punctuated this remark with a sharp turn which had her partner holding on for dear life. Inuyasha could tell that nearly dislodging him was unintentional on her part, however. She was pushing herself as hard as she could, testing the limits of her power and skill. One slip, one miscalculated turn, and they would careen into a wall. At this point, it sounded like death by blunt force trauma might be the more merciful way to go. But even if they didn’t crash, the Yomotsu-shikome would catch them in a matter of moments at this rate. And with Kagura’s wild maneuvering, he didn’t trust himself to maintain enough balance to do anything more than sit and wait for death. They needed a new strategy.

"Take us higher!" he shouted, and Kagura complied without hesitation, as if she’d been thinking along similar lines. Both noticed that the white mist which had previously shrouded this entire world had completely disappeared. Instead, dark clouds loomed high above, flashing with lightning as thunder boomed in their ears. The heavens seemed ready to open up above them, and hell was hot on their heels. The Yomotsu-shikome were still gaining on them, but not as quickly. Kagura could fly faster in the open air, but not fast enough to outpace them. Being out of the maze had other advantages, however.

"Hold us steady!" Inuyasha told her, standing shakily on the feather and drawing his sword. He bared his fangs, tightening his grip on the hilt as Tetsusaiga’s power and his own exploded around him. His will to live overrode his fear; there was no way he was going to die today.

"All right, you undead bitches!" he snarled, transforming Tetsusaiga into its diamond spear form. "Go back to whatever hell you came from!"

His bravado was short-lived. Neither the Kongousouha nor a subsequent Kaze no Kizu did much to slow their pursuers, who seemed to be able to reform shortly after taking any amount of damage. The diamond spears passed right through them and Tetsusaiga’s youki merely sliced them up for a moment or two. Inuyasha’s efforts bought him and Kagura some extra breathing room, but did little else.

"Shit!"

"You got any other bright ideas?" the wind sorceress asked dryly. None were forthcoming. "Good," she announced, "hang on!"

Inuyasha spun around and gripped both sides of the feather, as Kagura sent it plummeting toward the rocks below. The hanyou wanted to ask her what the hell she was doing, but his words lodged in his throat. Not that she would have heard him anyway, over the wind whipping past their ears and the screeching of predators closing in for the kill. Then Inuyasha’s stomach lodged somewhere in his bowels as she pulled out of the dive, scraping the bottom of the feather against the ground as she fought against inertia’s mighty pull. But she managed to right them without crashing, which could not be said of several of the Yomotsu-shikome, which smashed themselves against the ground only to reform and rejoin the pursuit. Now Inuyasha did demand to know what Kagura was doing, but her only response was to pull out her fan.

"Fuujin no Mai!" she cried, sending her signature wind blades carving through the air. But her unexpected target mystified Inuyasha for a moment; instead of being directed at their pursuers, her attack struck the base of a large rock pillar just up ahead. It was dozens of meters tall, and at least a dozen meters thick, weighted toward the top and relatively thin at the bottom by some strange happenstance of nature. It wasn’t until the base of the pillar crumbled and the entire thing began toppling over that Inuyasha comprehended Kagura’s plan. Even then, it was unclear whether she’d gotten the timing right. But it was far too late to turn back. Both of them cried out in fear and determination as the rock came down, the evil aura creeping ever closer at their backs. At the last moment they ducked and closed their eyes. Inuyasha felt something brush against the back of his robes…

Then they were through, in the open air again. The shock of the tremendous impact directly behind them nearly caused the feather to fatally destabilize, but Kagura managed to maintain control. She turned them sideways so both of them could view the carnage, grinning victoriously. No trace of the Yomotsu-shikome remained; they had been completely buried under the mass of the fallen pillar, which had shattered into chunks of all sizes upon impact. May this mound of rubble be their grave for all eternity.

"Nice one, Kagura," Inuyasha stated honestly, holding up his hand in a gesture of genuine comradery. The wind sorceress grinned and moved to clasp it when suddenly the air around them became stale, the dreadful aura returning with a vengeance as thunder boomed with renewed vigor above them. Both combatants slowly turned their heads, praying that their eyes would not confirm what their other senses were already telling them. Again, no such luck. Black smoke rose ethereally from tiny cracks in the rock, swirling and condensing into eight distinct masses.

"Shit," both of them swore at once. And just as those sixteen glowing blue eyes began to reappear one by one, Kagura turned her feather and set off at top speed. She soared above the jagged landscape, attempting to put as much distance as possible between them and their pursuers. But it wouldn’t be enough. It would never be enough. The great unearthly screeching was punctuated this time by a tremendous flash of lighting which lit up the entire sky. The clap of thunder hitting them barely a second later caused both fighters to flinch in fear. Next came the rain, which caused Inuyasha to hiss in discomfort. He swore aloud at the stinging pain in his ears, but knew there was nothing he could do about it. Compared to the specters chasing them, acidic precipitation was a mere nuisance.

"This world is rejecting us," Kagura observed grimly, using her fan to establish a cushion of wind in front of them, deflecting the worst of the rain. It was true, Inuyasha realized. The Yomotsu-shikome had said they didn’t belong here, and it seemed as though this entire plane of existence now bent to their will.

"You just had to touch that fucking water!" Inuyasha growled, lashing out not so much at Kagura, but at his rapidly growing sense of helplessness.

"Save it!" she snapped. "Bitch at me all you want later. Think of a way out of this first."

"Yeah, you too, since your last idea was so great."

"Well, your first idea was pretty shitty too!"

Inuyasha couldn’t argue with that. Instead, he turned his focus toward getting them out of this mess. But as the Yomotsu-shikome closed in, those piercing eyes showing through the gloom, he completely drew a blank. What could they do? These evil wenches were impervious to their attacks, and could apparently survive anything. It seemed completely hopeless. Still, Inuyasha refused to give up; he had too much to live for. He brandished Tetsusaiga, vowing to fight until the last breath of air left his lungs, and his heart throbbed for the final time. Unfortunately, Tetsusaiga’s attacks were no more effective than before, despite his resolve.

" _That’s_ your idea?!" Kagura shrieked in panicked outrage. "Try the same shit that didn’t work before?!"

"I’m not hearing any—better—ideas from you, bitch!" Inuyasha retorted, his statement punctuated by a grunt of exertion.

"I should drop your useless ass and escape alone," she muttered, which actually caused her companion to smile grimly. This was the second time she had mentioned that particular option, but he sensed that she was no closer to following through with it now than she’d been before. He figured that if she was going to attempt to dislodge him, she would have already done so. And she certainly wouldn’t warn him first. Maybe it was the mutually lethal situation they found themselves in, but a bond of sorts had been forged between them. He trusted her to do her best to save both of them, not just herself. Hopefully she could come up with a better strategy than he could, and soon. For even Tetsusaiga’s limited effectiveness was about to be reduced. It was at this point that the Yomotsu-shikome proved that they were not mindless ghouls. After all eight were once again cut apart by a single Kaze no Kizu, they spread out, both horizontally and vertically. Inuyasha was suddenly confronted by a collection of targets which he couldn’t engage simultaneously if he tried. And they were still gaining.

They kept coming, despite the sheer magnitude of the youki rolling off Tetsusaiga, great bursts of unadulterated violence which would have slain thousands of mortal enemies by now. But it wasn’t enough; with each specter momentarily dispatched, the others closed the gap. Soon some were flying almost directly alongside their prey, even more spread out and difficult to target. Kagura joined her ally in attempting to repulse them, but her wind blades did little damage. With a bone-chilling screech, one of the dark specters swooped in from the side. Inuyasha, fearful of the consequences but seeing no alternative, sliced it in half with Tetsusaiga. Instead of dissipating immediately, however, the enemy’s disembodied form swirled around the blade, like a swarm of biting insects. Inuyasha wrenched his weapon away, cringing at the sickening pulse the sword emitted, which set his arm ablaze with pain and caused his stomach to roil with nausea. Tetsusaiga held its transformed state, and quickly regained its previous vigor, but Inuyasha was not so lucky. One indirect touch from the specter had been enough to make him physically ill. His father’s fang might be resilient enough to challenge these creatures, but he was not. How were they ever going to survive this?

Kagura saved him from an attack he didn’t see coming with a great sweep of her fan, but the reprieve was short-lived. The next thing Inuyasha knew, a Yomotsu-shikome was flying directly at him, her maw at least a half meter agape and her eyes gleaming with hunger.

"Up!" he yelled, and Kagura complied almost instantaneously. Inuyasha’s reflexes couldn’t have done any better, but the ‘almost’ would prove most costly.

The great ghostly jaws clamped down on the back of the feather instead of Inuyasha’s torso, missing the hanyou’s toes by mere centimeters. He sliced the specter apart with Tetsusaiga, grinding his teeth together and growling as the distressing feelings in his body intensified. He gasped as a new, more familiar sensation blossomed near his waist, on the right side where he was keeping the— _Oh, shit._ If the Shikon no Tama became corrupted, he was totally screwed. It hadn’t grown worse until the Yomotsu-shikome got really close to him, and it was holding steady now, but this new revelation made their outlook even less optimistic, if that was possible.

It was. An insistent hissing sound caused him to look down, only to see the feather literally dissolving beneath his feet. Acrid smoke spewed forth as the affected area spread from the bite mark like a miasma. Suddenly desperate to prevent the acidic substance from touching himself or Kagura, and seeing no other alternative, Inuyasha grabbed her around the waist and toppled them over the side. What remained of the feather vaporized completely above them as they fell, and Inuyasha braced for the impact, turning so Kagura was on top of him. The wind sorceress reacted quickly and softened the landing with a gust from her fan. But she dared not slow their descent too much, for their enemy was now diving down upon them like zombified falcons.

"Ruuuja no Mai!" she cried, rising into a kneeling position by Inuyasha’s side. In an impressive display of expertise, she summoned eight powerful tornadoes, each one enveloping an individual Yomotsu-shikome. She remained crouched as Inuyasha climbed to his feet, focusing all of her concentration on maintaining the miniature prisons, which began to shift and combine into one massive twister. For a fleeting moment, there was hope. Then the air cycling through the tornadoes gradually darkened to black. Sparks burst from Kagura’s fan just before the entire thing erupted in blue flame. The wind sorceress screamed and dropped her weapon, which didn’t even reach the ground before the conflagration consumed it. She stumbled back clutching her charred appendage, as the smell of scorched flesh joined the panoply of unpleasant aromas already polluting the air. The same ear-piercing screech echoed across the landscape, this one seemingly louder and crueler than ever before. Fortunately for our heroes, Inuyasha was ready. A fresh Kaze no Kizu decimated the clustered enemy, buying a few precious seconds to take action.

"Go, Kagura!" he ordered, sprinting away from her. He’d noticed that she always wore two feathers in her hair, and hoped the second one could transform as well. At any rate, there was nothing he could do to protect her right now. The only remaining option was to seek an end to this confrontation. He had a plan—a bad one, but better than nothing. It had come to him while watching Kagura’s fan spontaneously combust; he’d reflected that at least they still had his sword, when it hit him. Tetsusaiga was his father’s fang. Totosai had added his tooth to the blade to repair it, and he’d come a long way in terms of mastering it and making it his own, but the sword’s core was still a memento of the Inu no Taisho, one of the most powerful youkai who ever lived. It was time to test his father’s strength against the ferocity of hell’s agents. He would use Tetsusaiga’s most basic innate ability, the only one which had been readily apparent since even before Kagome pulled it from the stone. This strategy involved great personal risk—the odds were quite good that he would perish—but this was the only way that he and Kagura stood a chance of surviving the next several minutes.

"Follow me, you ugly bitches!"

The Yomotsu-shikome did not need to be told; Inuyasha could sense them closing in behind him as he sprinted toward the cave he had spotted a few moments ago. Over time, he had developed a habit of scanning his surroundings when he entered an unfamiliar environment. So as Kagura attempted to restrain the specters with her wind, he’d noticed this crevice in the rock off to the side. It was small, only a little taller than he was and half as wide, but it looked like it went deep enough for his purposes. He prayed that he hadn’t miscalculated, or this rift in the rock would become his tomb. He sheathed Tetsusaiga just before crossing the threshold, knowing there wasn’t enough room to wield the sword inside.

After a dozen meters, the walls narrowed so that he could proceed no further, and he turned to face his pursuers. The Yomotsu-shikome paused, sadistically savoring the moment before a kill, as most evil creatures are wont to do. Inuyasha had counted on it. Pulling aside the collar of his robes, he dug his claws into the flesh between his neck and shoulder, making sure his fingers were saturated with blood. This was no time for subtlety. He unleased the Hijin Ketsusou on the unsuspecting enemy, the crimson blades of youki shredding them into disembodied mist once more. It was into this malevolent haze that Inuyasha charged, holding the sleeve of his haori over his face and staying as low to the ground as possible.

Indescribable agony assailed him, but he somehow restrained himself to a throaty grunt. He dared not open his eyes or his mouth, nor release the breath he was holding. The air was no longer air, but poison. It attacked his exposed feet and hands, so fiercely that Inuyasha was sure it was peeling the skin off layer by layer. He nearly fell when the enemy slipped inside his robes, a thousand lashes scourging his back in an instant. But he stumbled through, the enraged screeching muffled by the blood pooling in his ears. The going was slightly easier now, but the curse had infiltrated his body, become a part of him. The only question was how far he could go before he succumbed to it.

With his other senses overwhelmed, Inuyasha didn’t open his eyes until he was sure he was nearly out of the cave. His instincts had served him well; his estimate was only a step or two off. He dove toward the open air and rolled into the light, scrambling to grab Tetsusaiga’s scabbard with shaky, blood-soaked hands. Finally the wood came free of his obi, and he wedged it into the cave entrance, just as the Yomotsu-shikome lunged for him. He felt a surge of Tetsusaiga’s youki, but was unable to tell whether his desperate attempt had been successful. His eyes burned as though assailed by the rays of a thousand suns, and when he opened his mouth to scream, the fire spread to his lungs.

He collapsed onto his back, writhing in agony of near infinite intensity. His vision blurred to blood-red, then flickered to black as his eyes ceased to function. The corrupted fragment of the Shikon no Tama assaulted his mind, reinforced by the pain of his melting flesh. Inuyasha’s mental defenses crumbled under the dual onslaught. He could feel his youkai side clamoring for release, his very life in mortal danger. It was too much; he had reached his breaking point. But even as he surrendered his consciousness, his thoughts drifted back to his reason for living, two souls within one body.

If he somehow came back from this…he would remember them.

* * *

Kagura swore under her breath, feeling thoroughly disgusted with herself. _He told me to ‘go,’ then ran off. What else was I supposed to do?_ It was a sound argument, but the guilt remained. Maybe it had been her fear, or the pain from her burned hand, but she’d fled alone without hesitation as soon as Inuyasha told her to. She’d hopped on her spare feather and soared off into the dim sky, without looking back. And she felt terrible about it. _Dammit…when did I learn to give a shit?_

She turned the feather around, flying quickly yet cautiously back to where she’d left her hanyou companion. He must’ve had some sort of plan to run off like that, and he’d certainly gotten all of the Yomotsu-shikome to follow him. She just hoped they weren’t busy devouring his flesh right about now. But she needed to find out for sure, and help him if she could. She owed him that much at least.

The sight which greeted her when she landed on that Kami-forsaken patch of rock was horrifying beyond all description. She doubled over at the waist, dry heaving due to her empty stomach, spitting on the ground in a futile attempt to rid her mouth of the taste of bile. But though she desperately didn’t want to, she forced herself to look once more, to gaze upon the man who had sacrificed everything in order to save her.

Inuyasha…was no longer Inuyasha. His crimson eyes stared up at the sky, unblinking, endless seas of red devoid of any semblance of humanity. He writhed on the ground, his arms seizing almost rhythmically, fingers curled inwardly as if to claw at whatever invisible force assailed him. A constant, agonized snarl rumbled in his throat, occasionally choked off by fluid which made him gurgle and gasp for air. Kagura thought to roll him over, so he wouldn’t suffocate on his own blood, but was afraid to touch him, or even approach. She could actually see his youki at work, healing his flesh even as whatever the Yomotsu-shikome had done to him melted it away. But it looked like a losing battle. It might take hours or even days at this rate, but eventually, Inuyasha would be consumed completely.

Kagura could only imagine the amount of pain he must be experiencing, and hoped that his conscious mind had long since shut down. But while that would ease his suffering, it wouldn’t make it any easier to save him, which was something Kagura desperately wanted to do. Was there even anything she could do, at this point? The Yomotsu-shikome were imprisoned by Tetsusaiga’s barrier, which she realized had been Inuyasha’s goal in his borderline suicidal stunt. Logically, their hold over the hanyou might be released if they were killed, but then if she or Inuyasha had known of a way to accomplish that objective, he wouldn’t be in this sorry state in the first place. He wouldn’t be thrashing on the ground in agony, reduced to a mindless animal locked in what were starting to look disturbingly like death throes.

Kagura closed her eyes, somehow finding within her the resolve to do what needed to be done. She would give it a little more time, try with all of her intelligence to imagine a way to save him. But if that final effort failed…she would put him out of his misery. Again, she owed him that much at least.

"What has happened to him?"

That familiar, disinterested male voice sounding from directly behind her caused Kagura to jump almost half a meter in the air, as she turned to find none other than Sesshoumaru standing there regally. He gazed down at his half-brother with a neutral expression, but the wind sorceress swore she caught a glimpse of some strong emotion in those normally cold eyes. Was it pity for Inuyasha, or anger toward whatever creature had done this to him? Kagura would never know; it was gone literally in the blink of an eye. She also didn’t know all of the history the two half-brothers shared, having only recently learned that Inuyasha was responsible for the loss of Sesshoumaru’s left arm. It was no wonder there was no love lost between them. But it was comforting to learn that even Sesshoumaru cared for his half-brother in some small way. Whether the elder inu-youkai could or would actually help the hanyou was another matter. Kagura hoped his only solution wouldn’t be the ‘merciful’ one she had thought of already.

"Those _things_ attacked us," she spat, pointing a shaking hand in the direction of the cave where the imprisoned specters were still making quite a racket as they fought against Tetsusaiga’s barrier. "They called themselves the Yomotsu-shikome. Inuyasha trapped them in there, but…I guess they caught him in the process."

Sesshoumaru snorted haughtily. "The eight hags of hell, huh?" he pondered, as if the creatures were of no consequence. As if they were a collection of weaklings that no competent warrior should have any trouble with. Kagura bristled at the thinly-veiled insult, but bit her tongue. Based on Sesshoumaru’s line of inquiry, she was cautiously optimistic that he did indeed intend to help Inuyasha. The last thing she wanted to do was antagonize him; in her experience, males could be extremely fickle, especially those who believed themselves superior to everyone else. Oh, yes, she’d had plenty of experience with those types.

Sesshoumaru placed his hand on the sword at his hip, not the broadsword he periodically tried to slice Naraku up with, but the thin, curved weapon Kagura had never seen him wield before. He looked down at the hilt as he grasped it, almost as if he was communicating with the sword.

"Hmph, so he is beyond even Tenseiga’s ability to heal," he muttered, turning away from Inuyasha and striding confidently over to the cave. The Yomotsu-shikome increased their screeching and struggling at his approach, perhaps growing more determined to escape with additional prey nearby. Sesshoumaru’s firm countenance never wavered, as he finally drew his chosen weapon.

"Come here," he ordered, to which Kagura reluctantly obeyed. "Remove Tetsusaiga, then get out of my way," he told her next.

Kagura nearly balked at that, but her conscience held her in place. That, and the absolute conviction in Sesshoumaru’s tone. Figuring he wasn’t about to do something likely to get himself killed, she decided to believe in him, as she believed him capable of slaying Naraku. Still, she made sure her lone remaining feather was clutched tightly in her left hand, just in case this went badly. In that situation, she promised to end Inuyasha’s suffering as she fled for her life. Those undead bitches might get him, but they wouldn’t get him alive.

"Tetsusaiga," Sesshoumaru said aloud, shifting into a fighting stance. "You must allow her to touch you."

Kagura reached for the sword, hesitating at his words, but the barrier did not repulse her, though it still held the Yomotsu-shikome at bay. Grasping the scabbard firmly in her hand, she glanced up to Sesshoumaru. He nodded once without taking his eyes off the enemy, and after a deep breath to steady her nerves, Kagura yanked the sword from the cave entrance. She scrambled away, watching the battle as she prepared to fly at a moment’s notice.

The first Yomotsu-shikome came screaming from the cave, impossibly wide jaws aiming to clamp down on Sesshoumaru’s head. The daiyoukai calmly swung his sword, cleanly cleaving the specter in half down the middle. Whatever Kagura was expecting, what happened next caught her completely by surprise. Whereas all previous attacks had resulted in the Yomotsu-shikome becoming disembodied for a moment and then reforming, Sesshoumaru’s strike caused an entirely different reaction. Fervent, vivid blue light emanated from either side of the cut, nearly blinding in its intensity. The doomed creature released a new kind of screech as Tenseiga’s light rapidly consumed its form.

The ensuing silence was deafening. The remaining Yomotsu-shikome were reduced to a state of shock, having probably never met someone capable of defeating them before. And now, instead of merely being prevented from pursuing prey, they found themselves cornered, confronted by a man who clearly intended to show no mercy. Kagura smirked in the background, knowing that she was going to enjoy this very much.

The battle was short and sweet. The Yomotsu-shikome burst from the cave as one and spiraled in all directions. Sesshoumaru exhibited his lightning reflexes and supernatural speed, slaying six of the creatures before they made it more than a few meters from the entrance. The seventh managed to sneak past him and flee, but he had no difficulty in catching up and dispatching it. And the instant the last Yomotsu-shikome perished, Inuyasha’s agonized snarling ceased.

Kagura cautiously crept closer to his side, wondering whether his true hanyou self would return. Only Inuyasha’s ragged breathing could be heard, as his body healed unhindered by the evil curse. His pupils returned, startlingly white, and framed by ardent blue irises. A low growl rumbled in his throat, as he rolled himself onto his side, turning his savage glare her way. Kagura stumbled back in fear, and was glad when Sesshoumaru landed by her side, his hand grasping the hilt of his other sword, the one which he used to engage enemies in the living world. The daiyoukai stood his ground as his half-brother lurched to his feet, his furious reverberations intensifying as he audibly cracked his knuckles. Like a wounded animal, the hanyou-turned-youkai prepared to lash out indiscriminately, unable or unwilling to distinguish between friend and foe. Suddenly the growling lowered in timbre, as Inuyasha seemed to come back to himself somewhat. He still appeared ready to attack at any moment, but there was a certain awareness in his gaze which hadn’t been there before.

"Give him Tetsusaiga," Sesshoumaru told her, and Kagura complied, tossing the sword to its owner. Inuyasha’s hand shot out and caught the weapon in mid-air, and immediately a drastic change swept over him. He gasped sharply and clutched at his chest, staggering as his head shook rapidly from side to side. He squeezed his eyes shut, and when they opened again, his usual amber orbs were back. _Inuyasha_ was back. Kagura slumped in relief, even as the hanyou collapsed to his hands and knees, coughing uncontrollably and spitting up blood. He clearly wasn’t even close to fully healed yet, but his body, and more importantly his mind, were apparently going to survive this horrifying ordeal. A quiet sense of accomplishment settled over Kagura, but more than anything else, she felt gratitude toward the man who had become her partner as they fought for their lives. She would not be alive without him. The opposite was also true, but her own role paled in comparison to the sacrifice he’d almost made. And while she would never wish to reciprocate that particular action, she did hope she would have the opportunity to repay him someday.

"Inuyasha."

At Sesshoumaru’s announcement of his name, the hanyou raised his head to meet his half-brother’s stern, disapproving glare. Then he slowly and painfully straightened his back, so he was leaning upright before the daiyoukai on his knees. He seemed ready to try putting his feet underneath him next, but Sesshoumaru never gave him the chance, sending him sprawling with a vicious closed-fist strike to the side of his face.

"Sesshoumaru! What the hell are you doing?!" Kagura yelled, but he ignored her. Part of her wanted to go to Inuyasha’s defense, but her instincts told her that interfering would be a mistake. Besides, she had about as much chance of stopping Sesshoumaru as she did of killing Naraku. Fortunately, it did not appear that the daiyoukai had any further intention of worsening his half-brother’s condition. He strode up to the fallen hanyou and stood there, waiting.

Once his head stopped spinning, Inuyasha gritted his teeth and swore under his breath. He was already in rough shape physically, and mentally he’d just recovered from yet another full-youkai transformation. So why the hell had Sesshoumaru—who’d apparently just saved him from the Yomotsu-shikome—found it necessary to knock him on his ass with a cheap shot? Granted, there was absolutely nothing he could do to defend himself against such a powerful opponent right now. If Sesshoumaru wanted him dead, then he was dead, plain and simple. But if that was the case, he wouldn’t be still breathing. So then what the hell was his half-brother’s problem?

"Sess…bastard…the fuck?" was all he could manage, but it got the message across.

"That is for defiling Chichi-ue’s grave," Sesshoumaru replied evenly.

Inuyasha almost laughed, but he knew that would hurt like a bitch, so he restrained himself to an amused grimace. _For such a stupid reason…what a bastard._ No doubt the conceited prick had seen the hole in their father’s torso and blamed him, though in reality it had been Housenki’s doing. Raising his head to glare at his half-brother once more, Inuyasha noticed the massive skeleton looming in the background. Even though he and Kagura had been fleeing in blind panic, they’d instinctively moved toward ‘home.’ _Good thing, too. That’s probably how Sesshoumaru found us before it was too late._ That thought raised other questions, however, and it was high time they were answered. After he made a pride-saving rise to his feet, of course. That was easier said than done, but he managed without letting out more than a few pained grunts. And fortunately, his bastard half-brother didn’t deem it necessary to knock him on his ass again. Apparently, he’d only offended Sesshoumaru’s delicate sensibilities once today.

"What happened?" he asked, secretly hoping that the person he liked more at the moment would fill him in. She did, Kagura seeming more than happy to provide the details he was looking for. And as she spoke, he recalled the thread of memory which had informed him right away that there would be eight Yomotsu-shikome. His mother had told him the myth long ago, about how Izanagi had journeyed to the underworld to rescue his wife, Izanami, then fled at her horrid appearance and was pursued by the ‘hags of hell.’ Thus began the phenomenon known as death. Inuyasha wasn’t sure he believed the legend, but the Yomotsu-shikome had certainly proven real enough. _This world is a boundary between the living world and the underworld. That oasis must be a trap for living creatures who become stuck in this world. As soon as they try to eat or drink, the Yomotsu-shikome come and devour them, then take their souls to hell. Those bitches are creatures from the underworld…no wonder Tetsusaiga couldn’t cut them._

Now Tenseiga’s effectiveness against the seemingly invulnerable specters made perfect sense. The sword, while less visually impressive than Tetsusaiga, was a truly amazing weapon in its own right. It was probably one of the few capable of defeating spirits from hell, and Sesshoumaru had wielded it with no small amount of skill. _Great, something_ else _for him to be arrogant about._ Without the sword, the daiyoukai would have been just as helpless against the Yomotsu-shikome as anyone else. But try telling _him_ that; obviously, Inuyasha decided not to waste his breath. Tenseiga had likely allowed Sesshoumaru to pass through the gateway guarded by those two living statues as well. As for why he’d bothered coming here in the first place, well, that mystery was solved as soon as Kagura finished her story.

"So, Inuyasha," Sesshoumaru stated condescendingly, "your vassal tells me that you possess something which Naraku desires greatly. Give it to me."

Inuyasha’s eyes widened, his hand automatically drifting to where the Shikon fragment was nestled against his side. _Shit!_ This was not good. He couldn’t fight Sesshoumaru now, but he absolutely could _not_ simply give him the jewel shard. He needed it in order to get Kagome back; he couldn’t trust Sesshoumaru to look out for her well-being if it came to a battle against Naraku. Obviously that’s what his half-brother was seeking, for his own selfish ends. Inuyasha had far more important concerns, but convincing the cold daiyoukai of that was going to be next to impossible. Still, he had to try.

"I can’t do that, Sesshoumaru."

The inu-youkai narrowed his eyes. "You will surrender the fragment, or this Sesshoumaru shall take it by force."

Inuyasha narrowly resisted the urge to curse aloud. "You know I can’t stop you from taking it," he admitted. "Not with how I’m wounded. I’m _asking_ you to let me keep it. I need it to—"

"Your needs and desires are of no concern to me."

Inuyasha grimaced. _I was afraid of that._ "Look, Sesshoumaru, I’m _not_ handing the shard over. You can take it if you want to. But know that I’ll fucking hunt you down as soon as I’m healed. I need that shard. I need to _be there_ when Naraku comes to take it." Sudden inspiration struck him, a possible way to satisfy Sesshoumaru and keep the shard at the same time. It was a long shot, but it was worth a try.

"I don’t give a shit about Naraku," he declared. "Stick around until he shows, and you can have him all to yourself. All I care about is Kagome." Sesshoumaru seemed to be pondering his proposal, but Inuyasha knew that his silence was far from acceptance.

"Do you want me to get down on my knees and fucking _beg?_ " he demanded, growing desperate. His pride was now even more battered than the rest of him, but he didn’t care. He needed to show Sesshoumaru how determined he was to keep the jewel shard in his possession. He would literally do anything. And perhaps his half-brother was beginning to understand that.

"You would pledge to refrain from interfering when this Sesshoumaru engages Naraku?"

"Yes!" Inuyasha answered excitedly. "I swear on my life not to interfere. Naraku is yours."

Sesshoumaru’s golden eyes bored into his own, as if to say ‘should you break that vow, your life is forfeit.’ Inuyasha nodded, understanding well the implications of what had just transpired. If he went against his word, Sesshoumaru would take it as an insult against his honor. And Inuyasha had no doubt he would follow through with his unspoken threat.

"Very well," the daiyoukai declared. Then, without another word, he took off into the sky, soaring aloft with his long mokomoko-sama trailing behind him.

"O-oi! Wait, you bastard!" Inuyasha called after him, but was promptly ignored. Logically, Sesshoumaru would have to wait for him since he still possessed the jewel shard, but Inuyasha didn’t want to do anything which might cause the bastard to change his mind about that. _Man…he couldn’t even give me a few minutes to rest?_ Obviously not. So Inuyasha was doubly grateful when Kagura appeared before him, hovering on her feather a little less than a meter off the ground—perfect height for flopping down onto his backside. And because he was so appreciative, he could let her amused smirk go without comment. He sighed in bliss as the burden of bearing his body weight was lifted from his legs. As they followed his half-brother into the sky, Inuyasha took an inventory of his condition. His body wasn’t in terrible shape anymore; much of the skin he’d lost had grown back, and there weren’t any gaping wounds. His eyes were functional, though not yet fully recovered by any means. By far the biggest issue was all the blood he’d lost. His body would need time to replenish, especially since he hadn’t eaten in several days. But his youki was strong, and fortunately the Yomotsu-shikome’s curse had been lifted before it did too much damage.

That was perhaps the most perplexing thing in a very perplexing day—why had Sesshoumaru helped him? He could easily have taken the Shikon fragment and left him to die. Instead, he’d slain the Yomotsu-shikome and saved his life. It made little sense; this was the arrogant prick who tried to kill him almost every time they met, after all. The key word being _almost_ , Inuyasha reflected. At their last encounter, Sesshoumaru had merely informed him of Kikyou’s demise and left. Two meetings ago, they’d briefly fought against Naraku together at the latter’s castle. And the time before that…well, this actually wasn’t the first time Sesshoumaru had saved his life, come to think of it. After his transformation during the battle against Gatenmaru, his half-brother had beaten him down so that Kagome could give him Tetsusaiga. When asked why he hadn’t taken the opportunity to slaughter him, Sesshoumaru had responded that taking his life held ‘no value’ because of his transformed state. Perhaps the same rationale applied to the situation this afternoon. Yet, it wasn’t exactly the same. The more he thought about it, the more Inuyasha came to the conclusion that his half-brother didn’t truly desire to kill him anymore. Or at least, doing so wasn’t high on his list of priorities.

Still, Inuyasha wouldn’t let his guard down, not after some of the shit Sesshoumaru had put him through in the past. When he recovered fully from his injuries, he would once again regard his half-brother as a potential enemy, despite their temporary truce. He would never seek a confrontation against Sesshoumaru without provocation, but he would obviously defend himself if one was forced upon him. If the daiyoukai was willing to keep the peace, however, then there would be peace between them. The character of their relationship was, as it had always been, Sesshoumaru’s decision.

"How are you feeling, Inuyasha?" Kagura asked, breaking his train of thought. Her tone was casual, but the hanyou sensed that she was trying to conceal the true extent to which she cared.

"Keh, I’m fine," he replied, also casually. "How’s your arm?"

"Oh, this?" she inquired, raising said appendage to the side for his inspection. The flesh had mostly healed, and the smell of burned skin had completely left her. "It’s nothing. I heal fast. You though…you suffered a lot worse. Even your clothes got fucked up."

Inuyasha grimaced, not liking the hint of remorse he could detect in her voice. She had nothing to feel guilty over; he’d made his own decision and hadn’t given her a say in the matter. She was right that his clothes were in rough shape, however. His kosode was in tatters and would need to be replaced. His fire-rat robes had some holes in them but were self-mending. While the Yomotsu-shikome’s curse had attacked his clothing indiscriminately, they’d clearly been more interested in devouring his flesh. And fortunately, they’d eaten away at his exposed skin first—the more sensitive areas of his body covered by his hakama had escaped relatively unharmed. Yet another reason to be grateful that Sesshoumaru had rescued him when he did, since the carnage would only have spread with the passage of time. There were some places on a man’s body where pain was experienced more intensely than the rest of him. He shivered, glad he could regard that special type of pain as a product of his imagination, rather than a memory.

"Seriously, Inuyasha…thank you."

"Don’t thank me," he told her. "I was trying to save both of us."

"I know, but you took on so much more risk than me. I wouldn’t have blamed you if you’d thought to save yourself first. You have a lot more to live for than I do…"

"Shut up," he snapped, her declaration proving inexplicably irritating. "You don’t need something to live for. Just live for the sake of living. ‘Cause no matter how much life sucks, there’s always a chance that someday, when you least expect it…you’ll find what you’ve been looking for the whole time."

Kagura glanced at him over her shoulder, seemingly surprised by his encouraging message. He was somewhat stunned himself, but his words had come suddenly and from the heart. Hearing her deprecate the value of her own life rubbed him the wrong way, because he had once fallen into the same trap. After all, what reason did a lonely hanyou have for waking up every day? But he had taken his own advice, living for the sake of living, not really knowing what he was searching for until he stumbled upon it one day. And even then, he’d spent months with Kikyou before realizing what he truly desired from her. His first love had taught him that what he’d really been seeking since his mother’s death were the same things any human might yearn for—companionship, and a place to call home. Since his reawakening, his desires had deepened, fully maturing as he encountered true love for the first time. He’d finally found what he’d been looking for his whole life, and had lost her due to his own foolishness. Now he was closer than ever to getting her back.

Inuyasha couldn’t promise the same thing would happen to Kagura, that she would one day find her own love. Truthfully, he didn’t really care. But he wouldn’t let her devalue her existence, not when there was still hope. She could fight for her freedom, and one day perhaps find happiness. But in the meantime, she had a very important vow to keep.

"Don’t forget your promise," he reminded her, more gently. "You said you’d keep an eye on Kagome for me."

"Yeah, yeah," she said, waving him off. Then she changed the subject, acting as though their serious discussion had never taken place. But Inuyasha liked to think that his words would stay with her. Despite long odds and a harrowing experience, both of them were returning to the living world.

Hope was still alive and well.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Here are some links about the Yomotsu-shikome:
> 
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Japanese_mythology - skip to “Izanagi in the underworld”
> 
> http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Shikome
> 
> And thanks to SplendentGoddess and knittingknots for their input on this choice of villain. I always try to make sure my depictions matched the mythology. The myth doesn’t have the Yomotsu-shikome actually leaving the underworld…but that’s what creative license is for, no?


	29. Reunions

Inuyasha snorted quietly as he and his unlikely group of companions passed through the gateway, back into the world of the living. The damn thing had remained closed despite everything he and Tetsusaiga had thrown at it, but had spread open for Sesshoumaru like a cheap whore. The arrogant bastard didn’t even have to pull his sword out.

His amusement at his own sexually-related puns notwithstanding, Inuyasha was fairly annoyed by this turn of events. He was nevertheless extremely relieved to return to this plane of existence, where the odds of encountering any deadly creatures from hell were slim. His stomach rumbled with renewed intensity, perhaps sensing that digestion of something other than air was in its future. Best of all, he was now once again in the same world as Kagome, and possessed the Shikon fragment which would hopefully prove the key to her release. How that would actually work was up to Naraku. Inuyasha wasn’t a fool; he didn’t expect the deceitful prick to make a fair exchange without some attempt at trickery. But one thing was for certain—Naraku wasn’t getting his grubby hands on this shard until Kagome was free, or Inuyasha himself was dead.

He went cross-eyed for a moment, staring down at the source of the familiar tingling sensation on his nose. He smacked himself in the face out of reflex, already knowing what, or who, he would find in his palm.

"Inuyasha-sama!" shouted his diminutive vassal, recovering quickly from his flattened state and hopping up and down. "I’m so glad you made it back safely!"

"Yeah, yeah," the hanyou replied dismissively. "What’s the big idea, Myouga-jijii?"

"The big…I’m not sure what you mean."

"Oh, really? What about telling my bastard brother about the jewel shard?" Inuyasha demanded, jerking his chin in said bastard’s direction.

"B-but I was concerned! And Sesshoumaru-sama was the only person I knew who might be able to make it through the gate!"

"I would’ve found my own way out. Who said I needed any help?"

Kagura snorted from her place in front of him on the feather, and Inuyasha glared at the back of her head. Truthfully, the hanyou wasn’t too upset with Myouga; he just wanted to see the flea sweat a bit. If the situation in the other world hadn’t been so dire, he probably would be downright pissed at his vassal’s choice to involve his pompous ass of a half-brother in matters which didn’t concern him. But the fact was that he would be dead or dying without Sesshoumaru’s intervention, and he wasn’t so cruel as to ignore Myouga’s part in his continued survival and successful return. And while it was quite satisfying to watch the flea twitch nervously in his hand, he knew he couldn’t keep up the charade for too much longer.

"I-I…you, I mean…"

"Keh. Relax, Jijii. I ain’t mad…well, not really." Myouga did relax visibly at those words, but tensed up again as Inuyasha gripped him between his thumb and forefinger, squeezing hard enough to get his message across. "Just don’t _ever_ involve _him_ in my shit again. Got it?"

"Y-yes, Inuyasha-sama."

Deciding that his vassal had been suitably chastised, Inuyasha figured that he should probably reward the little bloodsucker for saving his life. He pulled aside the collar of his robes in silent invitation, and Myouga literally dove in with an excited exclamation.

"Just don’t take too much," Inuyasha ordered, not wishing to suffer the indignity of keeling over in front of either Sesshoumaru or Kagura. Fortunately, Myouga seemed to sense the shape he was in and didn’t take as much blood as he could have. He was still fairly distended by the time he was finished, and sighed in bliss while rolling around happily in his master’s lap.

"Oi, Myouga," the hanyou stated after a moment, remembering something important. "Is Miroku okay?"

"I cannot say for sure," the flea replied solemnly. "I removed as much poison as I could, and he was still breathing when I left him. Beyond that…"

"Thanks," Inuyasha muttered, sincerely grateful. Even if Miroku hadn’t been able to pull through, Myouga had at least given him a fighting chance. And with this knowledge, the hanyou was cautiously optimistic that his friend had indeed survived his brush with death. The monk had always shown a willingness to sacrifice himself for his friends, but he also possessed a strong will to live, which must be even stronger now that Sango had accepted his proposal. Still, Inuyasha would obviously not stop worrying until he was able to greet Miroku in person, and thank him for what he’d done.

By this time, Sesshoumaru had led them out of the cave and was soaring across the sky, with Kagura following at a respectful distance. Inuyasha didn’t know where they were going, but he had an inkling about why they were going there. _He must be heading back to where he left that little girl who travels with him._ Curious now, Inuyasha wondered if he might actually get some answers to the questions which had arisen that evening at Naraku’s castle. First among them was why on earth would a cold daiyoukai like Sesshoumaru keep a young human girl at his side? It hadn’t seemed like a master-servant relationship, since she’d been so happy to see him. Rather, she had acted like a loyal ‘pet,’ for lack of a better term. _Naraku called her ‘Rin.’ She must be special to Sesshoumaru for some reason._ Perhaps his half-brother was more like their father than he cared to admit.

Inuyasha chuckled quietly to himself at that, but wisely kept the observation to himself. He would, however, make sure to surreptitiously check up on Rin while he was there. He doubted that Sesshoumaru was mistreating her in any way, and she was probably cared for well enough, but he wanted to be sure. A little girl’s life was at stake, and Inuyasha for one was not about to take such a thing lightly. He just hoped it didn’t come to a confrontation with Sesshoumaru, because that would _not_ be pretty. But again, he didn’t expect that would be necessary. He was honestly more concerned with how Rin would react to Kagura; it wasn’t so long ago that she had been kidnapped by the wind sorceress, after all. Sesshoumaru clearly bore no ill will toward Kagura for the incident, but if Rin was afraid of her, then at the very least the daiyoukai would demand that she leave. At worst, he would kill her, which would be fully justified from his point of view because of their history and the fact that she was Naraku’s incarnation.

In the end, he needn’t have worried. Rin didn’t even notice him or Kagura until she had greeted Sesshoumaru warmly. Her initial reaction was surprise and a little fear, but she glanced back and forth between them and her guardian a couple times, then relaxed. She was clearly still somewhat leery of them, especially the wind sorceress, but she wasn’t afraid because Sesshoumaru was nearby. Jaken, on the other hand, was beside himself with righteous indignation. The little toad spent a good couple minutes railing against the ‘hanyou’ and the ‘bitch,’ until finally Sesshoumaru kicked him in the head to shut him up. After that, Jaken stewed in silence by himself, refusing to acknowledge any of them. The whole thing tickled Inuyasha greatly, as he had never liked Jaken. The toad shared his master’s disdain for humans and hanyou, but possessed neither Sesshoumaru’s power nor his regal bearing. Inuyasha could at least respect his half-brother’s strength, but Jaken was like a prejudiced child running around insulting people who were bigger than him. Hell, even Kagome and Miroku had beaten the snot out of him at one time or another. Someone like that should learn to hold his tongue; if you were going to have a big mouth, you should be able to back it up.

Rin was babbling to Sesshoumaru about what she had been up to while he was gone when Inuyasha’s stomach growled loudly enough to be audible even to her human ears. She put her hands to her mouth and giggled, and Inuyasha blushed lightly despite himself.

"Inuyasha-sama is hungry," she declared, though her mirth died suddenly as her own stomach rumbled in response. "Rin is hungry too," she murmured, gazing hopefully up at her guardian. If Sesshoumaru wasn’t so stoic, Inuyasha had a feeling that he would have rolled his eyes. Without a word he turned and stalked into the nearby forest. Rin clapped her hands together excitedly and ran over to play with Jaken. Her attempts to cheer him up weren’t very effective, but did provide more amusement for Inuyasha and Kagura.

"Do you think your brother will get enough food for all of us, or just for the girl?" she pondered.

"Keh. Who the hell knows?" Inuyasha replied, lying down on the grass with his hands behind his head. As hungry as he was, he was content to wait and see if Sesshoumaru was feeling generous this evening. Because he _really_ didn’t feel like hunting right now.

Again, he needn’t have worried. Sesshoumaru brought back a medium-sized boar, though whether he had intentionally sought out a larger animal or simply caught the first creature he came across, no one could say. Either way, Inuyasha appreciated it. He did not appreciate having the carcass dumped at his feet or being told to ‘prepare it’ like some servant. But his hunger outweighed his annoyance and he bit his tongue. Just the smell of this pig was making his mouth water. Kagura was equally transfixed, but she tore herself away to begin cooking preparations. Rin already had a small fire, but the wind sorceress made it bigger and set up makeshift spits to roast the meat on. Meanwhile, Inuyasha carved up the boar, resisting the urge to shove bloody pieces in his mouth. He could eat raw meat—he had done so many times as a child—but he preferred it hot, and Rin definitely needed it properly cooked. She apparently liked boar meat but not its preparation, for she squealed in fright and hid her face against Sesshoumaru’s leg as he cut into the carcass. The great daiyoukai accepted it passively, tolerating her childish behavior without complaint. Inuyasha could only shake his head in wonder and amusement. The girl clearly wasn’t right in the head, wanting to be around his half-brother, but there was nothing wrong with the two of them traveling together. While Sesshoumaru wasn’t behaving as a loving father, he was truly acting as her guardian, the person responsible for her health and safety. And he clearly took those responsibilities seriously, whether that meant providing food for her or allowing Naraku to escape so he could rescue her from Kohaku. Honestly, Rin could do a lot worse; many children would love to have it as good as she did. _Yeah, I used to be one of them._

Inuyasha buried those thoughts, not wishing to dwell on the past. There were plenty of more pleasant things to think about, like how good this pig was going to taste when it was moderately cooked, yet still dripping with juices. The wait was excruciating, but completely worthwhile. Later, as he lay on the grass, so sated that he didn’t mind giving Myouga an evening snack, Inuyasha reflected that it had been a very good day, despite nearly losing his life to some monsters from hell. But alas, all good things must come to an end. And unfortunately, it was likely time for a partnership to dissolve.

"Oi, Kagura?"

"Hm?" she grunted from her place on the grass beside him.

"What will you do now?"

She sighed and sat up at that, as though she’d been dreading this moment. "No choice. I have to go back."

Inuyasha nodded, not surprised. "You staying the night?"

She sighed again. "I’d better not. I’m sure Naraku’s pissed at me already. Staying any longer will just make it worse." Acting on those words, she rose to her feet and Inuyasha followed suit.

"Well, take care of yourself," he said, holding out his hand in the same manner as he’d done during the battle against the Yomotsu-shikome. Kagura grinned, and this time clasped his hand firmly. Then she departed, disappearing rapidly into the night. Inuyasha watched her go, wondering if he would ever see her again. Fatigue hit him in a rush, and he settled himself against a convenient tree trunk. Rin and Jaken were already snoozing by the fire, and Sesshoumaru was mirroring his position across the clearing. Inuyasha felt his eyes drooping, but he resisted the seductive lure of slumber for a time. It was just so odd to be sitting peacefully with Sesshoumaru, let alone sleeping within sniffing distance of him. But his half-brother could have killed him at any point today, and probably still could without too much trouble, even though his body had somewhat recovered over the course of the evening. So there was no reason to stay awake, and in fact doing so was counterproductive to the healing process. Now, if he could just convince his nervous subconscious of that…

Eventually, fatigue won out and Inuyasha surrendered to exhaustion. He woke the following morning to the sound of Rin talking Jaken’s ear off about something or other. She was keeping her voice down pretty well, but his ears were more sensitive than she realized. Not that he minded being woken up, since it was well past dawn. He cooked up a few more pieces of boar for himself and Rin, then stood and stretched, testing the strength and health of his muscles. His body wasn’t fully healed, but it had recovered enough for physical exertion. Good thing, because they had a lot of ground to cover today, and no one was going to carry him.

Sesshoumaru didn’t mind traveling with Inuyasha to reunite with the hanyou’s companions, nor did he comment on his slower-than-normal pace. With Myouga directing them, they still made fairly good time, arriving at their destination late in the afternoon. As soon as he caught Miroku’s scent, Inuyasha heaved a sigh of relief. The monk still smelled somewhat ill, but he would be fine.

"Inuyasha! You’re back!" cried the young kitsune who came bounding out of the hut, having obviously caught his scent. Shippou froze as he noticed the other members of the hanyou’s odd entourage, who had landed by themselves about a dozen meters away. Inuyasha was actually glad that Sesshoumaru was keeping his distance; it would be more comfortable for everyone that way.

"It’s fine," he told Shippou, who was understandably nervous. "I’ll explain later."

Miroku was already sitting up as Inuyasha ducked inside the hut, watching Sango prepare the evening meal at the fire pit.

"Well, well," the monk observed with a grin. "Back from the next world, I see."

"Keh, and I see that you ain’t dropped dead yet," the hanyou answered with a grin of his own.

"No, not yet. My dear Sango has been taking _excellent_ care of me," he replied sagely, to which the taijiya ducked her head in embarrassment. Was it Inuyasha’s imagination, or did the monk seem ridiculously pleased with himself for some reason? A subtle sniff in his direction revealed the reason—he smelled significantly more like Sango than usual. They clearly hadn’t really _done_ anything, but the scent did speak of an unprecedented level of physical intimacy. _At least that explains why the bouzu is so happy._

"So, how did it go?" Miroku asked.

"Dunno. You tell me," Inuyasha said smugly, pulling the Shikon fragment from his robes and holding it up to the light. A miniature celebration erupted inside the hut at the news, tempered only by the fact that their mission was not yet completed. But to be one huge step closer to winning their lost friend back was cause for real optimism.

"That is wonderful, Inuyasha," Miroku declared. "I do, however, have one question. Am I imagining things…or do I sense your brother’s aura outside?"

An explanation was clearly in order, and Inuyasha was happy to provide it. He left out some of the gorier details, and didn’t reveal just how close he’d come to a horrible death. Instead, he merely indicated that Sesshoumaru had ‘helped’ him dispatch the Yomotsu-shikome. He couldn’t tell if his friends bought that, but they certainly agreed with his decision to offer the daiyoukai exclusive ‘rights’ to Naraku rather than fighting with him over the jewel shard. What they couldn’t figure out was why Sesshoumaru had agreed to the proposal in the first place.

"He probably figured that we could take care of the ‘small fry’ for him," Sango theorized. "Kagura…and Kohaku."

"Which works out perfectly for us," Miroku interjected, placing a comforting hand on his fiancé’s shoulder. "We’ll free Kohaku, Sango. I promise."

"Keh, but Naraku won’t fight all of us at once."

"Indeed. I am certain he will try to trick us. We must be ready."

Everyone nodded in agreement. The ball was in Naraku’s court now, since none of them had any way to locate the dark hanyou. They would just have to defeat whatever plot he set upon them.

After dinner, Inuyasha pulled Miroku aside and formally thanked him for what he’d done for Kagome. The monk brushed him off, stating with no hint of lechery that Kagome was special to him as well. He also took the opportunity to express his gratitude to Inuyasha’s vassal, who shrewdly hinted that he was hungry again. When Miroku bared his collarbone, however, the flea wondered aloud whether the monk or a ‘beautiful lady’ would taste better. Fortunately, said lady was willing if not overly excited about the prospect, though Myouga was put on notice by her fiancé that there would be consequences if he gorged himself. The flea still ate his fill, and went to sleep that evening with the thought that he should play the hero more often. So long as he didn’t put his life in serious danger, of course.

The group decided to head out the following morning, though they had no destination in mind. Miroku felt well enough to walk a fair distance—under Sango’s watchful eye, that is. The taijiya would make certain that her fiancé didn’t overdo it; if she demanded a halt so he could rest, the group would stop. Even Sesshoumaru would be wise not to question her on that. Then again, as far as the Inu-gang was concerned, the daiyoukai was free to leave any time he wanted, provided that he wasn’t still intent on taking the jewel shard with him. In the morning they would discuss with him any possible leads on Naraku, but that would likely be the extent of their interactions. They were reluctant allies, nothing more.

Every member of the Inu-gang did, however, hope that Sesshoumaru got exactly what he wanted. A one-on-one confrontation against Naraku, to the death. And while he was satisfying the demands of his stubborn pride, they would take care of what was truly important.

* * *

Kagura grumbled under her breath, pausing briefly to admire the pre-dawn light shining over the horizon. She’d spent all night searching for her master, and was tired of it. The problem was that she didn’t know where to look; Naraku’s previous lair had been abandoned, which wasn’t all that surprising given recent events. She was glad she hadn’t been foolish enough to let Sesshoumaru or Inuyasha follow her, because Naraku had definitely covered himself against that possibility.

A familiar buzzing alerted her to the approaching saimyoushou, and Kagura sighed in relief even as her stomach twisted with nervousness. She was glad her search was over, but dreaded Naraku’s wrath. Hopefully he had cooled off from his defeat against Inuyasha, and was willing to listen to reason. Because this time she really hadn’t done anything to betray him. Well, not _much_ , anyway.

She followed the saimyoushou for at least a half dozen kilometers, as they flew purposefully to the northeast. Finally, they descended and hovered around a small wooden building nestled between two high peaks. The evil aura surrounding the place left no doubt as to its principal occupant. Kagura gulped, but firmed her countenance and drifted down to meet her fate.

"Kagura," Naraku greeted in a sickly sweet tone as she entered his chambers. "Did you have a nice time with Inuyasha?"

"I didn’t have much choice," the wind sorceress replied evenly, trying to keep her temper in check. "You left me in that place with no way out."

"That did not give you an excuse to dine with my enemies last night."

"I was _hungry!_ " she snarled. "There’s no food or water in that entire fucking world, you know! And I didn’t tell them anything. Even if I _wanted_ to, I don’t know anything about your plans."

"Yes, I am aware," Naraku answered icily. "It is the sole reason you still breathe." Kagura didn’t respond to that, having already known it to be the case. There was nothing else to say, really; Naraku was going to kill her, or he wasn’t.

"I have a task for you, Kagura," he declared. She listened as he explained her part of his latest plan, frowning in confusion which was in no way forced. But her facial expression was also crafted to conceal her displeasure with the task Naraku had assigned to her. _Shit…and just when I thought I might be getting in good with him…_

"This is unlike you, Naraku," she observed, her tone sincere rather than mocking. "Normally your plans are much more…complex."

"Sometimes the simplest strategies are the best," he replied, which only caused Kagura’s anxiety to increase. Since when had Naraku espoused that philosophy? Something else was going on here. Seeing her unease, he adopted a smile which was probably supposed to be reassuring, but actually sent shivers down her spine.

"Do not concern yourself with the rest of my plan, Kagura. Just do your part. Then my enemies will be destroyed, and the Shikon no Tama will be made whole once more."

"And…when the jewel is completed…what then?"

Naraku’s grin widened, and Kagura immediately regretted her inquiry. She knew damn well what would happen to her if Naraku achieved his imagined victory, but like a fool she felt driven to pose the question anyway. His venomous smile told her all she needed to know, but he also spoke with words which seemingly tightened the grip of his fingers around her captive heart.

"Why, then you shall have your well-deserved reward."

Naraku dismissed her then, and she left him to his plotting. She was grateful for the opportunity to do some plotting of her own. She couldn’t let Naraku win; if there had been any doubt that he would kill her once his enemies were dead, he had dispelled it with his last comment. Her ‘well-deserved reward’ was death; of that she was sure. So when the time came for her to act on her master’s orders, she had to find a way to turn the tables on him. Because Naraku’s plan would completely upset the strategy which Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha had agreed to. And if somebody didn’t do something to alter the outcome…all would be lost.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – This was a short chapter, I know, but I needed a break from all of the action sequences. You know the lull won’t last for long…


	30. The Abandoned Castle

Shippou chuckled evilly to himself as he eyed his prey. She was breathing heavily while hiding behind a large tree, peering around the trunk in an attempt to spot him. From his perch in a branch above and behind her, the young kitsune observed her fruitless searching, determined that this time he would finally get her. This time he wouldn’t screw it up.

It was late morning on the second full day in which his group and Sesshoumaru’s had traveled together. Yesterday, he’d discovered that Rin was fun to play with. Usually all she had for companionship were Jaken and A-Un, neither of whom made good playmates. Shippou was in a similar situation himself, so he leapt at the chance to interact with another kid, especially a cute young girl. Her guardian didn’t seem to mind, as long as she was happy. His friends had teased him about it after Rin had returned to Sesshoumaru’s separate camp to sleep, but aside from some mild embarrassment, he didn’t really mind. He wasn’t a pervert like Miroku or a bumbling idiot like Inuyasha; he could make a girl like him just by being himself. Rin had indeed taken a liking to him, but didn’t seem to have anything on her mind other than enjoying their playtime. That was fine; both of them really were too young for romance. Besides, he didn’t wish to cross her guardian, who still scared the daylights out of him.

Not that this would stop him from making her scream for mercy. He knew he didn’t have much time left; this would probably be his final attempt. The others would be finished eating lunch soon, and Sango would be satisfied that Miroku had rested enough. The monk had started insisting that he was fine, but hadn’t pushed his luck with his concerned fiancé. Just because he was recovering from Naraku’s miasma did not mean that she wouldn’t give him a lump on the head for being stubborn. So for Shippou it was now or never. Playtime was officially over.

He crept along the branch, taking care to make as little noise as possible. Rin continued to peer around at ground level, never realizing that her demise would come from above. Closer and closer he crept, until finally he was almost in position to pounce. Then she began to drift away, probably seeking a new hiding place while unknowingly thwarting his attempt. Refusing to accept failure, Shippou ran along the branch on all fours and leapt before she had a chance to react to the rustling of the leaves above her head.

Or so he thought. In reality, his target ducked out of the way at the last moment and he ended up kissing dirt at painful velocity. What hurt more than his humiliating face-plant, however, was the bitter sting of failure. He knew what had happened—he’d been too impatient. Instead of following her quietly and creating another opportunity for a surprise attack, he’d revealed his presence too soon and underestimated her reflexes. And now he was going to pay for it. He wasn’t surprised when her body settled on top of him, pinning him to the ground.

"Say ‘uncle!’" she demanded teasingly.

"Never!" Shippou answered, struggling futilely. He knew what was going to happen next, but his wounded pride kept him from surrendering so easily. His will to resist buckled as she began tickling his feet.

"Ah! St-ah! S-stop!" he cried in between involuntary giggles.

"Say ‘uncle,’" she replied in a sing-song voice. When he only continued to struggle, she attacked his ultimate weak spot. A few minutes ago she’d discovered that his tail was extremely ticklish if touched just the right way. He barely lasted another two seconds.

"U-uncle," he whispered, losing his ability to breathe.

"What’s that? I can’t hear you."

"Uncle!"

Finally the torture ceased, and his tormenter rolled off of him to lie in the grass, laughing merrily. By the time Shippou was able to pick himself gingerly off the ground, still shuddering, he found her sitting up and grinning at him victoriously. His chin jutting out into a full-blow pout, he crossed his arms over his chest and turned his back on her.

"Aw, don’t be mad, Shippou-chan," she told him as her arms suddenly wrapped around him and hugged him from behind. Her scent was so pleasant, and her body so warm…why was he mad at her again? Somehow it didn’t really feel like losing anymore.

"I’ll get you next time," he promised playfully, his pride still not fully recovered. He was nevertheless disappointed when her arms left him and she dropped him on his backside.

"Let’s go again! Start counting!"

"Wait, Rin!"

"What is it?"

"Let’s head back to camp. The others will want to leave soon."

"Whatsa matter, Shippou-chan? Scared?"

The kitsune bristled at that. "No, I’m not scared!"

"Really?" she teased. "You seem pretty scared to me."

Shippou’s eyes narrowed as emotion won out over reason. "Start running," he growled menacingly. _The others also told you not to go too far,_ a little voice whispered in his head as Rin ran giggling deeper into the forest. But he ignored it, unwilling to back down from a challenge like that, especially from a girl he liked. He would get her this time even if it killed him!

He only counted to fifteen instead of thirty like he was supposed to, but it was a necessary alteration to the rules. He had to make this quick and get Rin back to camp so Sesshoumaru didn’t skin him alive. Smiling grimly, he scurried after his prey, following her scent trail. The smell of fresh water reached his nose moments before he burst into the clear to a sight which had his heart lodging in his throat. It was a small river, perhaps only a dozen meters wide. A tree had fallen across the span, acting as a natural bridge. A bridge which his companion was about halfway through with crossing, balancing carefully with her arms stretched out to either side.

"Rin, come back!" he called out of reflex, which proved to be a terrible mistake. She turned quickly to locate him—too quickly. For the swiftness of the turn shook her fragile balance, and she swirled her arms in panic for a moment before toppling backwards into the rushing water. Shippou held his breath, seconds seeming to stretch for hours until she finally surfaced, coughing and sputtering several meters downstream from where she fell.

"Rin!" he cried, charging after her along the bank.

"Ship—" she tried to respond, but her panicked shout was choked off as her head went under again. She surfaced quickly this time, but it was clear that staying afloat was going to be a struggle. The river wasn’t that wide or deep, but she didn’t possess the muscle mass to fight the current. All she could do was try to keep her head above water, though how long she could manage that was a terrifying question.

Fortunately, this part of the river was not rapids, so there were no sharp rocks to tear her tiny human body to pieces. And the flow was not so swift that Shippou couldn’t match it on the run. Thinking quickly, he darted past her and grabbed a large stick, dragging it down the bank and flinging the end into the water with some strength he didn’t know he possessed.

"Rin, grab this!" he yelled, holding onto the other end for all he was worth and digging his heels into the sand. She lunged and managed to grab the wood, and for a fleeting moment he held her in place, preventing her from being swept further downriver. Then his attempted rescue went horribly wrong.

Before he knew what was happening, Shippou found himself immersed in cold water. His feet had obviously lost their purchase and he’d been yanked into the river. Struggling to the surface, he located the stick nearby and swam to it, using it as a flotation device. Rin was panicking now, thrashing in the water, her choked cries no longer identifiable as words. Shippou kicked mightily with his feet, grim determination flooding his being. He didn’t know if the stick would fully support her weight, but its natural buoyancy would certainly help. If necessary, he would give it to her and take his chances with the current. She was not dying today.

Salvation came in the form of a shadow passing overhead. For a moment, Shippou thought it was Sesshoumaru coming to save Rin, having tracked them down when they were long in returning. He rejoiced at this turn of events, despite the consequences which would undoubtedly be visited upon him. But when the actual identify of the person hovering overhead became clear, his spirits sank. Kagura reached down and plucked Rin from the water without even getting her kimono wet, then deposited the coughing girl onto the back of her feather and soared off into the sky. In the blink of an eye, she was gone.

"Rin!" Shippou cried, a different kind of fear now fueling his furious kicking. He managed to paddle to the bank, crawling onto the sand with exhausted arms and legs. He flopped onto his stomach, allowing himself a moment to catch his breath before beginning the long sprint back to camp to tell the others what had happened. Then the damp ground was no longer pressed against his cheek; he was hoisted aloft by the strong hand gripping his tail. And when he opened his eyes, he found himself nose-to-nose with none other than Sesshoumaru himself.

"Where is she?" he demanded in a tone which had the kit’s life flashing before his eyes. He gulped, but though he feared that they would be his last words, he told Sesshoumaru the truth. His foolishness had allowed Rin to be kidnapped by the enemy, but he would not fail her now.

"Kagura took her…that way," he confessed, pointing a shaking hand in the direction the wind sorceress had fled. The daiyoukai stared at him for a moment, and Shippou was sure that quietly irate visage was going to be the last thing he ever saw. Then he was falling, and Sesshoumaru was gone. He landed on his stomach in the mud, too shocked to put his feet under him. He simply lay there, every rapid beat of his heart within his chest an unfathomable blessing. It wasn’t long, however, before the sound of hurried footfalls reached his ears, and someone else picked him up by the tail. This time it was Inuyasha, his expression one of concern rather than anger.

"Shippou, what the hell happened?"

The kit met the worried gazes of each of his friends in turn, Miroku and Sango having ridden here on Kirara. Finally when his gaze panned back around to Inuyasha’s golden orbs, his vision blurred and he squeezed his eyes shut against the tears forming there.

"Rin," he sobbed, pointing once again in the direction she had been taken. "Kagura…"

"Kagura kidnapped her? Shit!"

"We’ll never catch them," Sango lamented, and Shippou knew she was right. With Inuyasha unable to fly and Kirara carrying two adult humans, none of them stood a chance of keeping up with Kagura or Sesshoumaru, let alone closing the distance.

"We should follow them anyway," Inuyasha declared. "Are you up for it, Kirara?"

The fire-cat roared in response, and the hanyou stuffed Shippou into his robes before taking off. He leapt over the river in a single bound, then charged through the forest, skillfully avoiding the trees as though they weren’t even there. He kept Kirara within sight, following her as she flew above the canopy. Safely ensconced within the outer layer of Inuyasha’s robes, Shippou curled into a ball and buried his face in the hanyou’s kosode. There the fragile damn on his tears broke, and he wept his despair into a friend’s chest. Soon he felt a large hand grab his head, and feared that Inuyasha was about to yell at him to be a man and quit balling like a baby. But instead the hanyou only ruffled his hair, gently despite his current level of physical exertion.

"It’s okay, Shippou," he said, his voice gruff only due to the strain his lungs were under. "If Naraku wanted to kidnap her, he would’ve found a way sooner or later. Sesshoumaru will save her."

Shippou only cried harder, accepting his friend’s comfort as their pursuit of his lost companion continued. Eventually his tears wound down to sniffles, and he poked his head out of Inuyasha’s haori, watching blankly as the world flew by. After a couple more hours of this, Sango called a halt. Kirara was exhausted, and they had lost sight of Sesshoumaru long ago. There was no scent left to follow; they were really just traveling in a general direction, which might not even be the right one anymore. Given these circumstances, the group agreed that haste was not worth the tremendous amount of energy it took from Kirara and Inuyasha. They still continued along their current heading, at a walking pace. Kirara, relieved of her burden, could be heard purring in Sango’s arms as her mistress petted her. Shippou received no such treatment from Inuyasha, but the hanyou’s cool demeanor was a comfort in and of itself. His friends’ gazes weren’t accusing when they looked at him, nor did they avoid eye contact when he dared to glance in their direction. He had made a mistake, a stupid one, but none of them thought that he deserved to be condemned for it. And he sensed that if Sesshoumaru disagreed with that assessment, his friends would protect him. This revelation finally began to lift the downtrodden kit out of his depression. He still remained worried and rather miserable, though he appreciated their understanding. As he appreciated the fact that Inuyasha never made him leave the warmth and comfort of his robes.

The remainder of the afternoon passed uneventfully. Shippou tried to be optimistic, hoping that Sesshoumaru had caught Kagura by now and rescued Rin. But the more he thought about it, the less sense Kagura’s actions made. So she had separated them from Sesshoumaru—so what? There had to be something else going on here. More than likely, Rin’s abduction was merely the first layer of Naraku’s plot. The only question was the identity of the dark hanyou’s true target. Shippou assumed it was Sesshoumaru, and he figured his friends all thought the same. It was not until the sun dipped behind the clouds hovering just over the western horizon that the first evidence against this theory appeared. Inuyasha suddenly stopped dead in his tracks and inhaled deeply, turning slightly to the right and sniffing furiously as his feet guided him closer to the faint scent he was trying to verify. Shippou glanced at Kirara and found the fire-cat just as bewildered as he. But Inuyasha finally turned to regard them, smiling grimly.

"It’s Naraku’s scent," he announced, his otherwise excited tone darkened with the gravity of the situation. "The coward has finally revealed himself." No one said another word, for none were needed. All knew they were walking into a trap, but they didn’t care. There was no hesitation; one way or another, it was time to end this.

An impressive display of speed took them within minutes to the place from which Naraku’s scent obviously emanated. It was a huge castle, one which in its heyday had probably served as home to a truly powerful daimyo as well as thousands of servants and soldiers. But those glory days had long since passed; the castle was now nothing more than a graveyard. Bones littered the grounds, picked apart and scattered by hungry scavengers. The castle itself was crumbling around them, appearing to have suffered under the elements for decades without a single human hand to make repairs. It was a place of death. Considering all of the evil Naraku had wrought upon the world, Inuyasha could not think of a more fitting location for the final battle against him.

"W-where is he?" Shippou whispered, hopping down from Inuyasha’s robes and scurrying over to stand next to Kirara. The hanyou’s fighting style meant that nestled against his chest was far from the safest place on the battlefield; all of the wounds he’d received there over the past year could attest to that.

"Show yourself, Naraku!" Inuyasha demanded, but for several long moments no reply came.

"Kukuku," Naraku’s voice boomed at last, bouncing off of the dilapidated buildings to produce a haunting echo. Inuyasha’s ears swiveled in all directions, but he couldn’t pinpoint the source of the sound.

"Welcome to my castle, Inuyasha," Naraku greeted at last, his tone dripping with sadistic pleasure. "I believe I have something you want…and you have something which belongs to me. Did you by chance bring the shard with you?"

"Yeah, I brought it. It’s right here," Inuyasha answered, patting the right side of his torso. It was a lie; the shard was actually with Miroku since the monk was better able to keep it pure while in the presence of corruptive influences. He didn’t want Miroku to become a target, so he hoped his confident reply had fooled Naraku.

"Good. Drop it and throw down your weapons, and I will grant you swift deaths. Otherwise, you will suffer until your miserable lives finally expire."

"Give Kagome back, and you can have the damn shard," Inuyasha retorted, already resigned to what Naraku’s answer would be. He could sense no sign that Kagome was or had ever been here. As he’d feared, Naraku was not in the mood for negotiation. In a way, that was a good thing, since the dark hanyou would certainly be easier to defeat without the completed Shikon no Tama in his possession. The corrupted portion of the jewel was nearly whole already, but once that final shard was added, Inuyasha had a feeling that its power would increase exponentially.

"Kukuku, was that your plan? You are a fool to the very end, Inuyasha. Kagome will not be coming. She has been hidden far away from here. There will be no exchange. You lot will all die here in agony and despair, and I will take what is mine. Then, once I have completed the Shikon no Tama, I will release Kagome from my minion’s spell. I will show her your decaying corpses, and then I will kill her, slowly…and _deliciously_."

"Bastard," Inuyasha snarled, tightening his grip on Tetsusaiga’s hilt. This was normally the point when he would charge in and begin the battle just to shut the enemy up, but Naraku still hadn’t revealed himself.

"Come out and face me, you coward!"

"Kukuku, I think not. Though I will provide you with some company."

Youki suddenly exploded all around them, countless individual signatures all melding into an overwhelming presence. Huge figures rose up on all sides, surrounding them in a writhing circle of Naraku’s puppets. But these puppets were unlike those the Inu-gang had faced before; they appeared less like artificial creations and more like real youkai, visceral and deadly. Then the light dimmed noticeably, and Inuyasha and his friends gazed upwards to find an undulating mass of thousands of lesser youkai above them. Boxed in on all sides by powerful tentacles and sharp teeth, our heroes were temporarily reduced to stunned silence. Naraku had literally raised an army to destroy the five of them; it was a display of strength the likes of which they had never seen before.

"Witness the true extent of my power, Inuyasha!"

The youkai began to move in, and Inuyasha slowly pulled Tetsusaiga from its sheath. He could smell Shippou’s fear, and even Miroku and Sango seemed nervous. But Inuyasha was oddly calm. This is what they had strived for, was it not? And they had come too far to be done in by a bunch of small fry.

"Oi, stay close," he told them. "Whatever you do, don’t get separated." He met each of their gazes in turn, reaffirming resolve, until finally he came to Miroku. "And bouzu, you keep your damn kazaana closed. I’m sure Naraku has saimyoushou mixed in with the youkai."

The monk nodded, but Inuyasha could tell that he didn’t really mean it. If things became desperate enough, Miroku would open his kazaana, insects or no. Sango looked like she wanted to say something, but there simply wasn’t time. The enemy army was closing in. Inuyasha opened the battle with a Kaze no Kizu which decimated two of the puppets, tearing them to ribbons. That was the first sign that this plot of Naraku’s ran deeper than merely overwhelming them with numbers. For as the puppets disintegrated, they rained down miasma, thick globs which stuck to everything they touched and a fine mist which hung in the air, dark and foreboding.

"Shit. Sango!" Inuyasha cried, glancing over his shoulder to find the taijiya already fastening her mask over the lower part of her face. With that protection in place, she would be resistant to airborne poison, as would Miroku due to his spiritual power. Shippou and Kirara were youkai, and wouldn’t succumb easily either. And Inuyasha knew he was tough enough to handle it. But while they could manage a good countermeasure, it wasn’t perfect. Miroku’s power could only do so much, and Sango’s mask didn’t protect her eyes. Even the two full-youkai weren’t so strong as to be completely immune to the toxin. How much miasma in the air would it take to kill them? And who would succumb first?

Naraku seemed fully intent on finding out, and the Inu-gang was forced to oblige. They didn’t have much choice in the matter; the puppets were attacking with intent to kill, and it was either destroy them or die. Inuyasha tried to handle the bulk of that work, leaving the lesser youkai to his friends. His tough hide and fire-rat would protect him if he got covered in the liquefied miasma, and the airborne haze was obviously thicker where the creatures died. But despite his efforts, a heavy fog soon hovered over the entire battlefield, reducing visibility and making it difficult to breathe. Still, they fought on. Sango eliminated scores of youkai with great sweeps of hiraikotsu, while Miroku protected her blind side with his sutras and staff. Kirara soared above them, tearing youkai apart with her fangs and claws. Within minutes, the number of enemies surrounding them was halved.

Then the suffocating miasma began to take its toll. Miroku stumbled, and only Shippou’s timely intervention saved his life; the kit deployed his illusory spinning top to hold the marauding youkai at bay long enough for the monk to scramble to his feet again. Soon after, one of the youkai managed to sink its teeth into Kirara’s hindquarters. She shook it off and dispatched it, but afterwards her mobility was significantly reduced and the close calls became more and more frequent. A phenomenon experienced by her mistress as well, as Sango’s reflexes dulled. Eventually she was swinging hiraikotsu not as a trained killer, but like a blind man hacking at phantoms. Finally she swung too wildly, losing her balance and collapsing to the ground. She tried to rise but was unable to go any further than a shaky sitting position. Miroku, seeing her plight, tried to run to her and tripped over his own feet, going down in a heap. He too was unable to muster the strength to rise. Kirara thumped down to the earth between them, weakened and wounded, growling a vicious warning to whomever might think to attack her family. Shippou crouched underneath her, prepared to unleash every trick he knew. He might not be able to kill a youkai, but he could distract them and buy time. But both the fire-cat and kitsune knew that nothing they could do would hold off the enemy for long. Hundreds of lesser youkai remained, circling hungrily. Soon they would close in for the kill.

"Inuyasha!" Shippou hollered at the top of his lungs.

Some distance away, Inuyasha heard his friend’s plaintive cry. He had purposely drawn the attention of the puppets and lured them away from his companions. This was for their own protection, as the concentration of miasma in this area would likely kill any of them outright. It was even affecting him significantly, despite the strong blood coursing through his veins, but so far he’d been able to escape serious injury while taking out a little more than half of the puppets. But in the heat of battle, he’d drifted further away from his friends than he’d intended. And now they might pay for his mistake with their lives.

Cursing, Inuyasha launched a carefully aimed Kaze no Kizu, which through months of practice did exactly what he wanted it to do. Namely, take out a portion of the youkai circling his friends while the force of the attack drove some of the noxious haze away from them. Immediately Miroku and Sango began gasping for breath, greedily inhaling the fresher air. But the damage had already been done; the humans would need some time to recover from the poison already in their systems. Now Inuyasha had to get over there to buy them that time.

He lurched into a rather sluggish sprint, which was the best he could manage, but a puppet moved into position to block his path. They had taken advantage of his momentary distraction to move in close, where their tentacles and poisonous innards would be more effective. Seeing no other alternative, Inuyasha decided to slice through the creature before him and continue on his way. It went well at first, until miasma from the decimated puppet fell upon him, drenching him to the skin. He staggered, trying vainly to wipe the stuff away from his face. Through blurred vision, he saw another puppet looming over him, and destroyed it with a Kaze no Kizu, only to be further bathed in miasma. He dropped to his hands and knees, gritting his teeth against the pain as his eyes and lungs burned. He sensed another enemy presence above him, but his attempt to rise to his feet resulted in his foot slipping out from underneath him, leading to a graceless fall flat onto his face. And that was it. The internal clock in his head told the wretched truth—he was about to be killed. Tentacles would run him through before he had time to evade them. This was the end. He closed his eyes, his final thoughts turning to the woman he loved. _I’m sorry, Kagome._

Nothing happened. After several seconds of this, Inuyasha dared to open his eyes and glance behind him. Sure enough, a puppet was looming over him, but it wasn’t doing anything. A few others nearby were likewise stationary. He looked over to his friends and found that the youkai swarm had backed off as well, circling above them at a fair distance but making no aggressive moves. Miroku and Sango were kneeling now, supported by Kirara, with Shippou sitting on the fire-cat’s back appearing nauseous but otherwise fine. Just as Inuyasha was wondering what the hell was going on, the sound of footsteps reached his ears. It was Naraku himself, striding across the grounds while appearing ridiculously pleased with himself. And suddenly Inuyasha understood why the youkai and puppets had momentarily spared them—their master was coming to gloat. _Heh, I should have known. He’s always been that kind of bastard. But he should have beaten me down a little more before showing his face!_

This time when Inuyasha pushed up with his arms and planted his feet underneath him, the muscles in his legs held, if not shakily. He raised Tetsusaiga, transforming it into its diamond spear form. It wouldn’t be a full-strength strike, but it would still tear through Naraku’s barrier and damage his body. And once he finished dealing with the remaining underlings, he would figure out a way to destroy the dark hanyou himself.

Naraku, however, only smirked when he saw Inuyasha’s stance and sword. He stopped a few dozen meters away and snapped his fingers. From behind him emerged a figure which caused dread to settle in Inuyasha’s stomach. It was Kohaku, who walked around and stood directly in front of Naraku, so close that the dark hanyou even placed a taunting hand on the boy’s shoulder. Inuyasha initially feared that Kohaku would succumb to the miasma, but that concern proved unfounded. The area inside Naraku’s barrier was the only place on the battlefield untouched by the toxic haze. Kohaku was alive and well, just as his master intended.

"Koha—" Sango called, unable to finish his name before descending into a coughing fit. Miroku rubbed her back, glaring daggers at the bastard who dared to use his soon-to-be brother-in-law as a human shield. Kohaku did not react to any of this, merely staring straight ahead with his usual lifeless eyes.

"Go ahead, Inuyasha," Naraku taunted. "Unleash the Kongousouha." Inuyasha swore under his breath, but reversed Tetsusaiga’s transformation. Naraku’s grin widened.

"You are weak, Inuyasha. That is why you will die. The things this boy has done…he would be better off dead. And yet his presence is enough to still your sword. Pathe—" Naraku abruptly cut himself off, turning his amused gaze on Miroku, who had already grasped the beads wrapped around his right wrist. "And you, houshi, you’re thinking that you’ll release the kazaana, and suck up all of my miasma and minions. You’ll sacrifice yourself so that Inuyasha can save Kohaku and Kagome. Well, I can’t allow that, can I? I gave your grandfather that kazaana, and I can take it away!"

Miroku staggered, closing his right hand into a fist and clutching it to his chest. When the pain subsided, he removed the covering with shaking fingers and gazed in astonishment at his unbroken palm. He had always imagined that this sight would fill him with joy, but now it brought only despair.

"How does it feel to be nothing more than a mere human again?" Naraku sneered. "Do you cretins finally understand how hopeless it is to resist me? This castle will be your grave, as it was a grave for thousands of others before you."

"Bastard," Inuyasha snarled, at a loss for what else to do or say. Naraku ignored him.

"It is no coincidence that I chose to bring you to this castle. Fifty years ago, after I killed Kikyou—for the _first_ time—I wandered aimlessly, until my journey carried me here. Onigumo’s desires were still strong within me, and he wanted power. So I killed the daimyo along with his entire personal guard. After that, the people recognized me as their new lord, and I ruled this castle as a Kami. I could have anything I wanted—wealth, women, sport. Men fought to the death for my amusement, and children went to sleep at night wondering if my servants would come to take them away. The young ones always screamed the loudest… It was a glorious time, but it was not to last. Soon enough, the people grew tired of being ruled by a lord who was superior to them in every way, and rose up against me. So I slaughtered them. Every last man, woman, and child perished by my hand, or the fangs of my youkai. I left this castle exactly as it was on that wonderful day, a monument to the weakness of humanity.

"So you see, Inuyasha, it is only fitting that you and your friends should die here. This is the place where Onigumo truly became Naraku. And it is here where Naraku, the completed Shikon no Tama in hand, will transcend every power in this world, and become a Kami in his own right."

"Tch, you’re right, it is only fitting," Inuyasha replied. "That you should die here, in the same place where you killed all those people!"

"Kukuku, still brimming with false confidence, I see. Very well, then, let’s see if we can’t put the stubborn hanyou in his proper place once more. On your knees!"

Naraku raised his hand, and Inuyasha sensed that he was about to order his puppets to resume their attacks. Then he froze, turning his surprised visage to the west. Inuyasha followed his gaze, noticing what Naraku had obviously sensed—a figure emerging from the gloom. Even before he could clearly make out the newcomer, Inuyasha knew who it was. That exceedingly arrogant gait could be pulled off by no one else.

"S-Sesshoumaru!"

* * *

Kagura swore under her breath. This was not good. She crouched in the shadows of a large building well outside the combat zone, observing as Naraku verbally tormented his intended victims. Soon her master would tire of the game, and those torments would become physical. Inuyasha and his friends were living on borrowed time.

"W-we have to d-do something," Rin stuttered behind her, clutching the sleeve of her kimono for comfort. She’d managed to convince the girl that she meant her no harm, and Rin certainly trusted her more than she did the rogue youkai flying around. So far they had avoided discovery, but who knew how long that would last?

One thing was for certain—Rin was right. She _did_ need to do something. She couldn’t just sit here and watch while Inuyasha and his friends were slaughtered. But what could she do? As soon as Naraku saw her, he would materialize her heart and crush it in his hand. At best, she could provide a momentary distraction to buy her erstwhile ally more time to recover and come up with a viable strategy. More than likely, that would fail and she’d get herself killed for nothing. But would that really be for nothing, if she acted on her desire to help Inuyasha however she could? At least she would go out in such a way that the survivors of this battle would remember her. And was that not true freedom?

"Sesshoumaru-sama!"

Rin’s joyous cry broke Kagura from her musings. Before she knew it, the girl had raced past her and out into the open, heedless of the hundreds of ravenous youkai hovering between her and her guardian.

"Shit!" Kagura cursed, deploying her fan and taking to the air. As she flew in pursuit of Rin, she located Sesshoumaru’s regal form on the far side of the castle. He had emerged from the mist only moments ago, and was preparing to engage Naraku one-on-one. Kagura growled in irritation. She had hoped to see Sesshoumaru again, but not like this. _What the hell is he doing?!_

It appeared that his foolishness was going to get his ward killed. Youkai appeared in Kagura’s path, too numerous to slice through easily. As the wind sorceress watched in horror, a serpentine youkai swooped down on Rin and clamped its jaws around her. The girl screamed once, then inhaled and continued screaming as the youkai carried her toward its master. Kagura had mixed feelings about this—on the one hand, Rin was obviously still alive, but on the other, a quick and relatively painless death might be better than what Naraku would do to her. Though perhaps both could be avoided. Sesshoumaru heard his ward’s cries and immediately charged forward, intent on intercepting the youkai before it could reach the safety of its master’s barrier.

"Another step and she dies!" Naraku declared, as his youkai punctuated that statement by tightening its jaws and choking off Rin’s scream. Sesshoumaru stopped dead in his tracks, clenching his fist as he was forced to stand idly by while his ward became Naraku’s prisoner.

"Release her," the daiyoukai demanded, his eyes wide with fury as his youki swirled wildly around him. No trace of his normally stoic façade remained.

"Kukuku, calm yourself, Sesshoumaru. Rin will be perfectly safe inside my barrier. That is, until Inuyasha decides that her life is no longer worth saving."

Naraku put his hand on Rin’s head, and Inuyasha could tell that his half-brother almost lost it. The girl shook uncontrollably, obviously in shock, as she gazed at Sesshoumaru with pleading, frightened eyes. Small red spots dotted her kimono, though the wounds appeared to be superficial. Of far greater concern was the monster holding her captive, and the powerful barrier keeping her within his clutches.

"He won’t hurt her, Sesshoumaru," Inuyasha told his half-brother, seeking to prevent him from completely losing his composure. "Tetsusaiga can break his barrier again. He needs Rin to act as a shield against me."

"Well, technically, I only need one of my two captives to accomplish that," Naraku observed casually, increasing Sesshoumaru’s ire as he pretended to ponder a difficult decision. "But two shields are better than one, are they not?" Then the dark hanyou sighed dramatically.

"This is not turning out how I planned. I had hoped to engage you separately, Sesshoumaru, as is befitting your station," he stated mockingly. "But I knew there was a chance that you would show up at an inopportune time. Just as I knew that my incarnation would betray me." With that, he turned his gaze on Kagura, who had flown fairly close now that the cat was out of the bag.

"Well, Kagura, I believe I promised you a reward." Naraku smirked and held out his hand. In it appeared a beating heart. Kagura watched, taking in every pulse, wondering which would be her last. She held her breath as Naraku picked up the organ with one of his tentacles, extending it tauntingly towards her, even going so far as to bring it outside the barrier.

"Go on, Kagura. Take it," he sneered. The wind sorceress reached out her hand reflexively from her position several dozen meters away, but did not dare to move any closer, for doing so would only hasten her death. Unfortunately, at this point it didn’t matter what she did.

Naraku’s tentacle squeezed, and life became pain.


	31. Turning the Tables

"Um, Kagura-sama? Where are we going?"

The wind sorceress rolled her eyes. It was the third time Rin had asked that question. She had ignored the first two, but the girl was annoyingly persistent. _I almost would have preferred it if she was all panicked and scared_. But Rin had shown no real fear, from the moment Kagura had plucked her from the river. She was nervous, yes, but apparently not that her abductor would hurt her. She was likely more concerned with what might happen to her when they arrived at their destination, or who would be waiting for them. As well she should be. Naraku’s orders had been clear and concise. _"Kidnap Rin and bring her here."_ ‘Here’ being the small mountain dwelling where he’d taken up residence.

Kagura was almost positive that she knew exactly what awaited them when they arrived. Naraku had known that Sesshoumaru would pursue her if she took Rin, and would not slow his pace so Inuyasha’s group could keep up. The daiyoukai was far too arrogant for that, and to this point her master had predicted his adversary’s moves perfectly. Sesshoumaru was indeed following her, a tiny speck on the horizon discernable only to youkai eyes, and even then only if she squinted. He was likely gaining on her gradually, and would probably catch her by the end of the day, if she had to hazard a guess. Not that the pursuit would last that long. She had almost reached Naraku’s lair already, and there would end the chase, as well as Sesshoumaru’s life. For Naraku and an army of youkai would be waiting. Even if the multitude of lesser youkai weren’t enough to overwhelm the daiyoukai, Naraku’s barrier, miasma, and invulnerability would finish the job. No one could kill him without destroying Hakago first, not even Sesshoumaru. It was a testament to Naraku’s cowardice that he had taken so long to exploit his invincibility in a one-on-one battle.

Even knowing this, Kagura saw no alternative to obeying her master’s orders. If she changed course or gave Rin back to Sesshoumaru, then Naraku would execute her. It would be a pointless sacrifice. If Naraku wanted to engage Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha’s group separately, he would find a way to split them apart. Her betrayal would only delay the inevitable. Guilt weighed heavily upon her shoulders, but all was not lost. Even if Sesshoumaru died here today, as long as Inuyasha’s group survived, and possessed the final shard of the Shikon no Tama, then there was still hope. Hope for Naraku’s death, and for freedom.

"Shut up, kid," she snapped gruffly, taking her frustration out on her captive. "We’re almost there."

Kagura sighed. _I’m sorry, Rin._ Naraku had instructed her to bring the girl to his lair, but hadn’t told her what to do with her afterwards. If possible, she would take her to a human settlement and let her live a normal life. She would even plead with her master to allow this if necessary. Rin was just a young girl, completely innocent in all of this, not that such a thing would matter to Naraku. The only way Kagura could see Rin coming out of this alive was if Naraku was so jubilant about his victory over Sesshoumaru that he decided to be merciful for a change, or if he forgot about her. The latter was more likely, especially if she could spirit Rin away during the battle. As hopeless as it seemed, Kagura vowed to do what she could for Rin. At least that would ease her conscience somewhat.

At last the wooden building nestled in the mountains came into view. From a distance, there appeared to be nothing out of the ordinary, but Kagura was sure that would cease to be the case as she moved closer. To her surprise, no foreign presence made itself known, even as she dismounted her feather and landed on the building’s exterior platform. She looked around, perplexed, but the place seemed completely abandoned. _What the hell is going on here?_ Finally the main door opened, but instead of Naraku, it was Kanna who stepped over the threshold and into the open air. Kagura peered into the room behind her older sister, but found it empty.

"Kanna, what’s going on? Where’s Naraku?"

"Take Rin inside and keep her there," Kanna responded in her usual monotone, ignoring the question.

"What? Why?"

"Those are Naraku’s orders."

Kagura frowned, narrowing her eyes in consternation. This was all wrong. Why would Naraku lure Sesshoumaru here, only to confront him with Kanna, who at best could perhaps delay the daiyoukai for a short while? It didn’t make any sense. Or rather, it didn’t make any sense under the assumption that Naraku’s target was in fact Sesshoumaru. An assumption Kagura was now regretting. _Shit! Naraku never wanted to fight Sesshoumaru first. He was going after Inuyasha’s group all along!_

"Kanna, where’s Naraku?"

"Naraku ordered me not to tell you."

"Well, then where’s Hakago?"

"Naraku ordered me n—"

"DAMMIT!!!"

Kagura clenched her fists in frustration. Naraku had planned this perfectly; he had fooled everyone involved and covered every conceivable eventuality. Right now he was surely making preparations to destroy Inuyasha’s group once and for all, if he hadn’t done so already. And anyone who might be interested in betraying him had been suitably checked. She had been sent on a fool’s errand, and who knew where Hakago was? Probably hidden away in a secure place which only Naraku knew the location of. _Well, not_ only _Naraku…_ Even in this miserable situation, there was a faint light of hope, namely the eerily pale girl standing before her. Kanna had always held Naraku’s trust, and even if he hadn’t told her of his plans, she could see things with her mirror that no one else could. The trouble was that Kanna had never shown any inclination to betray their mutual master. She might not even be capable of feeling any sort of yearning for freedom, or understanding the meaning of the word. Still, it was the only way Kagura could see of upsetting Naraku’s carefully-constructed plans. As unlikely as it was to meet with success, she had to try. If she failed, Inuyasha’s group would perish, and she herself soon after.

"Kanna," she said gently, kneeling down and placing her hands on the girl’s shoulders as she gazed into those black, vacant eyes. "I need you to tell me where Naraku and Hakago are."

"Naraku ordered m—"

"I _know_ Naraku ordered you not to," Kagura interrupted, trying very hard to reign in her impatience. She attempted to craft her words calmly and soothingly, as she imagined a parent might speak to a young child. "But I need you to tell me anyway."

"Naraku ord—"

"DAMMIT!!!" And with that, playing nice officially went out the window.

"Kanna, do you know what’s gonna happen to me—to _us_ —if Naraku wins? He’s gonna fucking kill us! We’ll be lucky if it’s quick and painless, but I’m not optimistic. He’s always said that you don’t feel pain, or fear, or _anything_ , but I don’t believe it. How can a person exist and not be able to feel?"

Here Kagura paused to see if her speech had garnered any sort of response from Kanna, but no such luck. Either the girl really didn’t feel any emotions, or she was an expert at hiding them. Staring into those lifeless eyes, Kagura’s heart sank. _That’s it, then. I’m…I’m going to die today._ It was not as though she had never contemplated the idea of death; she’d lived under its constant threat ever since her creation. But never before had she been forced to regard its imminent arrival as a certainty. Even against the Yomotsu-shikome, there had always been a slim hope of escape. Here, there was none. Unless Hakago was found, Naraku could not be killed. And if Naraku survived, then she would not. It was that simple.

All of the strength in Kagura’s legs suddenly deserted her, and she sank to the ground, lungs heaving for air. It was an odd experience, to hyperventilate like this. She’d always been strong, hadn’t she? She’d lived her life with courage and determination, never letting the threat hanging over her head turn her into a sniveling weakling. But here, at the end, her resolve was wavering, and she found that there was nothing she wouldn’t do to preserve her continued existence. She’d cry, she’d beg, she’d probably even fuck him if he promised to spare her life. She wasn’t ready to find out if an afterlife awaited her, the unholy spawn of some deranged monster. She wasn’t ready for nothingness.

"I don’t," she whispered as moisture pooled in her eyes. "I don’t…want to die. I don’t want to die!"

Then the dam broke, and tears began flowing freely down her cheeks. She didn’t start balling uncontrollably; she simply cried quietly to herself, as emotions long held back finally burst forth. She was tired, so very tired—of being strong, of waging her futile war for freedom. She was tired of living as Naraku’s slave, tired of striving so hard to become something more. Most of all, she was tired of disappointment. If there was one good thing about death, it was that she could finally stop fighting. Though it frightened her, in nothingness she would at least find peace.

After several minutes, Kagura’s tears wound down to sniffles, and she took a deep, shuddering breath. She crawled over to the wall of the building and leaned against it, closing her eyes as her body entered a state of exhausted relaxation. It was not contentment, but she did experience a measure of acceptance. Soon Sesshoumaru would come to rescue his lost ward. Perhaps he would do her a favor and kill her before Naraku got the chance. More likely, he’d glare at her for a moment in that silently fierce way of his, then leave without looking back. She doubted that he’d show her any sympathy, not that he had really ever shown her any emotion at all. Perhaps it was better that way. Still, she was glad that she would get to see him one more time, before the end. The thought was enough to twist her lips upward in the faintest ghost of a smile.

She heard soft footsteps coming closer, but she couldn’t sense Sesshoumaru’s aura so she knew it wasn’t him. She opened her eyes expecting to see Rin, but instead it was Kanna standing before her, gazing down at her with her usual expressionless visage. But Kagura’s heart skipped a beat as she noticed her sister’s eyes, which seemed to be looking directly into her soul, perhaps truly seeing her for the first time.

"You wish to live…so dearly?" the girl said at last. Kagura bolted upright as hope welled within her once more, and she reached out to grasp Kanna’s hands tightly. Her skin was cold to the touch as always, but somehow she seemed less lifeless than before.

"Yes, I do," she answered, gazing deeply into her sister’s hauntingly dark eyes. For several moments Kanna only continued to stare, and finally the oppressive silence became too much for Kagura to bear.

"Dammit, Kanna," she swore, her voice soft and pleading this time instead of angry. "Yes, I want to live. I’ve been alive this whole time, but I’ve never really _lived_. Everything I’ve done has been about Naraku—either following his orders or trying to find a way to be free of him. I want to live for myself, for _me_. I want to do things just because I felt like it. I want to know how it feels to travel wherever the wind takes me, or do something insanely spontaneous. I’ve never swam in the ocean or lied with a man or even _laughed_ , Kanna. There are so many experiences out there, waiting for me. I just want the chance to live some of them. Will you help me?"

Kanna regarded her silently, but this time Kagura resolved to wait patiently for her answer. Time stretched on with agonizing slowness, but in reality it was probably only a few seconds before Kanna spoke.

"Naraku ordered me not to tell you where he or Hakago are," she declared at last, and Kagura’s heart sank. She dropped her sister’s hands and slumped against the wood at her back, fervently wishing that Kanna had just left her alone to die in peace. Yet more false hope, yet more disappointment.

"But," the girl stated in a voice barely above a whisper, perking her sister’s interest. "Perhaps…I could show you. Take my hand." She held out her tiny appendage, and as Kagura met her gaze she swore she saw a fleeting flicker of emotion light up her sister’s black depths. Then it was gone and the darkness returned, though something remained behind. Kanna was no longer empty.

Kagura took her hand. She gasped, resisting the urge to cry out as Kanna’s power lifted her high into the air, soaring off into the sky. Past great mountains they flew, over lush plains and rushing rivers, many times faster than she had ever flown before. Onward they raced, until at last they stopped to hover over a seemingly random location in the middle of an ancient forest. Looking down, Kagura spied a break in the trees where a stream flowed over a small waterfall into a pond. Kanna took her lower, so she could see under the trees hanging over the water. No one was visible, but Kagura instinctively knew who she would find if she were to actually travel there. As soon as her mind reached that conclusion, they were off, once again launched into the beautiful blue sky. This time Kanna took them to a ruined castle, an old graveyard for hundreds of human corpses. Again, Kagura realized what her sister was trying to tell her. Then her world went dark, and it took her a few moments to realize that she was gazing at the inside of her eyelids. When she blinked them open, she was back at Naraku’s lair, the quaint cottage nestled in the mountains.

"Wow," she muttered, awed by Kanna’s power, and even more so by the fact that her sister had decided to share such crucial information with her. The ‘tell me-show me’ distinction that Kanna had drawn was an extremely weak justification for disobeying Naraku’s order. She knew damn well that her actions constituted a definite betrayal of her master, but she had done it anyway. _Because I asked her to…because she cares about me more than she cares about him._ It was a humbling revelation, and Kagura vowed to take the time to properly express her gratitude at the earliest opportunity. But for now, she had some unfinished business to take care of. She grabbed Kanna and a startled Rin and took to the air once more, pushing the limits of her feather’s capabilities along their previous line of flight. Only then did she glance over her shoulder to check on the proximity of their pursuer.

"Shit," she cursed, upon finding that Sesshoumaru was far closer than she would have liked. He must now be visible even to Rin’s human eyes, though she probably wouldn’t be able to identify him as anything more than a speck against the sky. That would soon change. _Not if I can help it_ , Kagura vowed. Rin had to stay with her. Sesshoumaru had a crucial task to complete, and she couldn’t afford for him to be saddled with a helpless human girl. The trick was going to be convincing the daiyoukai that his ward was safe in her care.

"Is that—Sesshoumaru-sama?" Rin called, shielding her eyes from the sun’s rays. "Sesshoumaru-sama? Sesshoumaru-sama! Sesshou—mmpphhh!"

"Quiet, Rin!" Kagura snapped as she clamped her hand over the girl’s mouth, just firmly enough to stifle her cries. Sesshoumaru probably couldn’t hear her at this distance, but fairly soon he would be able to. And that was something Kagura had to prevent, if she had any hope of reasoning with the daiyoukai.

"Sesshoumaru has an important job to do!" she told Rin. When the girl only continued to struggle, Kagura pinned her arms to her sides and pulled her back against her chest. Her free hand remained clamped over Rin’s mouth, swung to and fro by her constant squirming and moistened by her tears. _Shit, if Sesshoumaru finds out about this he’ll kill me for sure._ Rin had been calm before, but now that she could see something which might be her guardian coming to rescue her, she seemed determined to reach out to him. And the fact that she was being restrained from doing so had her on the verge of panic. Kagura scrambled for anything which might pacify the girl without hurting her.

"Do you want Inuyasha to die?!" she finally demanded, a question which had the desired effect—Rin froze and panned her eyes up to meet her captor’s gaze. Inuyasha was but a casual acquaintance to the girl, but her heart was apparently big enough to wish for his well-being.

"Inuyasha and his friends will die unless Sesshoumaru helps them," Kagura promised gravely, which was not a lie, though it wasn’t the whole truth either. "Do you want that?" Rin’s shoulders slumped in dejection, but she shook her head. "If I take my hand away from your mouth, are you gonna scream?" Rin shook her head again, more firmly this time. Kagura pulled her hand away, though she did continue to hold the girl securely in her lap. True to her word, Rin made no effort to scream, which was not to say that she remained silent.

"Wh-why c-c-can’t I go w-with him?"

Kagura grimaced, knowing that another lie was in order. She couldn’t very well tell Rin that she would slow Sesshoumaru down because she was a weak human. Not without being unnecessarily cruel, that is.

"Where Sesshoumaru is going is very dangerous," she replied gently. "He wouldn’t be able to take you with him."

Rin pouted, her bottom lip trembling, but she didn’t protest that explanation. Still, the pitiful display made Kagura feel rather terrible, so she tried to offer what reassurances she could.

"Don’t cry, Rin. You’re important to Sesshoumaru, so…you’re important to me, too. I’ll protect you with my life, okay?"

Rin stared up at her in shock for a moment, but when she nodded, much of the despair had vanished from her gaze. Kagura favored her with a grin which the girl did not return, but her eyes did brighten considerably. Finally the wind sorceress released her hold, depositing Rin behind her on the feather once more. She was surprised to feel the light tug of a small hand holding the sleeve of her kimono, but she didn’t mind. She saw no reason to deny Rin that small comfort.

With that matter taken care of, Kagura turned to the crucial task at hand. She inhaled a deep breath, then released it slowly, allowing the action to ease the tension in her body. She repeated this cycle several more times, focusing her mind toward the task she must complete. She had never used her power in this way before, but she believed that she would succeed. She had to; there was no room for failure. _I am the wind…the wind is mine to command…I am the wind…_ Finally, she judged that she was ready, and held out her hand behind her.

"Kanna," she whispered. "Once more, please show me the way."

There was a momentary hesitation, but then Kanna took her hand. United at last, the two sisters joined their power, becoming something more than Naraku’s servants. And in doing so, each experienced true freedom for the first time.

* * *

Sesshoumaru glanced down briefly as he passed over the small wooden building, then focused on his target once more. _This is where they stopped for a significant period of time earlier._ He didn’t know why Kagura had chosen to land here, but it mattered not. It was the least of the many questions the wind sorceress would answer for, an encounter which would take place much sooner than expected thanks to her inexplicable pause. He felt his blood boil at Kagura’s betrayal. Whether the wind sorceress’ actions could be accurately termed a ‘betrayal’ was a moot point, as far as Sesshoumaru was concerned. _I should have killed the wench long ago. She claims to desire freedom from Naraku, yet she still follows his orders._ An uncomfortable feeling settled in his gut at the thought of slaying Kagura, but he ignored it. The wench had better have a most persuasive explanation for her behavior. Otherwise, he would reduce her to dust to blow away in her precious wind. No one took that which was under his protection.

A strong gust of wind buffeted him, but he plowed through it without slowing his pace. He was sure he had imagined the almost familiar quality of the air, and the way the wind seemed to be reaching out to him, as if in greeting. A second gust, gentler this time, showed the error of that assumption.

_"Sesshoumaru…"_

"Kagura," he said aloud, before he could stop himself. The wind blew again, and he heard her chuckle.

_"So, you remember my name."_

Sesshoumaru ignored the happiness in her voice, and the almost sensual caress of the wind against his face. It was as though she was taking a measure of him for the last time, her power over the air replacing her visual senses. It felt like a farewell.

"Cease your flight and surrender Rin to me. Now," he ordered, a hard edge to his tone.

Kagura sighed. _"You must listen to me, Sesshoumaru. If I do as you ask, you and Rin will die by Naraku’s hands."_

"Preposterous." The very notion that he, the mighty Sesshoumaru, would perish at the hands of a lowly hanyou was the height of absurdity.

 _"You are blinded by your pride,"_ she told him, which stunned him for a moment, since no one ever dared to speak to him in such a manner. Perhaps sensing an opportunity, Kagura pressed her case.

_"You believe yourself capable of slaying Naraku, but you are not. As long as his detached heart remains safe, Naraku is invincible."_

Sesshoumaru frowned. _Detached heart?_ He thought back to a recent conversation with Inuyasha. The hanyou had mentioned something about Naraku’s heart being outside of his physical body, but had seemed reluctant to share any further information. As if there was something he didn’t want his elder half-brother to know. Sesshoumaru had let the matter go, believing any such knowledge to be trivial. Naraku existed, therefore he could be killed. Or so he had thought at the time. Now, he wasn’t so sure.

"Why are you telling me this, wind sorceress?" In response, Sesshoumaru felt a new power brushing against his consciousness, one which his mental defenses rejected with ease.

_"Sesshoumaru, you must trust me. Let me show you…"_

"Show me what?" he demanded, but there was no answer. Again the new power prodded his mind, seeking permission to enter. Sesshoumaru held it at bay, debating what course to take. Finally, curiosity won out over caution. He sensed that the strange power was too weak to seriously damage his mind, and that its intent was benevolent at any rate. He relaxed his defenses, and allowed the foreign presence to take him on a spectacular journey, soaring through the air at a speed not even he could come close to matching. They stopped at only two locations, and when the exhibition was over, the power receded, leaving only confusion behind, along with a memory of the journey burned into his subconscious.

 _"Go to the lake, Sesshoumaru,"_ Kagura urged. _"There you will find the key to defeating Naraku."_

The wind which had been swirling around him suddenly subsided, and Sesshoumaru sensed that its wielder had said her peace. The decision was in his hands now, and the daiyoukai found himself oddly torn. His strong desire to protect Rin warred with the rational part of his mind, which was at least partially convinced that there was something to Kagura’s request, something of great importance. Ultimately, it came down to this: did he trust Kagura? Did he trust her judgment, that her advice was sound? Beyond that, did he trust her intentions, that she wasn’t leading him into a trap, or keeping him separated from Rin so Naraku could continue to use her as a hostage? If she was being truthful, then perhaps she had an honorable reason for keeping Rin from him. But that was the whole question, and it was a difficult one.

Sesshoumaru’s pace gradually slowed, until at last he drew to a halt and hovered several dozen meters in the air. The answer at which he had finally arrived shocked him to the core. He trusted Kagura, completely and on all counts. He knew not why this intuition was so strong, but it came from deep within him, from his sense of instinct. It had never led him astray before, and he was not about to start doubting it now. In the blink of an eye he was gone, soaring into the unknown, toward the small lake in the ancient forest, which evidently held the key to slaying his most hated enemy.

"You will take care of her, Kagura," he said aloud, unsure if she heard him. "You will protect her with your life."

Somehow, he trusted that she would.

* * *

Sesshoumaru stood still, stonily regarding the figure before him. She rose to her feet and met his gaze unflinchingly, simultaneously surprised and pleased to see him. He recalled that she had never been afraid of him; she had even stood up to him on several occasions. The fact that he could end her life with nothing more than the flick of his wrist had never seemed to matter to her when Inuyasha’s life was in jeopardy. This, however, was not the foolishly headstrong human woman who challenged him where sensible people would flee in fear. Her eyes and facial expression gave it away, but he could also detect a faint aura of foreign youki about her. This woman—Kagome, if he remembered correctly—was no longer in control of her own body. Most interesting, indeed. _So this is what Inuyasha did not wish for me to discover…_

"You are the spawn of Naraku," he declared, his eyes widening slightly as a new thought occurred to him. "You are Naraku’s detached heart."

Kagome chuckled, speaking with a tone which confirmed her happiness at his arrival. "You are quite observant, Sesshoumaru. I assume your presence here is Kagura’s doing?"

The daiyoukai’s eyes narrowed; he misliked the smug confidence of this wom—incarnation. He would not think of her as Inuyasha’s wench. The mind and soul belonged to Naraku; the body was just an empty shell. Though perhaps ‘empty’ was not the correct term, given her delicate condition. Never had his opinion of his half-brother sunk so low as it did now, for only a complete and utter fool would allow the woman carrying his child to be kidnapped by a rival. Inuyasha had, however, been wise to attempt to keep her abduction a secret from him. Sesshoumaru’s hand settled on Tokijin’s hilt, and he drew the sword with deliberate menace. His opponent’s smile only widened.

"It is certainly in your best interests to slay me, Sesshoumaru. But would you really kill your own brother’s beloved woman, and your unborn nephew?"

"That abomination is no blood of mine," the daiyoukai snapped fiercely. "And if you are counting on a human wench and a mongrel brat to still this Sesshoumaru’s sword, you will be sorely disappointed."

"Kukuku, I am not disappointed at all. I can only marvel at your mindset. A daiyoukai through and through. But unfortunately for you, I have no intention of allowing you to kill me."

For just a moment, the barrier surrounding the creature which was Naraku’s heart became visible. But it was enough to give Sesshoumaru pause. He was normally skilled at analyzing the likely outcome of a battle before it was joined, and his intuition was telling him that neither his power nor Tokijin’s would be enough to break that barrier. He was debating whether to make an attempt anyway when the woman spoke once more.

"I see that you’ve realized the hopelessness of defeating me. That is good. Perhaps now we can accomplish something. I’m sure you’ve wondered why Kagura sent you here?" Sesshoumaru made no reply, but his stern silence was an answer in and of itself. "I know not how Kagura learned of my location, but I am very glad that she did. Before you arrived, I had started to think that I was doomed. Naraku left me here, with nothing to do except wait for him to return. I could sense the twilight of my existence fast approaching. Then you appeared, and gave me hope. Hope that I will not be reabsorbed into that bastard’s body. Hope that you will help me kill him before he kills both of us."

"Hmph, so you desire Naraku’s death as well?"

"Can you blame me, knowing what he is? He has had but one truly loyal incarnation, and my guess is that she played a crucial role in guiding you here. So, what will it be, Sesshoumaru? Will you fly off to fight a brave but futile battle against Naraku by yourself, or will you listen to my alternate proposal?"

"Speak," the daiyoukai ordered. He would listen, but his patience was wearing thin.

"Fair enough. It is true that I am the physical embodiment of Naraku’s heart, which he cast out inside Mount Hakurei in order to gain the ability to kill Kikyou. It is also true that he cannot be slain while I still live. If I were an honorable person, I would lower my barrier and allow you to kill me here and now. But I value my own life far too much for that. I am, however, willing to assume substantial risk toward the goal of destroying Naraku and gaining my freedom. The only thing I lack is a means of transit—these weak human legs are worthless. Take me to Naraku’s castle, Sesshoumaru. There, I will help you eliminate him, once and for all."

Sesshoumaru snorted lightly. "And how will you accomplish this?"

"It matters not," Kagome replied quickly, _too_ quickly in the daiyoukai’s opinion. "You lose nothing by taking me to the castle, and you potentially gain the means to destroy Naraku. All I desire is an opportunity. The one thing I can say for sure is that if you proceed to the castle without me, you will die by Naraku’s hand."

Sesshoumaru considered this proposal carefully, more than a little suspicious. Clearly this incarnation did not have a well-formed plan for slaying his sire. But it was as he said; bringing him to the castle would do no harm. Kagura had directed him here, to this place to meet with this person. Therefore, she must believe that this incarnation had a crucial role to play in bringing about Naraku’s destruction. Again, Sesshoumaru decided to trust her judgment.

In moments, they were on their way, the daiyoukai flying and Inuyasha’s human wench clinging to his trailing mokomoko-sama. He sensed that the barrier was still firmly in place, so he made no effort eliminate his passenger. Her eyes were closed and she seemed to be deep in thought, which was fine with Sesshoumaru. Journeying in silence was by far the most pleasant way to travel, especially when the company was undesirable. The sooner he rid himself of the stench of his half-brother’s unborn spawn, the better.

Onward they soared, growing closer and closer to a long-awaited date with destiny.

* * *

Kagome hovered in a blissful state of pre-wakefulness, as sleep slowly subsided and awareness returned. Judging by how groggy she felt, it had been some time since she’d last regained consciousness, probably a few days at least. Still, as always it was a relief to wake up. Each time she succumbed to the pull of slumber, she wondered if this time it would be permanent.

Still, it was not so bad being a prisoner in her own body. Most of the time she remained unconscious, and she could not say that she was suffering. Neither could she honestly claim to be living; she was merely existing, her physical form obeying an outsider’s commands. But her abductor’s supremacy was not absolute. Periodically, the true Kagome would rise from her forced hibernation, her sense of self firmly intact. The first time had been shortly after Naraku’s infant corrupted her heart. She felt a surge of miko power, and had opened her eyes to find herself standing before none other than the dark hanyou himself. She’d only remained conscious for a few moments, but it was enough for her to figure out what had happened. She noted Naraku’s enraged expression and the smoke wafting from his hand, as well as the sound of her own voice speaking words of explanation even though she hadn’t ordered her lips and larynx to form them. Her spiritual energy had responded to her innate yet unspoken desire to protect her child, and its activation had roused her from her involuntary slumber. Then the infant comprehended her awareness and exerted pressure on her mind, forcing her to lose consciousness again.

It always ended that way. She’d never been allowed to remain awake for more than a couple minutes at most. And it only happened when her captor lost focus, or when one of her friends was in danger nearby. The last time, she’d been able to observe a portion of Inuyasha’s battle inside the youkai graveyard. She saw him finally penetrate the diamond-youkai’s back with Tetsusaiga, then watched in horror as he was viciously swatted away. Her last glimpse before her world went dark was the sight of her hanyou, gravely wounded, plummeting into the abyss. She’d blacked out wondering if she would ever see him again, or if he would die in that graveyard, broken and alone. That fear still remained, eating away at her and churning her proverbial stomach. She sincerely hoped that she would learn the truth of what had happened before the infant forced her to sleep again. If Inuyasha was really dead, and Naraku possessed the completed Shikon no Tama, she had a feeling that her remaining time on this earth was going to be brief, and pure hell.

But Inuyasha had come through worse, so she would maintain her faith until it was proven to be in vain. He was still the man she loved, and the warrior she respected. Being awake for less than ten minutes during the entire period since her abduction had not afforded her much time for reflection, and her sleep was blessedly dreamless. If she ever regained her freedom, she would consider in detail all of the wicked words the infant had used to poison her mind. And at that time, she would determine if they held any merit. Inuyasha’s statement in the graveyard came back to her. _"If I can’t…save Kagome…then nothing else matters!"_ What those words did or did not mean, Kagome couldn’t say. And it didn’t really matter; none of it did. What mattered was her decision, independent of anything Inuyasha could do or say. She wanted to live. She wanted to be a mother. That desire had never wavered, but she’d succumbed to the infant’s influence in a moment of weakness brought on by a broken heart. It would not happen again. Even if everything the infant said about Inuyasha was true, there were other people in this world who loved her. She would live for them, her family and friends, and her unborn child.

_"Kagome."_

The sound of that voice, high-pitched and sadistic, immediately roused Kagome to full alertness. He hadn’t spoken to her since taking over her body, so she was instantly on edge. Then her mind’s eyes reconnected with her physical ones, and she gasped. It was a dreadful scene. She was hiding behind a building on the outskirts of what used to be a great castle. Now old corpses littered the grounds, but this is not what horrified her. Though her view was partially obscured by miasma, the noxious fumes had dissipated enough for her to glimpse what the infant obviously intended for her to see. Namely, Miroku and Sango kneeling unsteadily, either wounded or poisoned, supported by Shippou and Kirara. Inuyasha stood on shaky legs nearby, clearly affected as well. And finally, she saw Naraku, who was speaking to his captive audience, likely savoring the delectable moments before he claimed his final victory.

_"Observe the plight of your friends, Kagome."_

"Why are you showing me this?!" she demanded, shouting into the abyss which imprisoned her mind.

_"Because you are the only one with the power to save them."_

Sesshoumaru had joined the battle now, but even the powerful daiyoukai’s presence would make no difference. For Kagome had learned the harsh truth—while the infant lived, Naraku could not be killed. While her body breathed, Naraku was invincible.

 _"Killing yourself is not the way,"_ the infant told her, anticipating the direction of her thoughts. _"As if I would allow any harm to come to_ my _body."_

"Then what can I do?"

_"Your spiritual energy is the key. Surrender to me, Kagome. Let your power become mine."_

Kagome heard what the infant didn’t say. If she did as he asked, she would likely never wake up again. It would essentially be committing suicide, at least in the mental sense. He’d been steadily trying to wear down her defenses since taking control of her body, but had yet to make any major progress. With this proposal he was attempting to remedy weeks of frustration in one fell swoop.

"If my spiritual energy is the key, then release me. I’ll defeat Naraku myself."

_"Heh, nice try, but it doesn’t work that way. If any of your friends are going to live through this, then so am I. And I guarantee that if I go back to my infant form, somebody is going to squash me."_

"They won’t! I’ll stop them, I promise."

_"Oh, wonderful. So then I guess I just lie there until I starve to death or some predator picks me off? No, thank you. Give it up, Kagome. I’d rather die than spend another moment as an infant. You have only two choices: surrender to me, or watch your friends perish."_

Kagome hesitated, scrambling for any available alternatives. If she had a lower lip, she’d be biting it right now. But despite her desperation, no inspiration came to mind, and her captor pressed his point home.

_"Do you know what’s going to happen if you refuse me, Kagome? You’ll watch your friends die, then you’ll fall asleep again. When you wake up you’ll be free of me, but Naraku’s hands will be around your throat. He’ll show you the bodies of your friends, letting you see every detail of their lifeless faces. Then he’ll tear your unborn child out of your womb and smash it on the ground. After that, he’ll likely torture you for a while, until he becomes bored of your screams. Only then will he show you the mercy of ending your miserable life. He’s been dreaming of this day for a long time, Kagome. If you let him get what he wants, you’ll end up wishing you were never born."_

Kagome bit back a sob, imaginary tears streaming down her cheeks. Hearing of this possible future was horrible enough, but what would it be like to live it? And she knew that the infant was telling the truth; if Naraku won, a terrible fate awaited her. Unless she did something to turn the tables, and soon, Naraku was going to win. But what could she do? There had to be a viable strategy other than sacrificing herself. If there was, she had yet to come up with it. And her friends were running out of time. Finally, Kagome was forced to acknowledge that there was no other option. She and her baby were likely going to die anyway; by sacrificing herself now, she at least gave her friends and the man she loved a chance to survive. It was this thought which gave her the strength to let go.

"I love you, Inuyasha. Live well."

With those final words of farewell, Kagome surrendered to oblivion.

* * *

Kagura clutched at her chest, gasping for breath. Her eyes bulged out, staring unblinkingly at her heart, clutched cruelly by Naraku’s tentacle. He was deliberately taking his time, tormenting her as he drew out her final agonizing moments. The pain was overwhelming, leaving her almost wishing for death. But mercifully, it would all be over soon.

Blinding light flared off to her left, appearing in her peripheral vision an instant before it flashed in front of her. It was an arrow, trailing a massive stream of spiritual energy which purified the miasma in the air and chased away the gloom. It struck Naraku’s tentacle, passing straight through and disintegrating the appendage all the way back to his barrier. Kagura observed her heart falling in slow motion, fading before her eyes and vanishing completely before it struck the ground. She inhaled a massive breath at the sudden rush of sensation in her chest, and as she exhaled, she experienced for the first time what it was like to be truly alive. _My heart…it’s beating…_ At long last, she was free.

Still in a state of profound disbelief, she turned to locate her savior. There she was, striding confidently forward, clad in the kimono Kagura had given her with a quiver of arrows slung over her shoulder, a bow clutched in her left hand. She wore a smug grin, as though she was genuinely enjoying the magnificence of her entrance. No one on the battlefield could find the ability to speak, as she drew to a halt before them.

"Hello, Naraku," she said in Hakago’s voice, her smile widening at his stunned expression. "I hope you don’t mind if I join the party."


	32. To the Bitter End

"Hello, Naraku. I hope you don’t mind if I join the party."

Inuyasha’s shoulders slumped in disappointment at the sound of Hakago’s voice passing through Kagome’s lips. For a few fleeting moments, he’d dared to hope that the explosive resurgence of her miko power was an indication that she’d gained her freedom, despite the uncharacteristic smirk on her face signaling otherwise. Now that her captor had confirmed that he was still in complete control, Inuyasha felt only dread. This new development was potentially terrible news; if Hakago had found a way to access her spiritual energy, then perhaps he’d managed to destroy what remained of Kagome’s consciousness as well. Perhaps she was already—

Inuyasha shook his head, resolving not to sink into despair just yet. There was still hope for Kagome, as long as her body was breathing. And he would do everything in his power to maintain her survival. Based on what Kagura had told him, Hakago would not reject his assistance. For the moment, they were allies striving toward a common goal, a fact which Naraku seemed to understand well.

"You," the dark hanyou snarled, his normally cool demeanor breaking. "How did you get here?"

"Why, Sesshoumaru carried me, of course. As you well know, I could never have reached this place on my own."

Naraku narrowed his eyes, as he appeared to comprehend what Hakago didn’t say. "Hmph, it seems it was foolish of me to place trust in any of my servants." He held out his hand, and in it materialized another beating heart, this one smaller than Kagura’s and with a slower rhythm. This time, however, Naraku kept his hand within his barrier, and Hakago made no move to fire an arrow. Inuyasha heard Kagura gasp and begin to cry out, but it was too late—her master crushed the heart with one brutal clench of his fist.

"You _bastard!_ " Kagura screamed, sending wind blades rushing at Naraku, though all bounced harmlessly off the barrier.

"You were always powerless to save yourself, Kagura," her master taunted. "And now you have failed to save your sister. Don’t worry, though, you will soon join her in hell. But first," he declared, turning to face Kagome once more, "I must put a disobedient child in his place."

"You wish to discipline me, Naraku?" Hakago sneered. "Come and try it, then. This girl has never realized the true extent of her power. I will make you cry for mercy before I purify you."

"Kukuku, you are a fool, _boy._ You should have stayed where you were told, and lived a little longer. Now, become part of my body once more."

Naraku’s tendrils emerged from the barrier and shot quickly toward Kagome, obviously intended to overwhelm her human reflexes. Fortunately, Inuyasha was ready; he lurched into a hobbling sprint and unleashed the Kaze no Kizu just before Naraku made his move. The blades of youki decimated every bit of the dark hanyou’s flesh which was outside of the barrier, but passed harmlessly over the opaque sphere as expected.

"Keep your slimy tentacles away from her," Inuyasha snarled, coming to a halt in front of Kagome.

"Aw, that’s so sweet," she observed in her own voice from behind him. "Do you really care for me that much?"

"Shut up," he snapped, refusing to allow Hakago to get to him. The infant’s impression of her ‘touched’ tone was far too good for Inuyasha’s liking. He drew comfort from the knowledge that if everything went as planned, the true Kagome might soon be speaking to him in that same manner. At long last, the wait was over. All of it would end today—Naraku’s twisted saga of violence and deceit, Kagome’s abduction, this whole rotten mess. One way or another, he would be with her soon.

The various combatants eyed each other from across the battlefield, wondering who would be the first to break the standstill. The only one capable of penetrating Naraku’s barrier was Inuyasha, who would not do so as long as his enemy held Kohaku and Rin as hostages. And any attempt by Naraku to reach Kagome would now be thwarted by Inuyasha and possibly even Sesshoumaru. But Naraku still had an ace up his sleeve, namely the hundreds of lesser youkai hovering overhead, not to mention the dozen or so puppets lurking on the edges of the battlefield. It was these minions which the dark hanyou now summoned, causing the castle to descend into chaos once more.

Inuyasha decimated a puppet approaching from his blind side, then turned in time to slice up a couple of Naraku’s tendrils which were reaching for Kagome from the opposite direction. This process repeated itself several more times, but fortunately Inuyasha’s reflexes were up to the task. But Naraku stalked slowly closer, protected by his barrier and human shields, shortening the range for his strikes. And as Inuyasha’s friends and allies slayed more and more enemies, the field once again became clouded by heavy miasma, reducing visibility and making it even more difficult for the hanyou to react effectively. Meanwhile, Kagome stood still, a sitting duck. She had closed her eyes, and though her lips were moving, no sound emerged. She appeared to be deep in concentration, the tension in her face indicating great stress, almost as though she was frantically searching for something. Inuyasha might have demanded to know what the hell Hakago was doing if he wasn’t so hard-pressed keeping Naraku’s tentacles off of Kagome’s body, while also protecting his own hide. His priority was Kagome, obviously, but if he allowed himself to be seriously wounded, then he was no longer going to be fast or strong enough to repulse Naraku’s advances against her.

The miasma burned his throat, the poison entering his bloodstream through his lungs, but he couldn’t slow his breathing. His reflexes deteriorated a little more, and a youkai managed to clamp its jaws around his midsection while he was engaged with Naraku. His fire-rat limited the damage, but the puncture wounds remained after the youkai was dispatched. The damage to his body and the loss of blood sapped his strength even further, continuing the destructive cycle. Soon Inuyasha could tell that the struggle would not last much longer. _Shit. Hakago, you’d better do something soon, or we’re both gonna die._

"Now, Kohaku," Naraku ordered suddenly, his voice almost gleeful with anticipated triumph. "Go and collect for me the final shard of the Shikon no Tama!"

Inuyasha swore under his breath, expecting to have to fight off the young taijiya now as well. But instead Kohaku darted off to the side, heading straight for his sister and her fiancé, who were currently doing their best to keep some marauding youkai at bay. _Shit, they know that Miroku has the shard!_

"Miroku! Sango!" Inuyasha bellowed, coming perilously close to having his head torn off for even that brief moment of distraction. The clash of bone-on-bone weaponry indicated that his warning had nevertheless been effective. But how long Sango and Miroku could hold out against Kohaku in their weakened states, Inuyasha couldn’t say. Regardless, though it weighed heavily upon his heart, he didn’t dare leave Kagome’s side.

His friends were on their own.

* * *

Sango grunted under the force of the blow, barely maintaining her balance as she stumbled backward. It would be easy to blame her situation on the miasma coursing through her veins, but that would be misleading. Kohaku had obviously become exponentially more skilled with his sickle-chain during his enslavement; this would be a tough battle even if she was in peak physical condition, which she most certainly was not. Kohaku’s strikes were lightning quick, and every impact of his blade against hiraikotsu sent shockwaves up her arms and into her chest. A handful of strikes in, and Sango was already wondering how long she could last. Offensive action was completely out of the question; it was all she could do to meet the sickle with hiraikotsu rather than her own flesh and bones.

The next blow was weaker than the rest, but by the time Sango realized the diversion, it was too late—the weighted end of the chain was already swinging for her vulnerable temple. All she could do was duck her head and close her eyes. The heavy iron ball bounced off the top of her skull, but even the glancing blow was enough to send her sprawling to the ground, the world spinning dizzily around her as she fought to maintain consciousness.

Miroku’s heart lodged in his throat, fearing that Kohaku would move in for the kill, but the young taijiya had another target in mind. Soon the monk found himself fighting for his own life, with even less success that his fiancé. After three barely-deflected strikes of his sickle, Kohaku pulled his victim’s legs out from under him with the chain. Miroku cracked his head against the ground as he fell onto his back, but managed to raise his hands in time to prevent Kohaku’s blade from sinking into his chest. His arms buckled under the strain as the taijiya kneeled over him, placing both hands on the handle and using his body weight to force the blade lower. Glaring up into those cold, dead eyes as his strength wavered and the sickle began to bite into his flesh, Miroku could only hope that Sango had lost consciousness. No sister should have to witness what was about to occur between her brother and fiancé.

"Kohaku…please don’t."

Her miserable, broken voice drew Miroku’s attention, as he turned his head to look into his beloved’s eyes for the last time. She was sitting up now, and though her eyes were partially unfocused, tears flowed freely down her cheeks. Miroku could tell that only Kirara’s support kept her upright, the fire-cat’s fierce growling also deterring the surrounding youkai as Shippou distracted them with his kitsune-bi. The monk was grateful that they had chosen to protect her rather than attempt to rescue him. With his gaze, he tried to convey the depths of his feelings for her, everything he had been unable to tell her with words. Her choked sob told him that she understood. And as pain blossomed in his chest, he closed his eyes and waited for nirvana. _Live, Sango. Live and be happy._

The pain in his chest suddenly lessened, which seemed odd to him. He would have expected to feel a great surge of agony as Kohaku impaled him, and only then for it to fade as his life expired. Instead his senses were telling him that he was still very much alive, and that the taijiya’s blade was no longer digging into his chest. Sure enough, when Miroku opened his eyes, he found Kohaku still straddling him, the sickle-chain held up by his shoulder, poised and ready to strike. A strike which did not come. For Kohaku’s eyes were no longer dead; some small element of life had seeped back in. But though his sister’s pleading had apparently reached him in some way, he was still very much Naraku’s servant. Which is why Miroku once again prepared himself for death when the sickle plunged downward.

Sango cried out, but instead of stabbing her beloved in the chest, Kohaku merely sliced open the front of his robes. It took him only a moment to find what he was looking for, and then he was gone, sprinting back toward his master. Only unexpected intervention prevented him from handing the stolen Shikon fragment to Naraku. A great gust of wind knocked Kohaku off balance, but he recovered quickly and flung his sickle blade into the air. Fortunately, Kagura had been smart enough to stay out of his range, and soon had him pinned to the ground with a small twister planted in his lower back, not penetrating his armour but exerting enough pressure to render him immobile.

Miroku and Kagura exchanged a grim nod. The wind sorceress had been under constant attack to this point, likely to prevent her from blowing away the miasma with her fan. But she had managed to buy herself a few precious seconds to intervene at a crucial moment. She too understood that to allow Naraku to complete the Shikon no Tama would be an utter disaster. Miroku was nevertheless extremely grateful that she had spared Kohaku’s life; he still held out hope that the boy could be saved. Grimacing, he lurched to his feet and was about to move to reclaim the shard Kohaku had stolen when a great surge of pure energy drew the attention of every combatant, friend and foe alike, across the battlefield. To the young woman standing before the pit of evil which was Naraku, spiritual power rolling off of her in waves.

Hakago was finally making his move.

* * *

"I _found it,_ " Kagome whispered, her tone equally awestruck and ecstatic. It was the first time she had spoken since Naraku’s onslaught began, but the power in those softly uttered syllables sent a shiver down Inuyasha’s spine. Her eyes snapped open at the same time her spiritual energy burst forth from her being, with an intensity she had exhibited on only a handful of previous occasions. Then her pure aura swelled even further, to a level she had never reached before. Hakago’s words came back to him. _This girl has never realized the true extent of her power._ Inuyasha had doubted the validity of that statement before, but now realized how true it was. There was nothing to hold Kagome back any longer. No emotions, no insecurities, no foolish hanyou love interest throwing her heart to the ground and stomping on it with disturbing regularity. Kagome was now what Kikyou had strived to be—a pure miko, purged of everything which made her human. Inuyasha could only pray that after this was over, she would revert back to the girl he had fallen in love with.

"Kukuku, do you honestly believe that Kagome’s power will be enough to defeat me?" Naraku taunted, though his confidence had clearly dissipated somewhat. In fact, he seemed almost driven to reassure himself that he was still the strongest person on the battlefield, even as he shrank back a few involuntary steps.

"You still cannot penetrate my barrier. You still cannot kill me!"

Hakago made no reply, other than to favor his sire with a hateful glare. Then Kagome’s eyes glazed over, her irises fading as if obscured by fog. She stared at the ground before her, seeing nothing, at least on this plane of existence. But her miko power continued to surge around her, as she searched for something no one else could see. Finally her head snapped up, her eyes clearing as her lips twisted upwards in a determined grin. Inuyasha held his breath as he watched her, utterly captivated. She raised her arms, bending them at the elbow so that her palms were facing inwardly toward each other. With a mighty cry, she slammed her hands together, the clap of her flesh punctuated by a blinding flash of light which forced Inuyasha to turn away and shield his eyes. When the light faded, there was silence on the battlefield. Kagome still stood with her hands pressed together, gazing at her abductor’s most hated enemy, Hakago’s arrogant smirk firmly in place upon her features.

Naraku was the first to break the silence, with a great hacking cough. He tried to inhale but choked, spitting up blood. It was a tremendous shock, to see the normally unflappable hanyou suffering so. Finally, Naraku drew in enough of a breath to speak, between bouts of coughing.

"You bastard…what did you do?!"

"Heh, feeling pain in your chest, Naraku?" Hakago answered coldly, in his own voice. "Is it becoming difficult to breathe? That’s because I used Kagome’s power to sever the connection between us. As of the moment I clapped my hands together, you have no heart. The truth hurts, I know, but it’s really very simple. I can live without you, but you can’t live without me. Now, go crawl into a ditch somewhere and die!"

Naraku glared at his offspring, but his body shuddered before he could reply and he dropped to a knee, blood now dripping from his nasal and ocular cavities. Pieces of his body began sloughing off and falling lifelessly to the ground. Inuyasha found it difficult to believe what he was seeing, but his senses didn’t lie. The most powerful enemy he’d ever faced was disintegrating before his eyes. Naraku was dying. And when his barrier finally flickered and vanished, Inuyasha knew the end was truly near.

Be that as it may, there was still one person in mortal peril. Inuyasha could sense his half-brother’s agitation, his desire to rush in and save his human companion. But he didn’t dare, not with Rin standing paralyzed with fear, still too close to her captor’s remaining tendrils, any of which could end her life in an instant. If they could just get her away from Naraku, then Sesshoumaru could use his speed to safely rescue her. Inuyasha waved to catch her attention, then signaled for her to come to him, all the while keeping an eye on her captor to make sure he was none the wiser. After a moment he signaled again, but Rin only continued to stare blankly at him, too frightened to move.

"Rin!" Sesshoumaru called, his exclamation simultaneously a demand and a plea. She started suddenly, turning watery eyes to her guardian, whose voice seemed to have broken her from her stupor.

"Sesshoumaru-sama!" she cried, her arms outstretched as she sprinted toward him as fast as her legs could carry her. Naraku saw what was happening and sent his tentacles after her, but Sesshoumaru was already in motion, as was Inuyasha. The hanyou charged in with Tetsusaiga raised over his head in its diamond spear form, determined to time his strike perfectly assuming his half-brother could hold up his end of the bargain. For once, Sesshoumaru did exactly what Inuyasha wanted him to, streaking in and spiriting Rin safely away just before Naraku could reach her. And that left only the two hanyou staring each other down, one set of red eyes widened in fear and the other’s golden orbs reflecting grim, merciless determination.

"Kongousouha!"

Naraku saw what was about to happen. Just as the first diamond shards began tearing into his flesh, his entire body dissolved into miasma, a thick cloud which floated away with definite purpose. It was the same manner in which he had made his escape from his last castle, though instead of soaring off into the sky like on that occasion, he merely drifted back and blended into the miasma already hovering over the battlefield.

"Shit. Where did he go?"

"Don’t worry," Hakago told him, drawing an arrow. "He’s here. He’s using the Shikon no Tama to sustain himself, but that won’t work for long. Just don’t let him get—"

A surprised shout turned Inuyasha’s attention across the field to Kagura, who had come under sudden attack by about a hundred of the remaining lesser youkai. She had obviously been targeted specifically, and the reason became clear as the tornado pinning Kohaku to the ground disappeared, leaving the boy free to leap to his feet and take off running in the direction his master had fled. Inuyasha swore under his breath and sprinted after him, not needing Hakago to tell him that Naraku obtaining the completed Shikon no Tama was a very bad thing. Kagura now had her hands full protecting her own hide, and everyone else on the battlefield was either too far away or too crippled to assist. It was just Inuyasha and Kohaku, and unfortunately the boy was working with a significant head start.

The miasma thickened in front of the young taijiya suddenly, and without hesitation he leapt into its depths. When he emerged from the other side, he fell to the ground lifelessly and lay there unmoving. Inuyasha didn’t need to approach any closer to know that Kohaku was gone. But he had no time to dwell on the loss of his friend’s brother. He skidded to a halt as a great pulse of evil energy sent a shockwave across the castle, shaking the ground beneath their feet. An ominous, wicked cackle rang out, chilling Inuyasha to the bone. The tables had turned once again. Their best chance to destroy Naraku had been lost, and now the dark hanyou seemed to feel reassured of victory. Inuyasha had always suspected that the completed Shikon no Tama would provide its wielder with significantly greater power than the sum of its parts, so the newfound vitality of Naraku’s aura came as no surprise. But surely even an item of such power could not enable a man to live indefinitely without a heart. And if that was the case, then Inuyasha had a feeling that he might come to regret leaving Kagome’s side to chase after Kohaku.

He turned to retrace his steps, but it was already too late; Naraku’s disembodied form was closing rapidly on her position. She fired an arrow, but the projectile was deflected by the sheer intensity of the evil aura and sailed away to clatter uselessly against the ground. Naraku did not give his offspring the opportunity to fire again. His body solidified into what looked like black tar, and moved to envelope Kagome in a great arc. At the last moment, she raised her hands.

The impact of Naraku’s pseudo-body against her spiritual barrier was akin to that of a giant mud ball hitting a window. The noxious slime stuck to the invisible shield, slowly expanding to cover more of the surface. Inuyasha didn’t even recall ordering his feet to move as he pushed his legs past the limits of their endurance, desperate to save his beloved. And Kagome clearly needed help. It was a small miracle that she’d been able to project the miko barrier in the first place, having never done so before, but already she had been forced to her knees, the protective sphere reduced to half its original size. As Inuyasha watched, the barrier shrunk even further, wringing a strangled cry from her throat. He caught one final glimpse of her face, scrunched up and sweating from the effort of holding her attacker at bay, before the liquefied miasma blocked his view.

"KAGOME!!!" Inuyasha cried out, at a loss for what to do. He could feel the potency of Naraku’s youki from his position a dozen meters away; if he ran over there to fight with his claws, he would die a swift and agonizing death. And he didn’t dare utilize any of Tetsusaiga’s higher attacks, since he couldn’t target the dark hanyou without also hitting Kagome. Her barrier looked like it would crumble if he threw a rock at it, never mind a Kaze no Kizu. A profound sense of helplessness settled over Inuyasha. Was this the moment when Naraku finally won? Was he doomed to watch his soul mate and unborn child be devoured before his eyes? _No!_ his heart answered. Even if it would surely kill him, even if he had only a miniscule chance of success, he would confront Naraku with his bare hands. He would wrest the Shikon no Tama from his clutches, or perish in the attempt.

"Inu…yasha?"

He froze, both ears perking up as he listened intently. He had just about decided that he was imagining things when he heard it again, so faint and strained that he couldn’t tell if Hakago was speaking in his own voice or Kagome’s.

"Kag—Hakago?!"

"Do it…Inuyasha," he ordered, and the hanyou instinctively knew what he meant. Inuyasha hesitated, having considered this course of action already and come to the conclusion that it was too risky. How could it help? Logically, the best thing that could happen was Kagome’s death, which would result in the destruction of Naraku’s heart and the dark hanyou’s own expiration soon after. Inuyasha wasn’t exactly partial to using those particular means to achieve the desired end, and he knew that Hakago wasn’t so noble as to sacrifice himself for the greater good. The only idea which made any sense was the infant’s preference for dying on his own terms rather than being reabsorbed by Naraku.

"Do it, Inuyasha! NOW!!!"

That desperate cry, delivered in Kagome’s voice, sealed it for Inuyasha. After living and traveling with her for almost a year, he had become very familiar with her voice, in all of its subtle nuances and fluctuations. That tone did not indicate a hopeless situation. It spoke of suffering, of desperation, but also of hope, and faith that with his help victory could be achieved. Hakago had not given up on his own survival, and therefore, Inuyasha would not give up on Kagome and his child.

The Kaze no Kizu the hanyou sent streaking toward Naraku then was the strongest his sword had ever produced. He watched as the blades of youki raced toward the barrier, holding his breath as the moment of impact neared. Would his attack help Hakago in some way, or would Kagome be torn apart by his own sword?

The dreaded sight and sound of a fracturing barrier never came. Tetsusaiga’s youki didn’t even pass over the opaque sphere, which was the other outcome Inuyasha had anticipated. Instead, with a burst of almost jubilant sound, the blades latched onto the barrier, swirling around it at faster and faster speeds, until the hanyou could no longer differentiate between the two normally opposing forces. That observation struck him with a profound sense of déjà vu. _It’s just like when we fought Jakotsu. Kagome and I…together we are stronger than the sum of our parts_. But were they strong enough to overcome Naraku and the corrupted Shikon no Tama? Everything depended upon the answer to that crucial question. 

The conflict raged with heart-pounding intensity, the battle lines shifting to and fro, the miasma ebbing and flowing like ocean waves. But gradually, the darkness began to recede. In a few more moments, Inuyasha was able to enjoy an unexpected blessing—the sight of her face. She grimaced as she rose to her feet, arms still outstretched in front of her, straining against the evil with all of her might. Inuyasha felt inexplicably drawn to her, and did not resist his urge to be by her side. He circled her in a shallow arc, approaching the barrier from the rear, the only portion which was completely free of Naraku’s influence. Never once did he doubt that it would allow him entrance.

Once inside, he permitted himself a moment’s indulgence, as he savored his first physical contact with her since her abduction. Incredible warmth emanated from where her body was pressed against his own, even through multiple layers of clothing. The scent of her hair, somewhat dirty but completely natural, free of any modern chemicals, was indescribable. The rapid sound of her heartbeat resonated through his body, soothing his wounded soul. Everything was all right. He was by her side again. It didn’t matter who controlled her physical form, not when he could almost feel her soul embracing him, whispering words of love in his ears and swelling his heart to bursting. At last, he was home. He embraced her from behind, ensconcing her in the voluminous sleeves of his haori. Then he held Tetsusaiga in front of them, gripping the hilt with both hands. He didn’t need to tell her to place her palms on the blade.

The power which exploded from them shook the heavens, awing even the sun with its brightness. But though the light was blinding, Inuyasha found no need to close his eyes. This was something he and Kagome had created, something almost as beautiful as the tiny life which they were trying to save. From far off he heard Naraku’s voice, shocked and despairing, full of lamentations and cursing the world which had rejected him. But Inuyasha had gone to a place where Naraku’s hate could no longer reach him. A place where, with his beloved by his side, he could do anything. With love in his heart, he tightened his grip on Tetsusaiga’s hilt, and made one final effort.

Naraku screamed, and the world ceased to be.

* * *

Inuyasha groaned, holding his head as he sat up, blinking his eyes against the bright sunshine. Mildly disoriented, he glanced at his surroundings, his memories quickly falling back into place. No trace of miasma remained on the battlefield, and there was not a single cloud in the sky. It was amazing, how the late afternoon sun could make him blink and look away, when the pure, glorious light he and Kagome had produced had been perfectly comfortable to behold.

"Kagome!" he recalled, scanning frantically and locating her form a few meters away. She lay on the ground, apparently unconscious, her breathing smooth and regular. His nerves suddenly in tatters, Inuyasha crawled to her side and pulled her torso into his lap. He shook her gently, tapping her cheek lightly to wake her, all the while wondering whose mind he was rousing from slumber. He swore the true Kagome had embraced him in some form during the final confrontation with Naraku. But had that last surge of spiritual energy allowed her consciousness to fight its way free of Hakago’s influence? Or had the infant been able to use her power even to such an extent without losing control?

He was about to find out. Kagome blinked her eyes open, staring up at him for a few moments as she shook off her disorientation. Even as her gaze cleared, she gave nothing away, and finally Inuyasha could take the silent stare no longer.

"K-Kagome?"

The instant her lips twisted into that familiar smirk, Inuyasha knew what the next words out of her mouth were going to be. He had heard them before, after all.

"Do you honestly still believe that I’m Kagome?"


	33. Replacement Body

Miroku groaned, running his hand over his face as he pulled himself into a sitting position. All around him, the other survivors of the battle were doing the same. A category of individuals which did not include Naraku. Whatever Inuyasha and Kagome—or Hakago—had done, no trace of the once formidable dark hanyou remained. The overwhelming discharge of energy which had knocked everyone unconscious for a few moments had also purged the air of the previously pervasive miasma. In addition, it had apparently at least partially purified the toxins already in his system, as his body felt significantly lighter than it had before he blacked out. Grinning to himself, Miroku raised his right hand and took the time to study his unblemished palm for the first time in over a decade. _No trace of Naraku, indeed._

But his jubilation was short-lived. As soon as he turned to gaze at his fiancée, he was reminded that although Naraku was finally dead, some of the damage he’d wrought upon the world would never be healed. Sango was struggling to rise to her feet, her solemn stare fixed firmly upon the body of her recently deceased brother. Miroku hurriedly rushed over to her, steadying her with an arm around her waist and allowing her to lean against him. It was no wonder she was dizzy; he could see the outline of the large lump on her head even through her hair. Slowly they made their way over to Kohaku, as Sango mourned silently. Her fist clenched the front of his robes tightly, her nails digging into his skin, but Miroku made no complaint.

They found the boy lying on his stomach, his head turned away from them, his arms splayed out to the side at awkward angles. Miroku leaned over and discovered that his eyes were wide in death, though it appeared that in his final moments he had been free of Naraku’s control. Nonetheless, Miroku closed the eyes before he turned Kohaku over, glad that he’d been able to spare Sango from that sight at least. He wanted her final memories of her brother to be of a young man at peace, not of an unfortunate boy taken before he could truly enjoy what life had to offer. He arranged Kohaku with his arms leaning against his midsection, his taijiya weapon resting upon his chest. He put the boy’s hair into some semblance of order and cleaned a smudge from his cheek. Then he folded his hands, closed his eyes, and began to pray.

His message was simple. A cheerful boy, loved by his family and friends, who suffered a great tragedy through no fault of his own. This boy, finally free of the shackles which had bound him, would find peace and forgiveness in the next life, where his father already waited for him with open arms. Sometime during his heartfelt eulogy, the dam on Sango’s emotions broke; she cried quietly at his side, her hands again clenched into fists in her lap. Miroku recognized the gesture—it was the warrior’s mentality, to mourn for the dead, but also to feel anger, and wonder if there was anything which could have been done differently to avoid such a tragic fate. In the monk’s humble opinion, there was not. When he was finished speaking, he looped his arm around Sango’s shoulders and held her, gripping one of her hands with his free hand. She leaned bonelessly into him, accepting of his comfort, even if she could not yet accept her brother’s fate. But Miroku knew that would come eventually; with his love and the support of their friends, Sango would heal. They sat there for several minutes, mourning together in silence.

"Poor Kohaku-kun," Rin’s voice stated suddenly, and Miroku raised his eyes to find Sesshoumaru standing before them, his young ward still held in his arm with Shippou clinging to the back of her kimono. The daiyoukai seemed to be of the opinion that all of this was beneath him; at any rate, he clearly was not here of his own volition.

"And you think Sesshoumaru-sama can help him?" Rin asked, to which Shippou nodded enthusiastically. Then she turned her doe eyes on the daiyoukai, who might have sighed and rolled his own eyes if he wasn’t so stoic. At once Miroku found himself impressed by Shippou’s cleverness. Ask Sesshoumaru directly to save Kohaku, and you’d be lucky if he settled for merely ignoring you. Get Rin to ask him _for_ you, however, and your odds of persuading him increased tremendously. He gazed down at Kohaku for a few moments, then set Rin on her feet and drew Tenseiga. He closed his eyes and held the sword up to his forehead, conversing with it silently. When those piercing golden orbs snapped open again, he focused on Sango, the question in his sharp gaze unmistakable.

Sango initially had no response ready; she was clearly torn by the decision which had been set out before her. Miroku wondered what it would be like to find himself in her position, but his imagination fell short. It was an impossible dilemma, one which could haunt her for the rest of her days no matter which course she chose. But ultimately, it was her choice to make. Miroku wanted to help, but he bit his tongue, knowing that she would turn to him if she desired his input. After a few moments of silently contemplating, Sango did just that, her eyes practically pleading with him to tell her what was right. That was not something Miroku could do, but he could share his honest opinion.

"There is no way to know what Kohaku would have wanted," he stated solemnly, "whether that be a peaceful death, or a second chance at life. However…if Sesshoumaru-sama does revive him, then he will at least have the opportunity to make that decision for himself."

Relief flashed in her dark orbs, and it was clear that her thoughts had already been running along similar lines. She had probably feared that her deep love for her brother was clouding her judgment, and Miroku was glad to be able to put that concern to rest. Hopefully, both Sango’s and Kohaku’s desires could be honored. And if Kohaku could not be convinced that life was worth living, even a life dedicated to atoning for his self-perceived sins, then he could choose to die. He could walk into a nest of youkai, or even commit seppuku as the samurai did. But at least then it would be Kohaku’s decision.

Jaw set with confidence now, Sango nodded to Sesshoumaru. The daiyoukai swung his sword only once, appearing to cut empty air. Then he returned Tenseiga to his side, turned and stalked off, leaving four living humans behind him, whereas before there had been only three. Kohaku was now enjoying a less permanent sleep, his chest rising and falling steadily with his breathing.

"Tell Kohaku-kun that Rin says hi!" the girl called as she ran to catch up with her guardian. Coming to a quick decision, Miroku scrambled to his feet and jogged after them. When he said Sesshoumaru’s name, the daiyoukai stopped and turned his head, favoring the monk with a one-eyed glower which clearly indicated that there was a time limit on this conversation. Fortunately, Miroku didn’t have much to say.

"We are in your debt," he stated, bowing low. He expected Sesshoumaru to scoff and say something like ‘this Sesshoumaru has no need for anything from a human,’ or at best to simply ignore him. Instead the daiyoukai seemed to consider his words carefully. Then, after an almost imperceptible nod, he resumed his departure, leaving Miroku to stare after him with his mouth slightly agape. Once the monk thought about it, however, he decided that Sesshoumaru’s reaction made sense. It would not be too much longer before Rin began to come of age, after all, something not even the powerful daiyoukai was equipped to deal with. Perhaps Sesshoumaru was already considering Kaede’s village as a possible home for his ward. Not that he and Sango would have refused Rin at any rate, but if her guardian wanted to regard her care as repayment of the debt they owed, then that was fine with Miroku.

Shaking his head, he turned back to his companions to find Sango gently attempting to rouse her brother. She was clearly somewhat concerned that he did not stir, but her visage also reflected genuine happiness. Miroku wasn’t too worried; Kohaku would wake when he was ready. Perhaps he simply wasn’t mentally prepared to face the world yet. Miroku had started to make his way back to his fiancée’s side when a crimson blur flashed in front of him, stopping him in his tracks. He turned his head just in time to catch a clear glimpse of Inuyasha, with a young woman riding on his back trailing a full head of raven hair. Then the hanyou leapt over a building, and the pair was gone.

"Did I hit my head too hard and dream that?" Sango asked as he approached. Miroku could only shake his head in confusion.

"We should follow them," Shippou declared, and no one disagreed. Miroku could think of only one situation where it would be best for them _not_ to follow, that one being that Kagome had somehow regained her freedom and she and Inuyasha were running off to make passionate love. But that scenario was extremely farfetched, for a multitude of reasons. More likely, Hakago still remained in control and the reason for the pair’s haste was less romantic than it was sinister. And if that was the case, then Inuyasha’s already at times suspect judgment would be even less prudent than usual.

"Are you up for it, Kirara?" Sango asked her companion, who ‘mewed’ her assent and transformed. She favored her rear leg where the youkai had bitten her, but was obviously willing to carry them, at least under such urgent circumstances. If the journey proved to be a lengthy one, they would have to reconsider. As much as they needed to follow their friends, they would not jeopardize Kirara’s health to do it.

Without further delay, the group mounted up, Miroku sitting behind Sango and supporting Kohaku’s unconscious form between them. Together, they soared into the sky, in hot pursuit of the one victory which would make this momentous day compete.

* * *

Inuyasha sighed miserably as he gazed across the battlefield. Miroku and Sango were praying over Kohaku’s corpse, while Sesshoumaru stood off to the side by himself. Inuyasha was mildly surprised that his half-brother hadn’t picked a fight with him yet; he’d vowed to leave Naraku alone, after all. The daiyoukai couldn’t really fault him for defending Kagome, but then he’d gone and destroyed Naraku with the miko’s help. _That_ Sesshoumaru could take issue with, though the counterargument would be that the dark hanyou had been invincible without Hakago’s intervention, and Sesshoumaru certainly could have joined in that final massive confrontation if he’d so desired. But the daiyoukai had completely forgotten about Naraku once Rin’s life was placed in danger. Even now, he held the traumatized girl against his chest, uncaring if a few of her tears seeped into his clothing. Inuyasha could only shake his head. _And yet he’ll still say that humans are beneath him…what a jackass._ But the uncompromising idiocy of his elder sibling constituted the least of the hanyou’s concerns at the moment.

He was stalling, he knew. Hakago still gazed at him expectantly, waiting for an answer to his proposal. The little urchin was apparently tired of inhabiting the form of a frail human girl, and desired a replacement body. This had the potential to work out very well for all parties involved, particularly the hanyou and his beloved miko. The trouble was the identity of the person Hakago had chosen to serve as his next host—this portion of the agreement churned Inuyasha’s stomach and left a sour taste in his mouth. _How can I do that to her, after everything we’ve been through? We used to be enemies, but now I consider her a friend. How can I force her to surrender herself to this parasite?_

"Well, Inuyasha?" Kagome asked, her voice soft and pleading. Inuyasha almost gave in then and there, but shook his head violently to regain his senses.

"I can’t do it. We’ll find you somebody else." _Somebody as sadistic and rotten as you are. Somebody the world will be better off without._

"I’ve already told you, that is not an option. I have made my choice. And Kagome does not have time. She is fading, even as we speak. Every moment you waste makes it less likely that Kagome’s mind and spirit will be able to return, once I leave this body."

Inuyasha clenched his jaw, understanding the situation perfectly. But what Hakago was asking him to do went against every fiber of his being, everything he stood for, all of the traits which he valued in himself. It was those traits which made him believe that he was even the slightest bit worthy of Kagome’s love. If he did this, if he became the monster he would need to be in order to go through with it, then he was nothing.

"I thought…I thought you would do anything for me, Inuyasha. Was I wrong?"

That voice, desolate and broken, stabbed straight through Inuyasha’s heart. He glanced at her face, those solemn, beautiful eyes, and all of his carefully constructed resolve crumbled around him. Deep in some corner of his mind, he was aware that this was just a ploy perpetrated by Hakago to bend him to his will. But he no longer possessed the moral fortitude to refuse, not when it seemed as though Kagome herself was begging him to save her. Kagome was running out of time, and he would do anything for her.

Anything.

* * *

A cool breeze blew gently through Kagura’s hair as she knelt in the sun-kissed meadow, her body casting a long shadow as the sun set behind her. She gazed down at the ground, covered by grass and flowers, and the still-visible indentation where a body had recently rested. No trace of that person remained. Kagura had hoped that her sister would be still clinging to life when she arrived, but no such luck. Kanna was gone. She had died here in this field, alone and afraid.

Kagura clenched her hands into fists and bit her lip as she blinked back tears. She, Kanna, and Rin had been on their way to Naraku’s castle, when shortly before reaching their destination, Kanna had asked to be left in this field. Evidently, she hadn’t wished to participate in the battle against their mutual master, and Kagura had respected her decision. _Kanna…I told you to wait for me and promised that I would come back for you. But in the end, I couldn’t save you. I’m so, so sorry._

The wind lessened, swirling around her almost soothingly. Kanna’s face swam before her mind’s eye, and she might have considered the girl’s peaceful expression a product of her own imagination if a foreign presence had not also caused the heavy burden upon her heart to lighten. Kagura closed her eyes, a few rogue tears escaping to slide down her cheeks, her lips curling upward in a sad smile. _So you were at peace, in the end. I’m glad, but I…I wish I could have repaid what you did for me. Thank you._ Kagura choked back a sob as her sister smiled at her, the expression not seeming foreign in the slightest despite her having never worn it before. In death, she had found the freedom which had never been afforded to her during life. She was truly at peace.

Kagura remained there for some time, mourning in silence and remembering some of the times she and her sister had spent together. It struck her how little interaction they’d enjoyed, mostly due to Kanna’s personality. But they had been sisters in the truest sense, possessing the same tainted blood, and serving the same depraved sire. Kagura had taken comfort in that fact; no matter how badly Naraku treated her, she had never truly been alone. She owed Kanna so much more than her life. As long as she lived, her sister would always hold a special place in her heart. She would never forget her.

A sudden presence behind her caused Kagura to glance over her shoulder, to find unexpected company. The cold look in his eyes sent a shiver down her spine.

"Inuyasha, what—"

He moved suddenly, too quickly for her to react. Perhaps in the past, when his appearance would have immediately set her on edge, she might have been able to escape him. But not now, with her guard lowered due to their recent partnership. A level of trust she was beginning to regret. She cried out as he tackled her to the ground, swiftly knocking her fan from her grasp and pinning her arms behind her. Before she knew what was happening, he had stood her upright and was half-carrying, half-marching her back toward the tree line.

"Inuyasha, what the hell are you doing? Let me go!"

He made no reply, which frightened her as much as his odd behavior. Inuyasha was not a quiet person; their back-and-forth banter had been part of the reason why they hadn’t torn each other’s throats out during their long stay in the youkai graveyard. That he would not even offer an insult or a word of explanation meant that something was seriously wrong. His aura was dark and foreboding, as though he had buried everything which made him the good person he was. All that remained was ice, cold and lifeless.

"Inuyasha! Let me—"

"Shut up!" he snarled, the venom in his tone stilling her tongue as he drew them to a stop at the edge of the meadow. His voice revealed anger, frustration, and great inner turmoil. Kagura opened her mouth to ask what was the matter, but a figure stepped into view from behind a large tree, causing her to swallow her question with a frightened gasp. Dread settled in her stomach as she observed the familiar cruel smirk splayed across those lips, and suddenly she had a sinking feeling that she knew the reason for Inuyasha’s behavior.

"Why all the fuss, Kagura?" Hakago asked in Kagome’s voice, as though he honestly couldn’t comprehend the reason for her struggles. Kagura redoubled her efforts, but Inuyasha held her firmly.

"Inuyasha, please!"

"You must have seen this coming, Kagura," Kagome told her. "Did you honestly believe that I saved you from Naraku out of the goodness of my heart? Foolish woman. I did it because I had already chosen you as my next body. You are strong, mobile, and the people who might otherwise kill me do not wish you harm. And your heart…you try to hide it, but there is darkness there. I have sensed it. Delicious," she finished, licking her lips.

Kagura went ballistic, thrashing violently enough to test even Inuyasha’s strength. She screamed, alternating between curses and indecipherable cries. The hanyou desperately wanted to pin his ears back against his skull, but he kept them upright, forcing himself to listen to every terrified exclamation. His teeth ground together audibly, tears pooling in his own eyes though he kept them trained on the unwavering malicious smile distorting Kagome’s features. He would not allow his mind to wander or to pretend this wasn’t happening. If he was going to help Naraku’s offspring essentially rape Kagura’s mind, then he could at least give her his undivided attention. She deserved nothing less.

Eventually something snapped inside Kagura, and she ceased her struggles. Her body and head slumped forward, and she hung limply in his hold, weeping bitterly.

"P-please, Inuyasha…I just got my freedom. You can’t _do_ this to me!"

"Give it up, Kagura," Kagome said, stalking closer. "It will be easier on you if you don’t fight me." Then she raised her hand, reaching for Kagura’s cheek. The wind sorceress shied away instinctively, her voice now shaking with terror. But there was nowhere to go, as Kagome’s hand moved ever closer.

"N-no, please…stay away…please, no…no…NO!!!"

"DAMMIT!!!"

Kagura found herself suddenly thrown to the side, and was barely able to move her hands in front of her to soften the landing. She spun around to regard her captors, eyes wide with fear and hope. Kagome’s arm was still outstretched, but she dropped it to the side while glaring at Inuyasha in annoyance. The hanyou stared at the ground, his face clenched in uncertainty, blood dripping from his clenched fists where his claws had punctured his palms.

"Get out of here," he growled, voice barely above a whisper. Without another moment of hesitation, Kagura pulled out her feather and took to the air, swooping down only to gather her discarded fan. Then she soared off into the sky without looking back, her rapid, fear-fueled heartbeat driving her to speeds reached only once before, in another world not so long ago.

It would be well after dusk before she finally stopped running.

* * *

"Inuyasha," Hakago snarled angrily in his own voice, "that was _not_ part of our agreement."

Inuyasha sank to his knees, leaning forward on his hands in case his roiling stomach decided to evacuate its contents. He knew he had done the right thing, but he took no pride in it. Instead, he felt only despair. He had condemned Kagome to death.

The odds of him finding a suitable host who was also agreeable to Hakago, _before_ what was left of Kagome faded from this world, were slim to none. He had known this before releasing Kagura, and had still done it. He didn’t know whether he was a hero or a fool. Probably a little of both. His own conscience had not been enough to sway him from his chosen course, however. It had been Kagome, the thought of how she would react upon learning what he’d done, and who he’d sacrificed in order to save her. She would be ashamed, and a part of her would never forgive him. For Kagome would rather die than cause harm to an innocent, especially a friend. And if he let Hakago steal Kagura’s body, then Kagome would feel great guilt, as though she’d restrained the wind sorceress herself. In her mind, her hands would be just as dirty as his own. He couldn’t do that to her. Kagome obviously desired to be saved, and for their child to be saved. But she would not do _anything_ to make it so; she would not become a monster. And therefore, neither could Inuyasha.

"Look at me, you fool!" Hakago demanded, and Inuyasha complied, raising tired eyes to gaze upon the form of his beloved. His golden orbs widened as he noticed the figures in the background, then he ducked his head in renewed shame. That Miroku, Sango, Shippou, and Kirara had witnessed what he’d almost done made him want to crawl into a hole and die. It was several moments before he mustered the courage to look at them again, but what he saw both amazed and humbled him. They understood. Though clearly horrified by what they had seen, they understood the stress he’d been under, the magnitude of the temptation he’d had to overcome. They still respected him, and would continue to support him, whatever he chose to do.

_Whatever I choose to do…_

He frowned as an idea occurred to him. Hakago wanted a strong, mobile body to replace Kagome’s, and Inuyasha could no longer stomach the thought of an innocent person becoming his victim. There was, however, a solution which might satisfy both parties.

"Use me," he muttered, before he could question his sanity.

"What?"

"I said, use me," Inuyasha declared, more firmly this time. He rose to his feet, his aura surging with determination rather than despair. "Take _my_ body, you bastard." Hakago regarded him thoughtfully, but Inuyasha felt driven to make his case. "You want somebody who’s strong? I grew up in a world where every youkai I met wanted to kill me. And I wasted them all. _I_ killed Naraku. _I_ slayed Ryuukotsusei. _I_ took my fucking brother’s arm. You won’t find anyone stronger in this entire fucking country.

"You want somebody who’s mobile? I can run all day and all night without breaking a sweat. I can breathe pure miasma and come out laughing. The blood of the Inu-no-Taisho runs in my veins!" he exclaimed, thumping his chest. "You can look for the rest of your miserable life, and you’ll never find a body better than mine."

Hakago studied him, not revealing his thoughts for several moments. Inuyasha knew he’d overstated things, but hoped his pitch had the desired effect. Finally, Kagome’s lips curled up into an amused smirk, and the hanyou knew he’d succeeded.

"I know what you’re thinking," Hakago observed. "You believe that there is no darkness in your heart, nothing for me to latch onto. You’re confident that you’ll beat me, and that I’ll be reduced to a helpless infant again. I’ll admit that it is a bit of a risk, but as you say, the reward is worth it. Very well, Inuyasha, I accept your challenge. Everyone has darkness in their hearts. It is only a matter of time before I find yours."

Inuyasha didn’t deny Hakago’s first assertion. It was true; he did have faith in the purity of his heart. Kagome would be free, and they could raise a family together. He had come to a resolution concerning his relationship with Kikyou. What room was there for darkness in his heart?

"Inuyasha."

Shippou’s voice drew the hanyou’s attention to his friends, observing the scene solemnly from the sidelines. The kit’s voice trembled, but in his gaze Inuyasha saw acceptance and pride, the same emotions which were reflected back at him from his other friends. He nodded to Miroku and Sango in turn, then knelt by Shippou’s side and ruffled his hair. The kit’s tiny hands clutched his fingers fiercely.

"Make sure you come back," Shippou told him, to which Inuyasha nodded, favoring him with a confident grin. After briefly petting Kirara, he stood and regarded his friends one last time.

"You guys…I don’t know what to say," he began, voice thick with emotion. "It’s been an honor," he declared, bowing deeply, a formal gesture which was immediately belied by his next words. "If this goes to shit, I need you to promise me something. Make Kagome put the baby first. Promise me that you won’t let her come after me." Satisfied at their acceptance of that condition, Inuyasha smiled and closed his eyes, tilting his head up to the sky. There was just one more thing he needed to say.

"And tell Kagome…that I choose her."

He turned at last to his opponent, ignoring the shocked gasps behind him. His friends knew him well enough to understand what he really meant. And Kagome would as well.

But that was a worst-case scenario. If he proved victorious here, he would tell Kagome how he felt in person, in words which did justice to the depths of his love, if such a thing was possible. Regardless, he vowed to show her, every day until death did them part. Inuyasha’s heart swelled, and he knew, without a doubt, that no darkness existed within him. Only light, only love.

He strode up to his waiting opponent and embraced Kagome tightly, inhaling the scent of her hair once more. His lips quirked into a smile as her hand rose to caress his cheek, sending him plummeting into oblivion.


	34. Inuyasha's Heart

Inuyasha floated in a dull, featureless world, drifting on some imaginary plane of consciousness. It was peaceful, except for the disturbing sensation of an unknown foreign entity rooting around inside his chest. He felt that this should mean something to him, but couldn’t quite unravel the tangled threads of his memory just yet. He shrugged, feeling oddly relaxed despite the bizarre situation. He couldn’t comprehend the source of his mysterious confidence, but was comforted by it nonetheless. Everything was as it should be.

An image materialized before him, one he recognized immediately. _Okaa-san…_ She looked exactly as he remembered, standing before him with her arms spread, facing down the mob which clamored for his death. She was prepared to give her life for him, and on that terrible day, fate had finally called upon her to make that sacrifice.

He’d been playing by himself at the outskirts of the village, partly to escape the oppressive confines of his grandfather’s castle, and partly because the world of trees and wildlife beyond the settlement was the only one which truly accepted him. His mother encouraged him to explore, to learn something new about himself each day. Still, within her loving embrace was his favorite place to be. Her arms were the only home he’d ever known. Before his own foolishness had caused them to be torn away, forever.

It was an accident. He’d been pushing his limits, trying to leap over a storage hut in a single bound, quite a feat for a young hanyou. If he pulled it off he knew his mother would be proud of him, even if the rest of the humans called him a freak. But he’d tripped over an unfortunately placed rock and tumbled head first into the wall of the hut. Later he would wish that his head wasn’t so hard; it would have been better if his skull had broken rather than the wood. The villagers certainly didn’t care that he was just a clumsy hanyou kid who didn’t know his own strength. Especially not when a rogue youkai had recently been tearing up their fields and smashing storage huts at night, all of which they naturally blamed on the ‘youkai’ in their midst, despite an utter lack of evidence to support that assertion. The damaged hut, the only destruction Inuyasha had actually caused, proved to be the breaking point. When he went into the village to tell them what he’d done, because his mother had taught him to take responsibility for his actions, the men had surrounded him and backed him up against a wall, wielding swords and spears and calling for his blood. He’d been too frightened to do anything more than cower and cry. His attackers were unmoved.

They would have killed him on the spot had his mother not intervened. She pushed her way through the crowd, placing herself between her son and his attackers. He still remembered the sound of her voice, so strong and authoritative, an attempt to remind everyone who she was. But the villagers were too incensed to be dissuaded by a disgraced hime, despite her fancy clothing and regal bearing. One man tried to shove her aside, and she grabbed his spear, attempting to wrench it away from him. He flung her to the ground, and when she would not stay down, he swung the weapon downward in a great arc. The sharp crack of her collarbone breaking was clearly audible to Inuyasha’s hanyou ears. She cried out in pain, but still refused to stand aside. A few brutal kicks to her midsection ended the struggle. His mother lay on her side, gasping for breath, the sickening scent of her blood filling the air. In just a few moments, Inuyasha’s world had changed forever.

A murmur went up in the crowd, and they began to disperse. Some were horrified by what one of their own had done, while others feared reprisal by their liege lord. When Inuyasha’s grandfather and his entourage arrived some time later, however, the old man only gazed down at his daughter with a hard expression. Some lingering element of fatherly love drove him to have her carried back to his castle. To Inuyasha he spoke only a few words, without looking at him. _"Leave, boy. If you ever return here, I will kill you."_ Then they left him there, staring at the spot where his mother had fallen, watching as her blood seeped slowly into the hard-packed earth.

That night he snuck into the castle, ignoring his grandfather’s orders. He overheard his mother’s doctors giving their lord the bad news—his mother had been made comfortable, but nothing could be done. Several of her ribs had broken and punctured one or both of her lungs. _"Let her die, then,"_ was his grandfather’s cold response, which chilled Inuyasha to the bone even as he tried to tell himself that it wasn’t true. Those denials ceased as soon as he entered his mother’s chambers. She could barely breathe, and even then, her exhales brought up dark blood each time. His mother was dying.

Even so, she smiled when she saw him. It was the same smile she’d always worn, the one which showed him that he was loved, despite what everyone else in the world said. That she loved him still, even after what he’d done, set Inuyasha’s lip to trembling and brought forth tears from the very center of his being. He ran to her then and embraced her—too tightly, in retrospect, but she hugged him back without complaint, whispering soothing words against his hair. He tried to apologize—for being such a burden, for ruining her life by being born a hanyou, and for inadvertently killing her—but she would hear none of it. In the end, her greatest pleasure was simply knowing that he was alive. He still remembered her final words, thick with emotion and broken by the struggles of her damaged lungs.

"Inuyasha, my son…I am sorry that I must leave you…so young. You must…fend for yourself now. Leave this castle…seek your own place in the world. It will not be easy, but…I know you will make me proud, my son. You…have your father’s heart. Never forget my love. Carry it with you…always."

She drifted into unconsciousness shortly thereafter, and passed away during the night. Inuyasha remained by her side throughout, weeping bitterly against her body until her doctors came in to check on her. He rounded on them, fangs bared, the desire to kill rising within him for the first time. But his mother’s parting words echoed through his mind, soothing his grief-fueled rage. Instead, he turned his unnatural strength upon the wall, punching a hole large enough for him to squeeze through and make his escape.

Inuyasha had never returned to the castle. He’d remained in the area only long enough to ensure that his mother received a proper funeral. Her family buried her in an unmarked forest grave, a piece of their history they would like to forget. Inuyasha fashioned a simple marker of his own, and returned to pay his respects regularly as he grew up. Over the years, his visits had become less frequent due to his wide wanderings and other responsibilities, but he continued to carry his mother’s love with him. In some of his darkest moments, it was the only thing which kept him going.

Inuyasha blinked, then reached up to wipe the tears from his face. For once, he didn’t berate himself for crying. The tears reminded him of his mother’s words so long ago, and of her wisdom. _You were right, Okaa-san, I do have my father’s heart._ Recent relationship developments had made that even more abundantly clear. Despite his mistakes and shortcomings, he knew both of his parents would be proud of the man he’d become.

Full clarity at last returned to Inuyasha’s mind, and he recalled what he was doing in this strange world, reliving old memories. _Hakago is searching for the darkness in my heart. I must be seeing what he’s seeing._ But the perverse infant would discover no darkness here. Initially, he’d been heartbroken over causing his mother’s death. But she had never blamed him for it, and her final words had eventually enabled him to move on. He had made peace with his mother’s death long ago, warmed by her undying love and devotion. Hakago’s questing tendrils would find no purchase here.

"Give it up, you bastard," Inuyasha called into the abyss. "You can’t beat me."

"Kukuku," the infant laughed, his confidence in no way diminished by his initial defeat. "I am just getting started."

The next target area for Hakago’s search came as no surprise to Inuyasha. But here too, there was no darkness to exploit. Perhaps as little as a couple months ago, the reminder of his role in the tragedy which had befallen Kikyou fifty years ago might have broken him. But he had recently made peace with that as well, after the battle in the youkai graveyard. He finally knew what Kikyou was to him, what she was not, and what he owed her. He could sense Hakago’s surprise and dismay at the failure of his second attempt; Kagome’s memories must have convinced him that Kikyou was a great weakness of his. She still was to some extent, but not in a way which the infant could exploit. Slightly less confident than before, Hakago moved on.

The next collection of memories the infant showed him were difficult to bear, bringing to vivid life all of the times he had hurt Kagome. His chest clenched in dismay each time his former self broke her heart. The occasions after the conception of their child were the most poignant. Finally Hakago asked him how he thought he was worthy of Kagome, since all he had caused her was pain. Again, his revelations in the youkai graveyard provided the answer.

He wasn’t worthy of her. Based on his past actions, he didn’t even come close to deserving Kagome. But that wasn’t the point. Somehow, against all rhyme or reason, Kagome loved him. And love didn’t have to make logical sense. All he wanted was a chance to prove that he loved her just as deeply. He had been a fool, and had indeed caused her indescribable pain, but she would forgive him. And he would never hurt her like that again. If she would have him, he would be a better man, and would give her everything she had ever wanted and more. He would give her his heart, as she had already given hers to him. He would heal her wounded soul, as she had already healed his. They would join their lives, sharing their bodies and hearts, and live together for the rest of their days. Against such a promised future, there was no room for darkness.

There was, however, room for suffering, as Inuyasha was loath to admit. The next visions which Hakago showed him were not memories, but products of his imagination. It was almost like daydreaming, though what he saw was the stuff of nightmares. Kagome walked through the regional marketplace a couple villages over from Kaede’s, trying to maintain her composure as threats and insults rained down upon her, as well as small stones. ‘Tainted miko!’ ‘Youkai’s whore!’ Finally someone threw a larger stone which caught her square in the temple, sending her sprawling to the dirt. The villagers laughed as she struggled to stand, some kicking dirt or spitting on her as they passed.

Next he saw her lying on the side of some country road, curled in on herself as a couple men kicked her and beat her with clubs. By the time they finally left her, she was barely able to move. She could only lie there, physically broken, and hope that a friend happened upon her. The final vision was of a solitary hut, the door barred from the outside, and surrounded by a mob of angry villagers wielding weapons and torches. Some of the men set fire to the structure, which aided by a favorable wind quickly grew into a towering inferno. Nothing could be heard aside from the sounds of burning wood and the villagers’ shouts of encouragement, but it did not take a genius to figure out who was trapped inside the conflagration.

Abruptly the visions ceased, and Inuyasha recovered from his state of shock to the sounds of his own heavy breathing. His imaginary body was tense as a board, his claws digging deeply into his palms from how hard he’d clenched his fists, though this was inside his own mind so he did not bleed. He did, however, feel the pain, and the despair which Hakago had obviously intended to instill.

"Are you so selfish, Inuyasha? Will you condemn Kagome to a life of ridicule and hate? She would be better off if she had never met you."

A new vision passed before Inuyasha’s eyes, this one even more horrible than any of the others. It was something which the hanyou had secretly feared for some time now—the sight of his transformed self standing over Kagome’s lifeless corpse, his vicious claws covered in her blood. Lying underneath her, as if she had been trying to shield it from his wrath, was the body of a small child. Inuyasha could just make out a tiny canine ear from his vantage point. A baleful snarl escaped him then, and he swiped blindly out in front of him, as if to ward off the cursed images. They faded away, only to be replaced once more by Hakago’s voice, driving the knife deeper into his heart.

"Surrender to me, Inuyasha. Then Kagome can go back to her own time. She will be safe there, from the bigotry and hate of this world…and from you."

Doubt assailed Inuyasha, weighing him down and suppressing his defenses. The darkness which he had been successfully holding at bay began to creep in, taking advantage of his weakness. But he somehow found the strength within himself to resist, to stop his descent before he crossed the point of no return. He couldn’t explain why, but Hakago was wrong. This entire situation was _wrong_. And so he pushed aside his rampant emotions, and as painful as it was, he forced himself to reflect upon what he had seen. He turned first to the vision freshest in his mind, and the one which had nearly sent him plummeting into a fatal spiral of self-loathing. Killing Kagome and their child…such a thing was unspeakable, yet because of his heritage he was forced to confront the possibility. Ever since his first transformation against Goshinki, there had existed a dangerous chance that he would become a monster and turn his claws against his friends. But in any of those situations, had he actually done so? Had he not voluntarily reversed his last three transformations?

The answers to these questions were encouraging. Now that he had managed to overcome his initial knee-jerk reaction, he saw the truth. He was clearly not a mindless animal anymore when transformed, if he had ever been. Even after slaying Goshinki, he’d warned Kagome to stay away from him. A mindless animal would have slaughtered her without hesitation. And his level of control over his youkai side had certainly improved since then. He couldn’t imagine that he would fail to recognize his friends as ‘pack’ if he ever transformed in their presence again. And if that was the case, then would he not also recognize Kagome as his mate, and his children as his offspring? Beyond the logic or his own memories, Inuyasha felt the answer, deep in his soul. Even in his full-youkai state, he would never hurt the people he loved.

He approached the other images in the same manner. The sight of Kagome being hurt boiled his blood, as it always had. It forced him to wonder…was he being selfish? Would being with him ruin her life? The murkiness of these answers seemed to cast a shadow upon Inuyasha’s artificial world. For he knew that no matter how careful he was, no matter how diligently he watched over her, he could never guarantee her absolute safety. He could never completely shelter her from the hostile world around her. This life he intended to ask her to live with him…could kill her.

_"I’m with you by choice."_

The memory of those words raised his fragile spirits. Kagome had made this message abundantly clear to him many times since they’d first met, both with words and actions, but never had she spoken it so plainly as that day. Slumped against his back, physically and mentally exhausted from struggling against Tsubaki’s curse, she’d assured him that he had nothing to apologize for, that she was with him because she wanted to be. She would never know how much those words meant to him at the time, how they’d eased his guilty conscience. The memory brought a tentative smile to his face. _Kagome…_ He had never forced her to stay. He had only truly asked her to stay once, after that terrible encounter with Kikyou a few months ago. Still, she remained by his side, because that was her heart’s desire. _Because…she loves me._ And was love not worth the risk?

Sending her back to her own time would be safer, of that there was no doubt. But even in the modern world, her well-being was far from assured. No matter where she chose to live, danger lurked, both anticipated and unexpected. If a perfect utopia existed in some place or time, humanity certainly hadn’t found it yet. And if he chose to send her back, both he and Kagome would be miserable. Happiness and safety did not have to be mutually exclusive. Kagome had survived everything they’d been through so far. As long as she was by his side, his protectiveness of her would never waver. It was true that he could not shelter her absolutely, but there was much they could do to minimize the risks. Kagome was not stupid; she had grown much in her understanding of the dangers of this world, human and otherwise. What knowledge she lacked, he would share with her. He would tell her how his mother died, and plead with her never to let her guard down. He would tell her which settlements to avoid, and what to look for should she ever find herself beyond his protection. And she would undoubtedly remind him that there were good people in this world, people who accepted them, and people who would tolerate their relationship. Many of whom resided in Kaede’s village, where Inuyasha hoped to make their home. There would be reluctance and even hostility at first, but the inhabitants respected the opinion of their elderly miko, who had never shown any aversion to the two of them being together. Once the villagers saw that Kagome could still serve as a miko even after bearing a hanyou’s child, they would eventually come around.

Ultimately, it came down to this—Kagome wanted to stay, and he could not justify taking the decision away from her. The risk to her health increased if she remained by his side, but life was not about eliminating all risk. Life was about living. Kagome had taught him that. And neither of them could truly live without the other. No matter where or when they chose to live, as long as they were together, they would be home. It was as simple as that.

Inuyasha could have considered his unborn child as well, who would surely need a father even more than most children did. The young quarter-youkai would grow up in an unwelcoming world, the majority of which was still not ready to accept his kind. He would need to be taught how to handle adversity, how to manage his strength, and how to live as someone who carried parts of both the youkai and human worlds within him, yet was truly part of neither. Perhaps that would change someday. Every day spent with Kagome and his friends made Inuyasha feel less like an outcast. He truly was part of their world. It gave him hope that his children could find the same level of love and acceptance. Ultimately, however, Inuyasha didn’t spare these issues more than a passing thought. He already possessed all the conviction he needed.

"So Kagome would be better off if she’d never met me, eh?" he snarled, golden eyes ablaze with passion. "You’re wrong. Kagome was _born_ to meet me!"

He let his emotions take over at that point, as his youkai power flared to life around him. This was it. He had taken Hakago’s best shot, and remained unbroken. Now it was his turn. He gritted his teeth, growling with the effort as he summoned forth more and more of his willpower, pressing outward on this mental prison. Within moments, the artificial world surrounding him began to waver, distorting as some image on a fantastic television screen. Then it began to flicker, affording Inuyasha a series of glimpses through his own eyes again. He saw his friends, all watching him intently. Shippou appeared to be shouting, cheering with his fist raised, but the sound was muted. Glancing down, he saw Kagome lying unconscious at his feet, the gentle rise and fall of her chest a balm to his soul. He was almost there. So close, to where he was born to be.

Another image swam before his eyes, this one faded as though merely showing it to him had brought Hakago to the brink of his endurance. Inuyasha could sense his enemy’s desperation, but the sight sent shock rippling through his body. His momentum abated and finally fizzled altogether, as his sudden stupor drew him to a standstill. Its author no longer pushed to the brink, the image solidified, immersing Inuyasha fully within this new world, which the hanyou instinctively identified as a memory. A memory he had never seen before.

She lay beneath him on the futon, her raven locks fanned haphazardly around her. Her bare breasts heaved with her breathing, covered in a fine sheen of sweat. Her breath came in shallow pants, passing through lips bruised from rough treatment. Her cheeks were flushed, but her expression was not one of embarrassment. Her scent coiled around him, sadness and despair tinged with hints of arousal. Her eyes matched her scent perfectly, tearful and pleading. She shifted slightly, making Inuyasha aware of his own position. He leaned over her, as naked as she was, supporting his upper body with hands braced against the futon on either side of her head. Her right hand was clutched in his left, the hold awkward and undoubtedly uncomfortable for her as he pinned it to the futon. He knelt between her parted legs, his hardness pressed against her thigh, leaving no doubt as to what he had been about to do before something stopped him. Perhaps it had been Kagome’s left hand grasping his bicep, her fingernails digging into the muscle.

_"Please, Inuyasha, don’t…"_

Her voice trailed off then, and she bit her lower lip. For a second which seemed to stretch for a small eternity, Inuyasha watched her in oppressive, dreadful silence, the three words she had spoken reverberating through his mind. Then abruptly the memory cut out, returning him to Hakago’s artificial world. He floated there unblinking, unfeeling, the image of Kagome lying beneath him seared into his consciousness.

"Now you know the truth about that night, Inuyasha," the infant observed, his voice dripping with false sympathy. "And why you blacked it out. You were right, Inuyasha. In the following days, when you feared this…you were right."

Inuyasha gasped, shaking his head and refusing to believe his enemy’s words. But his own memory defeated him, the lingering image of Kagome’s heartbroken eyes and desperate tone sapping his strength. He really _had_ feared this, had he not? He seemed to recall Miroku and Kagome herself assuring him that it was not the case, but he could no longer remember their words, or why they had convinced him that he was not, _could_ not be a rapist bastard. Because in reality, every insult thrown his way, every time someone had judged him based on his appearance alone, they had been right. He was the monster most people assumed him to be.

Too late Inuyasha realized he was sinking, the light fading above him as blackness rose up on all sides. Too late he remembered the needs of the child in Kagome’s womb, and his beloved’s own feelings. And by the time he considered the possibility, even a miniscule one, that things were not exactly as they appeared, there was no time left to fight. He struggled feebly for a moment, but the darkness weighed him down, now too powerful to be defeated by force of will alone. _Kagome…I’m so sorry,_ was his final thought before his consciousness faded to black.

* * *

Miroku eyed his friend carefully, stepping cautiously closer. Inuyasha’s head was down, his bangs concealing his face from view. Up until a few moments ago, the hanyou’s aura had been rising, swelling with power as they watched with bated breath and cheered him on. Then the evolving balance of power shifted dramatically; Inuyasha’s youki rapidly subsided, overshadowed by a vaguely familiar, sinister aura. Things had stabilized now, but that foreign youki remained. Miroku thought he knew what this meant, but hoped he was wrong.

"Inuyasha?"

The hanyou’s head snapped up at the sound of his voice, golden eyes boring into Miroku’s for a fraction of a second. But that was all the time the monk needed to realize that those bright orbs no longer belonged to the man whom he had come to know as a close friend and loyal ally. Inuyasha was gone.

Miroku had prepared himself for this. His reflexes were on high alert, and he’d felt that he was ready for anything. But the suddenness and speed of Inuyasha’s movements caught him off guard, and the monk could no more defend himself from the blur of silver and crimson than he could turn back time and prevent all of this from happening. But then, he supposed that the ability to redo things was a common wish for people to make as their death loomed before them. He heard Sango’s scream as Inuyasha barreled into him, grabbing him by the shoulders and driving him to the ground. That surprised Miroku in and of itself, the fact that Hakago hadn’t simply sliced him in half where he stood. But he knew that it was only a momentary reprieve. His eyes had slammed shut when the back of his head struck the earth, and he kept them closed as he waited for the final blow to come.

Nothing happened. Miroku sensed Inuyasha’s presence above him, but the hanyou was not moving. He did hear rustling off to the side, undoubtedly Sango preparing herself for combat. But she did not dare to move any closer, likely fearing that such an action would bring about a bloody end to this unexpected stalemate.

"Inu—Hakago!" she snapped, sensing what Miroku had also realized. "Let. Him. Go!" she snarled, emphasizing every syllable.

"Tch," Inuyasha snorted, a sound which held irritation rather than amusement, as Miroku might have anticipated. Finally the monk could ignore his curiosity no longer, and he opened his eyes. He was not surprised find himself literally under Inuyasha’s claws, the five glistening points on the hanyou’s right hand poised to slice open his throat at any moment. But Hakago made no move to strike, and in fact his new hand shook with some unknown strain, his teeth gritted with the effort. Understanding dawned on the monk at the same time his assailant swore under his breath, withdrawing as quickly as he’d attacked.

"Kagome-chan!" Sango cried, drawing Miroku’s attention. She started to throw hiraikotsu, then stopped herself. Following her gaze, the monk saw why. Inuyasha was crouched over Kagome’s prone form; Sango obviously hadn’t wanted to risk accidentally hitting the miko, especially if she shared his suspicion about why he was still alive right now. As they watched, the hanyou flung open Kagome’s robes and snatched up a small item as if he knew exactly where it was. _The Shikon no Tama! He must have picked it up off the battlefield while still in Kagome-sama’s body!_ Finally, Hakago stood, glaring down at Kagome with fierce murderous intent. But he made no move to harm her, confirming what Miroku already suspected. At last, he spun and darted off into the nearby forest, quickly vanishing through the trees.

Miroku looked at Sango, finding that she had already come to the same decision as he, and that she was equally torn. Two undesirable options were laid out before them, but one central question held the key to the answer—which friend did they give priority to? Kagome or Inuyasha? Although, it wasn’t truly that simple. Kagome was lying unconscious right in front of them; they could definitely take care of her easily enough. Inuyasha, on the other hand, was currently racing away from them at hanyou speed. Taking into account other factors such as Kirara’s wounded leg and their utter lack of any sort of plan to free him from Hakago’s influence, chasing after the hanyou seemed like a losing proposition. Perhaps they weren’t in any danger from Inuyasha’s claws, but they also could do nothing to help him.

Miroku supposed there was a third option, namely splitting up the group. Either he or Sango could stay behind to watch over Kagome, or one of them could even take her along on Kirara in the hopes that she woke up. The miko might be able to fight against Hakago with her spiritual abilities. But right now she was dead to the world, and no one knew when, or even if, she would wake. Besides, neither of the ‘third options’ he’d just imagined involved a high level of care for Kagome herself. She had just spent weeks in captivity, being possessed by an incarnation of the most evil creature who had ever walked the Earth. Inuyasha believed that her physical body and the infant growing inside of it where fine, but how could they be sure? At the very least, the ordeal warranted an examination by a physician, preferably one from her own time who practiced advanced modern medicine.

Finally, Miroku sighed miserably, the knowledge that he’d made the right decision still not making it any easier to stomach. The memory of Inuyasha’s own words did, however, lighten his conscience somewhat. _We did promise him, did we not? That we would make Kagome-sama put the baby first, and not let her go after him._ And while the hanyou hadn’t demanded it of them in so many words, Miroku had no doubt what his friend had truly meant—to take care of Kagome and the baby, even if it meant leaving him to fend for himself inside a body he no longer owned. As much as he hated it, Miroku knew he had to abide by Inuyasha’s wishes, both because it was by far the most pragmatic thing to do, and because it was the right thing to do.

The sound of quiet footfalls drew his attention to Sango, who was striding purposefully over toward Kagome. The miko still lay in the same position Hakago had left her in, her robes in disarray. Miroku averted his eyes respectfully as Sango rearranged her clothing. Then he shuffled over to join the women, picking up Shippou along the way, who appeared to be in shock. Miroku patted his head, understanding the kit’s feelings perfectly.

"How is she?" he asked, the first words anyone had spoken since Inuyasha’s departure.

"She seems fine," Sango replied, her tone heavy with sadness and worry. "At least physically…"

Comprehending her meaning, Miroku handed Shippou to his fiancée and settled into a meditative sitting position. Once he felt that his spirit was as calm as this fucked up situation would allow, he breathed deeply and extended his hands over Kagome’s form. They hovered there, not touching her, as he used his own spiritual training to search for any trace of her, the woman who had become like a sister to him. Time stretched on with agonizing slowness as he delved deeper, peeling back the layers of Kagome’s soul. Finally, he slumped in relief, managing a small smile as he met the concerned gazes of his companions.

"She is alive," he declared, which caused Sango to mirror his reaction and some of the life to return to Shippou’s eyes. "I do not know how long it will take for her to wake, but now that Hakago is gone, she should make a full recovery."

What he didn’t tell them was how weak Kagome’s aura was, though it appeared that Sango saw right through him. Miroku thought he understood the reason for the miko’s peril. For weeks, Hakago had been unable to utilize her spiritual energy. Then, just a short while ago, he had summoned the full force of her miko power and used it to purify the Shikon no Tama and destroy Naraku. Kagome’s rapidly waning aura probably had everything to do with this sudden change. _No wonder Inuyasha was almost willing to sacrifice Kagura. Kagome-sama must have seen us in danger during the battle, and surrendered to Hakago so he could use her power to save us. She must have known it would kill her, but that didn’t stop her._ His admiration for the young woman raised to new heights, Miroku could only be grateful that they had managed to avert her intended sacrifice. Unfortunately, she would wake to an incomplete world, one in which the man she loved had been torn from her side. Knowing Kagome, she would be driven to do something about that. Honoring the promise he and Sango had made to Inuyasha was not going to be easy. It was something they needed to discuss, and soon.

Miroku cleared his throat to draw his companions’ attention. "I believe we all know what has happened here today," he said, meeting each of their gazes in turn to confirm. Shippou still seemed fairly out of it; he was busy watching Kagome intently.

"And what we must do going forward," Sango replied solemnly, grimacing as her thoughts drifted in the same direction. "Honoring our promise to Inuyasha is not going to be easy, is it?"

Miroku grinned inwardly. _We already think alike under pressure. Pretty soon we’ll be finishing each other’s sentences._ But his amusement did not reach his face, and it dissipated quickly.

"No, I fear not, Sango. And for this reason, I feel that—Shippou?" he called, tapping the kit to get his attention. The young fox who was at times not the best at keeping secrets needed to hear this. Satisfied that Shippou was focusing on him, Miroku steeled his resolve and spoke the words which weighed heavily upon his heart.

"We must not tell Kagome-sama what Inuyasha said, about choosing her."

He got the reaction he expected from Shippou—wide eyes, and a demand to know why. Sango simply closed her eyes, wiping a tear from her cheek. Miroku felt for her; since the beginning of their journey together, Sango and Kagome had shared much with each other, more than anyone else in the group by far. They had become each other’s closest friends. This deception, this lie, was going to hurt Sango more than anyone, except Kagome herself. But it was a necessary evil, and he was glad the taijiya agreed with him. Now, if he could just persuade the young fox…

"Shippou, do you want Kagome-sama’s baby to be born healthy?"

"O-Of course I do!"

"Do you also remember the promise we made to Inuyasha?"

Shippou frowned. "Yeah, b-but—"

"I know it is difficult, Shippou. You want to go after Inuyasha, and so do Sango and I. You can bet that Kagome-sama will as well. But Inuyasha knew what he was talking about. We cannot let a woman in the advanced stages of pregnancy go traipsing around in the wilderness searching for a hanyou who does not wish to be found. Inuyasha asked us to ‘make Kagome put the baby first.’ If we tell Kagome-sama what he said, it will be even more difficult to persuade her to do what is best for her, and for the baby."

Shippou remained silent, biting his lip as he tried to come up with a way around Miroku’s logic. But the monk could tell when he gave up, as tears began to flow down his cheeks.

"I don’t understand!" he wailed. "That jerk Inuyasha! How could he have lost?!"

Miroku could only shake his head, as Sango hugged Shippou and comforted him as best she could. A glance told him that she was just as puzzled by that question as he was. Inuyasha had finally realized how he felt about Kagome. And he must surely have known, or at least strongly suspected, how she felt about him. So how had Hakago managed to corrupt his heart? What darkness had been left to find?

"I wish I knew, Shippou. I wish I knew."

* * *

_I’m…I’m moving._

It was a pleasant motion, steady and repetitive. It was almost like walking, but her legs were lifted out in front of her and bent at the knees, so that was impossible. Her sleep-addled brain felt like it was slogging through mud, and her eyes were strangely heavy. But she felt safe, and remained relaxed as awareness gradually returned to her mind. Eventually, she realized that she was being carried.

Immediately her thoughts turned to Inuyasha, her lips quirking up in a lazy smile as she drifted in that enchanted land between sleep and wakefulness, where happy memories frolic and harsh reality merely lurks in the distance, blissfully out of sight. Kagome was in no hurry to leave that place, instinctively knowing that the waking world would be less sweet.

"Are you all right, Houshi-sama?"

A jolt surged through Kagome’s mind at the sound of that voice, nearby and familiar. Another more powerful one passed through her system as the body underneath her answered the question, in a voice which most definitely did _not_ belong to Inuyasha. Though Kagome was relieved to note that this other voice also seemed familiar.

"I’m fine, Sango."

"Are you sure? Kirara can take over."

"Well, let me carry her for a little while longer. Then perhaps Kirara can take her until we are ready to stop for the night. Is that agreeable, Kirara?"

*Mew*

Kagome’s brow furrowed. She had recognized all of those voices, even the feline’s vocalization. But none of them belonged to Inuyasha, whom her idyllic subconscious wanderings had led her to expect. The hands supporting her thighs were not tipped with sharp claws which nevertheless instilled absolutely no fear in her. The back supporting her was strong, but its contours were not correct, nor did the fabric pressed against her cheek conjure images of vivid red and feelings of warmth and safety. She was being carried by a friend, but not Inuyasha. This more than anything else finally encouraged Kagome to struggle out of the dream world in which she had been hovering. She lifted her head and squinted her eyes open, wondering if the sunlight was really as blinding as it appeared, or if it was just her.

"Kagome!"

That surprised, high-pitched scream directly beside her ear caused the bewildered miko to duck her head against her bearer’s back with a miserable groan. Other words followed, from all of the familiar-but-not-Inuyasha voices, but the ringing in her ears allowed Kagome to tune them out. Eventually they went silent, but only when the throbbing in her temples decreased to a tolerable level did Kagome dare to lift her head once more. As she met their gazes for the first time, the sense of familiarity increased. She _must_ know these friendly-looking people, but for the life of her, she couldn’t place their names or how she knew them.

"Kagome, are you okay?" the little kitsune boy asked from his perch atop the man’s shoulder, much quieter this time. Kagome blinked at him, unsure how to respond.

"Let’s set her down," the woman said, and the man released his grip on her thigh, allowing her leg to straighten. She grabbed his shoulders and held on instinctively, but then the woman was behind her, supporting her, whispering soothing words in her ear. But Kagome only tightened her grip on the fabric under her hands and shook her head, eyes wide with sudden terror. The other woman remained calm, however, ever so slowly disentangling the frightened miko’s fingers and lowering her shaking form to the ground. Then she leaned her back against something incredibly soft, something that moved. Kagome recoiled in fear as she noticed the bright red eyes of the massive feline whom she was currently resting against. This monster had been a kitten just a moment ago! But her impression of familiarity did not fade. It was so strange, the sensation of knowing these people, yet not knowing them. And where was Inuyasha? She was so confused. She shook harder, curling in on herself, keening sounds forming in the back of her throat. It was all becoming too much. The world around her began to fade, and she willingly drifted toward blissful unconsciousness. At least there, she could find Inuyasha.

"What’s wrong with her?" Shippou demanded, his voice high with panic.

"Relax, Shippou," Sango replied, the worry in her tone belying her words. "She’s just in shock. Kagome-chan?"

_"Kagome-chan?"_

_"Kagome-chan!"_

She felt hands grab her own, stalling her descent into oblivion. Warm hands, but not Inuyasha’s. Despite that fact, she experienced a certain degree of comfort. These were hands she had trusted in the past, hands which had never let her down. She could trust them again. Hesitantly she reversed course, gradually floating up towards the waking world once more. When she broke the surface, she opened her eyes, finding the woman with the trustworthy hands kneeling before her with an expression of relief mixed with concern. She was saying something, so with effort Kagome focused on the moving lips and willed her ears to capture the speech.

"—me-chan? Kagome-chan? Are you all right? Can you hear me?"

Kagome didn’t recall telling her body to nod, but her point of vision moved up and down a few times, and the woman broke out in a relieved smile.

"Thank the Kami. Okay, Kagome-chan. Just relax," she said, enunciating every word slowly and clearly. "Why don’t you rest until you get your bearings? No one needs to talk to you until you’re ready. But we’re your friends, and we want to be here for you. Is it okay if we stay?"

Kagome was torn. On the one hand, she wished these confusing people would leave her alone. But the greater part of her was moved by the woman’s heartfelt plea, and feared the prospect of solitude. Inuyasha wasn’t here. Who knew what evil lurked just off the roadway, behind every bush and tree trunk, biding its time until she became completely helpless? These people, on the other hand, were familiar to her and seemed to care for her well-being. Despite her reservations, it was not a difficult decision for even the disoriented miko to make.

At her timid nod, her companions smiled happily and left her to relax in peace, as promised. The man and woman sat conversing in hushed voices a short distance away; what words Kagome could make out indicated that they were talking about her. The miko found that she didn’t really mind. Clearly, there _was_ something wrong with her. Amnesia was certainly not a normal occurrence, though it would hopefully be a temporary one. Kagome didn’t know what her old life was like, but it must surely be better than sitting here with nothing but a giant void where her past should be. If anything, the threads of memory she had been able to piece together only confused her more. Sensing her anxiety, the fire-cat currently serving as her backrest nuzzled her hand gently, its soothing rumble passing to Kagome through their contact. Still nervous, but no longer fearful of the benevolent beast, the miko hesitantly reached up and stroked the luxurious fur, starting at its neck but eventually moving up to its head at the feline’s encouragement.

A small smile tugged on the corners of Kagome’s lips, her first since her distressing realization that Inuyasha was not here. She wanted to know where he was, but wasn’t sure she was ready to know the answer. Her friends had told her to rest, and that was probably the best thing for her. Leaning further into her furry cushion, she turned her gaze up to the sky, sighing as a good portion of the tension gradually drained from her being. Her attempts to shut her mind off were not entirely successful, but she managed to avoid stressing too much about her lost memory. If it was meant to come back, it would. And if not, she would make a new life, and live for the future.

Eventually, the combination of her recovering eyes and the darkening of the sky overhead meant that she no longer had to squint. Before she realized, several hours had passed and the sun was setting on the western horizon. The conversation around her had long since ceased; the silence which reigned was not comfortable, nor was it oppressive. Perhaps expectant or anticipatory would be good adjectives to describe it. Her friends were waiting for her, she knew, and finally Kagome felt calm enough to raise her head and interact with the group. She glanced at each of them in turn, still drawing a blank on their names, though the feeling of familiarity had only grown during her period of quiet mediation. For the first time she noticed the human boy sitting by himself at the edge of the tree line. But he ignored her and seemed only vaguely familiar, so she moved on quickly. Finally her gaze settled on the young kitsune child, sitting morosely by himself in front of her. He looked absolutely miserable, and Kagome’s heart went out to him. He had obviously expected her to remember him, to be her old self again when she woke up. She didn’t know the reason behind her current disappointing situation, but she determined to try to remember, for his sake. She hated seeing a child so sad.

Her brow furrowing with the effort, she delved into the chaotic mess that was her mind, searching for that one particular piece of information which might make the little boy smile. Her vision swam briefly, but she pushed through it and the dizziness faded. Still his name eluded her, which made no sense. Of all her companions, his identity should be the most obvious. Kagome was sure she knew many men and women, and probably multiple cats as well. But she found it hard to believe that there was anyone in her life like this tiny kitsune child with beautiful emerald eyes and an adorable tail. There was only one…only one…

"Shi— Shi— Shippou-chan!" she declared at last, experiencing a quiet sense of accomplishment. Those bright green eyes went wide as saucers, and the young kitsune leapt to his feet and raced over to her, his tail practically wagging with excitement.

"You remember me, Kagome?!" he shouted, and when Kagome nodded, his grin spread to encompass nearly his entire face. The miko grunted as he slammed into her chest, clinging to her clothing for all he was worth. Far from minding the display of affection, she hugged him back, glad that his tears were now born of happiness rather than misery. Then she turned to the man and woman, currently gazing at her with guarded hope in their eyes. Evidently reaching within herself to discover one name had made the others easier to find, because within half a minute the woman’s name was on the tip of her tongue.

"S-Sango-chan."

Sango slumped in relief, and Kagome belatedly realized that the monk sitting next to the taijiya had used her name in conversation when they thought she was still asleep. The first thing which came to mind when she looked to him, however, was not his name or even the title which Sango customarily used.

"Hentai," she mumbled without really thinking about it, immediately blushing as she realized what nonsense had just been excreted from her mouth. She hurried to apologize but Sango’s soft snickering gave her pause. If the taijiya thought it was funny…could it be true? The monk just sighed dramatically and muttered something about being ‘misunderstood.’ Kagome frowned. If the monk really was a hentai, and had been carrying her so intimately… Fortunately, Sango seemed to understand her suddenly alarmed expression.

"Don’t worry, Kagome-chan. I kept an eye on him while he was carrying you. I watched him like a hawk," the taijiya told her with a wink. The monk sighed again, even louder than before. Comforted by Sango’s reassurances, it did not take long for Kagome to come up with the monk’s actual name, or that of the feline at her back. The collective mood was jovial for a few blissful moments. But there was still one person missing, and finally Kagome felt confident enough to ask the question which had been on her mind ever since first waking up.

"Inuyasha. Where is Inuyasha?"

All conversation stopped at her query, an intense silence falling over the group. The atmosphere became heavy, and suddenly no one could meet her gaze. They clearly did not want to tell her what had happened to the person she had never ceased to identify as the man she loved.

"Where is Inuyasha?!" she demanded again, real fear coloring her tone this time. She swayed lightly as dizziness returned, a consequence of her accelerating heartbeat. Seeing this, and likely fearing another fainting spell, Sango spoke up.

"Relax, Kagome-chan! Inuyasha is f-fine. He’s alive."

Kagome was obviously glad to hear this, but her worried heart latched onto Sango’s tiny stutter of the word ‘fine,’ and her tone which suggested that while she was telling the truth, it was not the whole truth.

"Where is he?" she asked again, still very concerned though no longer hovering on the verge of panic. Sango grimaced and rubbed the back of her neck, the picture of a woman charged with bearing bad news and unsure how to give it. Kagome waited impatiently for her friend to find her words.

"Do you remember anything about what has happened over the last few months, Kagome-chan?" When Kagome only frowned at the question and shook her head, Sango sighed in resignation. "Do you remember…Hakago?"

Kagome gasped. It was true that her memories of the past were hidden from her, but _that_ name she did remember. Immediately, strong sensations of revulsion and anger welled up inside her. She recalled feeling despair and profound helplessness, all in connection with that particular name. _That’s right…I was controlled by Hakago._ She didn’t know how, when, or for what purpose, but the truth of that assertion was unassailable. She really _had_ been controlled by Hakago. And now…what? Seeing her reaction, Sango finally provided the answer she was seeking.

"Inuyasha freed you from Hakago…by taking your place."

For a moment, Kagome only stared at the other girl in shock, unable or unwilling to accept those words. It seemed too far-fetched. Her strong, indomitable hanyou had lost? Her sweet, beautiful Inuyasha was now under the control of the same monster who had possessed her? Frantically she searched Sango’s face for any sign of untruth, but found only sadness and sympathy. That was when Kagome knew it was true. Her bottom lip trembled, and she curled in on herself as the fragile dam on her emotions began to give way. And when she felt Sango’s arms encircle her, she threw herself into her friend’s embrace and wept bitterly.

It was late that evening before an exhausted Kagome finally cried herself to sleep.


	35. Responsibility

Kagome trudged along at the rear of the group, the gentle warmth of the mid-afternoon sun doing little to raise her spirits. It had been about two days since she’d first awakened, and her friends had told her that she’d been unconscious for another two before that. A total of four days had passed since the final battle against Naraku and the terrible aftermath. Four days, since her already upside-down world was thrown completely out of alignment.

She’d been fairly out of it for most of yesterday, only recovering memories in bits and pieces. She’d gone to bed still knowing very little about the people around her, or why things were the way they were. This morning, her miko power had made itself known to her for the first time. Soon after, she’d sensed the youki signature of the child growing inside her, and remembered that she was pregnant. Then the floodgates had opened.

She hadn’t even been able to walk for a good chunk of the morning, assailed as she was by the rapid return of her fragmented mind. Memory after memory slammed into her consciousness, causing her head to throb as she struggled to cope with it all. After the storm raging within her skull finally subsided, she was truly Kagome again. Each and every memory had not returned; there were still dark spots in places which had never been blacked out before. But she had continued to recover pieces of her past over the ensuing several hours, at a much more manageable pace. She had no doubt that pattern would continue.

As for the reason behind this strange turn of events, the working theory was that her mind had become disconnected from her body, and to a lesser extent her soul, when she surrendered herself to Hakago so he could use her miko power. Inuyasha had rescued her from Hakago’s influence in the nick of time—by all rights she should be a vegetable right now—but it had still taken a long time for her mind to reintegrate with the rest of her. The rapid recovery of the past six hours had been spurred by the acknowledgement of her miko abilities; her spiritual power had accelerated the process of putting herself back together, healing her in ways which no medical care could hope to match. Otherwise, her friends believed, it would have taken her much longer to regain her memory, if she would have been able to make a full recovery at all.

They had encouraged her to look on the bright side—the death of Naraku and the health of her and her baby being the highlights. But she was having none of that. _"Inuyasha freed you from Hakago…by taking your place."_ Obviously his sacrifice was not intentional, but it was one he’d been willing to make if necessary. Right now, he was probably stuck living in the same state of perpetual unconsciousness that she had experienced, punctuated by brief moments of awareness when Hakago lost focus or tried to do something repugnant. Initially, Kagome had feared that Inuyasha had fully surrendered himself and was already dead, for all intents and purposes. But, as her friends confirmed, none of them would still be breathing if that were the case. Inuyasha, the _true_ Inuyasha, had stopped his physical body from tearing them asunder. He was still alive.

Absently she wondered if this was how Inuyasha had felt after her own abduction. Helpless, not knowing how she was going to save him, but determined to track him down and free him no matter where she had to go or how long it took. Of course, their situations weren’t exactly the same; the darkness in her heart which allowed Hakago to overcome her resistance had in large part been Inuyasha’s fault, after all. On the contrary, Kagome had no idea what she might have done to cause an exploitable darkness to fester in Inuyasha’s own heart. Had she not always been generous with him? Had she ever made him choose between herself and Kikyou? Even though his conditional promise to stay with her didn’t make her happy, she had accepted it. So what could possibly have convinced him, even for a moment, that it was better for him to _die_ than to go on living?

Over the past several hours, Kagome had discovered that the possibilities were as numerous as they were disturbing. Yet, none of them really jumped out at her as more likely than the rest. Perhaps time would bring clarity. _Great. How long do I have to spend thinking about this before I go insane?_ She could already feel her mood sinking into some sort of miserable abyss. But who could blame her? Inuyasha obviously thought that there was something seriously wrong with their relationship, something unfixable. Hakago had managed to convince her for just a moment that Inuyasha didn’t care for her at all, thereby filling her heart with despair. If the reverse was true, Kagome knew that it would wound her deeply. Because even with all of the fighting, sadness, and hurt feelings they’d inflicted upon each other in the past, she had never given him reason to doubt her love.

Sighing, Kagome tried to turn her mind away from that line of thought. It really would drive her crazy if she kept thinking about it. The only way to know for sure was to free Inuyasha and ask him, which she fully intended to do. Even if he’d realized that he didn’t want to be with her at all, and instead desired to join Kikyou in hell immediately, he still didn’t deserve to be Hakago’s slave. Nobody deserved that fate, to sleep while one’s body aged and wasted away under the control of another. What would it be like, to wake up hundreds of years from now as an old man, as Hakago strolled away in a fancy new body? That assumed of course that the infant allowed his former hosts to carry on living at all; he certainly hadn’t intended it with her. If one thing showed that Inuyasha still cared for her on some level, it was that. Even if it was only as a friend, his desire to protect her had been strong enough to still his own claws, despite his abductor’s best efforts. How long that resistance would continue, Kagome couldn’t say. She had maintained her strength fairly well until voluntarily surrendering, but had definitely been on a slow decline. Inuyasha was powerful in his own right, but there was most certainly a time limit on saving him.

This had been her argument for turning around and going after him immediately, when she and her friends had discussed the matter after the bulk of her memories returned. They countered with sound, logical reasoning—they had no way to find Inuyasha, he had no desire to be found, and so on. What convinced Kagome to relent, however, was their genuine concern for the health of her baby. They were right; it would be irresponsible of her to not immediately proceed back through the bone eater’s well to see her doctor. The baby’s aura seemed fine, but there could be other problems, especially considering who she had lived with for the past several weeks.

Kagome’s acquiescence, however, was only temporary. As soon as she saw the doctor and assured her family that she was alive and well, she fully intended to return to the feudal era and hunt Hakago to the ends of the Earth if need be. She had a feeling that this was going to cause a major argument with her friends, but would cross that bridge when she came to it. They had been mum on the subject, and she was happy to put off the inevitable confrontation for another day. She sighed, her shoulders slumping even further. Yet another thing to feel miserable about.

An arm suddenly fell around her shoulders, and she turned to find that Sango had sidled up next to her, smiling encouragingly.

"Buck up, Kagome-chan. It’s not all bad."

"Yeah," Shippou agreed as he clambered up to her opposite shoulder. "Inuyasha will come back eventually. In the meantime, you’ve got us!"

"Indeed," Miroku added from directly in front of her. "And if you are feeling tired, Kagome-sama, I am happy to carry you again." He quirked an eyebrow at her, holding his hands down by his sides and making suggestive squeezing motions with his fingers.

Kagome couldn’t stop the grin which brightened her features, warmed as she was by her friends’ attempts to cheer her up. It wouldn’t work, not really, but she appreciated the effort.

"I’ll pass, Miroku-sama," she replied politely, shooting Sango a mischievous, sideways glance. "Though perhaps Sango-chan is feeling tired?"

The taijiya snorted. "In his dreams."

Kagome turned to gaze more fully at her friend. Sango’s cheeks had pinked just slightly, a barely noticeable blush. In the past, that comment would have made her angry or embarrassed, or more likely both. Now, she appeared to take it in stride. Kagome’s brow furrowed as she studied the other woman, whose eyes as she gazed at Miroku held only happiness and contentment. Something had definitely changed between the two of them, and it would be a wonderful distraction from Inuyasha for her to find out what it was. _Come to think of it, Sango-chan never did get to tell me what happened between them at Mount Hakurei…_

"You know, I could share a few more of my dreams with you, Sango. You might find them most…enlightening."

That comment did cause Sango to blush furiously, but the glare she sent Miroku’s way held no bite. Oh yes, something _major_ had changed between them. Kagome was glad to see it, and intensely curious about the details.

As luck—or perhaps careful planning—would have it, near dusk they arrived at a small hot spring which Miroku knew of from his travels. With Shippou promising to sound the alarm in case the monk tried to spy on them, a vow which Miroku declared unnecessary—likely because Sango’s own brother was with them—the excited women practically skipped to the spring to bathe. Sango had clearly been looking forward to this for a long time, and Kagome was thrilled to be on the receiving end of her friend’s desire to share. Sango’s news surpassed even her wildest imagination. She swore she squealed loud enough for Miroku to hear back at camp when the taijiya informed her of their engagement. And his dream while under the influence of Naraku’s poison was sweet enough to bring tears to her eyes. Jealousy sparked within her, but she squashed it down and stuffed it into a dark crevice deep in her mind. This night was for Sango, and despite her envy, Kagome was ridiculously happy for her.

Toward the end of the conversation, Shippou emerged from behind a bush and began to disrobe. When asked what he was doing here, he informed them that Kohaku had requested him to leave. Sango and Kagome shared a worried look at that. Kohaku hadn’t said much of anything, at least since Kagome woke up. That he now wanted to have a private conversation with Miroku might not bode well.

In the end, they needn’t have worried. Both males were un-maimed when the women returned to camp, and Miroku seemed to be in decent enough spirits. Kohaku had reverted to the silent brooding which had become customary for him, but even his expression was somewhat lighter than before. It gave Kagome hope that someday, the unfortunate boy who had suffered so much would make a full recovery as well. He hadn’t yet told anyone how or even if he wished to live, but the miko was optimistic that he would make the right choice in the end. With Sango’s love and support, Kohaku would heal. His was one life which Naraku would fail to destroy.

As for the other life currently hanging in the balance…only time would tell.

* * *

About a week later, Kagome found herself kneeling beside the bone eater’s well, leaning against the structure on her forearms and gazing down into its gloomy depths. The world at her back was bright and sunny, with nature going about its daily business, but Kagome felt only dread. She had been prepared to travel through the time portal immediately upon arriving here, but had stopped herself as one major complication made itself known. It had been Shippou who suddenly posed the question which had resulted in her current predicament, just as she was about to swing her legs over the side and drop into the starlit void.

_"Will you still be able to come back if you don’t have a Shikon fragment, Kagome?"_

That query had drawn the miko’s entire existence to a standstill. It was amazing, that such an obvious flaw in her plan could escape her notice. She had become so used to traveling back and forth between time periods; it was easy to forget the role the Shikon no Tama played in allowing said time travel to occur. She’d also had a lot on her mind, not the least of which was an overriding concern for the welfare of her unborn child. Miroku and Sango hadn’t thought of it either, so she wouldn’t be too hard on herself. She was just glad that Shippou had realized the danger before she accidentally did something disastrous. Kagome believed with all of her heart that she had a role to play in freeing Inuyasha from his captivity. If she could never return to the feudal era, it might prove an utter catastrophe, for both of them.

On the other hand, she couldn’t just conveniently ignore the reason why she had determined to go back to her own time in the first place. She would not feel safe until her child, who had just spent weeks inside the womb of someone who was for all intents and purposes Naraku’s servant, received a modern medical exam. No offense to Kaede, but an ultrasound would tell her more about her baby’s health than the old miko ever could. If the cost of this was being forever banished to the modern era, however, could she go through with it?

That was the million dollar question. She supposed that even if the well was sealed to her, it didn’t necessarily mean that she would never see Inuyasha again. He had always been able to travel through the time portal at will, regardless of the presence of the Shikon no Tama. Why that was, Kagome couldn’t begin to guess. What she did know was that the one time Inuyasha had sent her through the well without any jewel shards, she had been trapped in the modern era. She had only been able to return through a happy coincidence, when Shippou fell into the feudal era well with the Shikon fragment at the same time she was kneeling in the modern equivalent. Since something like that was unlikely to happen again, the only way she would ever return to the past if the portal sealed behind her was if Inuyasha came to retrieve her. This of course assumed that he could somehow free himself from Hakago without her help, a dicey proposition at best.

So what did she do? How on Earth was she supposed to make this decision? Ideally, the well would still let her pass freely and she would have her cake and eat it too. That would be the least fate or any other cosmic force of the universe could do for her, given all the crap they’d dumped upon her recently. But in her experience, life didn’t always work out that way. It would really help if she knew one way or the other whether the time portal was now a one-way street. Struck by sudden inspiration, she reflected that perhaps there was a way to gather some intelligence. Standing abruptly, she grabbed hold of the vines growing inside the structure and carefully swung one of her legs over the side.

"Kagome! You’re not going, are you?" Shippou asked with wide eyes as he noticed her movements. Her friends had been waiting here with her for the better part of ten minutes, lending silent support as she ran through things in her mind. Miroku, Sango, and Kirara also gazed at her in concern, each of them wondering the same thing.

Kagome smiled to reassure them. "Don’t worry, Shippou-chan. I’m just going to see what I can see." If she did decide to go through the well even knowing that it wouldn’t let her return, she would make sure she said a proper goodbye. For the moment, she kept that sentiment to herself, praying that such a thing would not be necessary.

Lowering herself into the well proved more difficult than pulling herself out, but she managed without incident. Finally she descended far enough to stick her foot out and tap the dirt at the bottom with her toe. When nothing happened, she dared to place first one foot, then both down, finally releasing the vines when it became clear that she was in no danger of suddenly falling through the portal. She could feel the magic of the structure, but it lay dormant, as though reacting to her unspoken desire to remain in this time. Kneeling, she ran her hands experimentally over the hard-packed earth. _Okay, Mr. Bone Eater’s Well, what secrets do you have to tell me?_

Grimacing as she realized how stupid that sounded, Kagome was glad she hadn’t posed the question out loud. Her friends were watching her anxiously from above, though making a fool of herself was the least of her concerns at the moment. Focusing her spiritual energy, she tried to reach out to the mystical entity which made the bone eater’s well more than just a manmade hole in the ground. _Please, give me a sign. Will I be able to return to this time if I go back to my homeland?_ In response, Kagome felt a deep, resounding pulse emanate from underneath her feet. Her brow furrowed, glad that her efforts to communicate were meeting with success, but unable to understand the significance of the message. Another pulse came, then another, but rather than comprehension, the only thing which dawned on Kagome was frustration.

She gasped suddenly, her hands flying to her midsection. Had she imagined it, the barely detectable pulse of her baby’s youki? Then it happened again, an almost unconscious response by the tiny life growing within her. The well’s rhythmic throbs changed in timbre to match, and soon the two of them were pulsing in unison. Finally, Kagome understood. _Our baby…he’s the only one of us who is truly connected to both worlds. That’s what the well is trying to tell me, that at least for now, our baby will be able to pass freely!_ And since he couldn’t go anywhere without her at the moment, that must mean that she could utilize the time portal at will. Would that remain the case once the baby was born? Kagome didn’t know, but that was most definitely a concern for another day. For now, it truly did appear that she could have her cake and eat it too. Perhaps fate had decided to thrown her a bone after all.

Grinning now, Kagome dropped her focus and relaxed. Immediately she felt the weightlessness of the time slip engulf her, until her feet settled on solid ground once again. When she repeated that action, she found herself back in the feudal era, gazing up at the semi-panicked faces of her friends.

"It’s okay, guys," she told them cheerfully. "Just an unexpected benefit of being pregnant. I’ll be back tonight to tell you what’s going on."

A couple minutes later, Kagome exited the well house on her side of the time slip, sighing happily as she gazed across the grounds at her childhood home. Despite everything going on in the other world, she was glad to be back. She couldn’t wait to see her family again.

"Tadaima!" she called softly as she stepped into the foyer. There was a flurry of activity, then her mother raced around the corner from the kitchen, nearly colliding with the opposite wall in her haste. Once she recovered her balance she froze, staring at her daughter with wide eyes which rapidly filled with tears. Moved by the display, Kagome struggled not to cry herself, a battle which she instinctively knew she would lose.

"Hi, Mama," she greeted with a brilliant smile. "I’m back."

"Kagome!" her mother cried, rushing forward to enfold her in a heartfelt embrace. Kagome hugged her back just as tightly, shedding a few tears to match the droplets streaming down her mother’s cheeks. At the sound of heavy footsteps, she looked up in time to see her brother and grandfather thumping down the stairs. Souta’s eyes misted up immediately and he ran to her, forgetting for a moment that it wasn’t cool for a preteen like him to hug his big sister for all he was worth. Her grandfather approached more slowly, attempting to adopt a stern, ‘where have you been all this time?’ old man face. But he couldn’t quite pull it off, and when Kagome freed her hand and extended it to him, her Jii-chan clutched it tightly, his lip quivering. Sighing, Kagome closed her eyes and basked in her family’s love. For a few blissful moments, nothing else in the world mattered.

Finally her mother pulled away. "Kagome, what happened? When you were gone for so long, and missed all of those prenatal appointments, we started to worry…"

"It’s okay, Mama. The baby and I are fine, really. We just…got a little sidetracked, is all."

"Where’s Inuyasha?" Souta interjected, not surprising Kagome in the slightest that he was the first to notice his idol’s absence. She grimaced, painfully aware that the happy reunion was over. Now came the unpleasant part.

"Let’s go into the kitchen. It’s a long story."

It actually didn’t take that long to tell the tale, in large part because she spun the abridged version. For example, she omitted just how close she’d come to rape and/or death at various points over the course of the journey. She also didn’t specify exactly how Hakago had taken control of her and Inuyasha’s bodies, merely stating that he had ‘possessed’ them with his dark powers. That was the hardest part, dealing with Souta’s shock and dismay. The kid still treated Inuyasha as a hero, who had _obviously_ played no part in his own abduction. Kagome had to bite her tongue to keep from bursting his bubble, but she contented herself with the knowledge that Souta only thought so highly of Inuyasha because he didn’t know any better. And it was going to stay that way, if she had anything to say about it. Her brother and grandfather didn’t need to know about the emotional intricacies of her relationship with the temperamental hanyou. She wasn’t even sure her mother needed to know.

Perhaps sensing her daughter’s discomfort, Mrs. Higurashi changed the subject. "Can I make you a prenatal appointment, dear?"

"Please, Mama."

"Okay. I had to tell the doctor you were gone, but she told me to call her right away if you returned."

"Gone?" Kagome repeated, suddenly worried. "Where did you tell her I was?"

Her mother smiled sheepishly. "Well, you see…don’t be mad, dear. I had to make up something on the spot. As far as the doctor knows…you eloped with Inuyasha."

Kagome barked a dry, humorless laugh at that. _Oh, if only that were true._ But alas, it was probably the biggest lie her mother had ever told. Not that Kagome blamed her; in fact, it was quite a clever deception. She would go into the doctor’s office with her tail between her legs, claiming that her boyfriend had dumped her and that she’d seen the error of her ways. _The doctor was a little judgmental, come to think of it, so I’m sure she’ll buy that story without a problem. Maybe if I cry a bit she’ll go easy on me._ That wouldn’t be too difficult under the circumstances.

Mrs. Higurashi went to make the call, leaving Kagome to suffer through a few minutes of Inuyasha-related questions from Souta. That was certainly not fun, but she slogged her way through it. Eventually even the youth sensed that his line of inquiry was making her uncomfortable, so he dropped it. The three of them sat in awkward silence until Mrs. Higurashi returned.

"Okay, so your appointment is next Wednesday at ten in the morning."

"Thanks, Mama. What day is today?"

"Thursday."

"Thursday!" Kagome exclaimed. "But that’s—"

Her mother frowned. "That was the earliest appointment she had, dear, and it was only available because she had a recent cancellation. We were lucky to get it."

Kagome groaned inwardly. _That’s almost a week away. I can’t delay the search for that long!_ But what choice did she have? Clearly, she hadn’t thought this through. Doctors didn’t normally have appointments on a couple days’ notice, which had been part of her brilliant plan. Then again, she had been fairly distracted lately. Her mother was right, at any rate; they were lucky to get an appointment within a week. She would just have to suck it up and wait. One of the main reasons she had come back here was so that her baby could have modern medical care, and she wasn’t going to let a few extra days’ delay deprive him of that.

"It’s fine, Mama," she replied, trying to purge the disappointment from her tone. "I’m really glad she could see me so soon."

"Okay, dear. Why don’t you go upstairs and take a hot bath, then rest until dinner? You look tired."

The thought of a hot bath brought a genuine smile to Kagome’s lips. "Thanks, Mama."

Truthfully, she was as tired as she looked. She hadn’t been sleeping well lately, courtesy of disturbing nightmares involving her lost hanyou. Sometimes she was never able to free him from Hakago, no matter what she tried. Other times he broke the infant’s hold, only to magically pull Kikyou from thin air and take her to hell with him. Once he even pulled her to the ground and began making out with her passionately on the grass. Fortunately, Kagome had only been forced to witness _that_ a single time. She hadn’t felt so nauseous since the morning after she drank her body weight in sake. Lying awake at night, unable or unwilling to sleep, she passed the time by stroking her child’s aura with her spiritual power, re-familiarizing herself with the tiny life growing inside her. It soothed her wounded heart, and allowed her to eventually drift off to more peaceful slumber. Still, she had been losing sleep each night and hoped that her soft mattress would help her catch up.

She nearly dozed off in the tub, and remained soaking until the water had cooled from wonderfully hot to lukewarm. She was tempted to empty the tub and run more water, but decided against it, lest she turn into a giant prune. It was a well-sated Kagome who shuffled across the hallway to her room a few minutes later. She was almost finished changing into a pair of sweatpants and a warm sweater when there came a knock on the door.

"Kagome? Can I come in?"

"Sure, Mama," the miko replied, somewhat bewildered by the request but seeing no reason to deny it. Her mother entered, grinned at her choice of mismatched attire, then strode over to the bed and sat down on it. She patted the sheets next to her, and Kagome took the hint. She observed with a sideways glance as her mother’s grin faded and her demeanor became serious. Curious and a little concerned now, Kagome waited for the other woman to speak.

"So," her mother began at last, "will you tell me the truth about how you and Inuyasha came to be possessed by this ‘Hakago’ person?"

"Mama?"

"I could see it on your face, Kagome. It wasn’t nearly as simple as you made it out to be. I understand why you didn’t want to say anything in front of your brother and grandfather, but I hope you know that you can confide in me."

"O-Of course, Mama," Kagome replied automatically, never doubting the truth of that statement for even a second. Her mother had always been there for her. Supportive without being intrusive, she had been a willing listener, but had never pushed her daughter’s boundaries or demanded information. Kagome sensed that if she did not feel forthcoming here, her mother would likewise let the issue drop. That, however, was not the case. Kagome didn’t know if confiding in her mother would help, but it certainly wouldn’t hurt. It might make her feel better, and her mother might be able to impart some wisdom to help her through the rough time ahead. More than anything, she didn’t want to see her mother attempt to cover her sadness if she refused.

"You’re right, Mama," she admitted with a regretful sigh. "Hakago…is only able to possess a person’s body if he can find darkness in their heart. You can guess what darkness he found in mine." Her mother nodded once in understanding, but did not interrupt. "He convinced me that Inuyasha didn’t care about me at all, and was just using me. I know that’s not true. Even if he’s never able to be with me as I want, Inuyasha does care about me. And when this child is born, I know he’ll love it with all of his heart. It’s just…with everything happening at the time, I…"

"You had a moment of weakness," her mother finished matter-of-factly, placing a hand on Kagome’s shoulder and smiling reassuringly. "Everyone has them, dear. I had them before I agreed to marry your father, and I’m sure he had them as well. It’s a natural part of life."

"Only most of the time, one moment of doubt doesn’t have such terrible consequences," Kagome observed bitterly.

"That is true," her mother acknowledged. "But then, your life doesn’t exactly fall under the heading ‘most of the time,’ does it?" Kagome snorted and shook her head. "Kagome, you’ve been through more in your young life than most people on this side of the well can even imagine, including me. Don’t feel bad for doubting yourself or Inuyasha. You came through this, and I’m sure he will as well."

"But Mama! I don’t even understand what darkness Inuyasha had in his heart!" Kagome exclaimed, sniffling and drying her suddenly moist eyes. Her mother grabbed her a tissue, then took to staring off into space as she considered her words carefully.

"I don’t know Inuyasha all that well," she admitted solemnly. "But ever since I first met him, I’ve seen how he carries something around with him, something heavy. It seems to have gotten lighter in the time he’s known you, but it still weighed on him the last time I saw him. When you told me about Kikyou, I realized that she was part of it. A big part. But it’s more than that. He carries uncertainty about many things—his past, his relationship with you, being a father. So to me, it isn’t all that surprising that he lost to Hakago."

"But how could he? What the hell kind of reason does he have to doubt _anything?!_ "

"I can’t tell you that, dear," Mrs. Higurashi replied calmly, ignoring her daughter’s outburst. "And I won’t tell you that you have to forgive him now. I only ask that you give him a chance to explain himself. And if you still love him when he returns…perhaps you will find it within yourself to forgive him then."

"Mama…"

Of all the things Kagome had expected her mother to say, that was not one of them. Though perhaps she shouldn’t have been surprised. Her mother was observant enough to see how she was obsessing about the darkness in Inuyasha’s heart. Perhaps she was also speaking from a position of some experience in such matters. In any case, her mother’s advice was essentially this: stop obsessing about Inuyasha’s failure. Worry about forgiving him when he returns, and not until then. It was obviously the best thing for her mental health, but it had taken hearing it from a person she trusted for her to truly embrace the philosophy. From now on, she would try to live by her mother’s advice. It would not be easy, but then nothing worth having was.

"Mama…thank you."

Mrs. Higurashi grinned brightly, enfolding her daughter in a warm embrace. "Think nothing of it, dear. I don’t like seeing you so sad." A comfortable silence settled over the two women for several moments, as Kagome’s tears dried up and her spirits lifted. Then Mrs. Higurashi broke the embrace, speaking slowly as if she was nervous about the answer to her question.

"So…what will you do now? I know you were upset about the doctor’s appointment being next week…"

Kagome grimaced, knowing this could be a contentious conversation. "I’m going back, Mama," she responded firmly. "I have to find Inuyasha."

Mrs. Higurashi sighed. "I figured as much."

"Mama? You’re not upset?"

"Of course I’m upset!" the older woman snapped, reminding Kagome of the discussion they’d had in the kitchen when she confessed her pregnancy. Her mother had been fierce but under control back then, and she was getting the same vibe from her now.

"You’re a grown woman, Kagome," Mrs. Higurashi continued after a moment, her tone slightly bitter. "As I said before, I can’t tell you what to do anymore. I will, however, _strongly_ suggest that you consider the well-being of your child. You can move around fine now, but believe me, when that third trimester comes around you won’t want any part of being on the road. It will get more dangerous for you and your baby to travel as your pregnancy progresses. I’m asking you to give yourself a time limit. If you haven’t found Inuyasha by say, for example, your twenty-eighth week, then promise yourself that you’ll come back and enter the next phase of your life. Just know that once you become a mother, there is no going back."

Kagome considered her mother’s words carefully. She had been planning to search for Inuyasha right up until it came time for her to deliver, but was that really feasible? Or was she being blinded by her desire to free him, to the detriment of her child’s health? Now that her mother had so clearly laid out the counterargument, she knew what position her conscience was going to take. Expecting to spend the rest of her pregnancy in the wild searching for Inuyasha was immature, and unrealistic. As painful as that realization was, she had a responsibility to her child which was more important than any she owed to Inuyasha. And now that she thought about it, Inuyasha would probably agree with her mother. He would surely protest her willingness to put her life and their child’s life in jeopardy for his sake. Unfortunately, she had no way to know for sure what Inuyasha would have wanted, but she knew him, and his likely opinion on the matter was clear to her.

Still, accepting this course of action was not easy, not when it involved tamping down the desires of her heart in favor of reason and responsibility. But her conscience was alleviated, and as she finally met her mother’s gaze, she knew she was doing the right thing.

"You’re right, Mama. I…I’ll make that promise to myself. And when the time comes…I’ll keep it."

Her mother smile sympathetically, understanding how difficult this was for her. "Thank you, Kagome. I’m proud of you." Then, as if every serious topic of conversation had been exhausted, she hopped to her feet and spun to face her daughter, her words bright and carefree.

"So what do you have planned for the next five days?"

"Um…nothing, I guess," Kagome replied, a little weirded out by her mother’s sudden shift in demeanor. Despite herself, however, she found her mood improved by the older woman’s exuberance.

"Why don’t you go to school, then?"

Kagome snorted, grinning wryly as she motioned to her growing belly. "I don’t think I can pull off my school uniform anymore, Mama."

"Oh, you’d be surprised," her mother replied, grabbing her hands and pulling her to her feet. Then she knelt down and lifted her sweater, studying her tank top clad stomach like an artist pondering over a blank canvas. "You’re not that big yet. A nice pair of long pants and a cardigan will cover that right up. I think there’s one in your closet that’s a little too big for you, which would be perfect!"

The next thing Kagome knew, her mother was rummaging around in her closet searching for said oversized article of clothing. She couldn’t fault the choice in garb—the pants would cover the fact that her waistline had expanded and lowered, and the cardigan would conceal her figure. But while it was a nice idea, there was one major problem.

"Mama, the school won’t let me attend class unless I wear my uni—"

"Aha!" her mother exclaimed, holding the cardigan up victoriously. Then she tossed the article on Kagome’s desk chair and dove back in, probably searching for the perfect pair of pants.

Kagome groaned. "Mama, are you even listening to me?"

"Oh, lighten up, Kagome," she replied, proving that indeed she was. "You let me worry about the school. They still think you’re sick, so I’m sure they’ll make an exception to the dress code. I may have to make a fuss, but that’s what mothers are for, ne?"

Kagome resisted the urge to smack herself in the forehead. "I can’t believe they’re still buying the bogus illnesses Jii-chan makes up."

"Well, who would doubt the word of the well-respected priest of an ancient shrine?" her mother asked, an edge of amusement to her tone.

Kagome giggled. "They clearly don’t know Jii-chan very well."

"That’s likely a good th—aha!" her mother exclaimed again, now holding up a pair of slacks Kagome hadn’t worn in over a year. Like the cardigan, they had also been slightly too big for her back then; perhaps the same misinformed relative had given her both items? However she acquired them, the clothes would prove useful in a way the giver never expected.

"Put these on, dear. I’m going to call the school."

Her mother breezed out of the room, leaving Kagome to sigh in exhaustion. She wasn’t even sure she wanted to go to school. What was the point? She obviously wasn’t going to graduate; in a month or two, baggy clothes would no longer hide her condition, and she was sure she’d have no interest in attending after the baby was born, even if it could be kept a secret from the school. The whole thing seemed like a waste of time. On the other hand, the alternative of sitting at home or in Kaede’s village for five days was dreadfully unappealing. At least attending class and studying at night and over the weekend would take her mind off of Inuyasha. It would give her something to do, other than twiddling her thumbs and torturing herself emotionally. It would give her a purpose in life, during this temporary limbo where her true purpose had been put on hold. _Plus, I’ll get to see Eri, Yuka, and Ayumi again. Who knows how many more times I’ll get to see them…_

Decision made, Kagome began to remove her clothes. Her mother found her standing in front of the mirror ten minutes later, studying herself with an appraising eye.

"See, I told you!" Mrs. Higurashi exclaimed happily as she glimpsed her daughter’s reflection. "No one will know the difference."

"So they’ll really let me go?"

"Yep! I told them you were constantly cold and couldn’t go anywhere without being properly bundled up. The principal made me promise that you would look ‘professional and presentable,’" her mother repeated, mimicking the principal’s gruff voice rather comically. "You have to go to his office when you first arrive for an ‘inspection,’ but if there are any problems just have him call me," she instructed with a dangerous wink. Kagome hoped for the principal’s sake that there were no issues.

Mrs. Higurashi knelt to inspect her daughter’s clothing more closely, muttering to herself how she would hem the bottom of the pants, perhaps put a comfortable elastic in the waistband, and so on. She stopped talking when Kagome squatted down and hugged her tightly, grateful beyond measure, for everything.

"You’re welcome, Kagome. Now, how would you like oden for dinner?"

"Yes! You’re the best, Mama!"

"I know, dear." She turned to leave, then paused briefly in the doorway. "Oh, and one more thing. I got you excused from gym class."

"Oh, good idea. I don’t want to fall."

"And I’m not sure you could pull off your gym outfit anymore, either."

"Mama!" Kagome exclaimed, listening as her mother chuckled all the way down the stairs. Playful teasing aside, however, she was incredibly pleased with how their conversation had gone. It had turned out to be one of their best mother-daughter moments. One thing was for sure—her child was incredibly lucky to have a grandmother like that. The only one more fortunate was her. And with such a role model to guide her, Kagome hoped that she would be a wonderful mother too, when she did fully embrace the next phase of her life.

* * *

Hakago listened to the little girl’s pitiful sobs as he stalked toward the exit of the hut. Her mother tried to console her, but truthfully she was just as shaken. And for good reason; he had come here with murderous intent, after all, only to be met with failure once again. Hakago let his annoyance bleed into his tone as he turned to fix them with one final glare, tinging Inuyasha’s voice with a savage, guttural quality.

"I’ll be back someday. The next time you see me, I’m going to slaughter you."

The intensity of the girl’s sobs as he walked into the night should have been music to his ears, the scent of her frightened tears the finest perfume. But Hakago found that he could enjoy neither, the specter of defeat casting a dark cloud upon his mood. Inuyasha was proving just as obstinate as Kagome had been. He seemed to have this inexplicable sixth sense; whenever Hakago was about to hurt someone, the hanyou awoke and exerted just enough control over his body to prevent the intended harm. Like Kagome before him, he had refused to surrender fully, and still clung to existence inside a physical form which no longer belonged to him. It was irritating as hell, especially since Hakago knew that strength of will alone would not allow a host to continue to resist him. Kagome had survived through her miko power, and Inuyasha was likely sustaining himself with a small portion of his youki. It was only the strength of said youki which saved him; a lesser hanyou would have perished completely by now.

But then again, a lesser hanyou was not desirable. Hakago held no love for half-breeds, but he could certainly appreciate the noble heritage of Inuyasha’s youkai half. It made this particular hanyou vastly more powerful than most of the full-youkai the infant had ever come across. It made him a worthy host for Hakago, heir to Naraku’s legacy and owner of the Shikon no Tama.

Grinning to himself, Hakago accelerated into a sprint and darted into a nearby forest, knowing that physical exertion would improve his disposition. He had only inhabited this body for a matter of days, but already he was falling in love with it. Inuyasha had not been exaggerating during his boastful little speech. The wind whipping through his hair, the ability to tear things apart with his claws at will—well, _some_ things—these were all experiences the former infant had never enjoyed before. He drew great pleasure from them now. He had spent the time since switching forms familiarizing himself with his new body, testing its limits and attempting to teach himself how to perform some of the skills which Inuyasha’s memory revealed him to be capable of. He could now pull off a fairly passable Sankon Tetsusou, though the Hijin Ketsusou still eluded him. But that would come with time, as he gradually became the true master of this magnificent body.

Clearly he was not there yet, however. He snarled at the reminder of his failure, slashing at a random tree and experiencing a perverse sense of satisfaction as the trunk practically exploded under his claws. _Now, if only I could do that to a person…_

He supposed his failure the other day was not all _that_ surprising. Inuyasha loved Kagome and his friends, though obviously not in the same way. That his resistance just moments after nearly ousting Hakago from his body was strong enough to spare their lives was understandable. But now, to wind up with the same result after a few days of exerting steady pressure on the hanyou’s mind, against a casual acquaintance no less? That was extremely disappointing. He had journeyed to the village where Shiori, the little bat-hanyou Inuyasha had met six months ago, resided in the hopes of breaking the inu-hanyou’s spirit and taking a huge step toward total supremacy over this form. Instead he had been rebuffed in the same way as before, and discovered that Inuyasha’s strength was not going to be so easy to overcome.

Was he going about this the wrong way? Perhaps instead of starting with the people Inuyasha loved and working his way down, he should start with beings the hanyou cared nothing for and work his way up. Based on what he had sensed, Inuyasha’s resistance corresponded to how strongly he desired to protect the intended victim. It was a phenomenon which the hanyou likely had no control over, but which might work to his captor’s advantage. He would not, after all, be able to stop Hakago from slaughtering some lesser youkai, would he? What about evil humans, despicable murderers, rapists, and thieves? Just where did the imaginary boundary lie between success and failure, between life and death?

Hakago smirked. There was only one way to find out.


	36. On the Road Again

Kagome took a deep breath, willing herself to relax. While she couldn’t say the situation was entirely normal, she had been waiting for this day for the better part of a week. In all likelihood, the doctor’s examination would reveal that the baby was fine. Still, now that the appointment was so close, she couldn’t shake the persistent doubt. Maybe something really had gone wrong…

Her mother’s hand comfortingly patting her leg broke her from her thoughts, and she turned to find the other woman smiling sympathetically at her. It reminded Kagome of not so long ago when the two of them had ridden the same train together to her first prenatal appointment. It seemed that just a couple weeks had passed since then, thanks in part to her lengthy period of captivity, but in reality it had been three or four months. Her mother’s support was one of the few things in her life which had not changed during that tumultuous time. Kagome reached for her hand and gripped it tightly, gratefully accepting the offered comfort. Moments like this reminded her that even with the rest of her world in constant flux, her mother was her rock, her anchor in stormy seas. When the waters calmed, she would still be there. That knowledge allowed Kagome to relax somewhat, as she leaned her head against her mother’s shoulder and turned her mind to other matters.

School had been…well, she would not lie to herself and pretend that she had enjoyed it. The principal had approved her choice of dress on Friday morning, though he made no effort to hide his displeasure at being forced to bend the rules by a nagging parent. Kagome supposed that if she really was sick, the classroom would have been quite comfortable for her. But since her illness was fake, being forced to sit there in long pants and a heavy sweater all day left her sweaty and lightheaded by the time the afternoon bell rang. Perhaps it was only her imagination, but it felt like the teacher had even turned the heat up slightly, in consideration of her ‘illness.’ If anything, her flushed and disheveled appearance probably lent credence to the lie.

But going to school had served its purpose, namely to distract her from spending too much time thinking about Inuyasha. And it had been nice to see her girlfriends again, for one last time. Once she had almost gathered up the courage to tell them about her pregnancy, but chickened out at the last second. She couldn’t be sure how they would react, and honestly, they were better off not knowing. Thus, the only interesting piece of news passed in either direction had been that of Hojo’s new romance. He had held out admirably in her friends’ opinions, but had eventually begun courting a girl who had taken a liking to him. After all, a highly eligible bachelor like Hojo could only wait so long for a girl to show up at school, right? To say nothing of the times she had stood him up on dates.

If her friends expected Kagome to be saddened by this development, they were disappointed. At least on the outside, she presented herself as happy for him and not the least bit upset, especially during the somewhat awkward conversation she’d had with Hojo himself. But internally, Kagome experienced mixed feelings about his new love interest. She felt quite hypocritical, being simultaneously relieved to not have to deal with his attentions, while also wishing that he was still pining hopelessly after her. Was that crazy? She didn’t honestly have any romantic interest in Hojo, but like Kouga, his obvious attraction to her had been a comfort during the dark days, when her relationship with Inuyasha left her feeling unwanted and unfulfilled. And now, like the wolf prince before him, Hojo was gone. All that remained was her, alone. Possibly forever.

Kagome shook her head to clear it. That was the kind of thinking which had allowed Hakago to corrupt her heart in the first place. She was _not_ alone. Even if Inuyasha never returned, she would live for her friends and family on both sides of the bone eater’s well, and for the child in her womb. And if someday she found love again, then so be it. Not that she expected such a thing to pass. She had given her heart to someone, and found it hard to believe that she would ever be able to take it back and give it someone else. If enjoying a second love was that easy, then perhaps Inuyasha would not have found it so difficult to move on from Kikyou. That of course assumed that the hanyou loved her, Kagome, at all, which she was obviously not confident enough to state unequivocally.

"Are you ready, dear?" her mother asked, preventing her from drifting too far down that dark road. She blinked open her eyes to find that the train had almost reached their stop.

"As ready as I’ll ever be, Mama," Kagome replied, grinning wryly. "I just have a feeling that I’m about to get a big lecture."

"Probably," her mother admitted. "But some of it will be information you actually need to hear, so just bear it, okay?" Kagome nodded, reflecting that this might be one of those times that she hated being right.

Indeed it was. Mrs. Higurashi was asked to wait in the lobby this time, and Kagome soon found out why. To put it lightly, the doctor was _not_ pleased that she had received no prenatal care during her ‘elopement.’ The fact that the child’s father was no longer in the picture seemed to lower her opinion of Kagome even further, though she did advise the teen to ‘sue his behind for child support’ as soon as the baby was born. Kagome wondered with some amusement what the judge would say if she mentioned that the father was a hanyou from five hundred years in the past, but wisely kept that observation to herself. Instead, she took her mother’s advice, and did her best to soak in the lecture without snapping back. She was painting a self-portrait here, of a downtrodden youth, recently dumped and struggling with the prospect of raising a child by herself. She didn’t claim to be much of an actress, but the doctor seemed to accept the ruse easily enough, perhaps because it was at least partially true. After a few minutes, her tone lowered and she turned her lecture topic to what Kagome should do in the future, rather than how she had screwed up her past. The top items on that list were eating healthier and coming to regular prenatal checkups from now on.

The first item Kagome would attempt to abide by, though healthy eating was not easy while traveling in the feudal era. Hopefully Miroku didn’t mind spending more of his travel funds—or performing more phony exorcisms—than usual. The prescription the doctor wrote her for a new, stronger type of prenatal vitamin would help make up for any lack of nutrition in her diet. In terms of the doctor’s other demand, however, Kagome knew she wasn’t going to be able to comply. She was not coming back here in a couple weeks; she intended to remain on the road until Inuyasha was free or the self-imposed time limit ran out on her quest. In addition, the risk of discovering an inhuman feature on the ultrasound would be too high later in her pregnancy. She was nervous about having the procedure done today even, but her concern for her child’s health outweighed that fear.

Again, Kagome hated being right. The technician performing the ultrasound furrowed her brow and stared closely at the screen for a few moments. Kagome had to practically beg to get her to confess what she had seen. Evidently, the technician had been unable to see the child’s ear, and had also noticed an ‘odd growth’ on its head. She didn’t seem too concerned, and told Kagome that they would follow up at her next visit. Evidently, it was not unusual at this stage to be unable to make out all of the features clearly. Other than that, everything appeared normal, which was the news the mother-to-be had so desperately been seeking.

Speaking of news, the technician had been able to determine the gender of the baby with a fair degree of certainty. Kagome hadn’t anticipated this information to be available so soon, and when asked if she wanted to know, she had no answer ready. If Inuyasha were here, she would be content to let him decide. But since he was not, there was nothing to stop Kagome’s curiosity from resolving the issue for her. She had been treating the child as a ‘him’ ever since first reading ‘his’ aura all those months ago, and she was suddenly dying to know whether she’d been right all this time.

As it turned out, she had indeed been correct, at least per the technician’s opinion. She was having a boy. _A son…with his father’s ears._ Kagome swore her heart skipped a beat at the thought. She left the doctor’s office in excellent spirits, rejoining her mother and taking the train home, stopping only once to fill the prescription and go to the grocery store. After a quiet lunch and a tearful goodbye, she once again dropped into the bone eater’s well and emerged into the feudal era.

Standing at the bottom of the structure and gazing up at the bright blue sky overhead, Kagome felt like a new woman. On her back she carried her yellow bag, packed with only the essentials—her sleeping roll, changes of clothing, some healthy meals, and her prenatal vitamins. Gone were the carefree days of study materials and _hanafuda_ cards; she had neither the time nor the inclination to partake in such distractions now. She wore a pair of thigh-length shorts and a long-sleeved maternity top, utilitarian clothing which would be tough and comfortable to travel in. The top was slightly too big for her, but she would grow into it soon enough.

She had told her friends approximately when she would be returning, so she was not surprised to find them waiting for her at the well. They were pleased to see her, but their faces also seemed pensive, as though there was an elephant in the room everyone was studiously ignoring. Kagome grinned inwardly, knowing what it was and also knowing that the pending conversation was not going to be nearly as contentious as her friends feared. After Miroku helped her climb out of the well, she seated herself on the lip of the structure and smiled reassuringly at them.

"Okay, guys. I want to go look for Inuyasha," she began, catching them off guard with her candor. "I know that you don’t necessarily approve of that choice, but I _have to go_. But…you aren’t wrong to be concerned." Her friends exchanged surprised looks at that. "I had a talk with my mother," Kagome admitted. "She was worried too. Given that all the people I trust agree, how can I not listen? So I won’t travel until it’s time for me to deliver. I promised my mother that I would set a time limit. If I don’t find Inuyasha by then, I’ll return here to stay.

"So I’m not asking you to come with me indefinitely. Just give me two new moons. After that, I’ll do what’s best for the baby, no questions asked. But this might be the only chance I ever get to find Inuyasha. I _need_ to go. Please…I don’t know if I can do this alone…"

Kagome sniffled, blinking back tears. She had said her peace; there was nothing to do except wait for their answer. For the love they bore her, she prayed that they would grant this request. The new moon had come and gone the other night. _Two months…please, just give me two more months…_

"I’ll go with you, Kagome," Shippou declared, climbing into her lap. Miroku and Sango also agreed after a brief hesitation. Kagome hopped to her feet and hugged each of her friends in turn, managing to keep the waterworks to a minimum. She had been nervous about their responses, but evidently they felt her request was reasonable in light of all the surrounding circumstances.

Since there was plenty of daylight left, the others acquiesced to Kagome’s desire to set out immediately. Kohaku was given the option of accompanying them or remaining behind, and chose the latter. During Kagome’s absence, Kaede had taken the distraught boy under her wing and taught him a few brushstrokes of the healing arts. Kohaku had immersed himself in the lessons, so much so that Sango thought he might have finally found his true calling. He had never been the most confident or willing taijiya, as she recalled. She hoped that someday he would resume his taijiya training, if only to carry on their father’s legacy, but for now she was simply glad to see him applying himself to something other than meditative self-loathing.

And so it came to pass that the Inu-gang minus its namesake began their journey anew, heading back to where they had last seen their missing member. That seemed as good a place as any to start the search. They would look for Inuyasha in the same way they’d hunted for jewel shards not so long ago, traveling from village to village in search of rumors of ‘youkai’ making trouble. Many humans either didn’t know or didn’t care to distinguish Inuyasha from lesser youkai, after all. And if fate decided to smile upon them with a rumor of a ‘hanyou’ in particular, they would pursue it to the ends of the Earth if need be.

If it was possible to find Inuyasha in a little less than two months, then he would be found. As for what they would do if they did manage to catch up to him, there were various ways to restrain or incapacitate a person of youkai blood without harming him. Ultimately, however, it would be up to Kagome to reach the true Inuyasha trapped deep within his own physical body. Miroku and Sango prayed that they could give her the opportunity. If anyone could defeat Hakago, or rile Inuyasha into doing it himself, it was Kagome. Her greatest strength was her compassionate heart. No other force in the universe possessed a better chance of returning Inuyasha to the people who loved him, to the place where he belonged.

Their steps lightened by determination, the group of friends journeyed into the unknown. At last, they were on the road again.

* * *

Hakago gazed lazily up at the canopy overhead, casually tossing and catching the Shikon no Tama in his hand as he walked. He’d been thinking about the jewel a lot lately. Unlike his former master, he understood the true nature of the innocent-looking little trinket. The Shikon no Tama was a source of immense power, so long as its wielder did not make a wish upon it. In that instance, the jewel was likely to turn on its wielder and bring only misery or death. Fortunately, Hakago was too intelligent to wish on the jewel, and in fact he didn’t really have anything to wish for.

This was not to say that he had no desires. He had longed for freedom and a strong body, but had achieved both of those goals. Reverting to a weak human for one night a month was a downer, but he could put up with it, especially because the absence of Inuyasha’s youki allowed him to call upon his own power. Just as he had been able to use his own power while inside Kagome’s body, as long as her spiritual energy was dormant. Now, he could stroll into a nest of youkai on a moonless night, and his barrier would keep him safe until sunrise. Inuyasha’s body had never been so well-protected.

Moving forward, well, he was still figuring out what he wanted. He supposed entertainment was at the top of the list, though he had already found several enjoyable pastimes. The thrill of the hunt, for example—be it youkai or animal prey—was most entertaining. And while he was currently unable to kill humans, he could still derive some amusement from tormenting them. Yesterday he had stumbled across a lone hermit in the woods and stalked him for the better part of an hour, revealing just enough evidence of his presence to make the man a nervous wreck. When he’d finally leapt out into the pitiful human’s path, snarling viciously with fangs and claws bared, the hermit collapsed. Hakago spent an enjoyable afternoon observing as the old man writhed on the ground, moaning and clutching his chest. Finally, he fell into a series of hard convulsions, then went still and breathed his last. Oh, yes, that had been most entertaining.

So Hakago felt neither the need nor the desire to wish upon the Shikon no Tama. Still, he hoped to find a way to use the jewel’s power. Inuyasha’s body was strong, but not invincible; someday he might meet an opponent too powerful to be overcome by the hanyou’s strength alone. That was one of the few situations in which Hakago now feared death. The dull sword at his side would certainly be of little help. Tetsusaiga had remained dormant, refusing to acknowledge its new master. He only continued to carry it in the hopes of bending it to his will once he had completely broken Inuyasha’s resistance. The sword was an incredible power in its own right, one worth waiting for.

Although…perhaps he did not have to wait. He caught the Shikon no Tama in his hand and held it up to the light, studying it intensely as though the action would cause it to reveal its deepest secrets. He had previously theorized that a tainted jewel shard would be enough to cement his control over Kagome, but had foregone that course of action in the interests of self-preservation. Logically, the completed Shikon no Tama should be able to exert some influence over a sword, even one with a formidable free will like Tetsusaiga. Deciding the theory was worth testing, Hakago gripped the jewel firmly in his left hand and drew the sword with his right. The blade remained in its shabby state, for the moment. Taking a deep breath, he turned his focus toward summoning the dark power of the Shikon no Tama.

For a moment, nothing happened. Then he felt it, a tingling sensation in his fingers which quickly spread up to his wrist, then his shoulder. The sinister energy of the polluted Shikon no Tama flowed through his veins, thick as blood, steadily spreading to encompass the whole of his being. His hanyou body throbbed with discomfort, but the corruption had no effect on his full-youkai mind. Ignoring the nausea settling in his gut, he gripped Tetsusaiga’s hilt with both hands, bringing the Shikon no Tama into direct contact with the stubborn sword and focusing the jewel’s energy upon it. The weapon pulsed, almost in anger, but immediately a dark stain of corruption appeared on the blade, dying the metal as black as night. Slowly the poison spread, working its way up the blade, crawling over every chip and imperfection. Hakago watched with bated breath, his triumphant grin widening as the darkness overcame the will of Inuyasha’s sword. Soon, only a dozen centimeters of unspoiled metal remained…five centimeters…two…

The instant the last sliver of light vanished from the blade, several things occurred simultaneously. Tetsusaiga transformed with a burst of malicious energy, crackles of black lightening flowing along its length. Its aura, as potent as ever, exploded in a shockwave which sent every creature within a half kilometer radius fleeing in all directions. Hakago might have spent a few moments savoring the sheer magnitude of the power now under his command, had his body and mind not suddenly been assailed by a foreign, yet oddly familiar presence. His nerves flared, a sensation of intense heat enveloping his entire form. He could practically hear the inhuman snarl of the caged beast within, clamoring for release. With Tetsusaiga no longer acting to contain the true nature of Inuyasha’s blood, his full-youkai essence was trying to take over. And for the first time since assuming custody of this body, Hakago felt real fear that he would be unable to maintain control.

But he was no amateur spellcaster, no novice in the possessive arts. He fought back against Inuyasha’s raging youkai side with equal vigor, seeking to restrain the untamable monster which was the hanyou’s darkest secret. He corralled the energy of the Shikon no Tama, which had begun to spill out uncontrollably, and turned it against his new enemy. The beast howled and clawed against the forces arrayed against it, but gradually it was forced back toward the dark cell from whence it came. Flush with confidence now, Hakago staggered to his feet, having sunk to his knees without realizing it. Raising Tetsusaiga, he did what he had begun this experiment to do.

"Kaze….no…Kizu!" he cried, slamming the blade into the earth. The resulting surge of youki was as satisfying as it was destructive, carving a swath of decimated plant life through the old forest. Perhaps it was the thrill of victory, or perhaps the stress of the ongoing internal war had finally gotten to him, but the sound which burst forth from Hakago’s lips then surprised even him.

It was laughter. High and bordering on maniacal, it carried through the deathly silent forest, leaving a sense of foreboding hanging heavily in the air. For almost a minute he cackled, savoring his success, the exhilaration of having walked through an inferno and come out alive. Finally, he decided that he’d flirted with disaster enough for one day, and dropped the Shikon no Tama from his hand. He didn’t hear the jewel hit the ground, with his senses overwhelmed by the rush of power within his mind, almost like a great receding tide. No longer tainted by the jewel’s evil, Tetsusaiga quickly reverted to its normal color and rustic shape, resuming the duty Inuyasha’s father had assigned to it. The hanyou’s full-youkai essence was thrown back into its cage, the door emphatically slammed behind it. Within seconds, everything returned to the way it had been a few minutes earlier, just before his attempt to use the jewel. Hakago again sank to a knee, breathing heavily, though his smirk never wavered.

"What a _rush!_ " he exclaimed, chuckling wickedly to himself. Indeed, he had never experienced anything even remotely like that. He could imagine his appearance during the transformation—glowing red eyes, jagged purple markings adorning his cheeks, his silver hair billowing behind him in the artificial gale created by the combined auras of Tetsusaiga, the jewel, and his own body clashing against each other. He’d been every bit a full-youkai, in body as well as in spirit, wielding a gigantic sword of pure night. Badass. Simply badass.

He reclaimed the Shikon no Tama and took a moment to study it, reflecting on how amazing it really was. With the jewel’s power, he could transform himself into a full-youkai at will and wield Tetsusaiga. That strategy was a double-edged sword, of course; breaking Tetsusaiga’s resistance meant losing its restrictive influence over Inuyasha’s youkai side. While that was certainly dangerous, he had shown here today that he was capable of restraining the beast, at least under normal circumstances and for a limited period of time. He clearly would not be able to contain the monster forever, but then, he didn’t have to. No enemy would last more than a few minutes against him if he assumed that form.

Standing and sheathing the sword, Hakago resumed his journey, enjoying the acrid stench of burnt vegetation for the simple reason that he had caused the destruction. His spirits had never been higher. With Tetsusaiga no longer able to reject him completely, he was as close to invincible as any mortal could hope to be. Wielding the Shikon no Tama, he was no longer just a hanyou, or even a full-youkai possessing a hanyou’s body. He was a kami in his own right.

And soon, all the creatures of the world would know it.

* * *

Kagome sighed miserably to herself as she trudged along at the head of the group. Shippou rode on her right shoulder and Kirara on her left, neither of them wanting anything to do with the love-fest going on behind them. Oh, Miroku and Sango were making an effort to be subtle, but anyone with a pair of ears could tell where their minds were right now. Every so often Kagome would hear the taijiya’s cheerful giggle or the monk’s deep chuckle, interspersed with the quiet conversation which she fortunately could not make out. She was sure they weren’t discussing anything too romantic—it was the _way_ they were talking that was more intimate than anything else—but still she did not envy her two youkai companions for their sensitive ears. And if she turned around, she knew from experience that the lovebirds would quickly untwine their joined hands and pretend to be walking together as companions only, rather than the excited fiancées they actually were.

After almost a week of this, Kagome was nearing the end of her rope. Once or twice a day they would talk like this, for fifteen to thirty minutes of hell. It was not jealousy which made Kagome want to pull her own hair out, though she was certainly envious of the happy couple. No, what really made her feel like a horrible person was the very fact that they were forced to enjoy such an innocent level of intimacy on the road. Miroku and Sango were clearly ready to settle down, marry and start a family. Yet here they were, obliged to accompany their pregnant friend on what would likely to prove to be a wild goose chase. Their happiness would probably be delayed for at least two months. The fact that neither of them had given the slightest indication that they resented her for it only made Kagome feel worse. They were such amazing friends…and she was a selfish witch for taking advantage of them.

That was overstating things, to be sure, but the general theme remained valid. She _was_ delaying her friends’ happiness, whether they would admit it or not. And finally, Kagome determined to do something about it. To this point, she had gotten caught up in pretending not to notice their closeness, or that it didn’t bother her. She’d put on more fake smiles in the past week than she cared to remember. If Miroku and Sango didn’t always find the act convincing, they probably assumed she was depressed about Inuyasha. She was, but that was not the only source of her melancholy.

Spinning abruptly, she asked with forced brightness if they could stop for an early lunch, feigning a sudden pregnancy craving. Her friends readily agreed, and she forced herself to eat even though she wasn’t really hungry. When Sango went into the woods to relieve herself, Kagome pulled Miroku aside and whispered almost conspiratorially in his ear.

"You know, Miroku-sama, if you ever want to be…alone, with Sango-chan, just let me know."

The monk pulled back and stared at her for a moment, understanding dawning in his dark eyes. Kagome was not pleased to see this; she’d been hoping for a ‘thank you’ and a lecherous wink, or something to that effect. Instead, Miroku nodded once and turned away from her, his serious demeanor suggesting that he’d realized more than Kagome intended him to. Sure enough, as the Inu-gang resumed its journey, Sango’s attempts to engage the monk in their previous topic of conversation proved fruitless. While not behaving coldly, Miroku made it clear he didn’t want to talk, leaving his fiancée to brood in silence. Kagome could practically feel the tension in the air. She didn’t think it was possible for her to feel guiltier than she already did, but this latest development had done it. She wondered if it would have been better to come out and explain her feelings clearly from the start.

That evening after dinner, she was psyching herself up to do just that when Miroku spoke from across the campfire. 

"Kagome-sama, are you going to take that walk you mentioned earlier?"

She stared at him blankly for a moment, studying the suggestive curve of his brow before finally catching his meaning. "O-oh! Yes, I think I’d like that."

"We’ll come with you," Sango offered, setting down hiraikotsu and her polishing materials. Kagome scrambled to her feet, holding out her hands to dissuade the taijiya from rising.

"That’s not necessary, Sango-chan. I just want to go for a moonlight walk. I won’t go far."

Sango frowned. "It’s no trouble, Kagome-chan. You shouldn’t be alone."

"I-I won’t be! Shippou-chan and Kirara will come with me, right?" she asked them.

"Sure."

*Mew*

Sango’s eyes narrowed as her frown deepened, and Kagome could imagine that her friend was trying to decide if her behavior was suspicious or just a little odd. She attempted to reign in her nerves before speaking again, with the goal of persuading Sango without appearing to _want_ to persuade her so badly.

"I don’t have the jewel anymore, Sango-chan, so I won’t be such a magnet for trouble. I promise to stay close, and I won’t be alone. You and Miroku-sama stay and relax. You…you’ve done a lot for me already," she added quietly. Sango’s gaze softened, and Kagome knew she had her. A few moments later, the miko strode out of camp with a victorious grin on her features, wisely concealing it from the taijiya, who had continued to watch her with some degree of suspicion.

"Well, that was odd," Sango observed after her friend had departed.

"Indeed," Miroku replied in a tone which immediately caused the taijiya to snap her head around to stare at him. Her eyes widened at what she saw, her heartbeat quickening in response to the way his gaze seemed to smolder as he watched her. She gasped at the sensual upturn at the corners of his lips, her cheeks flushing with nervous anticipation as he began to half crawl, half scoot his way closer to her. His words as he recovered from Naraku’s miasma floated seductively through her mind. _"Sango, if you want to wait until we’re married, then I will wait. It won’t change how I feel about you. But…if you wanted to be intimate—and I know we can only go so far—then…I think it would be really special."_ Her response to whether she would be willing to engage in such intimacy had been something along the lines of ‘we’ll see when you’re feeling better.’ With everything going on recently, there hadn’t been an opportunity to test the truth of that reply. Their stay in Kaede’s village had been marred by overarching concerns about the impending argument with Kagome which never came, as well as Inuyasha’s well-being. So neither of them had been in the mood to do anything more than hold hands. Now that they were on the road again, a reasonable accommodation reached with Kagome and journeying to find Inuyasha, Miroku was apparently in more of an amorous state of mind. With her pulse racing excitedly, Sango could not deny that she reciprocated the feeling.

But one thing stood out to her then, preventing her from surrendering willingly to his passionate embrace. Instead, she kept him at bay with a hand on his chest, glaring at him as her suspicion switched to a new target. Miroku’s easy grin wavered as her expression turned to one of fury, leading him to pull back involuntarily.

"Houshi-sama…did you put Kagome-chan up to this?"

Miroku grimaced, knowing the cat was out of the bag. Sango was intelligent; he really should have expected her to figure it out, especially given Kagome’s poor attempts at being casual. He’d been hoping that his fiancée wouldn’t realize something was amiss until _after_ he kissed her senseless, but apparently that was too much to ask. And he had better explain himself quickly, or he had a feeling that any form of physical intimacy would be off the table for the foreseeable future. Sango looked ready to put a skull-shaped dent in her newly-polished hiraikotsu. She was a private person and would not appreciate him asking their friends to leave so the two of them could make out. He knew that, which is why he hadn’t done it. He could only hope that the actual circumstances here would save him from being sent to the dog house.

"No, Sango. Believe it or not, it was Kagome-sama’s idea."

She studied him for a moment, but as soon as she decided that he was telling the truth, her cheeks flamed and she covered her face with her hands.

"Oh, this is so embarrassing. But how did she know that you…I mean, that we…"

"Wanted to be intimate?" Miroku finished. The glare Sango shot him then was so fierce that he almost ducked out of reflex. "I-if I had to hazard a guess," he hurriedly continued, "I would say that we have probably not been as discreet in our affections as we intended."

Sango threw her head back and groaned, unwittingly exposing her slender neck to his hungry gaze. His mouth went dry as he imagined what her heated flesh would taste like, salty with her sweat but tinged with a delightfully feminine flavor. Obviously his mind had not moved on from its previous train of thought, despite their serious conversation. He only hoped that those tantalizing prospects had merely been put on hold, rather than snuffed out entirely for the evening.

"That’s just great," Sango snapped. "Now Kagome-chan is totally uncomfortable. I told you we were being too obvious!"

Miroku bit back a retort which would definitely have earned him a lonely evening. Sango was gradually becoming more comfortable with him, and with her own sexuality. He didn’t want to ruin it by saying something foolish. And she already knew that she couldn’t rightfully place all of the blame on his shoulders, if the way she bit her lower lip was any indication. _Come to think of it, I really don’t remember Sango ever telling me that we were being too obvious…_ He did, however, carefully recall the words his fiancée had just spoken, and the misconception contained therein.

"In any case, I believe Kagome-sama is less uncomfortable than she is remorseful."

"Houshi-sama?"

"When she came to me today, she seemed…guilty, almost. She was obviously trying to hide it, but I could see it in her eyes. I believe she offered to give us some time alone because she feels badly for asking us to delay our wedding."

Sango’s expression morphed into one of understanding, even as she protested his opinion. "But that’s crazy! That’s…"

"Kagome-sama’s personality," Miroku finished, completing Sango’s unspoken thought. The taijiya growled to herself, clenching her fists as she rose to her feet, fueled by irritation mixed with lingering embarrassment.

"Oooh, that Kagome-chan! She’s too considerate for her own good sometimes."

"Wait, Sango," Miroku told her, grabbing her wrist to keep her from stalking off.

"Why? We’ve got to set Kagome-chan straight. We can’t let her keep feeling like this."

"I agree," the monk purred. "But let’s give Kagome-sama some time to herself first. It really is a nice night…don’t you think?"

Sango’s eyes shot as wide as saucers at his poorly-hidden meaning. Her face flushed all over again, his undeniably sensual tone causing goose bumps to rise on her skin. And when his fingers slid down from her wrist, tenderly massaging her palm as he often did when they held hands, Sango’s heart skipped a beat. Wasn’t there something important she had to do? For the life of her, she couldn’t seem to recall. Nor did she really want to.

Still, when he tugged gently on her hand, she might have refused to give in out of principle if her legs had not suddenly turned to jelly. The next thing she knew, she was sitting sideways in his lap, his arm wrapped possessively around her back and his hand lovingly stroking her cheek. She jerked her face away out of reflex, protesting half-heartedly, though she made no attempt to remove herself from his lap.

"W-we shouldn’t, Houshi-sama. Kagome-chan—"

"Wanted us to enjoy some alone time."

"B-b-but…um, the mood isn’t right."

Miroku chuckled deeply, a sound which sent a delightful shiver down Sango’s spine. "My dear, Sango. Have we not always created our own mood?"

He placed his fingers on her cheek once more, his touch light and reverent as he coaxed her into turning to face him. He brushed her tightly closed eyelids with the pads of his thumbs, the tender strokes causing her to squeeze them even tighter against the tears forming there. In that moment, Sango felt treasured. And when she finally found the courage to open her eyes and gaze into Miroku’s dark orbs, at the sheen of moisture covering those unfathomably deep pools of passion and love, she was lost.

Later, as she reflected back on the evening, it would occur to her that kissing a bed-ridden Miroku in that abandoned hut had been merely a pale shadow of the euphoria they could create together. But in that moment, her mind was completely consumed by him. All she felt was his body holding her close, his lips upon her own. Her arms wound their way around his neck, deepening the kiss and even earning a small gasp of surprise from him. He responded in kind, his left hand cupping the back of her head, then her neck, then her shoulder and back up again. Sango reached back and caught his wandering appendage, entwining their fingers and holding on for dear life. She withdrew for just a moment, breaking the lip lock in order to gaze into his eyes once more before diving back in.

A passion the likes of which she had never felt before began to flow through Sango then, almost frightening in its intensity. But she felt neither fear nor shame; she was here, in Miroku’s arms where she belonged. He was the man she loved, her husband and lover, her soul mate. He was also still somewhat of a lecher, she reflected, as his right hand which had been resting on her back began to drift lower. The movement was unhurried, giving her plenty of time to stop it, but Sango could think of no reason to do so. This didn’t really count as groping, after all. More importantly, the memory of her experience inside Mukotsu’s hut never entered her mind. She was safe here, with him, this man she trusted more than anyone. She had given him her life, her heart, all that she was, and they would cherish each other until death parted them.

As if rejoicing in her acceptance, Miroku’s wayward hand slipped down and cupped her backside firmly, massaging her flesh with definite intent. The movement wrung a gasp from her throat, as her passion increased further and her body heated another degree or two. She was so hot, burning inside and out; only some shred of decorum prevented her from loosening the collar of her robes. Instead she pressed her palm against Miroku’s chest, kneading the hard muscle through his clothing while absently wondering how warm his flesh would feel to the touch. Her lover had evidently grown tired of using his imagination, for he pulled his lips away from hers and sent them on a new journey, planting soft, open-mouthed kisses along her jawline. Sango could only sigh in bliss as he worshipped her, tilting her head to the side to grant him better access as he moved along the graceful contours of her chin and down to her neck. Her breath hitched when his lips settled onto a sensitive spot just above the intersection of her neck and shoulder. He sucked steadily for what seemed a small eternity, wringing a groan from her which became a strangled hiss as he briefly applied too much pressure. Even then, Sango wasn’t sure if the sensation was pain, or some strange sort of pleasure that felt bad and good at the same time. He soothed her afterwards, gently kissing her sore flesh in apology, and she decided that she didn’t really care.

Needing to feel his lips upon her own once more, Sango raised both of her hands and drew him up to meet her. In doing so she shifted unconsciously, causing her leg to slide further into his lap and encounter something hard. As her muddled mind struggled to identify the strange sensation, the mysterious object began to press rhythmically against her, its owner’s breathing growing heavy and irregular. Finally, Sango’s higher brain function came back online. The realization of what that hard object was and what Miroku was doing with it was shocking enough to shatter her passion-induced haze. She pulled back with a gasp, but failed to consider her awkward position and lost her balance. She toppled gracelessly out of Miroku’s lap, one of her flailing arms catching him in the chin and likewise knocking him flat on his back.

For a few moments Sango stared up at the night sky, as her breathing slowed and her mind pieced itself back together. A healthy blush colored her cheeks, the embarrassment born not so much from what they’d been doing, but how it had ended. Had she really just accidentally punched her lover? She opened her mouth to apologize but the delightful sound of Miroku’s soft laughter echoed into the night, bringing a smile to Sango’s lips. She shared in his mirth, shaking her head at their antics. Somehow, even when she tacitly gave Miroku permission to touch her backside, he still ended up getting whacked in the face. She laughed even harder.

It was at least a minute or two before their joyous, semi-hysterical laughter finally died down. After drying the few resulting tears, Sango rolled over to face her injured lover. ‘Injured’ because he could be seen playfully rubbing his sore chin, undoubtedly for her benefit. Sango had to bite her lip to keep from bursting into another round of giggles. _We are both officially bakas._ Was it odd that she didn’t mind anything they’d been doing? Some of it embarrassed her, now that her customary shyness had returned, but she knew that she would willingly partake in any of those activities with him again, provided that the ‘mood’ was right. But as Miroku had so eloquently put it, they created their own mood.

She was, however, glad that things had ended where they did, and not solely so her fiancé didn’t make a mess of himself. Being intimate with him was addicting; the further they went, the further she wanted to go. But she wanted their first time joining as man and woman to also be their first time joining as husband and wife, in the village which would become their home. Looking at him now, smiling somewhat sheepishly at her but with genuine happiness in his gaze, Sango knew that she did not need to communication this desire to him. Perhaps it would surprise an outside observer, for a known lecher to be so honorable with his intentions for a woman, but it was no surprise to Sango. Not anymore.

They lay there basking in their newfound intimacy for a few blissful minutes before Sango regretfully rose to her feet, declaring that they should go retrieve Kagome. She offered Miroku her hand, and he pulled himself up and while also bringing her body close in one smooth motion. Again, Sango’s would-be protests were silenced by his eyes, as he leaned forward and left a chaste but lingering kiss upon her lips. Embarrassed by the desires that simple touch inspired within her, Sango ducked her head and dragged him out of camp while wondering if her heartbeat would ever again slow to its normal rhythm.

They found Kagome lying on a grassy hillside, illuminated by the quarter moon shining brilliantly in the night sky. Shippou and Kirara were asleep in her arms, though the fire-cat at least had her ears perked for danger. The miko herself was also awake, gazing up at the celestial bodies with a contented grin brightening her features. She heard their approach and turned to glance at them, her smile widening at what she saw. Careful so as not to disturb the slumbering kitsune, she climbed gingerly to her feet.

"It’s a wonderful night, isn’t it?" she asked innocently, just a hint of suggestiveness in her tone. But Sango was too concerned to be embarrassed; her friend had to be set straight before they could move forward.

"Kagome-chan, I know you feel badly that Houshi-sama and I had to delay our wedding." The miko’s smile vanished in an instant, but she didn’t deny it. Satisfied, Sango continued speaking in a gentle, understanding tone which was not at all forced. "We don’t want you to feel that way. Houshi-sama and I are here because we want to be, not because anyone forced us."

Kagome snorted lightly and shook her head. "I know that, but—"

"Let me tell you something, Kagome-chan. Houshi-sama and I made a decision while you were staying in your time. We decided that even if we managed to convince you to remain behind in your world, we were going to look for Inuyasha anyway. And we weren’t going to get married until we had made an honest effort to find him. So whether you came with us or not, the wedding was never going to happen immediately. Houshi-sama and I can wait a few more months."

Kagome bit her lip as moisture pooled in her eyes. "You…really mean that?"

"Of course! Inuyasha is our friend, the same as you. Just because he’s a giant baka doesn’t mean we care for him any less."

In the next instant, Sango found her friend’s free arm around her neck, and returned the embrace wholeheartedly. For Kagome, the moment was one of profound closeness. These friends, this family from another world…a part of her had always known how they felt about this journey, but it took hearing it from them to put her doubts to rest. Without Inuyasha by her side, it was easier to allow her insecurities to fester, and to influence her daily life. It was something she would have to keep an eye on in the future, but for now she would rejoice in the knowledge that Miroku, Sango, Shippou and Kirara were there for her, when she needed them the most.

As she pulled away to offer unnecessary words of gratitude, something odd registered in her peripheral vision and she fixed her gaze upon the side of Sango’s neck. There, poking out over the edge of her kimono, was a mark the likes of which Kagome was fairly certain had never marred the reserved taijiya’s skin before. She covered her mouth with her hand, but had absolutely no chance of containing the giggles which spilled forth uncontrollably from her lips.

"What’s wrong, Kagome-chan?" Sango asked nervously. The miko was initially unable to respond, since she was too busy cracking up at Miroku’s panicked expression, the monk having noticed the same thing she had. He looked like a man resigned to his fate, though if asked whether the reward was worth the impending consequences, perhaps he would respond in the affirmative. Had his little ‘love mark’ been premeditated, or placed in the heat of the moment? Kagome would probably never know, but it was fun to guess.

"What’s so damn funny?!" Sango demanded, at last losing her patience. Still chuckling, Kagome reached out and tapped the mark on her friend’s neck ever so lightly.

"You’ve got a nice hickey going there, Sango-chan."

"A hic—"

The sound Sango made then could not possibly have been human. Kagome could almost imagine her hair bursting into flame as she rounded on the monk, her fists clenched at her sides as she glared daggers through his skull. Miroku could only rub the back of his head and smile in a manner he hoped was endearing, but no action on his part would save him from his fiancée’s wrath. Kagome took pity on him and decided to intervene, though she would make sure she didn’t accidentally take his place in the line of fire.

"Don’t worry, Sango-chan. It’s just a little one. And if you raise the collar of your robes a bit, like this," she declared, reaching out adjusting the cloth accordingly. "There! Now you can’t even see it."

It was true; the mark really wasn’t visible as long as she wore her kimono slightly higher on her shoulders than usual. Sango of course wasn’t about to take her word for it, and stormed back to camp to rummage around in Kagome’s bag for the pocket mirror the miko always carried. She spent a couple minutes studying her reflection before apparently deciding that she didn’t need to wear a scarf for the foreseeable future. Still, it was a wonder the glass did not shatter from the intensity of her stare. Sango harrumphed once, kicked out the fire and lay down on her sleeping roll without speaking a word to anyone.

Miroku heaved a long-suffering sigh, and Kagome had to bite her tongue to contain her mirth, tickled as she was by this entire situation. She nudged the monk in the side and passed him a look which clearly stated that he owed her one. _And you’d better apologize to Sango-chan in the morning, too!_ He nodded in resignation as though acquiescing to both of her points. Kagome patted him on the shoulder sympathetically, then strode over to her own sleeping roll and turned in for the night. Miroku was lucky to be able to fall asleep that evening without bruises to avoid laying on, even though his ‘love mark’ had probably been bestowed in the heat of passion. Even the monk was smart enough to anticipate Sango’s anger upon learning of the mark, at least when he wasn’t enraptured by the act of making out with her. But while the taijiya was mortified and furious now, she would be ready to forgive him by tomorrow…maybe.

Chuckling to herself one final time, Kagome cuddled Shippou closer to her chest and sighed contentedly. The kitsune had slept through the excitement, as only tired children are wont to do. Kagome yawned, embracing her own fatigue. She followed her nightly ritual of brushing her son’s aura with her spiritual energy, grinning at the minute but detectable response the tiny quarter-youkai gave. _Good night, little one._

As she drifted off to sleep, Kagome reflected that it really had been a wonderful night, for all of them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I’m dedicating this story to my great aunt, who passed away this afternoon at the age of 104. She was the sweetest lady I’ve ever met. We’ll miss you, Auntie. 
> 
> Not that I think she would have enjoyed this story, but as something I’ve put a lot of time and passion into writing, I think it’s appropriate to dedicate it to her.


	37. Kagome's Choice

"Please choose."

With those final words, the two shikigami girls fell silent. As they stared unblinkingly at her, awaiting her decision, Kagome ardently wished for the ability to turn back time. A couple hours ago when the local villagers mentioned two ‘strange glowing lines’ which supposedly appeared in the night sky and landed on the forbidden mountain, she could have convinced her friends that the rumor had such a low chance of being connected to Inuyasha so as to render it not worth pursuing. Of course, at the time she’d been desperate for any sort of lead and had leapt at the chance to investigate a strange rumor. And when she spotted Kikyou’s shinidamachu on the mountain, she’d charged after them without thinking, unwittingly leaving her friends far behind, stuck on the other side of a spiritual barrier. Now she found herself presented with a difficult decision by the dead miko’s shikigami. Her words to a dear friend came back to her. _"But you actually had Inuyasha’s life in your hands, and you chose to save him. I like to believe that if I ever have Kikyou’s life in my hands, I’ll do the same."_ She snorted dryly. _Well, Kouga-kun, it looks like I’ll finally get to see whether I’m as strong and noble as you are._

The decision was not as difficult as she feared. She did not like Kikyou, nor did she appreciate what the undead witch did to Inuyasha, intentionally or no. But she couldn’t see a person in need and not help them. Kikyou wasn’t a monster; she didn’t go around murdering people for fun or ruining lives for the hell of it. Even after her resurrection, she had spent time caring for wounded soldiers and had served as a temporary healer for several villages. In that sense at least, she was a good person. And if Kagome walked away now, she knew it would haunt her for the rest of her days. Still, to say that she was unenthusiastic about rescuing her only rival in love was an understatement. Nevertheless, her conscience won out and she turned to the shikigami, swallowing the unpleasant lump in her throat.

"How do I save her?"

The girls’ eyes widened in surprise, which indicated how shocked they were by her response. The emotional palette of shikigami was naturally limited, so only truly powerful feelings would register in their expressions. Kagome allowed herself a moment of bitter amusement at that thought. _They’re as stoic as their mistress, malicious wench that she is._ She shook her head, knowing that entertaining negative thoughts like that would make her task infinitely more difficult. As seemingly impossible as it was to focus on Kikyou’s positive aspects, she had to do so in order to have any chance of saving her.

"You need only to touch her," one of the girls answered.

"That will purify the miasma," the other added, the ensuing silence hanging heavily in the air. Kagome sensed that something important was being left unsaid, but in her irritation she chose to ignore it. The sooner she finished with this ignominious task, the sooner she could get away from this woman whom Inuyasha loved. Even in sleep, Kikyou’s face seemed to twist in scornful derision as she gazed at it. This was probably a figment of Kagome’s imagination, but it certainly seemed real enough. With any luck, Kikyou would walk away safely today and get eaten by a youkai tomorrow. That would satisfy her reincarnation’s stubborn conscience while also getting rid of the undead witch—the best of both worlds, so to speak.

Again Kagome shook her head, more violently this time. _I am not a terrible person. I am not a terrible person. I want…I_ will _save Kikyou._ It didn’t matter what she wanted. Saving Kikyou was the right thing to do, both for the stricken miko and for their absent hanyou. _What happens if Inuyasha finds out that I had the chance to save Kikyou, and instead let her die?_ It was that thought which finally prompted Kagome to slip off her socks and loafers and step toward the edge of the pond. She hesitated before dipping her foot into the water, noticing for the first time how polluted the liquid appeared. It looked like someone had been dumping toxic sludge from the modern era into it; this was the sort of water source that three-eyed fish and six-legged frogs came from. _It must be Naraku’s miasma_ , she realized. Kikyou could have been floating in this pond for weeks, the poison slowly leaking into the water as it spread throughout her body. She probably didn’t have much time left. Would it have been so much to ask for the miasma to have consumed Kikyou completely before today?

Kagome clapped her hands together, banishing those thoughts once again and preparing herself for what was to come. Even so, she yelped a bit and pulled her foot back a half second after dipping her toe into the water. The immersion hadn’t been painful, per se, but had definitely produced a significant level of discomfort. Sighing, she steeled her nerves and stepped into the pond. She grimaced in revulsion at the feeling of a foreign presence crawling over the skin of her legs. Luckily, the water only came up to her knees and Kikyou was near the edge. She would save the undead wench and get the hell out of here as quickly as possible. Unfortunately, Naraku’s miasma had other ideas.

Before Kagome realized what was happening, an invisible force reached out and grabbed her hand, which she’d extended toward Kikyou’s chest, and dragged both of them under the water. For such a small pond, it was unfathomably deep. A few meters down the sunlight vanished, blocked out by the miasma overhead. Kagome’s spiritual energy flared around her, providing the only light in this desolate place. Though she could feel the water surrounding her, running into her nose and mouth as a result of her surprise, she felt no panic. Her lungs were barely moving, the sluggish beat of her heart echoing loudly in her ears. A small eternity passed before her circulatory muscles contracted again, and Kagome realized that she was no longer on the normal earthly plane of existence. Through some strange phenomenon, time had slowed to a crawl here. Absently she wondered if she would be able to fight off the miasma if it tried to drown her. The strength of her spiritual energy indicated an affirmative answer, which was perhaps why the lingering essence of Naraku had decided not to attack her in such a manner. Feeling reasonably safe despite the odd situation, Kagome turned to the task at hand.

Kikyou was still unconscious, the miasma continuing to flow from underneath her robes. Pulling apart the garments, Kagome stifled a gasp. As if the wounds from Naraku’s tendrils were not severe enough, the miasma had begun to corrupt her previously unblemished flesh. Thick, veiny rivulets of poison branched out in all directions; there were so many converging on her neck in particular that it was a marvel that her head was still attached to her body. Once more Kagome wondered how Kikyou had survived for so long…and why she hadn’t simply dropped dead weeks ago. Once more she shook her head to clear it, but this time the dark thoughts refused to be banished. Here, immersed in this cesspool of evil, lurked a monster capable of feeding off every doubt, every speck of darkness in her heart. Kagome belatedly wished she had taken the time to truly firm her resolve before stepping into the water, but even that might have made no difference.

The miasma assailed her on all sides, causing her skin to prickle uncomfortably and nausea to roil in her belly. She fought back, but could not prevent the light of her aura from dimming. This was not the first time an outsider had tried to corrupt her heart. She had surrendered to the darkness once already. Would she falter a second time?

Kikyou’s eyes snapped open suddenly, adopting the same cruel and hateful gaze which still haunted Kagome’s memories. Some small element of her consciousness wondered if this was really happening, but that thread of logic could not compete with the overwhelming fear which stabbed through her, spreading a deadly cold through her gut. It was happening all over again, though Inuyasha had promised it never would. Kikyou was attacking her, and she…she was the same frightened little girl she’d always been.

"So, Kagome, this is how you seek to replace me."

"N-no, Kikyou!" Kagome protested weakly. "I never meant to—"

"Do not lie, you shameless slattern! Do not think that I am ignorant of one truly responsible for Inuyasha’s betrayal. When a pretty girl dresses like a whore, she must be advertising herself as such. And when a pretty whore spreads her legs, what man can resist? You lured him in with your body, then attempted to snare him with the one thing this cursed form of mine can never produce."

Kagome bit her lip and squeezed her eyes shut in a vain attempt to hold back her tears. But as Kikyou continued to berate her, some words stemming from her own memory and others from an unknown source, a new emotion rose within Kagome. Anger. It started as a flash of light behind her eyes, then a needle of warmth in her chest. White hot it burned, scorching her pure heart and leaving it with a layer of dead, burnt flesh. She was _not_ the same person she’d been months ago when Kikyou’s hurtful words had nearly caused her depart from this world forever. The things she’d been through since that day had changed her; she was no longer a frightened little girl, nor would she give in so easily. And when the target of Kikyou’s ridicule switched from her reincarnation to Inuyasha, the love Kagome held in her heart for her beloved hanyou transformed into something dark and venomous.

"You _bitch!_ " she snarled, the hate she had held back for so long bursting forth in an uncontrollable storm of violence. She reared back and threw her closed fist into Kikyou’s chin, hard. The artificial flesh was unsatisfyingly pliable under her knuckles, and the way the unconscious face snapped away and floated lifelessly back up made Kagome want to hit her again.

So she did. "It’s…all…your…fault!" she cried in between swings, unable to articulate what exactly she was blaming Kikyou for. But she knew that whatever it was, the undead witch didn’t just deserve a beating. Kikyou deserved to _die_. And that was enough of a justification.

The light in this place quickly dimmed even further, though Kagome did not truly notice beyond the passing observation that she was having trouble seeing well enough to land a clean blow. Frustrated, the young miko decided to end this. She grabbed Kikyou by the collar of her robes, spat into the water in the general direction of her face, and flung her away, down into the black depths. Despite her intentions, however, something kept her from releasing her grip on the dead miko’s robes. She cried out as the cloth scraped against her fingers, the momentum of her own attempted throw carrying both of them deeper into the darkness of the pond. Kagome growled to herself, unsure why she hadn’t been able to let Kikyou go. The witch deserved to die, did she not? So why were her hands still clutching Kikyou’s collar so tightly? What was this warm, tingling sensation in her fingers?

The soft, hesitant pulse of a familiar aura roused a part of Kagome which had nearly passed into oblivion. At once she realized what she’d been doing, and how wrong it was. Her aura strengthened as she soothed the child within her, returning some light to this desolate place. It was still far too dim for her liking, and she knew that she stood on tenuous ground. Her conscience still warred with the temptation to be rid of Kikyou once and for all. Her mind still dwelled on how _right_ it had felt to give the witch a taste of what she deserved.

That frightened Kagome more than anything. To her knowledge, she had never experienced the inclination to physically strike someone before. She’d never gotten into a fight at school, bullied her annoying little brother, or even slapped Miroku when he used to grope her occasionally. And yet, she now found it a major challenge to resist falling back into that seductive, violent mentality. Her fingers literally itched to feel Kikyou’s dead tissue give under brute force. Finally she folded them in front of her, though that did not help much. Having her hands together just made her want to wrap them around Kikyou’s no longer perfect neck. Idly she wondered how much pressure it would take to pop her head clean off.

Why did she feel this way? What the hell was the matter with her? _It’s this miasma,_ she realized. She was floating in what was for all intents and purposes the diluted essence of Naraku, whose specialty was messing with people’s emotions. And while she doubted even Naraku could create new feelings within a person, he could surely exploit emotions which were already present. _I…I do hate Kikyou._ There was no denying that. It had been true when Hakago attempted to corrupt her heart, and it was still true today. On some level, she loathed the dead miko who held the affections of the man she loved. But it had never been powerful enough to make her wish genuine harm upon Kikyou. Until she stepped into this miasma, which had amplified the hate she held deep within her heart exponentially. It was scary how close she’d come to losing to the darkness within herself, and how enticing that prospect still was. It would be so easy…so deliciously satisfying…

Kagome cried out in fear, slapping her cheeks in an effort to regain her senses. Her spiritual energy swelled, pushing back against the oppressive force of the miasma which had begun to drag her down into those inescapable depths. After a while, her aura reached a level of strength where she felt reasonably secure, though the constant pressure of Naraku’s evil continued to wear on her. If she kicked to the surface of the pond now, she could probably escape this living hell without too much trouble. But that would leave unaccomplished the task for which she had stepped into the water in the first place. Kikyou would be doomed to float in these black depths until her body and spirit gave out. She would spend her last moments on Earth in the dreadful embrace of the man she hated above all others. In that sense, Naraku would have the final victory he’d sought for so long.

Kagome couldn’t allow that. She had come here to save Kikyou, and that was what she was going to do. She did, however, decide to try a new approach—taking Kikyou out of the water before healing her wound. But her attempts to pull the unconscious miko toward the surface proved futile. The evil aura of the miasma flared in petulant rage, and all of Kagome’s efforts failed to elevate Kikyou’s body even a centimeter. Clearly, this wasn’t going to work. Naraku’s miasma had spent weeks festering inside and around Kikyou; he was a part of her now. If Kagome was going to break the dark hanyou’s hold and purge away his essence, she would have to do it here, deep in enemy territory.

Steeling her resolve, she pressed her hands to Kikyou’s chest and closed her eyes, focusing her spiritual energy. In response, the miasma exploded with power, nearly throwing her back. She gritted her teeth and intensified her efforts, but it was akin to fighting off a hurricane with an umbrella. Kagome sensed her resolve wavering, and knew that it would soon collapse altogether. Perhaps that was the problem. She was strong enough to purify this miasma; she _knew_ she was. But then, it was not a question of strength, was it? In order to achieve something, a person must possess both the ability and the will. It was painfully obvious which of those qualities she lacked. How could she save Kikyou when she held no true, heartfelt desire to do so? Strip away all of the logic and morality, and what remained was a jealous woman who wanted her rival in love to leave and never return. She could no more save Kikyou than she could forget about their mutual love interest.

Inuyasha’s face flashed before her eyes, causing Kagome’s heart to swell. He was devastated, his eyes cast in shadow and his expression haunted. _That’s how he looked when he thought that Kikyou was dead. He searched all night for her, and when he came back, he was a shell of himself._ Again, she wondered what Inuyasha would do if he found out that she had refused or failed to save Kikyou when given the chance. How would he look at her, the woman who claimed to love him, and yet who could behave so contradictory to his own desires? Kagome ardently hoped to never learn the answer. When viewed in that light, however, this was less about Kikyou than it was about Inuyasha. Would she respect his feelings and desires, even if they might leave her unfulfilled? Did she love him enough to accept pain herself, rather than selfishly hurting him?

Kagome’s spiritual power surged, turning the tide of the battle. At last she had found her resolve. _It’s not_ my _choice. It’s_ Inuyasha’s _choice. I never wanted to choose for him, and I won’t start now!_ There was still hope, after all. But their future together had to be left up to Inuyasha. If he chose to spend his life with her, she wanted it to be because he loved her, not because his true love had died and he was settling for the next best thing. If the choice was between losing him to Kikyou and a marriage marred by distrust and guilt, then Kagome would let him go. She deserved his whole heart, and he deserved the freedom to decide whether to give it to her. Anything less was an illusion, and could not serve as the basis for a lasting, loving relationship. She would not win Inuyasha through deceit. He would stay for love, or not at all.

Naraku’s essence resisted desperately, but Kagome was not to be deterred. She was no longer doing this for Kikyou, but for Inuyasha. And that made all the difference in the world. With a final defiant pulse, the dark hanyou’s aura yielded to the overwhelming force of her spiritual energy. Pure light exploded in all directions, driving away the blackness and instantly healing Kikyou’s wounds. Every trace of Naraku’s evil vanished from her being, and the surrounding water. But Kagome had no time to revel in her success, as water suddenly and unexpectedly rushed into her open mouth. Whatever strange phenomenon had separated this pond from normal space-time had vanished along with Naraku’s miasma. Now she found herself submerged in cold water, several meters down with hardly any air in her lungs. It seemed surreal that she should die from something as simple as drowning immediately after defeating a great evil, but that was the possibility which now confronted her.

Desperately Kagome kicked toward the surface, the sunlight seemingly kilometers away. Soon her lungs burned, her movements becoming frantic as the last of her air escaped. Too far. It was too far; she would never make it. _I’m…I’m going to die like this._ Though her mind rebelled at the idea, her vision was already blurring, her consciousness fading away like a candle at the end of its wick. If only she had known this would happen. She could have drawn in a great breath before being pulled underwater. If only the Kami had given her a little more air…if only…if only…

Kagome dimly felt a hand close around her neck, gripping it roughly yet without compressing her windpipe. She was not cognizant of being propelled upwards, against the steady pull of gravity. Her body did, however, react immediately the instant her head rose above the surface of the pond. That tiny breath of fresh air, though limited by the water she had breathed in, was like being born all over again. Her mind came back from the brink just as a profound feeling of weightlessness enveloped her. The next thing Kagome knew, she was underwater again. But this time her backside rested against solid earth, and that one indescribably wonderful sample of lifesaving air had given her the strength to fight for another moment or two.

Fortunately, she did not have far to go. As her head broke the surface, Kagome tried to inhale a massive breath, but her body convulsed, desperate to expel the fluid in her lungs. She turned over and wretched, involuntary tears mingling with swallowed water and the contents of her stomach in the pond beneath her. For several minutes she coughed and sputtered, her thin frame wracked by the tremors of a person brought back from the edge of death. When at last she was able to breathe normally again, she flopped exhaustedly onto her back. She floated bonelessly in the shallows, too physically drained to pull herself onto dry land just yet. And when she felt that she was finally ready to face her ‘savior,’ she cautiously opened her eyes.

There she was, hovering in the air above the center of the pond, supported by her shinidamachu. Her hair was matted and her clothes were soaked, but even so she was beautiful. The only thing which took away from her appearance was the coldness of her expression.

"Why did you save me?" Kikyou demanded, failing to mask her irritation. Kagome responded in kind; she was likewise annoyed, for a variety of reasons.

"Believe me, I didn’t do it for you."

"Hmph, I see. I likewise did not pull you from your watery grave for your own sake."

Kagome’s initial interpretation of those words was that Kikyou had saved her for Inuyasha’s sake, because even if the hanyou didn’t love her, he would be devastated by the deaths of her and their child. Then she recalled how the knowledge of her pregnancy had stilled Kikyou’s arrow previously, and realized that a far more likely explanation was that the professional miko refused to stand idly by while an innocent drowned. That made more sense. Again, Kikyou was a good person in some aspects; she was not a monster. She was, however, a vindictive bitch.

"The next time you dive underwater, try holding your breath."

Kagome saw red at those words. Never mind that she hadn’t expected to be pulled under, or that she wouldn’t have sunk so deep if Kikyou had not caused hate to grow and fester within her. But she had only been underwater in the first place because she’d been trying to save _Kikyou’s_ sorry behind!

Somehow Kagome held her tongue, likely because the dead witch was already floating away, and she realized that she had another decision to make. Namely, whether to tell Kikyou about Inuyasha. On the one hand, Kagome really didn’t feel like sharing any information with this cruel woman. On the other, this was a case where what Kikyou didn’t know really _could_ hurt her. And if that happened, if Hakago was able to kill Kikyou using Inuyasha’s body, what effect would that have on the hanyou’s will to resist? It was a frightening thought. If anything could break Inuyasha, it was hurting someone he loved. At least if Kikyou was aware of the situation, she could take steps to protect herself the next time they met.

"Kikyou, wait!" she cried, half convinced that the dead miko would simply ignore her. Perhaps it was the desperation in her tone, but Kikyou did pause her flight in midair, though she remained facing away from her. Sensing that her time was short, Kagome continued in a soft, slightly trembling voice.

"I should tell you…what happened to Inuyasha."

Kikyou did turn around at this, her expression one of concern mixed with repressed anger. She floated down to stand on the opposite side of the pond, glaring daggers at her reincarnation the entire time. Kagome gulped, but resisted the urge to break eye contact. She was not a child, and this was not her fault…not really. She would be brave, and take whatever verbal abuse her audience decided to visit upon her.

Upon finishing the tale, Kagome schooled her features and waited for Kikyou’s reaction. To her surprise, the dead miko did not immediately begin yelling at her. Nor did she draw an arrow, call her a ‘whore,’ or assail her with any other poisonous words. Instead she merely stared at her, wearing a glower which softened only slightly over time. It was clear that she was beyond incensed, but perhaps she realized that the rightful target for her ire was not present. Finally she turned and soared off above canopy without a word.

Kagome thought about calling after her, but decided against it. She was confused by Kikyou’s relatively calm demeanor, and didn’t want to risk incurring her wrath. Beyond that, nothing she could say would do any good. She didn’t need to ask Kikyou to try to free Inuyasha from Hakago’s influence; she would do that anyway. As for not dragging him to hell and allowing him to make his own choice in the matter…in the best case, Kikyou would ignore those requests. Otherwise she would deny them outright. Either way, it was a waste of Kagome’s breath to bring up the subject. So instead she let Kikyou go, and at last found herself alone in the clearing.

Only then did she realize how late it was; the sun was already beginning to set below the tree line in the west. A cool breeze blew in, causing her to shiver. Gingerly she climbed out of the pond and seated herself on the bank, her movements stiff with the cold. The air was at a higher temperature than the water, but not by a wide enough margin to warm her soaked skin and dry her waterlogged clothing. By the time her friends found her five or ten minutes later, her teeth were already chattering.

"Kagome!"

"Kagome-chan! What happened?"

"K-K-Kikyou," she managed to stutter.

"What?! That witch is still alive?!"

In the past, Kagome might have reprimanded Shippou for referring to Kikyou in such a manner, but now she only grinned and patted his head. Or tried to—her hand was shaking too much to respond to her commands with any degree of precision.

"You can explain later, Kagome-chan," Sango announced in a mothering tone. "Let’s get you dry and warm first."

"I’ll gather firewood," Miroku declared.

"N-N-No!" Kagome cried, drawing four surprised gazes. Grimacing, she tried to explain. "F-Fire, yes. Just…n-n-not here."

Understanding her desire, if not fully comprehending the reasons behind it, her friends helped her settle onto Kirara’s back. The fire-cat flew them a short distance upstream, far enough away so that human ears could not hear the waterfall, but close enough to the stream which fed it to serve as a convenient water source. Miroku had a blazing fire going in record time, aided by Kirara who gathered enough wood to keep it going for at least a week. Then the monk and kitsune respectfully left camp while Sango tended to her. Shippou probably went along to make sure Miroku didn’t peek, not that Kagome thought such a chaperone was necessary. At this point, she didn’t really care who saw her naked, as long they would help her get warm.

Despite her misery, Kagome was oddly amused by Sango’s businesslike yet comforting demeanor. The taijiya sat her next to the fire and removed her wet clothes, then helped her dry off with towels. Finally she bundled her up in layers of warm clothing and blankets. When that didn’t do the trick, she rolled out Kagome’s sleeping bag and tucked her into it, piling the blankets on top. Then Sango made her one of the soups she had brought from the modern era, blowing on each spoonful to cool it before feeding it to Kagome so sure-handedly that not a single drop was spilled. Within an hour, warmed by the broth and her friend’s loving care, the miko had stopped shivering. She still felt cold, but sensed that this had nothing to do with her body’s actual temperature. _Great, I’m probably going to get sick now_. As disappointing as this thought was, it did not stop her from giving Sango her honest praise.

"Thanks, Sango-chan. You’re going to be a great mom someday."

The taijiya blushed and looked away, likely because Miroku had returned to camp by that point and was sitting within earshot. Kagome chuckled to herself briefly before her laughter descended into coughing. As the moon rose in the night sky, so did her fever. It did not seem too severe, but she was definitely sick. _Probably from ingesting germ-infested pond water_. Small standing bodies of water like that were often not very sanitary, even when they weren’t polluted by Naraku’s miasma.

Resolving to make the best of it, Kagome went to sleep early with the hopes of feeling better by morning. She had to recover as quickly as possible. Each delay was another lost opportunity to find Inuyasha. And every day lost made it less likely that she would ever see her beloved hanyou again.

The clock was ticking.

* * *

Hakago chuckled to himself and shook his head. _Humans are such pitiful creatures._ He stood atop a rise overlooking the burning town, taking in the carnage almost gleefully. The smell of smoke had drawn him here, the great plume rising into the sky serving as a beacon. The scents and sounds of this place were nothing short of wonderful. Women wept as their abductors laughed and cheered, filled with the thrill of conquest. For it could not reasonably be called a battle. It didn’t take a genius to figure out what was happening down there. The aggressors were a group of two or three dozen men, likely bandits or unemployed mercenaries, who attacked unsuspecting villages in the countryside. They killed all the men, rounded up the women, stole everything of value and burned the rest. Then they moved on, murdering and pillaging as they went. When they could carry no more loot, they probably hocked their ill-gotten goods at one of the larger cities and drank and whored until their purses were empty. Then the violent cycle would start all over again.

Hakago could admire the general strategy for its simplicity and effectiveness, but he could not understand the mindset. How long did they think this could continue? If some daimyo’s army didn’t annihilate them, then binge drinking or disease certainly would. These men were living a lifestyle devoted to pleasure; it might be nice while it lasted, but it would be unnaturally short. There was a reason mercenaries seldom died of old age. Still, given the choice of dirt farming in some poor village or doing what they were doing, Hakago supposed he could understand their choice. There was something to be said for living for the present moment, after all. It was not how he had chosen to live, but he could understand it. He also understood who these men were, courtesy of Inuyasha’s memories. Humans who preyed upon other humans were criminals; they were not soldiers, nor would they fight like soldiers. And fortunately for them, Hakago did not share the same sense of morality as the previous owner of this hanyou body. He did, however, wonder if the motley group of bandits might serve as a source of entertainment.

He strode down toward the town, amused that no one even spotted him until he had already passed the first row of burning huts. Even then, only a few turned their swords on him, demanding that he stop and surrender his weapon. The rest continued on with their sport, unaware of the outsider in their midst. Hakago did as he was told, freezing in his tracks and tossing Tetsusaiga to the ground. He wouldn’t need the sword to deal with this rabble. Finally a man who was taller and wearing better-quality armour than the rest arrived on the scene, glaring at the newcomer as if holding him personally responsible for interrupting his fun.

"Who the fuck are you?" the man snapped. "A youkai? What are you doing here and why shouldn’t I just kill you where you stand?"

"Oh, you should," Hakago replied venomously. "You definitely should. But you won’t be able to."

The leader snorted, then nodded meaningfully, and three of his lackeys closed in with swords raised. Hakago smirked, then launched himself forward in the blink of an eye. He sensed that Inuyasha would stop him in the last instant before tearing his claws through the face of one of his attackers, so instead he folded his fingers into a fist. The hanyou’s resistance made it feel like punching someone underwater, but the man’s head snapped back, his nose probably broken. Inuyasha abhorred the taking of human life, but he held no love for these predators. If he were in control of his own body, he would probably beat the bandits up himself. Therefore, he was unable to prevent Hakago from doing the same.

All things considered, Hakago went easy on the pitiful humans, even as more of them joined the fray. A few were knocked unconscious, others would fall asleep that evening with crooked noses or missing teeth, but all would live. And more importantly, all would be able to fight. That was crucial for Hakago’s plans. When all those brave enough to attack him had finally been dispatched, he turned to face the leader, who now appeared decidedly less smug than before.

"W-What do you want?"

Hakago grinned at the man’s wavering false bravado, but decided to take a peaceful approach. He didn’t need to kill the leader of this group…yet.

"What is your name, Leader-sama?" he asked without any hint of mocking in his tone.

"I am Masato," the leader answered, seemingly recovering some of his confidence. "Masato the Manslayer."

Hakago almost laughed at the ridiculous nickname as well as the arrogant way in which it was delivered, as though the very mention of ‘Masato the Manslayer’ should have him pissing in his hakama. In reality, the idiot had probably made the name up to sound tougher than he actually was. But being the best fighter among this motley crew didn’t mean very much, and Hakago doubted that Masato was anything more than a common criminal. He did, however, hold the loyalty of the men under his command, so Hakago determined to play nice. At least for now.

"Greetings, Masato-san. I am Hakago. I believe we share similar…interests."

"The only interest I have is in you turning around and going back to wherever the hell you came from." Approving shouts and cheers from his men seemed to galvanize Masato even further, and Hakago began to wonder if another beating would be necessary to bring the bandits to heel.

"That would be a waste of our potential," he replied calmly. "Tell me, has there been a recent opportunity which your group was unable to take advantage of?"

"No! We conquer all that we mean to!" Masato answered quickly. Too quickly. For behind him, the murmuring began. Hakago waited patiently until one of the men spoke up.

"Well…there was that one castle…"

"Shut up!" Masato ordered, but it was too late. The seed had been planted; all it needed was a little care to germinate.

"A castle you could not ‘conquer,’ I assume?" Hakago asked.

"It had a hundred soldiers defending it!" one of the men exclaimed.

"A hundred fifty," Masato countered. "Why the hell does it matter?"

"What would you say if I told you that I could deliver that castle to you?" Hakago proposed.

"I’d say you’re full of shit."

"Am I? Allow me the chance to prove it. I will capture the castle by myself, then turn it over to you. If I fail, you can walk away and the defenders will never be the wiser. What do you say?"

Masato looked like he wanted to say something involving the words ‘fuck’ and ‘off,’ but the increased murmuring from his men stilled his tongue. The greedy bandits were already enamored by the prospect of capturing the one that got away, especially since ‘the one’ was apparently a wealthy castle. Now a powerful youkai was offering to put them in possession of all those riches, at no personal risk to them? They would be fools to refuse. And if their leader tried to deny them that opportunity, then there might very well be a mutiny. A fact which Masato understood well.

"Fine!" he snapped. "You will capture the castle on your own, and then turn _every_ item of value over to us. If I’m feeling generous, I may give you a share of the loot."

Hakago nodded his agreement to the terms, suppressing a smirk as a cheer went up, the bandits rejoicing at the prospect of pillaging a wealthy castle rather than piss-poor farming villages. Masato harrumphed and stormed off, followed by his closest lackeys. Truthfully, Hakago didn’t care about the loot; he simply desired entertainment. And speaking of, he spied another opportunity for entertainment a few minutes later as the bandits returned to their previous pursuits. They forced the village women into serving them sake, but mostly it was just an excuse to get drunk, grope and make suggestive comments. Finally one of the women smashed an entire jug over the head of an especially obnoxious bandit. Perhaps she was defending a friend or relative, or her temper had simply snapped, but either way the prospects did not look good for her. When the two closest men made a grab for her, however, she kicked one in the groin with testicle-shattering force and literally tried to claw out the eyes of the other. Then she dodged a few more half-hearted attempts and bolted, making a bee-line for the nearby forest.

"After her!" Masato ordered, and some of his less-inebriated men moved to comply.

"Wait!" Hakago exclaimed, moving to block their path. "Please, allow me."

Most of the bandits shrugged and returned to their drinking. There were plenty of more docile women remaining, after all. Masato folded his arms and glared at him expectantly.

"Well, are you gonna go or not?"

Hakago adopted his most feral grin. "I’ll give her a nice head start. The hunt is more enjoyable that way."

Masato shrunk back in fear, then hurried off with his tail between his legs. Hakago turned and watched his quarry until she vanished into the trees. _Heh, she runs pretty fast for a human._ This would be fun; he’d never hunted such feisty prey before. If she gave him good sport, then perhaps he’d let her go. If not, he’d drag her back to the village and see what ‘Masato the Manslayer’ wanted to do with her. He didn’t really care either way; the woman was nothing to him. None of them were. It was true that they had no cause to fear lustful advances from him, but that was only because he was a child at heart. They should fear him for other reasons. _I can’t hurt you, girl, but you don’t know that. Run, my prey. Run as fast as you can._

Oh, yes, this would be most entertaining.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Well, my dear readers, you can now check off something which should be on every Inuyasha fan’s bucket list: read a story where Kagome punches Kikyou in the face. Even people who don’t hate Kikyou can get on board with that! In the right context, of course. 
> 
> I know that the timeline is a little different from canon here. The miasma has been festering in that pond for a lot longer than it did in the manga, which is part of the reason why Kagome has a much more difficult time saving Kikyou. The other reason is Kagome’s emotional state. In the manga, she didn’t even really consider the option of not saving Kikyou until after she’d already done so. That was obviously not the case in this story, and under the circumstances I can’t really say that I blame her.


	38. The Prince of Thieves

Hakago gazed up into the night sky, his customary smirk fading only slightly as he prepared himself for what was to come. The moon had been full a few nights ago and was in the early stages of waning. A smaller moon would have suited his purposes better, since his prey relied on the light and he could see perfectly well even on the darkest of nights. But if he executed his plan properly, and got a little luck, then it wouldn’t matter. He would still accomplish his goal even if things went awry, but it would be…messier.

It had taken the bandits a full week to ride back to the castle they’d previously decided against attacking. That had clearly been a wise decision; the defenses were fairly impressive. Even an army would take heavy casualties trying to storm the walls. But there were apparently no enemy armies in the area, so the defenders had let their guard down. Sentries walked the battlements, but they seemed bored and disinterested, even from afar. And there were too few of them. If a force of humans tried to cross the expanse of cleared land surrounding the castle on all sides, they would surely be spotted. The alarm would go up, and the garrison would rouse to repulse the assault. What they did not expect, however, was for one man to attempt to sneak into their midst, especially not a man with supernatural powers and the ability to run faster than any horse. If he could just make it into the castle without being seen, then the conflict would be over in a matter of minutes, and in a fashion which would impress his new allies. But then, that was where the luck came in. No matter how he made his approach, there was a chance that he would be spotted. But he would do what he could to limit that possibility, and hoped that his budding skill at the hunt would prove decisive.

He bided his time until a few clouds drifted in front of the moon, dimming the light. Two sentries walked the section of wall directly across from him, and the instant they turned their attention to each other instead of their duty, Hakago launched into a moderate sprint which balanced speed against stealth. He made it halfway to the wall before a sudden wind dispersed the clouds, and one of the sentries turned to gaze in his direction. Cursing, he threw himself to the ground and lay perfectly still. Fortunately, the sentry had not given the area more than a cursory glance. Hakago could hear the conversation now, which both men obviously found far more interesting than their jobs. When they threw their heads back in laughter, he crept closer still, like a feline stalking a potential meal, only moving when the prey is not looking. Then the sentries went their separate ways, resuming their long, tedious task. As soon as he felt comfortable in doing so, Hakago sprinted the rest of the way to the wall.

With a leap he propelled himself up to the top of the structure, grabbing hold of the parapet and levering himself up with his arms. After making sure the coast was clear, he climbed over the parapet and landed in a crouch on the wall itself. Then he looked over the other side and, upon finding that the courtyard below was also clear, vaulted over into the interior of the castle. Creeping silently along the wall, he swiftly located the main barracks where most of the soldiers slept, blissfully unaware of their impending doom. He drew Tetsusaiga, then fished the Shikon no Tama from his robes. He pressed the jewel to the sword’s hilt exactly as he’d done before, grinning in satisfaction as the corruption took hold. Tetsusaiga exploded violently to life as soon as its resistance yielded to the dark power of the jewel, and Inuyasha’s full-youkai essence once more clamored for release. But this time Hakago was prepared, and had an easier time containing the raging beast within. He would eventually be overwhelmed if he remained in this form for too long, but his grace period had certainly increased. Not that it really mattered for his current purposes.

The surge of energy alerted the sentries to the danger. Shouts went up, and one of them blew his horn to sound the alarm. But it was far too late. Even as the men inside the barracks began to roll out of bed and grab their weapons, Hakago slammed Tetsusaiga’s blade into the ground. The resulting Kaze no Kizu utterly consumed the building, drowning out cries of pain and terror. If anyone managed to survive the carnage, they now lay buried under a mountain of debris, and would not be alive for long.

Hakago cackled gleefully, once again savoring the incomparable rush of living on the edge. He had counted on the influence of Inuyasha’s full-youkai side to make it easier to overcome the hanyou’s resistance to killing, and the gamble had succeeded. And while he doubted that such a strategy would work against individuals which Inuyasha actually knew and cared for, it was only a matter of time before that would cease to be the case. The hanyou’s resistance weakened by the day. Soon he, Hakago, would be the sole and true master of this body. In the meantime, he still had a task to complete.

Releasing the Shikon no Tama reverted him to hanyou form once more, and he sheathed the now dormant Tetsusaiga as he stooped to pick up the jewel. An arrow from one of the sentries lodged in his lower back as he straightened up, causing him to stagger briefly. But it would take far more than a single projectile to bring him down, and he rounded on the sentry with sudden fury burning in his gaze. Faced with such an enemy, the man fumbled the next arrow he had been trying to nock. Not that it would have made any difference anyway.

Hakago quickly discovered that he was still unable to kill humans in his hanyou form, but this did not deter him. A man with a broken arm could no longer draw a bow or wield a sword, and one with a fractured skull couldn’t do much of anything at all. As the sentries on the opposite side of the wall tried to regroup, he tore open the main gate with his claws and Inuyasha’s formidable youki. That was the prearranged signal which would send the lurking bandits charging in on horseback. With that objective completed, Hakago fell upon the surviving soldiers, laughing as he repulsed their futile attempts and struck back with closed fists, pulverizing flesh and shattering bone. Most of the incapacitated soldiers would live, at least until the bandits arrived to finish them off, but those who had fallen off of the wall might mercifully meet their ends sooner than that. A couple of the more cowardly but undoubtedly smarter soldiers managed to pull horses from the stable and escape the castle before Hakago’s reinforcements arrived to seal the entrance. He thought about pursuing them, but decided against it. The coming weeks would be far more entertaining if word of their exploits spread.

When the bandits finally arrived, hollering fiercely and ready for battle, they found laid out before them a castle where there was not much to do aside from plunder, a task which they took to with gusto. Store rooms were broken into, officers’ chambers were looted, and not a single item of value lay unclaimed. By the time all of the plunder was gathered in the center of the castle, the atmosphere had changed to one of celebration. An ample supply of sake had been discovered in one of the officers’ rooms, and was being shared by all. Between the alcohol, fine weapons and currency, this had been a wonderful haul. Most of the men had probably never seen so much wealth gathered in one place before; this had been a military installation, but it possessed funds to pay the soldiers and carry out the business of its liege lord. Funds which now belonged to a gang of drunken criminals, and was soon likely to find its way into the purses of shady tavern keepers and cheap prostitutes. Hakago could only shake his head in amusement at the thought.

The only person who did not share in the celebratory mood was Masato, and for good reason—the ‘Manslayer’ was no longer as appealing as a youkai who could take out a hundred fifty heavily armed men by himself. Eventually a cry went up among the bandits, calling for ‘Hakago-sama’ to be their new leader. Masato tried to argue against it, but his voice was promptly drowned out and he stormed off to pout by himself. At that point, Hakago, who had been sitting off to the side observing the merriment, stepped forward and graciously accepted the position. He promised to make them the richest bandits in history, and they erupted in their loudest cheer yet. _Kukuku…what a bunch of fools._

"Whoa, Boss-sama!" one of the fools exclaimed. "You have an arrow in your back!"

"Hm?" Hakago muttered, feigning surprise as he glanced over his shoulder. He hadn’t honestly forgotten about the arrow lodged somewhere near his kidney, but the pain had been bearable so he’d left it there to use as something of a propaganda tool.

"So I do," he observed casually, reaching back and removing the projectile with a single sharp tug. Some of the men gasped in sympathy, but he shrugged and tossed the arrow to the side, playing it off as the flesh wound it was to this hanyou body. Then he snatched a mug of sake from the nearest man and downed it in one huge gulp. Another cheer went up, the men thrilled to follow such a badass. _Fools! The whole lot of you._

The story of the bandits and their youkai leader would spread like wildfire through the region. The populace would cower in fear, and feudal lords would wonder if even their armies were sufficient to protect them. Perhaps some members of the youkai world would hear of his exploits and come to investigate as well.

Either way, things were about to get much more interesting.

* * *

Kagome patted Sango’s shoulder sympathetically, wishing there was more she could do. But unfortunately, the burden of raising the taijiya’s downtrodden spirits rested solely upon her fiancé’s shoulders. The same fiancé who was currently sitting in the home of one of his past ‘acquaintances,’ _hopefully_ turning down a marriage proposal. For once Kagome was glad that Inuyasha wasn’t here, as he would likely say something completely insensitive. _‘Shame on a man who does not accept a woman’s proposition,’ or something like that. Baka._ At least the only other male present was either too young or too intelligent to say anything to make Sango feel worse. Shippou had asked a few innocent questions, but Kagome was happy to answer those.

"Don’t worry, Sango-chan," she tried, her tone artificially bright. "I’m sure Miroku-sama is setting them straight right now. This sort of thing…is just part of his past."

Sango snorted. "Yeah, the ‘past is in the past,’ right?" she muttered sarcastically. "Until it rears its pretty little head."

Kagome grimaced and gave up her attempts to lighten her friend’s mood. She could understand why Sango was upset, but she also thought the taijiya was making a bigger deal of this than it actually was. Especially considering how close she and Miroku had grown recently. The monk wasn’t about to cheat on Sango just because some old ‘acquaintance’ batted her eyelashes at him. Likely the only reason they were still here at all was because Shima had complained that a youkai was coming to take her as his bride tonight. Miroku had too much of a soft spot for damsels in distress to ignore that.

Still, the delay was rather annoying and Kagome hoped the matter would be resolved soon. They had already been laid up for three days while she got over her illness, her friends having convinced her that she would recover more quickly if she rested. They’d undoubtedly been right, but Sango had almost been forced to tie her in the sleeping bag on that last day. Luckily, she’d felt well enough the following morning to renew their journey. The unfortunate part was that they still had no destination in mind, no concrete leads. It was just dumb luck—or bad luck, depending on your perspective—that they’d stumbled upon Shima and her family in their hour of need. That Sango was both angry and jealous came as no surprise to Kagome, but that she took it this far was a bit disconcerting. Hopefully Miroku would resolve this quickly before any serious damage was done.

As it turned out, the meeting with ‘Nushi-sama of the Lake’ was one of the most anticlimactic confrontations in the history of the Inu-gang…at least at first. The round little imp looked more like a toadstool than the fierce youkai Shima had made him out to be, but he did have a semi-reasonable claim on the girl’s hand. Upon learning of this, Shima stated that she had no right to be Nushi-sama’s bride because she had already given herself to Miroku when they met two years ago. At this point, Kagome wasn’t sure who was scarier: Nushi-sama who transformed into a vengeful giant catfish, or Sango who coldly refused to help Miroku deal with the situation. Seeing that they would get no assistance from the quarreling lovers, Kagome and Shippou leapt into action. The young fox distracted Nushi-sama momentarily with his kitsune-bi while Kagome fired an arrow. She had not aimed to kill, but the residual purity from the passing projectile was enough to burn the large but wimpy youkai, causing him to reverse his transformation. After a few firm but sympathetic words from Kagome, Nushi-sama slunk off back to the lake.

Or so she thought. He returned moments after the climax of the lover’s quarrel, when Sango had stormed off telling Miroku not to follow. Shima’s sudden scream alerted them to the danger, but by then it was too late to prevent Nushi-sama from flying off with her. Evidently not having a ‘pure girl’ for a bride wasn’t a deal-breaker for him. It did, however, earn him a proper clobbering from Miroku a few minutes later. Sango’s attempt to rescue Shima had resulted in her being dragged into the lake, with Nushi-sama promising to make her his mistress. The instant Kagome saw and heard an irate Miroku practically strangling the poor youkai for ‘taking his woman,’ she knew that he and his fiancée were going to be all right. After hearing the truth from Shima, that her claim to have slept with Miroku was only a lie to save her own skin, Kagome took Shippou inside and went to bed, leaving the quarreling lovers to resolve their issues in peace.

* * *

Sango sighed miserably as she gazed up at the stars, seated on a hillside not far from Shima’s home. She was glad that Miroku was here with her, sitting closely by her side but not touching, and equally grateful that he wasn’t saying anything. She was too ashamed of herself to speak at the moment.

In retrospect, she had completely overreacted to this entire situation. She had always suspected that Miroku had been with other women before; he was too much of a womanizer to still be a virgin, right? He had even met several women willing to lie with him during their quest, though some of those involved possession by youkai, which was surely a large portion of the reason why he’d never followed through. At any rate, her suspicion about his prior sexual encounters should have prepared her to deal with Shima and her family in a rational manner. But seeing a pretty girl so excited at the prospect of marrying her fiancé had caused her emotions to boil over, controlling her. The fact that Miroku hadn’t immediately rejected the proposal and informed Shima and her parents of his engagement hurt, a lot. Of course, the reasons for not doing so were obvious now; Miroku was caught off guard by the proposal and had wanted to let the girl and her family down easy. But at the time, Sango hadn’t been thinking clearly enough to realize his true motives. And when Shima confessed that she and Miroku had slept together…something inside Sango snapped. She’d been so absurdly furious that she refused to help save the lives and home of innocent people, forcing a kitsune child and a pregnant human to put themselves in harm’s way.

That was what shamed her the most. Yes, she’d unjustly suspected Miroku of wrongdoing. Yes, she’d fought too recklessly and gotten herself dragged into the lake by an overgrown catfish. But all of that paled in comparison to forcing Kagome and Shippou to fight Nushi-sama on their own. Thoughts of what might have happened to them would likely bother her for some time.

She suddenly felt gentle warmth and pressure against her knuckles, and glanced down to find Miroku’s hand covering her own. He smiled reassuringly, as if to say ‘it all worked out in the end, didn’t it?’ Sango’s conscience was not about to be soothed so easily, but she did accept her fiancé’s comfort. Scooting closer, she leaned her head against his shoulder, turning her hand over to grasp his own. They remained that way for some time, sitting together in silence. Finally, Miroku cleared his throat and spoke.

"Sango, I wish to apologize."

"N-No, Houshi-sama. It is I who should apologize to you."

He smiled sadly. "You are kind, Sango. Too much so for someone like me. I took advantage of your kindness and assumed that you would understand the situation without me having to say anything. Given my…history, that was unreasonable of me. For that, I am truly sorry."

"B-But I should have understood the situation! Instead, I assumed the worst. I should have trusted you."

"I have given you little reason to trust me," Miroku declared, the bitterness of his tone causing Sango to swallow her reply. He gazed at her, his eyes reflecting determination and fear, as though he knew what he had to say but dreaded the consequences. Sango squeezed his hand, in part to comfort him and in part to anchor her in suddenly stormy waters. Now intensely nervous, she held her breath and waited. Finally, Miroku broke his gaze away and began to speak.

"Sango, I am not a pure man. I have…lain with other women before. It is not something that I am proud of," he added quickly, as if fearing that she would stand and storm off. Sango doubted her legs would support her if she tried. Oddly, hearing his confession was not as painful as she feared. Perhaps it was the shame in his voice, or the way he was unable to look at her. Without any doubt, she believed his assertion that he took no pride in his past behavior. And to her, that was more important than whatever did or did not happen before they met.

"I will not make excuses for my behavior," Miroku continued. "These bad habits of mine have caused me more trouble than I can remember. They almost…caused me to lose you."

Sango gasped at those words, at the remorse in his eyes as he finally raised his gaze to meet hers. She knew what he was referring to—the incident with the village of youkai-possessed women in particular, and any number of other occasions where his behavior had either put her in danger or hampered the growth of their relationship, or both. Sango pulled his hand up and clasped it between both of her own, silently conveying a message from deep within her heart. _You have not lost me, Houshi-sama. Be true to me, and you never will._ Miroku smiled briefly, but then his expression became serious once more, and Sango realized that his confession was not yet complete.

"I wish with all my heart that I could take back what I have done, that when we join as man and wife it would be my first time as well as yours. But I cannot. I…I never expected to meet someone like you, Sango. If I had known, then I would have waited happily, just as I am waiting happily now. Just as I would wait happily for all eternity if I had to. Sango…please forgive me. Please tell me that you are still waiting with me."

Sango felt tears pool in the corners of her eyes, but blinked them back. Her lips curled up without her permission, but her facial muscles were unable to form words. But then, she had never been a woman of many words, and still she had found a man she wanted to spend the rest of her life with. A man whose roguish exterior could no longer conceal the unfathomably deep love he held for her. Moments like this reminded Sango of why she had agreed to become his wife in the first place. But she had no words to tell him any of this, and he was still waiting for an answer, so she leaned forward to show him. Miroku’s surprise meant that he didn’t quite meet her halfway.

Sango broke off the kiss before it became too heated, leaning against him once more. He heaved a blissful sigh and put his arm around her, suddenly the picture of contentment. Sango grinned and shook her head. In all honesty, she would need some time to fully accept what Miroku had told her tonight. But she would get there, and sooner rather than later. As Kagome had tried to tell her, the past was in the past. Only the future mattered.

Eventually, however, Sango’s reflections on the past turned contemplative. She became intensely curious about a certain aspect of Miroku’s story, and debated with herself whether she should ask. Her fiancé must have noticed the change in her mood, but his concerned query of what was wrong only caused Sango to firm her countenance and embrace her curiosity.

"So…how many women have you slept with, anyway?"

Miroku stiffened. He clearly hadn’t anticipated that particular question, which perhaps explained why he attempted to dodge it.

"Wh-Why do you ask?"

Sango rolled her eyes. _Because I want to know how much of a womanizer my future husband is—was_ , she corrected in her head. But that rationale seemed overly jealous, so she went with a more pragmatic reason.

"Because I’d like to know what the chances are of some woman showing up on my doorstep with a kid, claiming it to be yours."

"Ah," Miroku replied, his palpable relief confusing Sango until he spoke again. "There is no possibility of that happening."

"What? H-how can you be so sure?"

"Because whenever I was with a woman, I would always return a few moons later to see if she was carrying my child. I was irresponsible, true, but not completely without honor. And I genuinely did wish for an heir to carry on my legacy."

Sango’s shoulders slumped in relief. Her concern over his lovers and potential offspring appearing had initially been just a convenient fib, but as soon as it passed her lips she started to actually worry. It was nice to know that the concern was unfounded, though her relief did not dissuade her from pursuing her previous inquiry.

"I’m glad. Now answer the question."

"What question, my dear Sango?" Miroku asked innocently, the twinkle in his eye indicating his playfulness.

"You _know_ what question."

"I’m afraid I can’t recall. Would you kindly refresh my memory?"

Sango barely resisted the urge to bop him upside the head. _Ugh, I can’t believe he’s going to make me say it again!_

"How many women have you slept with?!"

"No more than a hundred."

"A _hundred?!_ "

Sango’s screech caused several nearby nighttime critters to flee for their lives and might even have woken the inhabitants of Shima’s home. No doubt the slap of hand on cheek or the sharp impact of bone on skull would have been just as loud, if Miroku had not thrown up his hands in a placating gesture.

"A joke! A joke!"

Sango was too irritated to speak, and simply glowered at him, her entire face aflame. Seeing this, Miroku put his finger to his chin as if actively pondering something.

"Hmmm…the actual figure is probably closer to a dozen...or two…or three…"

"Houshi-sama…" The grinding of Sango’s teeth was audible with every syllable.

"I can count the number on one hand," he stated, wiggling the fingers of his ‘wandering’ right hand for effect. Finally Sango relaxed somewhat. It wasn’t as bad as she feared, and the jerk was apparently done teasing her.

"Or perhaps I would need the thumb from my other hand as well…"

Sango groaned and smacked herself in the forehead. "Is there a reason why you can’t come up with an exact figure?"

Miroku laughed nervously and rubbed the back of his neck. "Well, let us simply say that Inuyasha and Kagome-sama are not the only ones who have experienced the cruel effects of sake on memory."

"Ah…you should have said something at the time. It might have made the two of them feel better."

"I believe that would have done more harm than good."

Sango thought about it, then nodded in agreement. _It certainly would not have been good for you and me, Houshi-sama_. She could only imagine how she would have reacted to that little revelation back then. In the worst case, it would have prevented them from being here together tonight on this peaceful hillside, which was something she intended to enjoy for a little longer. She leaned against him once more, and he wrapped his arm around her. The pair lapsed into companionable silence until moments later, Miroku’s soft chuckling caused Sango’s brow to furrow.

"What are you thinking about?" she asked, both curious and nervous about the answer.

"The future," he replied simply, but there was something in his tone which caused Sango’s cheeks to darken. If she looked at him, she was sure she’d see a mischievous glint in his eye. That he was thinking about sex did not surprise her. She did too, though she would never admit it out loud. But he was not thinking _only_ about sex, and in fact it probably did not dominate his thoughts when he reflected upon their future together. Sex was just one aspect of what they intended to share with each other, after all.

So yes, Miroku was still a letcher, and would likely always be. As long as he was _her_ lecher, Sango didn’t really mind.

* * *

"Hakago."

Kagome gasped, the sound of _that_ name passing through a stranger’s lips simultaneously filling her with anticipation and dread. It was two days after their stopover at Shima’s home. Ten minutes ago, the Inu-gang had reached a fairly sizeable town and decided to find lodging for the night. As per usual, they asked the innkeeper if he had heard any strange rumors. Most of the time the answer was ‘no,’ as people from smaller villages tended to mind their own business. But travelers came through the larger towns, leaving behind tales from faraway places in the minds of the inhabitants. The innkeeper was probably as good a person to ask as any in that regard. In this case, that theory was proven absolutely true.

A traveler from the north had recently spoken of a group of bandits raiding settlements in the countryside. That was nothing unusual, but the fact that they were also hitting military installations was odd. Even more remarkable was the rumor that this group was apparently led by a youkai, though the innkeeper supposed that it was probably just a man with above-average strength. But the traveler had been certain, and had even provided the supposed youkai’s name, which he said he’d heard from the friend of a soldier who’d escaped one of the attacks. A name which made this _real_ for Kagome. Rumors were unreliable, stories were changed and exaggerated as they passed from person to person, but that name could be no coincidence. At long last, they had a lead on Inuyasha’s whereabouts.

The Inu-gang retired for the evening, the atmosphere solemn despite the good news. For all understood how daunting the task laid out before them remained. The ‘north’ was a huge country, a vast area of land to search. Their target was small and highly mobile, and probably not interested in being found. But if secrecy was Hakago’s priority, then wouldn’t laying low make more sense? No one could understand why he was leading these bandits to attack villages and castles. The innkeeper had heard that already the local daimyo were meeting to discuss a joint venture to destroy the bandits. Why on Earth was Hakago making himself a target? Finally, Shippou spoke.

"Hakago is a kid, right?"

The others nodded, and Shippou swallowed the sudden lump in his throat. As a child himself, what he was about to say gave him the creeps.

"Well…kids like to play with toys, don’t they?"

Immediately, Kagome knew Shippou was right. She picked up the distraught kit and hugged him as he shivered. She couldn’t blame Shippou for being thoroughly creeped out. But Hakago was that kind of person. Even from her limited interaction with him, she saw him for who he really was. Not the mature, calculating adult he professed to be, but a bored child seeking stimulation. And what could be more stimulating for the offspring of one such as Naraku than playing with human lives?

Kagome did not sleep well that evening. Inuyasha was trapped inside his own body, which was apparently doing terrible things. Even if the hanyou still resisted, he was powerless to prevent Hakago’s bandits from murdering and raping as they pleased. How much innocent life would be snuffed out before Inuyasha’s eyes before he finally lost the will to resist? She could only hope that he would remember that he had a reason to live, a reason to fight.

It was the steady presence of that reason, their child’s aura, which finally allowed Kagome to slip into slumber. _Please, Inuyasha…hang on._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Chapters 343 to 345 is one of my favorite sections of the manga, so I just had to include it in this story where I’m recapping canon events with new twists. This part of the story isn’t very enjoyable to write, but light scenes like that help me get through it.


	39. So Close, Yet So Far

Kagome gasped just as Miroku froze in front of her, obviously sensing the same rapidly-approaching youkai signature that she did. The miko relaxed upon identifying the newcomer, though she did wish that Kouga would stop rushing in on them like that. He no longer possessed any shards of the Shikon no Tama for her to detect, and they currently lacked Inuyasha’s sensitive nose. It was amazing the difference those two things had made in the past in terms of providing advanced warning.

"Hey, Kagome."

Kouga whirled to a halt before her, snatching up her hands as he always did and favoring her with his customary easy grin. It almost caused Kagome to experience déjà vu, but a few details were inconsistent with her memories. His smile didn’t quite reach his eyes, nor was it as roguish as it usually was, not to mention the fact that he had declined to call her ‘his woman.’ It was as though there was no longer any substance behind this act; it was likely just a show to rile Inuyasha up. As if in confirmation, Kouga glanced around when it became clear that no angry rebuke was forthcoming.

"Where’s Inu-kurro?"

Kagome sighed and rubbed her temple. She really didn’t want to get into this with Kouga, but was reminded of her reasoning for confessing the truth to Kikyou. If Kouga and Inuyasha met, the wolf probably wouldn’t expect the hanyou to come after him with deadly intent. And that lack of awareness could be dangerous for him. So she would tell Kouga what he needed to know, albeit reluctantly. The wolf prince, however, misinterpreted her silence and spoke up before she found her words.

"What’s wrong? He drop dead or something?"

The question was serious enough—as opposed to excited—and afterwards Kouga grimaced as if realizing how insensitive it was. Those two things enabled Kagome to keep control of her temper and avoid snapping at him, which he didn’t deserve. The miko took a deep breath and tried to relax. Kouga was just being his usual self; the problem lay with her being irritable, which was understandable given the situation. But he wasn’t here to serve as her emotional punching bag, and he honestly had no idea what was going on. They hadn’t seen each other since Mount Hakurei, after Kikyou’s apparent demise. _Apparent_ being the key word.

"Sit with me, Kouga-kun. It’s a long story."

And so it was. To Kouga’s credit, he didn’t interrupt much, and his reactions were appropriate for a member of the opposite sex relegated to ‘friend’ status. He didn’t seem outwardly pleased by Inuyasha’s failures, or intrigued by the prospect of catching her on the rebound. Instead he exuded genuine sympathy for her, in addition to a healthy heaping of annoyance directed toward his former rival in love. His thoughts were probably running along the lines of, ‘she chooses him, and _this_ is what the idiot makes of it?!’ Kagome couldn’t fault that way of thinking, but she was glad that Kouga declined to rail against Inuyasha verbally in her presence. She could only take so much of that in one sitting, especially since some or all of it might very well be true.

"So you’re looking for him now," Kouga observed when the tale was over. "Are you sure that’s wise?" he asked, motioning to her visibly swollen belly.

"Don’t worry, Kouga-kun. I already promised my mother and my friends that I won’t stay on the road for too long. And I’m still a miko, remember? Plus, without the Shikon no Tama I don’t get into nearly as much trouble as I used to."

That seemed to at least somewhat mollify the wolf on that point; he instead turned to her companions and presented his next concern to them directly. "What will you humans be able to do if you find Inu-kurro? You gonna restrain him somehow?"

"We have our ways," Miroku and Sango responded as one, the small upturn at the corners of their lips suggesting that the duet had been unintentional. The gradual evolution of their ‘married couple’ mannerisms had amused Kagome to no end over the past few weeks. Their assurances failed to satisfy Kouga, however, who continued to regard them doubtfully until Sango arched her brow and spoke up.

"If you would like to verify the effectiveness of our techniques, Kouga, you and I could spar."

The wolf prince studied her for a moment, likely trying to determine if she was bluffing. Eventually he came the correct conclusion and snorted nonchalantly.

"I’ll pass. I have more important things to do today than playing around with a human."

Alarm bells went off in Kagome’s head at that comment, and sure enough, Miroku began to say something which would surely have pointed out that _all_ Kouga used to think about was ‘playing around’ with a human. Fortunately, Sango elbowed him in the ribs before he could get to the punch line, and Kouga missed the joke. The wolf’s comment, however, did provide the perfect opportunity for Kagome to change the subject, by asking him what ‘important things’ he was up to. Kouga immediately launched into a detailed account of everything he’d done since their last meeting—reuniting the scattered remnants of his tribe, claiming a new home range, fighting off invasions by other youkai, and so on, and so on.

And so on.

Who knew a wolf prince could be so talkative? In other circumstances, Kagome would gladly listen to every detail about his life. But they were following a concrete lead, and wasting valuable daylight. So eventually she excused herself to relieve her bladder—a very real need, actually—and upon returning declared that they should get going. Kouga accepted that easily enough, and they parted on amicable terms, the miko promising to be careful and the wolf prince reluctantly agreeing not to fight Inuyasha if they met. Instead he would only keep tabs on the hanyou and send his wolves and pack mates to alert the Inu-gang. Whether Kouga would actually keep that promise, Kagome couldn’t say, but she was reassured by the knowledge that she had done everything she could to keep him safe.

With daylight starting to wane, the Inu-gang resumed their journey to the next village in their chain of investigation. Kirara would have to carry the four of them for an hour or so in order to arrive before nightfall, but the fire-cat had shown no aversion to doing so for part of each day. They were trying to make the best time possible without exhausting her, because if Kagome did finally sense the Shikon no Tama and they had to pursue Hakago, who knew how long the chase would last?

* * *

The slow cracking of bone was music to Hakago’s ears, even muffled as it was by layers of muscle and skin. He enjoyed these moments the most, the periods of quiet where he could enjoy life’s simple pleasures in between his victim’s screams.

"Hold on, almost got it."

*Snap*

Masato screamed again, his cries no longer coherent. Initially he had pleaded for mercy, apologized for his transgressions and promised everlasting loyalty. Now his vocalizations stemmed from one thing and one thing only—pain. Excruciating, unfathomable agony which had already caused several of the battle-hardened mercenaries observing the scene to evacuate their stomachs. The rest watched in stunned silence, as their new leader held the man he’d replaced in a vice-like grip, slowly breaking every bone in his body.

Hakago had been waiting for this moment for a long time. Masato’s hostility toward him had never abated, though as days turned to weeks he’d begun to wonder if the coward was ever going to be brave enough to come after him. Evidently tonight he’d finally ingested enough ‘liquid courage’ to do so, in the most cowardly way possible. A pity for him that he was still sober enough to feel pain. And unfortunately, he wasn’t the smartest guy in the world to begin with. Only a fool would attempt to sneak up on a sleeping hanyou and stab him in the chest. Hakago had sensed his would-be assassin coming from at least a half-dozen meters away. But then, all of these men were fools, so the idiocy of Masato’s strategy was not all that surprising.

Hakago was mildly surprised that all of the other bandits were following his command to stay and watch their former leader be tortured to death. He’d expected at least one or two to protest, but not even Masato’s closest lackeys dared to stand up to him. Then again, this is what they had signed up for when they chose a youkai for a leader—a heartless, ruthless monster who cared nothing for human life, except for his underlings. In reality, Hakago cared nothing for them either, but they were either genuinely ignorant of this fact or chose to conveniently ignore it. The latter was surely easy to do when following obediently gained them mounds of currency and loot, which they could then convert into booze and prostitutes, the only things in the world which truly mattered to them.

*SNAP*

"Ooh, that was a good one," he muttered, his words drowned out by Masato’s screams. He reached for the opposite leg to see if the other femur would provide as pleasing a sound. Despite his original intentions, he probably wouldn’t break _every_ bone in Masato’s body. He’d only snapped a couple dozen so far, and was already growing tired of the man’s constant screaming. He’d probably break a few more, then have one of his underlings put the fool out of his misery. And so the story of one ‘Masato the Manslayer’ would come to its grisly end. The world would not miss him.

* * *

Hakago growled to himself as he kicked a stone down the path. How could he possibly last another day like this? Another day spent walking with his pitiful band of fools, listening to their idiot-speak and watching as they drank themselves unconscious at night. How long had he been with them? Weeks? Months? Every day blended into the next. And the smells! The more successful their group became, the more they reeked of booze and sweat and sex. Some days he wanted to plug his ears and nostrils just to get a reprieve. Not that the sight of them was much more appealing, but at least he could close his eyes at will.

They were currently on the road, and with him leading the way he didn’t have to look at them. He was, however, bored out of his freaking mind. He started to swing his arms randomly and vary his gait just to break up the monotony. A reasonable observer might compare the behavior to that of a fidgety child, but one of Hakago’s followers came up with a different theory.

"Whatsa matter, Boss? You got a bug up your ass?" Laughter.

"Nah," another called, "he probably went to see the same whore as ol’ Scratchy over there."

"Hey, she was half price!" said ‘Scratchy’ countered, scratching himself for good measure.

"Yeah, well with whores if you go too cheap you leave with somethin’ extra." More laughter.

Hakago hung his head. _Kill me now._ Why was he doing this again? He could leave these idiots any time he wanted to. It certainly wasn’t loyalty keeping him in their midst. After thinking about it for a moment, he supposed it was a desire to see things through to the end. He didn’t want to simply abandon his playthings; that would be anticlimactic. A modern observer might equate it to a child blowing up his old toy with an M-80 rather than giving it away, the former being infinitely more satisfying to the disturbed youngster.

So no, Hakago would not be ditching his followers without first ensuring that they received a proper sendoff. He would, however, begin seeking an opportunity to be rid of them, hopefully in spectacular fashion. As luck would have it, one such opportunity made itself known that very afternoon. In the past, when he caught any sign of the armies hunting them, he quickly led his men in making an escape. They were all mounted, so it was relatively easy to do so with a youkai’s senses giving them advanced notice. This time, however, when his sensitive ears picked up the distant sound of a thousand marching feet, he took the fork in the road which led toward the approaching enemy. The idiots behind him were too engrossed in their banter to notice the danger until a volley of arrows from the tree line took out a third of their number. The rest panicked and tried to flee back the way they had come, but the enemy cavalry cut them off, with the infantry coming up to fill in the gaps. Surrounded by hostile professional forces, the bandits turned to their leader with looks of anger and betrayal as well as fear.

"Boss," one of them demanded, "what gives? Why’d you lead us into a trap?"

"Yeah! Get us out of this mess!"

"Save us!"

Hakago silenced them with a short, barking cackle, cutting off his mirth only so he could say what needed to be said before the enemy army closed in to finish the job.

"Did you fools honestly believe that you were ever anything more than a source of amusement to me?"

"Bastard!" one of them cried, spurring his horse and charging with sword raised. One of Masato’s lackeys, if Hakago remembered correctly. He dug the balls of his feet into the ground, preparing for his counterstrike. The desire to kill flowed through him, dark and seductive. Inuyasha’s resistance rose to match, but it was not as potent as it usually was. The hanyou had weakened since the last time Hakago had tested him, and even Inuyasha could admit that these bandits deserved whatever was coming to them. This murdering, rapist thug didn’t deserve mercy. He was not worth fighting over. Inuyasha obviously disagreed, because his resistance did not yield completely. But it was no longer strong enough to prevent Hakago from doing as he pleased.

He leapt just as horse and man closed to within striking distance, plunging his claws into the bandit’s chest with enough force to knock the sword from his grasp. His momentum carried them high into the air, giving him ample time to gaze into the dying man’s despairing eyes. Then he plunged his other hand into the wound and literally tore the bastard in half. The two pieces landed with sickening _thunks_ , blood and viscera splattering in all directions. Hakago landed in a crouch in the middle of the carnage, taking a moment to enjoy the pungent smell of blood, the incomparable rush of killing a man with his own claws for the first time.

"Anyone else?" he asked, standing to gaze at the humans quivering all around him. Outlaw and soldier alike stared at him in shock, their spirits quelled by the pure joy radiating off of him. Several seconds passed in silence, and finally Hakago snorted in derision.

"No? Then stay here and die."

With that, he spun on his heels and took off at a sprint. The action broke the stupor hovering over the battlefield, and the infantry line in front of him made ready under the encouragement of their commanding officer. But Hakago calmly leapt over the tightly-packed troops and continued on his way, faster than any cavalry in the world could pursue. He had accomplished a major milestone today, and didn’t want to spoil his emotional high with a failed attempt to kill soldiers. Those men were innocent in Inuyasha’s eyes, and he would likely fight harder to spare them. For tonight, Hakago would content himself with the knowledge that slowly but surely, the hanyou’s resistance was weakening.

Soon, he would be able to kill anyone he wanted…even those Inuyasha loved.

* * *

Kagome kept her eyes either closed or focused on Sango’s back as they flew atop Kirara. The taijiya and her fiancé insisted that she sit between them for safety’s sake, even though her growing belly meant that Miroku increasingly had to lean forward awkwardly to maintain his grip on his staff, which per usual was held in front of Sango’s waist. This restricted the miko’s view of the world around her, but that was fine. Looking for signs of trouble wasn’t her job; no, her task was to stretch out her senses and scan for the presence of the Shikon no Tama. Her friends would use their eyes, but she had the best chance of locating Inuyasha using non-visual means.

None of them had enjoyed much luck so far, regardless of the search strategy they’d employed. They’d been crisscrossing feudal Japan for weeks, following one lead or another. ‘Hakago’s bandits’ were last sighted here, they sacked a village there, one of the pursing armies was encamped on the bank of this river… Half the time the leads turned out to be bogus, and the other half only led to further leads, half of which were also bogus. It was a depressing cycle. But today was different; today was the first time they’d heard a rumor that the bandits had been captured. Hence their haste as they flew at top speed toward the place where the victorious army was supposedly encamped. What they would find when they arrived, no one could say for sure. Kagome doubted that Hakago would be foolish enough to allow serious harm to come to his fancy new body, at least when facing a bunch of human soldiers. But would any of the soldiers be dead? Inuyasha would never allow this willingly, but how much had his resistance weakened over time? Was he still fighting against his captor?

"There it is!" Shippou cried suddenly, and Kagome leaned to the side in order to catch a glimpse of the military camp up ahead. The tents were draw up in neat rows, the largest one in the middle obviously belonging to the commander. Off to the right, one or two dozen shabby-looking men sat in a group, bound with rope and surrounded by guards. There was no sign of red robes or silver hair anywhere to be seen.

"Take us down, Kirara," Sango requested, and the fire-cat complied, swiftly descending to land a fair distance from the camp. Kagome almost demanded to know the reason for this, but was able to answer her own question. Obviously, landing in the midst of a force of armed men atop a large youkai was not a good idea, especially when the startled soldiers had likely fought against an individual of youkai blood recently. The idea was to appear as non-threatening as possible in order to avoid being treated as enemies. To that end, Kirara reverted to her kitten form. She and Shippou would remain behind as the three humans entered the camp, though both youkai would be ready to intervene if necessary.

That settled, the Inu-gang walked the rest of the way to the camp. With Kirara and Shippou safely hidden nearby, Miroku, Sango, and Kagome made their approach, with the monk leading the way as the group’s unofficial spokesman. It was agreed that Kagome would not be identified as a miko, since she was obviously pregnant. The majority of people in this day and age still believed that a miko could not maintain her power unless she was physically pure, and that a pregnant woman who still possessed said power was likely a dark miko. Instead, Kagome would pretend to be Miroku’s wife, though Sango did make it a point to somewhat playfully remind her fiancé that he would be allowed to take no ‘privileges’ in that regard. The monk could only sigh and shake his head.

One of the camp’s sentries stopped them as expected, demanding to know who they were and what business they had here. Miroku identified them as a monk and a taijiya—Sango had changed into her armour for this purpose—and replied that they were seeking to exterminate the hanyou plaguing the region. It was a believable story given their appearance, so the sentry sent someone to retrieve his commanding officer. They then had to repeat their story several more times until finally one of the general’s immediate subordinates bade them to follow as he led them through the camp. Sango’s slim form and skin-tight uniform drew quite a few heated gazes from the soldiers, but no one dared to vocalize their appreciation with a high-ranking officer escorting her. She undoubtedly noticed the attention but gave no outward sign of being uncomfortable; she was probably used to this sort of thing. For once Kagome was glad to not be wearing her school uniform; the maternity clothes she had recently switched to were much less revealing.

Soon they were ordered to wait outside the general’s tent, as the subordinate went inside. The general emerged a few moments later. He was a portly man, with a hard set to his face indicating that he’d spent most of his adult life with his jaw firmly clenched. But his eyes were not unkind; this was a hard taskmaster, a soldier through and through, but those who were not his enemies had no cause to fear him. At least, this was the impression Kagome received, which she hoped was correct.

"So you lot came here to hunt down that bastard hanyou, huh?" the general observed gruffly.

"Indeed we have, sir," Miroku replied, executing a formal bow. "We heard of the plight suffered by the people of this region, and journeyed here to lend our support."

The general eyed Sango for a moment, particularly the bone boomerang slung across her back. He was probably wondering how such a petite woman could wield such a large weapon, but eventually he shrugged, evidently deciding that their story was believable enough for him.

"We could have used your help this morning. We caught all the bandits, but the hanyou ran off."

"Did Inu—the hanyou attempt to engage your soldiers?"

"Nope. The damn coward just ran. Musta been afraid of us," the general declared, puffing out his chest a bit. "He did kill one of his own men though. Pretty gruesomely too. The rest of them surrendered easily enough after that."

"I see. Which direction did he flee in?"

"To the northeast," the general answered, pointing in said direction. "But he could be anywhere by now. My Master of Inquiries assures me that the bandits have no idea where the hanyou is."

As if on cue, a bloodcurdling scream rent the air; clearly the Master of Inquiries was not simply ‘inquiring’ to obtain the information he sought. Kagome visibly paled and put her hand to her mouth as nausea built in her stomach, unwittingly giving Miroku an excuse to bring this disappointing conversation to an end.

"If you will excuse us, sir. My wife’s condition—"

The general snorted and waved his hand dismissively. "I can’t believe you bring your pregnant wife with you to go after a youkai in the first place."

"We hail from a war-torn country, sir," Miroku replied, not rising to the intended insult. "Believe me, she is safest by my side."

Again the general shrugged. "Suit yourself. I wish you luck in finding the hanyou. If you do, bring him to me. My Lord will reward you handsomely, especially if he’s alive."

"We will certainly keep that in mind, sir," the monk declared, though Kagome could tell that his pleasant demeanor was an act. Fortunately, the general and his subordinates could not, so they were allowed to leave unmolested. Kagome nearly lost her lunch as the unfortunate bandit continued to scream in agony, and was very glad to depart from this place. Still, given the justice system of this time period, it was no surprise that such severe lawbreakers would be tortured. Their executions would not be humane either, but then neither was their behavior toward the innocent people of this area. They had known the potential consequences of their actions before they undertook them. In that sense, they deserved the punishments in store for them. At any rate, Kagome and her friends were not about to risk their own lives to offer the bandits a chance at salvation. They, like any other captured criminal in this era, would have to face harsh justice. Harsh it was, but justice also.

Unfortunately, none of that would help her find Inuyasha. Hakago was long gone. Unless he did something rumor-worthy, they were going to have to resume wandering the countryside in the hopes of accidentally running into him, or at least coming close enough for her to sense the Shikon no Tama. She ardently wished that she could extend her senses further, but it seemed that her range was maxed out. Japan was a relatively small island on the global scale of things, but there was still a lot of land to search. And now they had no leads to follow. Today had definitely been a setback, in more ways than one.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and turned to find Miroku gazing at her sympathetically.

"Please do not despair, Kagome-sama. It was not all bad news."

"How could you possibly hear anything good back there?" she snapped, but Miroku took no offense.

"I heard that Hakago did not try to harm any of the soldiers. Let’s be honest: most humans pose no problem for Inuyasha, even in groups." He didn’t need to add that two of the exceptions were standing right in front of her. "Hakago could have wiped out that whole army if he’d wanted to. So why did he only flee instead?"

Kagome’s eyes widened in understanding. "Because…maybe he still isn’t able to harm innocent people!"

"That is what I believe," Miroku confirmed. "A vile creature such as Hakago would not have left those soldiers unharmed except by necessity."

"Yes," Sango chimed in. "And even Houshi-sama or I would have been tempted to kill those bandits, given what they’ve done. It wouldn’t have taken much to get Inuyasha to do the same, especially since he’s probably witnessed some of their crimes."

Kagome sighed in relief, accepting her friends’ reassurances. Obviously nothing was certain, but their arguments made a lot of sense, and she trusted their judgment. At any rate, the only option left to them was to resume their journey.

As long as Inuyasha resisted, hope remained.

* * *

Kagome sniffled and blinked repeatedly as she gazed up at the dark sky overhead, trying unsuccessfully to hold in her tears. There was no moon, and even the stars appeared dim and lifeless. How had two months passed by so quickly? It seemed impossible, and yet, cold reality stared her in the face. It was time to return to the modern era.

Physically, she was ready to go home. Her stomach hurt. Her feet hurt. She found it difficult to sleep, was constantly fatigued, and her bladder was apparently the size of a peanut. All standard symptoms of the lovely period innocently known as the ‘third trimester.’ All of that she could put up with, if it wasn’t for the growing danger to herself and her baby. After several hours on the road, she’d tripped over her own swollen feet the other day and had nearly fallen stomach-first. She doubted that the quarter-youkai child inside of her was much more resilient at this stage than a human fetus. And no sane mother-to-be would spend her third trimester traipsing across the youkai-infested, violent countryside of feudal Japan during the era which would one day be known as the ‘Warring States Period.’ It was time to go home.

Kagome knew all this, but her heart ached. She kept thinking about the one time she’d actually sensed the Shikon no Tama. It had been fleeting, barely flirting with the edge of her sensing range for just a moment. To this day she wasn’t completely sure she had not imagined it. Regardless, she had been unable to pinpoint the exact direction, and their attempts to reestablish contact had ended in failure. With Hakago apparently laying low after his adventure with the bandits, that had been the only opportunity which presented itself. And she had missed it.

She sobbed, stifling herself to avoid waking the others. They could be awake anyway, for all she knew. Sango had spent the better part of the evening trying to console her, until finally she ordered the taijiya to turn in. No amount of reassuring words was going to make her feel better about this. Part of her wished that her friends would offer to continue the quest for a few more days, or maybe a couple weeks. But they had never acknowledged that as an option, despite her sorrow. The logical part of Kagome was grateful for that. They were great friends. If she wanted to cry and beg or refuse to go back, and make them drag her to the well kicking and screaming, they would play the villains to her mistreated heroine without complaint. She would try not to do that to them. Her resolve would undoubtedly be tested over the coming days as they journeyed back to Kaede’s village, but she would remember that this was the best thing for her baby, the tiny, vulnerable life inside of her. And with that in mind, she would abandon Inuyasha to his fate.

There was still hope, she supposed. Inuyasha could somehow break free of Hakago on his own, though that was unlikely. Almost as unlikely as stumbling across him on the way back to the village. Miroku and Sango had offered to go out searching for him on their own, but Kagome would have none of that. They had delayed their happiness long enough, and without her ability to sense the Shikon no Tama their odds of tracking Hakago down were slim to none. Besides, if there was one thing Kagome was looking forward to, it was Miroku and Sango’s wedding. That thought brought a smile to her face, despite her melancholy. If she had been forced to choose between a happy relationship with Inuyasha and the monk and taijiya falling in love and getting married, she would have chosen the latter. They were a beacon of pure light in her otherwise dreary world; as long as she could see it, she would never truly despair.

Kirara transformed suddenly with a snarl, immediately rousing the rest of the group. Sango hastily threw some fresh wood on the fire, but even the rising flames did not afford them much visibility in the black night.

"What is it?" Kagome demanded, stretching out her senses even as she posed the question.

"This aura feels like Ka—"

Miroku cut himself off as his eyes widened in alarm. Kagome also sensed the danger, but it was too late to do anything about it. A body dropped from the sky to land directly behind her, a strong arm wrapping around her torso as the other held something against her neck. It was not the blade of a knife, but in this case the fan was just as deadly.

"Hello, Kagome," Kagura sneered, her voice dripping with malice. "Sesshoumaru said I’d find you here. It’s been a long time."

"Kagura!" Miroku cried. "Let her go!"

"Relax, monk. I don’t give a shit about this bitch. Just tell Inuyasha to get his ass out here. I’ve got a bone to pick with him."

"Inuyasha’s not here! He—"

"Don’t lie to me! That bastard hanyou is the only one I want, but if he’s too much of a coward to face me, then I’ll slaughter every last one of you!"

"Kagura," Kagome spoke softly, her tone stilling the tongues of every other person in the camp. She could feel the tension in Kagura’s body, how violently her hand was shaking. If she was holding a knife, Kagome would worry about having her throat sliced by accident. But the wind sorceress would have to summon her youki to do her harm, which would not happen. Despite Kagura’s threats, Kagome could tell that she didn’t truly wish to hurt any of them. She was beyond furious, but the miko sensed that she could still be reasoned with.

"You have your fan at my throat," she observed calmly. "Do you honestly believe that Inuyasha would ignore such a threat to me and his unborn child? Have you ever known him to be such a coward?" Kagura faltered at this, her fan lowering slightly. Still, Kagome made no move to escape until the threat was completely dropped.

"Now release me," she ordered, summoning just enough of her miko power to remind her captor of who she was. _I am the miko who slayed Naraku. And you, Kagura, will back off if you value your life._

The wind sorceress had probably not developed telepathy since they last met, but she did comply with Kagome’s demand after a brief hesitation. She backed up a few steps, eyeing the gathering warily as the miko turned to face her.

"He’s really not here?"

Kagome shook her head, lowering her eyes in shame. Finally understanding dawned on Kagura.

"Wait…he didn’t lose to Hakago, did he?!" After receiving a small nod in confirmation, the wind sorceress swore aloud. "Well, that’s just great, isn’t it? Not only is that bastard infant still alive, but I can’t make Inuyasha answer for what he did to me!"

"What he _almost_ did to you," Kagome retorted. She sympathized with Kagura; based on what her friends had told her, it must have been a truly frightening experience. But that’s all it was—Kagura had suffered fear, and nothing more. There were much worse things in this world.

" _Excuse_ me?" Kagura demanded.

"Inuyasha released you, did he not?"

"Yeah, after scaring me half to death!"

Kagome took a deep breath to reign in her temper. She could totally tear Kagura a new one here, but she would feel guilty afterwards. And it would be counter-productive; she needed every ally she could get right now.

"Look, Kagura, I know you’re angry at Inuyasha. You have every right to be. But he _did_ let you go. He spared you from the fate that he’s now suffering. If that’s not a noble gesture, then I don’t know what is. If you give him a chance to apologize, I’m sure you won’t feel so angry at him anymore."

Kagura growled in annoyance, but her gaze softened slightly and Kagome knew that her message had gotten through. Huffing, Kagura pulled out her feather and soared up into the air.

"WAIT!!!" Kagome screamed, drawing the wind sorceress to a reluctant halt.

"What?"

"I…" she trailed off, mulling over her words. But her audience was waiting impatiently, so she hastily cobbled together an opening sentence. "So you’re traveling with Sesshoumaru, Kagura?"

"Wh-What’s it to you? I’m a free woman. I can travel with whomever I please," the wind sorceress replied flippantly.

"Will you tell Sesshoumaru about Inuyasha? In case he and Hakago run into each other, I wouldn’t want any harm to come to your…companion."

Kagura snorted, ignoring the unasked question about her relationship with the stoic daiyoukai. "Of course I’ll tell him. Not that Inuyasha or Hakago or whoever the hell he is stands any chance against Sesshoumaru."

Kagome wisely hid her mild amusement at the sense of admiration in Kagura’s tone as she spoke of Sesshoumaru. _A free woman, indeed_. But there was a much more important subject to discuss.

"Will you relay a message to Sesshoumaru for me?"

Kagura sighed. "Make it quick."

"Please ask him…to spare Inuyasha. I can drive Hakago out of him, I _know_ I can, but not if Inuyasha is…is… Please, _please_ ask Sesshoumaru to bring him to me alive. I’ll do anything. I’ll—"

"All right, all right, I’ll freaking tell him," Kagura interrupted irritably, clearly moved by Kagome’s plea and not happy about it. "No promises though," she declared. "You know how Sesshoumaru is."

"Yes, I know…but he may be my best hope."

Kagura sighed and swore under her breath. Then she soared into the night, vanishing as quickly as she’d appeared. Kagome heaved a shuddering breath and sank to the ground, emotionally drained. Sango helped her back to bed, but she knew she would be getting no sleep tonight. Her mind was too preoccupied with what could happen if Sesshoumaru and Hakago met.

Sesshoumaru had a good side, once which had become more prevalent in recent months. No daiyoukai who would voluntarily care for a young human girl could be said to be completely lacking in compassion. But he could also be violent, arrogant to a fault, and incredibly self-centered. And if the two sons of the Inu-no-Taisho met on the field of battle once more, which Sesshoumaru emerged might very well determine whether she ever saw Inuyasha alive again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Does Hakago remind anyone else of Sid Phillips from Toy Story? That’s where the M-80 reference came from. It’s been so long since I saw that movie, but I still remember him vividly. 
> 
> Sorry if this seemed rushed, but I never had very much planned for this portion of the story. And I know you guys don’t want to suffer through a bunch of filler chapters, so we move this along!


	40. Brotherly Love

"Kagura-sama, look! I turned Jaken-sama into a flower yosei!"

Kagura grinned and shook her head. To say that Rin had warmed up to her would be an understatement. Nowadays it was a rare occurrence when the little girl left her alone. Not that she minded; to the contrary, she had come to enjoy her time with the precocious youngster. Rin was always ready with a bright smile, and her constant exuberance never failed to raise Kagura’s spirits. Especially since she liked to play with Jaken, ‘play’ being the operative word though the toad would probably use ‘torture’ instead. His head was currently adorned with a floral crown which Rin had spent the better part of the morning assembling. Though Kagura wasn’t sure about the girl’s description of her unwilling model. _He’s the ugliest damn yosei I’ve ever heard of._

Jaken reacted with his typical frustrated bluster, flinging the crown to the ground and stomping on it a couple times for good measure. With Sesshoumaru gone, the little toad felt that he could get away with this, even though Rin’s expression turned downtrodden and her bottom lip quivered. He should have known better.

Unfolding her fan, Kagura wielded it with natural grace, manipulating the wind with short, precise motions. Jaken screamed in surprise as a whirlwind rose around him, picking up flowers from the field and imprisoning him within a swirling vortex of brightly colored petals. He swung his staff ineffectually, but knew better than to deploy his flame attack with Rin nearby. If he did that, Kagura had every intention of taking that staff and shoving it up his ass. Literally.

A targeted gust of wind ripped the staff from his hands and sent it flying. Another silenced his outraged protests by yanking his hat down to cover his beak-like mouth. And for the final touch, Kagura assembled a solid tower of flowers at least a half dozen meters tall and dropped it on his head. Her wind maintained the tower’s form but did nothing to support its weight, so Jaken stumbled and swayed under the pressure. He pulled the hat away from his mouth and demanded that she stop this at once. So, after a few more seconds of torment, she did just that. The imp’s scream as the entire mass of flowers collapsed on him was most satisfying.

Rin’s joyous laughter brought a bright smile to Kagura’s face. She found the girl rolling on the ground, kicking her feet with uncontrollable mirth. Jaken crawled out of the side of his floral mound moments later, dusting himself off with feigned dignity. But a few petals still clung to his clothing, the sight of which caused Rin to laugh even harder. Jaken was not amused, however, and slunk off to be alone for a while. That was fine with Kagura. Perhaps next time he would think twice about making Rin sad.

Kagura flopped down on the grass next to the still giggling girl and waited for her to regain her composure. She gazed up into the sky and smiled, each of Rin’s melodious notes like sweet birdsong to her ears. Finally the girl’s mirth subsided, and she sat up, staring after Jaken anxiously.

"Is Jaken-sama mad?"

Kagura snorted. "He’s always mad about something. It was funny, right?"

Rin snickered a bit at that. "Yeah. Your fan is so cool. I wish I could do that."

"Well, I wish I could make flower crowns like you. Will you make one for me?"

Rin’s eyes lit up and she set to excitedly running about the field gathering her building materials. Kagura chuckled and shook her head. She was going to look absolutely ridiculous in whatever Rin put together, and would probably have to wear it for a week to avoid hurting her feelings, but somehow she didn’t mind. She did wonder what Sesshoumaru would say about it, or rather, what his eyes would say. His mouth would likely say what it usually did—nothing.

Kagura’s expression turned contemplative, but her soft smile remained. Sesshoumaru remained somewhat of an enigma, but one she was ever so slowly beginning to unravel. Most of the time he carried himself in silence, communicating with body language or not at all. But she had learned to read his subtle signals, even after only a few weeks of traveling together. For example, when he was not averse to conversing around the campfire at night, he would sit with just a slightly more open stance than usual. That was her cue to engage him in conversation. Most of the time it was pretty one-sided, but on a couple occasions he had shared with her stories of his past. She lived for those moments, when Sesshoumaru lowered his stoic façade just a little and opened up to her. It made her feel special, since in all likelihood he had never shared such intimacy with anyone, perhaps not even his own parents. And especially not Jaken, which was probably one of the reasons why the imp resented her so much.

But that was fine; she wasn’t very fond of Jaken either. She could tolerate him in order to travel with Sesshoumaru and Rin, but she didn’t think they would ever like each other. For the first week or so, he had berated her repeatedly for not referring to Sesshoumaru with an honorific, even in his presence. The daiyoukai never said anything though, one way or the other. Finally she gathered up the courage to ask him directly. An affirmative answer would have changed the nature of their relationship, and Sesshoumaru knew it. But instead of demanding formality from her, he had simply replied that it was not necessary, embracing the more casual nature of their relationship in his own way. Jaken nearly had a conniption, but he had shut up about the honorific at least. Though it didn’t take him long to find something else to harp on, whether it be her crude mannerisms, ‘unladylike’ behavior, or just some bullshit he made up because he didn’t like her. After a while, it all became white noise to Kagura. Sesshoumaru didn’t mind any of her flaws, imagined or otherwise, and that was all that mattered to her. Especially when she was the only one he allowed to be so familiar with him. Jaken’s own experiment of addressing his master without an honorific had ended with Sesshoumaru’s boot planted in his face.

Kagura grinned at the memory and lay down in the grass, lulled by Rin’s gentle humming as she went about her business. Yes, life was good. She was grateful for each day. Initially, she had spent her time wandering the skies, searching for…well, she hadn’t really known what she was searching for at the time. Now, she knew that she had found it. What had started as a brief rendezvous to ask if Sesshoumaru knew where his bastard half-brother was had quickly turned into a steady companionship. She’d been tired of being alone, and it had taken her only a few more hours of flying off by herself for her to realize that she was making huge mistake. She’d tracked Sesshoumaru’s down, and had been by his side ever since. The daiyoukai had never expressly given her permission to stay, but he had never asked her to leave either. His behavior since that first encounter told her all she needed to know about his feelings.

Well, perhaps not _all_ she needed to know. There was, after all, plenty to wonder about in that regard. What exactly was she to Sesshoumaru? It had occurred to her that she was a fully matured—and in her own opinion quite attractive—woman, who had never shared relations with a man. It was something she wanted to experience someday, but she was in no hurry. Right now, she was simply enjoying the freedom of doing what she wanted, and traveling with whom she pleased. Hopefully that level of intimacy would come someday. It was obvious to her that she desired Sesshoumaru in that manner, and he probably knew it too. Perhaps he was afraid to open himself up so far, to be so vulnerable, or perhaps he simply wasn’t ready to take a mate. Either way, there was no rush. They both had centuries left to live, after all.

If Kagura was sure of one thing, it was that whatever held Sesshoumaru back did not originate from her. It was not _her_ problem; it was his. That issue had been settled very early in their journey together, on the second day, in fact. He had been cold to her for a span of about twenty-four solid hours, though in retrospect he had simply been repressing his residual anger toward her—she had failed to protect Rin from Naraku as promised, after all. They cleared the air about _that_ little issue later that same evening, in a conversation which became quite heated even from the daiyoukai’s side. But initially, his hostility gave her the impression that he was repulsed by her scent, which was still so similar to that of Naraku. It was an insecurity she’d always held, that people would be unable to see her as her own person, that they would always view her as an incarnation of Naraku and nothing more. Finally she had confronted Sesshoumaru about it, prepared to storm off with dignity if her fears proved correct. The daiyoukai’s last image of her would be of a strong woman, no matter how she vented her emotions afterwards, while she was alone.

Instead Sesshoumaru blinked at her, showing genuine surprise for a brief moment. It was as if he realized for the first time what his unnatural coldness was doing to her. So when she demanded to know whether her scent repulsed him, he responded with four words she would never forget as long as she lived.

"You are not Naraku."

It was such a simple statement, yet it did so much more than answer the question she had voiced. Instead, it addressed the unspoken insecurities she tried so hard to hide. Sesshoumaru _did_ see her as her own person, and didn’t care that she smelled like a hated enemy. It probably bothered him to some degree, at least at first, but not enough to cause him to drive her away. She never caught him wrinkling his nose around her, so either he was very discreet or her scent was not as onerous as she feared. Either way, she had put those insecurities to rest. And as her journey with Sesshoumaru continued, she experienced a new level of freedom, more incredible than anything she’d ever felt before. She was happy, truly happy.

That realization always made her wonder if she deserved it. With all of the terrible things she’d done, was it right for her to be happy? Was she allowed to enjoy life when she had failed to save her own sister? Then she would recall the final visit Kanna’s spirit had paid to her in that field, and her heavy heart would lighten. Her sister’s bright smile said it all. Kanna wanted her to be happy, to live the life she had always longed for. It was a desire she could not ignore. And if she had not yet done enough good in the world to atone for the sins of her past, then she still had centuries to rectify the imbalance. One day at a time. She was living for—

Kagura bolted upright, her hands automatically grasping her fan and feather respectively, as she turned her searching gaze to the west. For just an instant, she had felt a foreign presence brushing against her youki, likely someone lurking beneath the distant trees. It vanished before she could identify the owner, but it had seemed familiar, and the hairs on the back of her neck instantly stood on end. Stretching out her senses now proved fruitless, as the mysterious intruder had obviously moved away. Never had she more ardently wished for Sesshoumaru’s sense of smell. A cold, foreboding wind blew in, causing Kagura to shiver. Her intuition supplied one possible scenario which seemed more likely than the rest, but she prayed that she was wrong. She had hoped for this confrontation, but now that the time might have arrived, she felt only dread. She moved closer to Rin and spent the remainder of the afternoon near her side and on high alert, while trying to avoid alarming the girl. In this she succeeded; if Rin noticed her distraction, she was too innocent to guess the reason behind it.

Sesshoumaru returned just as the sun was beginning to set below the western horizon, much to Kagura’s relief. Her night vision wasn’t much better than a human’s; the only way she could hope to keep Rin truly safe would be to transform her feather and keep the girl airborne until dawn. With Sesshoumaru here now, she could finally relax a bit. He hadn’t expected to return before nightfall, so what she liked to call his ‘daiyoukai business’ must have gone well. Today he’d been asked to mediate between two rival youkai clans, though it was likely that he’d done more ordering people around than actual mediating. But as long as the two clans didn’t continue to kill each other, why should it matter how peace was attained? That’s what they got for involving an arbitrator who was used to having his commands followed without question. Now that Naraku was dead and he’d unofficially given up his claim on Tetsusaiga, Sesshoumaru had started to resume some of the duties he’d inherited from his father, duties which he had selfishly ignored while hunting enemies and heirlooms. Kagura for one was glad to see the change. It was much easier to imagine a future with the widely-respected daiyoukai of the western lands than a loner who shunned the rest of the world as inferior to him and pined after his half-brother’s inheritance.

Sesshoumaru’s gaze lingered on her, his eyes widening just slightly. Kagura’s cheeks tinted under the scrutiny, but she honestly couldn’t tell if he thought she looked like a fool in her enormous floral crown or if she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen. She actually found herself leaning toward the latter, which did not help her composure one bit. But Sesshoumaru seemed to sense that there was more to her nervousness than mere embarrassment, and his expression turned serious—well, more serious than usual.

"What is it?" he asked.

"I…I sensed someone earlier," Kagura replied after a brief mental scramble. "I thought it might have been—"

"Inuyasha," Sesshoumaru declared. It was not a question. At her curious look, he elaborated. "I caught his scent as I returned. He is in the area. He has likely been waiting for this Sesshoumaru." The daiyoukai’s eyes narrowed, his formidable youki flaring around him. "It is a decision this ‘Hakago’ person will come to regret. Kagura, take Rin on your feather and do not come down for any reason."

The wind sorceress nodded automatically, knowing better than to argue. If Hakago wanted to pick a fight with her, she would go after him with everything she had. But if that had been his goal, he could have attacked her this afternoon. The only theory which made any sense was Sesshoumaru’s. Therefore, this was not her fight. She didn’t want Sesshoumaru fighting her battles for her, so she would not interfere with his. _Unless it’s absolutely necessary,_ she added in her head, wisely keeping that thought to herself. She grabbed Rin and took off on her feather, whispering a few soothing words to reassure the frightened girl. The two of them hovered several dozen meters over the potential battlefield, and waited.

Hakago did not delay his approach for long. Just minutes later Kagura spotted him across the field, striding confidently forward. And when she saw the infant’s typical arrogant smirk splayed across Inuyasha’s features, she had to clench her fist and grit her teeth in order to refrain from flying over and tearing him a new one. Some might call her grudge against the hanyou petty—Kagome obviously thought it was—but Kagura begged to differ. She had been helpless for most of her life, completely at the mercy of the whims of a deranged master. And just when she had gained her freedom, and started to feel like an actual person for the first time in her life, Inuyasha had gone and made her feel completely helpless all over again. No one who had never been a slave could possibly understand how devastating that was. The memory still haunted her to this day. So no, she would not simply let the matter go as Kagome would like her to. She would, however, give Inuyasha a chance to apologize. If he did a damn good job with his groveling, and satisfied her desire for revenge, then and only then would she forgive him.

But that was a concern which she needed to push to the back of her mind. It assumed that Sesshoumaru would prevail in this fight, and that Hakago could be defeated without killing his host, neither of which were guaranteed. Not even the former, as loath as she was to admit it. Sesshoumaru had acted as confidently as ever, but she knew him well enough now to perceive the small element of doubt he harbored. He knew what his own abilities were, but what Hakago could do with Inuyasha’s body…that was the mystery.

Hakago stopped before Sesshoumaru, and the two sons of the Inu no Taisho sized each other up from a distance of less than a dozen meters. Then, after a brief conversation which Kagura could not quite make out over the deafening sound of her own pounding heartbeat, Hakago charged.

* * *

Hakago swore under his breath. He’d caught Kagura’s scent on the breeze, but in his excitement he’d wandered too close and the wind sorceress had sensed his youki. Now she was on high alert, ready to grab the little girl and take to the air at a moment’s notice. His chance to sneak up on her and force her to fight him on the ground was lost. Although, perhaps that was for the best. That young girl did look awfully familiar… _That’s Sesshoumaru’s little brat!_ He recalled how protective of her the daiyoukai had become during the battle against Naraku. The cold, calculating Sesshoumaru he’d met just prior did not comport with the desperate man who’d fought like a father trying to save his own daughter. His goal had completely shifted from the destruction of Naraku to the single-minded desire to save his precious ‘Rin.’ And the way he’d shouted her name…it was as though her death would hurt him more than anything an enemy could do to his physical form.

Clearly there was more to Sesshoumaru than met the eye, and what the daiyoukai tried to hide might be an exploitable weakness. It was an intriguing possibility, far more interesting than a potential battle against Kagura. He knew what the wind sorceress was, and that she stood no chance of defeating him on her own. He could dodge or repulse all of her aerial attacks and hopefully close to within his own striking range. The only way she would survive would be if she turned tail and ran. Sesshoumaru, on the other hand, was one of the most powerful youkai in existence—his own impression and Inuyasha’s memories told him as much. But those same memories revealed that the daiyoukai was far from invincible. If someone as mentally weak as Inuyasha could manage to lop off Sesshoumaru’s arm and nearly blow him away with the Kaze no Kizu on separate occasions, then clearly the daiyoukai was not that strong. Goose bumps rose on Hakago’s skin at the thought of testing Sesshoumaru’s strength for himself. It was a battle which he was not sure he could win, a thrilling prospect in and of itself. He was also uncertain that Inuyasha would allow him to kill his only sibling, despite the grudge the hanyou held. But the potential rewards were great. If he could slay Sesshoumaru, not only would it prove his own strength, but it would be a major blow to his host’s resistance and a tremendous step toward complete autonomy over this body.

After contemplating carefully for several minutes, Hakago made his decision. He would wait for Sesshoumaru. Based on Inuyasha’s memories and his own experiences with this body, he put his chances of winning at well over fifty percent. Sesshoumaru surely held the opposite opinion, but could not possibly know what Hakago was capable of in the form of his half-brother. He was without a doubt more dangerous than Inuyasha had ever been. Given that assessment, he determined that the risks were worth the rewards. Either way, one of them was going to have his delusions of strength shattered today. And if that unfortunate individual turned out to be him, then at least he would have one hell of an entertaining final battle.

But he didn’t think that would be the case. If he wasn’t reasonably assured of victory, he would not seek battle. He was neither stupid nor suicidal. But he was excited, his heart already beating rapidly in anticipation of Sesshoumaru’s return. He hoped the daiyoukai didn’t make him wait too long. In the meantime, he would probe Inuyasha’s memories in greater detail, and practice some tactics which might prove useful. Preparation might be the difference between victory and defeat, and he had some time to burn.

Not too much time, as it turned out. Just before sunset, the flaring of Sesshoumaru’s aura announced his return. _He’s summoning me,_ Hakago realized. _Heh, Sesshoumaru, your arrogance will be your downfall._ Nevertheless, he resisted the urge to sprint to his destination. He had waited hours for his opponent; now the daiyoukai could wait for him. He approached with a cool, confident saunter, taking several minutes to move a distance which could have been crossed in a matter of seconds. He didn’t even try to conceal his smirk, as he drank in Kagura’s impotent rage and Rin’s fear. Sesshoumaru appeared as composed as ever on the outside, but Hakago didn’t believe for an instant that his emotions were nearly as calm. He wondered how long it would take for that stoic façade to crack, and had every intention of finding out. Finally he came to a halt before his opponent, each of them sizing the other up for a few moments.

"So, I suppose you’ve realized who I am by now," he observed, recalling how easily Sesshoumaru had identified him as the ‘spawn of Naraku’ while he was inside Kagome.

"Indeed," the daiyoukai replied.

Hakago chuckled. "As conversational as ever, I see. Well, I imagine you will do most of your communicating through your sword."

"It is doubtful that this Sesshoumaru will even be required to draw his blade to deal with a mongrel whelp such as yourself."

"Ah, still with that superiority complex. Good! It will make it that much sweeter when I tear you to pieces!"

Hakago charged, moving at great speed but not recklessly so. If Sesshoumaru drew his sword, he wanted the opportunity to alter his course. He didn’t much relish the thought of bludgeoning himself against Tokijin’s kenatsu as full-youkai Inuyasha had done in the past. To his surprise, however, Sesshoumaru made no move to reach for his blade. Instead, he materialized his youki whip and with a flick of his wrist sent the thin, glowing strand carving through the air with eye-gouging force. Hakago ducked his head just in time, his ears lowering against the angry burst of youki from the near miss. He stumbled back, shielding his face with his arms as the whip struck repeatedly in rapid succession. It was more of an irritant than a danger now that he knew what was coming, but it caused cold fury to settle in his belly. He did not much appreciate being whipped like a common dog.

Deciding to do something about it, Hakago slipped his right hand inside his robes and grasped the Shikon no Tama. Then he waited, still shielding his head with his left arm. When one of Sesshoumaru’s strikes traced a path which was slightly too predictable, he lashed out and snatched the end of the whip out of the air. A pained growl emanated from his throat as the concentrated youki burned the flesh of his hand, but he bore it, locking eyes with his enemy as he brought his other hand to the whip and summoned the power of the Shikon no Tama. Within moments, the overstressed strand of youki shattered into a thousand shards which quickly dispersed into nothingness. Hakago replaced the Shikon no Tama inside his robes and tested his left hand, clenching and unclenching the fingers. The wounds were mostly superficial; he had probably lost a little functionality, but nothing more. It was worth it for the satisfaction of destroying that damn whip. _Let that bastard look down on me now!_

He was. Sesshoumaru’s opinion of him had obviously not increased significantly, judging by the bored and disdainful look gracing his features. His hand lowered to his side, as if in mocking derision for a waste of effort. Hakago felt his brow twitch in annoyance.

"You’re going to have to do better than that, Sesshoumaru!" he exclaimed.

"That was child’s play, _boy._ And you were still helpless against it until you used that jewel. Try fighting with your own strength, so that you may at least die with a speck of dignity."

Hakago barked out a laugh. "A hypocrite to the end, eh Sesshoumaru? Or will you next tell me that your beloved sword, Tokijin, was _not_ forged from my brother Goshinki’s fangs?"

"This Sesshoumaru has mastered Tokijin," the daiyoukai replied evenly, though Hakago did note the slight narrowing of his eyes.

"And I have mastered the Shikon no Tama," he replied. "Just as I have mastered your brother’s bo—"

"You have mastered nothing," Sesshoumaru snarled, his composure wavering for just a moment. Hakago smirked. _Ah, how interesting. No matter what he says, me possessing Inuyasha’s body is a sore spot with him._ As if in confirmation, the daiyoukai’s claws began to glow a menacing shade of green, the telltale sign of his dokkaso. Sesshoumaru was apparently finished with ‘child’s play.’

This time the daiyoukai took the initiative, launching himself into a blur which suddenly materialized less than a meter in front of Hakago’s shocked form. Sesshoumaru aimed for his head once again, but his target’s reflexes were good enough to ensure that only a few strands of hair were cut. Hakago countered with an upward slash which Sesshoumaru deftly avoided. The next phase of the battle was a frenzy of motion, claws and youki slicing through the air in a violently beautiful spectacle. Hakago could not be sure exactly how much time it actually took, but it surely felt longer than it was. His main concern was preventing Sesshoumaru from landing a clean hit with dokkaso. His body could handle minor scratches, and the small amounts of poison injected with them. In fact, Inuyasha’s fire-rat deflected many near misses where Sesshoumaru’s claws would otherwise have grazed his flesh. But if he suffered a significant wound, even one which would normally not hinder him very much physically, the large influx of poison would force him to fight in a weakened state, a condition which would likely spell the end of him.

Fortunately, Hakago held one crucial advantage which Sesshoumaru could not hope to match—his left arm. Having two arms and two sets of claws made all the difference in the world. It allowed him to deal with the daiyoukai’s superior speed and combat experience. Because no matter what Sesshoumaru did, when he attacked there was always a necessary delay for him to retract his arm and prepare for the next strike. Hakago could focus solely on dodging his opponent’s single weapon, and counterattack when the opportunity presented itself. If Sesshoumaru still had both arms, he would probably be in big trouble. But then, if Sesshoumaru had both arms, he likely wouldn’t have picked this fight in the first place. Again, he was neither stupid nor suicidal.

He was, however, engaged in the fight of his life. It was just as intense as the final battle against Naraku, but in a different way. Sesshoumaru was relentless, never standing still for an instant, and even in evading his enemy’s attacks, his intent was always aggressive. It was as though fatigue was a foreign concept to him. Hakago certainly wasn’t in dire straits in that regard, but he was at least breathing somewhat heavily and sweating a bit. Nevertheless, the former infant found himself savoring every moment of mortal combat. Nothing in life had ever been this much fun. And now, it was finally time to demonstrate to his opponent just how far he’d come in mastering Inuyasha’s body.

The first time he used Sankon Tetsusou, Sesshoumaru reacted with understandable surprise. Beyond the fact that the ‘spawn of Naraku’ was able to utilize Inuyasha’s youki in such a manner, that an enemy had enough confidence to hold back such an ability for so long must have come as a real shock. The previously unflappable daiyoukai hesitated for barely a fraction of a second, but that was all the opening Hakago needed. He had timed the Sankon Tetsusou for maximum effect, and followed up immediately in anticipation of the desired hesitation. His right hand streaked in toward Sesshoumaru’s chest, his fingers trailing golden youki as they passed the point of no return, becoming unavoidable even for the daiyoukai. Sesshoumaru twisted his body to take the blow on his armour, but the metal cracked and shattered, allowing Hakago to sink his claws into the flesh underneath. Sesshoumaru grunted as the scent of his own blood filled the air, but withdrew before his opponent’s other hand could be brought to bear. He moved back with measured leaps, putting some distance between them.

Hakago let him go, knowing that to follow recklessly would be to court death. Sesshoumaru’s armour had deflected his strike enough so that the resulting injury could reasonably be called a ‘flesh wound.’ A significant blow, to be sure, but not one which would seriously hinder the daiyoukai. It had, however, seriously irritated him, if his formidable glare was any indication. And that was _exactly_ what Hakago wanted. It was time to play a little poke the bear—or dog, as the case may be.

"What’s the matter, Sesshoumaru? I thought you said child’s play was over? Or could it be that you’re having second thoughts?"

The daiyoukai did not respond with words, but his aura flared with renewed intensity, becoming noticeably more feral. His hand reached for his opposite side, grasping Tokijin’s hilt and drawing the sword with a flourish.

"Ah, so you’re truly going to kill me now," Hakago mocked. _As if you hadn’t been trying to this point._ "But would you really murder your own broth—oh, I see! You plan to kill me, then revive Inuyasha with Tenseiga. How incredibly noble of you, Sesshoumaru!"

"This Sesshoumaru will kill you for defiling Chichi-ue’s bloodline, and Inuyasha for allowing it to happen. If Tenseiga deems the half-breed worthy of being revived, then it shall be so. You, on the other hand, will rot in the depths of hell."

Hakago chuckled wickedly. "How convenient, to lay your brother’s life before the sword forged from your Oyaji’s fang. So you can pretend that you don’t care whether Inuyasha lives or dies, when we all know that you want him to li—"

"Silence!" Sesshoumaru growled. "Do not speak as though you know me. The time for pointless conversation is over. Prepare yourself. From here, this Sesshoumaru shall not stop until you are dead!"

It appeared that Sesshoumaru had every intention of keeping that vow. His first strike with Tokijin set Hakago’s teeth to chattering as he blocked with Tetsusaiga. The sword in its rustic form was not much good for offense, but it could stop attacks well enough. Some of Tokijin’s kenatsu struck him with every clash, but he could deal with that for a time before the accumulated damage became a problem. A casual observer might wonder how he intended to win when all he could do was hold off his enemy’s sword swings with a rusty old katana, especially when doing so required both hands and all of his energy, _and_ he was gradually taking damage in the process. But in Hakago’s mind, he had Sesshoumaru right where he wanted him. This phase of the battle was not about landing a winning blow; it was about getting under his adversary’s skin, a process he had already begun.

"So, Sesshoumaru, you think you can kill me and revive your brother’s corpse?" he repeated in a strained tone, his words broken by grunts of exertion. "Don’t make me laugh. Let me tell you what’s really going to happen here." A particularly fierce blow from Tokijin knocked him back, but he somersaulted gracefully and planted his feet in time to receive the next one.

"First I’m going to slice you open and leave you lying face-down in a pool of your own blood. Then I’ll disembowel that Kagura bitch and see if she bleeds like the rest of us. And then, once she’s watched both of you be butchered, I’ll take that little girl and—"

The sheer malevolence of Sesshoumaru’s snarl stilled Hakago’s tongue for a brief moment, but the sight of the daiyoukai’s eyes flashing red inspired no fear.

"Oh, did I hit a sore spot? Well, let me correct myself then. I think I’ll leave you alive to witness the demise of your precious females. I could hack off your arms and legs, and maybe run Rin through with your own claws. Then perhaps I could draw out her entrails and strangle you with them. Would you like that, Sesshoumaru?"

The daiyoukai’s rage boiled over then, his eyes going fully red as his aura spiked and his muzzle began to lengthen. Hakago’s smirk widened. _Go ahead, Sesshoumaru. Transform! Putting down a giant dog will be ‘child’s play.’_ But Sesshoumaru did not transform; after a moment of hovering on the brink, his face reverted back its fully humanoid shape, though his normally golden eyes maintained their crimson hue. Hakago was sure that the dual pleading exclamations by Kagura and Rin had a lot to do with the change; hearing them had obviously helped return Sesshoumaru to his senses. But Hakago was not deterred; it was but a minor setback, after all. The daiyoukai was still downright furious, and resumed his attacks in earnest. Rather than cold and calculating, however, the strikes were wild, imprecise and not nearly as effective. It occurred to Hakago that he had completely turned the tables on Sesshoumaru. Whereas in their past battles, Inuyasha had fought as the rogue warrior, swinging Tetsusaiga like a club while his elder brother danced around him with superior swordsmanship, now the daiyoukai was the one fighting with his heart rather than his head. Sesshoumaru was lost in a semi-deranged state where saving those he cared about was the only thing that mattered, and where minor details could escape one’s notice. One such ‘minor detail’ in particular…

When he judged the time was right, Hakago surged forward and met Sesshoumaru’s strike before it gained its full power. He received a nasty backlash from Tokijin’s kenatsu as a result, due to the proximity of his face to the clashing blades. But Sesshoumaru’s momentum had been stopped cold, and the daiyoukai bared his fangs, exerting pressure against Tetsusaiga. Clearly he intended to finish this with a contest of brute strength. Even using two arms, Hakago doubted he could win, with the damage his body had suffered to this point. But he didn’t need to prevail; all he needed to do was hold this position for a few more seconds…

"Fool," he rasped, his voice rough with exertion but thick with excitement. "You haven’t even noticed yet, have you?"

Sesshoumaru’s eyes widened in alarm at the same instant that the Shikon no Tama’s blackness finished its gradual journey up Tetsusaiga’s blade. He launched himself backward as the sword and its wielder suddenly transformed, the explosion of dual auras of pure evil sending a shiver down even the daiyoukai’s spine. At last he understood his peril, but it was far, far too late to escape the trap.

"Kaze no Kizu!"

Sesshoumaru altered course in an instant, knowing that the best way to avoid the expanding swath of youki was to sidestep. But with as close as he was to the source of the conflagration, he lacked the time to evade its wrath completely. The outermost blade of youki struck him squarely, and though he attempted to block it with Tokijin, the blade could not deflect all of Tetsusaiga’s energy. The onrushing youki caught his left side, slicing him from heel to shoulder. After the deflection it was no longer potent enough to tear him asunder, but his clothing immediately darkened with a great discharge of blood. The force of the blow spun him to the side, but he somehow maintained his footing and leapt back in retreat, leaning heavily on his right leg.

Hakago supposed he could simply fire another Kaze no Kizu and finish this, but that would be rather anticlimactic. He fully intended to follow through on his threats—the one about leaving Sesshoumaru limbless and throttling him with Rin’s intestines sounded especially entertaining. Beyond that, he desired the tactile pleasure of tearing the arrogant daiyoukai to pieces with his bare hands, or Tetsusaiga’s blade. Besides, Sesshoumaru could be fairly slippery when he wanted to be, and Hakago did not wish to allow any opportunity for a miraculous escape.

He charged after the retreating daiyoukai with Tetsusaiga raised, closing the distance with powerful thrusts of his legs. Seeing the futility of his retreat, Sesshoumaru stopped abruptly and swung Tokijin in a bid to catch his onrushing enemy off guard. Hakago took the strike on Tetsusaiga’s blade and swung for the daiyoukai’s exposed side. Sesshoumaru parried gracefully and danced to the side, deflecting the attack without engaging most of its force. The shift in tactics reflected the drastically altered situations of the combatants. In his wounded state, Sesshoumaru could no longer overpower his adversary, who despite his own injuries now came on like a crazed monster, wildly wielding a blade of pure night. If Hakago’s glowing red eyes and malicious aura frightened the daiyoukai, he gave no indication. The infant’s throat resonated with a constant snarl, as he channeled the rebellious ferocity of Inuyasha’s caged beast into his muscles, feeding off the unadulterated bloodlust and his own desperation to finish this before the stress became too much to bear. Still, he loved every moment.

Tokijin howled each time Sesshoumaru’s footwork proved a step too slow, forcing him to block Tetsusaiga’s brutal strikes rather than parry. And finally, the sword made from the fangs of the oni who had bitten Tetsusaiga in half reached its breaking point. Corrupted by the Shikon no Tama, Tetsusaiga took its revenge, smashing through Tokijin’s blade and biting deep into the flesh of its wielder. Sesshoumaru spun to the side and avoided being cleaved in two, but he collapsed to the ground and was unable to rise to his feet. He heaved himself to a knee, glaring at his enemy as blood flowed from his wounds and passed his lips with every exhale. Hakago set his stance and raised Tetsusaiga high above his head. One more blow…one more blow to inflict a mortal wound, before the already rising power of Tenseiga could spirit Sesshoumaru off again, as it had done all those months ago when Inuyasha had nearly killed him with the Kaze no Kizu. He would forcibly separate Sesshoumaru into two unequal pieces, then shatter Tenseiga and leave the daiyoukai to die in a pool of his own blood as promised. And if Sesshoumaru managed to cling to life long enough to witness his companions’ messy demise, all the better. His nerves afire with the impending climax of the battle, Hakago swung his sword.

Or tried to. The muscles in his arms spasmed, but Tetsusaiga refused to move even a centimeter. It was as though someone had tied an invisible rope around the blade, preventing it from swinging forward. Said rope snapped after perhaps a second or two, but by then Tenseiga’s energy had fully engulfed Sesshoumaru. And when the great black bade finally descended, its wielder hollering in dismay, all that remained to strike was vacant earth.

"Dam—hup!" Hakago cried, his intended curse cut off as he leapt to avoid the blades of youki aimed to slice him into a hanyou-shaped hunk of raw meat. It was Kagura, raining her wind blades down upon him from high above. She looked fiercer than Hakago had ever seen her, but with Sesshoumaru alive and making his escape, she wasn’t driven to throw caution to the proverbial winds and approach any closer. He had counted on her becoming crazed with anger and sorrow at Sesshoumaru’s downfall, her quest for vengeance carrying her into his range. But clearly that wasn’t going to happen. She could continue to shower him with death from above, and he could do little about it.

"Dammit," he swore, the softly-uttered syllables dripping with unrequited malice. But he was no fool. If he pursued the rapidly vanishing bluish glow which was Sesshoumaru, it would end badly for him. His body was far from pristine shape; he would need the extra burst of speed which came with Inuyasha’s full-youkai transformation to have any chance of keeping up with his quarry. But that transformation was a double-edged sword; if he remained in that state for too long, the beast currently raging within would burst forth and consume him. And he sensed that he was rapidly approaching that tipping point, his mental defenses being steadily pushed back by the savage intensity of the predator inside him. Adding Kagura’s unassailable position and ranged attacks to the mix only provided more evidence to support the conclusion which he was forced to embrace—if he wanted to see another sunrise, he had to let Sesshoumaru go.

With one final livid snarl, Hakago dropped the Shikon no Tama. All of the vigor left him in an instant, the power and ferocity of Inuyasha’s full-youkai essence receding in a rush, leaving only the hanyou behind. A wounded, exhausted hanyou at that. But he stood tall, facing Kagura as the wind sorceress eyed him warily from afar, and the last trace of Tenseiga’s aura vanished over the eastern horizon. Deliberately, and with as much dignity as he could muster, Hakago sheathed Tetsusaiga and picked up the fallen jewel, tucking the now dormant sphere into his robes once more. With one final glare directed at his former sister, he turned and stalked off into the young night. Kagura made no move to follow; within moments, her aura had faded into the distance as well.

Hakago tiled his head to the sky and sighed. After such a wonderful battle, that ending had been extremely disappointing. But still, it was not all bad news. Inuyasha’s resistance had emerged at the crucial moment, but he had felt nothing from the hanyou before that. And that resistance had only been sufficient to still his sword for a moment or two. Without Tenseiga, Sesshoumaru would still be dead or dying at this very moment.

Clearly, he had engaged in this battle too soon. But how long should he have waited, before Inuyasha’s resistance would be unable to hinder his efforts to slay his elder brother? A day? A week? A month? It was impossible to say for sure. One thing Hakago did know was that his efforts to attain full autonomy over this body were slowly reaching fruition. It would not be long now.

Despite this evening’s setback, Hakago’s lips gradually curled up into a genuine smile. _Be grateful, Sesshoumaru. The next time we meet, I will be the unchallenged master of this body. And you will not be so lucky._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – So…does everyone hate Hakago yet? I didn’t originally intend to make him this evil, but he just sort of evolved that way. My worst villain ever, I think (Naraku included). I hope he’s at least as fun to hate for you guys as he is for me.


	41. The Way Forward, Part 1

Kagome’s brow twitched in annoyance as the warbling of some stupid bird right outside her window sent nails-on-a-chalkboard type reverberations through her skull. Normally she might derive some pleasure from listening to the melodious song, but not today. Today she was more tempted to open the window and throw a book at the little avian. But the prospect of rising from her bed seemed so onerous, and it was far easier to simply draw the covers over her head. The warbling was only muffled as opposed to silenced, but at least she didn’t have to get up.

Except to go to the bathroom, that is. Oh, yes, she had definitely entered the dreaded third trimester; her body had made that perfectly clear to her over the past several weeks. She might as well replace her desk chair with a commode. Not that she had any reason to sit her desk. Going to school was out of the question, so there was nothing to study. She supposed she could spend her time trying to prepare for delivery and motherhood, but just didn’t have the energy. Lying in bed was all she ever seemed to feel like doing these days. Even eating had become a chore. Her mother had been cooking oden and other meals she loved, but the food turned to cardboard in her mouth and she had to literally choke it down. Her mother hadn’t fallen off the wagon, so obviously the issue wasn’t the actual quality of the food, but Kagome didn’t care enough to attempt to remedy the problem. She was pretty sure she knew the reason why she found it so hard to enjoy anything in life anymore, but in this case there was literally no cure for what ailed her.

Kagome sighed, turning her head into her pillow. But for the first time, no tears came when she thought of Inuyasha. Perhaps she had finally exhausted her supply. That’s what happens when one cries enough to fill a bathtub in just a few days. The journey back to the well had been hard enough, but she’d always held some ridiculous hope that they’d run into Inuyasha on the way. The instant she gazed up from the bottom of the well and saw a roof over her head, instead of the clear blue sky of the feudal era, it hit her—Inuyasha was truly gone. Barring a miracle, she would never see him again. She had no faith that Sesshoumaru or Kouga would be of any help, to say nothing of Kikyou’s vindictive agenda. She had been content to delude herself for a time, but no longer. She was now officially a single mother. Whatever she and Inuyasha had was over.

Soft knocking on the door broke Kagome from her musings, and she rolled her eyes. It was probably her mother come to check on her. Again. When she gave no response, she heard the doorknob turn and the hinges creak just a bit. Yep, definitely her mother. At least Souta and Jii-chan went away when she didn’t answer, which was most of the time.

"Kagome?"

The young miko suppressed a growl. She knew her mother was concerned about her, but she just wanted to be left alone! Still, she was determined not to take her misery out on her family. They didn’t deserve that. It would help if her mother especially was not making that noble task so damn difficult. She knew from experience that if she pretended to be asleep the older woman would go away, but she would need to relieve herself in a few minutes so there was no point in doing that. Besides, her stomach had already started rumbling, and her mother would probably offer to make lunch. Kagome wasn’t so miserable as to look that gift horse in the mouth. If her mother’s cooking tasted like cardboard, she could only imagine how offensive to the palate her own would prove.

"Yes, Mama?" she asked after a moment, pulling the covers down off her head. Her mother blinked at her in surprise; she apparently had not been anticipating an acknowledgment. But she quickly adopted a smile so artificially bright that Kagome wished for sunglasses.

"It’s a beautiful day out, dear. Why don’t you come down and have lunch, and then we can go to the park?"

"No park," Kagome snapped. Her tone was harsher than intended, mostly because she had to refrain from saying something cruel. _As I told you yesterday, I don’t want to go to the damn park!_

"Well, then maybe shopping for baby clothes? Or we could even just sit outside by the Goshinboku for a b—"

"I’m not going outside!"

Kagome felt a twinge of guilt for the way her mother’s expression saddened instantly, but was too irritated to apologize for her outburst. It wouldn’t have happened if the stubborn woman had taken the hint in the first place. Evidently, even spelling it out so fervidly was not going to work this time, for her mother’s eyes narrowed and her jaw set with determination. Kagome groaned quietly to herself. She had known that eventually her mother would push the issue with her, but was still not pleased with this development. She was truly not in the mood. Too many days of waking on the wrong side of the bed can leave one living on the wrong side of life.

"Kagome…don’t you think you’ve been spending a little too much time in your room?"

Her mother’s tone was gentle and understanding, but Kagome sensed a certain firmness underneath which suggested that the older woman had reached her breaking point on this. That didn’t mean the teen was ready to give in. Instead, she set her jaw and prepared for war.

"No, I don’t."

"Well, I do," her mother retorted, and though the sympathy in her voice was much reduced, it was still there. "You need to go outside, Kagome."

"I don’t want to."

"That’s too bad. You’re coming out of the house today, and that’s final."

Kagome snorted. "So much for ‘I can’t tell you what to do anymore.’"

Mrs. Higurashi opened her mouth to deliver what would likely have been a scathing retort, but thought better of it. Her teeth ground together audibly as she took a deep breath to regain some semblance of composure. A small part of Kagome was grateful, the same part which felt guilty over her last comment. But that element of her consciousness was still decidedly in the minority, and she waited for her mother to speak with the goal of pouncing on whatever words she uttered next. Perhaps that was the reason Mrs. Higurashi took a few moments to choose her next words carefully, so as to avoid escalating the situation. Of the two of them, she had to be the mature adult. Kagome was most certainly not in the right state of mind for that. When Mrs. Higurashi did finally speak, her tone had receded once more toward ‘motherly,’ though it still maintained its fierce edge.

"Kagome, I understand how you feel, but—"

"How could you possibly understand how I feel?!" Kagome demanded thoughtlessly.

Her mother arched her brow, then spoke softly in a voice heavy with emotion. "Did you really just ask me how I could understand how it feels to lose a loved one?"

Kagome’s eyes flew as wide as saucers, her hand shooting to her mouth as if to forcibly retract her foolish words. Obviously that was impossible, no matter how hard she wished. _Am I…really such a terrible person?_ All of the righteous anger which had sustained her belligerence to this point faded away, leaving only deep-seated sadness colored by new remorse for her behavior.

"S-Sorry, Mama," she muttered, lying back down and curling dejectedly onto her side. She had released her pent-up grief and frustration upon her family, exactly what she’d vowed not to do. She wouldn’t blame her mother for not speaking to her for a while. Fortunately, Mrs. Higurashi was a better parent than that. Kagome heard approaching footsteps, then felt her mother sit at the foot of the bed. Her hand patted Kagome’s leg affectionately over the covers, causing the teen to curl further into herself in shame. She was surprised to feel her eyes moisten, though the tears did not fall yet. It was oddly comforting, the knowledge that she could still cry upon realizing how awful she’d been to those who loved her. Her mother didn’t say anything, bless her heart. For several minutes the two of them sat silently in the dark room, the only light sources the hallway and the window blocked by the shade.

Finally, Mrs. Higurashi spoke. "I really do understand how you feel, Kagome," she stated solemnly. Rather than despairing, however, her voice was at least somewhat hopeful, granting the impression of an uplifting message.

"You were fairly young when your father died. I don’t know how much you remember. Custom dictated that you should be there after his body was cremated, but you were inconsolable at the funeral and I wanted to spare you that. So your grandfather and I were the only people there. Together we collected the bones from his ashes and put them in the urn. My hand was shaking so badly…to this day I don’t know how I held the chopsticks. Afterwards, your grandfather watched you for a few hours so I could grieve in peace. I went to my room and lay in my empty bed, just as you are doing now. I cried until I couldn’t cry anymore. I wondered how I was going to raise you without him, and how I could hope to bring another child into this world and raise him without a father. It was one of the worst periods of my life.

"I tried to get out of bed several times, but I didn’t have the energy. Part of me wanted to stay in bed forever. To some extent, I suppose I lost the will to live. Then, after I don’t know how long, I heard a soft knocking on my door. A child’s voice, calling my name. It was you, Kagome. You were worried about me, and you snuck away from your grandfather to come find me. That’s what it took for me to rise from that bed. Your frightened voice, calling for your ‘Mama.’ Without that…I might have stayed in my room until Souta was born.

"You know the rest of the story. I jumped back into motherhood, and raised you and your brother on my own, with a little help from your grandfather. I would like to tell you that the pain of losing your father goes away, but it doesn’t. It fades with time, as all grief does, but it will never truly leave, nor do I want it to. Living, however, does get easier. Once you make the decision to rise from that bed, you find that moving on isn’t quite as difficult as you feared. Your life will never be the same…but you know that you are strong enough to make it."

By this point, Kagome had long since given up any attempt to hold back her tears. Her mother’s words had inspired a rush of dormant or buried memories, and caused her to realize how long it had been since she’d thought of her father. She’d been in the feudal era for the last anniversary of his death and had missed it completely. But she did remember him, and considered herself blessed to have known him even for such a short time. One thing which she as a young child had never comprehended, however, was her mother’s own battle with grief. For the first time, Kagome realized just how deeply her mother understood what she was going through. And Inuyasha probably wasn’t even dead yet. She hadn’t been forced to stand over his lifeless corpse, or pick his bones from his ashes. There was still hope that he was alive and would one day return to her. And if not, her situation was still not as dire as her mother’s had been. Mrs. Higurashi had one person to help her raise two kids; Kagome carried a single child and had two whole families to support her, one on each side of the bone eater’s well. Given that her mother had come through her battle with grief and raised two fine, reasonably well-adjusted children, how could Kagome slip into despair when her path even in the worst case was not nearly as daunting? And how could she ever become a mother, if she couldn’t even bring herself to go on living, truly _living_ , without Inuyasha? The answers were obvious, as was what she needed to do. _But…am I strong enough to rise from this bed?_

"Mama?"

"Yes, dear?"

"Will you…help me up?"

Mrs. Higurashi managed a watery smile, then stood and held out her hand. Kagome didn’t need help getting out of bed; she’d done it dozens of times over the past few days on her own to see to her body’s needs. But the symbolic nature of the act was not lost on either woman, as mother pulled daughter to her feet and they shared a warm embrace. When they finally parted, Kagome felt ready to face the world again. As she dried her tears, her mother strode over to the window and raised the shade. Kagome squinted against the light of the outside world, but she relished in the blue sky which she hadn’t seen in days. Hell, even that cursed bird’s warbling was starting to sound melodious again. Her mother glanced over her shoulder, but upon seeing her daughter’s acceptance she raised the window itself as well. Instantly a gentle breeze flowed into the room, stirring the stagnant air. Sampling the fresh air from the outside world caused Kagome to realize something unpleasant about the atmosphere she’d been breathing for most of the last seventy-two hours or more.

"It kinda stinks in here," she declared, wrinkling her nose.

Her mother chuckled at that. "Well, I didn’t want to say anything, but I would definitely leave the window open for a while. And you might want to change your sheets too."

Kagome grimaced and nodded, agreeing wholeheartedly with both recommendations. She wouldn’t have minded continuing the conversation, but standing up had caused the call of nature to shift from ‘pending but not terribly urgent’ to ‘go now or you’ll have to change your underwear.’ She heard her mother laughing at her awkward half-run, half-shuffle to the bathroom, but would not begrudge her for it. Especially not when the master chef called through the door that she was going to make lunch. Kagome’s stomach set to growling even as she finished emptying her bladder. She was really looking forward to finding out whether her suddenly malfunctioning sense of taste was back to normal.

While her mother went into the kitchen, Kagome sat on the couch and flipped on the TV in the hopes of turning off her brain for a little while. Souta was at school and Jii-chan was outside, so for now it was just the two of them in the house. A few peaceful minutes passed as Kagome listened to her mother’s workmanlike whistling over the mind-numbing dialogue of some mid-day TV drama, enjoying the utter lack of mental stimulation. But just as she was slumping into the couch and sinking into something akin to a comatose state, the phone rang.

"Can you answer that, Kagome?" her mother called. "My hands are dirty."

Rolling her eyes, Kagome sent a mental reprimand to whoever had dared to disturb her relaxation, but nevertheless moved to comply.

"Moshi moshi," she answered, managing to conceal the better part of her annoyance. There was a brief pause on the other end of the line.

"Kagome? Is that you?" It took the miko a few seconds to recognize the voice, since she hadn’t heard it in quite a while.

"Eri?"

"Hey! I didn’t expect you to answer the phone. Whenever we call your mom says you aren’t up to talking. You must be out of bed now though. Are you feeling any better?"

"Um…yeah, a little. I don’t think I’ll be going back to school anytime soon though."

"Oh, that’s too bad. Are you up for a visit?"

Kagome grimaced and bit her lip. On the one hand, she would love to see her friends again. They had drifted apart during the past year due to her near-constant excursions to the feudal era, but prior to that they had been fairly close. They had always been good study partners, though as one of the ‘smart kids’ Kagome sometimes saw herself as more of a tutor than a fellow student. But she hadn’t minded because she liked them and they had fun together. They had also always been there for each other when needed. When Yuka’s older brother died in a car accident when she was twelve, she had leaned on them for emotional support and they had helped her get through it. And finally, they held each other’s secrets and confidences, a level of trust which had been earned over long years of companionship.

It was this last thought which gave Kagome pause. If she was going to have any sort of continuing relationship with Eri, Yuka, and Ayumi—something she desperately wanted—then she was going to have to tell them the truth at some point. If she feigned illness now, they would eventually move on. The phone calls Eri had mentioned would grow further and further apart, and would eventually cease altogether. She would lose them, just as she had already lost Inuyasha. It didn’t have to be that way. If upon learning of her pregnancy they decided they didn’t want to associate with her anymore, then at least she could say that she tried. In the worst case, they would spread a rumor or inform the school authorities. But even that wouldn’t make much of a difference to Kagome, since she didn’t intend to go to school or see most of her former classmates ever again. And she was confident that this scenario would not come to pass, at any rate. Even if her friends abandoned her, she believed she could trust them to keep her secret. And so, before she could second-guess herself, Kagome gave her reply.

"S-Sure, Eri. I’d love to see you guys."

"Cool! We’ll come over after school, if that’s okay."

"That’s fine. I’ll see you—hey, wait. Aren’t you at school now, Eri?"

"Yeah."

"How are you calling me then?"

"Oh, you didn’t hear? I finally got a cell phone for my birthday! I’m calling from the roof."

Kagome smiled softly. _She’s calling you during her lunch break, Kagome. That’s how much they still care about you._ Given that she had been an absentee friend for most of the past year, even that small gesture said a lot.

"Well, I’m glad you finally got a cell phone, Eri. I remember you wanted one for a long time."

"I know, right? I swear my mom grew up in the nineteenth century, but she finally came around for my sixteenth birth—ugh, I think I hear the bell ringing, Kagome. See you later, okay?"

"Yep. I’ll look forward to it."

As she hung up the phone, Kagome sighed and hung her head. _What did I just get myself into?_ Going over her reasons again, she concluded that she was doing the right thing. Being nervous about it was only natural, she supposed. But the butterflies in her stomach did nothing to ruin her appetite, as she discovered when her mother called her in for lunch a few minutes later. She couldn’t repress a groan of pure pleasure as the first bite of oden touched her tongue. She had to forcibly restrain herself from gobbling down her food like a half-starved wild animal.

"Taste good, dear?" her mother teased, to which Kagome nodded enthusiastically. "Well, don’t hold yourself back on my account. It does my heart good to see you eating well."

Kagome did discard her manners a bit after that, but still made sure to eat like a civilized person. Just because she missed Inuyasha didn’t mean she intended to start acting like him. The memories of him scarfing down instant ramen brought a smile to her face, but there was something she needed to say and eventually she pushed her plate to the side and worried her bottom lip.

"Is something wrong, Kagome?"

"Mama…do you mind taking a rain check on going to the park today?" Her mother frowned, and Kagome immediately understood her concern. "It’s not that I intend to go back to my room all day," she added. "It’s just that Eri called, and I…invited her, Yuka, and Ayumi to come over."

Mrs. Higurashi leaned back in her chair and studied her daughter carefully for a moment, as if to ascertain whether the teen understood the potential consequences of her decision. Seeing that her concerns were unfounded, the older woman nodded and smiled.

"I’ll take that rain check, then. I just want you to be happy, dear."

"I know, Mama. Thanks."

"After lunch why don’t you go back through the well and visit with your other friends? I’m sure they’re worried about you."

Kagome sighed. "You’re probably right. I’d better bring Shippou-chan some pocky so he doesn’t yell at me."

Mrs. Higurashi chuckled. "A man’s heart can always be won with food, Kagome, no matter how old he is. Never forget that."

"And for some men you don’t even have to _cook_ the food," Kagome cracked, thinking of the eating preferences of the two ‘men’ in her life. Shippou would be happy to each pocky all day until he became a roly poly ball of fox flab, and making ramen did not qualify as cooking a meal. It was funny how Inuyasha could be so easy to satisfy at mealtime, and so impossible to deal with at other times.

The two women shared light conversation as they finished eating, and afterwards Kagome took a trip through the well as planned. Shippou was indeed angry that she’d been gone for so long, but the sweet treat pacified him as hoped. Preparations for Miroku and Sango’s wedding were in full swing. Miroku was working on erecting the couple’s future home, along with a handful of men from the village who had volunteered to help. Kagome couldn’t help but reflect that the process would be faster if aided by Inuyasha’s superhuman strength, but she couldn’t dwell on melancholy for too long, not with Sango anxiously making preparations of her own. She had borrowed some wedding attire from the village women, but didn’t like any of the kimono which had been offered. After a bit of gentle digging, Kagome finally got to the bottom of the issue—Sango had always wanted to be married in her mother’s kimono, which was of a different style than anything the locals owned. Unfortunately it had been ruined during the destruction of the taijiya village.

The solution was simple as far as Kagome was concerned—go shop for a kimono at the regional marketplace. Merchants came from fair distances to sell their wares, so odds were that someone had the style Sango was looking for. The challenging part was convincing the reserved taijiya that doing so would not be a waste of money. Obviously she was more concerned with the well-being of the family she intended to start with Miroku, and making sure they had sufficient funds to live comfortably and support the many children they both desired. But despite her disparaging comments concerning the proposed purchase—the words ‘silly’ and ‘wasteful’ were used, among others—it was clear to Kagome how much this meant to her friend. She eventually persuaded Sango to at least discuss the matter with her fiancé, who she secretly knew would agree with her wholeheartedly.

Miroku did just that, of course, as he also saw right through Sango’s dismissive act. Together, he and Kagome managed to convince the taijiya to at least travel to the market to see what they could find. Sango reluctantly agreed, but she was adamant that they would find a good deal or return home empty-handed. Relieved, Kagome let the matter drop, figuring that they could argue about what constituted a ‘good deal’ when they got to the market. She promised to return to the feudal era early the following morning to accompany Sango and Kirara. Miroku agreed to remain behind and continue working on their home, since he could be confident that both women would be well-protected. Sango and Kirara were formidable in their own right, and Kagome was no slouch against youkai opponents either. The monk did make them promise to be careful, and no doubt he would worry, but he evidently realized that he needed to trust in his fiancée’s judgment if their marriage was going to work. Without the Shikon no Tama, the odds of the women running into anything they couldn’t handle were extremely slim. And in that case, the presence of the now kazaana-less monk would probably make little difference.

That settled, Kagome visited with her friends for a couple more hours before returning to the modern era to meet her other friends. She sat in the living room nervously tapping the heel of her foot, watching the television yet not really digesting the content. When the doorbell finally rang, she jumped up and practically ran to the doorway. She heaved a sigh of relief upon glimpsing through the peephole that it was just the three girls outside; they hadn’t brought Hojo as she’d started to fear. Her recent ‘breakup’ with him was likely to blame for that, but Kagome was grateful nonetheless. After a deep, calming breath, she opened the door and welcomed her guests with a bright smile plastered on her face.

All of them choked on their return greetings, as three sets of eyes widened and panned down to stare at Kagome’s belly. She had chosen clothing which would not conceal her condition in any way, so their initial reaction came as no surprise. Nor did the way they failed on several attempts to find words, or began studiously gazing anywhere but her, all while fidgeting uncomfortably. Finally Kagome took mercy on them.

"Would you like to come in?"

This was the first test. If they were going to reject her, it would likely be right here. If they walked away now, Kagome would know that their friendship was not nearly as strong as she thought it was. Despite some hesitation, however, all three girls nodded and followed as she led them through the first floor and up the stairs to her bedroom. Mrs. Higurashi welcomed them from the kitchen, a greeting which they returned awkwardly. But no one suddenly turned and bolted from the house, which Kagome found at least somewhat encouraging. Their reactions had caused dormant feelings of shame to rouse within her, but that was to be expected also. She was a pregnant teenager in a society which frowned heavily upon such a thing; she was _supposed_ to be ashamed. Still, she was only ashamed by the irresponsibility which had caused her to be in this situation in the first place, not by her decision to keep the baby. And if offered the chance to go back in time and do it all over again, she could in all honestly say that she would probably decline to do so. If it would mean giving up this life inside of her, with whom she had already bonded so much, then she didn’t think she would even want to go through with it.

Kagome left her friends sitting on her bed while she went to fetch the tea, figuring that giving them a few minutes to process the shocking revelation and talk amongst themselves might be beneficial. Sure enough, there was a whispered conversation going on when she returned, but it stopped before she could make out what they were saying. After serving the tea, she sat in her desk chair and turned to face them, trying to exude a mature, dignified manner. This time when she met each of their gazes in turn, none of them looked away. But no one seemed interested in being the first to speak, so Kagome took that burden upon herself.

"I’m sure you guys have a lot of questions," she observed. "But why don’t I start from the beginning?" At their nods, Kagome did just that.

"I’ve told you before about my boyfriend, Inuyasha. You know, the ‘two-timing, short-tempered, violent’ one? Well, in complaining about his bad qualities I think I’ve given you an inaccurate portrait of him. I fell in love with Inuyasha for his good qualities. And I fully intended to share my life with him.

"One night about seven and a half months ago, we went to a party and drank too much. The party was my idea, so I don’t want you to blame Inuyasha for what happened next. In the morning I was pregnant, though I didn’t realize it until a few weeks later. Ever since then I’ve been hiding it from the school. The last time I went, Mama told them I was sick and needed to wear warm clothes. I had thought that would be the last time I ever saw you guys…but when Eri called this afternoon, I decided that it was time I told you the truth. I would like to still be friends…"

The girls exchanged glances with each other, but no one said or did anything to signal outright rejection. Kagome could see that they had questions, however, and waited patiently for one of them to gather the courage to speak.

"So, all this time," Yuka stated quietly, "have you really been sick?"

Kagome tried not to grimace. She’d known this question would come up, and had an answer ready.

"No. There were times when I really was sick, but most of the time I was just with Inuyasha."

"Y-y-you eloped?!" the other girl demanded in a scandalized voice.

"I guess you could say that," Kagome admitted, forcing herself to speak slowly with a measured tone. "Though not in the traditional sense. Inuyasha and I only slept together once. Most of the time, we were with a group of mutual friends."

"Doing what?"

Again Kagome held back a grimace. This was where the inevitable lies came in. She couldn’t tell her friends the whole truth, after all, or they’d probably try to have her committed.

"Nothing special, really. Just hanging out."

Yuka frowned. "So let me get this straight. Instead of going to school, you’ve been spending all of your time with your boyfriend and the other members of his street gang? How could your mother allow—"

"Don’t blame anything on Mama," Kagome interrupted, her voice somewhat raised. She quickly lowered it once more. "And Inuyasha isn’t in a gang. Look, spending time with Inuyasha and our friends, being part of that world…it quickly became every important to me. If Mama tried to forbid me from going to see them, I probably would have run away. I didn’t exactly give her much choice in the matter. She either had to accept the decisions I made…or lose her daughter."

The girls pondered that in stunned silence for a few moments. Kagome received the distinct impression that they were quietly judging her, which again came as no surprise. Not many modern teenagers would make the life choices she had made, so she endeavored to provide further explanation.

"Inuyasha was my first love," she confessed. "And I was following my heart. I think, in a way, that my feelings blinded me to what was really going on. But I loved being with him. I made lifelong friends and many happy memories."

"But Kagome, what will you do now? You used to do so well in school. Didn’t you dream of a good career? Don’t you want to—"

"My dreams have changed, Yuka. I’m not the same person I used to be, and I don’t desire the same things. With the people I’ve known and the experiences I’ve had, I’ve come to realize that living a ‘normal’ life in this ti—city, will never make me truly happy."

Yuka looked like she wanted to say more, but Ayumi interrupted with her first words of her conversation.

"What would make you happy, Kagome?"

The miko smiled at her soft-spoken friend; of the three of them, Ayumi was most likely to understand the concept of ‘thinking with one’s heart.’ She had always been the most romantically-inclined of Kagome’s modern companions, and the miko was glad that she was willing to try to see past her discarded dreams.

"Living in the country with Inuyasha and raising our child. That’s the only thing that will make me truly happy, Ayumi."

"But…are you still with Inuyasha?"

Kagome sighed miserably, dropping the ‘cool and composed’ act for good. She had left plenty of hints concerning the deterioration of her relationship with Inuyasha, and it was only natural for her friends to ask about it. Here at least she could tell the truth, though perhaps not the whole truth.

"Inuyasha had to leave. I don’t know when he’ll be back." _Or if he’ll be back_ , she added in her head, though her friends seemed to understand the hidden meaning perfectly well.

"Kagome…" Eri muttered, and the miko knew the next words out of her mouth were going to urge her to move on from Inuyasha and put her life back together. Words she did not need to hear. She _had_ put her life back together, just not the life that they and the rest of the modern world had in mind.

"I’ll be honest with you, Eri. I don’t know when Inuyasha will be back. I don’t know where he is or what he’s doing. Hell, he could be shacking up with his first girlfriend, for all I know. In the end, it doesn’t really matter. If he comes back, I’ll figure out what to do then. But for now, I have to move on without him.

"I’m excited to have this baby. I know that’s hard to understand, but it’s true. I’m scared too, of course, but I can’t wait to hold him in my arms. I thought about getting an abortion, but decided to keep the baby. That was _my_ choice, not Inuyasha’s or anybody else’s. Even back then I knew that Inuyasha could offer me no guarantees, but I chose to keep my baby because I wanted to. He’s not even born yet and I already love him.

"Do I have any regrets? Of course I do. I wish I had handled things differently with Inuyasha. But I don’t regret becoming pregnant with his child. And I don’t think I ever will."

The girls gazed at her in silence, comprehension dawning on their features. It was as though they finally saw her in a new light. Sympathy and reproach faded away, though not entirely. At last they began to see her as she saw herself, not as a victim of bad luck and foolish choices, but as someone who had forged her own path in life. It was a path few people chose willingly, but as in so many aspects of her life, Higurashi Kagome was the exception to the rule.

Finally, Eri broke the silence by sighing and resting her chin on her hands. "I feel like you’re five years older than us," she stated, only half-joking.

"At least," Yuka chimed in.

Kagome shrugged. "I’ve had to deal with a lot over the past year. I don’t feel like a teenager anymore. If I hadn’t grown up a bit, then I wouldn’t be able to raise a child, would I?" _Although, I learned earlier today that I still have a lot of growing up to do…_

"Probably not. I still don’t know how you can do it."

"When you love someone, you find a way," Kagome observed, referring to her unborn child. "I hope you guys find what makes you happy. If that’s a university and a high-powered career, then so be it. For my part, I’ll live a quiet life and raise my child. That will be good enough."

A trio of hesitant but genuine smiles greeted Kagome’s latest statement, and the corners of the miko’s own lips curled up to match. It looked like her friends had finally come around, at least for the most part. Eri confirmed it with her next statement.

"As long as you’re happy, Kagome…"

"So you’re having a boy?" Ayumi interjected eagerly, as though she’d been waiting to ask about the baby the entire time.

"According to my last ultrasound," Kagome replied brightly. _And my miko senses, of course._

"What are you going to name him?"

"I haven’t decided yet." _I was hoping Inuyasha would help me name him, but it doesn’t look like that’s going to happen._ "Do you guys have any suggestions?"

The girls did indeed have suggestions for baby names. A lot of suggestions. Kagome was just starting to think that asking them was a mistake when her bladder began demanding release rather insistently, providing the perfect justification for excusing herself from the talkative teens. On her way back to her room, she decided that she felt like a healthy snack. After asking her friends if they wanted anything, she headed downstairs, passing her mother reading in the living room.

"How’s it going, dear?"

"Fine, Mama. They had a hard time with me being allowed to skip school and travel with Inuyasha, but I think they’re coming around."

"Well, I understand that concern," Mrs. Higurashi declared, closing her book. "To this day, I still wonder if I did the right thing."

"You did, Mama. No matter how this turns out, you did the right thing."

Mrs. Higurashi grinned and shook her head. "Because you feel that way is the reason I can sleep at night. You haven’t always made the best choices, Kagome, but you always move forward with your head held high. Well…most of the time at least. Sometimes it takes a little gentle encouragement," she joked, before her tone became serious once more. "I’m proud of you, dear."

"Thanks, Mama. It…means a lot to hear you say that."

"So how much did you tell them?"

"I’m being as honest as I can, but obviously there are certain details I have to leave out."

"I figured as much. They’re better off not knowing all the fantastical, unbelievable details. If you say too much they’ll probably tell me to ship you off the loony bin."

"Some days I think I belong there," Kagome joked, grinning wryly.

"Don’t go getting yourself committed, young lady," her mother scolded playfully. "I’d like to be _grandmother_ to your baby, not legal guardian. You know, the person who gets to spoil the child rotten, then give him back to ‘Mama’ for all the parenting."

Kagome rolled her eyes and went into the kitchen. She knew her mother was just playing with her; if for any reason she proved incapable of raising her child, Mama Higurashi would step in without complaint. She didn’t want to serve as a substitute parent, but would do so if necessary. It was a great comfort to know that there were several people willing and able to care for her son in an emergency, on both sides of the well.

None of her friends wanted anything to eat, but Kagome cut up two pieces of fruit just in case they changed their minds. The bowl had indeed been picked clean by the time Eri, Yuka, and Ayumi departed about an hour later, and Kagome knew she hadn’t eaten every slice. While conversing with them had not been ‘just like old times,’ the miko felt that they were truly friends again, rather than casual acquaintances she saw once in a while at school. They had promised to keep her secret, and Kagome had faith that if her baby possessed any unusual features—canine ears, for example—then they would keep his secrets as well. Ayumi was especially excited to meet him; given her disposition, Kagome was not surprised to learn that she loved kids. Eri and Yuka were looking forward to it as well, but in more of a ‘he’s cute, but I’m glad he’s not mine’ sort of way. Those two would likely pursue high-paying careers right out of university, and only worry about marrying and having children later in life.

To each his own. That was a mantra Kagome would be content to live by, and hoped that her friends would embrace it as well. They made plans to see each other again in the not too distant future, and as she went to sleep that night, Kagome reflected that she was really glad she’d found the courage to talk to them. She would look forward to their next meeting, but in the meantime, she had plenty to keep her busy. Tomorrow it would be a trip to the market with Sango, and after that, she would adapt to what came. To use a common cliché, she would take it one day at a time. She was lucky to have an abundance of friends and family nearby to help her.

Kagome had a feeling that her battle with grief was not yet decided. But at the moment, grief was losing, and it wasn’t even close.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – The timeline here assumes that Kagome had been traveling with Inuyasha for a little less than five months prior to becoming pregnant, which I think is reasonable given the canon timeline. Portraying her as a stubborn teenager was new for me, but that’s what she is. For whatever maturity a person may carry herself with under normal circumstances, during times of grief we often revert to the worst version of ourselves. Everyone needs a little ‘tough love’ once in a while.


	42. The Way Forward, Part 2

Kagome woke bright and early the next morning, roused by her alarm clock and excited at the prospect of spending the day with Sango. Dressing took a little longer than usual because she was unused to the choice of attire. Not wishing to draw attention to herself, she had borrowed a loose-fitting kimono from one of the women of Kaede’s village. She would not advertise herself as a foreigner in strange garb, nor as a pregnant miko. She would, however, be bringing her bow and arrows. People could assume they were for self-defense or that she was carrying them for Sango, whom hiraikotsu would readily identify as a taijiya, i.e. not someone to mess with. Kagome didn’t expect any trouble, but one never knew.

Sango was fully dressed and almost finished preparing a quick breakfast by the time Kagome returned to the feudal era. The two of them shared the meal, along with Miroku, Shippou, and Kaede. Kagome offered Shippou the chance to come along, but the young fox declined, evidently finding construction work with the men more interesting than a shopping trip with the women. He did ask them to bring him something from the market, to which Kagome sagely replied that they would see what they could find. For his part, Miroku stated that he simply wished for both of them to return unharmed.

Sango rolled her eyes. "Yes, Houshi-sama, we’ll be careful," she replied, planting a quick kiss on his lips as she strode out the door. Kagome chuckled at the scene, amused because not so long ago such an outward display of intimacy would have been unthinkable, even in the company of close friends. Sango was still reserved about showing affection in public, as most people of the time period were, but she and Miroku had certainly come a long way.

The journey took a little less than an hour as the fire-cat flies, which was a far cry better than traveling by foot. It was almost impossible to walk from Kaede’s village to the market and back on the same day. Kagome and Sango arrived well before the busiest time of day, even before many of the people from the wealthier towns closer to the market. Therefore they could enjoy the opportunity to make their way through the rows of various wagons and stands without fear of being jostled, for which Kagome was grateful. And the merchants had not yet been jaded by the stresses of the day, so most were pleasant enough. Kagome tried to help Sango shop but gave up after a few minutes of the taijiya barely glancing at her suggestions. Her friend was a woman on a mission, and Kagome left her to it. Sango would clearly know the right kimono when she found it.

It happened just as they were running out of offerings to peruse, at a small cart near the outskirts of the market. The owner didn’t have much inventory left, but as soon as he held up one particular kimono, Sango gasped and her hand flew to her mouth in disbelief. In retrospect, perhaps she shouldn’t have been so obvious with her elation. The merchant was a short, balding man in his fifties, and did not seem unkind, but his eyes lit up at the prospect of an impending sale, and his friendly grin took on a sly edge. Sango’s shoulders slumped as soon as the man named his price, and she turned away.

"Wait, Sango-chan!" Kagome whispered as she sidled up to her friend, striding purposefully away from the high-priced disappointment. "Why don’t you haggle with him a bit?"

"It’s no good, Kagome-chan," the taijiya muttered sadly. "Even if the price is reduced by a quarter, it’s still more than half of Houshi-sama’s savings."

Kagome grimaced and patted her friend’s shoulder sympathetically. No matter how much Sango wanted the kimono, she wasn’t willing to spend anywhere near that amount of money. Kagome couldn’t blame her, but that didn’t make the letdown any easier to swallow.

"Excuse me, miss?"

Both women turned to find that the shopkeeper had followed them. The sly edge to his smile still remained, but he seemed to be thinking with a different part of his brain now. His next words confirmed it.

"That weapon…you wouldn’t happen to be a taijiya, would you?"

Sango’s back straightened suddenly, her head perking up in sudden interest. "Yes, I am," she replied with all the cool composure of a battle-hardened warrior.

"I see. I am returning to my home village tomorrow. It is almost a full day’s journey southwest of here. The last time I was there, about ten days ago, the village was having trouble with an infestation of rat youkai. Return with me to the village tomorrow. If the problem has already been solved, I will offer you the kimono at a one-tenth discount for your trouble. If the rats are still causing havoc and you exterminate them for us, I will offer a discount of one-half. In either case, I will secure comfortable lodging for the night for you and a companion. What do you say?"

Kagome’s first inclination was to start dancing a little jig, but fortunately Sango played it cool this time, staring off to the side in contemplation before speaking. "I agree to the terms except that I expect a discount of three-fourths for my services."

The merchant chuckled. "Beautiful _and_ a shrew negotiator! Your husband-to-be is a lucky man." Seeing that his flattery was having no effect, the man jumped right back into business. "A discount of six-tenths upon extermination of the youkai."

"Seven-tenths."

"Two-thirds. My final offer."

"Deal."

"Excellent! We will depart for my village as soon as you arrive here tomorrow morning."

Business concluded, Sango and the merchant exchanged a few pleasantries then went their separate ways. The taijiya didn’t reveal her excitement until she and Kagome were well out of sight and earshot of the merchant. She was clearly trying not to get her hopes up, in case the situation at the merchant’s village had changed, but it was a losing battle.

Seeing that her pregnant friend was starting to sag, Sango led Kagome over to a secluded spot under a tree and left her there with Kirara while she went hunting for a cheap treat for Shippou. The miko spent a relaxing few minutes enjoying the relative quiet and petting the fire-cat, glad to be off her feet. Her ankles were going to be especially swollen tonight, but it was well worth it in her book. When Sango returned with the aforementioned treat, she joined Kagome in relaxation. The peace gave the miko a chance to think about the following day.

"Hey, Sango-chan?" 

"Yeah?"

"Why don’t you take Miroku-sama with you tomorrow?"

Sango frowned. "I thought you were going with me? Seiki-san said you could ride in his cart so you don’t have to walk the whole way."

"I know, but that’s still a long journey. And I’m trying not to advertise myself as a miko, remember? You might need someone with spiritual power to help you exterminate the youkai."

Sango snorted. "Never needed any help exterminating youkai before…"

"Okay, so maybe not. But it would still be nice to travel with Miroku-sama, right? You two haven’t had much time to yourselves lately, have you?"

"W-well, no, I guess not."

"See! It might be your last chance to be alone with him before the wedding. You could fly back to Kaede’s village on Kirara as soon as the job is done, or you could take your time…and enjoy each other’s company."

The suggestive hint had the desired effect, causing Sango to blush darkly. But it also set the wheels in her head to turning, and Kagome knew she wouldn’t have to argue the point any further. _Miroku-sama, you really owe me one…_

After returning to Kaede’s village, Kagome ate lunch with her friends then returned to the modern era and took it easy for the rest of the day. It was amazing how even a short outing could sap her energy reserves now. Another thing to love about the third trimester. But the period of discomfort would be over soon; in less than two months, she would hold her child in her arms for the first time. And that thought was the perfect way to put all of life’s little experiences in the proper perspective.

* * *

Miroku and Sango departed for the merchant’s village on a Friday and had yet to return by Sunday morning. Kagome wasn’t really worried, figuring that they’d simply taken her advice to ‘enjoy each other’s company.’ She would check in again that afternoon, but in the meantime, her mother was plotting something. Kagome’s birthday had snuck up on her this year; she hadn’t even realized it was today until Jii-chan presented her with one of his patented ‘old priest’ style gifts at the breakfast table. This time it was a dried duck’s foot, which was apparently supposed to lighten her child’s disposition if worn around her neck. Since she didn’t believe that for a second, and since wearing the hideous, smelly thing would likely worsen _her_ disposition, Kagome did what she always did with Jii-chan’s gifts—she gave it to Buyo.

Later, she could not honestly say that she was surprised when Eri, Yuka, and Ayumi appeared around lunchtime with more presents. She had suspected that her mother was putting something together, but was grateful for the thought nonetheless and doubly grateful for the low-key nature of the celebration. It was enough to remind her that her friends and family cared about her, without giving her a headache or making her feel like she needed a six hour nap afterwards. When everyone left, she did take a short catnap to recharge her batteries before going back to the feudal era.

She found Sango in Kaede’s hut, having returned only recently with her fiancé. The taijiya could be seen practically bouncing off the floor in excitement as she knelt with the new kimono laid out before her, carefully making a few alterations. But she folded it up and set it aside in order to share the story with her friend. Obviously the rat-youkai infestation had not been resolved by the time she and Miroku reached the merchant’s home village. In fact, it had only gotten worse. The little creatures had given up their herbivorous ways and had begun taking livestock, an untenable situation for the village. Fortunately, Kirara’s presence seemed to scare off the nocturnal rodents that night. The following morning, the fir-cat located the vermin’s nest, where the whole lot of them slept. Then Sango exterminated the nest using the poison she had prepared the previous evening. Everything was going according to plan until the parents of the rat brood emerged. Their viciousness was matched only by their size, and with each being larger and heavier than a man, that was saying something. Fortunately Sango was ready with hiraikotsu and made short work of them before they could hurt anyone. And thus the rat infestation was ended.

Seeing the two large rat-youkai for the first time had caused the villagers to realize the true extent of their peril, and they insisted that the merchant give Sango the kimono for free. It also helped that Miroku stated that he sensed an ‘ominous presence’ hanging over the village proper and promised to drive it out. He had never given Sango a straight answer when she asked him whether he made that up, but she supposed it didn’t really matter. The village really had been lucky that she showed up when she did, so she didn’t feel guilty about imposing upon the merchant. Seiki surrendered his property with good grace, this time telling Miroku how fortunate he was to be marrying a woman who was as ‘capable as she is beautiful.’ Again, the compliment had no effect on said woman, though Miroku’s quiet acknowledgment of the point did make her blush just a bit.

The couple spent another night in the village before making their way back home the following day, walking part of the way and riding on Kirara for the rest. Before turning in that evening, however, they journeyed to a nearby hot spring which Miroku knew of. In fact, it might even have been the one in which the monk first ‘met’ Kagome and Inuyasha. There, Miroku and Sango bathed together for the first time, though according to the taijiya the monk had been a perfect gentleman…at least with his hands. As for his eyes, Sango didn’t quite believe that Miroku had kept them closed for the entire time he was supposed to—not that she really minded. Especially not when she confessed, after much teasing on Kagome’s part, to taking a _very small_ peek herself.

The miko would have enjoyed teasing her friend some more, but nature had begun calling rather insistently, so she excused herself. She didn’t see Sango duck out of the hut after her and run off with some urgency. By the time Kagome returned, fully intent on wringing from her friend whether she had liked what she had seen in the hot spring, the preparations were complete.

"SURPRISE!!!"

"Kyaa!"

Kagome held her hand against her chest and steadied herself against the doorframe. In the few minutes of her absence, Miroku, Shippou, Kirara, and even Kaede had snuck into the old miko’s hut. And there in the middle of the room sat something which looked suspiciously like a birthday cake. Obviously it wasn’t the same as the one her mother had made for her, this being five hundred years before the modern era. But it was clearly a birthday cake, and this was clearly a surprise party.

"Happy birthday, Kagome!" Shippou exclaimed, his tail practically wagging in exuberance. The others repeated the sentiment, the strange words sounding slightly foreign on their tongues.

Kagome’s knees wobbled, and she moved to sit in the open space they’d left in the circle. Through teary eyes she met each of their gazes in turn, simultaneously overcome with emotion and disbelief. Birthdays weren’t even celebrated in this time period! She couldn’t remember ever mentioning the practice to them, and yet here they were, surprising her with a party.

"H-How did you know?" she managed, sniffling and drying her eyes.

"Some time ago you mentioned in passing the custom of celebrating the anniversary of one’s birth in your time," Miroku stated. "We kept the idea in the back of our minds ever since."

"B-but, that must have been nine months ago!" Kagome exclaimed, now vaguely recalling the conversation.

"Two hundred sixty-three days, to be exact. You showed us on your calendar when it was, and our young Shippou kept track of it all this time." Said fox could be seen puffing out his chest in pride. For a few moments Kagome could think of nothing to say. Part of her still couldn’t believe they had gone to such trouble just to honor a foreign custom, but that was the type of people they were. She was beyond lucky to have them.

"You guys are the best friends I could ever ask for," she declared, managing a watery smile. "Thank you."

"Is it time for presents, Kagome?" Shippou asked excitedly. "When do you open presents? Will you open my present first? Can—"

"Yes, Shippou-chan," Kagome interrupted, amused by his youthful enthusiasm. "We can do presents whenever you want, and I’ll open yours first."

The kit wasted no time in presenting his gifts, though he seemed somewhat nervous as she unwrapped them. Kagome soon discovered why. _At least now I know why he’s been asking me for so many art supplies._ Shippou had given her two paintings, and while they had obviously not been done by the next child prodigy of the art world, it was clear that he had put a lot of time and effort into them. The first was a standard portrait, with each member of the Inu-gang standing together and smiling at the observer. Inuyasha and Miroku stood in the back, with Sango and Kagome in front and Kirara and Shippou held in their respective arms. The other painting was more of an ‘action’ scene. Miroku could be seen with a bright red hand print on his face, his right arm raised and clutching at empty air. Sango stood nearby, her arms folded over her chest in irritation. Further to the left, Inuyasha squatted with Shippou held by the tail in his outstretched hand, gazing down at the rosary around his neck with a look of sudden panic. The power had just started to pull him toward the ground, courtesy of Kagome, who appeared off to the side in the midst of shouting the ‘osuwari’ command.

"I didn’t know if I should include…you know," Shippou muttered. "I can redo them if you want."

"They’re perfect just the way they are, Shippou-chan," Kagome answered honestly. "Inuyasha…is a part of our family even if he’s not here. I’m going to frame these and hang them in my room so I can look at them every day."

Would the pictures remind her of what she was missing? Probably. But they would also inspire memories of happier times, and that would always be welcome. She didn’t want to forget about Inuyasha, after all, and Shippou’s pictures would help her to remember the way things once were, and why she had fallen for her hanyou in the first place.

Kagome loved her other gifts as well. Kaede and Sango gave her some comfortable garments to wear in the feudal era, and Miroku presented her with an elaborate sutra he had made. It consisted of several pieces of paper, and had been crafted in the rough shape of a hawk using a basic form of the complex art of paper folding which would be invented later. If hung in the doorway of a room, the inscriptions written on the paper were said to promote a tranquil atmosphere and ward off negative thoughts. Kagome promised to hang it in her bedroom, since she trusted that Miroku’s work would have some effect. The trick would be preventing her grandfather from taking it down and dissecting it for study.

The friends celebrated through dusk and into the early evening, before Kagome finally called it a night. She hung the pictures and the sutra as promised, and tried on the clothes. As she went to sleep later, she couldn’t help but feel that everything would work out in the end. Whether she had the sutra’s magic or the wonderful people around her to thank for that, she would probably never know. Either way, it was a refreshing change. If she could bring herself to honestly feel this way just once each day, then she would be all right.

* * *

Miroku and Sango’s wedding a week later was everything Kagome could have hoped for. A simple ceremony without much pomp and circumstance, but nevertheless a perfect reflection of the man and woman being joined in matrimony. Sango was nothing short of dazzling in the kimono modeled so closely after her mother’s, and despite his well-kept hair and formal attire, Miroku still exuded the impression of the charming rogue who had won her heart. It was abundantly clear to anyone observing the couple that they were incredibly happy, and deeply in love. Having mentally prepared herself for inevitable feelings of jealousy, Kagome was able to wrap them up and bury them deep inside. This day was for her friends, her beacon of pure light in this world which was perhaps not quite as dreary as she once thought.

As day turned to evening with the festivities showing no sign of abating, a tired Kagome bade her friends a fond farewell and excused herself for the night. She initially declined Miroku’s offer to walk her to the well, but relented when he and Sango insisted. It was a peaceful journey, with the monk relaxing visibly as the sounds of the celebration faded in the distance. Kagome grinned, reflecting how much he must be looking forward to the time when it would be socially acceptable for him to take his bride away from the well-wishers and into his arms, then into their bed. He and Sango were grateful to the villagers of course, but Kagome knew that Miroku wasn’t the only one looking forward to their wedding night.

"What is it?" she asked after finding him staring at her with a contemplative expression.

"Hm? Oh, I was just thinking about how far we’ve come."

"You and Sango-chan especially," Kagome observed with a smile. "From a hopeless letcher to a happily married man in under a year? How the heck did that happen?"

"I don’t think I will ever fully understand it," Miroku stated, only partially in jest.

"Well, make sure you enjoy this part of your life that’s just beginning. Starting with tonight, of course. Remember, I expect my son to have some playmates around his own age."

The last part was intended as a joke, but held elements of seriousness as well. It would be so important for her son to be raised with children who accepted him for who he was, since in all likelihood he would grow up without a father.

"Sango and I will have to get started on that right away then," Miroku replied amusedly, before his expression sobered. He obviously noticed Kagome’s sudden melancholy, and understood the reason behind it.

"Do not lose hope, Kagome-sama," he said, placing his hand on her shoulder. "Inuyasha survived against the odds for as long as he has by being resilient. He has surprised us before, has he not?"

"I suppose," Kagome admitted, allowing the words to soothe away some of her heartache.

It was true that all hope was not lost. It was also true that the odds were once again stacked against Inuyasha. In all likelihood, she would never see him again. Rather than being weighed down by despair, however, she felt determination stir within her. For the sake of her and Inuyasha’s child, she would stay strong. Tomorrow her mother planned a trip to the beach and a ryokan, which would undoubtedly be her longest outing in public since her pregnancy became obvious. After that, she would start attending meetings of the local pregnancy group, also at her mother’s urging. She would do what expectant mothers were supposed to do, on both sides of the bone eater’s well, with the exception of attending regular prenatal appointments. And that also was for her child’s benefit, since his canine features would be even more pronounced at this stage of his development.

At any rate, she was definitely through with lying in bed and feeling sorry for herself. With the help of her friends and family, she would forge a way forward.

* * *

Kikyou eyed him warily, clearly studying him with more than her visual senses. Her bow was in hand, an arrow already laid across the limb just above the grip. She was ready to draw and fire at a moment’s notice, and the look in her eyes told Hakago that she would not hesitate to do so.

It was perfect. Absolutely perfect.

"Hmph. So it is true, then," the dead miko observed calmly. "You really are Naraku’s discarded heart."

Hakago cackled, making sure to speak with the most feral version of Inuyasha’s voice he could muster. He prowled back and forth before his prey, like a restless predator seeking the perfect moment to pounce.

"Indeed, I was once a part of Naraku. But I am greater than my foolish predecessor ever was. Today I will finish what he could not. I’m going to tear you into so many pieces that not even the Kami themselves will be able to resurrect you again."

He felt Inuyasha’s resistance rise within him, dark and desperate. But he also sensed the hanyou’s fear. _That’s right, you worthless half-breed. I’m going to kill one of the women you love with your own claws, and there’s nothing you can do about it._

"How amusing," Kikyou declared, her tone suggesting just the opposite. "Naraku could not kill me, and neither can his infant spawn. I will drive you out of Inuyasha and purify you. Then I will take Inuyasha to the underworld with me."

"Ah, but will Inuyasha go with you willingly?" Hakago pondered, seeking to get under his adversary’s skin. Kikyou’s eyes narrowed slightly but she otherwise gave no indication that his words affected her.

"It matters not. Once his soul has been reunited with mine in the underworld, he will realize that by my side is where he truly belongs. You, on the other hand, will be forgotten. No one will mourn you, or remember your name. It will be as though you never existed."

"I’m going to make you eat those words, bitch," Hakago snarled, tamping down on his irritation. How could an abomination raised from the dead in an artificial body be so arrogant? _Before I kill you, Kikyou, I’m going to savor the look on your face when you realize how weak you really are._

And with Kikyou’s demise, the remnants of Inuyasha’s resistance would fade away like so much dust in the wind. He was so close to final victory; he could practically taste it when he licked his lips in anticipation.

Fangs bared, eyes ablaze with malicious fire, he circled his prey.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I hope I haven’t Americanized Japanese birthdays too much. I know that celebrating birthdays was a western import starting in the twentieth century. But Kagome’s family seemed to have adopted the custom somewhat (i.e. Jii-chan giving her fully-wrapped gift in chapter one of the manga), so I don’t think I’m too off base here. 
> 
> For those of you waiting for the action to resume, look forward to next chapter! You can tell that something big will happen just by how this chapter ended. I tried to cover the last 2-3 months of timeline as quickly as I felt comfortable with, while also showing some things which I thought were important. For example, I don’t think I would be doing Kagome’s character justice if I didn’t show her struggle with grief, and her ultimate resolve to move past it.


	43. A No-Win Situation

A brief lesson in military tactics. Conventional wisdom said that archers were best used to rain down death upon enemies from a distance. They were vulnerable in close quarters combat, and would be swiftly massacred if an opponent was able to catch them with cavalry or even melee infantry. But those rules only applied to battles between human armies; small-scale warfare was different. The trick when facing an archer was still to close the distance, but actually achieving that objective could be difficult in practice. Especially when you were the archer’s only target, and your enemy was well-trained. You had to get in close to win, but the closer you got to the archer, the harder it became to avoid her projectiles. It was an interesting dilemma to say the least.

Kikyou’s first arrow had nearly crippled him. He’d taken barely two steps toward her before she released it, but even at that distance it had taken lightning reflexes to avoid it. His reflexes were fortunately up to the task, but in his excitement he foolishly underestimated the swath of pure energy which would inevitably trail behind the projectile. Kikyou’s reiki seemed to burn right through his fire-rat robes, tendrils of pink light crackling and scorching the flesh underneath. He’d been lucky that only the trailing edge had caught him, causing a painful but otherwise harmless injury. A sufficiently large dose of reiki, however, would purify him completely. While Hakago couldn’t say exactly what would happen in that situation, he could make an educated guess based on his experiences during the new moon. At those times, Inuyasha’s body reverted to that of a human and his youki, which was the source of his resistance, vanished entirely. Hakago was left in complete control of a human body, and was able to use the natural powers he’d been born with, chief among them erecting a barrier for protection.

The thought of being purified by Kikyou filled him with dread. If he reverted to human form, he didn’t completely trust his own barrier to keep her at bay until Inuyasha’s youki returned. And if his barrier did fall, he would be completely at the dead miko’s mercy. She might very well be able to restrain him with her shinidamachu and force him out of Inuyasha’s body with her reiki.

There was no way he was going to allow that to happen. He supposed he could simply blow her away with a Kaze no Kizu, but that would be incredibly unsatisfying. How was he supposed to get any enjoyment from Kikyou’s death if she was there one moment and then disintegrated in the next? He wouldn’t even get to see her face! He needed to do more to crush Inuyasha’s spirit, or the hanyou might continue to fight him. Besides, the familiar lust for battle was already coursing through his veins. This was one of those rare opportunities for him to truly enjoy himself, and he was not about to squander it because of a little danger. The peril actually made life more enjoyable, he found.

That didn’t mean he would charge at Kikyou again without a plan. He was neither stupid nor suicidal. He just needed to fight to his advantages, of which there were several. The most obvious one was his tremendous edge in power and speed, which would afford Kikyou only one chance to fire. If she missed, he would be on top of her before she had time to draw another arrow. That only held true for a clean miss, of course; as he’d already discovered, a near miss would impart enough reiki upon him to slow him down or even stop him in his tracks. He did, however, possess excellent reflexes and a level of intelligence which he was sure that Kikyou was underestimating. And finally, he wielded both the Shikon no Tama and Tetsusaiga, formidable weapons in their own right which could prove decisive if used correctly. But for now, Hakago decided to make one more attempt to close the distance using Inuyasha’s innate abilities only.

He crept forward cautiously, testing how close Kikyou would let him come before releasing her arrow. She watched him with narrowed eyes, never flinching or giving any indication that she was about to fire. There seemed to be no fatigue in her clay body; she stood still as a statue, as though she could hold that pose for days, or until the bowstring snapped under the strain. Finally Hakago reached what he sensed to be the point of no return. If he moved much closer, he probably wouldn’t be able to dodge Kikyou’s arrow if it was aimed at the center of his body. He paused for a moment, debating whether to attempt to cross the remaining distance with some sort of evasive maneuver. Then Kikyou fired.

With an audible cry he threw himself to the ground, using gravity and every ounce of agility he possessed to move out of the projectile’s path. Searing pain arced across his back, though it was clear that the arrow had missed and only the reiki had struck him. If he had not caught himself on his hands and knees, the next arrow would have pierced his flesh and likely driven the youki from his body in a burst of blinding agony. As it was, maintaining some degree of balance enabled him to roll out of the incoming projectile’s path and lurch to his feet. He then beat a hasty retreat, moving backward with measured leaps. Perhaps disappointed by her failure, Kikyou fired another arrow which at the greater distance was more easily dodged by her opponent. She cursed quietly, probably berating herself for the ill-advised waste of ammunition. Then she armed herself once more, adopting the cool and deadly stance which Hakago had first found her in.

The former infant breathed heavily, golden eyes ablaze with the thrill of his close escape. Logically, he should probably be frightened by the near disaster. But his excitement drowned out any fear, a violent lust reinvigorating his muscles and fueling his thundering heartbeat. His mind remained as composed and calculating as ever, as he processed the information he had learned about his enemy. First, he had confirmed his initial hypothesis about the imaginary point of no return. An accurate arrow fired from a shorter distance would likely have purified him, either directly or with a heavy dose of residual reiki. At the very least, it would have knocked him off balance enough so that Kikyou’s next projectile could finish the job. But on the other hand, the dead miko was trying to conserve ammunition. An interesting dilemma confronted her as well; she would likely need multiple shots in order to defeat him, but only possessed a finite stock of arrows to begin with. Hakago couldn’t tell the exact figure, but she’d started with close to a full quiver, which likely meant two dozen at least. Four had already been spent, and he had yet to suffer any significant damage. His body had already shaken off the reiki from the near misses, and was ready for action once more.

He would not, however, be employing the same strategy again. Too many things could go wrong. Even if he approached with evasive maneuvers, if Kikyou guessed right he was done for. So no, conventional means were not likely to meet with success. It was time to break out his secret weapon, something which the dead miko could not possibly have anticipated or devised a counterstrategy for. With a flourish he drew Tetsusaiga, then pulled the Shikon no Tama from his robes. Kikyou observed warily, her eyes widening slightly in alarm as the jewel’s corruption crept up the blade. But she could do nothing as Tetsusaiga and its wielder transformed in a burst of evil energy. Hakago wasted no time in charging toward his prey. There was a time limit on using this ability, after all, and if he didn’t defeat Kikyou before Inuyasha’s caged beast forced him to revert to hanyou form again, then he’d be right back where he started.

Kikyou’s first arrow clanged off Tetsusaiga’s blade less than a half meter above the hilt, causing the sword to howl in agony as the force of the accompanying reiki knocked its wielder slightly off balance. Hakago stumbled but kept coming, slowly drawing closer and closer to his target each time Kikyou paused to reload. After seeing three projectiles blocked by the blade, she lowered her aim and tried to take out his legs. That forced Hakago to alter his approach, whereupon his opponent raised her aim once more and fired at his chest. This pattern repeated itself several times until Hakago leapt back a few steps to break the cycle. By then he could almost make out each individual arrow in Kikyou’s quiver; no more than a dozen remained, by his estimate.

Snarling with renewed vigor, Hakago charged again, this time at an angle to the left. Kikyou tracked his movement, the tip of her arrow glinting in the waning light. Wanting to experiment, Hakago faked to the right on a path which would take him toward his prey, then juked abruptly back to the left. He was prepared to block with Tetsusaiga, but Kikyou’s arrow missed badly, passing through the spot where he would have been if he hadn’t changed direction that last time. His actual course didn’t get him much closer to her, but that was another arrow wasted without further strain upon Tetsusaiga, which still throbbed in pained protest. He wasn’t sure how much more bludgeoning the sword could take before Kikyou’s reiki forced it to revert back to its dormant state, and he didn’t plan on finding out.

The next couple minutes passed quickly for our two combatants. Hakago remained constantly in motion, attempting to change direction as often and as randomly as possible as he gradually worked his way closer. Kikyou understood what he was up to and spent her ammunition more carefully after that first errant shot. Hakago was able to dodge a few, but was forced to block the majority with Tetsusaiga. The sword was obviously not pleased about this, and soon it became apparent to both combatants that the mighty youkai blade was nearing its limit. Would it last long enough to deflect Kikyou’s final three arrows? The outcome of the battle might hinge on the answer to that question.

Hakago pushed himself as hard as he could, pulling out every trick he knew to throw off Kikyou’s aim. But the miko was unshakable, putting the next two arrows right on his chest. The second was the final straw for Tetsusaiga, which transformed with a final mournful howl. Not even the power of the Shikon no Tama flowing through the blade was able to protect it from the accumulated reiki of over a dozen impacts. Hakago skidded to a halt as Kikyou drew her final arrow, hanyou and miko facing each other for perhaps the final time. Hakago breathed heavily, every muscle in his body tensed. He didn’t even dare to blink, as close as he was to the imaginary point of no return. Perhaps he had crossed it already; he couldn’t be sure. What he was sure of was that Tetsusaiga would be of no help to him anymore; he would have to rely on his own strength and that of the Shikon no Tama. He sheathed the useless sword, waiting for Kikyou to release her final arrow.

She didn’t fire. It took Hakago only a few moments to realize why. Kikyou must have comprehended the truth behind his full-youkai transformation; she probably sensed the caged beast raging within, clawing its way out of its hanyou prison. With Hakago’s mental capacity taxed by the fury of the battle, Inuyasha’s full-youkai essence had grown dangerously close to overwhelming the infant’s defenses. He could not remain in this form for much longer, and Kikyou knew it. That was why she held her arrow, correctly assuming that it would be easier to hit a normal hanyou than one temporarily transformed into a full-youkai. His physical abilities were impressive in either form, but definitely received a boost when the caged beast came out to play.

Hakago cursed under his breath, surreptitiously scanning his surroundings as he settled on a strategy. He discovered several interesting things, but pushed the knowledge to the back of his mind. None of the information would do him any good unless he could dodge Kikyou’s last arrow. Finally, he settled on a strategy for his approach. He darted to the right, cutting and juking erratically, finally turning and running toward his quarry for half a step before digging his claws into the ground and throwing himself violently in the other direction. When he landed, expecting that Kikyou had fired her last arrow and was now defenseless, he instead found the tip of the projectile pointed directly at the center of his chest, her cold eyes seeming to grin smugly at him though her lips remained as pursed and emotionless as ever. A flash of icy fear passed through Hakago’s gut; at this distance, even full-youkai Inuyasha’s feet would be unable to propel his body out of the way. Just as he realized this, Kikyou fired.

The arrow lanced in, its reiki filling his vision with blinding light. In desperation, Hakago swung his dominant right hand out of reflex, which as luck would have it still held the Shikon no Tama. Time seemed to freeze as the two fundamentally opposing forces clashed. Hakago’s fist struck the arrow on the shaft just behind the point. Absent the Shikon no Tama, the desperate flailing swat would have been repulsed by Kikyou’s reiki and the arrow would have continued on to bury itself in Hakago’s chest, purifying Inuyasha’s body completely. But the corrupted jewel held power of its own, and the evil which currently possessed it did not suffer reiki to pass.

It happened in an instant, a detonation of light and energy which could be seen and heard for over a kilometer. But as a fierce wind buffeted him, pulling at his hair and clothing, Hakago kept his eyes open and witnessed the miracle. Kikyou’s reiki and the dark power of the Shikon no Tama were fairly evenly matched, that much was obvious. But this was not a head-on contest of strength. The arrow bearing the reiki rushed forward, while Hakago’s fist struck it from the side, the jewel’s power allowing him to use the projectile’s own momentum against it. The arrow deflected, flying past his left side to skip along the ground, its trailing reiki blasting him with purity. But it was not enough, either to cripple him or to purify his body. Kikyou had failed.

There was no panic in her expression, however, as Hakago discovered when he recovered his balance and began moving toward her. And he knew why. Kikyou had indeed underestimated his intelligence, and specifically his awareness of his surroundings. She didn’t think he had counted the shinidamachu circling overhead before the battle, or noticed when one of them snuck off into the trees. She didn’t believe he had heard the tiny sound of an arrowhead being withdrawn from the bark of a tree, or anticipated her final last-ditch plan. He knew exactly what she had in mind. He would charge in recklessly, blinded by impending victory and his own desire for the kill. Just before he reached her, an arrow would drop from the sky courtesy of her sly shinidamachu, and she would fire it at him from point-blank range. That would undoubtedly spell the end of the Great Hakago. If the purifying arrow did not kill him outright, Kikyou would finish the job soon after. Obviously, he was having none of that, though he did continue his charge. The shinidamachu moved to overtake him, arcing in toward its mistress from the side. Hakago was ready for it. His right hand was already covered in blood from its clash with the last arrow. It was perfect.

Kikyou cried out in dismay as the crimson blades of the Hijin Ketsusou tore through her servant and its precious cargo. Her composure broke spectacularly, her expression revealing fear for the first time. Hakago drank it in, the sights and sounds, and determined that he would wring much more despair from Kikyou before he let her die. Now barely a meter separating them, he drew back his fist and plunged it forward. She raised her bow to ward him off, the weapon glowing with reiki, but it might as well have been made of paper. His fist powered through the bow, snapping the wood and slamming into the artificial flesh underneath. A choked cry escaped Kikyou as she was thrown back several meters, skidding to a halt on her back. She lay on the ground unmoving, stunned by the blow despite her lack of lungs and other vital organs.

Hakago cackled maliciously, his eyes darkening to a more sadistic shade of red. But as enjoyable as it would be to shred Kikyou’s artificial body in Inuyasha’s full-youkai form, it was inadvisable for two reasons. The first was obvious—maintaining the transformation any longer would put his mind in real jeopardy. Beyond that, this was the perfect chance to rid himself of Inuyasha’s lingering consciousness once and for all. If he overcame the hanyou’s resistance using the Shikon no Tama or the power of the caged beast, it would provide him with an excuse. Inuyasha might remember the other woman he needed to fight for, and take solace in the fact that only by using dirty tricks had Hakago managed to end Kikyou’s life by his own claws. Perhaps he would be able to fight harder for the other woman he loved, and for his unborn child?

Hakago obviously didn’t wish to grant his prisoner any reason to hope. This wasn’t about simply killing Kikyou; it was about proving to Inuyasha how weak and helpless he truly was. And the only way to do that was to carry out the act while in hanyou form, while Inuyasha’s resistance was at its peak. If he could beat Inuyasha using nothing but his own willpower, then the hanyou would fall into despair, and final victory would be his.

Decision made, Hakago dropped the Shikon no Tama. Instantly the transformation receded, and Inuyasha’s resistance intensified. He knew what his captor had planned, and was giving everything he had in order to prevent it. But it wasn’t enough. _That’s right, Inuyasha. I’m going to slaughter your precious Kikyou with your own claws. For the second time, your weakness will cause the death of the woman you love. Go ahead and fight me. Scratch and claw, struggle with all your might. Then, when you have failed Kikyou yet again, collapse under the crushing weight of despair!_

After stooping to pick up the Shikon no Tama, Hakago strode confidently toward his fallen prey, Inuyasha’s fury proving no more of a hindrance than a stiff wind in his face. Kikyou had regained her senses and tried to rise, but he wrapped his left hand around her neck and slammed her to the ground. Then he picked her up by the throat and dragged her over to a nearby tree, pinning her against the trunk. Her hands came up to pull futilely at his wrist, for although her artificial body did not need air, her slender neck could only take so much abuse before it literally fell apart. Gale force winds buffeted him then, as his free right hand moved toward Kikyou’s chest. He would sink his claws into her flesh, then tear her open and watch as the trapped souls escaped her. He would savor every moment of sorrow as she gradually faded into nothingness.

Moving his right hand was like pushing a boulder, but progress was steady. Within thirty seconds his claws brushed up against the front of Kikyou’s robes. In another half minute they scraped the dead flesh underneath. When the claw on his middle finger began to sink into Kikyou’s body, however, Inuyasha’s resistance rose another level, bringing his progress to a halt. The hanyou’s desperation nearly pushed him back, but he refused to retreat. With a great effort which drew a determined snarl from his throat, Hakago threw all of his formidable willpower to the grisly task at hand. In moments, the titanic clash of wills came to its climax. A choked gasp escaped Kikyou as his claws tore through her flesh, burying themselves in the bark at her back.

Inuyasha’s despairing wail reverberated through Hakago’s mind, a cross between the inconsolable cry of a man and the mournful howl of an inu-youkai. How fitting, Hakago reflected, that his final lament should be a combination of human and youkai, the very contradiction which made him such a weakling in the first place. Never had a sound been so beautiful. A more perfect end for a hated adversary had never been devised. Hakago observed gleefully as Inuyasha fell, stumbling to his proverbial knees as tears flowed down his cheeks. He was so close now…one final push would break him completely.

But Kikyou was not yet defeated, and she obviously had no intention of becoming the reason for her beloved’s demise. Her hands came to rest on Hakago’s shoulders, releasing a torrent of reiki which simultaneously paralyzed him and set his nerves afire with pain. This was the danger associated with not killing the miko quickly; if she had time to recover, she could prove deadly in close quarters, where her lack of a weapon did not matter. Hakago, however, was no fool. He had never expected Kikyou to go down without a fight. He had wagered that his own youki would be formidable enough to repulse his enemy’s reiki, augmented as it was by the Shikon no Tama. For the jewel was completely corrupted now, and responded willingly to its master’s aura. In short, the evil will of the Shikon no Tama did not _want_ to be purified.

Lashing out accordingly, the jewel’s power knocked Kikyou’s reiki back. Combining with Hakago’s youki, the two forces drove the miko to the breaking point. Gritting her teeth, she threw in the last of her power, managing to draw the ebb and flow of the cataclysmic conflict to a standstill. But it was clear that Kikyou would weaken long before either Hakago or the jewel did. And once her reiki receded more fully from his form, the paralysis would dissipate and he would be free to finish what he had started when he sunk his claws into her chest.

A sudden disturbing sensation from the depths of his mind alerted him that something was amiss. Turning his attention inward, he discovered a foreign presence slithering through his consciousness, a serpent seeking its mate. It was Kikyou’s reiki. _She…she’s looking for Inuyasha!_ Her attempts to purify him were merely a distraction; she’d likely known that the effort was futile on her own and had pinned her hopes on freeing her hanyou companion trapped within his own body. In this she would be disappointed. Kikyou could no more liberate Inuyasha than she could save herself from her own foolishness. No one with a heart as bitter and corrupt as hers could hope to overcome the power of the Great Hakago, heir to Naraku and master of the Shikon no Tama! Kikyou’s own selfish desires to drag Inuyasha to hell with her, whether by his will or against it, would be her undoing. In attempting to reach the man she professed to love, she had exposed her mind and heart to foreign invasion. It was an opportunity too perfect to pass up. Summoning his most innate ability, the power which had already corrupted the hearts of two individuals far purer than Kikyou herself, Hakago struck.

In an instant, he smashed through Kikyou’s defenses and grasped her heart in his hand, at once gaining access to every emotion, everything which made her who she was. Flush with success, he paused briefly to ridicule his victim before beginning his work.

"Poor, poor Kikyou. You survived Naraku’s poison, only to be killed by the man you love. How does it feel? The bitter sting of betrayal, the knowledge that your own weakness has doomed the only person you ever cared about in this world. Will you let me taste it?"

There was no response. Dimly Hakago felt a pair of slender arms wrap around the shoulders of his physical body, as if Kikyou was embracing him. The potency of her reiki did not deteriorate in the slightest. Deciding that her lack of reaction to his words was an anomaly, Hakago shrugged mentally and delved into her consciousness. He would find the darkness in Kikyou’s heart, and then her stubborn resolve would collapse like a castle made of sand.

No obvious source of darkness was apparent upon his initial inspection, so he probed deeper. Still no darkness appeared, so he intensified his efforts. Time passed slowly, each second driving his anxiety gradually higher. What was going on? Each avenue pursued led only to a dead end. No matter what he tried, he could find no darkness.

How did that make any sense? Kikyou was the tragic priestess! She had loathed her duty of guarding the Shikon no Tama so much that she stooped to associating with a hanyou, finding companionship in the only person on Earth as lonely as her. Then she had betrayed him, allowing mistrust to fester until Naraku came along with a simple trick that any well-trained miko should have seen through easily. She pinned the man she professed to love to a tree for fifty years, though he was completely innocent in her death. After her resurrection, she tried to drag Inuyasha to hell, handed Naraku the Shikon no Tama, and generally behaved like a vindictive, bitter old shrew. Her actions had directly or indirectly contributed to her former love being placed in mortal danger many times, and in blind rage she had nearly killed an innocent woman and her unborn child. How could there possibly be no darkness in this monster’s heart?

"It has to be here," Hakago muttered to himself, searching frantically through Kikyou’s subconscious now. "Where is it? Where is it?!"

_"You will find no darkness within me."_

"Kikyou, you bitch!" he cried, raging against her disembodied voice, so smug and calm that it made him want to level a whole forest or massacre a village just to relieve his anger. "That’s not possible! Your desire to take Inuyasha to hell is corrupt in and of itself!"

_"I have moved beyond such desires. I am no longer the woman I used to be."_

Hakago’s mind slowed to a crawl. Could Kikyou’s words be true? _No! She said herself that she wanted to take Inuyasha to hell. She was telling the truth then!_ Or was she? His nose had confirmed Kikyou’s statement at the time to be genuine, or so he’d thought. But already he had been focused on the thrill of battle, and the chance to mess with an adversary’s head beforehand. Kikyou’s scent had remained constant, and her words had given no indication of untruth. But had he missed something, a telltale sign? A slight fluctuation in her scent or body language to indicate that perhaps she was not speaking as truthfully as he might otherwise believe? It seemed impossible. He was the Great Hakago. He had defeated Kagome, Inuyasha, Sesshoumaru, and Kikyou by using his formidable wit, an intelligence which far surpassed any of them. How could he have missed such a crucial detail? It was impossible, he assured himself then. Kikyou was just unusually skilled at hiding the darkness in her heart. But he would find it. And when he did, he would make her suff—

_"Inuyasha."_

Hakago gasped, turning his gaze inward once more. With dread settling in his proverbial stomach, he discovered that the tendril of Kikyou’s reiki had nearly reached its target. He could see the two of them now. Inuyasha lay on his side, curled up in a ball and weeping bitterly. His skin held an ethereal quality; he was almost ready to fade away. Kikyou stood in front of him, her hand outstretched, her face showing the strain of maintaining her reiki. But her voice was sweet and soothing, like a mother calling to a frightened child.

_"Inuyasha, it is all right. Take my hand."_

Inuyasha’s bone-wracking sobs ceased abruptly. He lifted his head, staring at Kikyou with puffy eyes full of wonder. He sniffed once, then shifted his body, slowly raising himself into a kneeling position. Cautiously he began to crawl toward Kikyou on his hands and knees, his eyes wary but gradually filling with a new emotion. Hope.

Hakago swore aloud, redoubling his efforts. There had to be darkness. There had to be!

"Don’t think you’ve won, Kikyou!" he cried, nevertheless failing to keep the fear from his tone. "Why do you think I was able to take control of Inuyasha’s body in the first place? He raped the woman he _truly_ loves while she begged him not to. And that’s something the worthless half-breed will never be able to forget!"

Hakago expected his words to cause Inuyasha to collapse once more into a blubbering hanyou-shaped ball. But the hanyou only continued to crawl toward Kikyou. It was as though Hakago’s words could no longer reach him. There was, however, a reaction within Kikyou’s heart. The environment shook, and the light permeating this place brightened even further, becoming blinding in its intensity. Pure terror settled over Hakago. He had seen this light before, long ago in another person’s heart. He had marveled at the purity even back then, but had overcome it by discovering a thread of darkness. Here, there existed no such thread. Only light, absolute and impenetrable. But how could this be? What was this light doing here inside Kikyou of all people? This light which so closely resembled that which belonged to…to…

"Kagome…" he muttered in disbelief. Her face swam before his eyes, wearing an expression of complete tranquility, and he realized that the impossible had become reality.

_"That’s it, Inuyasha. Take my hand. Remember."_

"No!" Hakago screamed, struggling to return to his own mind and avert the impending disaster. But his power had deserted him, and he could not push his way through the reiki. Instead, he observed from afar as Inuyasha knelt before Kikyou, and stretched out his hand.

"No! No! Nononono! Noooooooooooooooo!!!"

The two hands, hanyou and human, made contact. Hakago’s chest instantly exploded in pain, as though a foreign being was trying to claw its way out of his body. Merely touching Kikyou had strengthened Inuyasha this much?

His frantic efforts to suppress the hanyou proved unsuccessful. He could only watch helplessly as Inuyasha and Kikyou locked eyes, the miko smiling down at him with genuine love dancing in her dark orbs. It was an expression which no one had ever seen her adopt before, not even the man currently being graced by it. Perhaps for the first time, she could gaze upon Inuyasha with true love in her heart.

"No…Kami, please…no…"

His pleas went unanswered.

 _"Be at peace, Inuyasha,"_ Kikyou soothed, her smile never wavering. _"Remember. Remember what truly occurred that night."_

Inuyasha blinked once, then his gaze turned contemplative. And Hakago’s world turned on its head.

_She lay beneath him on the futon, her raven locks fanned haphazardly around her. Her bare breasts heaved with her breathing, covered in a fine sheen of sweat. Her breath came in shallow pants, passing through lips bruised from rough treatment. Her cheeks were flushed, but her expression was not one of embarrassment. Her scent coiled around him, sadness and despair tinged with hints of arousal. Her eyes matched her scent perfectly, tearful and pleading. She shifted slightly, reminding Inuyasha of his own position. He leaned over her, as naked as she was, supporting his upper body with hands braced against the futon on either side of her head. Her right hand was clutched in his left, the hold awkward and undoubtedly uncomfortable for her as he pinned it to the futon. He knelt between her parted legs, his hardness pressed against her thigh, leaving no doubt as to what he had been about to do before something stopped him. Perhaps it had been Kagome’s left hand grasping his bicep, her fingernails digging into the muscle._

_"Please, Inuyasha, don’t…"_

_Her voice trailed off then, and she bit her lower lip. That she was too embarrassed to speak what she was asking him not to do pissed him off. So he wasn’t going to do her any favors. She could fill in her own damn blanks._

_"Don’t what, wench?" he snapped, causing her to cringe at the harshness of his tone. A part of him felt guilty for it; this was difficult for her as well, after all. But he was too frustrated to let go of his anger._

_This officially sucked. He was drunk. And he was a virgin. He’d never been with a woman before, and had doubted it would ever happen. Yet not fifteen seconds ago, a goddess had lain naked before him, ready to prove him wrong. A gorgeous young woman who happened to be someone very special to him, was willing to share her body with him. Of all the men she could have in two separate worlds, she wanted her first sexual experience to be with him. It boggled the mind. But there was no denying her attraction to him, or the love he swore he saw in her eyes when she looked at him. A frenzied few minutes of messy drunken kisses and awkwardly removing each other’s clothes had only increased their mutual fervor._

_A part of him always suspected that Kagome would come to her senses before they actually completed the act, that she would realize what a mistake she was making before they joined as man and woman—or hanyou and woman. But Kagome never asked him to stop, never lent any credence to his subconscious self-loathing. And even when his insecurities drove him to look up to her face one last time as he positioned himself at her entrance, her eyes never reflected anything but love and adoration. Her smile in that moment was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. She loved him, truly loved him, and had wanted to join with him in the most intimate way possible. She still did, in fact. Hence the reason why he was so irritated._

_Kagome couldn’t make this easy, could she? Was it so much to ask for her to just accept his decision without question? That is, the decision he’d made fifteen torturous seconds ago that he and Kagome couldn’t have sex. No matter how ridiculously beautiful she was, or how alluring her scent, or how aroused they both were, he needed to stop this before it was too late. Kagome was drunk too. She would regret this in the morning. How could she not? Giving her virginity to a trusted friend in some strange hut in the middle of feudal Japan, while intoxicated no less? That ‘trusted friend’ status would go right into the fire if he went through with this. He would be lucky if she didn’t hate him. Even if she miraculously forgave him for taking advantage of her, he would never forgive himself._

_How these thoughts had ever managed to work their way through his inebriated consciousness, Inuyasha would never know. Perhaps some deep-seated protective instinct had emerged at the moment when it was needed most. Either way he was grateful; it would save him from making a terrible mistake. That is, unless he gave into the temptress lying beneath him. He needed to get out of here now—throw on his clothes, run several kilometers and submerge himself in the coldest body of water he could find. He could wind up dry humping a glacier for all he cared, so long as he didn’t cause Kagome to hate him._

_He almost pulled it off—almost managed to move away from her and make his escape. Ultimately it wasn’t her enticing appearance or the scent of her arousal perfuming the air which caused him to stay. It was the way her eyes dimmed with dejection, the sorrow which leaked into her scent. Her pleading tone, the way her voice nearly cracked with repressed emotion…all of it told him that the reason for her reaction ran far deeper than unrequited sexual need. He had hurt her somehow, and he owed it to her to stay and try to make it better._

_"I…" she trailed off, again unable to form a coherent sentence._

_"Dammit, Kagome," he said, his voice far gentler than his words. "We can’t do this. You’ll thank me in the morning."_

_She shook her head so violently that her eyes became unfocused and it took several seconds for her inebriated mind to regain some semblance of ocular control. Inuyasha found that downright adorable, but was not pleased by her continued refusal to accept his decision. Didn’t she know that he was only doing what was best for her? He opened his mouth to tell her just that, but she spoke softly in a voice barely above a whisper, the gravity of her words stilling his tongue._

_"Please, Inuyasha…just for one night…I want to feel like I’m not second best."_

_Inuyasha’s world nearly imploded. How…how was he supposed to respond to that? There was so much wrong with her statement. But it was all his fault. Every insecurity, every element of misery she held deep inside, was his fault. How could he deny her? It was, after all, his responsibility to comfort her._

_Inuyasha practically heard the sharp sound of his fragile resolve snapping. He dove into Kagome’s waiting embrace, further bruising her lips with the force of his desperate kiss. She cried out when he entered her and he kissed her temple in apology. But his body was throbbing with need, and with his mind clouded by the alcohol, he lacked the willpower to restrain himself completely._

_He was not gentle with her, but nor was he cruel. In the future she would probably come to enjoy this type of lovemaking. But this was her first time, and the discomfort caused by the newness of the act prevented her from deriving much physical enjoyment from it. Still she clung to him, her scent swelling with happiness tempered by pain. Her hands roamed up and down his back as she encouraged him to find his own completion. Inuyasha was powerless to resist. He buried his head in her shoulder and thrust into her body, biting his lip with the effort to keep from being too rough. Blessedly for both of them, his release came upon him quickly, within a couple minutes at most. He climaxed with an uncontrollable growl, wrung from him by the pleasure coursing through his body._

_When his orgasm finally subsided, he flopped onto the futon on his side, making sure not to crush his lover. Lover…he had a lover now. It boggled the mind. He opened his eyes to find her still smiling at him, as she mirrored his position on the other side of the futon. The lingering scent of her blood in the air caused him to drop his gaze in shame._

_"Sorry," he mumbled, hoping she understood. Her hand reached out to cup his cheek, drawing his eyes back up to hers. Once she had his attention, she shook her head._

_"S’okay," she told him honestly. "First time?"_

_He nodded in response, somehow not feeling the slightest embarrassment about the admission. Perhaps it was the way Kagome’s already brilliant smile widened even further._

_"I’m glad. Mine too."_

_"Kagome," he breathed. "Thank you." Turning his head to the side, he planted a light kiss on her palm. The action caused her cheeks to tint noticeably from their already rosy hue, which was odd given what they’d just done. But Inuyasha found it adorable nonetheless. Suddenly he wanted to kiss her again, a desire which unlike before had nothing to do with lust. Kagome’s eyes widened as she read his expression, her smile fading slightly with the magnitude of what she was about to say._

_"I love you, Inuyasha."_

_Again, he was struck speechless. The only thing he could think to say was her name. And the only thing he could think to do was lean in to kiss her. The encounter was neither chaste nor especially graceful, but it was sweet and thick with passion. This was the type of kiss which spoke of deep feelings left unspoken, of how a man truly felt about the person he loved. It was how he should have been kissing her all along. But in this fleeting utopia, there was no room for regret. He and Kagome loved each other. There would be a ‘next time,’ and he would do better. Much better. Together, they would discover how to truly ‘make love.’ And someday soon, he would find the courage to tell her how much he loved her. He fully intended to show her every day, but the words mattered too._

_Eventually they pulled apart, but only so they could cuddle together and rest their exhausted bodies. They quickly drifted off to peaceful slumber, knowing that the morning would bring new challenges. But as long as they remembered this night, this love, they would be okay._

Hakago realized the moment that Inuyasha’s exploration of his own memory ended. The hanyou’s brow furrowed, his golden eyes regaining their lost luster. He gazed up at Kikyou in consternation, as if wondering whether everything he had seen was really true. Whatever he saw in her expression must have confirmed it for him, because in the next moment he could be seen angrily wiping his tears away. He rose to his feet, the unadulterated fury in his stance causing the proverbial hairs to stand on the back of Hakago’s neck. If he had been in possession of a physical body when Inuyasha and Kikyou clasped hands and turned to face him, he would have wet himself.

They assaulted him then, Kikyou’s reiki now buoyed by Inuyasha’s youki. Hakago struggled against the onrushing current, but the hanyou’s willpower was too great. It was not blind rage which drove Inuyasha, but something far more potent, something held dear to his heart. In the end, all Hakago could do was curl into a ball and cry.

Suddenly he was in freefall, a disturbing sensation which did not last very long. It was, however, infinitely more pleasant than impacting the ground on his back. Though it hurt, it did no real damage to his youki-strengthened body. His head did feel rather swollen, however. He reached up with his hands and discovered that his skull was far too big in comparison to the rest of him. He tried to roll onto his front, but found that he lacked the strength. Why couldn’t he move? And why was the canopy above so far away? Every muscle in his body froze as he realized that he recognized this feeling. The sensation of utter helplessness, of being trapped in a useless body with little hope of escape… _I…I’m an infant again._

Hakago sobbed once, twice. Then he began to scream.

* * *

Inuyasha groaned, picking himself up onto his hands and knees but not daring to rise any further until the pounding in his temples subsided a bit. He felt like shit, as though an oni had spent the last half-day beating him with a club. That he could not initially recall how he’d wound up in such sorry shape was worrisome, so he spent the next several seconds attempting to piece his memory back together.

A titanic gasp escaped him. Once he exhaled that air, he drew in another deep breath, simply because for the first time in over three months, he possessed the ability to do so. He raised his right hand off the ground, holding it in front of his face and flexing the fingers repeatedly as a grin of pure relief spread across his features. _I’m back in control of my own body. I’m…finally me again._

A high-pitched keening wail had him diving to the side, covering his ears with his hands. A glance in the direction of the source revealed a familiar-looking infant lying on the ground, crying loud enough to be heard for kilometers in every direction. Inuyasha, however, did not feel even an iota of sympathy for the little cretin. Taking in the rest of his surroundings, he spotted Kikyou lying nearby, propped up against the base of a tree. Her eyes were closed and he couldn’t tell if she was conscious. He buried his initial inclination to go to her. There was one thing he needed to take care of first.

Rising gingerly to his feet, Inuyasha took a moment to stretch out his senses. Upon detecting no sign of any other presence nearby, he turned to the task at hand. His fingers closed reverentially around Tetsusaiga’s hilt, reacquainting himself with the feel of the bindings against his skin. Then he drew the sword and transformed it in one smooth motion, unable to contain a fleeting smile of pure joy. But it was not to last. Awed by the display of power, the infant suddenly ceased his cries and stared up at Inuyasha with wide, frightened eyes. The hanyou reciprocated the gaze, his expression hard and unforgiving, but not cruel.

"You don’t deserve this, Hakago," he snarled. "But I’ll give you a quick death."

The infant drew in a huge breath to unleash an equally massive scream, but Inuyasha plunged Tetsusaiga’s tip into the center of his chest, efficiently inflicting a mortal wound. Hakago continued to stare at his executioner, fear and loathing in his gaze, until his body dissolved to dust and blew away in the wind. Inuyasha felt no sense of triumph at his victory, only grim satisfaction. A great enemy had been defeated, the last legacy of Naraku destroyed. And he…he was finally free. Transforming Tetsusaiga into its rustic form, he held the blade to his forehead for a moment, closing his eyes and reforging old bonds. Then he sheathed the sword and moved to care for the woman who had made all of this possible.

"Kikyou," he called gently, running the backs of his fingers lightly over her cheek. Her eyes fluttered open, as if the action required a great effort, and she favored him with a warm smile.

"Inuyasha."

The hanyou’s heart skipped a beat. She hadn’t looked at him like that since before her untimely death, since the last time they had been happy together. Granted, he hadn’t known what true happiness was back then, but each of them had been content with their respective existences for the first time, and looking forward to the future. Inuyasha couldn’t think of anything appropriate to say, so he went with the first idea which came to mind.

"Kikyou, you’re alive!" He immediately cursed himself for stating the obvious like a simpleton. He supposed his surprise was understandable, however, since he hadn’t known that she had survived Naraku’s assault at Mount Hakurei until today.

Kikyou’s smile turned wry. "Yes, Inuyasha. I am alive, in a manner of speaking."

The hanyou blinked, shocked by the utter lack of bitterness in her tone. To his knowledge, she had never spoken about the state of her existence without resentment. This was becoming very confusing very quickly. Muddled as his mind was, Inuyasha again spoke the first words—or _word_ —which popped into his head.

"How?"

Kikyou made a small sound of amusement. "Naraku was not able to kill me that day on Mount Hakurei. I survived, but I could not purge the miasma from my body. For several turns of the moon I lay dormant, being slowly devoured by Naraku’s poison. Until finally, I received aid from someone I least expected…"

"Kagome," Inuyasha muttered, instinctively knowing of whom Kikyou spoke. Logically, Kagome was probably the only person who could save her preincarnation from Naraku’s miasma, but he could also see it written on the older miko’s face. Again, the lack of bitterness in her expression and tone shocked him to the core.

"Indeed," Kikyou confirmed. "Kagome saved me that day, in more ways than one."

"Kikyou?"

She opened her mouth to respond, but a great shudder passed through her body, choking off her words. Two opaque spheres of brilliant blue emerged from her chest, floating off into the night. Inuyasha’s eyes widened in alarm as he realized what they were, and he frantically looked around for her shinidamachu.

"I sent them away," Kikyou stated calmly once she had recovered.

"Why, Kikyou?" Inuyasha demanded, dreading the answer.

"I am ready," she replied simply. Inuyasha began to retort, but the serenity of her expression stilled his tongue. "Do not mourn for me, Inuyasha. For the first time in my life, I am at peace. I have accomplished everything I meant to. I no longer wish to continue this cursed second existence. I am ready…to rest once more. I know I have no right to ask this of you, but…will you stay with me?"

"Of course, Kikyou," Inuyasha responded automatically. Part of him still wanted to argue with her, but he sensed that nothing he could say would change her mind. She was truly ready to die…to leave him again. It was all he could do to look away and blink back tears. If Kikyou noticed, she refrained from comment.

"Thank you, Inuyasha. Will you carry me? I would like to watch the sunset one last time."

Inuyasha immediately perked up at that, grateful to have a task to complete. He couldn’t save Kikyou, but at least he could do _something_ to make her more comfortable. If her final wish was within his power, he would move the heavens in order to grant it. He scrambled up a nearby tall tree in record time, finding a sturdy branch from which to look out over the canopy. He could take her up here if necessary, but he didn’t think that’s what she had in mind. Fortunately, over to the east the forest gave way into what looked like a small meadow. The position of the sun indicated that it would begin to set in about a half hour. He had plenty of time. Nonetheless, he vaulted down from the tree without delay and gingerly lifted Kikyou in his arms. Then he began striding purposefully toward the east, careful not to jostle his precious cargo.

"It was always amazing to watch you do that," Kikyou observed once she had settled in his arms. "Though there were times when I did not appreciate it," she admitted sadly. A heavy silence hung over them until she spoke again. "By now you are probably wondering what happened to the cold, heartless witch who formerly inhabited this body?"

Again Inuyasha moved to retort, and again his words were cut off by an escaping soul. It was just as well; he wasn’t sure what he might have said in denial of her assertion. Perhaps there was nothing he could have said. He didn’t want to lie to her, after all.

"It is all right," Kikyou soothed, seeming to understand his reticence. "I do not blame you for feeling that way. I have been…a terrible person since my resurrection.

"When I told you before that Kagome saved me, I was not referring solely to my physical body. When she purified Naraku’s miasma, she unintentionally left a piece of herself behind. A light, if you will. And slowly, this light began to heal wounds within me which delved far deeper than the flesh. For many days I wandered, fighting against Kagome’s light, unwilling to let go of my bitterness and hate. It is fortunate that I did not find you until I did, for only recently have I been able to see things the way they truly are. I have _accepted_ the way things truly are."

Something in the way she spoke the last sentence set Inuyasha on edge, a rather embarrassing possibility coming to mind. "Kikyou, did you… _see_ my memory?"

"I did."

Inuyasha snapped his head to the side and averted his gaze. He knew his cheeks were turning the color of his haori, but he chose not to dwell on his embarrassment. He thought he knew what Kikyou was trying to say, but couldn’t be sure. Her words, tone, and facial expression were sending mixed signals. And this was one subject where there could be no misunderstanding.

"Kikyou, do you…"

"Do I accept that you love Kagome, and that she loves you in a way that I never could?"

Inuyasha stopped in his tracks as the gravity of the moment hit him in a rush. He had come to terms with his feelings for Kagome prior to being tricked by Hakago. And he had determined that those feelings would remain constant whether or not Kikyou had survived her encounter with Naraku at Mount Hakurei. He didn’t know what he would have done if Kikyou had continued to demand that he join her in hell, but he would not have gone with her. Ever. His life and his soul belonged to Kagome. That said, he still cared for Kikyou and would do what he could to lessen her suffering.

And it was clear that she was suffering. Those words had been probably been the most difficult thing she’d ever had to say. She was not happy to have spoken them. But Inuyasha could sense no bitterness in her expression. She was remorseful, but he sensed that this emotion was directed at her own past failings. If only they had loved each other more fully, then they could have joined as man and wife and lived out their lives together fifty years ago. Inuyasha could not blame her for feeling that way. But Kikyou seemed to understand that it was not meant to be, and remained at peace with reality. She accepted the way things were, though she took no joy in it.

Not knowing what to say was becoming a theme for Inuyasha, but he managed to find a few simple, heartfelt words.

"Kikyou…thank you."

"There is no need to thank me, Inuyasha. I only wish for you to be happy, as you have always wished for me. I will be…content. A part of my soul will live on in Kagome. In that sense, I will always be with you."

Inuyasha smiled sadly, drawing comfort from this observation. He loved Kagome with all of his being, but there would always be a place in his heart for Kikyou. She seemed to understand, closing her eyes and leaning her head against his shoulder.

A contented silence settled over the pair as their short journey continued. Neither of them spoke until well after Inuyasha seated himself on a deserted hillside in the meadow, the perfect place to watch the setting sun. Souls continued to escape from Kikyou, each one sapping a little more of her strength. Eventually she could no longer lift her head, and lay limply in his embrace. But her eyes were open, and a small smile graced her features as she gazed into the western sky, those gorgeous shades of pink and blue which almost seemed to be welcoming her back to where she belonged. Finally she spoke, in a tone so thin and fragile that human ears would have trouble picking it up.

"Do you remember…the first time we watched a sunset together?"

"Like I could forget that," Inuyasha answered gently. It had been fairly soon after they first met, and he’d just started to see Kikyou as a potential companion rather than an enemy. "I remember thinking that I’d never noticed how beautiful it was before. It was the first time I actually looked forward to the sun rising the next morning."

"We were young and foolish back then…but we did love, in our own way."

Inuyasha could only nod, feeling his throat constrict under the barrage of emotions inspired by these memories.

"Inuyasha?"

"Y-yes?"

"May I ask one more favor?"

"Of course, Kikyou."

"Scatter my ashes here. Please, do not return them to my grave. Let me rest here, where I shared my final moments with you. By your side…was more of a home to me than the village ever was."

Two more souls escaped Kikyou then, and Inuyasha sensed that the end was near. He sobbed, finally losing the battle with his emotions.

"Inuyasha…I’ve never seen you make such a face and cry like that."

"Kikyou…"

"Do not mourn for me, Inuyasha," she told him again. "This time, I will go to my rest in the arms of my beloved. And that’s good enough."

She favored him with a smile which took his breath away. But her eyes…she was asking something of him, perhaps without even realizing it. She would not hold it against him if he declined to grant it, but in that moment he could not refuse her. As he leaned in to kiss her, he filled his heart with memories of happier times, when they had been each other’s one and only friend. Shared loneliness had grown into love, flawed but genuine, and he poured all of it into the kiss, which remained chaste but full of passion. When he pulled away, Kikyou favored him with one final, brilliant smile, then burst into a great torrent of light. He felt her soul embrace him, and he closed his eyes, savoring the feeling. Then it was gone, soaring up into the heavens. Within moments, all that remained was the darkening sky overhead. Kikyou was finally at peace.

Inuyasha seated himself once more on the hillside. Kikyou had told him not to mourn, but this was one request he would refuse. Tonight, he would honor her memory by holding a private vigil, and remembering their time together. He would grant her this one evening, because starting tomorrow morning, every day and night for the rest of his life would belong to Kagome.

Five hundred years in the future, the missing piece of a young woman’s soul settled into the body of its rightful owner, napping peacefully in her bed. She stirred briefly, but did not wake. Later she would experience a sensation of completeness, but would be unable to place the feeling. For it was not yet time for her to learn what had just transpired, to discover that the man she loved was finally hers again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – Well, people who hate Kikyou probably won’t like this chapter. Sorry, but I love how her death was handled in the manga. In my opinion it is one of Rumiko Takahashi’s finest scenes. I’m not ashamed to say that my eyes still get a little bleary when I read it. Hence I tried to emulate that scene in this story, while also creating something which I could call my own. I hope it was a satisfying conclusion to the Hakago arc!


	44. The Journey Home

Inuyasha woke with a start, flailing his arms in front of him as if to ward off some unseen enemy. His eyes darted to and fro, his ears swiveling in all directions. But the only sound which struck him as out of the ordinary in any way was the unusually rapid beating of his own heart.

Heaving a sigh, he slumped against the tree trunk at his back. He supposed he should feel grateful that he hadn’t fallen out of the tree, but it was difficult to muster a positive thought. It came as no surprise that the same guilt which plagued his waking moments had decided to visit him in his sleep. He could still hear their voices, see them reaching for him, their fingers clenching and grasping futilely. Some were faceless, while others he recognized from his intervals of consciousness while imprisoned within his own body. _Why?_ they asked. _Why did I have to die?_ He had no answer for them. One particular question haunted him the most—how many innocents had perished because of his failure?

It was true that he had never allowed Hakago to kill an innocent person with his own claws. That of course only held true if he did not regard human soldiers as ‘innocents’ and discounted his role, direct or indirect, in hundreds of military deaths. The assertion fell on tenuous ground either way. It was also true that he had been powerless to stop the bandits from murdering and raping as they pleased. Hakago had encouraged their savagery, enabled them to victimize vastly more people than they otherwise would have. Many innocents had lost their lives unnecessarily because he had fallen for the infant’s trick.

That was one way to look at it. The other was that he had no way of knowing how long the bandits would have continued their rampage without Hakago’s intervention, or how many people they would have victimized. While that was technically correct, the other viewpoint was easier to sink into, in a darkly seductive sort of way.

There were also exceptions, people who had actually benefitted from Hakago’s presence. Chief among them was the young woman who had run away from the village where the infant had first encountered the bandits. At the end of a lengthy pursuit, by which time the woman, barely more than a girl, lay weeping in a puddle of her own urine, Hakago had decided to let her go rather than dragging her back to the bandits. She had suffered, but it was better than the treatment she would likely have received in the smoking ruins of the village which used to be her home. And since Hakago had not caused the bandits to attack that particular village, it served as some comfort to know that at least one person was better off because the infant had come into her life. Since she was perhaps the only person that logic applied to, however, it did little to soothe Inuyasha’s guilt.

He fished the Shikon no Tama from his robes and held it up to the light, grimacing at its lack of luster. It still maintained the pink hue it had assumed since being purified by Kikyou’s reiki during the final titanic clash of wills against Hakago, but over time it had begun to darken. He found that he could keep the corruption at bay by turning his mind toward more pleasant pursuits, but when depressing thoughts set in like this the purity of the jewel inevitably declined.

Deciding he’d had enough of his miserable musings, Inuyasha vaulted down from the tree. His legs protested the landing, and he passed several minutes stretching his sore muscles. Before resting last night, he’d spent most of the last thirty-six hours sprinting at top speed, or as near as he could muster. At times it had been impossible to tell whether he was running toward his future or away from his past, all those ill-fated souls who called out to him with every whisper of wind, reached for him from every shadow. He occasionally wondered how he was going to hold onto his sanity. This was different from slaughtering Gatenmaru’s band of ruffians. He hated killing humans, but those bastards had deserved to die. Most of the men, women and children who had fallen victim to Hakago or his bandits, on the other hand, were innocent. And then, as before, his weakness had resulted in human suffering and death.

His throat reverberating with a half-growl, half-whimper, Inuyasha dug his foot into the ground and took off at a dead sprint. Running would help. He didn’t know why, but physical exertion made the guilt easier to deal with. Without the sensory stimulus of activity or company, his mind tended to turn down a dark path. He needed to think happier thoughts, pull himself away from that destructive course. How horrible would it be to accidentally corrupt the Shikon no Tama and lose his mind after all he and Kagome had been through?

Kagome…she was the one reason he stood a chance of making it home with his sanity intact. Or more correctly, she was one of two reasons, and carried the other in her womb. He valued her opinion above all others, and if she told him to forgive himself, then he would try. He would devote his life to protecting his family, friends and neighbors, go on exorcisms with Miroku to help other settlements, and assist the people of Kaede’s village with their daily lives. Bottom line: there was a lot of good he could do in the world. And if by the end of his days the sum total did not make up for the evil he had caused, then he would face the consequences.

Kagome would tell him to forgive himself…she had to. He would tell her his story, and if she still accepted him, then he would confess his true feelings, say the words he should have spoken all those moons ago when she first cupped his cheek and told him that she loved him. A selfish part of him hoped her memory of that night never returned. He’d been such a terrible lover—clumsy, woefully inexperienced, and even worse, too drunk to hold himself back as much as he should have to lessen her discomfort. He would look forward to the time when Kagome granted him the opportunity to make it up to her. She would see it as simply making love for the first time while both of them were sober, but it would be more than that for him. Only by loving her as she deserved in all senses of the word could he prove to himself and everyone else that he could be a good mate and husband. It was not the only thing he had to prove; fatherhood loomed up before him, after all, and he was even more inexperienced at that than he was at lovemaking.

Of course, he might already be a father; he wasn’t sure how much time had passed during his incarceration. Kagome could have given birth already, which was yet another reason for his haste. He wanted to be there supporting her when she brought their child into the world. He wanted to hold the newborn babe in his arms and marvel at his son or daughter. And right from the beginning, he wanted his offspring to know his scent, and recognize that he loved it more than life itself. If he didn’t make it in time, he would of course adjust and move on. But it would hurt, and he didn’t need anything else causing him pain right now.

Despite his overall melancholy, Inuyasha was fairly optimistic that he would be there for the birth. Kikyou said that she had wandered for ‘many days’ after Kagome rescued her from Naraku’s miasma. Assuming that ‘many days’ meant between one to three months—which was probably true, or Kikyou might have said ‘many _months_ ’—then the timeline worked out in his favor. Not even Kagome was stubborn enough to go traipsing around feudal japan when she was that close to giving birth. Inuyasha was still debating whether to chew out Miroku, Sango, and Shippou for letting her go at all, after they had promised him that they wouldn’t. But he knew how strong-willed Kagome could be, and the reality was that if she had complied with his wishes and stayed in the modern era, then he would not be here right now making his way back to her. Kikyou would have either failed to save him or would have dragged him to hell after doing so. Therefore, it would be pretty hypocritical of him to yell at his friends for giving in and going with her. As long as she and the baby were safe, he would probably let them off with a mild scolding.

As long as Kagome and the baby were safe, everything would be all right. No irreparable damage had been done to any of the people he truly cared about, either emotional or physical. Bonds of friendship could be reforged, and new, far deeper bonds could be created from scratch if need be. But that would not be necessary, as long as Kagome still loved him. In this his faith was almost absolute. Her heart was the purest thing in existence, and it would not forget him so easily.

Inuyasha ran for several hours, reflecting upon what waited for him back home, both in the immediate and long-term future. And for the first time in two days, he was able to keep the negative thoughts completely at baby. He did not stop until the mid-afternoon sun was at its apex. The scent of fresh water reminded him of how thirsty he was, and he detoured through the forest running along the roadway to find a small stream. After satisfying his thirst and shrugging off his robes to splash some cool water on his upper body, he determined to catch himself a meal. His empty stomach protested at being fed only water, roiling at the thought of real sustenance. Fortunately this area was full of game, and in short order he had a fire going, with rabbit meat roasting over it on sticks. It reminded him of the old days, before he met Kikyou over fifty years ago. Hopefully this was one of the last times he would have to camp by himself. He was no longer accustomed to being alone, having spent many evenings in the company of friends. The solitude was unsettling to say the least.

After devouring his meal, Inuyasha returned to the roadway and resumed his journey. He enjoyed running through forests more, but he could move faster on roads for the simple reason that he didn’t have to maneuver around any trees. And speed was more important than pleasure right now. He would continue until well after dusk, then stop and rest for a few hours. He didn’t need a full night’s sleep, but a short break to regain his energy would make his daytime exertions more productive, as well as ensuring that he was in decent shape for a fight. So far he’d been traveling too quickly for any nearby youkai to react to the presence of the Shikon no Tama. But when he’d stopped last night, he’d been attacked by two lower youkai in rapid succession. Only after carefully scouting the area had he allowed himself to sink deeply enough into slumber to generate dreams, and even then his senses were attuned to his surroundings. That was one aspect of ‘the old days’ that he’d probably never outgrow, especially with a wife and child to protect.

Wife. _You’re getting ahead of yourself again…_ He hadn’t even asked Kagome to marry him, hadn’t even _seen_ her in months, but ever since being liberated from Hakago he’d pictured himself as her husband. He literally couldn’t help getting ahead of himself. And honestly, anything which helped him maintain a positive state of mind so he could return to her was welcome.

Inuyasha knew which direction he was heading and had a general idea of where he was on the rough map of central Honshu in his head, drawn over years of wandering the countryside. But it wasn’t until he reached a familiar five-way intersection just before sunset that he was able to pinpoint his exact location. He had been here before, and recently at that. Down the second road to the left was the path which would eventually take him home. And a short distance down the road to his immediate left…

For several minutes Inuyasha stood in the middle of the intersection, debating with himself. A traveling salesman gave him an odd look as he passed but otherwise left him alone. Fortunately this part of the country was far removed from the lands afflicted by the mysterious red-clad hanyou and his bandits, so it was unlikely that anyone would react to him with more fear and distrust than usual. Two individuals here had, however, been directly affected by his failure to see through Hakago’s trick on that fateful day. The infant had been exploring his new body’s limits, and had journeyed here in search of some unsuspecting and unwilling test subjects. Inuyasha had fought hard to keep them alive that day, and back then he’d still been able to exert significant control over his body, so his efforts had met with success. But his heart clenched at the memory of the little girl’s wide, frightened eyes, the scent of her tears as the cried in her mother’s lap.

While scaring Shiori and her mother, Shizu, was probably the least of his sins, he still wanted to make it right if he could. But would they listen to him, or would his appearance only make things worse? Hence his dilemma. Eventually he decided to approach. If there was even a chance that he could soothe their fears and assure them that he wasn’t going to come back and slaughter them as promised, then he owed it to them to try. And if it became clear that talking to them was a futile endeavor, he would run away and never return. He owed them that consideration as well.

Locating the hut the little hanyou shared with her mother was no challenge; it was the only one set apart from the village proper. They were perhaps closer to the rebuilt village than they had been before, but not by much. It saddened Inuyasha to see the obvious disconnect. _They’re still outcasts, even though Shiori’s courage drove away the bat-youkai and brought peace to the village._ It was disappointing, but not surprising; he’d always known that some hard times lay ahead for Shiori and her mom. He was quite familiar with the cruelty of humans, after all. _Some humans_ , he corrected in his head. He had eventually found some happy exceptions to the rule, and hopefully Shiori and Shizu would as well someday. But as to the here and now, this pending reunion was not going to be pleasant. Mother and daughter could be heard eating a quiet meal inside the hut. Their peace was about to be shattered. He would do his best to make his intentions clear as quickly as possible, but there was only so much he could do in that regard. Then it would be up to them, and whether they were willing to listen. After a deep breath to calm his nerves, Inuyasha pushed aside the flap over the door and stepped inside.

Shizu noticed him immediately, from her position facing the doorway. She gasped, but her shock in no way prevented her from taking action, as she simultaneously snatched up a knife with her right hand and pulled Shiori against her side with her left.

"Go away!" she snarled, like a cornered tigress protecting her cub. "I-If you come any closer, I’ll kill you!" Despite her fierce words, the knife shook in her hand and her teeth ground together audibly. It was clear that she doubted her ability to protect the only person she loved in this world from the monster before her, but would die trying.

"I’m not going to hurt you," Inuyasha said quietly, raising his hands in a placating gesture. He slowly lowered himself into a crouch to appear less threatening, hoping they could read his body language and the sincerity in his expression.

"Go away, you bastard," Shizu demanded. "Go away!"

Inuyasha glanced from mother to daughter and back again. Instead of any hint that they were receptive to his words, he found their expressions dominated only by fear and fury. Shizu was blinded by her protective instinct, and Shiori…she was looking at him the same way she’d looked at Hakago. Heaving a sigh, Inuyasha rose to his feet and turned to leave. He would find no atonement here.

"Wait!" a high-pitched voice called.

"Shiori!"

Inuyasha glanced over his shoulder to find that the little hanyou had broken away from her mother and was warily making her way over to him. Shizu could be seen kneeling in the background, her face contorted with abject terror. With faint hope blossoming in his chest, Inuyasha crouched down once more, bringing his face to Shiori’s level. She stopped about a meter in front of him, studying him carefully. Inuyasha met her gaze unflinchingly, praying that she would see what he was, and what he was not. Finally she raised her hand. Inuyasha looked down at the tiny appendage, so small and fragile, and almost reverentially raised his own hand to match. He let Shiori initiate the contact, afraid to even breathe on her, let alone touch her. He could barely breathe at all, as his heartbeat thundered in his chest and he waited for her to say something. Perhaps he imagined the sensation of her youki pressing experimentally against his own. But he knew he did not imagine the wondrous thing she did next—she smiled.

  
"It’s okay, Kaa-chan," she declared, turning back to her mother. "Inuyasha-sama is himself again."

"Shiori, please…"

Seeing how frightened her mother was, the little hanyou finally moved away from him and returned to her mother’s waiting arms. As Shizu embraced her daughter, she painted Inuyasha with a harsh glare. But this time, he knew that he would not be forced to leave, at least not before being granted an opportunity to explain himself. Shiori’s acceptance and the fact that he hadn’t killed her had earned him that much at least. Again with the idea of appearing as non-threatening as possible, Inuyasha seated himself against the doorframe, removing Tetsusaiga from his obi and setting it on the floor beside him. Shizu watched his every move like a hawk, while Shiori continued to smile at him with the beautiful innocence of a child who believes with all of her heart that the person before her is a friend. A wave of emotion caused Inuyasha to bite his lip and blink his eyes several times against a sudden persistent itching. To see her looking at him like that meant a lot, more than it logically should. Never again would he give her a reason to think ill of him.

"The last time I was here, I was possessed by an evil youkai," he began, deciding to get right to the point. "I was trapped inside my own body, but I still had enough power to stop him from hurting you. Now I’m free and the evil youkai is dead. I came here to apologize and ask for your forgiveness."

"See, Kaa-chan!" Shiori exclaimed. "I knew Inuyasha-sama wasn’t himself that day!"

Shizu made no reply. She continued to eye him warily, though her gaze did soften noticeably. She was not ready to trust him completely, and probably would not be for some time. But each piece of evidence told her that he meant no harm—his actions, her own two eyes, and her daughter’s judgment among them. Everything except her memory of the day when he had threatened to slaughter them. It would take more than a single evening to move beyond such a powerful memory, which Inuyasha understood. He was just thrilled that they were willing to listen to him at all, as well as humbled by Shiori’s faith. He had saved her once, but today, he could honestly say that she had saved him.

"How were you possessed by this evil youkai?" Shizu finally asked, evidently wishing for more details. Inuyasha was happy to oblige, but knew it would be a long tale. To truly earn their trust, he would have to start from the beginning. He was already formulating an idea, for which some level of trust was an absolute must. When he told Shizu it would take a while, she responded by throwing a couple more pieces of wood onto the fire, scooting back against the wall and pulling Shiori into her lap. She placed the knife on the floor by her side, still within easy reach, and gazed at him expectantly.

Inuyasha started, as promised, at the beginning. The first several dozen years of his life—he had no idea how long it actually was—could be summed up in a few short sentences. His father was a daiyoukai, and had died soon after his birth. He grew up with his mother until she too died, and he was banished to the wilds, where he grew up alone. After many years he met the miko, Kikyou, guardian of the Shikon no Tama, a legendary jewel of power. Together he and Kikyou agreed to purify the jewel so both of them could live normal lives. He told the child-friendly version devoid of any romantic insinuations, but he was pretty sure that at least Shizu could read between the lines. Next came a general description of the tragedy—a youkai named Naraku mortally wounded Kikyou and tricked her into pinning him to a tree with a sacred arrow.

For fifty years he slept, until he was awakened by Kagome, who he later discovered was Kikyou’s reincarnation. From there he delivered a general account of their journey to restore the Shikon no Tama and vanquish Naraku, including how Miroku, Sango, and Shippou had come to join them. At some point during the tale, Shiori fell asleep, which was probably for the best. When he got to the part about Kagome becoming pregnant with his child, he didn’t have to worry about tailoring his words for the little girl’s ears. Shizu’s eyes widened in surprise, but she gave no sign of reproach. She was probably the last person on Earth who would criticize someone for falling in love with a youkai and bearing his child, after all. And Inuyasha was pretty sure that she understood what he wasn’t saying about his relationship with Kagome.

It became more obvious over the next portion of the story, which took longer because he had trouble getting out his words in some parts. A couple times he literally choked on his shame. But Shizu continued to listen attentively, and not judgmentally, as he related how his failures had caused Kagome to lose herself to Hakago, the great struggle to liberate her and slay Naraku, and finally how Hakago had tricked him and taken control of his body. He did not elaborate on how the infant had managed to deceive him, and was grateful that Shizu did not press him for details. She seemed fairly overwhelmed by the time he finished the tale, and had probably never expected him to provide so much information about his life. But there was a reason for it, which he would get to soon. In the meantime, he would let his audience process the overflow of information in silence for as long as she needed. Shizu only took a minute or two.

"I think you’re telling the truth, but it just seems so fantastic," she observed, her tone now almost conversational. Overall, she seemed infinitely more relaxed than before, which Inuyasha was glad to see. "Your life is like a fairy tale. A tragic one, at times, especially about Kikyou. How she died…you must feel pretty conflicted. It was touching, but sad."

Inuyasha nodded. "I wish…I could have done more for her. But I’m glad she was at peace."

"It sounds like you did everything you could," Shizu said, which was nice to hear despite the melancholy inspired by Kikyou’s memory.

"Thanks."

She shook her head. "No, I really mean it. But…there’s one thing I don’t get. You’ve been rushing home to see Kagome, and you’re not sure if she’s given birth yet but you’re really hoping to make it in time, and you still stopped here and wasted precious time just to see us?"

Inuyasha, who had been nodding through the course of the question, found himself grimacing at the last part. When one put it that way, it did seem rather foolish. But also noble, which was clearly how Shizu felt about it.

"I remembered what I—that bastard said to you, and I wanted to make sure you knew that I wasn’t going to come back and hurt you. It was…important to me, for you to know that."

"Well, I appreciate it. Since that day…it hasn’t always been easy for Shiori and me to sleep. I lie awake at night, jumping at every sound, and she sometimes has nightmares. She always believed that there was something wrong with you that day, but it was the fear that you wouldn’t be yourself when you came back that made it hard for her. I haven’t seen her sleep this soundly in months," Shizu observed with a tender smile, brushing a lock of hair away from her daughter’s face.

"I thought about leaving the village, but out there is even more dangerous for us. At least here the people tolerate us, and there still aren’t any youkai around because this used to be the heart of bat territory. So when I say that I appreciate that you took the time to assure us that you’re back to normal, I really do mean it. Thank you, Inuyasha."

Inuyasha, whose ears had wilted like dying plants as he learned of the suffering he’d caused, felt his heart lighten somewhat by Shizu’s display of gratitude. He couldn’t give them back the sleepless nights or take away the nightmares, but he had at least ensured that they would experience no restlessness because of him in the future. If he missed the birth as a result of this detour, he would not regret it, nor would Kagome hold it against him. For once, he had accomplished exactly what he meant to. Well, there was still one unfulfilled goal, which he turned to next.

"Shizu…you said that the villagers ‘tolerate’ you and Shiori. How are they treating you?"

She shrugged. "Better than before."

"But you’re still living out here by yourself."

This time Shizu shot him a questioning look, and her reply held elements of defensiveness. "It’s better than it was. The villagers don’t pick on us much anymore. Like I said, they tolerate us."

"But they don’t accept you," Inuyasha retorted. "I noticed earlier that you didn’t call for help. Was it because you knew nobody would come?"

"Well, they wouldn’t have been able to do anything even if they did come, would they?" she snapped. Shiori stirred and Shizu took a moment to soothe the girl back to slumber. When she raised her eyes once more, she appeared equally tired and frustrated. "Inuyasha, where are you going with this?"

"I’m going home…and I’m hoping you’ll think about coming with me."

Shizu gasped. For several long moments she studied him, her mouth hanging slightly open. This is where telling his story ‘from the beginning’ came into play. The first time they met, Shiori and Shizu had seen only the best part of him—the brave, heroic hanyou who would selflessly rescue a little girl simply because he wanted to. The next time, he’d been a bloodthirsty monster, literally the stuff of nightmares. The story of his past revealed him for what he truly was—a flawed man who consistently screwed up his personal relationships, but who was honorable and tried to be a good person. This was a man she might be willing to entrust her daughter’s safety to, rather than the unrealistic superhero. For now she _knew_ him, faults and all. And if she did not consider that man worthy of such trust, then she should refuse his offer. Finally Shizu swallowed and spoke.

"Inuyasha…are you offering to take Shiori and me to your village?"

Inuyasha nodded sharply. "Look, I can’t promise you a hanyou paradise. I’m sure some of the villagers harbor prejudice toward youkai. But there are enough who don’t to make a real difference. You’d have it better than you do here. You’d actually be able to live _in_ the village. Shiori would be able to play with kids her own age. Miroku and Sango are gonna settle down and start a family there. Kagome and I are gonna do the same. There won’t be any place in the world better for a hanyou to grow up, you have my word on that," he stated resolutely. "Don’t decide now. Just think about it. I’ll return in a few moons, and if you decide to come, then I’ll take you there myself."

Again he gave Shizu some time to process his offer. He couldn’t tell exactly what she was thinking, but it was obvious that she found the idea of raising Shiori in a place more accepting of her kind very appealing. Any mother would want the same for her child. The issues were probably trust, and the natural fear of the unknown. It was one reason why he had told her just to think about it for now, with the more selfish desire to get back to Kagome as soon as possible being the other.

Eventually Shizu did agree to consider his offer, and thanked him for it. If Inuyasha was a betting man, he would put money on her eventual acceptance. He would return in a few moons as promised and hear the answer then. And if they chose to remain here, then he would wish them the best, and probably check on them periodically over the years. He’d grown pretty fond of Shiori, and Shizu wasn’t so bad herself, once you got past her protective instinct.

Inuyasha departed shortly thereafter in decent spirits, determined to run nearly non-stop until dusk the following evening. He’d had his rest, and could now make up for lost time. With any luck, a very pregnant Kagome would be waiting for him on the other side of the bone eater’s well. And if he was too late, then he would take solace in the fact that he had improved the lives of two of Hakago’s victims. He hoped they would allow him to continue to do so in the future.

* * *

Inuyasha’s heart leapt in his chest the instant the bone eater’s well came into view. It had been a long journey to get here, and he didn’t intend to waste another moment. Fortunately, his excitement did not overpower his innate sense of his surroundings, and he noticed that something was slightly off about the wooden structure before attempting to leap into it. That would have been very painful. For plastered across either side of the frame were small pieces of paper which did not belong there. Closer inspection revealed them to be protective sutras, and an experimental touch sparked an energetic and stinging reaction. It was likely that no one possessing youkai blood would be able to pass.

Inuyasha growled in annoyance. He was glad that his friends had taken steps to protect Kagome, in case Hakago decided to go after her in the modern era. But now he had to delay his reunion with her to ask Miroku to remove the sutras. Irritating as that was, he supposed it was a necessary hindrance. As long as the monk didn’t make this more difficult than it needed to be, then no one would have to suffer an anxious hanyou’s wrath.

He found Miroku and Sango eating dinner in a new hut not far from Kaede’s. _Hmph, those two certainly wasted no time, did they?_ Not that he could blame them. Shippou and Kirara were with them, but what really drew his attention was Sango’s scent. _Heh, they_ really _wasted no time._ He would congratulate them later, however; tonight he had somewhere else to be. Knowing it was only a matter of time before someone detected his scent or his aura, Inuyasha cleared his throat loudly. As expected, the noise sent all four occupants scrambling out of the hut, armed and ready for combat.

"It’s me, you idiots," he declared, folding his arms over his chest. He couldn’t suppress a grin; it truly was nice to see them again. It was clear, however, that while his friends wanted to believe him, they were not yet ready to let down their guard.

"If that is true," Miroku responded seriously, "then you will not mind submitting to an inspection."

"What kind of inspection?" Inuyasha demanded, somewhat nervously. In reply, Miroku drew a sutra from his robes, one which the hanyou recognized. He groaned. "Not that fuckin’ thing!"

"Relax, Inuyasha. If it is truly you, then you will only have to wear this for a few moments."

Grumbling under his breath, the hanyou seated himself on the ground. Bad enough he had to be restrained; at least this way he wouldn’t fall face-first into the dirt. "Go ahead," he snapped, repeating in his head the calming mantra that this was all for Kagome. His muscles seized uncomfortably as the sutra struck his forehead, and just like that, he found himself unable to move any part of his body more than a centimeter or two. He could speak in this position, but only with some difficulty.

Miroku got right down to business, kneeling before him and placing his hands on Inuyasha’s shoulders. The hanyou felt the monk’s spiritual aura digging into his own, the motivation exploratory rather than hostile. Inuyasha did his best to relax and keep his youki from lashing out against the foreign presence. Fortunately Miroku finished his examination quickly as promised, sitting back on his haunches and adopting a relieved smile.

"Welcome back, my friend," he declared, causing Sango and Shippou to heave sighs of relief. "Might I ask how you freed yourself from Hakago?"

"I’ll tell you later. Take this damn sutra off already."

Sango snorted. "That’s our Inuyasha, all right. Seems like he’s definitely back to normal."

"Maybe we should leave him like that for a while," Shippou suggested, sounding as though he was only half joking.

Miroku seemed to ponder the idea carefully. "You know, that might not be such a terrible idea. Perhaps we _should_ leave the sutra on."

Inuyasha growled. "Not unless you want your kid to grow up without a father!"

Instantly the jovial atmosphere of the gathering shifted, as both adults stared at him in shock. Shippou smacked himself in the forehead, and muttered in a voice too quiet for human ears to pick up. "So much for ‘finding the right time.’ Baka."

All of this told Inuyasha that he might have revealed something which the two prospective parents were not aware of yet, something which he perhaps should have revealed, as Shippou suggested, at a more opportune moment. _Oh, well, too damn bad! They shouldn’t have been teasing me!_ Even in his own head that sounded immature.

"Inuyasha, am I…"

Oh, déjà vu was a cruel mistress. Those were the exact same words which Kagome had used to ask if she was with child, though hopefully the reactions of the two women would be decidedly different. Feeling as though he was performing a private joke with himself, Inuyasha gave the same response he’d given back then.

"Pregnant?"

Sango turned to Miroku, and for a brief moment the two of them stared at each other with the same dazed expression. Then at once both of their faces lit up, and suddenly they were embracing, laughing together as Miroku swung Sango around in a circle. Finally he set the taijiya on her feet only to kiss her passionately, leaving hanyou and kitsune understandably stunned. Especially the former, who had never seen them behave like this before. In fact, Inuyasha received the distinct impression that he’d been completely forgotten about.

"Oi! Will somebody take this fucking sutra off?!"

* * *

Inuyasha sighed, staring into the darkness at the bottom of the well. He stood on the lip of the structure, which was finally devoid of any protective sutras. Miroku had removed the evil little slips of paper, after a conversation which Inuyasha had found somewhat productive despite his general grumpiness. He’d learned that Kagome was indeed still pregnant, or at least she had been yesterday. Sango thought she was a little more than eight months along, so he’d arrived with time to spare.

The subject of Kagome’s pregnancy had driven Inuyasha to demand to know why the others had allowed her to go out looking for him. Their justification did not surprise him, since it stemmed from Kagome’s stubbornness. They apologized and begged his forgiveness for breaking their promise, which made Inuyasha feel guilty enough to confess the truth behind his liberation from Hakago. His friends were still apologetic even after learning that Kagome’s intervention had set into motion events which directly led to his salvation, but as far as Inuyasha was concerned it was all water under the bridge. They had gone with Kagome to keep her safe and helped persuade her to give the baby priority to at least some extent. In doing so, they had done all that he could reasonably ask of them.

In a strange sort of way, however, that conversation was responsible for his current predicament. Absent the immediate thrill of bursting through the tree line and seeing the well again for the first time in months, he found that he lacked the courage to leap into the time portal. Now instead of blindly following his heart, he stood frozen in place with his mind running rampant on him. Would Kagome really be glad to see him after all this time? What would she say to him? More importantly, what would he say to her? _Baka! You just have to be honest about your feelings for once!_ That was exactly what he was worried about.

"This is stupid," he said aloud. Was he really pussyfooting around with his emotions again? This shit had to stop! _You are stronger than this._

He was…he had to be. For Kagome’s sake, and for the sake of his child. He tilted his head back and gazed up into the sky, at the stars which had just begun to emerge from their curtain of blackness. Then, without looking down, he stepped into the void.


	45. If You'll Have Me

Inuyasha’s hand subconsciously drifted up to his chest, as if to prevent his wildly beating heart from leaping out of his body. He was practically hyperventilating, with sweat beading on his brow. His normally comfortable fire-rat robes felt unbearably hot, and he was sorely tempted to loosen or even remove them altogether. But that would be a form of retreat, and would not help him gather the courage to move forward. Sighing, he gazed up at the roof of the well house, illuminated by the waning daylight shining in through the cracks in the doorway.

To be in such sorry shape, when he hadn’t even pulled himself out of the manmade hole in the ground? It was pretty embarrassing, and he was glad that no one was here to bear witness. The little pep talk he’d given himself in the feudal era had carried him through to Kagome’s time, but all of his momentum was now completely dissipated. How long had he been down here? A few minutes? An hour? Part of him felt as though his whole life had been building up to this moment. He hated being weak. For years he’d viewed revealing any hint of weakness as tantamount to flirting with death. But in order to win the future he so desired, he needed to place his life in the hands of another, to leave himself more vulnerable than he’d ever been. He had to give Kagome his heart, as well as the power to crush it.

He snorted and shook his head. _Kagome already has that power, whether you give it to her or not._ That thought oddly made him feel a little better. He was already vulnerable. He had already let her into his heart, and would never be able to evict her even if he wanted to. Now he just needed to fully open himself, to complete the process which Kagome had started over a year ago, on the day they first met. When viewed in that light, his task seemed less daunting. He didn’t honestly believe she would reject him. Well, not really, aside from the persistent doubts which always lurked in the darkest corner of his mind. That was not the reason he hesitated. No, the greatest force which held him back was guilt. For he would have to explain to Kagome why he had lost to Hakago, why he’d let his heart become corrupted when there was no good reason for it to _be_ corrupted. He’d let darkness take him away from her for months, a darkness which never should have existed. How much had she suffered? How much grief had his foolishness caused?

He shook his head again, harder this time. If his thoughts turned down that path, he might never leave this well house. Kagome was a forgiving person. If he was truthful and repentant, she would forgive him. Perhaps not all at once, but eventually. And if all went well, he would have a lifetime to make amends.

But that was a worry for another day. He needed to move forward, to take one step at a time, the first ‘step’ being to leap out of this cursed hole in the ground. He did so, then strode over to the door and placed his ear against it. Upon hearing no sign of anyone on the shrine grounds, he cracked open the door and peeked his head out. He sighed in relief on finding the grounds deserted. The last thing he needed was Kagome’s kid brother or her stuffy old grandfather discovering him first; he might just lose all of his nerve and run back to the feudal era if that happened. The trick would be getting Kagome’s attention without alerting her relatives to his presence. But before that, another ‘step’ loomed—namely, emerging from the well house.

It felt like leaving a nice, cozy home to go trek through a blizzard, but he managed. And with each tentative step toward the Higurashi household, his heartbeat kicked up a notch. Finally he realized that he was behaving like a nervous deer, and moved forward with more confidence. It was time to man up, which is difficult to do when one is performing his best imitation of a scared little boy. Most of Inuyasha’s newfound confidence was artificial, but it got the job done. Before he knew it, he found himself standing in the shadow of the house, barely ten paces from the front door.

Now, here is where he ran into his dilemma. How could he get Kagome’s attention without alerting her family? More than likely, they would follow her out the door to see what the fuss was about. But he wanted to see _her_ first, not one of her relatives. Contacting her directly would probably be the easiest way to assure this, but her window was closed and her shades were drawn. Since she hadn’t noticed his aura yet, he deduced that she was probably asleep. And knocking on or throwing pebbles at the window just seemed like a really lame way to greet the woman he loved for the first time in several months.

His aura…that might be the way to go. Even in her sleep, she would surely sense his aura if he made it powerful enough. And no one else in the family would, least of all her fake priest of a grandfather. Since he didn’t have any better ideas, Inuyasha decided to try that approach. Sure enough, the flaring of his youki bore immediate results. He thought he heard Kagome gasp from inside her bedroom, though that might have been his imagination. He knew he did not imagine the sound of feet moving quickly but carefully down the stairs, or her voice telling her family members to stay inside the house. His brow furrowed at the fear in her tone, and he was initially unable to comprehend the reason behind it. Before he had much time to think about it, however, the front door slid open and out stepped the woman whom he intended to make his wife. At her sudden appearance, Inuyasha’s frazzled mind slipped helplessly into stupor.

Kagome was nothing short of radiant. She wore a knee-length maternity dress which covered her shoulders but bore no sleeves. The vibrant color scheme reminded one of a windy spring afternoon, with flowers of every variety dancing in the breeze. The material was loose enough to be comfortable, but form-fitting enough to reveal her figure. Her breasts seemed larger than Inuyasha remembered, set above the beautiful swell of her belly. By the look of things, his son or daughter would be born in a matter of weeks. Obviously, the dress doubled as sleepwear, at least for a late afternoon nap. Kagome’s face was slightly pale from her slumber, her hair disheveled in the most delightful way. A cool wind blew up, tossing the already tousled strands behind her and framing her beautiful face. If he tried for the rest of his days, Inuyasha would never be able to conjure up words capable of doing her justice. She was a goddess, a mother and a warrior all wrapped into perfection. And when she spoke, both sides of that divine coin were on display.

"Who are you?" she demanded.

Her voice should have been as sweet as the melody of water flowing down a tranquil forest stream. Instead, her words crashed against his skull like a wave pummeling against rock. As confused as he was right now, Inuyasha’s head might as well have been made of stone. He had not anticipated her hostility, nor the bow clutched firmly in her left hand or the arrow in her right. The bowstring was drawn taunt, the projectile aimed straight for his heart. Her jaws were clenched, her lips drawn in a thin line. Her eyes blazed with passion, an unquenchable fury he had only seen directed at those who sought to harm the people she loved. But there was softness in her dark orbs as well, a cautious hope, beaten down but never banished. It was this which Inuyasha focused on as he scrambled to figure out why Kagome was looking at him with such hostility.

Mrs. Higurashi’s frightened gasp provided the clue he needed. She and the rest of the family had followed Kagome out of the house as anticipated, each of them looking at him as though they weren’t sure whether they knew him or not. That analogy, he realized, was probably close to the truth. Obviously he had not thought this through very well. _Shit! They think I’m still possessed by Hakago!_ Hadn’t he just been through this with Miroku and the others? So logically Kagome and her family would fear the same thing, would they not? Yet somehow, he’d been so focused on what Kagome would say to him and vice versa, that he neglected to consider that she wouldn’t even know it _was_ him! Evidently he’d left his intelligence five hundred years in the past. This reunion was off to a _fabulous_ start.

"I’ll ask once more," Kagome stated, drawing the bowstring back even further. "Who are you?"

"I-It’s me, Kagome!" Inuyasha tried, raising his hands. She narrowed her eyes, ostensibly so they could maintain their hard edge. But when she spoke, her voice could not quite sustain the same level of fierceness. She wanted to believe him so badly, but the lives of her family and her child were at stake.

"Are you willing to prove it?"

Inuyasha nodded automatically. He doubted there was anything in this world which he would not do to convince Kagome that he was himself again. She nodded.

"Osuwari!"

Inuyasha tensed for the imminent impact of his face against the hard pavement, but the subjugation spell never activated. The rosary remained around his neck, but it felt like nothing more than a simple necklace. _Hakago…he probably used the Shikon no Tama to break the rosary’s hold over me._ The less mature side of him started dancing a little jig inside of his head, but now he had another problem. Namely, how was Kagome supposed to restrain him now? It wasn’t surprising that the infant had moved to limit her ability to control him, though Inuyasha did wonder why he had left the necklace in place. Probably for an insidious purpose, the hanyou reflected, involving an eventual confrontation with Kagome and the miko seeing the rosary in place and letting her guard down. He was secretly proud of her for doing nothing of the sort; her readiness to fire the arrow had never wavered, even as she shouted the command. And fortunately, Kagome had prepared for this possibility.

"Mama, please reach into my pocket and hand me the slip of paper there."

Inuyasha knew what was next, and he sent a mental note of gratitude to Miroku. He didn’t know what other options existed for verifying his identity, but the use of a restraining sutra would be quick and relatively painless. Somewhat humiliating, but he would bear it without complaint. He didn’t dare move a muscle until Kagome told him to sit on the ground, which he did slowly and deliberately, all the while having flashbacks to his recent conversation with Shiori and Shizu. Absent Kagome’s spiritual energy, the two situations would be almost identical.

Kagome released her grip on the arrow, snatched the sutra from her mother’s hand, charged it with reiki and threw it all in one smooth motion, before immediately drawing the arrow again. The flurry of movement left barely a second of vulnerability, which would have been difficult to exploit even if Inuyasha had intended to do so. Instead he simply observed her, with equal parts awe and pride. The effectiveness of the sutra was just as impressive; what Kagome lacked in skill compared to Miroku, she made up for in raw power. Inuyasha considered himself fortunate that his involuntary muscle movements still functioned—heartbeat and breathing chief among them. The restraining seal was probably more effective than it needed to be; a more experienced miko might use less reiki to conserve energy and make the seal more durable. But it was perfect for Kagome’s purposes, and Inuyasha was glad to see her taking no chances, even if the result was more pain on his part.

She approached him warily, refusing to make eye contact for more than a split-second. Perhaps she was not completely confident in her ability to gauge his truthfulness, and did not wish to make her task more emotionally challenging than it already was. This impression was confirmed by the inspection she performed with her reiki, which probed deeper and continued longer than Miroku’s had. It was as though some deep-seated insecurity prevented her from believing what each one of her body’s senses were telling her. What turned the tide for her was their child’s aura, reaching out to its father for the first time. Inuyasha gasped. _My son…that’s my son…_ Finally Kagome met his gaze, whatever hardness remaining within her dark orbs dissipating like the clouds after a summer squall. Her lower lip trembled, her eyes filling with moisture. The next thing Inuyasha knew, she had flung herself into his lap, wrapping her arms tightly around his neck and burying her face in his shoulder.

Inuyasha’s youki flared angrily, fighting against the sutra which kept him from reciprocating her display of affection. He was beset by an almost primal need to hold her, and being prevented from doing so would soon threaten to drive him mad. Fortunately Kagome sensed his inner struggle and reached up with a hand to remove the sutra. The instant the diabolical piece of paper left his skin, Inuyasha embraced his mate, ensconcing her within the folds of his haori. He shifted her more comfortably in his lap and held her as tightly as he dared, whispering soothing words against her hair. _I’m here, Kagome. Please don’t cry. I’m here, and I’m never leaving again._

"All right, back inside the house," he heard Mrs. Higurashi order. Kagome’s brother and grandfather began to protest, but one look from the matriarch of the family was enough to silence them. Inuyasha nodded in gratitude, a gesture which was hesitantly returned. He could tell that he and Mrs. Higurashi would be having a lengthy discussion later. While that was not something he looked forward to, he understood its necessity. She was hopefully going to be his mother-in-law; she deserved answers almost as much as Kagome did.

Speaking of Kagome, she remained in his lap, motionless except for the occasional involuntary shudder as she cried quietly against his haori. Inuyasha hated it, yet appreciated her tears at the same time. For these tears were not born of sadness, but of joy. He could understand why she would feel emotionally overwhelmed; he was having trouble keeping his own eyes dry, in fact. A few happy tears did manage to sneak past his eyelids, but he wore them with pride, only wiping them away as Kagome’s own sobs began to wind down to sniffles. Hoping she wouldn’t mind, Inuyasha finally gave into temptation and placed his hand against her belly. He swore he felt the child within kick, greeting his father physically as he had already greeted him with his youki. _My son…_ The realization stole his breath away. He would have been just as thrilled with a daughter, but to finally know the child’s gender, to be able to refer to him as a ‘him’ rather than an ‘it,’ was nothing short of amazing.

Kagome unwrapped her arms from around his neck and reached down to place her hand atop his own, entwining their fingers against her belly. Finally she pulled back enough to meet his gaze. Inuyasha’s breath caught in his throat. Her eyes were red and puffy from crying, and her cheeks were still too pale for his liking, but his heart leapt with the sheer brilliance of her smile. For a few blissful moments, their hearts beat as one. Kagome’s free hand came up to caress his cheek, as if to confirm that his presence was not a product of some wonderful dream.

"You’re back, Inuyasha," she murmured, her tone still somewhat uncertain. Inuyasha grinned.

"Yeah, wench, I’m back."

He cringed inwardly at his own words, suddenly fearing that he’d ruined the moment by using that nickname. But Kagome only chuckled, relaxing completely as though the sentiment had confirmed that he was actually real, rather than a figment of her imagination.

"I never realized how much I missed hearing that."

"Or ‘osuwari,’" he added honestly, joining her in quiet laughter.

"I could always see if Kaede-baa-chan can reactivate the spell…"

"Don’t you dare, wench."

Kagome’s eyes widened slightly in surprise at his confident response, and Inuyasha knew why. She understood how much he feared his youkai side, or rather, how much he used to fear it.

"I’m not afraid of that part of me anymore," he declared, his voice dropping into a grave tenor. "Even if I transform, I’ll never hurt the people I…care about."

Inuyasha knew at once that his serious statement had caused the jovial mood between them to shift. Was that for better or for worse? Was he flailing around in the dark with no sense of direction, or did he instinctively know where to go? Either way, as Kagome’s smile faded and she pulled back from his embrace, Inuyasha knew that the hard part of the conversation was just beginning.

"Come on, let’s go somewhere else," he proposed, helping Kagome to her feet. "Are you cold?"

She shook her head, which Inuyasha was grateful for. If she wasn’t cold, then they didn’t necessarily have to go inside. He was always more comfortable out here, in nature where he had grown up. Obviously a feudal era forest would be better, but he didn’t want to push his luck. This wasn’t all about him, after all. Fortunately, there was one place in this time where both of them could feel connected to past, present, and future. He led her there, his grip on her hand light enough so as to be easily broken. Kagome followed without resistance, but he could feel the awkwardness forming between them as they stopped under Goshinboku’s branches. When he turned to her with a silent question, she frowned. Instead of acquiescing to his nonverbal request to take her up into the tree, she led him over to the stone bench off to the side of the fenced in area. He tried to tell himself that it was only because of her condition, that she feared becoming sick if she perched too high off the ground. But with the suddenly somber atmosphere hanging over them, he couldn’t quite convince himself.

Kagome seated herself on the bench, her back and shoulders tensed, her hands wringing nervously in her lap. Inuyasha followed suit, crossing his arms and concealing his hands in the folds of his haori to avoid the same fidgeting. A space lay between them, only a fraction of a meter in reality, but appearing as an unfathomably deep canyon to Inuyasha. This is where all of his hastily-constructed resolve should come in. The only way to bridge that ever-widening gap was to open up to Kagome more than he’d ever opened up to anyone in his entire life. But every potential way his mind could conjure up to begin that conversation sounded stupid, and the fear of saying the wrong thing left him hopelessly paralyzed. Kagome let the oppressive silence drag on for a time, but eventually she took the burden of speaking first upon herself.

"So…how did you break free of Hakago’s control?"

Inuyasha grimaced, glad that the ice had been broken but not especially pleased by the initial topic of conversation.

"Kikyou freed me," he answered simply. Kagome must have seen something in his expression, because her next question was delivered as though she already knew the answer.

"Is she…okay?"

Inuyasha’s eyes lowered, his shoulders slumping with old pain. "No, she…passed on."

"I see. I’m sorry, Inuyasha," Kagome stated sincerely, her voice colored with sorrow. At that moment, Inuyasha could not imagine her sadness to be anything other than genuine sympathy.

"Thanks," he replied, allowing his mind to drift back to Kikyou’s last sunset, the evening when they had bade each other goodbye for the final time. The ensuing silence stretched on for several minutes, and as the setting of the sun cast the world in shades of gloom, the imaginary canyon between hanyou and miko grew wider and more foreboding. Finally Kagome spoke, her attempt at a lighter tone failing miserably.

"I…I-I’m glad you’re back. It’s g-great that our child won’t have to grow up without a father."

Inuyasha started at the sound of her voice, breaking from his mournful musings only to be driven into profound confusion by her statement. He frowned as he gazed at her. How could her words be so at odds with her tone and body language? Her back was straight as a rod, her hands clutching her knees as if needing the support. Her lower lip was held so tightly between her teeth that it was a wonder she hadn’t drawn blood. Most disturbing of all, she kept her eyes glued firmly to the pavement in front of her, refusing to permit even the smallest chance of making eye contact with him.

Even her words were strange. Her hesitation, her difficulty in getting them out, and the content itself…none of it was what Inuyasha had expected. ‘I’m glad you’re back’ should have been ‘I’m glad to have you back.’ Or there should have been some acknowledgement that he was not solely the father of her child, but also the man she intended to spend her life with. The complete absence of anything of the sort was downright frightening. Had he been wrong about her feelings? Did she…still love him? Before he could spend much time contemplating that dreaded question, Kagome stood suddenly.

"I’m tired," she declared miserably. "I’m going to lie down."

The scent of her renewed tears hit Inuyasha like some great oni’s fist. Though receiving a bludgeoning from said oni would be preferable to this, scrambling around blindly in the dark hoping not to fall. But he was already losing his balance. This was wrong, all wrong. Kagome’s hesitation, her tears, the sorrow he could feel radiating off of her, it was all… An epiphany came upon him suddenly, just as his mind was turning down a dark path, forged by decades of loneliness and self-loathing. The greatest wrong here would be to attribute Kagome’s rejection to a change in romantic feelings. She still loved him. How he knew this, he couldn’t say, but it came from deep within, an almost instinctual source. Perhaps it was his heart speaking to him? In any case, for once Inuyasha decided to listen.

In doing so, he realized something which he had not noticed before. If Kagome no longer loved him, why would she seem so close to breaking down emotionally? Informing him would be difficult, for sure, and perhaps she would cry when she did so. But not like this. Her scent would speak of sadness and sympathy, not crushing despair. Her eyes would no doubt reflect that same sympathy, but they would also plead with him to understand and implore him to remain in her life as a friend and co-parent. Most crucially, she would _look_ at him rather than doing her absolute best _not_ to look at him.

So if Kagome’s behavior did not indicate that her feelings for him had changed, then what was the cause? Did she believe that _his_ feelings had changed? Her words would support that assumption. It didn’t seem quite right, but he was out of contemplation time. Kagome was already striding away from him, each footstep like the tolling of hell’s bells, counting down toward the expiration of his existence. For he sensed that if he allowed her to walk away now, whatever the two of them might have had together would perish. He would never get another chance.

"Wait, Kagome!"

Fueled by desperation, he leapt to his feet and closed the distance between them in an instant, grabbing her wrist and pulling her to a halt. His grip was no doubt slightly uncomfortable for her, but that was the point. He _couldn’t_ let her get away. If that meant restraining her physically for a brief time until she agreed to listen to him, until she _looked_ at him, then so be it. Even with her arm pulled behind her and her body twisted to the side, Kagome still refused to raise her eyes. It was disturbing enough to finally spur Inuyasha to truly _say_ something for the first time in the entire conversation.

"Kagome…I, I mean, you—" Growling to himself, he took a quick breath to jumble together his thoughts. "Kagome, being a father to our child is not the _only_ thing I came back here for…"

There. Inuyasha mentally patted himself on the back. It wasn’t explicit and hadn’t been delivered with the meaningful tone he was looking for, but Kagome would understand that statement. It was clear that she did, though again her reaction was not what the hanyou was expecting. She closed her eyes and shook her head as a small sigh of pure misery escaped her, a woman resigned to her fate and wondering why arriving at said fate had to be so difficult.

"I think it is."

Inuyasha’s eyes narrowed. Just as he thought, she was making stupid assumptions about his motives and desires. The misunderstanding should be easily correctable…if he could find the words. Perhaps his rising irritation would help with that? So long as the words didn’t have to be flowery or especially mature, that is.

"No, it’s not, wench."

"I truly think it is."

"No, Kagome, it’s n—"

"In any case!" she interrupted sharply. "The father of your child is all that you are going to be. Now release me."

"Not until you shut up for a second and listen to me!" Inuyasha retorted, stepping toward her and tightening his grip.

"I said, _release me!!!_ "

Inuyasha cried out as a burst of reiki sent sparks of pain lancing through his hand. He abandoned his grip out of reflex, stumbling back a couple steps in shock. A hint of remorse leaked past the fury blazing in Kagome’s eyes, but she was obviously in no state of mind to apologize. Instead she turned and resumed her march to the house. Now fueled by anger as well as desperation, Inuyasha took off in pursuit, matching her stride for stride as he glared sideways at her.

"What the fuck is wrong with you, Kagome? I came back here to be with you. _With_ you! Isn’t that what you wanted?!"

"So what?!" she shrieked, turning suddenly to face him with both fists clenched at her sides. "Since when have I _ever_ gotten what I wanted in this relationship?"

Inuyasha’s jaw flapped like that of a fish stranded on a riverbank, and his eyes flew wide as true comprehension began to dawn. But Kagome was nowhere near finished.

"I gave up over a year of my life for you, Inuyasha. Not for Naraku and not for the damn jewel. For _you_. I gave you my virginity and then carried your child for over eight months. And did I ever so much as balk at the so-called ‘commitment’ you tried to feed me? No, like a fool I accepted your shit, hoping that one day you would return my feelings. And what is my reward? Only disappointment and heartache."

She sighed, raising her hand to her temple as if the conversation was making her physically ill. When she dropped her arms to her sides moments later, she was a completely different person.

"Go ahead and tell me that you love me, Inuyasha," she stated, her tone harsh but pleading with him to understand. "I’ll believe you. I’m sure that you do love me, in some sense. And I’m sure your intentions in wanting to be with me are honorable. But you love Kikyou. You _chose_ Kikyou. And that is something I cannot accept if we’re going to be together.

"This is going to sound cruel, but I don’t know how else to say it. I refuse to be your consolation prize, Inuyasha. You have feelings for two women, and since only one of them is able to be with you now, the decision has basically been made for you. I understand that. But since deep down you wish that Kikyou could occupy the empty place by your side, I will not take it. I am not that kind of woman. I would rather stay just friends, or if you can’t accept that, then we…we will never see each other again except for our child’s sake."

Inuyasha lowered his head until his bangs covered the upper half of his face, his eyes glowing with cold rage. _Those bastards…_ But then, he couldn’t blame this solely on Miroku and Sango, now could he? _You did a stupid thing, you dumbass. You told them to convince Kagome not to chase you, then asked them to tell her something which would definitely make her_ want _to chase you!_ It was obvious which of the two directives their friends had given priority. And now Kagome thought he only wanted to be with her because Kikyou was dead. She _still_ thought she was second best. He would figure out who to blame for this later—himself, most likely—but for now he simply prayed that he could repair the damage the fateful omission had caused.

"They didn’t tell you, did they?" he rasped without raising his head.

"W-What?" Kagome stuttered, obviously caught off guard by the question. "Who didn’t tell me what?"

"Miroku and Sango! Did they tell you what I said just before I took Hakago from you?"

"They said you had asked them not to let me go looking for you. What does that have to do with anything?"

"Not _that_ ," he grumbled, simultaneously relieved that his hypothesis was correct, and dreading having to repeat the words to her face. "What I said was…was…"

"It doesn’t m—"

"It _does_ matter, Kagome!" he yelled, finally raising his head to lock eyes with her. She gasped at the fierceness of his expression, his emotions now unconcealed by hesitation and nerves. No longer would such things keep him from saying what needed to be said. That didn’t mean it was easy.

"Dammit…what I said was…I chose you."

A rapid intake of air was the only audible sign Kagome gave that she’d heard him, but her expression morphed into one of profound disbelief, colored by the barest hints of hope. It was the latter which Inuyasha latched onto for support as he continued to strip off the armour covering his heart, piece by stubborn piece.

"By then, I had made my decision. Whether or not Kikyou was still alive, I chose you. _You_ , Kagome." He snorted softly, averting his gaze. "It was always you. Even when I was too stupid to realize it." Silence settled over them for several long moments before Kagome spoke.

"I—I don’t…"

"Believe me?" he finished. _Trust me?_ A glanced revealed that he’d hit the nail on the head. No matter how badly she wanted to believe him, those words alone were not enough to convince her. Not after he’d so foolishly mourned after Kikyou in Kagome’s presence earlier. It had been just that, mourning, but Kagome had obviously taken it to mean much more. He supposed he could just tell her to talk to Miroku and Sango to verify his story, but what would that prove? Only that he was still a closed off little boy incapable of revealing his true feelings to anyone. Such a spineless person was unworthy of Kagome’s love. Starting today, he would no longer be that kind of man.

"I’ll tell you when I first realized…my feelings. It was inside the youkai graveyard. Were you conscious for any of that?" he asked, wondering if her experiences while possessed by Hakago were similar to his own. A small nod from her confirmed it. "I never should have been able to penetrate Housenki’s ‘unbreakable’ armour. Do you know what finally allowed me to beat him?"

Kagome gave a tiny shake of her head, and Inuyasha sensed that she would hold her breath until he answered his own question, even if it mean asphyxiating herself. Still the hanyou took a few moments to prepare himself, to utter this word for perhaps the first time in his adult life. He refused to stutter, or to feel any uncertainty when he gave voice to this truest of emotions, the single syllable with the power to change everything.

"Love."

Kagome’s gasp resounded into the night. By her own admission, she had prepared herself to hear and reject such a confession from him this evening. But not like this. Not with his eyes glowing like that or in the midst of a lengthy explanation of how all of her assumptions about their relationship were wrong. An explanation which both pulled at her heartstrings and was starting to make deeply logical sense. Still struck speechless, the miko watched as her hanyou removed another piece of armour from around his heart, discarding it like trash, never to be worn in her presence again.

"Thinking of you…gave me the strength to break Housenki’s armour. It also kept me from losing myself when I grabbed the corrupted Shikon fragment. Ever since then, it’s kept me alive. Without it, I wouldn’t be here right now. Without you, Kagome…I’d be lost.

"You said earlier that you would believe me if I told you that…I loved you. Well, now you’ve heard me say it twice. Do you believe me?"

Inuyasha stood tall, feeling more alive than he’d ever felt before, and more nervous as well. He still couldn’t believe he’d managed to get all of that out, but once he got started the words had flowed out one after another, like water bursting through a dam. He gazed at her, willing his eyes to reflect the silent truth—that when he spoke of love, he did not mean ‘in some sense.’ He meant in _all_ senses, in every possible way a man could love a woman. And he didn’t mean only until death did them part; this was for all eternity. If eventually fate placed them on opposite sides of the great divide between life and death, then their souls would reunite when both of them crossed over. Most importantly, he would never long for Kikyou, or dwell on what might have been but for her premature death. He had chosen Kagome, the woman he truly loved. Many months ago had he made the choice, only realizing it later, and confessing it later still. Now with his heart laid bare before her, it was up to Kagome to accept him. He could not offer her anything more than he was right now; he had nothing left to give. He could only pray that it was enough.

Kagome stared at him for some time, her expression revealing a great internal conflict. Inuyasha observed silently, determined to give her the time she needed, especially when it appeared that her state of mind was gradually turning in his favor. Faith and love rose to battle for her consciousness, slowly overcoming the stubborn doubt which had taken hold there. But her previous convictions refused to disperse so easily, and eventually she averted her gaze and took to biting her lower lip. Inuyasha recognized the gesture. As much as Kagome wanted to believe him, she needed more. For he still had not answered the question which had always caused a rift to form between them. _What about Kikyou?_ The elder miko was dead, but in what emotional state had she returned to the afterlife? Did she expect to reunite with her beloved when he finally joined her in death? Inuyasha had tried to answer this question by visual rather than vocal means, but he did not blame Kagome for needing to hear the words. Some things were simply too important to communicate in silence, as clearly illustrated by their conversation this evening. For once, Inuyasha decided not to make Kagome ask the question.

"Kikyou…was not killed by Hakago," he stated, overcoming the sudden tightness in his throat. His sadness was still fresh, but it was not strong enough to prevent him from moving forward.

"She wasn’t killed," he repeated after a short but heavy pause. "Kikyou… _chose_ to die, because…because she accepted how I feel about you. And…how you feel about me."

Kagome’s gaze turned contemplative as if she realized something for the first time. Perhaps it was the fact that the piece of soul which Kikyou stole from her should have been returned when the other miko passed on. She closed her eyes and her spiritual energy flared up, its focus inward. Her eyelids twitched as though searching for something, some hidden truth, some element of Kikyou’s consciousness which might have returned with the soul, and which might reveal the elder miko’s feelings.

Inuyasha could tell exactly when Kagome found what she was looking for. Her reiki subsided abruptly, and she lowered her head, tears pooling swiftly behind her closed eyelids and flowing down her cheeks. When she raised her head moments later and once more revealed her beautiful eyes to his questing gaze, all of the doubt had vanished.

Nothing more needed to be said. Kagome finally accepted his feelings, completely and without reservation. But to his own surprise, Inuyasha was not yet ready to end his confession. There was one more thing he wanted to say. It was a strange sensation for a man so used to avoiding serious conversation at all costs. But his heart would not be satisfied until it had shed every bit of armour, and one stubborn piece remained. Not for long.

"You’re the one I chose, Kagome, the only woman I want. If you’ll have me…I’m yours. Now, and forever."

Kagome’s bottom lip quivered, but a brilliant smile quickly spread over her features, even as more moisture pooled in her eyes.

"I’ll have you, Inuyasha," she stated softly. "Now, and forever."

She opened her arms in invitation, and Inuyasha did not waste a moment in striding over and embracing her tightly. And as she wrapped her arms around his back, he was enveloped in a sensation of indescribable warmth. He was finally where he belonged. He was finally home.

He and Kagome remained that way for several minutes, as she cried lightly into his haori. Inuyasha was unsuccessful at completely restraining his own tears, though he did not try very hard. Such a thing was no longer important. Eventually her periodic shuddering ceased, and she simply breathed deeply through her nose. Inuyasha thought she might have been savoring his scent, as he had been doing ever since first embracing her. That would be a little strange, since humans had such bad noses, but no stranger than the fact that she loved him in the first place. That was the single greatest miracle the world had ever seen, and he would spend the rest of his life cherishing it.

A cold wind blew in suddenly, fluttering Kagome’s dress and causing the young miko to shiver against him. For the first time, Inuyasha realized how dark it had become, to say nothing of the ominous clouds moving in overhead. He needed to get his pregnant mate out of the elements before the weather took a turn for the worse.

"Come on, let’s go inside."

His arm around her shoulder, he led Kagome toward the front door. She stopped him after only a few steps, motioning to her bedroom window instead. Both of them blushed lightly, but Inuyasha realized quickly enough that there was no romantic meaning behind her proposal. Apparently Kagome didn’t want to face her family right now either. Especially not after they had probably heard the two of them yelling at each other during the climax of their argument. He grimaced. _I told Kagome to shut up, then asked what the fuck was wrong with her._ Yep, it was definitely best to avoid the other Higurashis this evening. His behavior could be calmly explained away, but he was in no shape to do that tonight. And with Kagome’s emotions also frayed, both of them needed the time alone, just the two of them.

He shielded her with his body as he led her over to the side of the house. He felt the first drops of rain on his head as he leapt up to open the window, grateful that Kagome had not locked it. The miko too sensed what was coming and practically fell into his arms as he descended. He carried them over the threshold with only seconds to spare, setting her down and closing the window just as the clouds opened.

His mild thrill at the close escape abated as soon as he turned to look at her. Kagome swayed slightly where she stood, her shoulders slumped and her eyes drooping with fatigue. Now that the excitement was over, her condition was finally catching up to her. Without a word he strode over to her bedside and held open the covers, eyeing her expectantly. She nodded gratefully, lying down and curling onto her side facing him as he tucked the sheets over her shoulder. His hands lingered a bit longer near her face than necessary, but she didn’t seem to mind. When he finally straightened his back, however, Inuyasha was struck by a sense of uncertainty. Kagome’s eyes were closed but she was not asleep. This was a bit of uncharted territory. Where was he supposed to go and what was he supposed to do? Figuring she would tell him if she wanted him to leave, he moved to assume his customary place under her window. That seemed too far away, however, so he stopped himself and instead sat next to her bed, his back resting against her nightstand. Again, Kagome didn’t seem to mind, and he heaved a quiet sigh of relief.

The first sign that something was amiss was the subtle shift in Kagome’s scent. Inuyasha looked over to find her frowning, and when she opened her eyes he found them swirling with unasked questions.

"Kagome—"

"I’m going to the restroom," she interrupted, rising stiffly from the bed and making her way to the door. Inuyasha watched her go, trying to tamp down on his rising panic. Perhaps she just wanted some time to gather her thoughts, or maybe she honestly needed to relieve herself? Their kid must be sitting right on her bladder now. Either way, when she returned he would get her to tell him what was bothering her. Whatever it was, he could alleviate her concerns. He had finally managed to tell her that he loved her; he figured there wasn’t much that could stump him at this point. Something was indeed still troubling Kagome when she returned minutes later, but Inuyasha waited until she was settled in bed once more before speaking.

"Tell me what’s wrong, Kagome," he spoke, in a tone which was less demanding than it was pleading. Her frown deepened, and she deliberately averted her gaze, but after a moment’s hesitation she did begin to speak.

"I just…I know that Hakago corrupted your heart like he did mine. But at the time, you said that you had chosen me. So you understood your own feelings, and you must have known how I felt about you. And we were going to have a baby together!" she cried, her voice rising in frustration before she lowered it once more. "I don’t understand Inuyasha. What darkness could Hakago have found in your heart?"

Inuyasha did his best not to grimace. It was a legitimate question, and not an unexpected one. And as much as he didn’t want to share the details of how he’d been tricked, he realized that it might not be possible to hide them any longer. Not from Kagome.

"It was stupid," he tried, immediately knowing that explanation would not fly. "Look, I…I mean, at the time, I still didn’t remember…the night when our child was conceived, okay?" he told her, his words rushed and his tone defensive. "Hakago showed me the memory—not the whole thing though, just a piece of it. And…that piece of memory made it look like…I had forced myself on you against your will."

"That’s ridiculous!" Kagome retorted immediately. "I wouldn’t have refused you, especially when I was drunk and all my inhibitions were lowered. And even if I had, you wouldn’t have… _raped_ me, Inuyasha." Her voice was almost accusing, as though even an idiot would know her statements to be true. He couldn’t tell if she was more upset about his misreading of her consent or his lack of faith in his own honor.

"I know that!" he snapped, quickly reigning in his temper. He leaned his head back against the nightstand, taking a deep breath. The last thing he wanted was another fight, and when he looked at Kagome again he found an element of apology in her gaze as well. But she still silently demanded an explanation, and he knew refusing was not an option.

"Like I said," he continued softly, his voice weighed down by shame, "Hakago only showed me a little piece of the memory. If I had seen any of the rest of it, I would’ve known it wasn’t true. I don’t think I truly believed it anyway. But what I saw…for just a few moments I doubted myself, and that’s all it took for Hakago to take control. It was just a mo—"

"A moment of weakness," Kagome finished sadly, appearing as though she understood that sentiment well enough. Her eyes darkened with a memory of her own. _She’s thinking about how Hakago corrupted her heart,_ Inuyasha realized. Oddly, he felt no desire to ask her about her own experience with the manipulative infant. Perhaps because he already had a pretty good idea of what ‘darkness’ Hakago had discovered in Kagome’s heart. It definitely stemmed from him, at any rate, and that was not something they needed to talk about, especially not now when things were already awkward enough between them.

"I’m sorry, Kagome," Inuyasha stated sincerely. "You suffered because I was too stupid to see through Hakago’s trick." After a moment’s pause, he added miserably, "A lot of people suffered."

He turned away, too ashamed to face her. He heard her pull back the covers and rise from the bed, and wondered whether the reminder of his crimes would drive her away after all. Then he sensed her kneeling behind him, and felt her arms settle around his shoulders as she embraced him from behind. He gasped, at once identifying the source of his déjà vu. Her pose was slightly different due to her swollen belly, but this was the same way she’d held him after he had slaughtered Gatenmaru’s bandits. At that time, he’d desperately longed for her continued acceptance, pleaded for her comfort without even realizing it. Now he understood how badly he needed her reassurance, and he had a feeling that Kagome knew it.

"Inuyasha," she said quietly, her words soothing the open wounds marring his soul. "I understand."

He choked back a sob at the familiar words. That she was treating him the same now as she had back then…he couldn’t describe how much it meant to him. Here, as before, she offered no additional assurances. None were needed. She understood that he was a good person, and that he had fought as hard as he could to prevent innocent people from being hurt. She understood as no one else could how he had suffered while trapped within his own body. And she accepted how terrible he felt about the innocents who had become victims, and silently promised to help him move past his guilt and forward with his life. Here, as always, she was by his side, offering her comfort. This time, however, Inuyasha mustered the courage to tell her how much he appreciated it.

"T-Thank you, Kagome," he whispered, grasping her hand tightly like the lifeline it was. He felt her shake her head.

"There’s no need to th—"

"There is," he interrupted. "I meant it when I said I’d be lost without you. You’re always there for me. Every time I need you."

"Not every time," she muttered sadly. "We tried so hard to find you…but we failed. It’s only thanks to Kikyou that you’re here right now."

"That’s not true," he retorted, glad that this subject had come up. Kagome’s remorse was driven not by jealousy, but by guilt caused by her failure. _As if her failures could_ ever _hold a candle to mine!_ But that was his mate, selfless to the last. And he was thrilled to be able to tell how wrong she was.

"Kikyou said that when you purified Naraku’s miasma, you healed her. In some ways, I think her heart was already corrupted, ever since that witch Urasue resurrected her. But the light you left behind helped Kikyou move past her bitterness. By the time she tracked me down…she was like a completely different person. She was like the miko I knew fifty years ago, but without any of the mistrust or weariness of the world she had back then. You did that, Kagome. You probably didn’t even mean to, but your heart is so pure that you healed Kikyou without even realizing it. Without that, she either would have lost to Hakago or she would have dragged me to hell after freeing me. Either way, I’d be lost.

"So when I say that you’re always there for me, I mean it. Don’t doubt yourself, okay?"

For several long moments, Kagome gave no response and Inuyasha held his breath. Then she leaned forward and kissed his cheek, the honored shift in her scent revealing to the hanyou that all was well.

"Okay, Inuyasha. Thank you."

He nodded once, and the pair lapsed into companionable silence, Kagome still embracing him from behind. Inuyasha could again sense her fatigue, and knew that she would go back to bed soon. For the moment, he simply wished to enjoy this time with her, now that he was finally comfortable letting their conversation draw to a close. They would talk more tomorrow, he was sure. About his feelings, about the things Hakago had done while possessing his body, and most importantly about their future. They would grow closer once more, emotionally and physically. No matter how long it took, he would banish every iota of doubt from Kagome’s mind. And he, Inuyasha, an orphaned half-breed with no wealth or social skills to speak of, would become the mate and husband she deserved.

But that was for tomorrow. For tonight, they would heal quietly in each other’s embrace, for as long as either of them needed.


	46. Growing Together

Kagome lay on her bed, propped up against several pillows which were piled to make a comfortable backrest. Her eyes scanned the open pages of the book in her hands, but her mind did not truly process the words. She couldn’t quite suppress a smirk at the sound of Inuyasha stomping up the stairs.

He shoved open her door, then plodded over and flopped on the bed next to her in overly dramatic fashion, heaving an exhausted sigh. Kagome rolled her eyes, but Inuyasha didn’t see it with his arm resting across his forehead, as though attempting to block out the electric lighting so he could get some much-needed rest. He’d worn his modern-era clothing at her insistence, and the first thing he’d done upon entering her room was check to make sure that his fire-rat robes and Tetsusaiga were exactly where he’d left them. Kagome chuckled and shook her head, causing Inuyasha to lower his arm and glare up at her.

"What’s so funny, wench?" he demanded in a grumpy tone.

"Nothing," she replied lightly. "Just thinking how _nice_ it was of you to offer to walk my friends home."

He snorted. "‘Offer,’ she says. More like I ‘was volunteered’ to be ambushed by your harpy friends. You planned that, didn’t you?"

She shrugged. "Well, I could tell that they wanted to talk to you alone. I figured you would be better off getting it over with. How did it go?"

"Keh. I don’t _need_ your friends telling me how to be a good ‘boyfriend.’"

"I know you don’t," Kagome replied honestly, "but it made them feel better about us being together. You were nice to them, right?"

He glared at her again. "I’m a man, aren’t I? I’m not going to yell at a bunch of girls who are only looking out for you."

"I knew that too," she answered with a sincere smile. "And I haven’t gotten any angry phone calls telling me to break up with you since you dropped them off, so I think we’re in the clear."

"Keh. Nosy women can’t mind their own damn business…"

"Oh, don’t pout, Inuyasha. I really do appreciate you doing that for me."

"I don’t pout, wench," he retorted, though her words had seemingly taken the edge off of his previous irritation. It couldn’t have been easy for him, being interrogated and lectured by three teenage girls, but he’d put up with it for her sake and she was grateful. Maintaining the relationship she wanted with her friends meant their accepting that Inuyasha was back in her life, and in a more fully committed capacity. Good progress had been made on that front today, though she was sure they weren’t quite there yet. She had invited them over after school for an undisclosed reason, surprising them with Inuyasha’s presence. They’d listened to her semi-fictional explanation about where he’d been all this time, and had expressed happiness that the two of them were back together. But her friends had obviously been waiting impatiently for an opportunity to talk to Inuyasha alone, so she’d obliged. It was better to get everyone’s concerns out in the open right away, rather than letting them fester unaddressed. She trusted Inuyasha to determine how much to tell them, and to handle the situation like a mature adult. _Well, mature enough, anyway._ She was sure the hanyou had fired back a few times, but he’d apparently kept his temper in check and given her friends enough reassurance to accept their relationship, at least provisionally.

Amused by his denial to his very obvious pouting, Kagome reached down and started to massage his ear between her fingers the way he liked. He flicked the fuzzy appendage out of her grasp, but when she didn’t resume her ministrations he glanced up to her as if to ask why. In other circumstances she might play dumb, but here she decided to let him get away with his childish behavior. He had been a man when it counted, but she liked the innocent side of him too. She could sense the tension flowing out of him as she massaged his tender flesh, sometimes running her fingers through the hair at the top of his head. His eyes closed and his breathing became deep and regular; if she didn’t know him better, she might assume that he was asleep.

Rubbing his ears was therapeutic for her as well. It satisfied her desire for physical contact, a yearning which she knew Inuyasha felt as well. She could see it in his eyes, sense it through his fingertips when he rubbed her belly, or placed his ear against it for long periods of time, just listening to his child. It had been five days since his return, and they had yet to share anything more in terms of physical intimacy. They had not even embraced since the night of his return. Inuyasha still slept while sitting on the floor, his back resting against her nightstand.

It had initially surprised Kagome to realize that none of this worried her. She had nearly kissed him several times over the past couple days, or vice versa. The near misses left her feeling awkward and embarrassed, and perhaps somewhat distressed, but never overly concerned. Whatever held them back would pass, of that she was confident. Her feelings for Inuyasha had never changed, and he had given her no cause to doubt that he wanted everything she did. And though he had not said the words since the night of his return, she knew he still loved her.

So the fact that she and Inuyasha had not leapt right into each other’s arms did not cause Kagome to question the strength of their relationship. Said relationship was a work in progress, but it was coming along. In many ways, Inuyasha was still the scared young man who she had fallen in love with. But both of them had done a lot of growing up through their recent adventures. They were taking things slow, as adults. The place they were currently at was comfortable for both of them, though Kagome did feel the growing urge to take things to the next level, and she knew Inuyasha did too. When they were ready, they would go there together. In the meantime, she would continue to adjust to having him in her life again, after weeks of preparing to raise a child without him. It would take some time, but she was certainly warming up to the idea.

She would also continue to move forward with other aspects of her life. Well, some aspects. The Shikon no Tama was one subject on which she and Inuyasha had agreed to maintain the status quo for now. No one knew whether the bone eater’s well would continue to function once the power of the jewel vanished from this world, and she wanted her mother to meet her grandchild at least once before taking the risk of never seeing her again. Inuyasha had offered to live in the modern era with her instead, but she had refused. The feudal era was his home, and their child would have a better life there surrounded by people who accepted him for who he was, rather than constantly having to conceal his true nature from a world which did not even comprehend the existence of his kind. Besides, leaving her family from five hundred years in the past would be almost as hard as leaving the one she had grown up with. Kagome obviously hoped that the well would retain its temporal power, but if not, she had already chosen where she would make her home. She had not told Souta or Jii-chan yet, but her mother understood her reasons and accepted her decision.

The moment of truth in that regard was fast approaching. The baby would probably be born in three weeks or so, and more than ever she was looking forward to motherhood. After more than eight months, she was tired of being pregnant. She did her best to stay healthy and retain her independence, but doing much of anything made her tired these days and everyone around her was willing to help. Especially Inuyasha, who could come across as overbearing at times. Once she had snapped at him to leave her alone, then later atoned with a tearful apology. But the hanyou backed off just a little after that, and she had managed to avoid any further outbursts.

She had also been fairly cold to him on the second evening of their reunion. They had talked throughout the day about a variety of topics, and finally Inuyasha described in detail Kikyou’s final moments. It still bothered Kagome a little that he had kissed the older miko, but she knew it would pass. Feeling jealous was stupid, given that Inuyasha had chosen her. He had simply been trying to ease Kikyou’s suffering as best he could. Her final moments on Earth had been full of joy, in contrast to the rest of her existence. The kind, understanding part of Kagome was glad that Inuyasha had made it so, and she was sure the rest of her would catch up soon.

She was also in the process of making peace with Miroku and Sango’s decision to withhold Inuyasha’s statement concerning his choice. Initially it had been about convincing her to give priority to the baby’s health, as she suspected. Later, as their odds of ever seeing the hanyou again decreased, they confessed that they simply wanted to spare her any additional pain. Kagome understood that, and in fact they were probably right—knowing how Inuyasha felt would likely have made it more difficult for her to move on. Doing so had already proven a major challenge. Ultimately, she wished that her friends had been honest with her and allowed her to deal with the consequences. But they had done what they thought was best, and were motivated by their concern and affection for her, so she knew she would forgive them soon as well.

"Kagome?" Inuyasha called softly, pulling her from her musings.

"Yes?" She glanced down at him only to see him look away, a hint of a blush coloring his cheeks. Her eyes widened slightly, her heartbeat quickening as she pondered the reason for his nervousness.

"I, uh…do you want to go to a ‘moo-vee’ tomorrow?" he asked, the word sounding foreign on his tongue.

Kagome blinked in surprise. "Inuyasha, are you asking me out on a date?"

"W-w-well isn’t that what normal couples do in your time?!" he demanded defensively. "Unless…you don’t want to…"

"I’d love to," she replied honestly, beaming from ear to ear. His nervousness was incredibly endearing, and she didn’t even care that this idea could not possibly have originated from him. She sensed her friends’ hands in this—or rather, Ayumi’s hand. The wavy-haired girl lived a little farther from Higurashi shrine than Eri or Yuki; it had probably just been Ayumi and Inuyasha walking together at the very end. And while Ayumi had been led to believe that she and Inuyasha had been officially going out for some time, she had probably suggested to the hanyou to essentially start over with their relationship and try to make things romantic. Kagome would make it a point to thank her later.

Inuyasha grinned hesitantly in relief, then closed his eyes and wiggled his ears expectantly. Kagome rolled her eyes at his cheekiness, but nevertheless complied with his silent request. On the bright side, settling back into the ear massage alleviated what might otherwise have been a fairly awkward few minutes. She felt a little foolish at being so excited over such a simple thing. But it was thrilling, the prospect of behaving like a normal couple for a change. _Our first date._ She had to chuckle at that. _We seem to do things backward, Inuyasha and I._

As long as they eventually reached the place where both of them wanted to be, then she supposed it didn’t really matter how they got there.

* * *

"Stupid people," Kagome muttered under her breath.

They were stupid, the whole judgmental lot of them. She hadn’t gone out much since her condition became impossible to conceal, mostly just on outings with her mother. During said outings she tried to ignore the hundreds or thousands of strangers around her, most passing within the blink of an eye. But even that miniscule amount of time was enough to read facial expressions. Initial, almost instinctual reactions were often very revealing of a person’s true feelings, before learned politeness behavior kicked in.

Kagome was tired of being _reacted_ to. Some strangers looked upon her with pity, shaking their heads and turning to whisper to their companions about the poor, knocked-up teenager. Others glared at her with annoyance or contempt, as if her very presence offended their delicate sensibilities. Young people were the worst. Boys smirked, probably thinking how easy it was to get in her pants, while girls skirted around her as if she had the plague. At times Kagome felt like a walking campaign ad for abstinence, as though she had a giant sign around her neck. ‘See girls!’ it read. ‘This is what happens when you screw around!’

Some or even most of this was in her head, of course. She was sure that many of the people she saw on the street or at the pregnancy group weren’t even paying attention to her, or had something else on their minds as they looked in her general direction. Some of it also likely stemmed from those lovely little pregnancy hormones she had been reading about. But she was equally sure that some of it was real. And since it was nearly impossible to separate the legitimate from the imagined, her poor overwhelmed brain tended to read every little glance or facial expression as a judgment on her condition. It was maddening, and sometimes only a tight grip on her mother’s hand enabled her to keep her emotions in check. Her mother understood and was always ready to support her, but remained firm in her belief that her daughter needed to get out of the house. For her part, Kagome also wished to avoid becoming a shut-in, so she had borne the silent opinions of others without complaint.

Until today. If the status quo had continued, then it probably wouldn’t have bothered her too much. But Inuyasha’s presence had changed things for the better, which counterintuitively annoyed the hell out of Kagome. Her hanyou had dressed formally for their date—though ‘formal’ for Inuyasha meant a nicer set of jeans and short-sleeved shirt—and appeared to be a perfectly well-adjusted, if somewhat eccentric, young man. His presence magically transformed Kagome from ‘knocked-up slut’ to ‘young pregnant woman’ in the eyes of the ignorant masses. Perhaps the two of them were engaged or even married already, and had made the unusual but certainly acceptable choice to start a family young. Or perhaps the pregnancy was an accident, but the man responsible was sticking by her instead of running off. It was pretty ridiculous that the man’s actions should determine how the world looked at her, the woman, but that certainly appeared to be the case.

Hence the reason the people were all stupid.

"Kagome? Are you okay?"

She blinked, then glanced over at Inuyasha to find him frowning down at her, his eyes colored by rising concern. _Oh, damn. Snap out of it, Kagome! You’re making Inuyasha feel insecure._

"I’m fine, Inuyasha." He didn’t look like he believed her, so she reached over and grasped his hand, willing her irritation to melt away. "It’s nothing, really," she tried again, managing a sincere smile.

"Okay," he muttered, obviously still uncomfortable.

Kagome sighed. "If you really want to know what’s bothering me, I’ll tell you later. I promise it’s nothing you did, okay?"

Inuyasha relaxed visibly, probably as much at her willingness to confide in him as her assurance that he hadn’t done anything wrong. Reuniting during her final month of pregnancy had proven to be trying for both of them, so it was no surprise that he spent much of his time walking on eggshells. Kagome did not want him to have to do that today. This was about taking a step forward in their relationship, even a very minor one.

At last they arrived at the movie theater, though the phrase ‘at last’ could be considered out of place. The theater was only a few blocks from the shrine, after all, though the distance felt like a few kilometers to Kagome. She knew she would feel fatigue in her bones tonight, but she refused to allow her condition to interfere with her and Inuyasha’s day. The theater itself was small, with only two or three screens as opposed to one of those dozen-screen monstrosities. It was less crowded as a result, which Kagome certainly appreciated. Inuyasha paid for the tickets using currency her mother had given him, money ostensibly from the same ‘college fund’ which had covered a lot of baby-related expenses over the past several months. He then located the correct theater and led them toward it as if he’d done this a hundred times before. Kagome might have been impressed, if she hadn’t been concentrating so hard on ignoring the den of evil situated off to her right. _Ignore the snack counter, Kagome. You need to eat healthy. You’re going to have a nice dinner later with Inuyasha, so you shouldn’t be eating junk food. Resist the temptation. Resist the—_

"Want something to eat, Kagome?"

And just like that, game over. Temptation 1, Kagome 0.

"Some iwashi senbei, please," she muttered shamefully, knowing she was going to hate herself with every sweet, succulent bite. Inuyasha was only too eager to run off and fill her diabolical craving. She couldn’t blame him for it; he was just trying to make her happy. And he was! Her stomach especially was going to be _very_ happy when he returned.

Somehow she managed to make it to her seat before devouring the snack. The previews were just starting, so she had some time to catch her breath—in between bites of dried fish—before the movie began. Inuyasha had taken her to the one which Ayumi recommended, a romantic number which was supposed to make girls swoon and even men shed a tear or two. Halfway through the film, Kagome was far from swooning. It all seemed so…artificial. Boy meets girl, boy and girl fall in love, boy and girl experience some angst—if you could call it that—and though she hadn’t seen the ending, Kagome would assume it involved boy and girl making up and living happily ever after.

Before her fifteenth birthday, such a movie might have appealed to Kagome. But she had come to appreciate the difference between fantasy and reality. Some might consider her adventures in the feudal era to be fantasy, but it was also real, as was the love which had been forged through real adversity and real heartache. What she saw on the screen was the embodiment of an artificial romance which could never exist in the real world. And she was no longer interested in such a thing. Glancing over to gauge her companion’s opinion, Kagome nearly burst out laughing. The only tears Inuyasha seemed likely to shed were of boredom. He was trying so hard to pretend that he didn’t absolutely loathe this movie, but couldn’t quite pull it off.

"Do you want to leave, Inuyasha?"

He shook his head vigorously, a man attempting to resist the most seductive of temptations. "No, it’s…fine."

"Are you sure?" she asked amusedly. "I don’t really like it myself…"

"Then I fucking hate it!" he swore aloud, drawing the glares of several nearby patrons. "You don’t mind?" he asked in a much softer tone.

"Definitely not. Come on, there’s another movie showing here that might be more your style."

If that didn’t turn out to be the understatement of the year, Kagome didn’t know what was. Their second selection was an action movie import from the United States. She made sure it was a dubbed version because she was pretty sure that Inuyasha would not appreciate strange modern words flashing by him. She initially wondered if he would pepper her with questions, but that concern proved unfounded. The feudal era hanyou quickly became completely engrossed in his first high-budget, over-the-top Hollywood action movie. He practically leapt from his chair at the first spectacular car explosion, and when the bad guy finally met his end in a fiery inferno of ridiculous proportions, Inuyasha could be heard cheering. Kagome derived much of her enjoyment from watching him, but the movie wasn’t bad either. Thin plot? Yes. An insane amount of violence and an irresponsible number of explosions? Yes. More entertaining than that dumb romance movie? Hell yes.

The entertainment did not stop with the credits. Inuyasha was a bundle of energy as they made their way down the sidewalk afterward, jabbering on like a little kid intent on reliving every moment. Kagome’s head started to spin as she tried to keep up with him, but she had seldom seen him this excited before and was genuinely enjoying it.

"And remember when the guy drove the car into that thing with the spinner on top?"

"The helicopter."

"Yeah, and the guy flying it gets blown through the air and sucked into that other thing with the wings?"

"The jet plane."

"And then all of it explodes like crazy? That was fuckin’ awesome!"

"Yeah, that was pretty—ugh!"

All it took was a small grunt of discomfort from her to completely derail Inuyasha’s action movie adoration train.

"What’s wrong, Kagome? Are you okay?" he demanded, looping his arm around her shoulders for support.

"F-fine," she managed, wincing in pain. "My feet are just getting a little sore."

"Let’s go home."

"No! We’re almost to the restaurant," she declared, pointing to the sign on the building just up ahead. "I’ll feel better after I eat."

Inuyasha shot her a dubious look, but he helped her the rest of the way to the restaurant without further incident. Kagome heaved a relieved sigh as she plopped down in her chair. Her feet were more than a ‘little’ sore, and she had a feeling that Inuyasha knew it. She wasn’t sure she would be able to walk home after dinner, but that was a worry for later. Right now she was fully intent on enjoying her meal. She had taken Inuyasha to a teppanyaki restaurant. This particular one was popular with foreign tourists, so the hanyou’s hair and eye color didn’t stand out so much. And she knew he would enjoy seeing the food cooked in front of him, rather than prepared back in the kitchen. Kagome thought he might accept when offered sake, but instead he asked for water and passed her a sheepish look, to their mutual amusement.

Overall, dinner went very well. Inuyasha used his nose to avoid the few dishes which were too spicy for his liking, but the bulk of the cuisine was at least somewhat familiar to him and he certainly ate his fill. As did Kagome, though she could at least blame her appetite on the little one growing inside of her. Inuyasha was just a glutton, an observation he in no way denied when she put it to him. When she asked him if it was better than ramen, however, he never gave her a straight answer.

As Kagome feared, her feet were still painfully sore after the meal. Instead of heading directly home, however, she led Inuyasha toward a new destination.

"Where are we going, Kagome? Your house is in the other direction."

"We’re going to the taxi stand, Inuyasha. You remember those cars I told you about that take people where they need to go?"

"Yeah, but—oh, your feet still hurt bad, don’t they?" he asked, his ears lowering.

"Only a little," she lied. "I just don’t want to overdo it."

 

Inuyasha snorted, and in the next instant Kagome found herself scooped up in his arms and carried off into the nearest alley.

"Inuyasha! What are you doing?!"

"Keh. Relax, nobody saw me do that…I think."

"Inuyasha," she growled warningly.

"You’re not takin’ another step on those feet, Kagome," he stated firmly.

"I’m fine, Inu—"

"No, you’re not. Besides," he declared with a smirk, "what the hell do you need a ‘taxi’ for when you’ve got me?"

Kagome’s eyes widened as she realized what he had in mind. "Inuyasha, we can’t—"

"Why not? It’s dark out. Without those lights in the street you humans wouldn’t be able to see shit. And there aren’t any lights up where we’re going."

"B-but," she stuttered, struggling to come up with a reason to continue arguing her point. "Um…"

"Don’t you trust me, Kagome?"

Those drooping ears, those pleading eyes, and that dejected tone sealed it for Kagome. Since she couldn’t come up with a logical reason to refuse him, said refusal would necessarily have to stem from lack of trust. That was simply not an issue, and she did not wish to give Inuyasha any reason to think otherwise. It would wound him deeply for no good reason. If he trusted himself to carry her and their child back home, then she trusted him as well.

"Okay, but—kyaa!"

Kagome’s heart dropped somewhere next to her stomach as her bearer pulled a sudden, gravity-defying leap to the top of the adjacent building.

"You were saying, wench?" he teased, grinning roguishly. She bit back an ‘osuwari’—the rosary no longer worked, but Inuyasha still cringed in the most satisfying way when she uttered the spell. Instead she fixed him with a stern glare.

"I was _going_ to tell you not to go too faaaaaaaaaaaaaaast!!!"

By the time her lungs emptied, Kagome’s scream had turned to laughter. _Kami, I never realized how much I missed this!_ It was not exactly the same as it used to be, since she could only ‘ride’ Inuyasha bridal-style and the trees and grass of his home world had been replaced by concrete and tar. But still Kagome loved every moment of it. There was something exhilarating about letting go, releasing any semblance of control and leaving everything to Inuyasha. She reveled in the almost natural trust, the absolute knowledge that despite their high-speed maneuvering, she was as safe at this moment as she had ever been in her entire life. She had not enjoyed herself so much, or felt so carefree, in a long time.

Inuyasha deliberately took longer than necessary to reach the shrine; he was likely relishing this as much as she was. He did not release her once his feet touched down on the deserted grounds, instead continuing to hold her tightly as he gazed down at her. His lungs contracted rapidly with moderately heavy breathing, which Kagome sensed was caused by more than physical exertion. Her smile faded as she gazed up into his bright golden eyes, both sets of orbs widening as they comprehended the precipice they stood upon. The intimacy which both of them desired was finally within their reach. It quickened heartbeats and frayed nerves, but neither of them shied away.

Inuyasha leaned in, hesitantly at first, then more confidently as Kagome’s fingers cupped the back of his head, drawing him down to meet her. They sighed in unison as their lips connected, hearts swelling as they rejoiced in newfound closeness, healing wounds old and new. For those seconds of blissful utopia, they were one. When their lips finally parted, they leaned their foreheads together, neither able to restrain the contented smiles which tugged at the corners of their mouths. And they were content, despite the mutual desire to engage in more than a chaste kiss. But taking things slowly was working, and more importantly, ‘merely’ kissing made both of them extremely happy. It was enough, at least for tonight.

The magic ended as soon as Inuyasha set Kagome on her feet, at the miko’s insistence. Just as quickly she found herself back in his arms, this time with no thoughts of protesting being carried inside the house. If the throbbing pain in her lower extremities was any indication, she would need crutches to walk to her room from here. Inuyasha now wore the scowl of a man simultaneously annoyed at his beloved for overdoing it, and blaming himself for allowing her to do so. Kagome grinned sheepishly up at him as her hand snuck to the top of his head and latched onto an ear. Said appendage flicked away in irritation, but only briefly.

"Tadaima!" she called softly as Inuyasha stepped gingerly through the doorway. Jii-chan could very well be asleep by now, and Souta was probably in his room playing a computer game or finishing his homework. Sure enough, only her mother’s voice drifted in from the living room, the only room downstairs which was not dark.

"Welcome home, dear. How was your date?"

"Great, Mama! We had a blast."

"Well, that’s goo—Kami, Kagome, are you okay?" Mrs. Higurashi asked upon seeing her daughter’s mode of transportation.

"Fine, Mama. My feet are just a little sore."

"A ‘little sore,’ my ass," Inuyasha muttered under his breath. Mrs. Higurashi also looked like she wanted to say something, but perhaps it was the happiness she could see radiating off of Kagome which stilled her tongue. As Inuyasha carried her daughter up the stairs, she shrugged and resumed reading her book. She would certainly check on Kagome later, but her daughter seemed to believe that the soreness in her feet was normal, so for now she would give her the benefit of the doubt. After such a long and trying road, it warmed her heart to see Kagome so happy, despite any lingering reservations she might still hold concerning the person who made her that way. If happiness was the dominant emotion which Inuyasha inspired in her daughter going forward, then the two of them would have no problems.

At Kagome’s request, Inuyasha set her down inside of the bathroom. She desperately needed a bath for both hygienic and relaxation purposes. She didn’t draw the water as hot as she used to, but a warm bath would soothe her tired muscles and allow her to elevate her feet. She also found that soaking her feet in cooler water with minerals after the bath helped to alleviate soreness. And emotionally, the bath would allow her to unwind after a very satisfying, yet exhausting day out.

"Do you need help getting _in_ the bath?" Inuyasha asked, sounding as though he couldn’t decide whether to be excited or terrified by the prospect.

"No, I can take it from here," Kagome replied, playfully shooing him out of the room. As a result, she missed the determined look which lit up the hanyou’s features just before she closed the door.

By the time Kagome emerged from the bathroom almost an hour later, wrapped in a thick fuzzy bathrobe with her hair dried and combed, she felt a hundred percent better. She still walked gingerly on tender feet and ankles, and cringed a little as she did so. She would definitely not argue when both Inuyasha and her mother inevitably demanded that she take it easy tomorrow. She was sure the former was about to make said demand as soon as she entered her room, but she would not begrudge his concern for her. And if he still felt guilty, she would just have to tell him—or better yet, _show_ him—that she didn’t mind a little discomfort in the name of romance. Just because they apparently weren’t going to move beyond kissing this evening didn’t mean they couldn’t kiss more than once…

She found Inuyasha in her room as expected, but the hanyou seemed surprisingly tense for some unknown reason. He rolled to his feet with almost feline grace when he saw her, his eyes glowing with determination. A shudder of anticipation passed through her.

"Lie down on the bed, Kagome," he ordered gently.

Kagome frowned even as her cheeks colored and her heart leapt within her chest. His words could certainly be interpreted to carry an overtly sexual connotation, but she just wasn’t getting that vibe from him. He had something planned for sure, something which was obviously outside of his comfort zone, but Kagome found herself moving to comply with his request after the barest of hesitations. Both curiosity and excitement drove her to lay on the bed on her right side facing him, but it would never have happened without deep trust.

For a few moments Inuyasha simply gazed down at her, his eyes silently expressing awe. Then without a word, he sat at the end of the bed and pulled her feet into his lap. And when he separated her right foot from her left and grasped it gently in both of his hands, Kagome finally understood what he was up to.

"W-wait, Inuyasha, you don’t have to—oh…oh, my…"

Her moan of appreciation quickly shifted into a hiss of discomfort as Inuyasha’s inexperienced fingers stroked a sore spot in exactly the wrong way. The hanyou nearly lost his nerve at that, and would perhaps have bolted from the room had Kagome not hurriedly reached out to him with her hand. It had taken only a few moments of pleasure for her to realize that asking Inuyasha to cease his ministrations was a very stupid idea. If it felt this nice when he obviously had little idea what he was doing, how good would it feel as he gained confidence and experience? Besides, she could tell that this was going to be as therapeutic for his emotional state as it was for her feet. It had obviously taken quite a bit of effort to muster up the nerve to do this, and it said a lot about how much he cared for her. Smiling reassuringly, Kagome overcame her embarrassment and mumbled a simple suggestion for how to improve his technique, and Inuyasha resumed his tentative massage.

It was trial and error at first, as she knew it would be. But Inuyasha was a quick study, and was determined to learn her preferences. As the minutes passed, Kagome’s instructions became fewer and farther in between. By the time he set her right foot down in his lap and grasped her left in his hands, she was nearing a state of complete incoherency. It took several moments of pleasure deprivation and Inuyasha calling her name for Kagome to rouse her lulled consciousness.

"Wh-What is it, Inuyasha?" she murmured sleepily. She opened her eyes to gaze at him, and immediately experienced a jolt of adrenaline. His golden orbs smoldered with emotion, causing her breath to hitch in her throat. Seeing that he had her full attention, Inuyasha glanced away and rubbed the back of his neck nervously.

"Kagome…I wanted to ask you something. I know that we’re still learning how to…be together, but you should know what I want for… _us_ , even if it’s not right away. That is…will you be my wife?"

Kagome couldn’t help but smile wryly. A fantasy proposal it was not. She was lying on her bed, and Inuyasha literally had her foot in his hands. And yet, she couldn’t detect even an iota of disappointment within herself. What was there to be disappointed about? The man she loved wanted to marry her. His eyes revealed how deeply he loved her in return, as his words had already done. It felt like a dream, even though she never in a million years would have imagined this scenario for a proposal. That didn’t make it any less special. As her lower lip trembled and her eyes filled with tears, she opened her arms in silent invitation. Inuyasha grinned in relief as he moved to accept.

Kagome must have caught him off guard with how tightly she embraced him, and by the way her lips pressed urgently against his own. She felt him gasp as she parted her lips and used her tongue to tease him, but soon enough he responded in kind and Kagome found herself slipping into a different kind of euphoria. But they maintained control of their passions, and pulled away breathlessly after an indulgence which both felt was far too short. There would come a time when they would finally surrender to their passions and experience all of the intimacy that a committed relationship had to offer. But not tonight. Tonight was perfect already, and neither wanted to risk ruining it by doing something they weren’t quite ready for yet, to say nothing of how Kagome’s condition might complicate further intimacy.

"Of course I’ll be your wife, baka," Kagome told him. She didn’t think it was possible for Inuyasha to look any happier than he did in that moment, as he leaned in and kissed her temple. Then his smile turned to a smirk, and he vanished from her field of vision. She sensed him settle in his previous position, and realized with a delightful shiver that her foot massage was not yet over.

Shifting her body into a more comfortable position, Kagome closed her eyes and vowed to enjoy her new fiancé’s attentions to the fullest.

* * *

Inuyasha walked down the stairs in high spirits, with an easy smile gracing his features. And if there was a little bit of a saunter in his gait, who could blame him? Tonight had gone well. _Very_ well. Kagome had agreed to marry him, and then he’d proceeded to massage her into a virtual coma. He could have let her sleep right there, but the bathrobe smelled a little damp and he didn’t want her spending all night in it. So he found an oversized shirt and coaxed his drowsy fiancée into changing. She was so out of it that she stripped off the bathrobe without giving him a chance to look away. He did of course look away…after a few seconds. He had never seen a pregnant woman naked before, and this was Kagome after all. She looked different…but still undeniably beautiful in his eyes. And if tomorrow morning she was embarrassed about the slip, he would simply tell her that. Easier said than done perhaps, but if he could ask her to marry him, then he could probably figure out how to say anything.

"How is she?"

Mrs. Higurashi’s voice snapped him out of his reverie, and he realized that he’d reached his destination.

"She’s fine. Sleeping like a log."

"Ah, so the foot massage was a success then?"

Inuyasha nodded. "Thanks again for suggesting it."

"Don’t mention it. Kagome never liked for me to rub her feet very often, but it helped when they were really sore. Do you think it was just normal soreness?"

"Yeah, I think so. I’ll make her take it easy tomorrow and we’ll see how she feels."

"Sounds like a plan," Mrs. Higurashi declared, covering a yawn. Obviously she had only stayed up to make sure her daughter was all right. "I’m off to bed."

"There was something else," Inuyasha stated, the seriousness of his tone drawing his companion’s full attention. "I…I asked Kagome to marry me." His future mother-in-law studied him for a moment, her expression neutral.

"And she said ‘yes?’"

At Inuyasha’s nod, Mrs. Higurashi sighed. It was heavy, borne of frustration and conflicting emotions. Inuyasha could understand that. He was sure that Kagome’s mother was happy for them on some level, but the memory of her daughter’s struggles was still too fresh for her to fully embrace their relationship. That she was willing to try so hard to accept them spoke volumes to Inuyasha. And eventually he knew that if he continued to make Kagome happy, her mother would fully embrace him as a son.

"Well, you have my blessing, of course," she stated sincerely. "Just please…don’t break her heart again."

"I won’t," he responded firmly. "I never did thank you…for taking care of Kagome while I was gone."

"What choice did I have?" Mrs. Higurashi retorted, her tone slightly bitter. "My daughter was in pain, and I did the best I could to help her, but it was never enough. You were the only one who could truly heal her, and that is why I’m glad you’ve returned. You say you love Kagome and that you’re here to stay…and with each passing day, I become more convinced that you’re telling the truth."

"I am. I’ll prove it."

"I believe you," she answered honestly. After a somewhat awkward silence, she changed the subject. "So when do you think you’ll hold the ceremony?"

"Uh, I dunno. We didn’t talk about it. But I think Kagome might want her family to see her get married before we…purify the Shikon no Tama."

"I think she would like that too," Mrs. Higurashi agreed, knowing full well what purifying the jewel potentially meant. " _I_ would like that," she added after a moment’s hesitation.

"I’m glad. I’ll let her know."

"Thank you," she said, rising to her feet. "And on that note, this time I really am going to bed. Good night, Inuyasha."

"Good night."

"Oh, and one more thing," she stated as she climbed the stairs. "Make sure you talk to Kagome’s grandfather tomorrow."

Inuyasha grimaced. "I was afraid you’d say that."

"Oh, don’t worry about him," she replied with a grin. "You’ll get a lecture, probably a _long_ one at that, but secretly he’s been hoping you’d marry Kagome for some time."

"Keh. Tell me about it," Inuyasha snorted, recalling what had transpired when he and Kagome first informed her family of her pregnancy. _Damn jijii and his stupid sense of honor._ But he sensed that the elderly priest was also concerned with his grandaughter’s happiness. He would just have to remember that while he was getting lectured tomorrow. That would not be fun, but he would put up with much worse for Kagome’s sake. It couldn’t be any more irritating than the lecture he’d received from her three harpy friends, could it?

Either way, the next few weeks promised to be eventful. A pregnancy nearing its end, a potential wedding to plan, a relationship on the mend and who knew what else? He would have to work hard to make sure Kagome didn’t overdo it, especially since he wanted to go out with her again. Her description of the date as ‘a blast’ had been spot on. And if she did overdo it, he could always massage her feet. Hell, he planned on doing that even if she sat on the couch all day.

He held up his hand and studied it, from the hard, calloused palm to the vicious-looking claws crowning each finger. _I used to think these hands were only meant for killing._ Yet another preconceived notion which Kagome had disproved. Soon he would hold a baby, _his_ baby, with these hands. Hands which had slain thousands of enemies during his lifetime, yet now seemed perfectly capable of the gentlest of acts. And when both of them were ready, he would learn how to please a woman with these hands as well. Before tonight, he had wondered deep down whether he was capable of giving pleasure to another person with any part of his body. His one previous sexual experience had caused Kagome only pain. But seeing her turn to putty under his hands tonight had resurrected his faith in himself. He would learn how to satisfy Kagome sexually, just as he had learned how to massage her feet. And as tonight had revealed, he was a quick study. When they were ready, he would show her that he could learn other skills just as swiftly.

In the meantime, he would continue to focus on growing closer to her, and making the last few weeks of her pregnancy as comfortable as possible. They had quite a ways to go to reach the place where they both wanted to be, but after today, the promised land didn’t seem so far off.

Paradise had never been so close.


	47. Where We Want to Be

A fantasy wedding it was not. Only Kagome’s immediate family were present; any more distant relatives who might otherwise have attended were not invited due to the circumstances. Nosy relatives would inevitably ask questions, and if they decided to dig deeper into the groom’s identity, say by going to city hall, then there could be real trouble. Inuyasha didn’t officially exist in this time, so they couldn’t register their marriage as required by Japanese law. As far as the government was concerned, Higurashi Kagome would remain a single woman. Of course, their child would also not be registered, which suited the miko just fine as her son would not be raised in this time.

She also didn’t exactly fit into her mother’s wedding kimono, since her mother had done the proper thing and married _before_ getting knocked up. Somehow they made the garments work, albeit awkwardly. Then again, awkwardness was a constant companion these days. Part of her wondered how she was going to make it through the day. Just putting on the formal attire sapped her energy and caused her to sweat, and her lower extremities were already starting to hurt. Add to that a bladder which was no longer completely continent, and you had a recipe for a miserable bride.

Miserable was not how Kagome felt, however, at least emotionally. The biggest reason for this was obvious—it was her wedding! Perhaps not the _only_ wedding, since she and Inuyasha planned to hold a more elaborate ceremony in the feudal era where their friends and the whole village could participate. But this was her first wedding; after today, she would be married in the eyes of everyone who mattered to her on this side of the well. That prospect was exhilarating to say the least. She also had ample reason to be touched by the support of the attendees. Eri, Yuka, and Ayumi had come despite their obvious reservations, concerns which Kagome found perfectly reasonable. Her family members were still not entirely comfortable, and they knew a lot more of her and Inuyasha’s story than the modern teenagers did. The fact that Eri, Yuka, and Ayumi were willing to put their reservations aside and join her in celebration meant a lot.

Kagome could say the same for her mother, who appeared to be experiencing a wide palette of mixed emotions. These ranged from normal emotions which any mother might feel on a daughter’s wedding day to strange worries which few parents in history had ever been confronted with. But Mrs. Higurashi was happy because her daughter was happy, and just before going outside Kagome embraced her tightly and thanked her for everything.

Ultimately, the most enjoyable thing about the day for Kagome was seeing Inuyasha. The traditional Japanese wedding was a formal, almost solemn affair. There was no ‘you may kiss the bride,’ no clapping or cheering at the conclusion of the ceremony. Her grandfather had asked an old friend to preside, a fellow priest with a stern face and a businesslike demeanor. Kagome sensed that the elderly priest disapproved of her pregnancy, Inuyasha’s exotic looks, and especially the highly unorthodox cloth hat which the hanyou wore to cover his ears. Her grandfather had lent him the garment on the condition of absolute secrecy. If anyone asked, they would be told that it was traditional for the groom’s head to be covered in Inuyasha’s home town, somewhere in the most rural part of Hokkaido prefecture.

None of this seemed to bother the hanyou. He wore his heart on the sleeve of her father’s wedding kimono, not even attempting to conceal how much this meant to him. From the moment Kagome first glimpsed him, standing tall and proudly on the shrine grounds while exuding an air of quiet confidence tinged with anticipation, she could think of nothing other than how much she loved him. All of the day’s little imperfections melted away. Inuyasha seldom acted in accordance with his noble lineage, the regal bearing he had inherited from both of his parents, yet today that part of him was on full display. Far from emulating his cold half-brother, however, he gladly revealed the strength and substance of his feelings to anyone who cared to look. They were in his movements, slightly stiff with nervousness but graceful nonetheless; in his bright golden eyes which he could never tear away from his bride for long; and in the hint of a smile which never left his lips, even during the most solemn portions of the ceremony.

After the San San Kudo, which was performed with a nonalcoholic sake substitute due to Kagome’s condition, the priest presented Inuyasha with a scroll containing the traditional wedding vow, which the hanyou read in a strong, confident voice. Instead of handing it back to the priest, however, he paused for a moment before continuing in his own words. He was not especially eloquent, but the words were heartfelt, and completely Inuyasha.

"I was lost when I met Kagome. She gave me a purpose in life, a reason to wake up and face each day. She came to love me, and I…screwed it all up." This comment drew light laughter from the gathering, and Inuyasha managed a wry smile. "I don’t know how she still loves me. It’s unbelievable. I’ve never been the man she deserves, but still…we’re here today getting married. I guess…I should thank her for sticking with me, and her friends and family for giving me a chance. I know it’s not just because she’s pregnant that you all—"

At this point the elderly priest started to move to silence Inuyasha. The old man had been literally biting his tongue to keep quiet as this impertinent youth made a mockery of a centuries-old sacred ceremony, but bringing up the child conceived in wedlock was too much! Not that Inuyasha cared in the slightest about social taboos.

"What? We’re not supposed to talk about it? Fu— _Forget_ that!" he declared, catching the curse at the last possible instant. "I used to think that Kagome getting pregnant was a mistake," he continued, speaking to everyone once more. "Maybe it was. But it’s also a _blessing_. This baby helped me understand the truth about how I feel about Kagome…something I should have realized a long time ago. I’m just glad that by the time I finally did pull my head out of my— _understand_ , that it wasn’t too late."

Finally, Inuyasha turned to Kagome and knelt before her, gripping one of her hands in both of his own as he gazed into her eyes.

"Kagome, I’m not going to promise you that I’ll never screw up. You know me, and you know that’s not possible. But…I will never again give you any reason to doubt my loyalty…or how much I love you. That’s my promise to you, on my honor, on my life. So Kagome, I ask you once more…will you be my wife?"

"Inuyasha…" she breathed, reaching up to tenderly cup the side of his face. He reciprocated the gesture, wiping a tear from her cheek with the pad of his thumb. They might have had their very own version of ‘you may kiss the bride’ right then and there, if the priest had not cleared his throat loudly enough to make Inuyasha jump. He was red in the face and appeared almost ready to storm out. Deciding he’d tempted fate enough for one day, Inuyasha got back into his proper position and the rest of the ceremony went off without a hitch—or any additional deviations from tradition. Unless of course one counted the bright smiles he and Kagome sported for the remainder of the ceremony.

The first thing anyone wanted to talk about at the reception was Inuyasha’s vows. Ayumi was in hopeless romantic heaven, and the rest of the gathering was also fairly impressed. In the midst of a tradition steeped in rich history and formality, Inuyasha had found a way to express himself in the most unsophisticatedly beautiful way. Even Kagome’s grandfather made his way over to quietly express his approval. He also admitted that perhaps he should have recommended a different priest, his way of apologizing for his friend’s demeanor. Much to everyone’s surprise, Inuyasha muttered a ‘keh’ and told his new grandfather-in-law not to worry about it. In his own words, ‘arguing with that old codger helped me figure out what to say.’ After some additional cajoling, the hanyou confessed that he had not planned the speech, that he’d made a snap decision after finishing the traditional vow. The words provided by the priest had not been empty; they were in fact quite powerful and spoke of a serious commitment. But at the same time, they didn’t seem right for him and Kagome, given everything they’d been through. And they hadn’t encompassed everything he wanted to say to his new wife.

By the time the reception wound down and Kagome’s friends departed for home, the miko was dead on her feet. Inuyasha escorted her to her room and gently ordered her not to come out until she’d gotten some rest. What constituted a sufficient amount of rest was open to interpretation, but Kagome didn’t particularly care at the moment. She also didn’t care that Inuyasha saw her in her underwear as he helped her change into something more comfortable. He was her husband; soon he would be doing much more than just looking. But all of that was for later. Right now, the only thing which interested Kagome was sleep. She was out as soon as her head hit the pillow.

A few hours later, a much refreshed newlywed emerged from her bedroom. Her first stop was the bathroom to relieve her throbbing bladder, after which she failed to resist the temptation of a warm soak in the tub. It would take her longer to reunite with her husband and family this way, but at least she would look, smell, and feel presentable when she did. In the end, it was just as well that she had taken her time. Inuyasha was not in the house, and her mother said that he had certainly kept himself busy during her nap. After helping to clean up after the reception, he had snatched the broom from her grandfather’s hands and swept the entire grounds. Then he had hopped through the well for an hour or two, and finally upon his return he’d noticed her grandfather in the storage shed and gone to lend a much-needed hand there. That was where Kagome found him. After she softly called his name, there was a bustle of activity behind the closed door.

"Wah! Be careful with that! It’s a priceless fam—"

"Aw, shut it, jijii. Everything in here’s a ‘priceless family heirloom.’" Inuyasha’s words were harsh but his tone was not, and her grandfather’s reply was more of a return banter than anything else.

"Shameful! Kids these days…no respect for history."

"Keh. I’m _from_ history, in case you forgot. Besides, my _wife_ is calling me," Inuyasha declared, slightly emphasizing the word as though his tongue wasn’t quite used to it yet. "You all set in here?"

"Yes, yes, go on. Show my granddaughter your surprise. Have fun, but don’t let her overdo it. You make sure she gets her rest!"

Kagome could picture her grandfather shaking his finger at Inuyasha, but the hanyou nonchalantly agreed to his demands on his way out the door. The entire conversation was strange but also wonderful to hear. Their relationship had grown more casual recently, but now Jii-chan appeared to be treating Inuyasha like his own grandson. The hanyou was slowly being accepted by his wife’s family, as any other husband would hope to be. It was still a work in progress, but Kagome had faith that things would be even better by the time they were ready to purify the Shikon no Tama.

"Hey, Kagome," he greeted with an easy grin. "Feeling better?"

Kagome suppressed a giggle at his appearance. Clad once more in his fire-rat robes—which he had probably changed into at the earliest opportunity—he resembled the slightly younger hanyou from her memories, the one who used to come poking his nose around the shrine while pretending that he didn’t miss her. Oh, how things had changed since then. It struck Kagome how unguarded his eyes were now. It was as though he didn’t have a care in the world, which she knew to be untrue. But all of the worries which used to hang over him were gone—guilt and self-loathing over Kikyou, and fears of failure and rejection among them. At the moment, all she could see reflected back at her was happiness.

"Much better," she replied cheerfully. "Now…what ‘surprise’ were you going to show me?"

Inuyasha rolled his eyes. "Heard that, did you? Damn jijii can’t keep his mouth shut."

"I _heard_ that," her grandfather called from inside the shed.

"Yeah, well be a little more discreet next time!"

The word ‘discreet’ sounded funny coming from Inuyasha, so Kagome chuckled quietly to herself.

"What’s so funny, wench?" her husband demanded with feigned anger. Kagome arched an eyebrow. _Oh, so that’s how it’s going to be from now on, is it? I get called by my name unless I ‘displease’ him._ Inuyasha’s smirk indicated that he knew exactly what she was thinking, and suggested that his response might be something along the lines of ‘what, you didn’t think I’d stop calling you that just because we’re married, now did you?’ Honestly, Kagome would have to answer in the negative. She didn’t truly mind, since Inuyasha hadn’t abused the nickname or verbally insulted her in any way in a long time. As long as he called her by her name in front of their children, they wouldn’t have an issue. And she was pretty sure he’d figure that out on his own without her having to say anything. If it ever became something other than a term of endearment for private moments, then it would probably be the least of their worries at the time.

"Don’t dodge the question, baka," she told him, her grin widening. _See, I’ve got my own little term of endearment for you, too._ Inuyasha had been his own special sort of baka since the day they met, and would probably be one until the day he died. She wouldn’t have him any other way.

"Keh. If you’re up for it, then let’s go," Inuyasha declared, taking her hand and leading her over to the well house. By now Kagome knew what he had in mind. Since the evening when he proposed to her, Inuyasha had taken her running in the feudal era whenever she felt up to it, which was usually a few times a week. He always carried her in his arms, which the miko didn’t mind since her preferred method of riding on his back was impossible. On the bright side, being in his arms meant that she didn’t have to concentrate on holding on at all; she could simply enjoy the view of the world around her and the feel of the man holding her. And the position was perfect for kissing, an activity in which they happily partook whenever they ran—during breaks, of course. Inuyasha liked to bring her to a new place each time, allowing the tranquil solitude and the beauty of their surroundings to put both of them in the right mood. Thus far the kissing had been mostly of the languid variety, and they had yet to move beyond exploratory caresses over their clothing, but Kagome had a feeling that might change very soon. It was their wedding night, after all. Nervousness sparked within her at the thought, but she pushed it aside. There was nothing she could do about the things which made her worry, but she vowed not to let them ruin her and Inuyasha’s evening.

Instead of taking her into the forest, Inuyasha headed toward the village. This gave Kagome an idea of what his surprise might be, but still the sight of the new hut caused her to gasp. It was not the structure itself which came as a shock, but the state of its completion.

"I thought they weren’t going to finish it until after the harvest?" she asked breathlessly.

"I called in a few favors," Inuyasha stated proudly. "And made a few promises. You may not see much of me during harvest time," he admitted sheepishly.

"But…I thought you were going to help them with the harvest anyway?"

"Yeah, well they didn’t need to know that. Now I’ll just have to help more, probably dawn ‘til dusk. If I’m lucky."

"Well, I’m sure they’ll appreciate the help."

"Keh. They’d better."

"I certainly appreciate it, Inuyasha," she told him, reaching up to run her fingers over an ear. "Can we go inside?"

Inuyasha carried her over the threshold and set her down on the wood floor, then stood back and watched her anxiously. Kagome had formed a picture in her mind of what the completed home would look like, but reality was even better. It was larger than the average dwelling of the time period, probably at Inuyasha’s insistence since he knew she grew up in a big house. Kagome didn’t really care about that, but she did appreciate the other luxuries her hanyou had installed, especially the unusual number of futon mattresses piled together to form a bed which could probably rival her modern mattress in terms of comfort. The long seat made from wood and piled with cushions to look suspiciously similar to the living room couch was also a nice touch.

"How did you afford all this?" Kagome asked, knowing that some of these items must have been purchased at the regional market.

Inuyasha shrugged. "I collected some nice furs, and Miroku traded them for me. I don’t think it was enough to pay for everything, but he wouldn’t really tell me. Next time we go on an exorcism I’ll make him take my share of the payment, and then we should be even. So…do you like it?"

"I love it," she replied, looping her arms around his neck and pulling him down for a reassuring kiss. When she pulled away, all of her hanyou’s nervousness had disappeared.

"Still up for that run, Kagome?"

"I am if you are."

In no time she was flying. Inuyasha seemed to have an extra spring in his step this afternoon, which could be explained by any number of reasons, from his newlywed status to her approval of their new home. The ride was still as smooth as ever, so far from complaining, Kagome felt her own excitement rise with his exuberance. Inuyasha carried her to where a forest stream broke into a waterfall before continuing downstream. A small pool had formed underneath the falls, the waters kept clear by the constant flow. Kagome quickly discovered that her hanyou’s exuberance extended to other matters as well. Again, not that she was complaining.

Eventually she pulled away from the kiss before it became too heated. She fully intended for them to give in to their passions this evening, but not here in the middle of the forest. She was sure they would spend plenty of future ‘alone’ time in nature—Inuyasha was a very ‘outdoorsy’ person, after all—but she wanted their first time as husband and wife to be in their new home, on that comfy-looking bed. Since she still didn’t remember their one and only previous sexual encounter, this was essentially her first time, period. She felt like a virgin, even though that was obviously not the case.

Inuyasha stuck his nose in her hair and breathed deeply, his way of calming a raging libido. Oddly enough, his scent could have a similarly soothing effect on her. But when she leaned her cheek against his haori and inhaled through her nose, she discovered that his scent was less rugged and woodsy and more…pungent than usual. Inuyasha must have sensed her reaction, because he pulled back suddenly and caught her crinkling her nose with a grimace.

"What, do I smell or something?" he demanded defensively.

"A little," she replied apologetically. Inuyasha frowned, then lifted his free arm and sniffed his armpit experimentally. When he yanked his face away and blanched, Kagome burst out laughing. He glared at her, but couldn’t quite pull off the feigned annoyance and was soon chuckling as well.

"I guess I could use a bath," he admitted.

"I’ll say! I’ve never known you to sweat very much, Inuyasha."

"Yeah, well you’ve never known me to get married either. That shit is stressful," he replied with a grin.

"Ah, that explains it. Do you want to go back through the well?"

"Keh. Why the hell would we do that when there’s perfectly good water right here?" he said, tilting his head toward the pool. In the next instant his expression sobered, his demeanor becoming completely serious. Kagome realized the idea which had occurred to him just before he voiced it.

"Do you…want to join me?"

"Another time," she replied gently, for a variety of reasons. The only ones she would admit to were having recently bathed in the modern era, and not wishing to provide any further temptation before they made it back home. Inuyasha seemed disappointed for a moment, but then his grin turned roguish and he stood and began carrying her toward the water anyway.

"Inuyasha, what are you doing?"

"Leave your clothes on and come for a swim, wench. It’ll be fun."

"Kyaa! You wouldn’t dare!" she cried, tightening her grip on his neck. Not that this would do any good, since he would just jump right in with her.

"All right, all right," he relented, snickering to himself as he set her on her feet. He then put his hands on his hips and gazed at her with a look which said, ‘well, you gonna turn around or what?’ Kagome did turn around, but only so she could settle herself against a convenient tree trunk facing the water. She then folded her arms over her chest and gazed at him expectantly, somehow mustering a convincing smirk as the butterflies swarmed in her stomach. Inuyasha’s eyes widened as he realized two things: first, that Kagome did not intend to turn around, and second, that she had every right to look. He swallowed the lump in his throat and spun on his heel, his body tense. Kagome might have found amusement in his nervousness if her own heart wasn’t beating so rapidly.

What followed was not much of a striptease, but she had not expected one from her hanyou, who was no more sexually experienced than she was. His upper body was nothing she hadn’t seen before, but his tentative movements were endearing, and just because his muscular back was familiar to her didn’t mean that she found it any less attractive. He hesitated before removing his hakama, then stood on the bank facing away from her for a few moments, completely naked. Her scent must have told him all he needed to know about her opinion of his body, because there was just a hint of a swagger in his step as he strode forward and dove headfirst into the pool.

Kagome exhaled the breath she’d been holding, resisting the urge to start fanning herself. _Oh, my…_ She was going to have such fun with that firm backside of his. The thought of his perfect form caused her to frown and bite her lower lip. How mismatched could two people possibly be? He a real-life Adonis, with barely an ounce of fat on him, and she a bloated, semi-continent whale. _Inuyasha doesn’t see you that way._ It was all well and good to tell herself that, but she still harbored doubts. Her unattractive appearance was the other primary reason why Kagome had declined to join him in bathing, but it was not the only worry which lurked in the darker corners of her mind.

She had yet to see Inuyasha’s front this evening, but she remembered how sore she was on ‘the morning after’ and assumed that he was fairly large. Even if that proved untrue, she wondered if she would be able to make love at all. The books could say that normal sex was fine during pregnancy, but that was not true for all women, especially during the final week before delivery. Maybe it would be different if they’d been sexually active throughout her pregnancy, but she hadn’t had anything larger than a speculum in her body for almost nine months. Combined with how lousy she felt in general and in that specific area, the best case would be a high degree of discomfort for her. In the worst case, penetration would be too painful to allow intercourse. Either way, Kagome didn’t expect to experience much pleasure from lovemaking.

She had already decided that none of this mattered. This was their wedding night, and they were damn well going to make love if at all possible. If Inuyasha enjoyed it, then that would be enough for her. Still, like any other person with an unpleasant experience on the horizon, she couldn’t stop thinking about it or completely quash her nerves.

Suddenly receiving the distinct impression that she was being watched, Kagome looked up to find Inuyasha gazing at her from the pool with a small frown marring his features. She shook her head and plastered on a smile which was only partially forced, silently telling him that nothing was wrong. He stared at her for a moment, then submerged himself and began to wash. Kagome sighed under her breath. Sometimes her husband was too perceptive for his own good.

Silence settled over the pair, the normal auditory palette of nature supplemented only by the soft sounds of Inuyasha moving through the water. Eventually Kagome remembered something she’d wanted to say since the wedding, once she got him alone.

"Inuyasha, what you said today…it was beautiful."

"Keh. Don’t know if I’d call it that. I’m not exactly a poet."

Kagome chuckled. "If you started reciting poetry, I’d wonder what was wrong with you. But seriously, it was…beautiful in its own way. It meant a lot to me, and it helped my friends and family feel better about us getting married. Thank you for doing that."

"That wasn’t why I did it," Inuyasha replied. "I just…wanted to say something more than that vow the priest gave me."

"I know…that makes it even more special."

Inuyasha blushed under the praise and submerged himself to hide it, drawing a giggle from his wife. When his face next rose from the water, however, there was a fire in his eyes which caused Kagome’s heart to flutter. Her husband was apparently confident enough to emerge from the pool in a much more seductive manner than he had entered it, but unfortunately fate had other ideas. A cool breeze blew in from the east, bringing with it a scent which Inuyasha obviously did not like. He exited the pool quickly, all thoughts of seduction forgotten. Kagome stretched out her spiritual senses and picked up the approaching aura of youki, wishing ardently for her bow and arrows as a large oni pushed its way through the trees.

Their opponent, however, was neither intelligent nor especially strong, which perhaps explained how it had managed to sneak up on them. They had plenty of warning to prepare for combat, but not enough for Inuyasha to don his hakama. Kagome tried not to be too distracted by his nakedness as she watched him fight. Ultimately, the battle lasted all of fifteen seconds. Inuyasha dodged a couple clumsy strikes from the oni’s fists, always keeping himself between his wife and his opponent, until finally he was able to set his feet and obliterate the thing with a Kaze no Kizu. As blood and viscera rained down all around him, the victorious and still naked hanyou turned to face her with the fully-transformed Tetsusaiga leaning casually against his shoulder. It was an image which would be forever seared into Kagome’s memory. Could he possibly be any sexier?

Nonetheless, her mood soured quickly as she fingered the Shikon no Tama, suspended by a chain around her neck. "We have got to get rid of this stupid thing," she muttered, knowing that the lure of the jewel was what had drawn the oni here in the first place.

"Keh. It ain’t that much of a rush, wench. I just killed that thing buck-ass naked, you know."

Oh, Kagome knew that all too well. Having raised her eyes at the sound of Inuyasha’s approaching voice, her gaze lingered predictably on certain parts of his anatomy before she realized it, resulting in a flustered miko and a hanyou whose male ego was growing by the second.

"I’m serious," she retorted, forcefully averting her gaze. "We can’t keep tempting fate like this, Inuyasha. All it takes is one slip…"

"I don’t slip," he stated, his voice confident and reassuring rather than arrogant. She clearly wasn’t buying it, so he lowered his tone to a more somber octave. "It’s fine, Kagome, really. I check the forest every day, but this one’s youki and scent were so weak that it must have slipped past me. I was never in any danger."

"I know that, Inuyasha. But even a weak youkai could kill a villager…or our son."

"That’s not going to happen," he promised, stepping close and wrapping his arms around her. She sighed and slumped into him despite the dampness of his skin, accepting his comfort.

"Look, Kagome, I’ll admit that not purifying the jewel is a risk. But I’m doing everything I can to keep it from biting us in the ass, and it’s for a good reason. Your mother deserves to meet her grandson. And besides," he added lightly, "how would I ever explain to your kid brother that he never gets to see his nephew?"

Kagome chuckled despite her melancholy. "Souta would be pretty heartbroken."

"There, you see! It’s for a good cause. If it makes you feel better, I’ll carry your bow and arrows whenever we go running from now on so you can back me up. Okay?"

"Okay," Kagome breathed with a smile. Logically it probably wasn’t the smartest thing to do, but Inuyasha was right that their reasons were sound, and that he was doing what he could to minimize the risks. She appreciated that he understood how important this was to her, and was willing to essentially talk her into it when her concerns grew too much to bear. She leaned up to show him how much she appreciated it, but promptly pulled back from the kiss as her lips encountered a positively vile flavor.

"Oh, what the hell is the matter now?" Inuyasha demanded exasperatedly.

"I think you need another bath," Kagome teased. "You taste like youkai guts." After a couple experimental sniffs in his direction, her grin twisted into a mischievous smirk. "And you don’t smell so good either."

Inuyasha’s eyes narrowed. "Okay, that’s it. You’re going for a swim now."

"What? No! Put me down! Kyaaaaaaaaaaa!!!"

*Splash*

* * *

The delectable aroma of something tasty cooking nearby drew Kagome from her slumber. She sat up with what had become customary awkwardness, glancing around at the inside of their new home with confusion since she didn’t remember falling asleep here. Or putting on this nice warm robe. Understanding dawned as her recollection returned. _I must have fallen sleep on the way back._ Splashing around in the pool with Inuyasha—a still very naked Inuyasha—had been a blast. That is until her energy-sapping condition reared its ugly head in the form of sudden and powerful fatigue. Inuyasha ushered her out of the water as soon as he noticed, then donned his hakama and wrapped her in his haori and kosode before proceeding to carry her back here. She was naked under this robe, so he must have removed her wet clothing and undergarments before putting her to bed. She briefly wondered if he had taken any liberties with his eyes, before realizing how hypocritical that sounded. Besides, she wasn’t even sure if he would want to look.

She certainly did not have any qualms staring at his body, as she discovered when she located him by the fire pit. He was still topless, his robes likely drying in the breeze outside. The light from the flames danced almost hypnotically over his skin as he closely observed the cooking meal. Finally he turned his head to gaze at her, the same happiness she had noticed before swimming in his golden orbs.

"Feeling better?"

Kagome grinned wryly. _I’m getting tired of making him ask me that._ "Much better," she repeated. "Sorry I’m so feeble these days."

"Keh. Don’t be. You’re doing the hard part."

"It’s not so hard when I’m with you," she answered, cringing at how cheesy that sounded. But Inuyasha just blushed a bit and smiled sincerely.

"She gave me a purpose in life, a reason to wake up and face each day…"

When he trailed off, Kagome groaned in disappointment. "Mm, keep going."

"Do you remember what comes next, wench?" he asked jokingly.

"Yep. Keep going."

Shrugging, Inuyasha did as he was bid. What followed was both touching and humorous, inspiring both tears and laughter. By the end of it, he was kneeling before her on one knee, once more promising undying loyalty and love and asking her to be his wife. They kissed, sweetly but with passion simmering just beneath the surface. When they pulled apart, Inuyasha returned to the fire pit and Kagome lay on her side facing him.

"Make sure you don’t forget those words," she told him. "I’m sure that’s not the last time I’ll ask you to say them."

"Heh, maybe I’m not such a bad wordsmith after all."

" _Wordsmith?_ I wouldn’t go that far."

"You think you could do better, wench?"

"I intend to."

"Huh?"

"At our wedding on this side of the well. I’m going to make you one hell of a vow."

Inuyasha snorted. "The bride reading a vow? That’s real traditional."

"Look at us, Inuyasha. Are we traditional in even the slightest way?"

"Good point."

Playful banter transitioned into companionable silence as they shared the meal, a simple but tasty dish of meat, rice, and vegetables. Kagome expressed surprise that Inuyasha possessed even that level of cooking skill, but the hanyou confessed to taking lessons from Kaede and Sango over the past several weeks. Evidently he didn’t want his pregnant wife cooking for him if she didn’t feel up to it, which was odd for a man to say in the feudal era. Some men in this time period would say that it was the woman’s job to cook, whether she felt up to it or not. Having grown up in the wilds, however—and with little hope of ever getting married at all—Inuyasha held little regard for the traditional gender roles of human society. That their closest friends would also likely never have the orthodox man-and-wife relationship also no doubt influenced him. One thing was for sure—as long as Inuyasha was doing the cooking, their meals would never be too spicy.

After dinner, they visited briefly with Kaede, with whom Shippou was also staying since he sometimes felt like a third wheel with Miroku and Sango, especially in the evening. While the newlyweds were always courteous and never purposely gave any indication that they wanted to be alone, the young fox was smart and observant enough to realize when his presence was the only thing preventing the adults from partaking in certain ‘adult’ activities which he wasn’t supposed to know about yet. As his friends all settled down and started families, Shippou had spoken of going off on his own to search for more of his kind. He would of course return since he regarded this village as his home, but Kagome could understand his desire to interact with other kitsune. She worried about him, of course, but Shippou had survived on his own after his parents died. And without the Shikon no Tama nearby, the odds of him encountering any danger which he couldn’t escape from were slim. Ultimately, he was a youkai, albeit a young one, and he possessed the right and the ability to make his own decisions. Inuyasha and Kagome could guide and support him, but he needed to forge his own path in the world.

They next dropped in on Miroku and Sango, after Inuyasha’s ears and nose confirmed that they weren’t interrupting anything. To the contrary, Miroku especially seemed happy to see them, probably so the comedic material which he had come up with regarding their wedding night would not go to waste. None of his teasing was overly explicit, but his hidden meaning was obvious to anyone who knew him well. Inuyasha and Kagome took it all in stride, and honestly the miko seemed more embarrassed than her husband. Inuyasha even fired back a few times, once insinuating that the monk should stop worrying about others and tend to his own affairs. To which Miroku quickly replied that he had everything ‘well in hand,’ and sometimes felt that the world had fallen ‘into his lap.’ That one earned him a bonk on the head from his wife, but there was no question as to the winner of the males’ not-so-subtle pissing contest. Inuyasha really should have known better than to challenge Miroku in that particular arena. But again, the hanyou took it all in stride, which seemed odd to Kagome and a little worrisome for some reason which she couldn’t yet comprehend.

As their friends departed for the evening, Miroku and Sango reiterated how much they were looking forward to the larger, more festive wedding planned for the village after the baby was born. They had volunteered to handle the preparations, and with so many other things going on in their lives, Inuyasha and Kagome had happily accepted. From how enthusiastic the monk and taijiya were, they knew it had been the right decision.

Kagome’s heart thundered in her chest as she and her husband made their way back to their home, excitement mingling with anxiety as she thought of what they would soon be doing in their marital bed. Inuyasha, however, seemed oblivious to her inner conflict and behaved as though nothing was out of the ordinary. He performed a quick check of the immediate area just to make sure nothing nasty had crept in, but then seemed perfectly content to simply go to bed. Kagome went out of her way to inject a little sensuality into her voice and movements, and although Inuyasha seemed to notice, he never acted on the unspoken invitation. And minutes later, she found herself lying next to him on the futon, listening to his deep, even breathing. He wasn’t asleep, but perhaps he was trying to pretend that he was.

Kagome almost left him alone. She thought she knew why he wasn’t interested in partaking in customary wedding night activities, but she wanted to give him a chance to prove her wrong. Eventually she managed to gather enough courage and indignation to ask him directly.

"Inuyasha?"

"Hm?" He did not sound pleased to hear her voice, which caused her resolve to falter all by itself. But she swallowed the lump in her throat and pressed on.

"Don’t you want to…make love?"

He sighed. "Not tonight, Kagome." Now he sounded like he was pleading with her to understand, which of course she did, all too well.

"Oh…okay."

As she rolled over onto her side facing away from him, Kagome vowed not to cry. If Inuyasha didn’t want to be with her because of the state of her body, she would not guilt him into it. _No wonder he wasn’t really embarrassed by what Miroku said. He never intended to have sex with me tonight at all._ She didn’t even get a chance to reflect upon how this might affect their relationship before the hanyou swore under his breath. The next thing Kagome knew, Inuyasha was practically draped over her back, his arm looped around her torso. She gasped at the sensation of something hard pressing firmly against her backside.

"Dammit, wench. Don’t be stupid. It’s not because I don’t want you. Does _this_ ," he added, thrusting his hips for effect, "feel like I don’t want you?" The only response Kagome could manage was a shake of her head.

"Damn right it doesn’t," he declared, his tone frustrated but not hostile. "I get like _this_ just about every time we kiss…or from swimming with you…or from changing your clothes before." The last part he admitted as though he wasn’t sure if he should be ashamed. Kagome might have confirmed that he had nothing to be ashamed of if she wasn’t so confused.

"Then…why don’t you want to be with me?"

Inuyasha paused for a few moments, obviously choosing his words with care. "I just…I know how lousy you’ve felt lately, Kagome. And I didn’t think you’d feel like having someone touch you…like that…right now. Can you honestly tell me that I’m wrong?"

Now it was the miko’s turn to sigh, knowing full well how futile it was to lie to him about something so important. "No, you’re not wrong."

"But you would do it for me." It was not a question, but Kagome still nodded in response.

"Well screw that," Inuyasha stated sharply, before immediately continuing in a much gentler tone. "When we…make love for the first time as man and wife, I want it to be for both of us. I can wait."

At last Kagome realized how foolish she’d been. This was Inuyasha, the man she loved, and one with a heart far purer than he even realized. _Yep, you’re an idiot all right. Good thing he loves you._ She rolled over to face him, gazing apologetically into his bright golden orbs.

"I’m sorry, Inuyasha."

"Don’t be. Just don’t assume the worst, okay? Not that I haven’t made that mistake before…"

She shook her head, not wishing to dwell on the past. Clearly the past would always be with them, but the unpleasant memories did not have to play any role in their future.

"Are you sure you don’t mind waiting? It might be two or three months after the baby is born…"

"Keh. It won’t be easy, but I’ll manage. You just tell me as soon as you’re ready. I don’t even care where we are at the time," he joked, cracking a smile so she’d know that he was only being humorous. Kagome did chuckle a bit, then shifted her body more fully into his embrace and leaned her head against his chest. She felt him kiss the top of her head, then bury his nose in her hair and inhale deeply the way he always did when trying to calm his libido. The action caused sudden inspiration to strike Kagome, and she briefly considered whether she had the guts to actually go through with her idea. _Hell yes, I do._ Inuyasha had been so sweet today…he deserved a little reward, did he not?

The hanyou nearly swallowed his tongue when her hand wrapped around his still semi-hard member. He gritted his teeth as she pumped him firmly; within a few strokes he was fully erect again.

"K-Kagome? Wh-what are you—"

"Be quiet, Inuyasha," she told him sensually, sitting upright to gaze down at him, her hand never relinquishing its hold or ceasing its movements. "Just because we’re not going to make love tonight doesn’t mean that I can’t make you feel good."

"B-but, you don’t have to—"

She silenced him with a finger to his lips. "I know I don’t have to, Inuyasha. I _want_ to. Now, no more talking."

Any further protests on the hanyou’s part were cut off by her lips pressing insistently against his own. She pulled away just as he was starting to take control of the kiss. Most of the time she was content to let him lead, but not tonight. Tonight was about bringing him more pleasure than he ever thought possible, and to do that she needed him to submit to her. Looking at him now, his lips slightly bruised and his eyes glazed over with passion, she didn’t think that would be a problem.

For Inuyasha’s part, he had quickly decided that resisting Kagome would be one of the dumbest things he’d ever done. She was a woman on a mission, and that mission was pleasing him. He was already the luckiest damn hanyou ever conceived just to be married to her, but this…this was more than he had ever expected. His eyes rolled back into his head when she pulled his hakama down and gripped his bare flesh for the first time. Why was this so much better than when he occasionally took care of himself? Perhaps it was because when he masturbated, it was mostly about his sense of touch. This was exponentially more stimulating. The woman of his dreams was kneeling above him, stroking his cock as she gazed down at him with a look of determination in her eyes, reveling in his every grunt and groan. The sounds of her elevated heartbeat and heavy breathing reverberated in his ears, and the scent of her arousal coiled around him. It was almost too much.

With his eyes closed in rapture, he didn’t see Kagome smirk, or sense her shifting position in time to prepare himself for what was to come. He nearly bucked off of the futon as something soft and moist stroked the underside of his cock from base to tip. Even when he managed to lift his head to gaze down at himself, he couldn’t believe his eyes. Kagome…couldn’t possibly have licked him, could she? Yet, her eyes glowed with satisfaction as she drank in his reactions, and she leaned in to do it again.

His half-hearted protests turned into an uncontrollable moan. He’d thought that Kagome intended to simply bring him off with her hands, which would have been amazing by itself. This, however, was something he never would have imagined even in his wildest dreams. This act…it was wrong, wasn’t it? Humans called this sodomy, didn’t they? He’d heard men talking before. This was something you could get a whore to do, but never your wife. It was dirty and too demeaning to ask the mother of your children to perform. Or so they said.

It didn’t feel dirty, not when Kagome licked him and certainly not when she took him in her mouth. He would never be able to adequately describe those sensations no matter how long he tried. It would be a waste of effort, anyway; some things were too incredible to describe with words. The humans who considered this act dirty didn’t know what they were talking about, at least as it pertained to a man and woman who loved each other. And he seriously doubted that Kagome felt demeaned right now. If anything, she must feel empowered. Despite her obvious lack of experience with this act, she’d still managed to turn him into a man-shaped blob which threatened to dissolve and seep into the floorboards if she stopped what she was doing. Fortunately, Kagome had no intention of stopping. And when she pulled back and sucked strongly on the head of his cock, Inuyasha turned his brain off and gave himself over fully to his lover’s attentions.

After Inuyasha’s vocal and shuddering climax, Kagome took a swig of water from the basin and lay on her side facing him, watching as his breathing gradually slowed. The taste wasn’t that bad, and seeing him writhe beneath her in a state of complete and utter euphoria was certainly worth it. Idly she wondered if being pleasured that way would feel as wonderful for her if they reversed their positions. Somehow, she didn’t think her hanyou would mind showing her when she was ready. Sure enough, the first words out of his mouth confirmed it.

"I’ll make that up to you," he promised, his voice still somewhat breathless as he gazed at her with satiated, half-lidded eyes.

"Inuyasha, it’s not something you have to make up to me. I did it because I wanted to."

"No, you don’t understand, wench. I’m _going_ to make it up to you." He grinned wryly. "Male pride is at stake here."

"Ah, well then I guess I can’t argue with you."

"As soon as you’re ready, wench. I mean, the _instant._ "

"Yes, yes, I get it Inuyasha," she replied, even as a delightful shiver passed down her spine. Inuyasha wasn’t motivated by his own physical desires, especially since as she had shown him this evening she could satisfy his sexual urges without having him touch her in return. Rather, he wanted to return the pleasure she had given him. _Knowing Inuyasha, he might even turn it into some kind of competition_. That would be one game which she wouldn’t mind losing. They would wait until she was truly ready—since Inuyasha would sense if she was only pretending to be ready—but once her body was healed from the birth, she would let her hanyou show her what he could do. And that was definitely something to look forward to.

"Thank you, Kagome," he stated seriously, to which the miko responded by leaning in for a quick kiss.

"You don’t have to thank me every time we have sex, Inuyasha."

"Keh. Not just for that. For everything."

Kagome smiled sincerely. "I think we both have a lot to be grateful for."

They kissed again, this time languidly and driven by love rather than physical passion. They cuddled together for a while in the peace of the night, before Kagome rolled over and nodded off to sleep, with her husband spooning her from behind. Eventually, Inuyasha drifted off to slumber as well, once his body had fully cooled down. He hadn’t thought it possible to look forward any more than he already did to the end of Kagome’s pregnancy, but he certainly did now. The only thing he could imagine with greater anticipation was holding his child in his arms.

When Kagome went into labor, probably within the week, he would no doubt turn into a nervous wreck. He would hate that she would be in pain and there was nothing he could do about it. But he would trust in Kaede’s experienced hands, and support his wife in whatever way he could. And when the baby was crying in their arms, suckling from Kagome’s breast or gazing happily up at them with a heartwarming smile, he was sure that both of them would agree that even with everything they had been through, all of the trials and heartache, they wouldn’t change a thing.


	48. Paradise (Epilogue)

Kagome was roused from slumber by her husband kissing the side of her neck and softly rubbing her shoulder. It was his way of waking her gently, and it usually meant that their son was awake and ready to be fed. Sure enough, Kagome could sense the small motions of the tiny body lying next to her on the bed. By this point, the baby understood that he didn’t have to cry when he was hungry in the middle of the night; his father would sense his alertness if he moved around or fussed a little. He made a contented cooing sound as she drew him close to her chest and pulled aside the fold of her sleeping yukata. She sighed in bliss as he latched on, her breasts no longer sore as they had been for the first couple weeks. It was times like these, feeding her baby in the peace of the night with her husband by her side, that she enjoyed motherhood the most.

Little Shoichi was almost three months old now. His name had not been chosen as a tribute to anyone in particular, but because it had been one of the few which both of his parents liked. Written one way, it meant ‘soaring first son,’ which seemed appropriate for a variety of reasons. In the physical sense, his youkai blood would one day allow him to ‘soar’ in the same way his father did. Also, both Inuyasha and Kagome had faith that as long as they raised him right, he would grow to become a great man. Who knew the heights he would reach?

Kagome sensed him nodding off and gently shifted him to her other breast, encouraging him to finish feeding. If she didn’t, she knew from experience that he would soon be awake and hungry again. It was far better to have him fill his belly in one feeding, because then the chances were good that he would sleep until morning. Shoichi only waking up once during the night was a recent development, and a most welcome one. With cautious optimism, Kagome could imagine that the worst of the restless nights were behind her.

It had taken her and Inuyasha some time, and quite a bit of arguing, but they had finally come to a consensus on a parenting strategy for the evenings. Kagome would feed the baby when he was hungry, but Inuyasha would handle everything else. Most of the time, the miko didn’t even need to open her eyes, which made it that much easier to fall back to sleep. If the baby needed to be changed, Inuyasha would take care of it, at least while the sun was down. During the day, that job fell on Kagome as long as she was nearby. It was a fair compromise, and she couldn’t begin to guess how much extra sleep it had earned her. One of the benefits of having a hanyou for a husband was that he could function on significantly less sleep than she could.

Inuyasha’s lips on her neck roused her with a slight jolt, causing her to realize that she had been nodding off herself. She shifted Shoichi again to encourage him to finish. Then she turned her head to the side with a grin, a silent signal which her husband almost never missed. His kiss was wonderfully tender, intended to help her relax rather than arouse her. It was exactly what she wanted. Shoichi released her breast, and Inuyasha pulled away from the kiss soon after. Kagome didn’t even need to ask if Shoichi was wet; her husband getting out of bed provided the answer. He walked around to her side of the bed and she leaned back to make it easier for him to scoop up the fidgeting infant.

"Hey, little man," Inuyasha greeted as he straightened his back, Shoichi held securely in his arms. "You need to be changed again? I thought I told you to quit going whenever you pleased."

The baby chirped happily in response to his father’s voice, bringing a smile to Kagome’s face. Inuyasha didn’t do baby talk. You would never hear him cooing to the infant or making nonsense words in a high-pitched voice. But he loved talking to his son, especially when they were alone or it was just the three of them. Inuyasha was still shy about outwardly showing affection in the presence of others, but when no one else was around, he would speak to Shoichi in this voice which Kagome had never heard him use with anyone else before. It was so tender, and so revealing of how much he loved his son. If she had any doubts, that voice would be all the evidence she would need to know that Inuyasha was going to be a great father.

"All right, let’s get you changed," he said as he strode over to the changing area in the corner. "Just remember, no crapping until your mother wakes up tomorrow morning."

Kagome chuckled and shook her head. Urine didn’t bother him so much, but Inuyasha had a particular aversion to soiled diapers, as anyone with an especially sensitive nose might. He would often try to persuade the baby to only defecate when it was her turn on diaper duty. Of course Shoichi didn’t care; he went whenever he felt like it. But other than some half-hearted grumbling, Inuyasha never truly complained when it was time to roll up his sleeves. His unending attentiveness and patience with Shoichi might have surprised someone who didn’t know him as well as Kagome did. Even when being a parent became more frustrating than rewarding, such as those few bad nights when they had been unable to get the baby to settle down, Inuyasha had never been anything less than loving.

Yawning, Kagome settled on her side and tried to go back to sleep. Shoichi was in good hands. If the baby seemed drowsy, Inuyasha would probably put him back in bed next to her. If he was alert and wasn’t ready to fall asleep right away, then Inuyasha would stay up with him for a bit and eventually put him in the basket on the floor on the other side of the bed. They had made the basket a very comfortable place for him to sleep, and though Shoichi seemed to prefer being in bed with them, he didn’t mind the basket too much. But Kagome loved falling asleep next to the baby in the evening, and it was practical for breastfeeding. The basket came about as a way to help her sleep better after his nightly feedings, and so far it was working like a charm. Eventually Shoichi would learn his lesson—if you want to stay in bed with Okaa-san and Otou-san, then go right back to sleep after you finish eating.

This was the first of many lessons which she and Inuyasha would attempt to teach their young son. They were continuing to grow together as parents and learned something new almost every day. It had not been, nor was it ever going to be, completely smooth sailing. But Shoichi was a happy, healthy infant who spent most of his waking moments brightening the day of whoever he happened to be around. She and Inuyasha were doing just fine so far, and she had no reason to believe that would ever change.

* * *

"All done," Inuyasha declared quietly, picking Shoichi up from the changing table. "So what do you think? Ready to go back to sleep next to Okaa-san?"

Shoichi just stared at him with those big golden eyes of his. They were a shade darker than his father’s, but it was obvious just from looking at them that they were closely related, despite the tuft of raven hair which he had inherited from his mother. Then he started kicking his little feet, causing Inuyasha to chuckle a bit.

"Wide awake, huh? All right, settle down. Otou-san knows what you want."

Shoichi loved to be outside at any time, but especially at night. Inuyasha could understand why. It was quiet; there was no one bothering him or vying for his attention. It was just him and his father, sharing something which only they could enjoy. To those with adequate senses, the night was full of sights, sounds and smells which one could never experience while the sun was up. Shoichi loved staring up at the moon and the stars, his furry ears swiveling to and fro and his little nose twitching. It was stimulating for the baby, but the tranquility and darkness also encouraged him to go back to sleep, which he usually did in relatively short order.

Inuyasha leapt up to the roof of their home and sat cross-legged, settling Shoichi in his lap. Then he simply watched his son, marveling at the little quarter-youkai’s innocent fascination with his surroundings. A firefly fluttered into Shoichi’s line of sight, and the baby attempted to follow it with all of his senses, even making an uncoordinated grab for it with his hand. Inuyasha used both of his own hands to catch the insect in a makeshift cage. When it settled on his palm, he removed his top hand and held the other flat so Shoichi could see the tiny insect, its tail still flickering brightly. A few seconds later the firefly took off again, and Shoichi watched it go, burbling happily. Then an owl hooted in the distance, and his ears swiveled in that direction, the firefly completely forgotten.

Inuyasha’s perennial smile faded a bit. Part of him had been secretly hoping that Shoichi would be born with human ears, so that he could easily pass for human. The inability to do so had caused Inuyasha much suffering during his younger days. He had to forcibly remind himself that Shoichi’s circumstances were drastically different. He actually had a father, a role model with youkai blood to guide him as he grew up. And he would be raised in a village which more or less accepted his kind, rather than a hostile castle where the only refuge from ridicule and hatred was his mother. Still, there would be times during Shoichi’s life when he would wish for the ability to blend into human society without a disguise.

Then again, perhaps having inu-style ears would not prove much of a hindrance for him at all. Perhaps he would take pride in being different and live his life accordingly. Inuyasha had only recently begun attempting to live by the same creed. After growing up the way he had, it was definitely a work in progress. He had faith that his ‘soaring first son’ would do better than he ever could. He often wondered what Shoichi would be like, both in personality and in physical makeup. Some of those questions had already been answered—for example, it was clear that he would exhibit most of his father’s outwardly inhuman traits. The only exception was his hair color. And he definitely seemed to possess enhanced senses, though whether they would be as strong as his father’s remained to be seen.

As did a lot of things. As far as he and Kagome knew, Shoichi was the first quarter-youkai in history. So much was unknown, a whole lifetime of mysteries which the young family would need to solve together. How strong would Shoichi be? How would the dilution of his grandfather’s youkai blood affect him? Would said youkai blood need to be sealed, as his father’s was? When the boy was older, Inuyasha would consult with Myouga and Totosai about sealing Shoichi’s blood, as his father had done for him. If there was any doubt that the quarter-youkai would be able to maintain complete control when his life was in mortal danger, then they would fashion a sealing sword or some other object for him. In this instance it was far better to be safe than sorry.

As for whether Shoichi would experience the other state of transformation which afflicted his father, the answer was most definitely in the affirmative. Inuyasha cringed at the memories. To say that Shoichi hated becoming human would be an understatement. Everything about his body felt wrong. He couldn’t smell his parents anymore, and he could barely see or hear them. His transformations always occurred at night, which meant a miserable evening for all three of them. The only thing which would console him was Kagome’s breast, which he tended to latch onto more for reassurance than for nourishment. If they kept a fire going for light, they could sometimes get him to fall into a fitful sleep in between them, and perhaps get a few hours of shuteye themselves. But they would never plan on Shoichi’s human nights as being restful, at least until he was old enough to understand what was happening.

Though frustrating, his times of weakness were also illuminating. Unlike his father, Shoichi’s internal clock did not seem to be synchronized with the lunar cycle. Rather than occurring every twenty-nine to thirty days on the new moon, his times of weakness seemed to take place every twenty-one or twenty-two days, regardless of the phase of the moon. The likely reason for this made sense to Inuyasha. He became human once a month because the strain produced by his youkai blood became too much for his half-human body to bear. Shoichi had less youkai in him, but his body was also three-quarters human, meaning that his youkai blood overstressed his body in a shorter period of time. Obviously, the youkai blood was dominant over the human—Inuyasha’s own experienced told him as much. Because his father was an insanely powerful daiyoukai, he himself was stronger than most full-youkai, despite being a ‘mere’ hanyou. If youkai and human blood truly merged on equal footing, then his full-youkai half-brother would be twice as strong as he was. And that was certainly not the case, as their history had shown.

So if he had to guess, Inuyasha would say that Shoichi would not be as powerful as he was, but that his physical abilities would be much closer to his father’s than to an average human’s. Power didn’t matter to Inuyasha, except as a survival tool. His children needed to be strong enough to survive in a world filled with hostile youkai and humans who hated their kind. In case something happened to him, they needed to possess the strength and fighting ability to protect their mother and their home village. That was their responsibility as inheritors of the blood of the Inu no Taisho. As long as they could protect the ones they loved, then Inuyasha didn’t care if they ever surpassed him. On the contrary, he hoped they never had to.

Thinking about Sesshoumaru reminded him of their recent confrontation. Though given their history, what happened a couple weeks ago could hardly be called a ‘confrontation.’ The daiyoukai had suddenly shown up at the village one afternoon with Kagura and Rin in tow. He appeared to be fully healed from his brush with death against Hakago, an experience which had perhaps humbled him a bit. Inuyasha had been on high alert, unsure of his half-brother’s intentions. But Sesshoumaru did not seem to be interested in fighting. On the contrary, the primary purpose of his visit had ostensibly been to determine whether the village was a suitable place for Rin to finish growing up. The little girl had departed with him, but no one doubted that she would soon return on a more permanent basis.

Of course, if Inuyasha had provoked Sesshoumaru, say by being arrogant or reminding him of the battle, then he was sure the daiyoukai would have attacked him. Whether that would be with killing intent or merely to teach the upstart hanyou a lesson, Inuyasha couldn’t say. In any case, with a wife and infant to protect, he hadn’t seen any reason to prod his irritable half-brother. Especially when he still felt guilty about the whole thing. It was one thing to severely injure a relative in self-defense. It was another to nearly kill your only brother because you were stupid enough to allow an enemy to possess your body. He was extremely glad that Sesshoumaru had managed to escape that day.

And so it came to pass that for one of their first times in their lives, the two half-brothers were civil to each other. It was clear that they didn’t especially like each other, and that would probably never change. And while Sesshoumaru had not held Shoichi, he had studied him in Kagome’s arms for a moment before departing with a short nod, as if to say ‘he is no more unworthy of Chichi-ue’s blood than his father is.’ _Keh. Arrogant jackass._ Still, as long as Sesshoumaru was nice to Shoichi, he wouldn’t object to the quarter-youkai establishing some sort of relationship with his uncle. He was likely the only uncle Shoichi would ever know, after all.

Inuyasha sighed dejectedly at the reminder that while he and Kagome were blessed with a healthy baby and a wonderful place to live, not everything had worked out as they hoped. Purifying the Shikon no Tama had been surprisingly simple, almost anticlimactic really. After working tirelessly for an entire day to make the jewel as pure as possible, Kagome wished for it to disappear. And so it did. The wish was the only completely selfless one they could think of, and it had worked perfectly. Unfortunately, as the power of the Shikon no Tama vanished from this world, so did the temporal abilities of the bone eater’s well. Kagome was still dealing with the repercussions, a wound which would fade over time but which would never completely heal. She was glad that her family had spent a few wonderful weeks getting to know Shoichi. Even though he would likely never remember his family from five hundred years in the future, the memories of that blissful time would live on in the hearts of his parents and those loved ones kept from them by the indomitable wall of time.

Kagome also drew comfort from a solemn promise which Inuyasha had made to her. That is, if he survived for the next five hundred years, he would go and visit her family. Even if his appearance made Jii-chan look like a middle-aged man in comparison, he would go and tell their story. And if he didn’t live long enough, he would pass that duty on to a trusted descendant. No matter what, Kagome’s family would know what had happened to them.

This topic had led to a rather poignant discussion about something which he and Kagome had never really talked about—the difference in their lifespans. Given the trials their relationship had gone through, it was no surprise that this unpleasant subject had been pushed to the proverbial back burner. But now they were in a committed relationship; they _had_ to discuss it. Predictably, Kagome expressed sorrow that she would age and die long before he did. But Inuyasha was sincere when he promised that he would cherish the time they had together with no regrets. A human lifespan with her was infinitely better than not having her at all. Besides, it was not as though her life would flash past in the blink of an eye. Kagome probably had at least thirty reproductive years left. There were no certainties in life, but some humans lived to Kaede’s age and beyond. Even if in her advanced age Kagome became unable to physically express their love, he couldn’t imagine anyone he would rather spend his days with. He had known exactly what he was committing to when he made his improvised vows and married her. Even when death parted them, he would have no regrets.

Kagome would always hold sadness in her heart for him, and he would always assure her that she had nothing to be sorry for. He would gladly suffer through an eternity of loss and grief in exchange for a single human lifetime with her. And he would never truly be alone. In his own words, ‘someone has to keep an eye on our mischievous brats.’ If they grew up to be anything like their father—or their mother, for that matter—then trouble would find them, or vice versa. Inuyasha could imagine himself as the patriarch of an ever-growing extended family, guiding his descendants through the annals of history. Based on lessons carefully learned through his wife, he would tell them when it was safe to live in Japan, when to retire to the more remote parts of the country, and when it might be best to leave the country altogether. They would do their best not to interfere with the course of history, but that did not mean that they needed to be ignorant of it.

That, however, was all in the distant future. For now, he would treat each day as a new paradise, a blank canvas to paint with great strokes and add to the grand tapestry of their marriage. Kagome would continue her training as the village miko and healer, successor to Kaede. And he would maintain his roles as protector of the village, youkai exterminator, and a jack of all trades who was willing to learn almost anything in the service of his community. They would raise their children and help them find their own places in this ever-changing world in which they lived. And when the inevitable conclusion of his own life drew nigh, he would look to the afterlife with a smile, knowing that his soul mate waited for him on the other side.

A soft sigh drew Inuyasha from his musings. Shoichi was nodding off, his eyes heavy-lidded and drooping. Inuyasha picked him up and began to gently rock him, knowing that this would accelerate the process of lulling a tired infant. Sure enough, within a few moments Shoichi was sound asleep.

Inuyasha vaulted gingerly down from the roof, careful not to jostle his precious cargo. With one final, contented glance up into the night sky, he went inside to rejoin his wife.

　

The End

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A/N – I always get a little misty-eyed when a story comes to an end. But what a journey it has been! I initially didn’t expect the story to be anywhere near this long. I estimated 20 chapters, which seems ridiculous now. To say it ran away with me would be an understatement. I delved in great detail into certain portions of the story which surprised me—the Shichinintai arc and Inuyasha and Kagura’s adventures in the youkai graveyard to name a couple. The story became as much about those scenes for me as the main storyline. But of course, it was always an Inu/Kag romance at heart. And I hope the ending did that justice, with all of the trials and tribulations they went through. I know many of you wanted the bone eater’s well to remain open, but mirroring the canon ending seemed to be a fitting way to conclude this story. 
> 
> As per usual, I don’t know where I’ll go from here. I never know if an Inuyasha story will be my last, or if some new inspiration will strike me. I’m always open to the possibility. Thank you to all of the reviewers, even the negative ones. I don’t always agree with what is said, but I do read and consider every comment. They encourage and influence me, and ultimately, I think the result of the positive and negative feedback is a better story. 
> 
> Regards,  
> King Baka


End file.
